see 1992 for 1 & 4 January 1993 episodes
Originally transmitted: 6, 8, 11, 13 & 15 January 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 21 - Friday 25 February 2000
Episode Numbers: 3486 - 3490

Monday (3486, Wednesday 6 January 1993)

But we start out quietly, well, not really that quietly as the traffic is thick and noisy on Coronation street this morning. In side the Platt household you can hear the horns of impatient drivers. Impatience reigns inside too as Martin is short and agitated (both states rather normal for him!) Increasingly so as Gail has him hunting for a missing shoe for Sarah and Nicky pesters him for money. Matters aren't helped when Gail shouts from upstairs that she's got the shoe (but didn't tell him)

Outside, Alf and Ken survey the traffic ruefully. Martin has the little Platts, now conveniently coated and shod, rounded up and ready to try to cross the road. Gail mentions that the bottleneck is caused by people avoiding some newly minted one way streets nearby. Oh Great! Martin huffs. Gail correctly diagnoses Martin's problem. He's edgy because he's going back to college after the holiday break, the first time he'll encounter Carmel after the Christmas Day ejection.

Tracy is glumly back to school today as well. Liz sympathizes and Ken offers her a lift but she has to meet Debbie and trips over her lip on the way past them.

In the Kabin, Jack tells the girls that his only resolution for the new year is to make this one better than the last which won't be difficult to do after the year he and Vera had, first with Terry going down and then Lisa taking Tommy back to Blackpool. Jack regretfully shakes his head at the memory of visiting Terry over the holidays and declares that it's inhuman to cage a man up over Christmas. Mavis witters on about the gerbil they minded over Christmas and sticks her feet in it up to her ankles when she chats about letting the little thing out to run free and now of course it'll be caged up again. Pity as it had become quite a cheerful little friend. Jack looks at her with something close to venom as he gets his own back, reminding Mavis the schoolchildren are only fattening the gerbil up to dissect it and leaves forthwith. Rita gives Mavis a baleful look, "Well if you will compare their Terry to a gerbil you get what you deserve!" Mavis flusters and looks dismayed, But she didn't...... did she?

Doreen Horton springs a surprise on Lisa, they are going to pay to have the back room redecorated for Tommy's nursery so she'll feel more settled. She can pick the colours and all. Lisa is appreciative but, no time like the present, hesitantly tells her mother that she's leaving. Her father immediately and correctly assumes she's leaving for Des which she confirms. She braces herself for his reaction which is swift and nasty. She's mad, this is a sick joke isn't it? And he works himself into quite a lather, insulting toe rag Terry, chancer Des and even Lisa herself. Lisa stays calm and dignified when really, a bit more emotion would be called for you would think but she stands her ground firmly. Her father accuses her of being unhinged and running after the first man to show any sympathy. Doreen yelps ineffectively now and then but doesn't really have much to add. She does disapprove of Lisa's actions but is more concerned with her husband's aggressive verbal attack on her daughter which nearly turns physical as he lunges toward Lisa, fist raised. Lisa swerves to avoid it and Doreen holds Jeff back. Even then Lisa just calmly decides to take herself and the baby off for a walk to give her father time to cool off.

Meanwhile Des is in the Kabin asking after a "Welcome to your new home" card but the Kabin doesn't have any. He's not very forthcoming about who he's buying it for and leaves. Bet is there and the three ladies comment on Des's recent mood upswing until that little ray of sunshine Alf comes in with a face like a wet weekend. He moans about the traffic delaying his delivery trucks and being a councilor, gets a bit of grief over owt he can do which is nowt. He trundles off back to his shop mumbling and Bet cashes in and buys the birthday card she's picked out for Vicky's 16th tomorrow. There's a bit of chat about Steve and Victoria being split up and i get the impression that Bet would rather they not get back together though she doesn't really mind Steve.

Gail and Alma chat about Carmel's antics, wondering how Martin is getting on at college (we don't find out) Gail does trust Martin but seems to be having doubts just the same. After all, Carmel said Martin loved her back and now she's got a flat all on her own. (Does she wonder if perhaps he's protesting just a shade too much?) Alma avers that Martin is one of the good ones and she shouldn't worry.

Andy tries to tell Liz that watching cartoons is part of a college sociology project but of course he's having her on. Steve comes home to change into a respectable outfit for his driving re-test. Brothers engage in a bit of bonding banter.

In the bar, Vicky comes out for crisps and in answer to Raquel's question, replies with determination that she wants nothing to do with Steve. Raquel watches Vicky go back inside and remarks that she feels Vicky still fancies Steve, she's got all the symptoms. Liz overhears and agrees, saying that she thinks Steve wants to get back with Vicky too but he's too stubborn. Raquel recalls a fight with her first boyfriend when he lent his best ruler to another girl. He's married now and has four kiddies! Jack sticks his oar in and reckons the lad must be lending out his ruler quite a bit then. Only to be told to wash his mouth out with soap! LOL!

Sally herds the little ones out of the cafe and into the traffic. Nicky pops in with Mark (it's dinnertime, i think the school lunch didn't interest them) When Nicky is sent on an errand at the freezer, Mark strikes up a conversation with Tracy who's having a drink waiting for Debbie. He thinks Ken and his mom might get married because every time he comes around they stop talking so he's sure they're up to something. Tracy is uncomfortable talking to Mark, knowing what she knows and the smoke starts wafting out of her ears. Mark starts talking about Tracy's dad. The smoke gets thicker and ashes start floating as Tracy tells Mark that Ken isn't her real dad. He lives in Holland. Mark asks if she ever sees him. She says she doesn't even remember him. The temperature rises as Mark declares he'd want to see his real dad if it were him. It's weird, he says, she has two dads and he hasn't any. Wow,! Ever see a volcano explode???? KaBOOM! The lava flows and Tracy spills...... and tells Mark that Mike Baldwin is his real dad and proves it by saying her mother and father told her so. She thinks Mark ought to know something like that if it's true.

Back to Blackpool things are calm for the moment. Lisa and her parents are sitting at the table. Lisa tries to be reasonable and thanks her parents for all they've done for her but is insistent she's leaving with Des. She defends Des as a much nicer man than Terry but it's no use. Her father gets all hot and bothered again, accusing Lisa of getting off with Des as soon as they turned the key in the lock of Terry's cell. She defends herself, maintaining that quiet dignity but Daddy roars a predictable "If you leave you won't set foot in here again!" Mother sputters ineffectively and Lisa agrees. That's fine then. She's off to get packed.

Bet, Mike and Raquel chat about children. Mike carefully explains that the circumstances just weren't right or he would have had children, catching Bet's eye briefly but astutely (Does she know or am i imagining things?) Steve arrives to celebrate passing his drivers test and passes Mike the certificate to prove it. Having his confidence bolstered by one success he decides to take a chance on another and asks Bet if he can go back to see Vicky. He is reluctantly allowed to take his chances.

In the back, Vicky is doing French homework and answers any of Steve's comments and questions with cool short answers avoiding eye contact. But he shuffles around the room and leans over her shoulder to peer at her work and apologizes for the Suzie Johnson incident and compliments her. Vicky thaws and smiles and they make a date for tomorrow night for a birthday outing. Before he leaves, she thanks him for apologizing and gives him a quick kiss. He allows that it was harder to do than the driving test!

Audrey is visiting Alma this evening, so she tells Rita and Mavis near the end of the business day. Mike comes in for cigars and recognizes Audrey's impending visit, saying he's been told to make himself scarce for the night but isn't up to going out on the town. Must be settling down, an old married man, he grins and leaves. Mavis thinks marriage does agree with Mike as he's been quite pleased with himself lately. But Rita raises an eyebrow and eerily foretells that it's more like the smile on the face of a tiger.

Ken has been summoned to Maggy's. Mark hasn't come home from school and it's hours since and now dark. She's frantic and has no idea where he is. Ken says Nicky saw him at lunchtime but that he took off abruptly. He agrees she should call the police but just as she's gotten connected Mark walks in. He's pale, with red eyes and looks shattered, his world crashed down around his ears. He says nothing in reply to his mother's insistent questions but finally asks, Is it true that Mike Baldwin is his real father! Ken and Maggy freeze in shock!

Mike at that moment is in the Rovers chatting to Raquel about her Wayne's football career. Raquel describes Wayne's attitude as quite serious, he won't even see her on Wednesday's through Fridays. Jack reckons he's got another bird or doesn't want his strength sapping. Des arrives so Vera, stood at the bar, makes obvious comments to Jack, loud enough for Des to hear, about Terry pining away for Lisa and speculating on how soon he could be paroled. Des looks uncomfortable and avoids eye contact.

Back to Ken and Maggy. Mark is sitting on the sofa, head in his hands crying. Maggy hovers trying to find out how he discovered this. Mark admits Tracy told him, not Mike, which shocks Ken who says he didn't tell her! (it's true, she told him!) Mark beseeches his mother to tell him it is all a lie but she can't. Still he insists it must be and becomes quite distraught and runs out of the room. Maggy turns on Ken and accuses his family of doing quite enough!

Diane Johnston

Doreen Horton: ANNIE RAITT Jeff Horton: DICKEN ASHWORTH
Written by HARRY DUFFIN Directed by CHARLES LAUDER

Tuesday (3487, Friday 8 January 1993)

Maggie drops Mark off at school and both her "goodbye" to him and the approaching Ken's "hello" are pointedly ignored. Ken walks on to see Maggie, who confirms that Mark isn't speaking to her, or him, either, it appears. Maggie anguishes that Mark is shattered, his whole world is upside down. Ken assures her that Mark will come through it, but Maggie is not as certain. Ken tells Maggie he hasn't seen Tracy since she let the cat out of the bag. Maggie is understandably furious at Tracy. "You tell her the pain she's caused," she says. Ken will speak to her, he says, but he can't see the point in laying into her - the damage has been done. "Don't I know it," says Maggie angrily.

At the Rovers, Vickie comes downstairs to be greeted with a big "Happy Birthday" and an even bigger hug from Bet. It's her Sweet Sixteenth. There are several things in the post, including a card and gift from Alec (a bracelet). There's also a very large card containing a bank note from Bet, who says Vickie must spend it on anything she likes - they can go shopping that afternoon if she likes. The last card is from Steve. "So, it's all on again, is it?" asks Bet. Yes, it seems so, Vickie confirms - in fact he's taking her out that night.

Steve is at that moment in the Cafe with Big Mike Baldwin, planning the business day. Gail grumbles about Mike using the Cafe as his office but Alma is just grateful he's back to his little money-making schemes and has forgotten about Mark for the moment - although she doesn't know how long *that* will last. Over at the table, Mike is informing Steve that the t-shirt order for the Golf & Country Club is needed immediately and he is to deliver them today, just the other side of Lancaster. "In the Jag?" asks Steve hopefully. Yes, since he's (finally!) legal and they don't have a ten-ton truck, in the Jag. Mike sends Steve off on his errand with instructions to get a Mr. Ramsden to sign for the shirts.

Don has entered the Cafe and while chatting to Gail, offers his and Ivy's babysitting services as needed now that he understands they've lost Carmel. Gail informs him that they in fact "chucked her out", and that while she won't go into details, Carmel did lead her "right down the garden path". Don commiserates: "Bit of a mystery, young girls, aren't they?"

Which is our segue to Weatherfield School where Tracy and a gaggle of mysterious young things are giggling over an article. (Teen Beat? Tiger Beat? 16? Ah, well, they're the ones we read on this side of the pond. Be still my heart!) Ken calls out that he wants a word with Tracy, but RTracy, no slouch she, beats it outta there toute suite, leaving Ken looking rather embarrassed in front of the Lip Gloss Squad!

Steve has made a beeline not for Lancaster but for the Rovers, where he suggests Vickie accompany him on the drive. Bet frees her from their shopping date and she goes to get her coat. While she's away, Steve asks Bet and Liz (who, along with Bet, is preparing to open) not to mention to Mike Baldwin that he's taking Vickie with him. Liz frets that he shouldn't be taking her at all, he should be working, but he assures her he *is* working, he's just making a delivery, "it's cool". Bet reassures a still-fretting Liz after the pair leave that they'll be okay.

Raquel and Jack, watching the goings-on from behind the bar, have a priceless exchange. Raquel: Oh, he's a good lookin' lad, in'e, Steve MacDonald. He's got all the girls after 'im! Jack: (dismissive) Easy enough when you've got a car. R: Oh yeah? That why you never 'ad any girlfriends? J: What, me? Never had any birds? When I were 'is age, I 'ad to beat 'em off with a stick! And I didn't 'ave a car! No, (now nostalgic) all's I 'ad was an old rubber tire I used to roll down the street. R: (sarcastically) Oh, 'ow exciting! J: Eventually, I got a clapped-out old banger. R: Oh, aye? J: Oh, not a car. RVera, I'm talkin' about.

RVera is just then entering the Corner Shop, where Des is buying a few things and bantering with Deirdre. His greeting to her as he leaves is ignored. Deirdre makes a comment to Vera about Des always being cheerful. "What's he got to be cheerful about, except ruinin' people's lives?" spits Vera. Deirdre says she think "she's" well over that - they *are* talking about Raquel, aren't they? "'Eck as like!" protests Vera. "Me and RTerry! Can't see me grandson for who knows how long. Why? All because of *him*! Sniffin' around Lisa! And RTerry...where he is." (Vee is now warming to her subject and on a roll.) "The only reason she went to Blackpool was to get away from *him*. She'd be in this street right now if it weren't for *him*!"

Meanwhile, at Deirdre's, Tracy opens the door and is very surprised to see Maggie Redmond on the doorstep! "Me mum's out... she's still at work," she says nervously, but of course it isn't Deirdre Maggie came to see, it's Tracy. Tracy at first pretends she doesn't know why, which hardly lessens Maggie's anger. She tries to tell Tracy how much damage she's done, that Mark is devastated, but Tracy's attitude is that she "only told him the truth" and that "he had to find out sometime". She claims the reason Mark is upset is not that Tracy revealed the truth, but that Maggie kept it from him all this time in the first place. In response to Maggie's comment that as Mark's mother it was up to her to decide, Tracy responds that Mark "had a right to know".

Maggie, frustrated (and who wouldn't be in the face of such stubborn and implacable youthful sanctimony?), mutters that it was probably Deirdre's fault for telling Tracy in the first place. "Still, she never had much sense. If she had she wouldn't have given Baldwin the time of day," she snaps, half to herself. "Just because YOU don't like Mike Baldwin..." Tracy begins, then trails off. "What do you mean about me mum?" Maggie is highly agitated now. "Well, you're so righteous about everybody knowing what's what! I have a very good reason for keeping Mike Baldwin away from Mark. Ask your mother - she knows all about Mike Baldwin!" "What do you mean?" asks Tracy. "Well, she had an affair with him, that's why! You ever wonder why your father hated him so much? Well, now you know." Maggie pauses as she realizes what she's said. "Well," she continues, "you were the one who insisted on the truth being told. I'm sorry about that, I shouldn't have told you. Anyway, now you know. It hurts, doesn't it?" she finishes nastily before walking out on a stunned Tracy. (At least, I think she was supposed to be stunned. As her blank expression essentially didn't change from the beginning of their exchange to the end, save the occasional frown, it was difficult to tell.)

In Lancaster, Vickie and Steve park on a hillside overlooking the city lights with the radio playing. (Take anyone else back? Ah, to be sixteen again and gazing at the sparkling lights of a town while listening to the Top Ten on a car radio with a boy you're positively *mad* about.) Vickie confides to Steve that Alec has a girlfriend. ("Well, she's not exactly a 'girl', she quite old, actually, but you know what I mean," she explains to my amusement.) Steve agrees not to tell Liz, as she might tell Bet, and Vickie doesn't want Bet to be hurt. Vickie wonders if they shouldn't be getting back so Steve doesn't get into trouble (it's dark already after all!) while Steve scoffs that he'll handle Baldwin. He tells her he's glad she's back, which delights her, and they kiss.

At the Horton household in Blackpool, Lisa and Bebeh Tommeh are about to depart with Des. Lisa's parents are both opposed, but her father is absolutely furious, begging her not to jump into what he is certain will be another bad relationship. She assures him she knows what she's doing and he snaps that that's what she said about Terry Duckworth! (Touche!) Des attempts to pour oil on the waters, saying "Lisa doesn't want to fall out with you and neither do I." "I'm not speaking to you," spits Mr. Horton. "I've nowt to say to you, now or ever!" Des carries out the last of the bags and Mr. Horton begs Lisa again to stay, but to no avail. By the time Lisa's mother tearfully follows her to the car he's growling to let her go if that's what she wants.

Deirdre strolls into the house, cheerfully announcing that she's home. Tracy's sitting at the kitchen table, red-eyed, a crumpled tissue in her hand. "What's wrong?" asks Deirdre in alarm. "Mrs. Redmond came here," says Tracy flatly. "Why? What's been going on?" asks the baffled Dee. Maggie was angry, says Tracy, because Tracy told Mark who his real father is. Deirdre is naturally very upset and begins to scold Tracy. Tracy, however, is about to hit her with the second half of this one-two combo. "So, she told me about Mike Baldwin." "What do you mean?" asks Deirdre slowly. "About you and him." Watching Deirdre's face, Tracy knows. "It's true, isn't it?" Deirdre at first tries to pretend she has no idea what Tracy's talking about. "You had an affair with him, didn't you?" Tracy asks point-blank. "Listen," begins the cornered Deirdre, "I don't know how to explain it to you." "I knew it was true," says Tracy bitterly.

Back in Blackpool, Mrs. Horton has followed Lisa to Des' car, assuring her that her father doesn't mean what he says, she'll talk to him, he'll come around, he loves Lisa. He appears at the door to instruct Lisa's mum to come in. "Let her go if that's what she wants," he says in a cold voice.

It's now evening and in the Rovers, Mike Baldwin is none too pleased that nobody's seen his employee or his Jaguar. He fumes that the trip was only an hour and a quarter up the motorway - Steve should've been back hours ago! Bet warns Liz on the quiet that Mike's on the warpath about the missing Steve. Liz is shocked to hear that Steve isn't back yet.

At a table in a corner, Don and Martin have a drink. Martin confides that he didn't tell Gail *everything* about Carmel's holiday reindeer games - such as waking up one morning and finding her in bed next to him! Don's advice is that what Gail doesn't know won't hurt her.

Back at Dreary's, Tracy and her mum continuing slanging over Deirdre's affair. Deirdre keeps saying Tracy doesn't understand; Tracy keeps saying that she understands all too well. Her opinion of her mother is truly in the toilet. When Deirdre says she won't go into "the whys and wherefores" of the relationship, Tracy devastatingly replies that she's not surprised, as it would show Deirdre for what she is. Finally, Dee says she isn't proud of what she did, but she won't justify herself to her daughter. However, she points out, Ken understood, and she'd hoped Tracy would.

Tracy's particularly upset by what she sees as Deirdre's hypocrisy - that Ken forgave Deirdre, yet Deirdre kicked him out "when he had that girlfriend" and wouldn't take him back even though Tracy and Ken both begged her to. Things don't work like that, pleads Deirdre. "You made me think it was all his fault," shouts Tracy. "I hate you!" She prepares to leave the house, refusing to tell her mother where she's going. In response to Deirdre's declaration that she can't go, she replies "Don't tell me what to do. Never again. You're not entitled. Because I know what you are now!" The door slams behind her.

At the Rover's back door, Steve drops Victoria off and kisses her. They plan to meet later, eightish, for their birthday date. Bet warns Steve that Mike's in the bar "spitting fire". Steve makes haste to return the car. Vickie tells Bet dreamily that it was "the best birthday I ever had".

Out at the bar, Steve's turned up looking as if butter wouldn't melt in his mouth and hands Mike not only the keys to the Jag but a cock and bull story about having to wait until 4 p.m. for Mr. Ramsden's signature for the tees as Mike requested. He's been waiting around all day? says an incredulous Mike "Why didn't you get someone else to sign for them?" he sputters. Oh, Mr. Baldwin, *you* said Mr. Ramsden, Mr. Baldwin, Sir, is essentially Steve's reply. "Oh, come on Mike," protests Alma, who's having a drink with her husband, "the lad was only doing what he was told!" Liz and Bet both watch with some disbelief at Steve's slipperiness as Mike relents and even offers to buy Steve a drink!

Vera pops into the bar to tell Jack she's concerned. She's just tried to ring Lisa in Blackpool and her father answered the phone and said Lisa didn't live there anymore before hanging up on her! Vera has immediately leaped to the least likely conclusion and wonders if this means that Lisa is headed back to Weatherfield to return to the Duckworths'! (Without even calling? But more about that in the epilogue.)

Bet goes into the back room, ostensibly to tell Vickie that Steve's gotten away without getting sacked, but really to have a heart-to-heart chat with her. She mentions Vickie's comment earlier that it was her best birthday ever. She's so happy to see Vickie having lots of fun. It's an age for having fun, and she had some when she was that age. Vickie giggles that she bets Bet was something. Oh, she was, confirms Bet. She had lots of fun. She had a baby and all. Vickie's naturally quite surprised at this revelation. Bet continues that then, of course, for some years, she didn't have any fun at all. Vickie asks what happened to the baby and Bet says gently that it's dead, but she won't tell her about that now, not on her happy day. She just wants to warn Vickie to be careful. Vickie assures Bet she knows all about babies and Bet corrects her. It's not just about babies and not having them until you're ready, she says. It's also about other kinds of damage.

Is Bet warning Vickie about Steve? Vickie wonders. But she used to defend Steve to Alec! Bet just says that she just heard Steve tell some very plausible lies out in the bar, and "I thought to meself, the lad's got a talent for it!" "Steve wouldn't lie to me," says Vickie. "Yes, he would. They all do - even the good ones," corrects Bet gently. They tell you you look wonderful when you look like a bundle of trash ready for the bin, she points out to a thoughtful Vickie. Her final word of warning to Victoria is not to park her brains under the bed - even if the rest of her wants to!

Ken has come by Deirdre's to talk to Tracy about her indiscretion and finds himself instead wading into even deeper muck. A tearful Deirdre tells him that Maggie has told Tracy about her and Baldwin's affair - in retaliation, is her clear interpretation - and now Tracy hates her. Tracy returns just then and in response to her mother's worried queries tells her not to tell her what to do anymore. Ken says this has got to stop - they must talk about it. Tracy replies that all they ever want to do is talk, talk, talk. "Don't ask me to talk to *her*," she says in a voice full of loathing before leaving the room.

In the Street, Des, Lisa and Tommy arrive. Of course Vera immediately runs into them walking back from the Rovers. She's thrilled that Lisa's back until the latter tells her she hasn't come back to the Duckworths', she's come back with Des. They're together now, she explains. "I love him and he loves me," she say. "Oh, no," despairs Vera softly. "Sorry, Vera," Lisa says gently. Vera stands in shock and silence as Des ushers his new family into his house.

ronniecat

Jeff Horton: DICKEN ASHWORTH Doreen Horton: ANNIE RAITT
Written by JOHN STEVENSON Directed by CHARLES LAUDER

Wednesday (3488, Monday 11 January 1993)

This episode opens at the Duckworths' home, where Vera is sadly staring at a framed picture of Lisa's and Terry's wedding. Suddenly "Lisa-Love" is nothing but a tart in Vera's estimation -- she could even tell that by the way Lisa crossed her legs at the Rover's! "What can we do, Jack?," Vera wonders, and Jack can only answer back that there's nothing to be done. Vera even tries to claim that "her Turry" were a respectable lad before Lisa came into his life, putting all of Terry's recent problems down to Lisa and her bad influence. "We're Tommy's grandparents," she moans to Jack -- "what sort of life will he have now?" She remarks that "the poor little lad" has had three different homes in four months, and Jack corrects her -- it's been four homes. Vera is suddenly seized by a bright idea: she'll quit her job, stay home, and look after little Tommy herself. "You can't do that," Jack responds -- Lisa is the child's mother, and Des would just call the police if Vera went around there, shouting the odds and demanding custody of her grandchild. Trying to find a bright side, Jack reminds her that at least Tommy is nearby now, so she can see him every day if she wants to, but Vera's not comforted by that.

Meanwhile the evil Des is bouncing little Tommy on his knee. Lisa comes down after finishing her shower, and Des tells her that Tommy is his "Little Mara" or mate. He knows Tommy likes being with him because he's smiling, but Lisa tells him it's more likely gas as she kisses both of them. Phyllis lets herself in, and her face freezes when she sees Des holding Tommy. She knows immediately what's going on, and only hopes that no one will get hurt. "Poor little mite," she says of Tommy, and with an expression of love on her face, wonders out loud what she's going to do with Des.

Outside, the traffic is crazy. A car pulls up and parks in front of the Kabin, but Rita rushes out and informs the driver that he'll have to park elsewhere as she's expecting a delivery any minute. Sally spends a few minutes waiting for a break in the traffic so that she can get across the road to talk to Kevin.

At the Corner Shop, Alf is off to a council meeting as well as a gardening center afterwards, and reminds Audrey to put out his "no parking" sign when he leaves. Before he gets a chance to go, Sally comes into the shop with Rosie and complains to Alf about the traffic -- it took her ages just to get across the road. Alf tells her there's nothing he can do, since he isn't in charge of traffic matters, but Sally asks him to at least bring the matter up in council.

Rita offers Vicky something to drink at the Rover's Return, but Vicky declines, as she and Bet are on their way to the back of the pub for lunch. Rita turns her attention to Raquel and asks her about Wayne. Raquel tells her that he nearly scored a goal during his last game, but he slipped and fell on the grass. He gave the groundskeeper an earful over that! Rita asks her if she enjoys going to the games, and Raquel admits that she does sometimes, although she doesn't enjoy the chanting. Rita thinks Raquel is referring to the chanting when the crowds are spurring the players on, but Raquel is talking about them yelling "Wayne, Wayne, go away!"

Phyllis arrives for a drink, bursting with the latest gossip about Des and Lisa, but the wind is taken out of her sails when Rita informs her that she already knows -- little else was discussed in the shop that morning. Raquel predicts that it won't last, and reinforces that by characterizing Des as being "a few crumbs short of a biscuit." Jack arrives back from the cellar in the middle of the gossip, and noticing that everyone has shut up, invites them to carry on with their conversation, since the Duckworths have always been the brunt of their jokes.

In the back of the pub, Bet asks Vicky about her plans -- she's clearly bored because Steve has to work during the day, and she'll be heading back to school on Friday. Bet offers her some money to shop for school things, but Vicky tells her that Alec already gave her enough for all her needs. Bet is obviously surprised by Alec's unusual largesse, and asks if he's settled in at Southampton. "Has he made any friends?" "One or two," is Vicky's reply, although she doesn't give any details as to the gender of his "pals." Bet is of the opinion that he'll be back in Weatherfield before long. Vicky looks surprised at this revelation, and Bet goes on to point out that Weatherfield is where his friends live. When she asks what Alec's pals in Southampton are like, Vicky only offers vaguely that they're "alright." Sensing that the conversation is making Vicky uncomfortable, Bet goes back to work in the pub.

Back at the Corner Shop, Audrey complains about how much time it's taking Alf to get back from the gardening center, but no sooner does she say it than a honking horn announces that Alf is outside. Deirdre remarks that he'll want the "no parking" sign moved, but Audrey's in no hurry. When Deirdre offers to go and move it, after more insistent honking, Audrey finally goes out. On the street, Alf barks at a motorist behind him, who is leaning on his horn while Audrey moves the sign. Alf backs his car to parallel park in front of the shop, Audrey steps out to avoid being bumped by the car, and is immediately clipped by an oncoming vehicle. Alf calls out her name, and in an instant Audrey is lying unconscious on the cobbles. Kevin and Doug rush over to help, and while Kevin covers Audrey with his jacket, Doug runs off to call an ambulance.

In the next scene, we find Phyllis asking who caused the accident, while police question the motorist who hit Audrey. Audrey, meanwhile, sits in the back of the ambulance, her neck braced. When Alf asks if he can hold her hand, she moans in pain.

Another quick cut, and I assume that Audrey is on her way to the hospital. Now we're at MVB Motors, where Doug and Kevin assess a car just brought in for resale. When Steve arrives, they tease him that Baldwin is on the warpath, since he couldn't find Steve when he left the garage, but when they realize that Steve isn't taking the bait, they agree that the car would be perfect for him, especially since it only costs £500. Steve can afford the car, but not the insurance. The cheapest quote was for £800 a year!

Ken arrives at the Corner Shop and finds Deirdre on the telephone with Alf. Audrey has a fractured wrist and won't be able to work for a few weeks. Deirdre tells Ken that Alf has offered to give Tracy part-time employment to fill in for Audrey, but she knows that Tracy wouldn't work with her -- "she hates me, Ken." Ken offers to talk to Tracy, but Deirdre doesn't think it will do any good. She wouldn't speak to Deirdre through breakfast, and left for school without saying a word.

Back at the garage, Kevin tells Doug that it's time to go home. Vicky arrives, looking for Steve, but no one seems to know where he is. Sally comes by to talk to Kevin, and tells him that Audrey broke her wrist in the accident. Doug is of the opinion that it couldn't have happened to a better person, and when Sally accuses him of being callous, he explains that he merely meant that since Audrey is married to a councillor, maybe Alf will finally try to do something about the volume of traffic. Sally doesn't think Audrey's injuries will make any difference, since when she spoke to Alf about the traffic earlier in the day, he didn't seem to give a toss.

Lisa hugs Des, who has finally arrived home from work, and tells him that she had a rotten and long day, locked in the house. She was afraid that if she went out, she might bump into Vera or one of her mates. "They think I'm a hussy," she sadly tells Des. Des disagrees, and believes that others on the street will sympathize with her. In any event, he knows that things will get better, and since there's no time like the present, he offers to take Lisa across to the pub for a drink. "What about Tommy?" Lisa asks, and Des suddenly realizes that having a baby in the house will change everything. Since they can't get a sitter on such short notice, Des decides to go to the Rover's for one pint, just to stare down the gossip mongers.

Steve arrives for Vicky and asks her if she's planning to spend her next school break in Southampton. Vicky teases him by wondering if that's what he wants, but Steve is eager to have her back in Weatherfield. Vicky tells him that she saw the car at MVB Motors, and Steve promises that the next time she visits, he'll have wheels.

Meanwhile, in the pub, Derek whitters on to Mavis about his concern of being caught in the "cross-fire" between Vera and Des, so when he sees Des come into the pub, he decides to ignore him. Raquel is alarmed when she sees Des, and asks Jack if he's going to hit him. While others watch, Jack goes to Des' table, but before Jack can utter a word, Des defends himself by pointing out that he didn't cause the split between Lisa and Terry. A calm Jack nods in agreement and merely asks that Des take good care of Lisa and the baby. He also thinks that in time, Vera will come around, but no sooner are the words out of Jack's mouth than Vera arrives and begins screamings at Des that he's in "big trouble." While Jack tries to calm his wife, Vera rants at Des, calling him "scum" among other things. To keep the peace, Bet asks Des to "drink up" and leave.

Deirdre answers her door to find Sally there, and lets her in before rushing back to the telephone, where she has been talking to one of Tracy's school chums. Tracy is hours late coming home, and Deirdre is crazy with worry. Sally tells her of some of the antics she got up to while she was at school, little realizing how concerned it made her mother, but Deirdre won't be comforted. She's called everyone she can think of, and no one has seen Tracy.

Des returns from the pub, and fudging the truth just a trifle, tells Lisa that everything went well at the Rover's Return. He tries to lift her spirits by telling her that Kevin said that Sally wants Lisa to drop by anytime she'd like to chat. He admits that Jack was very civilized about the whole thing, but that Vera was "upset." He's certain, though, that Jack will be able to talk her around. A troubled Lisa wonders if folk will ever accept them, and while Des assures her that he's sure that will happen, his expression doesn't back his words.

Tracy finally gets home, and when Deirdre angrily asks her where she's been, Tracy informs her that it's none of her business. Deirdre asserts that it is her business -- she's been going out of her mind for the past few hours, wondering what might have happened to her. "You don't half over-react," is Tracy's sarcastic response, and putting her foot down, Deirdre informs her that from here on in, Tracy will tell her where she's going, what she's going to be doing, and when she'll be home. "Did you tell me dad?" Tracy asks, referring to Deirdre's affair with Mike Baldwin. "Did you tell him you were at a Tupperware party when you were in bed with Mike Baldwin? I bet you told him a pack of lies." When she calls Deirdre "a rotten cowy tart," Deirdre slaps her face.

Heather Morlan

Written by PHIL WOODS Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Thursday (3489, Wednesday 13 January 1993)

Deirdre tries to apologize to Tracy for slapping her the night before though she believes she had good reason. Tracy oozes contempt and resentment and typically of a teenager with attitude, replies to her mother with grunts, one words, avoidance of eye contact and hissing accusations. Deirdre demands an apology from her daughter for calling her a tart and insists she knows nothing about the situation at the time. Tracy huffs and then reluctantly rolls her eyes and says "If you aren't a tart then i apologize", voice dripping with sarcasm and the words "But I still think you are" hanging in the air unspoken and she makes her escape to school.

Lisa and Phyllis chat while waiting for a break in the traffic (or at least Phyllis must want to cross over because Lisa soon ends up at the Kabin which is on the same side of the street as Des's house.) Anyway Lisa finds out from Phyllis that Des didn't tell her the whole truth about the row in the pub. Phyllis implies it was an all out slanging match between Vera, Jack and Des though, she says regretfully, no violence. She likes to see a bit of that, she chuckles, sat back with her feet up watching people bash each other on the telly! She lets slip that others are talking about her and quickly changes the subject to furniture polish.

Rita looks bored to tears while Mavis peers out between the blinds up the road and witters on about having to take sides. Des is a neighbour but the Duckworth's are long standing acquaintances. But she doesn't approve of Des and Lisa's behaviour and feels bad for Terry having lost his wife like that. Still she can't condone Terry's violence and... Ooops, here comes Lisa so Mavis hurries back to the counter and beseeches *Rita* to change the subject! As if Rita had any contribution to the prior subject LOL! You know you can't open a door like that without expecting Rita to walk through so she does and when Lisa enters, Rita loudly asks Mavis how Derek's hernia is! Lisa knows darn well she was probably the subject of conversation but apologizes to Mavis in case the baby kept her and Derek awake. Rita is sympathetic to Lisa's plight, fending off the opinionated, and Lisa, with a pointed look in Mavis' direction, acknowledges that people are talking about her just not to her face. Mavis, flustered and shuffling a bit lies that she wasn't talking about Lisa behind her back but doesn't think Lisa should expect approval for her behaviour either. OOOH, Lisa whistles, she hasn't had anyone tell her than since a teacher at school. Mavis sniffs that perhaps he should have said it more often and takes her morals into the back room.

Alf chuckles conspiratorially as he selects some grapes as a gift for Audrey. It's his revenge for her making him eat so many when he was sick while she feasted under his nose on succulent roast pork. Deirdre thinks Alf is being petty but Alf is just too tickled with himself. Ken stops in just as Alf heads over to the Kabin for gift wrap. Deirdre tells Ken about the incident with Tracy the night before and Ken even thinks it was somewhat justified. Deirdre wonders if it might not be time for Ken to have a word with Tracy since she is clearly the enemy while his reputation remains unsullied. He realizes she wants him to tarnish his own image a bit and take some of the blame for her affair with Mike and bitterness rears its ugly head once more. He's obviously never got over her betrayal though in my opinion they're pretty much on even ground now. Ken's very good at holding a grudge though and agrees it does take two, one to start it but yes, it takes two. Disgusted, Deirdre tells him not to bother, she'll deal with Tracy on her own but Ken feels though the wound is still there, (oh get over it, it's been 10 years almost!) he is on her side in this.

Lisa knocks on the door of Number 9 and asks Jack if she can come in. With an awkward look up and down the street to see if anyone is looking, he allows it but she refuses, only wanting to see if he would or not. She confronts him about the row in the pub last night but he tells her he was civil to Des, it was only Vera that shouted, whatever she's heard. Lisa tells Jack that she's only across the road and won't stop Vera from seeing Tommy but she and Vera need to talk first and tells Jack she'll be back over tonight.

Vicky needs the yellow pages on a mysterious quest. Denise pops across to the pub for lunch and turns down Doug's invitation to a proper lunch because she doesn't want to date a man chained to the Receiver general. Ow. Kevin arrives to ask Alf where Sally can send the petition she's got up about the traffic problem but Alf doesn't want to get involved, it's not his department.

But Ken is having a word with Tracy in spite of what Deirdre wanted. They chat as they walk the school grounds about her feelings about how her mother treated him during the affair and when he wanted to come back after breaking up with Wendy. She's single minded and even though he tries to get her to see that it's all water under the bridge she never strays from her focus. Tracy feels he wouldn't have gone to Wendy if Deirdre hadn't betrayed him first but he can't really say that's true or not (course he can't! According to my 35th anniversary book he had an affair on Deirdre before Mike but you never hear about that do you!) He tries to be impartial but can't and the truth does get warped in his favour when he says Deirdre didn't leave in the end but he did. I remember it differently. He did kick Deirdre out but when she couldn't go and asked to come back, he said all right. Equally, Deirdre kicked him out and he left and ended up with Wendy and only asked to come back after he left Wendy. Anyway. That's semantics at this point. What he should have told Tracy was that Tracy has no idea what it's like to be married and has no idea of how the ins and outs of marriage work. What he does try to do is shift the blame to Mike saying he basically seduced Deirdre who was fool enough to fall for it. He admits he was hurt deeply but tries to smooth it over by saying who knows what would have happened if they had done things differently. I think he left reinforced Tracy's resentment instead of tempering it.

Vicky's earlier task is revealed. She gives Steve the keys to the Escort that Kevin was selling and tells him he gets to buy the car. She's insuring it for him (to the tune of £750!) He balks at this but she justifies it by saying that the money is from Saracen's sale and she's exchanging four hoofs for four wheels and it doesn't take much for him to be persuaded. In another scene shortly after, Bet is aghast at Vicky's gesture though slightly mollified when Vicky says she's only insured it, not bought the car. That's not so bad then, Bet was afraid she'd lashed out hundreds. She did but Vicky and Steve don't bother correcting her impression. She warns Steve to drive carefully and take good care of Vicky. He cheekily offers that he will, he's got to take care of the 'golden goose' after all and he squeals the tires on his way down the street. (can you squeal tires on cobbles?)

Audrey visits the shop for a bit more sympathy than she's getting from Alf, carefully cradling her arm in its cast. She tells Deirdre she had a painful night just as Alf comes in with a little gift for his poor injured wife. She's delighted and hopes it's something she's had her heart set on.... grapes! Alf's face falls faster than his little vengeance plan when the gift is opened and Audrey squeals over the grapes that were wrapped and bowed so nicely. She even offers him one but he scuffles glumly to the storeroom while Audrey winks and whispers thanks to Deirdre for the tip off!

Sally brings her impressively worded petition to the Kabin. Vera is mystified why all those words are needed when all you really need is something that says Fix the Traffic. But Rita signs it and Vera agrees to as well until she sees Lisa's name on the list and goes off in a ranting rage about that Slut!

Ken meets Deirdre in the pub to talk about Tracy but starts off on the wrong foot when he says he's happier now that he's got someone special. For some reason, this seems to unsettle Deirdre where you almost thought she was jealous for some strange reason. Well that's the impression i got. Anyway, she goes on to blame that someone special for adding to the usual teenage angst by giving Tracy a big stick to further beat up her mother with. Ken snipes that she should have thought of that before she slept with Mike Baldwin. Oh that was low!!! Deirdre thinks so too and glares at him and wordlessly gets up and leaves. Ken scrambles to catch up, bleating he didn't mean it (Oh yes you did you arse****!!!!) Over in the corner Bet observes that the couple could almost assume to be married and she and Alf and Audrey chat about marriage and other related celebrations benefiting pub profits. Idle chit chat.

Vera rants about Jack about that Slut even though Jack tries to calm her down. She won't be told though and blathers on about Lisa being an unfit mother and quitting Bettabuys to look after the baby herself. On and on until Jack momentarily shuts her up by telling her that she's lost Tommy with that attitude. It doesn't seem to have had any effect because when Lisa comes over she lays into her daughter in law again, with Slut flung far and wide. Lisa finally shouts that she's going to have her say too. She says she didn't do anything with Des until after Terry had him done over and not even then right away. But Terry killed their love with the violence. She tells Vera she is ashamed of Terry but that she can see Tommy any time. Don't you see, Vera cries, this will be the end of Terry. She's desperately afraid but Lisa and Jack don't understand. Terry will be out of prison before long and can start a new life. No, Vera howls, After what Lisa's done to him, he'll come out and go straight back in ....for murder!!!!

And in Vera's eyes and given Terry's history, it's not unfounded.

Diane Johnston

Written by STEPHEN MALLATRATT Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Friday (3490, Friday 15 January 1993)

Traffic on the Street is increasingly worrisome. Sally struggles to get across with little David while Kevin waits with Rosie on their side of the street. A pickup truck (or is it "pickup lorry"?) stops to let her pass but to Sally's annoyance, as it drives on, its occupants, tradesmen, offer wolf whistles to the young mother. She dismisses them as "pigs" but Kevin finds the scene amusing. She complains to him about the traffic and once again mentions her petition. Kevin tells her she'll need luck to get the council to take any notice but Sally states she is determined to get action on the issue. Once he hands Rosie back to her, he heads for the garage, stopping to remark with a grin that he hasn't got her "knack" for crossing the street!

Lisa steps out in her robe to fetch in the milk and seeing Derek departing for work, offers him a cheery "good morning". Derek treats her rudely - barely acknowledging her greeting, he goes on his way. Deflated, Lisa returns inside to tell Des she isn't sure she's done the right thing, moving in with him. He tries to be encouraging, telling her Derek isn't "typical" and, he points out, Vera's already said her worst. Lisa, recalling Vera's prediction, expresses her fear that it will come true, but Des tries to ease her mind by saying they'll face that when they come to it. With optimism he reminds her that they have nowhere to go but up!

Over at the Duckworths', Vera shows Jack a letter that's just arrived in the post. Forwarded by the Hortons in Blackpool, it's addressed to Lisa and it's from "R Turry". She wonders what to do with it as she has no intention of giving it to Lisa. Jack thinks it's best to leave it until she's had time to think about it but Vera's larger concern is how Terry will take the news of Lisa and Des being together. Jack offers that he's sure she'll find a way to tell him and they agree it's better in person than by letter. Vera expects Jack to be with her when she goes to see him but Jack begs off, saying his presence would only set Terry off and that she's the one to handle it. He cautions that it may be better to wait in any case, as Terry's reaction to the news could jeopardize his chances of getting parole. Vera laments her son's situation and then turns on Jack, saying if he was "a normal dad" he'd have thumped Des Barnes! "That would be a fine thing!" he says. "I'd end up sharing a cell with R Terry!"

Vicky is getting ready to head back to school now that Christmas break is over. Steve will be driving her, she informs Bet, he has to make a delivery of t-shirts to Leeds anyway. Anxious for a word with Vicky in private, Bet drops a hint for Raquel to get started in the pub. Taking her cue, Raquel abandons the parlour and leaves them to talk. Bet attempts some subtle inquiries concerning Alec but Vicky is evasive, lightly turning the subject to her friends at school, or all the packing she has left to do. As she goes upstairs, Bet's face betrays her gut feeling - Vicky knows more than she's letting on.

In the Corner Shop, Alf is chattering away, freely dispensing wisdom to Deirdre on the subject of Tracy and her shenanigans. Deirdre looks beleaguered but too fed-up to protest. When Lisa comes in for some nappies, Deirdre is relieved at the interruption and happily goes to serve her. Alf turns his attentions to Lisa, saying something meant to be friendly but sounding rather stiff and judgemental. Lisa ignores his remark, thanks Deirdre for the nappies and goes. (A package of 48 Pampers cost £6.80 in Alf's shop in 1993, by the way.) As the door closes, Alf tells Deirdre he doesn't know how "some folk" have the "gall to appear in public". Deirdre answers curtly that *she* was glad to see Lisa!

Alf isn't the only one who's talking about Lisa. In the pub, Mavis and Audreh are sharing their feelings with Jack who is evidently on a quick break, as he sits across from them. As they speak in hushed tones about the "nerve" displayed by Des and Lisa, Mavis informs them conspiratorially that Des came into the Kabin this morning, "as bold as brass"! Jack, as he stands up to clear a tray, doesn't add much beyond confirming their speculation that Vera must be taking it hard.

At the bar, Steve stands chatting with Kevin while he waits for Vicky. Kevin asks if Baldwin knows about Steve combining "business with pleasure", (taking Vicky back to her school while making the delivery in Leeds) and he answers in the affirmative, asserting that "me and Mike are like this" (twisting his fingers round each other). Kevin laughs at the notion but as Vicky and Bet emerge with the baggage, gives Steve his assurance that he'll say nothing.

Bet escorts the young couple to the curb where Steve's car is at the ready, cautioning him to "drive carefully, Rhett". She and Vicky exchange hugs and Bet takes the final opportunity to ask if Vicky has "anything" she wants to tell her. Casting her eyes downward, Vicky shakes her head, confirming Bet's suspicions. "I thought so - he has a woman, doesn't he?" she asks quietly. Vicky feels terrible for Bet having found out and apologizes, saying she didn't want to tell her. "You didn't Petal, I guessed", Bet says softly. Voicing her suspicions, she asks if by any chance the woman's name is "Cherie". (You remember Cherie, don't you? She's the woman Alec met during the cruise he took Christmas 1991, infuriating Bet later on when she learned he passed himself off to Cherie as a widower!) No, Vicky says, that isn't her name. Just the same, she hastens to tell Bet that she doesn't believe it's a romantic involvement - as far as she knows, they are only friends. Bet assures her that it's okay - "Everything - is okay", and Vicky goes off with Steve, leaving Bet to ponder whether everything really is "okay".

As she later tells Rita, it isn't that she's jealous, or even feeling a sense of betrayal. She's just "annoyed" that he's getting on with his life, she admits. Rita makes no bones about the fact that she doesn't like Alec and never has, saying she only "tolerated" him while they were married. "In my opinion, you're well shut of him", she tells Bet. "I'll drink to that!" Bet says with newfound cheer. (This remark by Rita contradicts the future storyline that has her and Alec forging a relationship - circa 1998 - based on the "mutual fondness" they have always shared!)

Tracy stops in the Corner Shop after school to inform her mother she is going to Debbie's. When Deirdre cautions her not to be late and to "behave", she can't resist mouthing off yet again. "So, it's do as I say, not as I do!" (Oh the little charmer - who thinks she should have been slapped just a bit harder?) Deirdre explodes in anger, saying she's taken all she intends to, that Tracy had better watch her step. Mid-blast, Audreh enters the shop and sensing something is up, starts wibbling something silly about Alf. Unwilling to carry on the argument in front of Audreh, Deirdre dismisses Tracy, but Tracy turns to have the last word. As she leaves in a snit, Audreh gives her hollow laugh and angles to know what "all that" was about. Deirdre reels to rebuke her: "I don't answer to her and I certainly don't answer to you!"

By the time Alf arrives back at the shop, Deirdre is getting ready to go home at the end of her trying day. As he enters, he remarks absently that Tracy's boss is outside, sending Deirdre into another fury. She flies out the door to confront Maggie, accusing her of turning Tracy against her. Maggie responds in kind, charging that Deirdre is responsible for the fact that Mark now knows who is real father is. Ken is characteristically cool, as he approaches to join Maggie in the van, he abstains from involving himself in the dispute. When Deirdre turns to him with a plea that he have a talk with Tracy as the situation has really become unlivable for her, he casually tells her he has to go - they have a table booked! As the van pulls away, Deirdre chokes back tears, alone and desolate.

On his way out to play snooker for the evening, Jack recoils when he sees that Vera has opened R Turry's letter to Lisa. Over his objections, she laments Terry's anguish, apparently having begged for Lisa to give him another chance. Though Jack tries to calm her, Vera is inconsolable, feverishly threatening to go across and ram the letter down the "slut's" throat!

When Alf tries to have a quiet drink in the pub, he is cornered by Mavis and Derek, demanding that he do something about the fact that they are caught in a "war zone". He tells them there is nothing he can do about the situation between the Duckworths and Des Barnes, and gets up to move away from them. As they leave in disgust, Sally approaches Alf, wanting help in presenting her petition to the town council. Again, Alf is behooved to explain that it's nothing to do with him, telling Sally that Harry Potts is the man to see. Derek makes a snide remark about Alf "passing the buck" again and as the Wiltons exit the Rovers, Mavis gives him a congratulatory pat for being so clever.

Their amusement is short-lived as they look across in horror to see Vera Duckworth noisily banging and shouting at Des' door, Jack in tow and carrying his snooker cue which the Wiltons must take for a weapon!

When Des finally opens the door, he allows them admittance on the provision that they say their piece and leave promptly. Vera notices the preparations for their trip and accuses Des of trying to sneak Tommy away. Des answers flatly that it's not her business but Vera responds indignantly, "That baby is my business - R Turry is still his father!" Lisa comes down the stairs and is met with abuse from Vera, who again calls her a slut as she waves the letter at her, "Written in BLOOD - R Turry's blood!" Lisa calmly answers that she doesn't want the letter and continues on with her ironing. Vera, who is by now hysterical, flings the letter at Lisa before Des informs her that their time is up and ushers them from the house. Bitterly, Vera warns him to "think on", that taking a baby out of the country is illegal! "Yeah - so is opening other people's mail!" he answers flippantly as he shuts the door behind them.

Alone with her again, Des goes over to comfort Lisa, telling her she "played a blinder". By this time she's reading the letter and tells Des of Terry's appeal for them to make a fresh start. In despair she admits to Des that she can't see they have any future here at all. Agreeing that the situation is impossible, he soothes her. As soon as they get back from Hartlepool, the house goes up for sale and they move away, as far as they can get!

Anita Bélanger

Written by TOM ELLIOT Directed by BRIAN MILLS


Originally transmitted: 18, 20, 22, 25 & 27 January 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 28 February - Friday 3 March 2000
Episode Numbers: 3491 - 3495

Monday (3491, Monday 18 January 1993)

Sally's getting ready to present her petition. Kevin offers to call town hall too as it might help, but Sally is rightly offended that he thinks he'd be paid attention to because he's a man whereas she might be brushed off as a hysterical female. They won't think that once she's done with them, she predicts.

Audrey is back on duty in the shop, casted wrist encased in a floral scarf instead of a clinical sling. Phyllis comes in for a loaf. Audrey gets right to the point and asks after Des and Lisa's weekend away, thinking it will give Vera's blood pressure a chance to settle down. Phyllis is prickly about the whole subject and seems torn between disapproval and her doting feelings for her Desmond and for once, refuses to gossip and even takes umbrage at Audrey's gossiping about Des. Even Deirdre, who is really talking about a different situation, reckons that it's best to say nowt. There's enough lives turned upside down by a word in the wrong place.

Indeed.

Mike is off to a business meeting in Birmingham. Alma is just moaning about Monday mornings, not especially looking forward to Gail's eternal bubbling about her kids. Mike is still down in the mouth about not having any contact with his own kid.

Over in the Kabin, Mavis chats to Rita about Vera finding it difficult to see her own grandson and he's only across the road. Might as well be the other side of the world. Rita takes a phone call from Ted's solicitor who wants to see her. There's a date set for the hearing contesting the will. That just sets Rita in a worry for the rest of the morning, fretting and just wishing it was over. She fears she won't be up to it, the hearing that is. Sally arrives frustrated with being passed around from phone to phone at the Town Hall. Seems the person who is in charge of traffic is some Councilor Potts who doesn't even have a public "surgery" for nearly two weeks. But when Mavis hears the name, she reveals he's Derek's boss. Sally is delighted to have an "in" though Mavis doesn't think Derek will be much help as Potts is a thoroughly disagreeable and uncooperative soul. Sally however, is filled with renewed determination and asks Mavis to get Derek to put in a word for her so she can get a private audience.

Liz, Betty and Raquel chat amongst themselves and deduce Bet's quiet mood must be down to missing Vicky. Liz avers that Steve is missing her too. The conversation shifts to Des and Lisa with opposing points of view. Raquel doesn't know what Lisa is thinking hooking up with Des. Betty doesn't know if Des is missing the sense he was born with and feels sorry for Vera. Liz points out the obvious... What is Terry going to do when he finds out?

Nicky and mark pop into the cafe for a drink at dinnertime. Mark questions Nicky on what he knows about Mike Baldwin which isn't much except he drives a flash Jag and is loaded.

Just as Rita is away to the solicitor, Denise is in the Kabin buying a birthday card for her nephew. She's curious because Rita is distracted. Mavis only admits that Rita is seeing a solicitor about her late husband's will and Denise assumes all is well and Rita is left well provided for. Mavis doesn't contradict her.

At the solicitor's office, Rita finds out the hearing is in five weeks and dreads having to testify, be cross examined and having to hear Ted's and her good names being besmirched and living through it all over again. She really doesn't think she has the strength and wonders if she shouldn't just let the Brooks' have the lot. Which in fact, is what she tells Mavis that she's going to do. Mavis and Derek are concerned that Rita won't get her due as Ted had wanted. Rita knows and realizes she's going against Ted's wishes and anticipates it being the worst day of her life.

Mike arrives back from his trip early and stops in the caff but Alma's out with Audrey. To cap off Mike's less than successful day, Tracy rudely gives him a glare and the silent treatment when he greets her.

Doug encounters Denise in front of the corner shop. Not short of persistence, he perseveres and manages to get Denise to accept a date for a drink in the Rovers tomorrow night.

There's normal squabbling among the kids at the Platt residence just as Gail arrives home for tea. Mark and Nicky are playing a video game but Sarah wants to watch telly. Mark is invited to stay for tea but instructed to call his mother. After tea, it seems like Mark is lingering and Gail perceives that he is reluctant to go home though Nicky says Mark hasn't had a row with his mother or anything. Gail and Martin figure it must just be due to Mark being an only child and home is a quiet and somewhat lonely place.

Oh oh oh! Get ready for a heavy dose of teenage attitude and rebellion!!! Debbie and Tracy are in the living room with their music turned on loud. Deirdre enters shouting for them to turn it down but Tracy just ignores her mother pointedly. Deirdre proceeds to turn the player off altogether. The girls sigh and roll their eyes like long suffering teens do and get up to go upstairs but are stopped by Deirdre who sees that Debbie is holding and drinking from a can of lager that she brought from home. "Me mother lets me!" Too bad, chick, not in my house and you're only 16! Tracy gives Deirdre the lip and accuses her of hypocrisy "You drink it!!!" justifies Tracy, voice dripping with all the contempt a 16 year old can muster. Which is a lot! Deirdre confiscates the can an Tracy stares defiantly at her mother and takes a deep drink before handing it over. Then equally defiantly switches the loud music back on with an aggressive look and they go back upstairs. Couldn't you just smack them!

Sally humps a large basket of laundry into the kitchen and her lazy ass husband watches her go with a comment "You still not finished, then?" (You could help her!!!!) The doorbell rings so Kevin decides he could at least answer that and lets Ken into the front hall. Sally gasps and runs into the living room to whip the tablecloth out from under the newspaper and whisks it behind the kitchen door before smiling and greeting Ken whom she had wanted to talk to. (LOL that's like tossing the dirty dishes in the dishwasher or something else laying around into a closet isn't it!) Seems she was hoping Ken could give her an idea of how she could go about publicizing her campaign. Ken points her in the direction of a contact at the Gazette. Sally realizes that Ken too must know Harry Potts and tells him that Derek is going to have a word but Ken is as skeptical as Mavis was, given Potts' reputation.

And indeed in the pub, Derek worries about approaching Harry Potts for a favour. Mavis suggests that Derek makes it seem like he's doing Potts the favour but Derek doesn't see it will have any different outcome. Ken arrives at the pub for an anticipated drink. Deirdre and Emily, setting a stellar example for Miss Teen Contrariness 1993, come in for a drink as well. Deirdre and Ken trade sarcastic remarks over her confrontation with Maggy last week, speculating that neither woman will back down from her opinion so ken expects it will be handbags at 20 pages when next the two meet. He asks after Tracy but Deirdre just shrugs and says she'll cope with her on her own. Deirdre and Emily join Mavis and Derek and praise Derek for his voluntary intervention with Harry Potts on Sally's behalf. Eh? Poor Derek can't object once Deirdre offers names from her former council contacts and Emily praises him to the skies.

Maggy attempts to engage Mark in conversation as he's been a bit quiet since he came back from Nicky's. Mark finally reluctantly asks why Maggy never married Mike Baldwin. She tells him that that was between her and Mike and anyway it was for the best. Harry was there and was a wonderful father to Mark and wants to leave it at that. She asks Mark to forget Mike, it's for the best.

Diane Johnston

John Halpern: COLIN PROCKTER Debbie Dawson: JENNIE SIXSMITH
Written by BARRY HILL Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Tuesday (3492, Wednesday 20 January 1993)

Mike accompanies Alma into the Cafe, not noticing Mark Redmond sitting in the corner watching them. After Mike goes, Gail points Mark out to Alma and she gets to see this son of Mike's with her own eyes for the first time.

Tracy, getting ready for school, tells her mother matter-of-factly that she and Debbie are going out to a new club that night. Deirdre firmly tells her daughter that it's just not on, and this time it's not just her saying so, it's "the Queen, the Commons and the laws!" Tracy ignores her protests and says she'll change elsewhere after school and go straight there. Deirdre says she knows Tracy is trying to punish her, but doing this is a mistake. Tracy snaps in reply that if she wants advice about her life she won't ask Deirdre for it. "I'd ask Percy Sugden before I'd ask you!" (ouch!) "In fact - I'd ask Wendy Crozier [Ken's former mistress] before I'd ask you!" (OUCH!) With those shattering words, she walks out.

In the Kabin, Raquel is handing out free drinks tokens for the new nightclub - it seems it's a friend of Wayne's who's opening it. Mavis is dubious as to whether it's a "sweet sherry sort of a place". Raquel tries to reassure her that they have all sorts of drinks - but the inclusion in her listing of "blue drinks...yellow drinks" doesn't mollify Mavis any! Sally has entered the shop and Derek appears from the back with tea, and Sally takes the opportunity to accost him yet again about having a word with Councilor Potts on the traffic problems. Derek is so clearly reticent, Sally really appears to be either extremely rude to keep insisting or completely self-centered not to notice (ah, it would be the latter, then). As Derek flees to work, her parting words are to tell Potts she's having a reporter come round with a photographer to do a story - that'll please him, won't it? Once Derek's gone, Mavis scolds Sally that Potts is a really obnoxious man - "You're asking my Derek to put his head in the lion's mouth!" "Oh, no, Mavis," says Sally earnestly, "if I was going to ask someone to put his head in a lion's mouth it wouldn't be Derek - honestly!" LOL!

At the Rovers, Doug and Denise have a drink and discuss their date that evening. He's taking her to that glamourous new club, it seems. She gently but firmly tells him not to get his hopes up, it's just two friends going out for a drink.

At the bar, Percy tells Kevin he can't imagine why Sally hasn't been to him for advice on this traffic thing. (!) He's quite an expert, having been a "lollipop man" (crossing guard). Kev smiles to himself but says he understands Sal's got it under control, this Councilor Potts is going to be on the case. Percy scoffs that Potts is "neither use nor ornament" as Chair of the Traffic Committee - they call him "Jam Potts"! (Phyllis, listening in, guffaws a little too appreciatively at this until Percy's glare silences her.)

Derek is checking soap and paper towel levels in a school lavatory, clipboard in hand, looking for all the world like he's checking core temperatures in a nuclear reactor. He is also practicing his speech to Potts out loud to himself as he does so. To his mortification, Potts is in one of the stalls and overhears. Dirk denies hotly that he was talking to himself, but Potts assures him that some of the finest caretakers ever talked to themselves. Derek seizes the opportunity to note that Potts doesn't have to talk to *him*self - no, as an important man, his words are listened to and weighed. As Potts carefully combs his hair in the mirror, Derek goes on about how just that morning he was telling a poor young woman, one of Potts' constituents, how Councilor Potts could solve all her traffic flow problems. He goes on to mention that a reporter will be covering the story. "Will they be bringing a photographer?" asks Potts casually. Yes, Derek thinks they are. "You can tell her I'll be there," says Potts grandly before walking off. Derek smiles in triumph.

In the Cafe, Mark comes in again and this time approaches the counter. A flustered Alma rushes to the stoves and begs Gail to take over counter service, she'll dish up the beans instead. The baffled Gail understands when she sees Mark, and asks him what she can do for him. Mark isn't to be avoided, however, for what he wants is to speak to Alma. "I'll see," says Gail, and gives Alma the message. Alma nervously approaches the young man. "Hello," she says. "Hello...are you Alma?" Mark asks. "Yes." "I just wanted to say hello," says the young man politely but firmly, holding out his hand. "I'm Mark. I'm Mike's son." Alma shakes his outstretched hand as the pair quietly have a look each at the other.

Emily visits Deirdre to compare notes on the traffic issue in preparation for the reporter's visit tomorrow. Deirdre was hoping it was Tracy at the door, and tells Emily so. Emily mildly says that she's sure Tracy is just at some school chum's listening to records. Deirdre looks like she swallowed something that hurts.

The new nightclub is loud and full of smoke and coloured lights (NOT a Mavis and sweet sherry kind of place at all!) and filling with people. Debbie and Tracy clutch lager bottles and gawk. Tracy's changed all right - she's put her hair up and makeup on, and she's changed into a rather sophisticated-looking eighteen-year-old! Denise and Doug have just entered and Tracy brags to Debbie that she "knows that bloke" (Doug). It's all a bit loud and young for dubious Denise, but Doug convinces her to stay while he goes to the bar for drinks. Tracy and Debbie accost him there ("Tracy? Is that you?" asks Doug, who didn't recognize her on first glance) and try to convince him to buy them drinks. He says maybe later - clearly trying to avoid the issue - and returns to Denise. She's not too impressed that her order of a gin & tonic has transformed itself into a Mexican lager and a tub of gin jell-o! Doug says he thought maybe she'd like something different. She changes the subject to tease him about chatting up the two "toddlers" at the bar (if Denise has met Tracy she didn't recognize her). He asks hopefully if perhaps she's jealous but if so, she isn't letting on. Instead, she pokes dubiously at the lime wedge in the neck of her lager bottle as he again encourages her to give it a try.

Alma's gone to the Rovers for a drink and a think instead of going home for her and Mike's planned wine-and-video night in. Sally approaches her and witters on and on about this and that while the distracted Alma barely responds. When Raquel stops by picking up glasses and she and Sally chat for a minute, Alma takes the opportunity to slip off and join Ken, asking for a word. They get a booth so they can talk.

Derek and Mavis arrive to meet Sally. Derek is flush with victory and Sally buys him a drink in thanks. Mavis says she's not looking forward to meeting Potts, according to Derek he's a bit of an ogre! Derek impishly tells Sally he wouldn't say "ogre", but she might want to lock up the children before meeting with him! (This crack is about as hilarious as Derek gets on purpose, so he must have been feeling really pleased with himself.)

Alma tells Ken that Mark knows about Mike. (How's that for a soap opera sentence?) Ken confirms that he knew this. Alma begs Ken to tell her who told Mark - specifically, was it Mike? Ken is bitter that she's asking him to defend "Baldwin". "Don't call him 'Baldwin'," she says, imitating his way of spitting the word out. "*My* name's Baldwin now." Ken finally admits it was not Mike who spilled the beans to Mark, but stops short of saying who did. Does that make her feel any better? Sadly, Alma says that she thought it would - but it doesn't.

Right then, Mike is on the phone at his flat looking for Alma. He calls Gail, who says that Alma's gone to the Rovers, but doesn't get involved further by responding to his questions as to why.

Back at the nightclub, Doug is trying to convince Denise to dance. She says the place makes her feel a million years old. (And why wouldn't it? She's acting as if she is.) He offers to take her home, but she insists he stay - he's obviously enjoying himself, but she's not. He finally begs that he just wanted to talk to her. He only brought her here 'cause he's skint, and it's free! He doesn't like the place any more than she does. He doesn't have to be so gallant about it, protests Denise (gallant? telling her he only brought her here 'cause it's free??). It sounds like *she's* the one trying to be gallant when she says they're just different people and have different tastes, that's all. He's a good bloke, she concludes, "and we must *never* do this again sometime!" She leaves and Doug grabs his jacket and tries to pursue her through the now-packed club. He's intercepted by a drunken Tracy, who stumbles into his arms, muttering that she's got no-one to dance with and she feels sick. Debbie, also drunk, cheerfully asks Doug to look after Tracy, as Debbie's met a guy and she's going off to have a snog with him, y'know! Denise turns at the door of the club to see Doug standing with one of the "toddlers" from earlier already in his arms. Doug helplessly watches her turn again and go as Tracy qualifies, "Real sick. Very very sick." "Come on," says Doug resignedly, "I'll take you home."

Back at the Rovers, Alma is saying that if she and Maggie and Ken all want Mike to stay away from Mark, surely they can stop him. Ken doesn't understand why Alma would want that as much as they do. Alma admits that the reason is that connecting with Mark is what Mike wants more than anything in the world - and what will happen to Alma? "You know, he's got so little love to give, Ken," she says, poignantly. She's just scared there won't be anything left for her. She's terrified of what will happen if Mike finds out Mark knows - they both know what he's like. She asks if Ken and Maggie are serious. Yes, admits Ken, but it's nothing Mike can't tear to pieces if he wanted to. Alma grasps Ken's hands in sympathy and leans across the table, saying she's just not going to tell Mike - she just wishes it would all go away - and looks up to see Mike glaring at them, their hands still clasped across the table.

Alma pulls her hands away and sits back quickly. "I'll be waiting in the car," snaps Mike before stalking out, a miserable Alma close behind.

Doug delivers Tracy to her mother's door. "She's been drinking," he explains to Deirdre. "I can see that!" says Deirdre, adding "who put her up to this?" (Put her up to it? Please! Has she completely forgotten the past week?) As a shocked Emily looks on, Tracy drunkenly declares that she wants to be with Doug and complains that she didn't get her kiss; she plants one on Doug's lips. "I think you should get her upstairs," says a disgusted Doug, "and I also think you shouldn't let her go out boozing until she's older!" "I BEG your PARDON?" says Deirdre, outraged, but Doug's already gratefully fled. Embarrassed Emily is close behind, muttering that she'd better leave and saying something about the shock. "Wot shock?" slurs Tracy. "You don't mean you told Auntie Emily that you slept with Mike Baldwin!" Thank goodness the door has already closed behind Emily, but just barely. Deirdre orders Tracy to her room. "Don't ask me if you can go out again!" she says furiously. "Didn't ask you tonight, did I?" points out Tracy. She accuses Deirdre of wanting Doug all to herself and says he's a lovely dancer before stumbling upstairs with the words "Nightie-night, God bless!" (The childlike words are a masterful touch, chilling juxtaposed with Tracy's smeared makeup, drunken behavior and unconcealed loathing for her mother.)

Mike and Alma arrive home. He's furious that they'd made plans, then she went off and had a drink with Barlow - "Barlow, of all people!" "His name is Ken," she says, nicely playing off her earlier similar admonishment to Ken. "Oh, his name is Ken, is it?" sneers Mike sarcastically, viciously opening a bottle of wine. "I saw your son today, Mike," Alma says quietly, stopping him in his tracks. "You know he looks like you, a bit." Mike is riveted, demanding details, where? when? Did she talk to him? Did he look well? Did she find out anything about him? Not really, says Alma. "He's very polite, very well-brought-up." "'Course he is!" says Mike proudly, grinning from ear to ear. "You didn't bring him up, Mike," Alma points out. "He knows who you are. He was looking for you," she finally confesses. "Mark knows you're his father." Mike is gobsmacked. Has Maggie finally told him after all these years? Alma replies she doesn't know *how* he knows, but he knows. "It's brilliant!" declares Mike, oblivious to Alma's trepidation. "Brilliant!" He pours wine for them and proposes a toast - "to fatherhood!" "To fatherhood," repeats Alma much, much more quietly.

Top honours tonight go to a young Dawn Acton for her portrayal of a drunken Tracy Barlow. I've often heard it said by people "in the biz" that acting drunk convincingly is the toughest challenge to the actor. If so, Ms Acton carried it off superbly in today's episode, resisting the urge to over-act (particularly common in young actors with little or no experience with alcohol) and giving a brilliant performance as a drunk, angry teenager. Brian Hibbard as the hapless Doug was great too, with the perfect combination of awkwardness, frustration, embarrassment and the undeniable urge to "do the right thing" by poor Tracy even though it could spell trouble for him.

ronniecat

Harry Potts: RUSSELL DIXON Debbie Dawson: JENNY SIXSMITH
Written by FRANK COTTRELL BOYCE Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Wednesday (3493, Friday 22 January 1993)

Another busy street scene as traffic rushes back and forth on the cobbles. Inside No. 1, Deirdre calls Tracy, telling her she'll be late for school. A hung-over Tracy finally appears at the top of the stairs, still in her night clothes, only to tell her mom that she feels rotten and isn't going to school. Deirdre isn't surprised -- when she finally got home, she was "paralytic," and she wants to know what Doug Murray had to do with all of it. Tracy's only response is that she feels sick and is going back to bed.

At the Baldwins', Mike offers to run Alma to the Cafe, but she's just as happy to take the bus since she's obviously still upset over the situation with Mark. Mike realizes that Alma is trying to avoid the subject, so tries to make her see that it was only a matter of time before she'd have learned of Mark's existence. Alma wonders if he has any more surprises to spring on her.

In the Kabin, Liz confides to Rita that she's in search of some moral support. She's seriously thinking of making an appointment with Denise to have a complete make-over, including a new hairdo, but Mavis is opposed to Liz having her "lovely hair" cut. Rita suggests that if Liz needs an ego boost, she ought to do what Mavis has planned -- lunch with two fellows! Mavis is quick to inform Liz that it's only lunch in the Rovers with Derek and Councillor Potts, Derek's boss. Potts isn't Derek's favourite person, but he has to make an effort in order to bring the situation with the traffic to Potts' attention.

Sally finds Percy at her door, and invites him in. He asks about her campaign regarding the traffic build-up on Coronation Street, and Sally tells him that she'll be giving Potts her petition during a lunch meeting. Percy humbly submits that in his opinion, he should be in attendance too -- after all, he used to work on the street as a lollipop man, so he knows better than most about the increase in traffic. In fact, he's quite willing to do a traffic count that morning to prove that the traffic has increased significantly. Sally feels she couldn't possibly expect Percy to sit out in the cold just to count cars, but Percy is adamant that it wouldn't be a hardship. Sally kisses him in gratitude as Percy confides that it's nice to be included rather than being told to mind his own business.

During a lull in business, Alma goes on (again) about her difficulties with Mike over the latest revelation that he has a son. She feels small-minded because she's jealous that Mike has a child by another woman, especially when she knows that she can't provide him with one herself. Gail thinks her problem has more to do with insecurity than with jealousy, and if Alma is insecure in her marriage, that's more down to Mike.

Tracy finally manages to crawl out of bed and get dressed, and is surprised to find her mother waiting in the living room rather than working at the Corner Shop. Deirdre stayed home because she wants some answers about the night before, but all Tracy has to offer is that she went out with her mate -- "BIG DEAL." Deirdre isn't satisfied with the short version, and in particular wants to know Doug's role, so Tracy tells her about the promotion for the new bar. Debbie's boyfriend was the D.J., and he asked them to go. She had a few drinks and just happened to meet Doug there. Tracy lies by telling her mom that Doug asked her to dance, and when Deirdre asks her if Doug bought her any drinks, Tracy answers in a way that implies that he did. Deirdre angrily reminds her that she's under-aged to drink, and when Tracy implies that Deirdre probably did the same thing when she was young, Deirdre argues that the strongest thing she drank then was a shandy. "You might have been a little angel then, but you certainly made up for it later," Tracy quips, causing Deirdre to caution her not to force her to raise a hand to her again. "Why not?" Tracy fires back. "You smashed up my life when you went to bed with your boyfriend. Why worry about hurting me now?"

Mike is pleased to see a new customer in a flash car pull out of MVB motors just as he arrives. He sees the increased traffic on the street as a bonus, since it's bringing new clientelle into the shop, and gives Kevin a hard time about Sally's attempts to get things back to normal. Kevin tells him that maybe if he had kids living on the street, he'd feel differently about things. Deirdre comes charging across the street, blood in her eyes, and when she informs Doug that she "wants a word," Kevin makes himself scarce. Doug offers to make Deirdre a cup of tea, but she's having none of it. Instead she demands to know what went on last night between Doug and her daughter. Contrary to what Tracy told Deirdre, Doug assures her that Tracy was drunk when he first encountered her. She was clearly "out of her depth," so all Doug did was prop her up and bring her home. He did not buy her drinks, nor did he dance with her, and as far as he's concerned, it's a good thing he was there or things could have turned out a lot worse. Deirdre reiterates that that's not what Tracy told her, and Doug reminds her that he's not in the habit of seducing teenagers, especially when he fancies the teenager's mother.

Percy sits in a lawnchair, clipboard in hand, counting the cars that whiz past. Phyllis happens upon this scene and naturally wants to know what he's doing. Percy gruffly asks what it looks like he's doing, and without another word, Phyllis crosses the road and lets herself into Des' home. Deirdre returns from her chat with Doug, and as she unlocks her door, Percy informs her that she just missed Tracy -- who went off to school "all dolled up." Phyllis, meanwhile, returns with a stool and a heavy plaid blanket. Seating herself beside the man of her dreams, she covers both their knees with the blanket and informs Percy that she's there to keep him company and to help him. After all, "two heads are better than one," especially when one of the heads is hers!

At her florist shop, Maggie is advising a client on wedding flowers when she sees Mike entering the store. Excusing herself momentarily, Maggie angrily confronts Mike, who obviously wants to talk about Mark. Maggie makes it clear that she can't discuss things there and then, so tells Mike to come by her house around 7:00 that evening. When Mike asks if Mark will be there, she informs him that he won't -- he'll be with friends.

At lunch, Deirdre bumps into Doug again, this time at the Rover's Return, and tells him that Tracy was gone by the time she got home, so she couldn't confront her about the obvious lies she was telling regarding her night out. Doug laughs that he'd have told lies at that age too, if it meant it would get him out of trouble at home. He offers to come by Deirdre's house later -- Tracy wouldn't dare embroider the truth in his presence.

Over at the bar, Liz teases Mavis by asking her about her two dates, prompting Raquel to describe a double blind date she and a friend went on, years ago. Derek arrives and introduces Harry Potts to Mavis, whom Potts calls "Maisie." Potts exudes grace and good manners, inviting Derek and Mavis to sit down while he gets the drinks. At their table, Mavis immediately remarks that Harry seems "charming," and not at all the monster Derek described.

Outside, Sally has David and Rosie in the double stroller, and finding Percy at his post, confides that she's worried that the reporter won't show up. After all, it's just a traffic problem in a little back street. Seconds later, a car pulls up and a reporter and photographer emerge. Before Sally can introduce herself, Potts, who was obviously watching for the newspaper people, rushes forward and nearly knocks Sally over as he introduces himself. Percy tries to explain that Sally was the one who circulated the petition, and snatching it from her hands, Potts goes on about his role as Councillor. In the midst of all this, Phyllis rushes in with a hot bowl of soup and sticks a spoonful of it in Percy's mouth!

At the Cafe, Alma is still down in the dumps over Mike and Mark, and remarks that she and Gail have something in common. Mike's liaison eleven years ago has finally caught up with him, while Martin's youthful boyishness attracted "Miss Shamrock." Gail accuses her of hitting below the belt with that remark, and Alma agrees and apologises. Speaking of the devil, Mike arrives then and informs Alma that he has an appointment that night. When asked if it has to do with business, Mike truthfully tells Alma that he'll be meeting Maggie. Alma's face freezes.

Rita asks Sally about her meeting with Potts earlier in the day, and Sally disgustedly characterizes him as a "pompous little windbag" -- all smarm and promises with the Gazette.

Tracy gets home late, but to her surprise her mother is calmly eating her tea, apparently unconcerned about her daughter. Instead of getting the third degree, Deirdre tells her that she didn't wait for her -- she has plans to go out. There's a knock at the door, and when Tracy opens it, she finds Doug. "You're not going out with *HIM*?" she asks, and when Deirdre confirms that she is, Tracy looks like a deer caught in the headlights, especially when Deirdre begins to review Tracy's story of the night before. Tracy stutters that she was "all muddled," when Doug reminds her that he didn't buy her a drink, didn't dance with her, there was no "funny business," and he only brought her home because she was feeling sick. Deirdre suggests that an embarrassed Tracy apologise to Doug, which she does.

Mike arrives at Maggie's, and she immediately makes it clear that she isn't happy with this meeting, especially when Mike becomes too familiar by calling her "Mags." She feels that nothing has changed, and shows her contempt for Mike by calling him the "rich achiever, the one who always has to win." Mike tries to soften her up by telling her that he cares about Mark and thinks about him all the time. Resigned to a discussion, Maggie offers him tea, and while she's in the kitchen, Mike gazes affectionately at a picture of Mark.

Back at the Rover's Return, Mavis goes on about Harry Potts -- she thinks he really was "alright" and still can't understand Derek's problems with him. Percy, meanwhile, chastises Phyllis for always hanging around him, and Sally insists that Kevin buy Phyllis and Percy a drink for their help with the traffic campaign. Deirdre and Doug arrive, and after getting their drinks, Deirdre apologises to Doug for jumping to conclusions. Mike and Maggie continue their discussion of Mark, and Maggie makes it clear that she doesn't want Mike in Mark's life. Mike can't believe that, since Mark has been asking questions of people he knows, but Maggie claims that's only because he has a natural curiosity -- it doesn't mean that Mark wants anything from Mike. When she tries to put her foot down by saying that she "won't allow" a relationship between the two, Mike accuses Ken of poisoning her opinion of him. Maggie denies that, and in tears now, tells him that she wishes he'd just leave them both alone -- she wants nothing to do with him, and neither does Mark. Mark arrives unexpectedly in the middle of all this, and seeing how upset his mother is, correctly assumes that Mike is the cause. "You made her cry," he concludes, and as Mike looks helplessly on, Mark tells him to leave. "Go on -- GO!"

Heather Morlan

Harry Potts: RUSSELL DIXON Reporter: JANYS CHAMBERS
Written by ADELE ROSE Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Thursday (3494, Monday 25 January 1993)

Deirdre again tries to talk calmly to her hormonally poisoned daughter who doesn't see the harm in drinking too much. She reveals that she's been to a pub once before but didn't drink so that didn't count and only did this time because her mates were too and she didn't want to look an idiot. Deirdre pounces on that statement as evidence that as much as Tracy wants to be treated like an adult, that kind of attitude marks her immaturity and she wonders what else Tracy would do not to look an idiot? Steal cars? Mug someone? Drugs? In that "You don't know anything" tone of voice that teens have perfected, she denies using or wanting to use drugs (ah, hindsight!) nor any of the other things and she compares her one night of fun to her mother's regular tipple in the pub and at home and can't see it's not the same thing at all. She escapes further "discussion" and takes herself to school, reminding her mother that she's coming home at dinnertime.

Lisa totes a laundry basket out the back and shyly greets Mavis who's feeding her birds. Mavis is civil bit a bit acerbic, making sure Lisa knows that she and Derek were disturbed when Lisa and Des arrived home quite late from Hartlepool last night. Lisa apologizes for it and Des pops his head out the upstairs window with a few glib words at the domestic scene before him. Mavis makes another bitchy remark about late night noise and retreats into the house.

Maggy drops Mark off to school. Before she leaves, Ken approaches. I assume she's told him the details of Mike's visit the night before via phone or something because he only asks how Mark is. A bit quiet and the two make somewhat bitter jokes about Mike Baldwin's eternal presence in their lives unto the afterlife. Ken wishes he could have seen Mike's own son order him out of the house and both agree they haven't heard the end of this affair. Ken wants to see Maggy tonight but she thinks she had better have a night in with Mark and try to sort things out.

Alma spends hours ranting about Mike's version of what happened with Maggy. She's highly suspicious of his version and concludes that Maggy was definitely more upset than Mike describes and worries about what exactly it was that Mike said Mark go the wrong idea about when he tossed his father out. Gail pretty much just nods and agrees with her. This woman needs to take a pill. Alma not Gail. Or else i do because she's irritating the hell out of me and Gail too.

Tracy and Debbie compare notes. Debbie seems to have got away with their little drunken night out. Tracy would have too if Doug hadn't taken her home. Debbie asks if Doug fancies Deirdre and Tracy whispers conspiratorially that she thinks Doug really fancies her! Scandalous! Debbie thinks that's disgusting, an older man like that after a teenager. Tracy makes out like she thinks so too but Doug hasn't done anything about it yet anyway (can you say "transference"? Actually, to tell the truth, i remember getting crushes on older men when i was 16 and it wouldn't have taken much more than this sort of incident to fire me up either so it's pretty realistic.)

Meanwhile, Doug has been sent a 2000 quid cheque by a mate that owes him money only he can't cash it because the Receiver will confiscate it for the debts. He tries to convince Kevin to deposit the cheque in his bank account and pay it back to Doug when it clears (the "To" bit is blank) but Kevin, having had enough of dodgey deals via Mike Baldwin to last a lifetime (and it ain't over yet, my son!) refuses to take part. It doesn't matter how Doug tries to convince Kevin, with his luck he's sure to get caught and wants no part of it so Doug goes off sulking.

Emily and Percy meet with Sally to decide on the next step of action and the end result is that they will write a letter to their local MP. Percy has noted a 500 percent increase in traffic that should make people notice. Sally is grateful for their help.

Doug's next move is to try to charm Deirdre. Tracy overhears them joking about wayward children and sulks at them talking about her but that's what she gets for lurking silently around the house isn't it? Then, while she's in the kitchen heating up beans, she hears Doug outline the cheque scam to Deirdre who steadfastly refuses to take part as well. He's really in fits now thought it stems more from getting himself into all this bankruptcy bother in the first place. How much do you want to bet Tracy will offer Doug the use of her bank account? 2000 quid?

That night, Mark starts asking Maggy questions about Mike but she puts him off until after they have their tea so they can sit and talk properly.

Doug is still stroppy with Kevin by the end of the working day which sends Kevin into gales of defensive whining but Tracy interrupts just as they are about to ... well i was going to say kiss and make up but you know what i mean. First Kevin and then Doug make hurtful comments rubbing it in about her young and tender age with comments about school being out, roller skate maintenance and "jail bait" etc. Very condescending. Tracy offers him the use of her building society account. It sounds like he is dismissing the idea with a thanks but no thanks but the word "no" doesn't actually pass his lips. I get the impression he's not taking her up on it but i also have the feeling he just might do if he gets desperate.

Des tells Lisa he's going to get the house evaluated but it could still take awhile to sell. She's had a quiet day in and then they check out the newspaper which has the article in it about Sally's traffic campaign. Except the large photo has Harry Potts dominating it with Phyllis feeding Percy soup on a spoon in front and there's Sally way in back. Which Sally is not pleased about as we switch scenes.

She thinks it looks like a senior citizen soup kitchen and thinks nobody will take any notice. Kevin is his usual patronizing and condescending self, telling the little woman that she's much prettier than Potts any way and predicts the picture won't matter as long as the article gets read. Sally is put off though, and moans about the tinpot portrayal. Why do the newspapers always make things look so stupid? Kevin can only point out that at least they spelled her name right. Gormless twit!

Mike and alma are having their supper at the pub and invite a newly arrived Alf and Audrey to join them. Alf seems eager but Audrey puts the skids on that as he's already eaten an apparently forgettable meal of chops and some green vegetable or other. Mike can't resist doing a bit of business as he sees Angie is in the pub and Alma sits there with a doleful look on her face and a lip on her like an inner tube. Deirdre comes in to find Doug and buy him a drink. She's still not doing the cheque thing but wants to apologize anyway. She tells him that she lent a former lover money and never saw it or him again (Phil Jennings) so she's twice as cautious now though she's sure Doug's nothing like that. Doug accepts the apology and the drink.

Maggy relates some of her relationship with Mike to Mark, telling her son that she didn't love Mike but fell for his charm anyway. She could see through it just the same to the person Mike really was but supposes he's changed since then. (No, he hasn't) She doesn't want to turn Mark against his father so will leave it up to Mark to decide. If he wants to get to know Mike better it's up to him and she won't stand in his way. Sounds like Mark has some decisions to make and thinking to do.

We next to go Mike and Alma's where she's sitting with the exact same look and lip on her face. Mike arrives home. Turns out Alma told him she was in the loo but she took off for home leaving him stuck there looking like an idiot. (i'm not sure if she took the car or a taxi) She's put out that he was out with her for a meal but was doing business and flashing his money around. He can't see the problem (thick as a plank, this one!) after all they're married! So? She's supposed to know him and realize that he's got a business to run. But, she wails, you were out with me! I was *out* with my *wife*, he arrogantly points out. "I'm a person, you know, not a shopping trolley!. Seeing she's not going to win this one, she changes tracks and starts childishly wailing and ranting about his one track conversation about his precious son... Mark this, Mark that, yadda, yadda, nag, obsessed, moan, whinge, Mark, whine! Obnoxiously he moans about the same old record being played, change it will you!? He accuses her of being hysterical because she can't have children of her own and she's bound to get in a state. She shows admirable restraint in not taking the nearest kitchen utensil to his jugular, i thought when he spouts the amazingly condescending "If this is your change of life, for God's sake, Tell me!!"

Fortunately he realizes he's crossed the line and to avoid permanent disfigurement he heads her off with an apology saying he didn't mean it though she shakes off his embrace and the credits roll rather abruptly so i think we lost the last bit of this to the editor's scissors.

Diane Johnston

Debbie Dawson: JENNIE SIXSMITH
Written by STEPHEN MALLATRAT Directed by SPENCER CAMPBELL

Friday (3495, Wednesday 27 January 1993)

Des pops home a bit earlier than lunchtime to find Phyllis having a lesson in the correct application of disposable nappies. As she fastens the tapes on little Tom's diaper, Des looks on with pride and amusement. The reason he came home, he explains to Lisa and Phyllis, is to let them know the real estate agent will be coming around this afternoon. Lisa and Phyllis map out a plan of action to tidy the place as Des picks up Tommy (his "real reason" for coming home!) only to have the diaper fall down around the baby's legs.

Vera makes a dash into Alf's Mini Market to pick up a few odds and ends, explaining as she does that the lager is for Jack, not Terry, as Alf assumes. She wishes she could bring R Turry something as it would make a nice change from the "rubbish" he gets in the prison. Deirdre sympathizes but Alf waits until Vera is gone to make his dissenting view known. He doesn't think prisoners deserve any breaks and furthermore, he reckons the populace agrees with him, otherwise why should Deirdre have been defeated in the last election?

In the Kabin, Raquel is exchanging some notes for change for the Rovers when Sally comes in looking for another copy of yesterday's paper. Too late, Rita tells her - they sold out in record time. Raquel offers the copy they still have at the pub and Sally cheerfully accepts. Both Rita and Raquel comment that Sally took a very good picture for the story and Raquel goes as far as to tell her she could have been a model. Sally laughs at the notion - she's a "crusader", not a "page three girl"!

During the Rovers' lunchtime rush, Denise takes a break from "the blue rinse brigade" (half price Wednesdays) to tuck into a hot pot. She is joined by Doug who asks her if she is willing to cash his cheque for him. Nothing doing, Denise couldn't account for that kind of money going through her books and faces enough challenges as it is, thanks. Miffed at the rejection, Doug goes off in a snit, ignoring her apologies. Kevin, who's been watching from a distance comes over to talk to her and Denise assumes he is going to start haranguing her about refusing Doug's request. But no, as he explains, Doug also asked him to cash the cheque and he also had to refuse. He tells her the reason for Doug's predicament as she wasn't already aware, he is bankrupt.

At the bar, Vera stops to have a quick word with Jack before going off to visit Terry. She worries what the heck she'll say to him, about Lisa and Tommy being with Des. Jack catches her out for waiting until now to bring this up when they had the whole morning at home. He reckons she waited because she thought he would be too busy to discuss it and would tell her to say whatever she thinks right. Well she's in for a surprise because he now tells her that she is NOT to say whatever she thinks best to R Terry! "If you go ahead and tell Terry the worst now, it'll be more than a battering Des gets!" Jack warns sternly.

As they wait for the school bus to arrive, Mark probes Nicky about his father's death and Gail's remarriage to Martin. Nicky says that he wasn't keen on Martin at first but admits that he's got used to him now and it's "okay", he guesses. They continue chatting on the bus and when it arrives at Nicky's stop, Mark gets off too with the intent of facing his "real" father.

The estate agent is giving Des' place the once over, none too complimentary in her assessment. As she criticizes the limited space in the kitchen, Phyllis, who's just been on the phone with "another estate agent", joins them from the livingroom to inform Des that "the other" agent says he'll have no problem selling the house. The news results in a sudden improvement in the lady realtor's outlook as she notes how "attractive and well-equipped" the place is!

In the garage, Kevin and Doug are having another argument about Doug's cheque. Frustrated that no one will cash it for him, Doug says he now regrets having declared bankruptcy. Kevin takes pity on him and offers to lend him £20 but Doug refuses the offer saying he has his own money if only he could get at it! In the midst of this, Mark shyly approaches and asks if Mike Baldwin works there. Doug snaps back rudely that he doesn't - he only collects the money! Kevin steps forth to tell Mark that Mike isn't around at the moment but he should be later. Mark asks for a message to be relayed: "Tell him Mark came, his *son*, Mark", he says simply. Kevin is surprised at the revelation but recovers himself as he sees Baldwin driving up. "You can tell him yourself", he smiles at Mark, nodding towards the approaching car.

At the cafe, Gail is losing patience with Alma's moodiness. As Alma begs off a bit early for the day, she moans that she doesn't have the energy for another row with Mike, in fact, she's lost track of whether there's one going on currently. Gail doesn't see why she's making such a big deal about Mike having a son and reminds her that she didn't want children herself. Alma reasons that while that may be true, it doesn't necessarily follow that Mike shared her feeling. She reckons he may have just gone along with it because he knew she couldn't give him any.

By this time, Mike has arrived back at the flat with young Mark. They are both feeling awkward but Mike does his best to welcome Mark, inviting him to sit down so they can get to know each other. Mark confesses that he told his mother he'd be having tea at Nicky's so Mike offers to make him a sandwich. It's clear he doesn't quite know what to say to the boy but he's very happy to have him there.

As Alf and Deirdre count tins of tuna and beans in the back, Tracy comes into the shop to purchase some treat or other. She overhears Deirdre telling Alf that she's free to work late since her date with Doug has been called off. Tracy's little heart leaps for joy as she calls back to let her mother know that the money's on the counter and leaves the shop hastily.

Getting down to brass tacks, Mark asks Mike to explain his involvement with Maggy and specifically, why he "didn't want" him. Mike hastens to assure the boy that he did want him, he even offered to marry Maggy. He paints a picture of his relationship with Mark's mother, how they had some laughs together but by the time she knew Mark was coming, they'd gone their separate ways. "What did you think when she married my father?" Mark inquires. Mike admits he was jealous of Harry but he knew him to be a decent bloke. He points out that he never stopped caring about Mark, but agreed with Maggy that for the sake of keeping things simple, he would stay out of his son's life until he came of age.

Lisa returns from a walk with Tommy to hear the good news that the house is now officially on the market. Des gives Phyllis the credit for getting it listed so we now understand that the "other" estate agent was merely a ploy. They go outside together to watch the sign being erected just as Vera arrives home from her visit to the prison. She looks across and takes note of the scene with disgust before turning her back on them to go home. Lisa wants to go over to talk to her but Des and Phyllis stop her, saying it'll do no good anyway.

Having had a bath and now lounging in a dressing gown, Curly dials a pizza parlour as Angie plugs away at her drawing board. He pauses to ask her if she'd like him to order something for her as he isn't up to cooking tonight and she asks for a salad. Having ordered, he goes to the kitchen for the bottle of white wine he's been chilling and offers her a drink. When she accepts, Curly gets his hopes up for a nice quiet evening together and goes off for the corkscrew. While he's in the kitchen, Neil comes to the door and Angie invites him in to have some wine with them. Curly reappears from the kitchen with two glasses just as Neil is being ushered in. On seeing him, his jaw drops with the disappointing realization that his hopes for an evening alone with Angie were in vain.

All dolled-up and looking at least six months older, Tracy appears at the garage as Doug is shutting up the place. She takes delight in informing him that her offer to put his cheque through her account was a serious one. Ignoring her flirtiness, he thinks about it for a second before telling her that he'll accept, only it *must be* kept between the two of them. Boldly placing her hand on his shoulder, she assures him that no one else will find out!

Vera comes into the Rovers to get some cans for take out, but Betty, sensing her down-heartedness after the visit to Terry, invites her to stay on for a drink. Vera orders a Scotch and they sit down for a chat. Betty sympathizes with her sense of loss, noting that it's too bad Jack's gone off to the dog races with Don, which event, as Vera comments bitterly, shows where Jack's priorities are! She laments that she alone cares - about Terry's fate and the fact that she's losing another grandchild. Betty tells her gently that she understands her feelings but she needs to accept that Terry is at least partly to blame for the way things have happened.

Elsewhere in the pub, Kevin is telling Sally the news that Baldwin has a son. She gleefully probes for details but as Kevin doesn't know any, he promises to keep her abreast of any new developments.

Rita, Des and Mavis sit together quietly talking about Des' house being on the market. Mavis must be relieved that her days of living in a "war zone" will soon be at an end and tells Des that she's happy for him and Lisa. It occurs to Rita that he and Lisa might like to have a look at Ted's house, an ideal home for a "family", she points out. Vera overhears and reels in anger: "Someone else's *family*, you mean!" before stalking out of the pub.

Alma returns home to find Mike gone and the remnants of Mark's sandwich, beside an empty can of Coke. She immediately sizes up the situation and slumps down in a chair to wait, knowing she must now accept the reality of Mike's son being a part of their lives.

Mike is at this moment taking Mark home. Maggy greets her son at the door and expresses surprise at seeing Mike with him. "Before you start," says Mike, "*he* found *me*!" He assures her that their meeting has come out all right, they talked and Mark seems to be accepting. As he walks back to his car, she closes the door and turns to face Mark. Like Alma, she understands that she now has no control in the situation and like Alma, she has no choice but to come to terms with it.

Anita Belanger

Estate Agent: ROSEMARY HIRST
Written by PAUL ABBOTT Directed by SPENCER CAMPBELL


Originally transmitted: 29 January, 1, 3, 5 & 8 February 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 6 - Friday 10 March 2000
Episode Numbers: 3496 - 3500

Monday (3496, Friday 29 January 1993)

Neil's kept Angie up late drinking and God knows what else. Curly seems happy at her decision to have a quiet night in *alone* and happily suggests a home cooked fish tea. But does she keep her promise? Heck as like! After tea, when Neil shows up on the doorstep with a bottle of red, she launches into his arms, hangover thankfully gone. Curly glumly looks on and rather than feel like a third wheel escapes to Des's where he ends up babysitting so that Des and Lisa can go to the Rover's for a drink.

Sally spends the day trying to chase down Alf so she can complain about the traffic situation to him since she's had no satisfactory response from the traffic people. Alf spends most of the day avoiding her but she catches up with him when he's hiding in the stock room and gives him an ear bashing when he's less than forthcoming about helping her.

While she was on her alf-quest (that sounds like the name of a video game, doesn't it?) she passes on the gossip that Kevin brought home, about the lad that came in to the garage claiming to be Mike's son. Deirdre nearly swallows her tongue and manages to be cool, agreeing with Sally who speculates that Kevin might have got it wrong. Audrey is fizzy and delighted with something new to chew on and she does, nearly chomping the bit off while waiting to get hold of Alma, wondering if Alma knows. Phyllis has overheard the whole thing and in her mind, it's probably true. With the number of women Mike has had, well, as she says, if you fire enough bullets, one's bound to hit something eventually! LOL!

When she leaves the shop, Phyllis makes a beeline for the cafe, intent on getting the skinny from Alma but Alma, though she's shocked that Phyllis has heard about Mark, doesn't want to talk about it. That's ok, Phyllis chuckles as she gets ready to leave, there's plenty of folk who will! Alma is aghast that the news is out and moans some more to Gail.

Doug tries one last time and asks Mike to cash his cheque. Mike decides it's not a good move, tax wise and turns him down, instructing him to find someone who isn't self employed. Better yet, who doesn't pay any taxes at all. Yes it looks like Doug is going to take Tracy up on her offer and after school he meets her at the building society where he warns her not to let her mother know. After school she's doing homework at the table and is surprised when Deirdre mentions that Doug is taking her out tonight. But he never said! (ooops!) and then she covers smoothly. While Deirdre is getting ready, so does Tracy and she sheds her school uniform for something a little more grown up, with makeup and hair fixed nice to finish the look. When Doug comes to pick up Deirdre, she starts flashing the passbook around, nearly giving Doug a heart attack and he hustles Deirdre out soonest.

Mark stops in to the garage after school again. Mike is pleased to see him and drives him to the flower shop after stopping for a milkshake along the way. Maggy is underwhelmed. Later it seems as if she's been grocery shopping as she and Mark bring the bags in from the van. Strangely enough she's got a very large bag of dog food. Now since the first appearances of these two there has been absolutely no sighting or mention of any dog. Perhaps that's what she's feeding Mark? Well i have that off my chest but that's not all. She proceeds to impress upon Mark that she doesn't' want him to go to see Mike every day, he's not good father material after all. Harry was Mark's dad and she susses that Mark is using Mike as a substitute because Harry's gone. Thing is she just finished telling him the other day that she won't stand in the way of him getting to know Mike if that's what he wants so i guess i'm going to have to beat the Continuity Fairy about the head and ears again with my big stick!

That night she tells Ken all about it and has decided she's going to talk to Mike and arrange with him to see Mark on a regular basis, perhaps an hour a week. Bad idea! Ken warns Maggy that Mike will take that inch and run the marathon with it!

Meanwhile Alma and Mike have confirmed that neither of them told anyone else about Mark (other that Gail and Ken who know) so they don't know who spilled the beans.

Mavis inadvertently insults Lisa after suggesting the best way to successfully sell a house is to tidy up the garden. Lisa takes it the wrong way, seemingly growing paranoid at being the subject of unending local gossip and accuses Mavis on implying that what she really means is that they should tidy up their lives. That's not what Mavis meant at all (thought it *is* what she believes!).

Finally, Audrey gets Alma alone in a pub booth to tell her about the gossip she's heard that she wouldn't for the life of her ever pass on but... she heard... Alma looks resigned and confirms it to Audrey's amazement.

Diane Johnston

Written by PETER WHALLEY Directed by SPENCER CAMPBELL

Tuesday (3497, Monday 1 February 1993)

In Webster Hollow, Sally is whining that her complaints about the Street's traffic problems have fallen on deaf ears. Kevin gloomily predicts that little her going up against the big bad beaurocracy will just grind her down. She needs to try something more dramatic. She sarcastically thanks him for his unwavering support.

Mike reads the paper at the breakfast table as Alma muses about not much wanting to go into work today. He sympathises but she points out she has it worse than he does - "Do you know what it's like to stand behind that counter and be asked every ten minutes about your husband's love child?" Mike winces but the conversation is interrupted by a knock at the door. It's Maggie. She and Alma are introduced for the first time and Alma offers to leave them to talk, but Mike asks her to stay, saying there should be no more secrets. Maggie apologizes for showing up unannounced but suggests that they'd be better off if they sorted something out about Mike seeing Mark, and the sooner the better. They agree to meet at her house at nine. Alma is polite but looks quite ill through the entire conversation.

Emily and Percy show up at Sally's for a strategy meeting. Percy brings a letter he's gotten from their MP but to Sally's disappointment the MP merely says he's passed their letter on to the Highways Department and he'll contact her again after he gets their report and reviews it. Sally objects that she's just got off the phone with the Highways Department and they hadn't a clue what she was talking about - and clearly Councilor Potts hasn't done a thing. She's discouraged but Percy and Em say she mustn't give up now. She bucks up and says they're right - they'll dress Rosie and David right this minute and go tell Alf Roberts that the fight continues!

In the Cafe, Gail suggests to Alma that it's a good thing an arrangement's being clarified between Maggie, Mark and Mike. Perhaps things will settle down now. Alma is still concerned. Gail suggests they go to the Rovers tonight so Alma won't have to sit at home and wait anxiously. Alma gratefully agrees. [Now, hands up all of you who would NOT expect, nay demand, to sit in on this "arrangement" meeting which could dramatically affect your life and your husband's for years to come? Thought so.]

Alf is in front of his shop loading things into his car when Emily, Percy, and Sally (with Rosie and David in a stroller) accost him and demand to know what he's going about their petition. He stalls but finally tell them they'd be best off to forget about the petition, nobody cares about it, and the Council's got more important things to do than deal with it. Sal sneers that it would be different if Alf wanted something done about it, though, wouldn't it? He'd get some action then! Alf warns her to mind what she's saying, and as for Emily, he goes on, "I'm surprised at you - involved with this crew!" Percy indignantly asks who Alf's calling "a crew" - "We represent the people 'round here!" he protests. "*I* represent the people's interests round here - you just represent your own interests! Now if you'd just take my advice you'll put this out of your mind altogether and" - to Sally - "do what you're good at - taking care of children. Now, if you'll excuse me, _some_ of us have work to do!" He storms into the shop, leaving the trio with mouths agape. "Flaming cheek!" sputters Sally. "I've a good mind to put sugar in his petrol tank," she adds, showing just what a class act this chick is! LOL!

Instead, she does something even more dramatic - spying Alf's keys in his car's ignition, she jumps in and parks the car across Coronation Street. She gets out, locking the car doors so the brake can't be released, and holds the keys hostage. Alf has come running out of the shop and sputters that she can't do that - she's blocking traffic! There's no traffic problem, according to Alf, retorts Sally, so it shouldn't be a problem. He then says it's an offense to keep his keys so she obliges by saying she won't, then - she throws them into a letterbox! As Alf paws at the pillar box in disbelief, she says, "You used to be a postman, didn't you, Mr. Roberts? You stick with what _you're_ good at and get 'em out!" Horns have begun honking now as traffic has backed all the way down Coronation Street and around the corner. Alf groans that the postie won't be around for an hour. "We'll just have to wait, then, won't we?" Sally says.

By now, of course, a large crowd has left businesses and homes to see what's going on. Alf begs Steve MacDonald to jimmy his car door so they can put the vehicle in neutral, release the brake and push it out of the way. Steve disingenuously says doesn't know how to break into a car, and anyway, he's "gone straight". Alf then begs Kevin's help. He's a mechanic - can't he do something? Kevin wisely says he's staying out of this one! A disgruntled trapped truck driver says he's had enough and he's going to call the police to tow Alf's car.

Maggie visits Ken at Weatherfield Comprehensive. She tells him she is going to meet with Mike and didn't want Ken to feel she was doing it behind his back. Ken makes it clear he doesn't like the idea, she assures him she doesn't any more than he does, but they agree that if it makes Mark happy, that's the important thing.

The crowd in Coronation Street is even bigger. The police arrive and ask "wot's all this, then?". Alf blames Sally for the trouble; she blames Alf for not doing his duty as a Councilor. The Sergeant says he will have to break a window to get into the car. (Chuckle of the day: Alf looks indignantly at the Sergeant and says "I hope you'll pay for it!" The Sergeant is not amused and also makes it clear that's NOT how it works.) Alf then begs the officer to break into the car as a thief would, rather than breaking a window, so as to minimize damage. The affronted Sergeant says he's a copper, not a car thief! The police then order the gathered principals clear due to the flying glass. Sally says she's not budging but the Sergeant sternly tells her she may not be moving but the glass will be, and he assumes those children are here? Chagrined, she moves away but Percy isn't going anywhere! Finally two Bobbies lift him by the arms and physically carry him, still protesting, out of the street! Alf tries one last time to stop the now quite annoyed Sergeant, pointing out that he IS a Councilor. The Sergeant replies that in that case, Alf will "know the penalty for obstructing an officer in the performance of his duties!" The window is duly shattered. "One problem after another, Councilor, isn't it?" asks the Sergeant as he reaches in to open the car door. "'Cause you're nicked!"

The excitement over, Emily goes into the Kabin where Mavie queries her about the wisdom of getting involved with that morning's protest. Breaking the law - doesn't she think that's setting a bad example? Saint Emily shows that her radical streak predates the appearance of her nephew Spider, the Anarchist Arachnid, some five years later; she replies that "if it stops a small child from getting killed, I think it's an extremely _good_ example! Indeed, I'm PROUD of what I've done! GOOD DAY, Mavis!" She departs. Mavis, quite oblivious to the fact that "she's been told", sighs "she's still not herself, you know." Rita gazes at Mavis in disbelief.

At Casa Curly, Angie's at the drawing board. In case we weren't clear on just what's been happening in Norman's mind lately, he glances up from the sofa to take a long look up her shapely legs, lingering on her attractive behind. Angie's frustrated and stressed - she'll never get this design done for tomorrow, Baldwin will kill her! Curly offers to get take-away later on - that'll save her some time. She thanks him gratefully for his thoughtfulness. Encouraged, Curly goes on about how nice it is, having a night in. A knock at the door is presumed to be Des - "well, I'll have to disappoint you tonight, mate!" Curly says cheerfully aloud to himself as he approaches the door. Of course, it's Neil instead, here to whisk Angie off for "a quick drink". Angie barely gets a word in as Curly earnestly argues why she can't go out tonight, deadlines, not getting enough sleep these days as it is, etc., while Neil argues the opposite side. It's a lost cause for Curly, however, as Angie's more than willing to be persuaded, as long as she's back by 8:30 p.m.

Alf exits the police station where Audreh is waiting for him in the now-repaired car. She assures him that no, she didn't have Kevin Webster replace the car window, she had another place do it, although they charged twice as much. For once, Alf looks satisfied at having spent more than necessary!

Outside Curly's, Angie apologizes for his overprotectiveness. Neil's vehicle is waiting and it turns out he actually didn't mention the Rover's, did he? He has bigger plans. She again insists that she must be back by 8:30 regardless of where they go.

In the Rover's, Sally, Kevin, Percy, Emily, Dreary and Doug drink in celebration of whatever it is they think they accomplished besides angering Alf! Alf and Audreh come in for a drink and are in for some ribbing. Alf angrily confirms that he's not being charged by police, but that's no thanks to them. Audrey drags him over to the bar before they can get involved in yet another slanging match. Behind the bar, Jack takes their order before inquiring impishly, "Alf, you didn't see RTerry while you were inside, did ya?"

Mike arrives at Maggie's. Mark is upstairs. They agree to talk first about how often Mark and Mike should visit. "I thought weekends to start with," says Mike blithely, adding he could pick Mark up Friday, then there's Saturday, Sunday... Maggie's naturally rather taken aback! It's a big change, she says. They might not want to be too ambitious! "Only a suggestion," sulks Baldwin.

Gail and Alma have a drink in the Rovers. Ken joins them and guesses that Alma's reason for being there is the same as his own. They agree that neither of them is very keen on the idea of Mike getting heavily involved in Mark (and Maggie's) lives.

Negotiations continue at the Redmonds'. Once a week, perhaps. Mike suggests the same day each week. How about a weekend afternoon? Maggie dithers; she's not even sure it should be that often. Mike says he only thought that the same day each week might offer more stability for Mark. Maggie suddenly seems to panic again. "You're putting pressure on me!" she says, agitated. She continues: "He's more my son than he is yours, Mike. You wouldn't see him at all if I didn't want you to!" Mark has entered the room unheard and now speaks up. "What about what *I* want? Don't *I* have a say in all this?" "'Course you do... we're just trying to agree, that's all," Maggie says quietly. "What _do_ you want?" asks Mike. "I want to see me Dad, when it suits *me*. Not you," says Mark firmly before exiting. "It's easy for him to say that," Maggie says tearfully. Mike says that he appreciates Maggie's problem. He won't force her hand just because of what Mark says. He wants to be Mark's father, but only in a way that fits in with her. Maggie says he is being "very considerate". Mike pragmatically notes that "that's the only way it's going to work, isn't it?"

ronniecat

Truck Driver: PAUL KISSAUN Police Sergeant: JAMES MASTERS
Written by MARTIN ALLEN Directed by CHARLES LAUDER

Wednesday (3498, Wednesday 3 February 1993)

It's the beginning of another day, and Gail brings David to Sally's before setting off to work at the Cafe. Gail is feeling a little weary because David was up at 5:00 that morning, "jumping all over his brother." The conversation turns (as it does throughout much of this episode) to the argy-bargy yesterday, when Sally used Alf's van to block the street. Sally feels bad that Alf got into trouble with the police, and thinks that all she really succeeded in doing was turning him into a martyr. Now she's thinking of packing in her efforts, but Gail encourages her to continue by telling her that she heard Audrey say that Sally is "capable of anything."

At the Corner Shop, Alf is understandably not in a good mood, so when Steve tries to tease him about yesterday's events, Alf invites him to "shove off."

Curly is preparing to leave for work, and when he comes downstairs, he finds a depressed Angie. When he asks why she's so glum, she admits that she can't meet Mike Baldwin's deadline for a t-shirt design. Curly isn't sympathetic, noting that she shouldn't have stayed out 'til after midnight with Neil when she knew she had the deadline hanging over her head. Neil promised he'd take her out for a "quick drink," and Angie needs to tell him that she can't keep doing this. He also suggests that she tell Baldwin that she just can't hack it with two jobs, but seeing the expression on her face, Curly relents and offers to ring Hanif and tell him she's under the weather. Angie brightens immediately and dials her work number so that Curly can make her excuses.

Ken barks orders to the students who rush past him to get to their respective classes. He sees Mark in the hall and reminds him that he's late, but Mark blames it on the fact that he overslept. His mom and Mike kept him up late while they discussed Mike's visiting rights. Ken doesn't look best pleased with this bit of information.

Mike, meanwhile, arrives at the garage, and while he claims he's in a good mood and warns Kevin not to spoil it, his attitude says otherwise. In fact, he accuses Kevin of "aiding and abetting" Sally in the riot that ensued yesterday, and he complains that those sorts of shenanigans aren't good for any of the businesses on the street.

I wonder if Gail and Alma ever get tired of talking about Mike and his son -- I know I get tired of listening to it! Today, Gail is telling Alma that she can't stop Mike from seeing his own son, and suggests that she just let things ride. As with all new things, Gail thinks that the attraction will soon wear off, but Alma says (for the nth time) that she feels that Mike is "obsessed" with the issue. Emily is sitting at a table nearby, with a rather long face, and when asked, she admits that she feels rather badly about yesterday. Yes, Alf is their councillor and should be helpful with their traffic problems, but he's also a friend.

Over at the Corner Shop, Percy can't find a tin of pilchers, and when he asks about them, Alf responds that he has a nerve coming into his shop after yesterday's events. While Percy tries to garner moral support from Ken, who's also shopping, Harry Potts comes into the shop. Percy takes the opportunity to have a go at him as well, and Alf is so disgusted by everything that he announces that he's shutting the shop so that he can talk to Potts privately. After the door is locked, Alf complains that the entire street is ganging up on him, but ever the cadger, Potts suggests that a sandwich and a cup of tea wouldn't go amiss.

At the Rover's Return, Raquel asks Angie if she has the day off, to which Angie replies that she's "working at home." She was out late, and has a deadline to meet, but unimpressed, Raquel asks if she was out with her "window cleaner." Angie informs her that Neil is not a "window cleaner," but Raquel can only remark that whatever he is, he's an improvement over "dopey Curly -- but only just." Angie takes umbrage at that, and points out that Curly is the best friend she'll ever have.

Emily tells Jack that both she and Sally feel bad about the way things evolved the day before, and they feel that it's now up to council to do something about the traffic. Jack thinks they ought to hit Alf again -- "while he's on the ropes." Percy walks into the pub at that moment, and Jack quips "up the revolution, eh Percy?" "Up yours and all" is Percy's rejoinder.

Nearby, Doug is pressing Deirdre for "more action" in the dating game. As far as he's concerned, they've reached the point where a date and a quick kiss goodnight aren't enough (nudge, nudge, wink, wink), but Deirdre reminds him that she has a teenaged daughter at home. Ah, but Doug points out that Tracy isn't home all the time, and he wasn't necessarily suggesting that he should spend the night.

Back at the bar, Percy tells Emily that he thinks they should not give up the fight, but a discouraged Emily disagrees. In her opinion, demonstrating to get a point across is one thing, but getting a councillor arrested is quite another.

Meanwhile, Alf is obviously looking for a way to avoid another confrontation, so he escorts Harry Potts to Sally's house to discuss the traffic problem. Potts suggests again that he could certainly go for a hot cup of tea, but Sally makes it clear that she isn't going to wait on him.

At the pub, Percy tells Emily that he saw Harry Potts at the Corner Shop, and the two decide to have a word with him. On their way to the shop, they walk past the Webster's house and hear Sally telling Potts that he has a week to do something about the traffic -- then it's "back to the barricades." Percy and Emily go into Sally's as Alf and Potts leave, with Percy observing to Emily that it looks like they're all "back in business."

Over at the Cafe, Mike is quizzing Gail about the sorts of things she does to entertain her kids. He needs some ideas about what to do with Mark, and while Gail thinks that it all depends on the child, Alma observes that she's the third wheel in all of this (sigh). Gail suggests that Mike talk to Mark to find out what sorts of things interest him, and she also recommends that Mike talk to Alma (to find out how to get her to change the record!).

Lisa comes into the Cafe, and when asked by Gail how Tommy is doing, Lisa replies that he's fine, and that Des loves playing with him. She tells Gail that she's been thinking of offering to help Sally with the traffic campaign.

Sally, Emily, and Percy sit at the Webster's dining table discussing their strategy, while Percy dandles Rosie on his knee. Sally thinks she may have gone a bit too far yesterday, but it's hard to hear anything she's saying because Rosie sets up a squawl. Obviously in discomfort, Percy asks Sally to take the child, and getting to his feet, complains that he has some sort of cramp in his leg. There's a knock at the door, and since Percy is already up, he offers to go. It's Lisa, offering to do whatever she can to help, but Percy rather rudely tells her that they have all the help they need and closes the door in her face. Back at the table, he tells Sally who was at the door, adding that "we don't need her sort," prompting Sally to ask if he actually put it that way to Lisa. Meanwhile, Emily and Sally have decided that the best course of action is to wait and do nothing further.

Mike holds up a t-shirt in his factory unit, commenting to Steve that they really are crap, but it's what people want. Angie arrives empty-handed, but is quick to tell Mike that she's still working on his t-shirt design. She even tries flattery by remarking that he wouldn't want anything "substandard," but Mike sees through her excuses, and angrily calls her "a student and an amateur" before leaving in a huff.

Quiet and somewhat aloof, Ken sits in Maggie's living room while she tries to explain that she can't stop Mike from seeing his own son. Ken characterizes Mike as being "insidious," and fears that he'll take every advantage of the situation. Maggie does her best to persuade Ken that she still has control; she got rid of Mike once before, and she can do it again. Ken, however, feels that Maggie gave Mike an "open invitation" to visit whenever he wants, and without much further discussion, gives Maggie a chaste peck on the cheek before leaving.

The same subject is being discussed by Mike and Alma, with Alma being rather silly when she suggests that Mike doesn't even know Mark (isn't this all the more reason to spend time with him?), and then observing that they might get sick of each other(!). Mike is thinking of taking Mark bowling, and when Alma reminds Mike that he's very competitive and hates to lose, Mike denies this by stating that he'll even let Mark win.

Ken looks glum as he nurses a beer at the Rovers, and guessing the reason, Audrey tells him that Alma feels the same way about the ongoing discussions between Mike and Maggie. She only hopes that it doesn't put an end to the romance between Ken and Maggie, but Ken fails to see why that would happen.

Vera, meanwhile, moans to Jack that she'd love to see her grandson, but feels she'd be betraying Terry if she even spoke to Lisa. Des comes into the pub at that moment, and obviously wanting to avoid Vera, asks if he can join Kevin and Sally. Sally apologizes, saying they're just on their way home, and Des accuses her of shutting him and Lisa out. After all, Lisa went around that day with a sincere offer to help with the traffic campaign and was made to feel really small. Sally offers to go over to his place and straighten things out with Lisa, but he tells her not to bother, as Lisa has already gone to bed.

Raquel justifiably comments to Steve that the atmosphere in the pub that day has been so thick that you could "slice and toast it." Steve says that things weren't much better at work with Baldwin on the warpath, and Raquel is disappointed when he refuses to give any more details.

When Curly gets home and finds that Angie is really down, he correctly guesses that she wasn't able to finish Baldwin's design, and suggests that Mike won't be pleased. "He *wasn't* pleased," Angie replies; furthermore he told her that she was "unprofessional and untalented." Curly is appalled that cracks from Baldwin would bother Angie. "What is this?" he wonders -- "Baldwin speaks, and the world trembles?" Angie reminds him that designing is supposed to be her career, but she only "plays" at it instead of taking it seriously. Trying his best to be helpful, Curly offers to make their tea, and after they've eaten, Angie can get back to work, but Angie isn't interested. As she heads for the door, she tells him she's going out "for inspiration -- and a good cry while I'm at it." Curly begs her not to go; she'll only end up seeing Neil, staying out late again, and then she'll hate herself in the morning. "Why shouldn't I? -- everyone else does" is her response. Curly takes the opening to tell Angie that he doesn't hate her. "I love you... I mean it... I do," he blurts out. Instead of eliciting the response he so desperately wants, Angie tells him she doesn't need this. "Not now. NOT EVER!"

Heather Morlan

Harry Potts: RUSSELL DIXON
Written by TOM ELLIOTT Directed by CHARLES LAUDER

Thursday (3499, Friday 5 February 1993)

OH, the silence is almost visible between Angie and Curly this morning. Breakfast in separate rooms even! Awkwardly, Curly implores Angie to forget what he said last night. He was in a funny sort of mood. She hesitates and gives him the "good friends" line. He explains (with a ring of truth) that he responded to her state of dejection and depression, thinking perhaps she needed more than just a good friend. He lets her think he exaggerated a bit and escapes to the relative sanity of Bettabuys, leaving her to sigh over her teacup, still mulling it all over in her mind.

In the schoolyard, Rotweiller Barlow is on patrol when Tracy arrives. He nags her to remove her lipstick as it's against the rules and she knows it. Typically she moans and whines and being obtuse, whinges beligerently "If you don't like me being a woman, i'll go take me "brar" off, and all!" She flounces off and Maggie pulls up. He and Maggy make plans, noting this is Mark's first official visit with Mike after school.

There's lots of griping and pecking in the corner shop today. I really didn't catch what it was Percy was on about and you'll forgive me if i didn't rewind the tape but frankly, i didn't care. Nor did i care what Alf and Audrey were bickering about either. Something about porridge, tea and jail cells.

Sally plays referee between the babies and then has to argue with Percy over his moralistic reasons for turning Lisa away at the door the other day. It ends with Sally telling them they're both horrible (Emily thinks Lisa is merely being "foolish") and puts her coat on to run across the road to ask Lisa to join them. She leaves Emily and Percy set to writing another letter to Councilor Potts and baby minding. When she runs across the road, Vera sees her and looks daggers when Sally calls back that she isn't taking sides. Though that's what it looks like to Lisa who's just opened the door. Sally is reluctantly let in and apologizes for Percy's behavior and insists she does want Lisa involved in the struggle! They chat about this and that, Lisa's outcast treatment by the neighbours included. Lisa invites sally to stay for coffee and she does. They continue their conversation, chatting about ex boyfriends and true loves. Lisa describes Terry as her first proper boyfriend (she's only 22 at this point) and was impressed by Terry's confidence. Sally remembers, but it was more of "being full of himself". They chat about how hurt Des was after Steph destroyed him and how much nicer and different Des is. Des comes home for an early lunch to see the two have made up their differences and urges Lisa to accept the invitation to fight for the struggle so she accepts. Across the road Emily and Percy are bickering apparently over Percy's contributions to the letter she is trying to write.

Doug arrives looking for Deirdre at Number 1. Tracy lets him in, blushing (I see the lipstick is back on) and telling him that he can wait for her mother who should be back soon. He's amiable and tries to chat to her about school which she doesn't like (as it emphasizes her age and immaturity) and points out that she's wearing lipstick which a teacher told her looked tarty. She then discusses all aspects of looking tarty while exacting a compliment from him that she does not in fact look tarty and does look nice. Deirdre arrives home just then with shopping bags.

Mike has taken Mark to a bowling alley and is making an effort to bowl at an inferior standard to what he usually does. Mark picks up on it and thinks Mike is letting him win but Mike smoothly tells Mark that letting someone win degrades the game and the competitors. Nobody would respect you if you cheated nor would you respect the people you let win. When Mark asks him if he would ever cheat, i'm ROFL and waiting to see how long his nose is going to grow "That is something i would never, ever do!" he emphatically declares. HAHAHAHAHAHA! I do understand though, he certainly doesn't want to make himself look bad this early in the game, literally or figuratively. Later over burgers, mindful of his own lack of education, Mike urges Mark to put more of an effort into his school work when Mark proclaims it boring. He would rather get a job and move to America and besides, they teach you all sorts in school that you don't need to know. Mike cleverly points out that it's better to need to know something and know it than it is to need to know something and not know it. All those things are like the nuts and bolts you need to make one of those glam American cars, don't seem like much but they all contribute to a good end. He promises to show Mark what he can do with that education if he promises to get one.

Meanwhile, Alma is sitting in the pub bending Audrey's ear about...what else? Mark and Mike. I am coming perilously close to succumbing to that disastrous Updater's chronic ailment, the "Loss of Updater's Will to Live". Does anyone have any duct tape for this broad's mouth? An Asp? (inside joke for those who "carry on" the good fight!) I honestleh don't know how Audrey can stand it! Alma ends with a promise to herself to get to know and like Mark. *sigh* Vera arrives in the pub and cases the joint to make sure Des isn't around. She and Jack exchange the usual about this situation. Neil is next through the door to find a pensive Angie in a corner booth. She doesn't want to talk about much and tells him she prefers to listen, tonight. (A woman with a lot on her mind)

Deirdre and Doug are having a playful cuddle on the couch, Doug is anxious to get a little nookie time but Deirdre is mindful of the need to be discreet should Tracy come in. They engage in a bit more naughty talk about "afternoon delights" and wrestle a bit when they hear the front door close. They spring apart, straighten clothes and turn the lights on in record time before Tracy comes into the room. Personally i think they should let Tracy catch them in a snog and a grope. It would cure that crush in a split second.

Curly and Angie seem a bit less uncomfortable but only just. He does think she brought Neil back for protection which she denies. As he's cleaning his telescope lens, Neil strikes up a conversation about astronomy and telescopes and asks Curly what he finds so interesting in the hobby if he can't get a proper look due to the city lights. Curly can't really find the right words for how it makes him feel without sounding daft though he mentions likening the full moon to the face of a goddess. Anyway he knows Neil doesn't understand and he retreats to his hidey hole under the rafters. Neil makes a mild joke at Curly's somewhat nerdy expense only to have Angie sharply reprimand him. She's still smarting from the revelation of how much she means to Curly it seems.

Mike drops Mark back home and comes into the house. Ken is distinctly not impressed and can barely manage a civil word for Mark's sake. Mike flashes his trademark Sh** eating grin, knowing full well his presence in Mark and Maggy's life rubs on Ken's last nerve and takes his leave. Ken collapses on a chair at the force of the realization that he cannot reconcile Maggy's necessary contact with the father of her son. He whispers sadly, they very nearly had something special but he's like a poison pill. Maggy tearfully pleads with him but it looks like he can't go on.

Wrap up: You do know i detest Ken Barlow? Of course you do! But i'll tell you this for nothing. The only time i really like him, well the actor and the job he does, i suppose, is during his confrontations with Mike Baldwin. He plays the feud extremely well. So much so that you wonder if the two men hate each other in real life but they probably don't. They're probably great mates and golfing buddies or some such. I don't hold William Roache's skill in high regard most of the time but i sure do in this aspect of his character. IN fact, i have always enjoyed this rivalry. One will get the upper hand and the next round, the other will win the day. Ken is always seething with hate and Mike is always so cocky, enjoying it when he gets the better of his enemy and furious with humiliation when Ken beats him out. Well done, lads (That's Johnny Briggs and William Roache, not Ken and Mike!!)

Diane Johnston

Written by JULIAN ROACH Directed by CHARLES LAUDER

Friday (3500, Monday 8 February 1993)

Curly's not saying much this morning. While he sits at the breakfast table sulking, Angie comes down looking like a million dollars (or pounds) in a figure-hugging black number. He ignores her "good morning" but as she heads into the kitchen, he gazes after her, unable to take his eyes from her remarkable form. She starts chirping away about redecorating and Curly grunts his assent, anything she wants is all right with him. To Angie's frustration, when she asks for his input, he can only offer "black". She throws up her hands, "Come on Curly - I'm doing me best here - I thought you wanted to be friends!" Oh, but that isn't what he wanted - it's what he "settled for", he answers gloomily. His voice rising with emotion, he confesses that he wants *more* - he wants them to have a physical relationship! Angie starts shaking her head - she absolutely doesn't want to hear this. But he continues, "I really fancy you! It tears me apart to see you with Neil!" That's it for Angie - she announces that in that case, she'd better go. Vexed, Curly returns in anger, "Then GO! The sooner, the better!!" before slamming the door as he storms from the house.

Speaking of going, Des is in the process of leaving for work. He and Lisa linger over kisses and fond memories of the night before, along with more kisses and promises of yet more romance tonight. Finally, he tears himself away, leaving her the picture of contentment as she happily cuddles young Tom.

In the Kabin, Derek relays the disturbing news to Rita and Mavis that he's been called as a witness for the plaintiff to give evidence in the hearing over Ted's will! Mavis says simply that she doesn't think he ought to go, since he is a friend of Rita's. But, as Rita herself points out, he has no choice in the matter. "Why me?" Derek ponders with agitation. "Well, they'll want to ask you if Ted's mind was sound when he made the will", Rita explains calmly. "Well of course it was!" Derek answers forcefully. "Then, they'll ask if he exhibited any 'peculiar' behaviour *after* he made the will..." Mavis declares on her husband's behalf: "And Derek will say that he didn't!" Rita knows she can depend on Derek to defend Ted's memory but she isn't as certain that a clever barrister won't twist anything he says to give it a different meaning!

In the Corner Shop, Audreh is trying to convince Alf that she simply can't go on wearing last year's coat. "I'm a laughing stock!" she insists. He remains adamant, she needs to learn to make things last. "Oh - like Emily Bishop?" she asks sarcastically. "Emily always manages to look very sharp!" claims Alf. Concluding that there is "no hope" for him, Audreh leaves the shop without further ado, declaring that she'll just have to put a new one on the charge at Robson's. Alf does his delayed reaction thing, pausing to repeat "on the charge at Robson's!" before following her out in despair.

Ken, who has been browsing in the shop til now, comes forward to pay for his purchases, joking to Deirdre that he's helping support "Audreh's clothing appeal". Tracy pops in to ask her mother for dinner money, which Deirdre hands over none too enthusiastically. She comments that Tracy seems to be going through a lot of money these days, which reminds Tracy to ask for her bus fare too. Warding off further argument, Ken offers to give her a drive to school so that she won't need bus money.

As they drive off, Tracy admits to Ken that she's found it tough managing without the part-time job at the flower shop. She adds that she now regrets telling Mark the truth about his father but Ken, being a born sucker when it comes to Tracy's manipulations, assures her that it didn't turn out too badly, and that Maggie doesn't hold it against her.

Sally has dropped in on Lisa and it seems the two are becoming quite friendly. Over coffee, Sally admires the brochure of the beautiful house Lisa has in mind for her and Des. She mentions that she'd like to expand their little house but on Kevin's wages it doesn't seem likely. "Never mind", Lisa tells her hopefully, "You don't know what might be around the next corner - look at me and Des!" Sally asks if they've had any offers on this place and Lisa delights in telling her they have - from a young couple that looks very promising!

Tracy's in the cafe, spending her "dinner" money on arcade games when Doug Murray comes in and tears her away from her friend Debbie for a quiet word. He wants to know if *the* money is still in her account and she assures him that it is. Heaving a small sigh of relief, he asks her to meet him at 12:30 Friday, at the Building Society. The cheque should have cleared by then, he reckons. Tracy agrees to the plan and smiles after him as he rushes out again. Of course, Debbie demands to know what he wanted so Tracy starts being mysterious, saying only that he wanted to meet her at lunchtime on Friday. "Doesn't he fancy your mother?" Debbie wonders suspiciously. "He fancies *someone*!" answers Tracy with smug assuredness. (LOL - If looks could kill, the glare Debbie gives Tracy would surely have ended her life on the spot!)

As Jack emerges from the Kabin, he meets Lisa coming across from the other side of the street. They stop for a brief chat, he admiring Tommy and asking how the baby is fairing, ("teething") and she asking after Vera, ("Oh, you know Vera..."). They smile a bit awkwardly, though with genuine fondness, before going their separate ways, Jack off to the track and Lisa home with her baby.

Curly comes in from work to find Angie brewing up. Both calmer than they were this morning, he tells her he tried ringing her today at work. "I know", she answers simply. "I thought it best that we didn't talk while I was at work." He explains that he was calling to apologize, he didn't mean what he said this morning and he would rather have her for a friend than not at all. Angie isn't convinced though - that isn't what he was saying this morning! "You know I'm no good in the mornings!" he protests. The upshot is, he'd like her to stay. It would save him from having to look for someone else and he'd rather keep her as a housemate anyway. Reluctantly, she agrees but only if he's sure. Curly reckons in time he'll be fine and even assures her that there's no need to keep Neil from the house - seeing them together won't be a problem for him. In that case, she says cheerfully, she'll cook the tea to show there's no hard feelings.

After school, Ken takes Tracy to the Flower Shop. Tentatively, Tracy steps forward to tell Maggie she is sorry for telling Mark about Mike. Her anger having subsided considerably, Maggie graciously tells her it's all right, she doesn't blame her. Tracy brightens at hearing it and is even more grateful to hear that Maggie would like her to return to work. Maggie sends her into the back to put the kettle on so she can talk to Ken alone. He thanks her for her generosity, saying it's vitally important to him that she and his daughter get along - "Especially since I intend to spend the rest of my life with you!"

At home with Alma, Mike is reliving his visit with his son on the previous evening. Alma is interested to hear that he didn't allow Mark to win at bowling but she stiffens when he approaches the subject of having Mark to their home. Facing the inevitable, she tells Mike she has no objections - his son is welcome, as long as she isn't expected to "mother" him!

Doug has called round to Deirdre's to invite her out for a swank meal on Friday evening. She hesitates before accepting, remarking that she didn't think he was in a position to pay for anything so luxurious. He jokes that he could take her to a chippy instead, but she protests that she doesn't mind being treated - okay then, it's a date. Tracy comes in bursting with the news that Maggie's taken her back on. Deirdre is relieved to hear it - she won't miss having a "penniless" daughter around! "Penniless! You might be surprised at how much I have in my building society account!" mocks Tracy with a knowing look in Doug's direction.

Angie has cooked a lovely meal, a Greek version of beef stew, along with a nice salad. Curly remarks on how good it all looks and excuses himself to fetch *the* wine from the kitchen. But when he comes back in with a bottle of red, Angie suddenly loses her appetite. "You know what red wine does to me!" she says accusingly. Curly protests *that* wasn't at all what he had in mind, even offering to change it for a bottle of white. Too late, she's decided it would be best all round if she sticks to what they said this morning and just moves out. Curly counters that maybe what she really fears is "In Vino Veritas" - the wine forcing her *true* feelings for him! "Ridiculous!" snorts Angie before storming out in anger.

With the prospect of the house sale before them and their future together a mere move away, Des decides to go across to the Rovers for a bottle of plonk to celebrate. Lisa stops him - she'll go instead. Des happily resigns himself to waiting at home with the baby while she goes for the wine.

In the Rovers, Audreh is basking in compliments on her new coat, a "bargain" as distinct from "cheap", as she informs Liz in earnest. "Being a councillor's wife, I have to have an edge, you know!" she laughs brightly.

Alf has more important matters on his mind at the moment. As he and Rita sit together at a table they discuss the upcoming litigation over Ted's will. Rita tells him her worry - "What a decent barrister will do to Derek" and Alf can only nod in solemn agreement.

At the bar, Jack quips to Vera that she ought to ask Audreh for her "old" coat. Vera laughs at the notion but her face turns to stone when she sees Lisa enter. While Lisa requests a bottle of wine from Liz, Jack urges Vera to go over and talk to the girl. But Vera insists on purposefully looking away in disdain, even warning Jack that *he* had better not talk to her either! But Jack declares that he doesn't bear grudges and he now tells Vera that she is "cutting off her nose to spite her face". Stubbornly, Vera retorts, "Well it's MY face!" As Lisa leaves the pub, her mother-in-law's cold stare follows her out.

As she steps up to the curb, Lisa spots Des and Tommy peeking out the window from across the street. She waves happily at them then grapples with her wallet to replace its change. She fumbles, then drops the wallet in the street, coins spilling everywhere. As she stoops to gather them up again, a car's headlights appear from around the corner. Before Lisa can stand up to step out of the way, the car knocks her down, the bottle of wine smashing to the cobblestones. Des looks on in horrified disbelief from his front window, abandoning his station to run to her, still clutching the baby. Doug has heard the crash from Deirdre's and now races forth, pausing only long enough to see a body on the road before running into the pub to direct Liz to call an ambulance. By this time, Des has made it across and now tearfully kneels by Lisa's side calling her name softly, desperately. Streams of blood trickling over her face, she doesn't hear him as he pleads for her to think of him and her baby....

Mavis and Derek have taken Tommy from the wretched Des, still huddled over Lisa's lifeless body. Now, as they bring him into their home, they take another look at the sad scene across the road before slowly closing the front door. The patrons of the pub have gathered around and now stand by in silent shock, none of them paying any heed to the driver of the car, as he roams in aimless circles, protesting helplessly, "I didn't see her..." and, "I rounded the corner and she was suddenly there..." Rita, Audreh and Alf look on in quiet horror, and beside them, the Duckworths. Overcome with emotion as she recalls her final encounter with Lisa only moments before, Vera turns in utter despair to Jack to bury her sobbing face in his shoulder.

Liz makes her way through the crowd to Des' side, crouching down to softly tell him the ambulance is on its way. He nods his understanding but his eyes don't leave Lisa. Gently, mechanically, he implores her to "Hang on, hang on, just hang on"....

Tearfully updated by Anita Bélanger

Debbie Dawson: JENNY SIXSMITH John Hargreaves (the driver?): JOHN MIDDLETON
Stunningly written by KEN BLAKESON Astoundingly directed by BRIAN MILLS


Originally transmitted: 10, 12, 15, 17 & 19 February 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 13 - Friday 17 March 2000
Episode Numbers: 3501 - 3505

Monday (3501, Wednesday 10 February 1993)

A long day, a long vigil . . .

And it starts before the sun is even up. We focus on Mavis bringing in the papers even though it isn't her turn. Rita has heard her and appears, concerned. Mavis has spent a sleepless night filled with pangs of guilt because she hasn't treated Lisa very kindly and now she may never get to apologize. Such a ray of sunshine is RMave! Rita is confident that Lisa is young and strong and will be pushing that pram down the road before you know it. If not, Vera is the one who's got a helluva lot more to reproach herself for.

Indeed. The scene shifts across the road. Jack has been on to the hospital but there's been no change. Lisa is still unconscious. Vera clutches Terry and Lisa's wedding photo in one hand and a crumpled tissue in the other that she buries her face in periodically. Jack is more hopeful than Vera is but you can see his jaw is set and there's fear in his eyes. They both know how serious head injuries are. Then Vera starts a flight of fancy, picturing Terry by Lisa's side when she wakes up and harbouring optimistic dreams of a reconciliation and a happy ever after ending. She's sure the jail will let Terry go to see his wife on compassionate grounds and Jack can't dissuade her of it.

Des sits beside Lisa, who's pale, bettered body is lying impossibly still. (She's not on a respirator, by the way, but breathing on her own so if they tell us tomorrow that she's brain dead without having any machine helping her breathe, I'll be breathing fraud!) Anyway, Des continues in a hushed and hoarse voice, talking to her as he must have been all night, about their bright and shining future with a new house to redecorate. His eyes and cheeks are wet as he pleads with her to wake up and tells her he loves her.

Alma and Mike are up and starting their day. Alma apologizes for being a cow over the whole Mark situation though Mike rightly takes the blame. Alma is worried that Mark won't like her and she knows nothing about 11 year old boys. Neither does Mike but he figures, it's only a kid not a Martian, how hard can it be? (Indeed. My advice to the pair of them is just be yourselves and be honest with the lad)

Jack stops into the pub to beg time off to go to the hospital. This was anticipated and Liz has come in early to cover. She asks after Lisa and discovers there is yet no change. Jack tells Liz about the fairy story Vera has cooked up and personally, he hopes they donít' let Terry out. Picture it, Terry on one side of Lisa's bed and Des Barnes on the other! Something will happen all right and it won't be "no romantic reunion!" he predicts.

Back at the hospital a nurse alerts Des that there are visitors. He isn't surprised to see it's Jack and Vera quietly approach. After asking after Lisa, Jack feels he has to justify their presence and tells Des they *had* to come. Des kindly murmurs "Of course you did" but after he leaves them to see Lisa on their own, Vera snipes at Jack about justifying their presence when they have as much right as anyone to be there. Jack hushes her, for all they know Lisa can hear them! They approach the bed, horrified at the cut of her, looking so young and vulnerable. Vera finally, albeit briefly, expresses understanding for why Lisa got fed up with having a husband in the nick. It's shortlived as she shifts to wittering about Lisa and Terry settling down together and Jack sighs heavily.

We move over to the cafÈ where I think this particular storyline is meant to be the comic relief from the heavy drama unfolding but all I wanted to do was slap those cucumber slices Gail was cutting down Alma's throat for making such a big deal over what boys Mark's age were interested in and what to make him for his tea when he visits tomorrow. It's just not that important in the "big picture" is it?

Jack and Vera are now in the waiting room while Lisa's parents are in with her and the doctor. Jack is getting tired of sitting there waiting, doing nothing and thinks they should leave now the Hortons are there but Vera insists she's going to stay until Lisa wakes up. Des returns from somewhere just as Vera is talking about Terry being let out because he's her husband but Des ignores the pointed remark, repeated for his benefit. Doreen and then Jeff emerge from the ward, both shell shocked and dazed over what's happened. Des tells them that Sally's looking after Tom and he couldn't be in better hands so that's one thing less they need worry about. When Vera makes a move to comfort the distraught Doreen, Doreen hisses at her to keep away and begins to blame this all on Vera and her jail bird son. Vera shouts back that it's Des's fault and Jack starts hollering about the manic driver with Jeff adding his voice. Finally Des screams for them to shut up. Laying the blame isn't going to get Lisa well is it?

In the corner shop, Alf is taking stick from Percy for doing nothing which lead to the accident. Alf must defend himself and actually sounds like a proper politician ducking and diving the issue while covering his backside. Not much of a local councilor who wouldn't do anything when his constituents complained, Percy points out unhelpfully. He leaves and Alf grumbles and goes to the back. Deirdre notes to Doug that Alf is only acting that way because he really does feel badly and guilty. Doug takes the opportunity to make a date with her for tonight.

Back to the hospital. The two couples are waiting now as Lisa is being taken for more scan tests. Des updates them on Tommy's well being and Jack returns from calling the prison and tells them that Terry isn't coming. Vera doesn't think Jack impressed upon them how serious it was and is heading for the telephone when Jack stops her and explains. It wasn't the prison rules, it was Terry. Since Lisa has asked him for a divorce to be with another fella, he's decided he wants nothing to do with her. He feels bad she's hurt and hopes she gets better soon but that's it and that shuts Vera's trap up with a snap, shattering her dreams of reconciliation.

Alma grills more than just burgers. She's questioning Tracy and Debbie about pop groups and current music trends and anxiously making notes. She's got Nicky lined up for sports information after that. Debbie turns to Tracy to find out what's going on with Doug and Tracy tells her she's cashing a cheque for Doug and planning on making him take her to a wine bar for lunch as repayment for the favour. She'll even bring street clothes to change into and wants to borrow a mini skirt of Debbie's so she's coming over tonight to try it on.

Mid afternoon, Sally peers through the window and sees Des arrive home and calls out to him. He threads his way through the traffic to come across. Sally asks after Lisa and offers him a bite to eat. He declines, is only home to shower and shave before going back. He looks shattered with deep lines in his face and bags under his eyes. He tells Sally he can handle the lack of sleep. What he can't handle is the battleground between the Horton's and the Duckworths!

It's after school now and after tea too I am guessing because we'll soon see that it's dark outside. Tracy lets her mother know she's spending the night at Debbie's and on her way out, meets with Doug on the doorstep. She reminds him of their date. "Eh?" oh right, the cheque thing (but he still doesn't twig to the fact that she's got a crush on him) she takes her fantasies and goes off and Doug goes inside. When Deirdre tells him they have the house to themselves for the night, he acquires a glitter in his eye and suggests a takeaway and a bottle of wine and she as much as invites him to stay the night, with an equal glitter in her eye. Or is that the studio lights reflected off those glasses! ;)

Jack is now at work answering inquiries from Rita and Mavis. Liz offers to take over if he would rather be at the hospital but he would rather stay busy than sit helplessly doing nothing. Angie asks Neil if she can stay the night at his place giving him a little glitter as well. She runs back home to fetch a few things and Neil and Kevin have a quick drink while he waits for her. Back home Curly is cooking chili, Angie's favourite, though he says he hasn't made any for her. There is enough to share though but his face falls when he finds out she's spending the night at Neil's.

Alma is busy in her kitchen too, memorizing sports statistics and who plays for what team while she's fixing tea. There's a forest of yellow post-it notes on the wall beside her! Mike comes in and discovers her cram session and finds it highly amusing. The oven timer goes off and for someone that is supposed to be a good cook, the cookie sheet of gingerbread men have ended up looking like lumpy monsters with eyes stuck on and twice as thick as they're supposed to be. Mike nibbles on a fist that has come away from a gingerbread arm and proclaims it the best gingerbread monster he's ever had!

Doug and Deirdre are getting very cozy and it's actually her that suggests he stay and admits it's been a long time since she's felt like a woman. He compliments her and kisses her and then picks up the wine and glasses and leads her upstairs.

Des is home for the night. His little racecar phone rings just as Kevin rings the doorbell. He lets Kevin in and finishes the call which was to put off the couple to wanted to see the house. Kevin offers support and any help he and Sally can provide but Des tells him that looking after Tom is more than enough and thanks them. Kevin, to his credit, doesnít even gripe about the extra work for Sally minding another baby! He just acts like any normal good friend in a time of crisis. Des mentions the one good thing . . . (No! No! Don't say it! . . . don't. . .) Terry has had the good sense to refuse to come and he never thought he'd be grateful to Terry Duckworth (NO! AUGH! SOPOD!)

Sure enough

Vera finally arrives home. It must be late because Jack's off work too and making a pot of tea from suspiciously un-steaming water. Vera asks after Tommy and jack tells her that the prison have phoned. Vera immediately assumes Terry's done something stupid. Depends on how you look at it, quips Jack. Terry's changed his mind and they are bringing him over to the hospital tomorrow. Vera smiles and just knew he'd see sense. Jack grimaces and it looks to me all he sees is trouble.

Down the road, Tracy creeps back into the house which is dark. She looks around and guesses her mother must be in bed. Oh, she is that! Tracy's eyes widen then her face falls and she looks gutted when she hears her mother's husky laugh and another deeper, familiar voice coming from the bedroom. Poor Kid!

Diane Johnston

Debbie Dawson: JENNIE SIXSMITH Doreen Horton: ANNIE RAITT Jeff Horton: DICKEN ASHWORTH
Written by ADELE ROSE (who else!) Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Tuesday (3502, Friday 12 February 1993)

Deirdre makes coffee for overnight guest Doug and is gobsmacked when Tracy strolls into the kitchen. Dee tries to play nonchalant, saying she thought Tracy was staying at Debbie's (she changed her mind) and asking if she stayed here all night (she did). Doug is also quite taken aback to see Tracy home, but not so taken aback that he doesn't take advantage of a few moments alone with her to arrange to meet her at 12:30 in front of the Building Society to get the cash for the cheque he deposited into Tracy's account - it should have cleared by now.

Vera calls the hospital to inquire about Lisa. While waiting she waxes eloquent to Jack about how pleased she is Terry's being allowed to visit and how wonderful it will be when Lisa opens her eyes and sees Terry by her bedside. [Vera's enthusiastic willingness to use Lisa's accident mainly as an opportunity to get her and Terry get back together is creepy at best and morbid at worst!]

Des is in the Kabin but his mind is a million miles away. Rita and Mavis ask after Lisa and send her their love, and the latter kindly says that if there's *anything* they can do, her, Derek, or Rita, just let them know. Des tells them Sally's caring for Tommy and also tells them how he sits by Lisa's bedside talking to her, telling her she's got to get better - "for little Tom."

Vera comes to Sally's door and practically demands to see Tommy. This puts the flustered Sal in an awkward position and she nervously asks if Des knows Vera's there. Vera launches into a rant about how Des isn't Tommeh's father, Terreh is, and that makes him her "flesh and blood"! Under this onslaught Sally gives up and lets Vera in.

In the cafe, Alma frets about Mark's visit tonight, not knowing what teenagers like to do or even eat, and adding for the umpteenth time, "I mean, how am *I* supposed to fit in?" Gail points out Alma works at a cafe and Mark will like what all teenagers like - chips, fish fingers, burgers, beans (really? you couldn't get a teenager here to willingly eat them short of threats or bribery) and more chips! She also assures Alma that kids today are more sophisticated than they were; Mark doesn't need a mum, he's got one, and he doesn't need a step-mum either, so Alma merely has to be his father's wife.

Deirdre tells Audreh that Doug's taking her to a posh Italian restaurant tonight for a meal. Audrey comments that they're getting rather "pally" and wonders how Tracy's reacting. She recalls that teenaged daughters can be rather awkward about their mothers having boyfriends! Dreary thinks Tracy will be okay about it, adding with unintentional irony, "There's one good thing: she likes Doug. I'm pretty sure of that, she does like him,"!

The object of Tracy's affection is at that moment pacing in front of the Building Society building glancing impatiently at his watch. Doug finally gives up and leaves.

In T'Rovers, Curly asks Liz if Angie's been in and ends up getting quite flustered and insisting he wasn't looking for her, there's no message, and if she does come in he WASN'T asking after her! Elsewhere there are more strange seekings as Doug asks Kev if Tracy Barlow has been looking for *him*. Kevin says no, but Doug can ask her mother, there she is right now! "Not a word, Kev," warns Doug as he goes and has a friendly chat with Deirdre, who's spotted him. They confirm their date.

Des is at Lisa's bedside. He's been crying. He assures her that Tom is fine, Sally is doing a great job, but Tom misses her. "He needs you, Lis," whispers Des. "So do I." In the ICU Nursing Station, Sister Woods gets a phone call and comes to see Des. She asks if he could wait outside for awhile. "It's just another visitor to see her," she says.

In the waiting area, Vera leaps up in joy as Terry comes in, accompanied by two Prison Officers. She berates the two escorts as they cut short her tearful hugs so that Terry can get on with what they brought him for.

Des and Terry come face-to-face in the waiting room as Des exits the ICU. "What's *he* doing here?" asks Des. "HE's her husband!" shouts Vera. "YOU've got no legal reason to be here!" The Nurse tells Vera she wants "none of that here". Terry goes into the room and the distraught Des tells the Nursing Sister that Lisa wouldn't want Terry in there. Sister Wood replies with a sympathetic shrug in her voice that Terry *is* still married to Lisa. "Yes, he IS her husband, you know!" sneers Vera. She twists the knife by adding in a voice dripping with disgust, "*You* - you're a NOTHING!"

In Lisa's room, one of the officers handcuffs Terry to Lisa's bedframe. The guards step back to give Terry as much privacy as possible under the circumstances. Terry gazes at her steadily, his thoughts inscrutable as he gazes at his former lover, now-estranged wife, and mother of his child.

More recriminations in the waiting room where Jack and Jeff & Doreen Horton have also arrived. Jeff wonders why he must wait to visit his own daughter when "that fella's" in there with her. "Excuse me," says Vera. "RTerreh has more right than anybody to be in there! She's his wife, in'she?" "Oh, come on, Vera," says Des tiredly. "That's not true any more. Might be true on a piece of paper but that's all." Doreen tells Des not to upset himself - "it won't do RLisa any good." "What are you siding with 'im for?" demands Vera. "She married RTerreh, not him!" She follows with a snide remark about people not believing their marriage vows anymore. "Don't argue with her," Jeff advises his wife. "You can't argue with folk like that anyway." This prompts Jack, who has so far kept out of it, to respond. "What you talkin' about, 'folk like that'? You looking for a good pasting, pal, or what?" "Oh yeah?" Jeff replies to the challenge. "Think you're up to the job, do ya?"

"For Christ's sake, STOP IT!" pleads Des. "Will you listen to us? Lisa's fighting for her life in there!"

The Sister comes into the waiting room and reports there's no change. She is followed by Terry, who immediately begins berating Des. "She wrote to me about you," he sneers. Des says he doesn't want to argue. "Said you were the best thing that ever happened to her," Terry continues with sarcasm. "Really looked after her, didn't ya?" Des looks wounded but still says he won't argue with Terry. Terry wants to do more than argue, however, and he lunges at Des. The Prison Officers restrain him as Vera screams and hits Jack, who's sitting dejectedly with arms crossed, urging him to leap into the fray. The Officers drag Terry physically out of the room and down the hall as he shouts "You wait! You wait!...I'll show you if it's the last thing I do!"

In the sudden calm after the storm, Jeff and Doreen ask to see their daughter and go into her room. "Are you happy now? Are you satisfied?" Vera says, ready to have another go at Des. Jack tiredly tells her to leave it. "Can't you see what's happened to our family?" Vera asks her husband, anguished. "Can't you? They've dragged RTerry back to prison. RTommy's with a childminder and they're tryin' to keep his mother alive on a support machine! And you want me to leave it?"

"Vera," Des says gently, "I understand how you feel, and I'm sorry."

"Go away," says Vera, her voice trembling with exhaustion and anger. "Go away!"

Alma's fussing over the table setting when Mike and Mark arrive. Mike introduces Mark but Alma points out that they have met, in the Cafe. There is some nervous discussion of what Mark should call Alma. She jokes that in the Cafe she answers to anything, "hey you" or "oi!", but her friends call her "Alma". Alma it is, then. She is still extremely nervous as she tells Mark she's making chips and he has his choice of fish fingers or beef burgers. "Fish fingers, please," says the lad. "And I'll have a couple of beef burgers," adds Mike. "You'll have fish fingers same as Mark. You're not in Cafe now," Alma says without taking her eyes off Mark, with the amusing abruptness of someone severely distracted and anxious! She goes to prepare the meal. Mark takes off his coat and looks around. "Was you married to Alma when you met me mum?" he asks Mike suddenly. "No - why do you ask?" replies Mike, taken aback. "Just wondered." [Alma overhears this exchange from the kitchen and her expression looks just like what I'm thinking - Gail said kids today were more sophisticated, but blimey!]

Deirdre, in a nice black dress, lets Doug in. She's just finishing her nails in preparation of their fancy dinner. Doug asks if Tracy's home. No, says Deirdre, she's at her job at the flower shop. Uh-oh... about that date. Doug says the money he was expecting fell through, and would she mind if they postponed the date? Yes she would mind, replies Deirdre - she should have known this would happen! She is really very disappointed.

Angie arrives home to find that Curly has made tea - one of Bettabuy's line of gourmet _single_ servings. He didn't cook for her, he says pointedly, because he didn't know if she'd be home. She says of course she'd be home - she lives there. "When it suits you!" Curly retorts. "Well, that's what home is for, Curly," replies Angie. "To live in as and when it suits you." She accuses Curly of getting "all uptight" and acting childish. He declares he's going to the pub and walks out, slamming the door behind him.

In the pub, it seems Dreary has forgiven Doug enough to accompany him to the Rovers. He apologizes yet again and they banter affectionately. Elsewhere, Jack talks to Rita and says that Vera's taking the situation hard. He confides how awkward it is, with the staff treating Des as Lisa's husband. Rita points out that Lisa does live with Desmond - what are they do to? Jack knows this is the reality of the situation.

Mike, Alma and Mark play - what else? - Monopoly! Mark cleans Mike out, to Mike's delight. The hour's getting on and Mike tells Mark to get his coat for the trip home. He remarks to Alma that the lad has a good head on his shoulders and plays a mean game of Monopoly. "Wonder where he gets that from?" muses Alma. Mike earnestly thanks Alma - for being there, for the meal, for making Mark feel at home. As Dad and Lad prepare to leave, Mark says cheerfully, "Bye, Alma. And thanks very much." "Oh, my pleasure, Mark," she replies warmly. "My pleasure."

Des is back at Lisa's bedside. He has again been weeping. As soon as she gets better, he promises the still form, they'll go on a holiday, the three of them. Somewhere hot, he promises. "You, me, and little Tom. Put him to bed," he goes on heartbreakingly, "and I'll hold you all night. Just hold you...I love you, Lisa..." As he speaks, our attention has shifted to the vital signs monitor, which has begun showing erratic heart and brain waves. Suddenly alarms go off. Nurses run into the room and brusquely usher the frightened Des out. A Nurse begins doing chest compressions.

Des wanders like a lost soul into the waiting room. He seems stunned, detached. Vera gathers her purse and coat, preparing to take her turn at Lisa's bedside. "I don't think you can go in," Des says absently. "Don't tell me not to go in," Vera says stroppily. "It's not down to you! By rights you shouldn't -"

"No," interrupts Des, "I'm tellin' you. I think there's something wrong." "What do you mean?" asks Vera. "Don't know - and they haven't got time now to answer questions, have they? Don't want to get under their feet..." They look at each other, frightened.

In Lisa's room, Doctors and Nurses come running and swarm around her bed. The defibrillator pads are prepared and placed on her chest.

Tracy's listening to headphones when Deirdre and Doug return to Deirdre's house. Did they enjoy their meal, she asks disingenuously. They didn't go, says Deirdre. "**Short of money**, see, Trace," adds Doug pointedly. As soon as Deirdre steps out of the room he pounces on Tracy. She claims that she called the bank and they said the cheque hadn't cleared yet, so she didn't meet Doug. He complains that he stood waiting for her. "Sorry," she says, unconvincingly enough so that we know she's not *really* sorry, but not so sarcastically that Doug will know for sure if she's toying with him. A dangerous game, RTracy's playing! As soon as that cheque clears, warns Doug, she's to get him that money - "chop chop"!

Des paces in the waiting room. He comments that Vera looks exhausted. He suggests she go home and he'll ring if there's any change. She snaps bitterly that she's staying and she doesn't want any favours from him, so stop offering! A Doctor comes to the door of the ICU.

"Mr. Barnes?" he asks. "It's *my* turn to sit with her!" protests Vera. "Mr. Barnes, please," repeats the Doctor. Des follows him into the ICU. Vera stews.

In the Intensive Care Unit, Des is met by the Doctor and a Nurse. "What's happening?" he asks. "We're sorry... we've lost her," says the Doctor. "We did everything we could do," adds the Nurse gently. "We're very sorry," repeats the Doctor.

Des looks stricken as his face registers what they're saying. The Doctor nods at the Nurse, who ushers the Des to Lisa's bedside where she lies perfectly still.

"Lis!" Des sobs as he falls over her body. He raises his head to look at her before kissing her on the mouth.

ronniecat

Sister Woods: POLLY HIGHTON Prison Officer: MAX SMITH Doreen Horton: ANNIE RAITT Jeff Horton: DICKEN ASHWORTH Dr. Donaldson: MARTIN REEVE
Written by JOHN STEVENSON Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Notes on credits: Unlike some episodes which end with the death of a major character, the regular theme music was played at the end of this episode.

One of the saddest Coronation Street episodes I have ever seen. : (

Wednesday (3503, Monday 15 February 1993)

...where we get to see the best and the worst of certain people!

At the Duckworth's, Jack hasn't had time to finish his first cup of tea before he realizes that Vera is preparing to go to Sally's place to collect Tommy. He assumes that Vera is planning to take the baby for the day, and points out that Sally is doing a good job of taking care of Tommy, but Vera is determined that Tommy will come and live with them now that Lisa is dead. Her biggest concern is that Des will get to Tommy before she does. Jack rolls his eyes, but Vera snarls at him that Tommy is their flesh and blood and shouldn't be with strangers.

Angie comes into the darkened living room, where Curly is just waking up on the couch. Des spent the night there, and Curly insisted that he sleep in his room. Angie apologizes for going to bed when she did -- she just couldn't stay awake -- but Curly tells her that it's alright. As it was, he stayed up half the night, trying to comfort Des. Angie offers to make some coffee and take a cup up to Des, but Curly thinks it's best to let him sleep.

Vera arrives at Sally's place and asks to see Tommy. Sally explains that he's still sleeping, and she was just about to wake him and give him his breakfast. Vera tells her not to bother -- instead, she should gather his belongings, as Vera will take him home and give him his breakfast there. Sally is hesitant to turn the baby over to Vera, and offers to bring him over after she's fed the child, but Vera insists that she'll take him now.

Des comes down after very little sleep, but refuses breakfast when Angie offers to make him something to eat. He thanks Curly for giving up his bed, and Curly responds that he's welcome to stay as long as he wants. Des is still in shock, unable to believe that Lisa is dead, and he can't face going back to his own place -- there are just too many memories there. Curly offers to go across and get Des some clean clothes and his shaving gear, and Des gratefully accepts. Breaking into tears, he admits that his new home has brought him nothing but grief -- first Steph, and now Lisa. He wishes that he'd left Lisa where she was -- at home, with her parents. Lisa's death was all his fault as far as he's concerned, because he wanted her and Tommy to live with him. "I destroy everything I touch," he weeps.

Back home with Tommy, Vera tells Jack that they need to go shopping for clothes for the baby. Jack is flabbergasted, since he knows that Tommy has everything he needs at Des' place, but Vera won't "grovel" by asking Des for his things. Jack's pointed observation of Vera's plan is that she's "off her trolley." Now that he understands her intention to keep Tommy, he demands to know how she expects to do that. After all, caring for a little lad takes money and loads of energy, and Vera is no longer a young woman. Vera snaps at him that she knows all sorts of older women who are caring for their grandchildren, so "get used to the idea!"

At Curly's, Des comes downstairs after having shaved and put on clean clothes. He mourns the impact Lisa's death will have on Tommy; she loved him so much, but Des fears that Tommy won't remember his mom when he grows up. He decides to go to Sally's to check on Tommy, and Angie offers to accompany him. Outside, they encounter Jack and Vera with the baby, just about to get into Vera's car. An horrific showdown follows, as a shocked Des tells Vera that she has no right to take Tommy. Vera screams back that she has every right, and tells Des that as far as she's concerned, he ought to be on "his knees," begging God's forgiveness because it's his fault that Lisa is dead. Angie is mortified, and tries to stop the tongue-lashing, but Vera strikes out at her, telling her to "never mind." "If he'd have left her alone 'til our Terry got back to his family, he'd still have a wife now and this baby would still have a mother. You killed her, and it'll be on your conscience for the rest of your life. So keep away from us. Keep away from that baby, and KEEP AWAY FROM ME -- or I'll swing for you, so help me!" Stunned by this cruel attack, a defeated Des turns and walks away, but Angie stands her ground and sarcastically thanks Vera for *that*, noting that it's just what Des needed. As Angie attempts to catch up with Des, Vera shrieks at her that she ought to stay away from Des and his "kiss of death."

Whew! On a lighter note, Tracy pops into the Corner Shop. She needs to catch a bus at 11:45, but for now, all she really wants is a packet of gum. Deirdre assumes that Tracy is there for money, but Tracy half-jokingly states that she's "loaded," prompting Alf to admit that he wouldn't mind a loan of a few thousand quid. Tracy says that wouldn't be a problem (she's referring to Doug's money in her building society account), and when Deirdre wishes she had a few extra quid, Tracy tells her that "a virtuous woman's worth is far above rubies." Deirdre suspects that Tracy is getting in yet another dig about her past and Mike Baldwin, but Tracy assures her that it's just a scripture passage she learned at school (yeah, right).

As Tracy leaves the Corner Shop and heads for the bus stop, Doug sees her and dashes across to have a word. At first Tracy pretends that she doesn't know what he wants, but when he reminds her that he's in dire need of the money in her account, she tells him she can't go now. She has to get to school and will see him later. Doug has no choice but to agree. Back at MVB Motors, Kevin is curious about their discussion, and Doug claims it had to do with Tracy coming home unexpectedly the night he spent with Deirdre.

At Curly's, Angie has been filling him in on the fracas on the street, noting that the least Vera could have done was tell them where they were taking the baby. Meanwhile Des has been upstairs for the past two hours, and Angie decides that she'd better go and see how he's doing. When she checks Curly's bedroom, she finds that Des isn't there.

Lisa's death is the topic of conversation up and down the street, and at the Rover's Return, Bet sadly reflects on the fact that Lisa was "nowt but a kid," and that poor little Tommy isn't off to a good start in life with his dad in jail and his mom dead. Raquel admits that she feels terribly guilty now because she told Lisa that getting involved with Des would "end in tears."

There's been no response to their knocking on Des' door, so Angie and Curly go around the back and look through the kitchen window. They finally conclude that he isn't there and are concerned about what he might do. The thought occurs to them that he may have gone to see Steph, but Curly remembers that Des doesn't know her address. Angie thinks he might have gone back to the canal where he burned his boat, but Curly can't believe he'd do something "daft." They decide to get Curly's car and look for him.

Phyllis goes into the Cafe and tells Gail that she's sick of eating on her own, so decided to treat herself. After lunch, she plans to go to the hospital to see Lisa. Gail and Alma exchange startled glances before Gail breaks the news of Lisa's death. Phyllis bursts into tears, wondering why such a dreadful thing had to happen, and she's naturally concerned about Des. Curly bursts into the Cafe, and interrupting Phyllis, asks Gail if she knows where Des docked (and burned) his boat. Gail gives him the information, and Phyllis offers to accompany Curly on the search. Unfortunately, Curly is too alarmed about Des to give Phyllis much consideration, and he flatly says no before rushing off.

At the Rover's Return, Doug and Deirdre partake of Betty's hot pot while Doug promises a fancier dinner sometime soon. Deirdre tells him that she isn't complaining, as long as she enjoys the company she has while eating simpler fare, but she is worried about Tracy. From what she can tell, she isn't the "flavour of the month" in Tracy's books, and Tracy has been acting very mysteriously recently -- "very enigmatic," with a "knowing smile." Doug is obviously uncomfortable, wondering if Tracy wants her mother to learn about the cheque, and is relieved when he hears that Tracy's behaviour has more to do with him spending the night. Since Tracy is young and "impressionable," Deirdre feels they need to be more careful in the future.

Back at the Cafe, Phyllis is worried that Des might do something foolish, so Gail and Alma do their best to reassure her. They suggest that she go home, and promise that if they hear anything, they will call her.

Phyllis passes Mike as he leaves, and when she doesn't respond to his greeting, he asks Alma what's wrong. Alma reminds him that Lisa died, and that Phyllis just learned the news. Mike turns his attention to Mark, who is in the Cafe with Nicky. He tells Mark they're going "somewhere" in his Jaguar, but he refuses to divulge the destination.

Phyllis is in the process of unlocking her door when she hears her name called. Des steps forward and asks if he can come in.

Vera is showing Ivy the new outfits she bought for Tommy. Ivy admires them, but can't believe that Lisa didn't have enough clothes for the child -- she gets the same line, that Vera is not about to ask Des for Tommy's belongings. Ivy wonders how Vera is going to cope with child-minding and her job at Bettabuys, but before Vera can respond, Jack sarcastically quips that Vera plans to quit her job, which Lord knows, they can well afford. Vera angrily tells him that money isn't everything, and as far as she's concerned, she doesn't have a choice -- Tommy is family.

Jack escorts Jeff Horton into their living room, and Ivy decides that this would be a good time to leave. When Jeff leans over to speak to his grandchild, who is lying on the couch, Vera snatches him up in her arms. Jeff admits that Doreen (his wife) is still in shock over the news, but that both of them wanted to be sure that Tommy was alright. Vera assures him that they have nothing to worry about -- Tommy is in good hands. Her eyebrows nearly disappear into her hair when Jeff asks her to get Tommy ready so that he can take him home!

At Phyllis' house, she tells Des that she was worried sick that he might do something silly. Des expresses again his feeling that he's to blame for Lisa's death. In tears, Phyllis tells him that she had a daughter Margaret, who would have been 48 that year, had she lived. She died 17 years ago. She discovered a lump, but Phyllis wanted to convince herself that there were good lumps and bad lumps, and that the one Margaret had wasn't anything to worry about. Consequently, Margaret didn't go to a doctor about it, and Phyllis didn't encourage her to seek medical advice. When Margaret finally did have surgery, it was too late. Now she blames herself. Des reminds her that it wasn't her fault -- she didn't cause Margaret's cancer. "Exactly!" responds Phyllis -- "and you didn't knock Lisa down." Phyllis realizes that they both need something stronger than tea for this sad occasion, but decides that she'll call Curly first, to let him know that Des is safe and sound. She resolves to give Vera a piece of her mind the next time she sees her, and tells Des that contrary to what Vera said, a lot of people care about him.

Back at the Duckworths' home, Vera flatly tells Jeff that he can't have Tommy. Out of patience, Jeff tells her that he has a lot of things on his plate, arranging Lisa's funeral, so all he wants to do is to take Tommy back to Southampton -- after all, Tommy is his daughter's baby. Vera's doesn't want to be cruel, but she reminds Jeff that Lisa is dead, while Terry is still alive -- and Tommy is Terry's son. Jeff insists he won't leave without the baby, while Vera insists that *this* is his home, and he isn't going anywhere. As the argument escalates, Jeff claims guardianship on the grounds that the baby was living with them until very recently, and when Vera won't be swayed by that, he wonders what sort of a life Tommy could have with them, with "a jailbird for a dad, and grandparents who don't have a halfpenny." On hearing that insult, Jack angrily snaps into action, telling Jeff "you might have the money, but we've got our pride, and our rights -- and our rights say that that little lad stops with us and that's the end of it." As the men begin to push and shove each other, Jeff warns that he won't give in "that easily." "I'll have him in the end," he vows as he slams his way out of the house. "OVER MY DEAD BODY" Vera screams after him. Hugging little Tommy close to her chest, she reiterates "over my dead body" softly to the child.

Heather Morlan

Jeff Horton: DICKEN ASHWORTH
Written by KEN BLAKESON Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Thursday (3504, Wednesday 17 February 1993)

Vera and Jack munch on breakfast. In fact, Elizabeth Dawn played the whole scene nearly, with her mouth stuffed with toast. It made following Vera's fractured logic al that much harder! Ok, here goes and the subject of course is Lisa. Vera is mumbling that no matter what Lisa did, she were their flesh and blood ... in-law. Jack looks at her, amazed, while she was alive, Vera called her a slut, a tart and damn near hit her! Course she did, Vera nods her head, she wasn't trying to say Lisa were perfect! She needed a good hiding but that isn't to say Vera didn't love her! (What is it they say, with friends like these, who needs enemies?) Vera reckons Lisa just go in with a bad fella, didn't she? Our Terry, Jack says with conviction, aye. No!!! Vera explodes, that Des Barnes... she hisses. The conversation turns to the cost of the funeral because Vera is determined that they will foot the bill though Jack thinks perhaps they could go halves with the Horton's. Vera's pride won't allow that though. Vera hollers and pounds the table and the baby's rattle goes flying and nearly hits Tommy on the head! Liz Dawn stopped and looked down to make sure he was ok on the floor where, in fact, he was lying unconcerned, chewing on a soft toy. Anyway, Vera hollers at Jack for suggesting they go begging to the Hortons, She was our flesh and blood!!!

Tracy gets caught taking her bank book to school. Her mother feels she shouldn't in case she loses it but Tracy insists and leaves for school. Doug sees her cross the road and hurries over from the garage to mither her again about the money. Tracy insists he meet her at quarter past four and is accused of messing him around (because of course it means he'll have to beg off work early) but she drives the point home, if he wants the money he will just have to come and meet her because she's not walking through the streets with £2,000 in her bag. She's really enjoying jerking him around, you can tell, she's got a permanent smirk on her face that needs smacking off badly!

Poor Des endures a long day and a long stream of people lining up to offer their condolences. Sally first, 'If there's anything i can do'. Des feels bad that he couldn't keep Tommy out of the hands of his mad granny and Sally feels like she's been put on the spot when she really didn't feel she could NOT hand over the baby to Vera. Des apologizes and understands. Raquel is over later, offering anything she can do. You know people do mean well when they say that but it's wearing as is obvious on poor Des's face. Raquel offers her friendship and tells Des she really is going to miss Lisa too. She thought they were going to be really good mates.

Vera gets Tommy bundled into a snuggly carrier and she's off to visit Terry. Jack reminds Vera that they can't afford to keep the baby but Vera won't be told. She extracts a few words out of Jack to pass on to Terry and he reluctantly offers his condolences to his son and to be strong. And then he wipes Vera's kiss off his cheek studiously. :))

At dinner in the pub, Doug tells Kevin about his "mate" who's going to cash his cheque but keeps messing him around. This culminates in an expected request for an hour off this afternoon to sort it out. Kevin gives him a hard time but what can he really do since Doug is desperate enough even to risk his job. Deirdre and Rita arrive just then. Rita offers to buy a round for the four and they joke about rich widow's (apparently the court hearing over Ted's will is next week although i thought Rita had said she was letting them Brooks's have the lot so i'm at a loss as to why there's going to be a hearing.) Behind the bar, Bet and Raquel chat quietly about Vera's nasty attitude towards Lisa. Raquel wonders if Vera would have been so harsh if she knew the future. Bet reckons so, Vera is an equal opportunist and will not care whose back she gets up.

Meanwhile, Vera is at the prison sitting at a table across from Terry. He doesn't seem overly upset at the death of his wife and even asks wryly how "her bloke" is. Vera begs him to let it go even though he hates Des. Terry shrugs slyly, asking what could he do inside anyway? Vera narrows her eyes and notes that he managed before, which jolts Terry into looking around to see who's listening and loudly protesting that he doesn't know what she means. First bit of emotion we've seen out of him and all! What a piece of work he is! Vera tells him that the Hortons wanted to take Tommy but she wasn't letting him go. Why not? Terry asks, shocking Vera momentarily. Let them have him if they want him, Terry offers, nonchalantly, his mother doesn't want the responsibility at her age! Vera forcefully insists Terry is just griefstricken and still in shock, not thinking straight. Am i not? He asks, "she left ME" and stating matter-of-factly that he wouldn't have her back anyway, that you don't take slags back. Vera gasps and again insists he's just not thinking straight and anyway, he's still alive and Tommy's his son, and she'll make sure the wardens and parole board know Terry's got a little orphaned baby on the outside. This thought perks Terry's attitude up considerably and he points out one good reason not to let the Hortons have Tommy. Because they want him. Yeah, Mum, you keep him and look after him, and that'll get right up their noses won't it? Vera ignores this selfish attitude and makes excuses for him as usual, painting a new story for herself of Terry, a single Dad, earnestly making a new life for himself and his son.

In the Kabin, Mavis is peering through the display window, watching Jack's movements and worried that he or Vera could come into the Kabin. She doesn't know what she will say. Rita tells her just say what she feels or doesn't she know? Mavis does know what she feels but wonders if the Duckworth's would want to hear it since they were at loggerheads while Lisa was alive. Rita, quickly getting exasperated, sarcastically quips that Mavis isn't likely to be pleased s punch and have you bought any roast ham? Just tell them you're sorry! Or say nothing if she thinks she'll say the wrong thing! Mavis is appalled, never thought Rita of all people would be flippant about death. Rita turns away and mutters, "I've had enough practice with it". Just as Mavis is about to have another look, she spies Jack making his way toward the Kabin door and nearly flies to the back of the counter, arms flailing like a windmill in her haste. Jack enters and Rita passes on her condolences. Jack is there to get a black bordered thank you card and Rita helps him pick one out, listening to his words about the funeral. There's so much to do isn't there and then there's food to sort out though you wouldn't really think of eating at a time like this would you, he asks Rita. (are you ready for this?) Mavis pipes up from the back of the counter, Have you thought about a roasted ham? They're very convenient! (hahahahahaha! You *know* she wouldn't have said it had Rita not put it in her mind minutes since!) Rita gives her a withering glance and Mavis visibly shrinks and retreats into the back room! (cracked me up!)

Ivy is sitting in the cafe and has been for quite some time. Gail is concerned and decides to take the plunge and ask her what's on her mind. Ivy is concerned about Des and wonders if she should go visit. Gail says hesitantly (knowing there is more to this than what meets the eye) that it would be nice but she doesn't know Des that well. Sure enough the real motive comes out. Ivy has had experience losing loved ones and would have been totally lost had she not had her faith in God to get her through and she thought Des might be comforted by that. Gail holds back her alarm and is very tactful, telling Ivy that Des might take it the wrong way, not knowing her well and he isn't very religious. That's just when you need it most, Ivy protests and she wouldn't be interfering. Gail knows that but Des, not knowing Ivy well might not and you wouldn't want to upset him. Ivy seems to agree but there's a shifty determined look in her eye.

Tracy, as expected doesn't show up at the bank and Doug is stuck waiting there for an hour or more.

Back home again, Vera, another mouthful of food clouding her words, tells Jack over their tea that Terry was gutted and insisted that they keep Tommy. Jack seems surprised.

Angie and Curly buy a bottle of plonk at the pub to take over to Des's. Jack tells them to let Des know that he won't be welcome at the funeral though he insists, it's not a threat, just a suggestion (knowing how Vera would react and that Terry will probably be there). Mike questions Kevin about Doug's absences and is told that Doug is a good worker and just needs to sort out his money problems.

Which aren't over yet. Doug arrives at Number 1, ostensibly to ask Deirdre out to the Rovers but really to tear into Tracy again. Seems she had detention which he doesn't believe for a minute and neither do i. This time she tells him he has to meet her at a wine bar tomorrow night and she'll give him his money then. He can't, he was supposed to take her mother out but again, if he doesn't meet her, he can't get her money. Why he just doesn't tell Deirdre the whole story since she knows about the cheque to begin with i don't know.

Ivy did indeed go to see Des and Des is fending off her offerings with admirable restraint. She earnestly discusses turning to God in times like this especially if you aren't normally religious and offers to pray with him, on their knees no less! Des nearly loses his eyebrows into this hairline at this suggestion and leaps up at the sound of knocking at the door. Ivy excuses herself when Angie and Curly arrive and Des sighs with relief. Poor Des is feeling got at and in a vacuum, with no future beyond the funeral. Curly and Angie look at each other with dread and broach the subject. Surely he isn't going to the funeral? Course he is, Des insists, he doesn't know much about bereavement but he knows you must go to the funeral, toss earth on the coffin, see them off and try to get on with your life. He has to go, he has no choice. "Oh boy" says the look Curly and Angie pass.

Diane Johnston

Receptionist: CLAUDIA SERMBEZIS
Written by STEPHEN MALLATRATT Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Friday (3505, Friday 19 February 1993)

Final farewells on the Street today as Lisa Duckworth is laid to rest.

Vera's made arrangements for Tommy to stay with "Auntie Sally" while they're gone and now cautions Jack that they won't be staying around after because she can't predict what "them 'Ortons" might do. Jack thinks it's silly to rush back, the Hortons will be at the funeral after all and anyway, he reckons they'd be as "welcome as a pig at a picnic" at the after-reception! Vera reminds him that the main thing is that they give Lisa a proper send off, after all, she "were R Turry's wife". Jack says he isn't likely to forget that fact since he'll be paying for it for the rest of his life!

Des too is thinking ahead to the funeral. Angie calls over to try to persuade him to stay away but he won't hear of it. Despite her warnings of how the Duckworths will respond to his presence, he insists on going to pay his last respects to the girl he loved.

Sally drops into the Corner Shop to show Alf and Deirdre the letter she's just receieved from the town council. A week too late to save Lisa Duckworth's life, the battle has been won and traffic on the Street will be curtailed. Deirdre wonders if the council's decision was owing to Lisa's death but Alf thinks it had more to do with Sally's campaign. He congratulates her on a job well done but Sally laments that it isn't much comfort to Lisa, or the ones she left behind!

When Curly arrives at No6, Des jumps to the conclusion that he, like Angie before him, has come to attempt to talk him out of attending Lisa's funeral. But no, as Curly explains, he wanted to come with Des. Surprised and touched, Des assures him there is no need but Curly remains firm. He was best man at their wedding, after all, he points out.

At the garage, Kev and Doug are working as fast as they can to meet a 2 pm deadline. Mike pops in to have the Jag serviced and starts grilling Doug over his recent absence. Doug offers that he couldn't help it, it's this money he's been waiting on. Mike is surprised to hear the cheque still hasn't been cashed. When he makes a snide remark about Doug's "friends", Doug retreats to the engine he's been working on in annoyance.

At the cemetery, Des and Curly remain a respectful distance in the background while the grave-side ceremony concludes. As the minister pronounces the final prayer, Lisa's parents thank him and the crowd starts to disperse. Terry, shackled and accompanied by two prison guards, moves to leave but Vera urges him to let out his feelings. Unmoved, he tells her he feels "nothing", that this Lisa was not "his" Lisa, not the girl he married. "She kicked me in the teeth when I was down, Mum." Vera pleads that he shouldn't blame Lisa for what happened. "It's that Des - it's *his* fault!" she insists. Terry still has nothing to say and continues moving away but turns back to see Des and Curly approach. As Angie predicted, all hell breaks loose. Terry strains to break free of his guards, shouting ugly threats at Des. Doreen Horton winces at the commotion and chastises Des for coming. Vera jumps into the fray, "You just couldn't keep away, could ya?!" Des answers meekly that he had to come, he loved Lisa. "Love!" shouts Vera, "You couldn't even let her be buried in peace - that's how much *you* loved her!" As the guards drag Terry away, Des tearfully approaches her grave.

In the Rovers, Rita confesses to Alf how worried she is about the coming trial. He readily offers to go with her if she'd like him to and she readily accepts.

Elsewhere in the bar, Bet serves Kevin and asks where his partner (Doug) is. Kevin explains how busy they are at the garage and she cracks a joke about Mike being ever the slave driver.

Raquel accidentally short-changes Deirdre and by way of an apology explains that she's preoccupied with thoughts of Lisa Duckworth. Deirdre quite understands as she is too. Raquel says it's Des she feels rotten for - Terry still has his son and Jack and Vera still have their grandson but what has Des got?

Still at Lisa's grave, Des stands over it for some time, Curly quietly by his side. After a spell, Curly says he'll wait in the car to give them some time alone. Locked in his isolation of sadness, Des talks to Lisa, telling her how much he loved her and how wonderful their future would have been. He regrets not having the time to show her what she meant to him and with a final blessing, he tosses down the single red rose he's been clutching. It comes to rest on her coffin, over the brass plate which commemorates her brief time on this earth: "Lisa Duckworth - At Rest - 12th February 1993 - Aged 22 Years".

In the Kabin, Deirdre comments to Mavis that the Duckworths are already back from the funeral. Mavis speculates that Vera doesn't know what she's taking on with young Tommy and Deirdre comments she might be better off not knowing. As she leaves, Mavis tries to engage Rita in conversation but finds her distracted by thoughts of the trial. She worries that Derek will buckle under the pressure of Ted's family's solicitor but Mavis seems confident that Derek won't cave in to "browbeating".

Doug spots Tracy on her way home from school and rushes from the garage to intercept her. She assures him that he'll get his money but reiterates her demand that he take her for a drink first. He can't, he explains - he has a date tonight with her mother! But Tracy knows she holds the cards and remains firm. He'll meet her at half seven at Minsky's or he won't get his money.

The "Terrible Twosome" as Gail calls them, Mark and Nicky, happen into the cafe after school for some refreshment. As she serves them some orange juice, Gail hears that Mike is planning to take Mark ice-skating and that Nicky is invited to come along. She protests that he hasn't got the gear but on hearing it can be hired, she relents, acknowledging with a grin that a "no" answer wouldn't make her very popular.

In the aftermath of the funeral, the Duckworths, now home again with Tommy, discuss what the future holds. Vera ignores Jack's pleas that without her income they won't be equal to the struggle. He tries to reason with her, what they are taking on amounts to a life-long commitment! But Vera won't discuss it - she can only consider what *her* life will be like if she gives up her grandson to "them 'Ortons"!

Having a coke in the cafe, Debbie complains to Tracy that the two boys who just left were well worth pursuing. She wonders what's wrong with Tracy that she isn't interested. "They're only kids!" Tracy answers. She goes on to say that Doug is a *real* man and has more to offer a "woman". Debbie is skeptical to think Doug has any interest in her friend, it's Deirdre he's hanging around for, she maintains. "Oh yeah?" counters Tracy, "Well then why is he breaking a date with me mum to take me out tonight?" she gloats.

In the face of Tracy's ultimatum, a discouraged Doug goes into the corner shop to break his date with Deirdre. She handles the news well, even cracking that "She is probably rich and half my age", a remark which causes Doug to swallow hard at the unintended irony!

As Jack prepares to leave for the chippy (for what, as he reminds Vera, may be the last time) he is intercepted at the door by the Hortons. Jeff explains that they are here for "unfinished business" and Jack defensively tries to shut them out but the push past him to gain entry. Vera calls out from the sitting room to inquire who it is and on hearing that it's Tommy's other grandparents, her hold on the baby tightens. As they enter the room, Lisa's parents state their business, they are there for "R Tommy". Vera tells them they've had a wasted journey but as Doreen points out, they also are Tommy's grandparents and they have as much right to him as Jack and Vera. When Vera argues that R Turry has left them in charge of the baby, Doreen points out that it's expensive to bring a child up, and that she and Jeff can offer him more. Vera snorts that money doesn't matter - they can love him as well as anyone but Jack thinks if the Hortons are offering to contribute, they should hear them out. Vera refuses to even negotiate and tells Jeff and Doreen to get out, they are wasting their time. With a promise that it's not over, Mr. Horton leads his tearful wife out.

In the Rovers, Derek and Mave discuss Rita's fears over the upcoming hearing. Mavis relays how worried Rita is that Derek won't be up to the cross-examination but he cockily tells her it's all in hand. If that solicitor thinks he'll strengthen their case against Rita, he's made a big error in judgement!

Curly and Angie come in to the pub, after unsuccessfully trying to drag Des out with them, as they explain to Raquel. Everyone's heard about the fracas at the cemetery by now and Angie comments that she did warn Des this would happen if he insisted on going. Raquel defends his right to go (and so do I!) after all - he gave Lisa more happiness in the brief time they had together than her husband ever did!

Deirdre arrives for a drink and wards off Bet before she can ask where Doug is... "I don't know and I don't much care!" she says cheerily.

Of course, Doug is at this moment sitting in Minsky's waiting for R Tracy Luv. When she appears, decked out in make-up, a bouffant hairdo and drop earrings, he greets her with trepidation - "I hope you brought the money..." She answers casually, "Keep your shirt on - I have it... But first, where's that drink you promised me?" Grudgingly, he moves with her to a table and obliges by getting her a drink. When she finishes, he asks again about the money, only to be told she'd like another before she hands it over. Losing patience, he tells her to stop playing games and hand the money over. Becoming nervous as his voice rises, she stammers that she hasn't got it. Heads turn as he loudly demands the money, causing her to become panicky and upset as she promises to get it for him Monday. She was only trying to find a way to spend time with him, she offers, adding that she *knows* he likes her. Sharply, he tells her he has about as much affection for her as "a starving rottweiler" and warns her to get out of his sight! Deflated at the rebuke, she retreats, bumping into the fixtures as she goes and leaving a frustrated Doug to wonder if he'll ever see his money...

Anita Belanger

Reverend Pike: JIM WHELAN Debbie Dawson: JENNY SIXSMITH
Written by BARRY HILL Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON


Originally transmitted: 22, 24, 26 February; 1 & 3 March 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 20 - Friday 24 March 2000
Episode Numbers: 3506 - 3510

Monday (3506, Monday 22 February 1993)

Poor Jack, he must be going through indigestion tablets like they were candy these days as Vera carps at him over breakfast yet again. This times it's grousing about Des showing up at the funeral and not letting Lisa be buried in peace. Jack tries to reason with her bit as usual it's no use. Vera's just glad Tommy is too young to understand. To make matters worse she then sinks into delusion again, painting pictures in the sky of Terry raising Tommy, marrying a nice girl and living close by so Vera can visit Tommy and all the other grandbabies they'll provide her with. Jack just looks like he's lost his appetite.

Doug spies Tracy and runs across to bleat angrily at her again about the money but she blows him off and runs into Alf's where she asks her mother for dinner money. Alf is discussing Ted's state of mind with Deirdre and Audrey, oh that's right, the court case is today. Tracy reminds her mum that she has hockey practice after school but she doesn't leave right away, intent on checking to see if the coast is clear of dodgey mechanics. Something tells me the crush is wearing off fast. When Deirdre asks her what she is doing, she mutters nothing and slinks off. But Doug is waiting for her and she tells him she'll meet him after school at the building society. Deirdre has popped out the shop door because Tracy's behaviour was at least noted and she sees and possibly hears Doug's plans to meet Tracy later and her suspicions are touched off.

Raquel and Bet chat about Des with Raquel wishing she could do something to help him but there really isn't much she can do (oh you'll think of something!) Jack arrives for work and is asked if Des is going to be able to see the baby because that would be helpful to ease his grief. Jack doesn't think Vera would be very likely to allow Des any access which Raquel thinks isn't fair. Des has suffered enough. Aye, quips Jack, then he won't want to suffer more will he? But cuts the conversation short and sends Jack to the cellar. Raquel sighs and wonders why people must bear grudges? (Is she over her grudge against Des then?) Bet declares human beings always do hold onto grudges, it's what keeps them going.

Back in the shop, Audrey is giving Alf his orders to look after Rita but to be careful. He always gets so bent out of shape when it comes to Rita and is likely to shoot his mouth off (it's not as if he's testifying!) Alf takes exception and then takes Deirdre's advice to get going or he'll be late. Deirdre then asks Kevin how Doug is and mentions his apparent preoccupation with Tracy. Kevin discreetly says he just thought Tracy was running messages for her mother (when he's been teasing Doug mercilessly about jail-baiting schoolgirls) Deirdre lets it pass while Audrey crassly likens Rita's possible inheritance as a little bonus since Len had left her fairly well provided for when he died.

Rita is more concerned with any surprise witnesses the Brooks's barrister might spring on them in court. Derek pledges that she won't have to worry about his testimony, he will hold steadfast and not be manipulated. Alf knows how barristers can twist everything you say, though and predicts the worst. Rita explains that they sole and only focus of the case is going to be Ted's state of mind when he made up and signed the will. The other witnesses that they are aware of are Ted's doctor and the other witness to the will signing, a shop customer, Mrs. Beverly.

LINE OF THE DAY: In the pub later, Raquel continues her quest for Des by asking Phyllis how he's really doing and does Des manage to get out much. Phyllis says "Well, he went to the funeral but that didn't seem to cheer him up and that were in Blackpool!" (*snort*)

Bet is aghast at Jack's description of Vera's flight of fancy, Terry raising his son once he is released. Seems she thinks bears or wolves would have a better instinct for looking after a baby! LOL! Deirdre stalks in to the pub, intent on a "quiet word" with Doug (why do I always seem to want to mistype his name and call him "Dog" or "Dough"? Freudian slip do you think?) She drags him over to a booth and gets right to the point, quizzing him about what he's doing sniffing around her daughter. It's not like that, he guiltily protests but she manages to drag the whole story of the illegal cheque cashing scheme out of him and gives him hell.

We're in court now, where the barrister for the Brooks family is outlining their case, hoping to prove that Ted was not thinking clearly and therefore the will is invalid. The first witness is Ted's doctor who explains Ted's medical condition and the possible side effects from the painkillers he was taking, adding that he could have been having trouble making decisions or being overly emotional. But he clearly states that Ted would have understood what he was doing with making a will and what it meant.

Mrs. Beverly takes the stand, a middle aged woman who seems like an honest soul, nervous but anxious to do the right thing. She had only come into the shop to pay her paper bill and was surprised to be asked to witness a will but went along up to the flat with Ted and Mr. Wilton. She recalls that Ted seemed to know what he was doing but his speech was a bit slurred and he spoke slowly and deliberately, as if he could have been drinking a bit. Not that he was, that she knew of, just that it seemed that way you understand. But yes, he made sense. But then she drops the bomb. On the way back down to the shop she says she commented on how Mr. Sullivan seemed a bit strange. Derek offered that it was no more strange than usual and added a little aside that he thought Ted was two dolly mixtures short of a quarter. (pound) YIKES!

Phyllis asks Audrey about the price of biscuits which has gone up. Deirdre is just on her way out and thanks Audrey for allowing her a half hour off. Phyllis's radar goes off and she nosily inquires where Deirdre is going. It's personal she's told. Oh the doctor then? But she is curtly told to mind her own business and Deirdre leaves. Phyllis then tries to pry it out of Audrey who doesn't know and wouldn't say if she did.

Where's she going? We are next in front of the building society where Tracy is waiting for Doug. Only her mother comes striding around the corner purposefully. What is she doing here, Tracy asks, self consciously. Deirdre demands to see Tracy's bankbook and notes the extra £2000 in it and reveals that she knows the whole story. She marches Tracy into the bank to make a withdrawal. The jig is up!

Vera is chatting with Audrey in the shop but stops quickly when Des arrives and tells him she doesn't want to talk to him. Des is trying to get Vera to accept the baby clothes and bits and pieces still at his house but Vera does not want anything from Des. Des makes the mistake of saying he just wants to help and Vera, sniffing the word "charity" behind what he says, when that's not what he meant, tells him she doesn't care what he does with the things but she won't have anything from him and she leaves.

Back at Rita's flat, she makes a restoring pot of tea, leaving Alf and Derek to hash over the events in court. Derek, being a witness couldn't be in the court but has been filled in on Mrs. Beverly's revelations. Derek doesn't really remember what he said that day but Alf pedantically reminds him several times about the dolly mixture remark and what kind of effect it will have on the case. Rita returns and Derek apologizes, it was just a joke and after all he didn't know about Ted's illness at the time. Rita understands fully. Anyway, now poor Derek feels like he's the one on trial!

Des comes in to an empty pub. (Must be just before afternoon closing) Jack moves to serve Des but Bet interrupts and takes over. Raquel comes through, having heard Des's voice and offers to buy him the drink and will have one with him as it's her night off. (I think someone else's radar is tuned as well!)

Doug arrives at Deirdre's and she makes Tracy hand over the money. In the form of a cheque or bank draft I expect. Doug is dismayed since that kind of defeats the whole exercise of dodging the taxman but Deirdre wont' have her daughter involved in anything illegal and gives him hell again for doing it. He tries to lure her out for a drink but she's not having it and orders him to stay away from her and her daughter. With a contemptuous look in Tracy's direction he states in no uncertain terms that he'll keep well away from her. (I wonder if Tracy will try to twist this around or if her crush is well and truly over!)

Des and Raquel converse in a booth. He is saying that he's going back to work but feels guilty about doing things like that or like shopping, normal things. That's understandable, Raquel soothes but he's got to get on with his life, that's all he can do. He knows what she's saying is right but it doesn't make it easy. He decides he'd best go home or he'll end up staying and drinking himself senseless. She offers to accompany him if he'd like.

Now this is the Raquel I like. Well not exactly like but respect more than the ditzy blonde with the spinectomy she often was written as. This Raquel was not the sharpest knife in the drawer but if she knew what she wanted, she didn't dither, she went for it, even manipulated for it if she had to. Just like when she married Curly on the rebound then lied in her job interview about not being married for that position in Kuala Lumpur.

Anyway, back to the bar. Mike is reminding Alma that he's taking Mark and Nicky ice skating tomorrow. Alma is incredulous at the mental image of Mike on skates. Oh I can picture it. I can see Mike as a bully on a hockey rink, can't you? Win at any cost? Alf and Audrey come in and Bet, Mike and Alma inquire about Rita's court case. Alf wryly tells them about Derek being the star witness for the Brooks family tomorrow now that he's been caught mouthing off about Ted. He'll now have to take the stand and explain what he meant by his careless remarks.

Raquel has gone back with Des and moves over to where he's standing, looking out the window. She gazes up at him, her eyes large and luminous, voice soft and seductive. Yep, she's thought of a way to make him feel better and offers it to him on a plate, saying she'll stay the night if that's what he wants. He's had just enough to drink to feel hungry for a little comfort and the show ends with them in a deep kiss.

Diane Johnston

Mrs. Beverly: MARGO STANLEY Sarah Brooks: ZULEMA DENE Philip Brooks: LESLIE SCHOFIELD Andrew Hopkinson: WILLIAM ARMSTRONG James Milburn: PATRICK BAILEY Judge Lancaster: RANDAL HERLEY Dr. Carter: EAMON RILEY (and a cast of thousands! LOL)
Written by PETER WHALLEY Directed by DAVID RICHARDS

Tuesday (3507, Wednesday 24 February 1993)

It's the morning after the night before for Des and Raquel. The latter pads downstairs in a bathrobe and affectionately snuggles Des, offering to make breakfast. Des accepts but is predictably un comfortable and there follows a terse conversation about what people will think. Des is ambivalent about the whole thing and finishes by telling Raquel that he doesn't "want people slagging you off - so be careful when you slip out, eh?"

Derek and Alf arrive at Rita's to accompany her to court. Alf is still bitching at Derek (well, I'm sorry, but that's what he's doing) about Derek's comment to Mrs. Beverly, recently revealed by her on the witness stand. Derek declares it's the opposition's mistake, "'cos they think I'm hostile to Ted. I can blow them out of the water there, can't I?" "For *pity's* sake, don't try to do anything clever!" Alf wisely begs.

Raquel reports to work at the Rovers where Bet, of course, knows she didn't come home the night before - she couldn't bolt the door - and has guessed where she did stay. "It's not like you might think..." begins Raquel lamely. She just couldn't leave Des in his state. He just needed somebody, anybody, to hold him. "Happened to be you," says Bet dryly. "Maybe I think more of him than anybody," Raquel defends herself. She asks Bet not to mention it to anyone. "Credit me with something," Bet says, adding that Raquel shouldn't pretend it was "all Des in his hour of need. You might've had summat in common with Mother Theresa last night, but not a lot!" Jack's arrival puts an end to the conversation.

Mike Baldwin arrives at MVB Motors and immediately inquires if Doug's got "this thing you keep 'avin' time off for" sorted out. Doug evades his questions, then explodes at Mike to leave him alone and storms off, shouting that he's going to pick up parts. Mike wonders aloud to Kevin what Deirdre sees in Doug. Kevin smirks that he thought it was Tracy seeing him - she's always hanging around as well. Mike says that the next thing Doug can say to him can be an apology.

Vera's in the Kabin with Tommeh on her hip buying cigarettes and nattering on and on about how Mavis musn't tell Jack, and Jack's not allowed to smoke around the baby, but then neither does Vera - around the baby, yadda yadda yadda. Mavis looks nauseated - she holds the bank note Vera has handed her over her nose the way royalty used to hold a perfumed handkerchief, or Cardinals an orange, against the nose to protect against the stench of the masses! Vera finally notices that Mavis hasn't given her change and Mavis admits she's totally distracted about the court case and in particular Derek testifying today. You know how lawyers twist everything around. Does she?! says Vera. "If it weren't for lawyers, RTurry wouldn't be where he is now! Blackening his good name!" she seethes. Mavis is by now so worked up she must ask Vera to watch the shop for her while she takes an emergency break - stress "always goes straight to mah stomach!" she says.

In the court, Derek's now infamous "a couple of dolly mixtures short of a quarter" comment about Ted is quoted back to him by the Brookes family lawyer, Mr. Hopkinson. Does Derek recall using that expression with regard to Mr. Sullivan? Derek can't say he does, particularly. Did he make *any* comment to Mrs. Beverly about Ted's state of mind? Derek unhappily admits he may have "jokingly" said something along those lines. So, presses Mr. Hopkinson, is "a couple of dolly mixtures short of a quarter" an expression he *might* have used? "It's possible," Derek admits quietly.

The Judge inquires as to the meaning of the expression. Mr. Hopkinson, smelling an opportunity, says "I'll ask Mr. Wilton to explain the meaning of it, My Lord." "Well, it's obvious what it means," says Derek uncomfortably. "Not sufficiently obvious to His Lordship," presses Hopkinson. Derek miserably admits that it means "not quite all there, as they say." "Not quite sound mentally?" presses Hopkinson. "I suppose so. But it wasn't a diagnosis! It was just a casual remark!" protests Derek. "A rather insulting remark," observes the lawyer. At the time, Derek says, Ted was married to Derek's boss, and it was "no secret we weren't... exactly pally." So it was just a casually insulting remark? asks Hopkinson. "Sort of. Yes," says Derek. "You might've easily have called him, I don't know, 'Old Fatso'," suggests the lawyer. "Well, I wouldn't, would I," says Derek, walking straight into Hopkinson's trap, "because he certainly wasn't fat."

Exactly. "But he *was* confused in his mind, as you quite casually pointed out to Mrs. Beverly, when she had noticed the same thing, on the occasion of the signing of the will," declares Hopkinson triumphantly.

Rita's lawyer, Mr. Milburn, tries his best to salvage this devastating testimony. What Derek said to Mrs. Beverly sprang from a personal dislike of Ted? he inquires. Yes, at the time... but he didn't know Ted was ill then, Derek says. Mr. Milburn asks if Derek knew *at the time* that the question of sanity was very important to wills? Oh yes, says Derek. And he didn't have any qualms or doubts about witnessing Ted's will at the time? "No, none," confirms Derek firmly.

Mr. Hopkinson re-cross examines Derek. He asks how Derek came to be a witness at all, and Derek says it was simply because he was there and he was asked. "Well, you do, don't you?" he says, not helping Rita's cause. "Somebody says 'sign this' and you do." Mr. Hopkinson then drives home the point that Ted was Derek's boss' husband and it would've been almost impossible for Derek to refuse his request to witness the will, much less to say to Ted's face was that the reason was he was "two dolly mixtures short of a load"! But that *was* Derek's real opinion of Ted at the time, wasn't it? insists Hopkinson. Derek is silent, looking like a deer in the headlights of a truck. Mr. Hopkinson says that he can see this embarrasses Derek and he doesn't want to embarrass him any more. Alf looks frustrated. Rita looks as if she could eat Derek alive. Philip Brooks, Ted's brother-in-law, smiles smugly.

After a break, we rejoin the courtroom drama with Rita now on the stand. Mr. Milburn has just finished questioning his client and Mr. Hopkinson takes over. He says he doesn't wish to distress Rita, but she has just said that there was no time when Ted was incapacitated. Isn't it true she did up his buttons for him? Yes, but that's not what she meant by incapacitated, replies Rita calmly. The lawyer introduces a letter from 1986 and notes that Ted's signature on it is quite different than the signature on the will. He then says that Ted's speech at the signing was described as being slurred, like the speech of a drunken man. His signature on the will looks a bit like that of a drunken man, too, wouldn't Rita agree? "I don't have a lot of correspondence with drunken men," Rita says with great dignity. She is becoming angry.

Isn't it true, the lawyer goes on, that Ted sometimes called Rita by his first wife's name? Sometimes, admits Rita stonily. He's not trying to be indelicate, says Mr. Hopkinson, but was this at moments of "particular excitement", or ordinary times? This *very* indelicate, if oblique, reference to her and Ted's sexual life enrages Rita and she appears barely able to contain herself. From time to time, at ordinary times, she agrees. "So, here we have a man who couldn't do up his own buttons, whose writing and speaking could lead you to believe that he was drunk, and who, at ordinary times, was sometimes confused about his wife's identity. Would that be a fair picture?" "No," says Rita icily. "I'd say it was more like one of them games where you join dots up to make a face. You don't get a true impression."

Back in the garage, Doug apologizes to Mike for his earlier outburst. Mike asks what all this is about him and "young Tracy". Doug admits he turned to Tracy to get his cheque cashed. Mike reminds Doug he offered to do it. "Yeah, and you said it'd cost me and all," says Doug. "How much did it cost you already?" Mike points out. All right, Doug agrees - can Mike do it by tonight? First, Mike's got something more important on - ice skating! Doug doesn't want to hear Mike's personal plans. Can he get the cheque cashed so it's nowt to do with Doug? "I know a man," grins Mike as he accepts Doug's cheque. Shortly Mike's calling Gail at the cafe to see if she or Martin can pick up Nicky and Mark after school; Mike will meet them at the Cafe for skating. "Something's come up," he says, eyeing Doug's cheque. Gail says they'll manage.

Back in court, Judge Lancaster notes that the case is simple on the face of it. [Oh yeah? Perhaps he should try writing an update about it then!] What's complicated is the progressive nature and varied symptoms of Ted's illness. The question is, were the symptoms sufficiently manifest and sufficiently severe at the time he signed the will?

With that little suspense-building scene, we're back to the shop, where Deirdre asks Ken if he'll have a word with Tracy - "she listens to you". About what, asks Ken. "Where do I begin?" groans Dreary.

Judge Lancaster is saying that on the balance of probabilities he must find for the plaintiff and order Ted's will set aside. "Yes!" gloats Philip Brookes *very* loudly - everyone, including his wife and son, look shocked at his outburst. The Judge then points out that with the will invalidated, the entirety of the estate goes to the widow - so the only result is that Ted's other survivors lose their legacies. "It is hard to see what has been gained from this case," the Judge says rather sadly. He orders court costs to be paid from the estate - so the only other outcome of the case is that lots of money has been eaten up in legal fees.

Outside the courtroom, Rita and Alf discuss the outcome with Mr. Milburn. Rita reflects on the Judge's calling it a "pyrrhic victory" - "You mean they won, but they won nothing," she muses. (Although I've heard the expression before and it's pretty clear in context, Judge Lancaster's use of it did send me to my dictionary with curiosity as to the origin. Turns out that it comes from Pyrrhus, king of Epirus who sustained heavy losses in defeating the Romans, and a Phyrrhic victory is one "achieved at excessive cost" or "costly to the point of negating or outweighing expected benefits". So there you go. Corrie is ever food for the mind, what?) Alf is still furious that the estate must pay all the court costs (annoying Milburn with some snide comments about "you lot" getting their share) and grumbles about some Derek "not holding the end up". "He stood in that box like a piece of limp lettuce!" he rages. "When you find yourself facing my learned friend Mr. Hopkinson from the witness box, do let me know," says Mr. Milburn coldly. "I'd like to be in court." To Rita, he says kindly, "I'm sorry we didn't do better." After Milburn departs, Alf and Rita encounter the Brookes family in the hallway. Alf confronts them, saying he hopes they're pleased with themselves. "We've been justified and the world knows it," replies Philip. "You've wasted money, that's all!" rages Alf. "And every penny is a penny *she'll* never get!" hisses Philip. Ted's sister says disgustedly that she's going, and as Philip follows her out of the building, he turns and shouts, "We've been JUSTIFIED!"

Ken is having that word with Tracy at Deirdre's. She says it's her building society account so she can do what she likes with it. Ken agrees but he's puzzled firstly as to why she said she'd cash the cheque for Doug, and secondly as to why she was so childishly making Doug run all over town for his money. "Serves him right," she pouts. Ken thinks it probably does. Was she trying to make Doug "piggy in the middle" between her and Deirdre? he asks. "Nothing to do with you," Tracy says petulantly. "Nothing's got anything to do with you. You're not me dad!" Ken wisely doesn't react to this barb. "Okay," he says gently. "Tell me when you think you need one." Tracy bursts into tears and throws herself into Ken's arms. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry I said it!" she sobs. Ken tells her that secrets are like diseases; they're always unhealthy. There's so many things it's difficult to talk about, they don't need to shop around for more. He kisses her tenderly on the forehead.

In the Rovers, Raquel asks Bet's permission to pop over and see Des if it gets slow later and if he doesn't come in. Bet agrees, and reminds Raquel that she will be bolting the Rovers door tonight if Raquel doesn't come back. It's clear that Raquel hopes this will be the case.

Rita and Alf come in and Bet ushers them to a seat where drinks will be brought over. Mavis joins them. "Is Derek coming?" Alf demands aggressively. Mavis mews that he's decided to stay in. Bet's prepared champagne. Rita says it's a waste - they lost! Purely a technicality, Alf points out, and Bet adds that Rita's had all this hanging over her head and now it's over - that's worth celebrating. "Bet, you're a pal. You all are," Rita says gratefully. She urges Mavis to go and get Derek and tell him to join them.

Back at Deirdre's, Ken's come into the kitchen for tea and to debrief with Dreary. Did she know Tracy had a crush on Doug? he asks. Not a clue, she says. Teaching teenaged girls, you recognize the signs, Ken says. "I really have been totally" - wait for it - "schtewpid, haven't I?" Dreary moans. Not totally, says Ken - at least she's sent Doug packing. He gets some background information on why Doug needed someone to cash the cheque - it seems he was hiding the money from his bankruptcy receiver. You can go to jail for breaching a bankruptcy order, Ken says, to Deirdre's alarm. "I'm going to put that man straight!" Ken declares.

In the Rovers, He Who Shall Be Set Straight waits glumly for Baldwin to show up with his cash. Mike runs in, extremely pleased with himself after his successful ice-skating expedition. ("2 hours and not one broken bone," he says to Bet and Raquel, saying it was due to the fact that he clung to the rail!) He sits down and an anxious Doug joins him. Mike gives him an envelope stuffed with cash which Doug immediately yanks out in handfuls and starts counting. "Yeah, go on. Be discreet," Mike says sarcastically. Doug realizes the cash is £500 short. "Got to cover my overhead," says Mike. "25%?" Doug says unbelievingly. "Listen, when I put two grand in the bank, taxman takes 40% and asks a lot more questions," says Mike shortly. (Hard to argue with that!) Of course, if Doug doesn't want it... Mike teases cockily, reaching for the cash. Doug snatches the money to him but his angry glare as Mike goes on about taking Mark to a hockey game next shows him to be neither amused nor satisfied.

Raquel is on Des' doorstep. She's been wanting to come over all night, she says, to see how he is. "Fine, honest," Des says. He is obviously not receptive to her visit. Has he been all on his own all evening? she wonders. He prefers it that way, he says briefly. Is there anything he needs, she tries. No.

Meanwhile, Alf has dropped Rita off across the street, urging her to get a good night's sleep and not brood over the events of the day. He spies Raquel and Des conversing on the latter's doorstep and his curiosity is piqued. This only reinforces Des' discomfort. "I don't think it's a good idea," he is saying. "We'll have the whole street talking." He's really glad she came over and stayed the night, "but I don't think we should be..." there's a long pause. "Well, thanks for callin', any road." Raquel looks utterly heartbroken. "Night," Des says finally and closes the door. Raquel slowly walks back across the damp, dark street to the Rovers Return.

ronniecat

Judge Lancaster: RANDAL HERLEY James Milburn: PATRICK BAILEY Andrew Hopkinson: WILLIAM ARMSTRONG Sarah Brookes: ZULEMA DENE Philip Brookes: LESLIE SCHOFIELD Roger Brookes: NIGEL CARRINGTON
Written by JULIAN ROCHE Directed by DAVID RICHARDS

Wednesday (3508, Friday 26 February 1993)

Funny how these episodes, where not much happens, take forever to write!

The episode opens at Rita's flat. She's obviously just out of bed, since she's wearing her housecoat and slippers. She relaxes on the couch to enjoy an early morning read of the papers, but is taken aback when she spots her own picture on page 3, along with the headline "Dying Man's Will Overturned."

Curly asks Angie if she'll be home that night -- he's planning to cook something special and was also thinking of inviting Des. Angie agrees that that would be nice as the pair approach Des' door. While Des invites them in, Angie brings in the several bottles of milk left on the stoop, and Des comments that there are even more in the fridge; he keeps forgetting to change the order. Curly kindly offers to take care of the situation from work, since he has the milk delivery number there. Unfortunately, Des has already accepted a dinner invitation for that evening from his boss, but he makes a point of thanking Curly and Angie for all their support over the past few days. Angie insists it was nothing ("what are mates for?") before rushing off to work. Des observes that Angie is a great gal, and Curly agrees, adding that she's "the best." He's really starting to feel that he might have a chance with her, and from what he can tell, Neil seems to have just "melted away" from Angie's life.

While Vera fusses over Tommy, Jack ushers Audrey in, bearing a grocery box of baby needs. Vera asks if she doesn't think that Tommy resembles Terry, but Audrey thinks he's more like Lisa, especially around the eyes. Audrey breaks the frosty silence that follows by explaining that she and Alf put the box of things together for Tommy; just a few "bits and bobs" for the baby in the form of nappies, formula, baby food, etc. Vera's pride kicks in momentarily, and she insists on paying for the stuff, but Jack reminds her that the things are a gift for Tommy, and advises Vera "not to be awkward." Audrey comments that it must be difficult raising a baby at Vera's age, and Vera snaps back that "unlike some," she's never been afraid of hard work.

At the Rover's Return, Raquel is obviously miles away while preparing for another day's business. Bet correctly assumes that she's thinking about Des, and assures her that he didn't mean to hurt her. Des is really suffering over Lisa's death, and Raquel took his mind off his problems for a few hours. Now he's feeling guilty for betraying Lisa. Raquel wonders if she ought to tell him that she'll happily settle for his friendship, but Bet advises her to leave things as they are. After all, Des knows where to find her when he wants to talk.

Ken shows up at Mike's garage, wanting "a word" with Doug. Straight to the point, he tells Doug to "stay away" from Tracy. Doug's back goes up instantly, and he tells Ken to "take a running jump," but his attitude changes when Ken informs him that if he hears that Doug has been near his daughter, he'll blow the whistle on him and tell the bankruptcy auditors about the cheque. Doug tries to defend himself by reminding Ken that no one forced Tracy to put his cheque through her account, but Ken isn't interested. Instead, he reiterates that he will tell the authorities about Doug's scam. Doug looks like a frightened rabbit, and instantly agrees that there won't be any further contact.

Mike approaches the minute Ken leaves, and having overheard the conversation, remarks that Ken has Doug "over a barrel." Doug lets on that he isn't worried, prompting Mike to observe that he's disappointed to hear that, since if Ken did turn Doug in, he's not the only person who would be in trouble. Mike would be implicated, as would his contact who cashed the cheque. He warns "Douglas" that Ken would happily see him thrown in jail, Mike would be up to his neck in it, and his contact would probably break Doug's legs. So he suggests that Doug make a point of crossing the road anytime he sees Tracy approaching.

At the Kabin, Rita suggests that Mavis take an early lunch, but Mavis declines and thinks instead that Rita ought to go back to her flat and rest. Rita is in the middle of explaining why she'd rather stay busy when Roger Brookes comes into the shop. He tries to apologize for what went on in court, claiming that he didn't agree with his father's plan to contest the Will. Now he thinks it should all be put behind them, and that Rita should "forgive and forget." Rita flatly tells him to "get out," and when he doesn't move, she confronts him with the fact that he sat "shoulder to shoulder" with his dad while she was portrayed as a "scheming, cold-hearted bitch," and Ted as a "pathetic old wreck." She's not bothered by what people think of her, but Ted can't do anything about the nasty things said about him -- so Rita will "never forget, let alone forgive." Having been put firmly in his place, Roger slinks off without another word.

Over at the Corner Shop, Ken tells Deirdre that he spoke to Doug. Deirdre wonders if it will do any good and if Tracy will stay away from Doug, since Tracy seems not to listen to anything she says these days. Ken smugly reminds Deirdre that if she would cast her mind back, "I told you this would happen." Before they separated and divorced, he warned Deirdre that she would have a hard time bringing up a teenager on her own. "So it's all my fault?" Deirdre shoots back. Exasperated by Ken's holier-than-thou attitude, Deirdre indicates that this conversation is over, but Ken has to get in another dig before leaving. He tells her that she has a tendency to choose "unreliable" boyfriends, citing Doug, Phil Jennings, and... "Mike Baldwin" supplies Deirdre. "You just couldn't resist that, could you?" she asks in disgust. "What did you ever resist?" is Ken's parting shot.

At the pub, Curly asks Raquel if Angie has said anything to her about him, but Raquel is distracted by other things and isn't sure what Curly is talking about. Curly puts his case before her again -- Angie hasn't moved out, Neil seems not to be around these days, and things are going well between them. All Raquel can say is that they "seem suited," but then again, sometimes people don't see it (obviously referring to herself and Des).

Bet, meanwhile, asks Mavis if Rita is planning to come in for a drink. Mavis tells her that Rita has gone home, and that everything seemed to be going well that day until Roger showed up. She realizes they've been doing business with the same company for many years now, but as far as Mavis is concerned, Rita doesn't have to continue buying the same sweets if Roger is going to be their sales rep.

Jack arrives home for his tea, and when he learns that Tommy is sleeping, he wonders if Vera ought not to awaken him and try to keep him awake more during the day -- perhaps then he will sleep through the night. Vera doesn't even give the suggestion a thought, but does tell Jack that Tommy is growing so quickly that he needs more clothes. Jack reminds her that they simply can't afford all these things for the baby -- they haven't even paid Lisa's funeral expenses yet -- but Vera believes that there will be some sort of settlement from the driver who knocked Lisa down. Jack agrees, but wonders if the money won't go directly to Terry (uh oh!), since he's Lisa's next of kin. "He'll see us right" is Vera's response (DON'T count on it!).

Curly is at the Corner Shop, buying groceries for tonight's meal. At the counter he explains to Audrey that he's found himself in trouble before over buying red wine to accompany a meal, so he settles instead on a dozen small bottles of cider. Deirdre arrives back from the beauty parlour with a new hairdo -- her hair is shorter, even more tightly curled (if that's possible), and appears to be a bit darker in colour -- although it could just be the lighting. Anyway, Audrey goes on about how wonderful it looks, and Deirdre remarks that she was just in the mood for something different.

In Rita's flat, she tells Bet that her life was taken apart in court. She sat there in disbelief while solicitors told the judge how she lived, what she did, how she felt. All Rita wanted to do was stand up and tell them that none of it was true, that her life with Ted wasn't like that. "They made me feel dirty" Rita reflects sadly; "they made me wish to God that I'd never set eyes on Ted Sullivan." "He was a lovely man," Bet reminds her. Rita knows that. For only a few moments she believed that she was sorry for meeting and marrying Ted, and then she hated herself for feeling that way. Since then, she's had time to think, and "even with all of this, Ted was worth it... I loved him, he loved me, and he was happy."

Tracy arrives home, and noticing the change in her mom's appearance, is quick to say that she doesn't like it. Deirdre's response is that Tracy doesn't seem to like anything these days, and tells her that she's self-centred. "You have nothing to complain about," she reminds Tracy, and she invites her to "look around" at all the lonely and fed-up people of the world. When Tracy gives her that "I know there are lots of starving children" line, Deirdre tells her in disgust that she's going for a drink -- "so if you want something to eat, make it yourself!"

Back at the Rover's Return, Mike asks Steve if the t-shirt order is ready, and Steve replies that it'll be done by noon tomorrow. "It had better be," is Mike's retort, prompting Doug to remark that one of these days, he'll get a handful of something really mucky and shove it in Mike's gob. Steve responds that he's got his own little side-line of t-shirts for a pop group in Birmingham that Mike isn't aware of, and Doug congratulates him for pulling something like this off behind Mike's back. "Hey up," Steve cracks when Deirdre walks in, but Doug only replies that he thinks he'd better let her buy her own drinks.

At the bar, Curly tells Raquel about the fancy meal he has planned for Angie, prompting Raquel to remark that it sounds like Curly has something else on his mind. Curly protests that his intentions toward Angie are "strictly honourable."

A change of venue, and for the first time today, we see Gail and Martin at the Cafe, which is just about to close for the day. Nicky tells them that Mike is buying Mark a brand new pair of skates, hinting that he'd like a pair himself. Gail says they'll discuss it at home, and as they leave, Angie comes in and asks to speak to Alma.

Rita has obviously perked-up and decided to go to the pub for a drink after all. She also buys a round for Bet, Mavis and Derek, remarking that she might as well start to enjoy the money she's inherited. With Mavis' prompting, Derek manages to apologize to Rita for his role in the court case; in his words, things didn't come out the way he intended.

Alma and Angie arrive together and order drinks. Curly tells Angie that dinner will be ready soon, and to Curly's utter amazement, she insists on buying a bottle of red wine(!) to have with it. When she tells Curly that she's going to miss his cooking, Curly doesn't understand. His face falls when she informs him that she's going to move into the vacant flat above the Cafe!

Heather Morlan

Roger Brookes: NIGEL CARRINGTON
Written by JOHN STEVENSON Directed by DAVID RICHARDS

Thursday (3509, Monday 1 March 1993)

Angie is getting ready to move into the cafe flat and brings Neil in to have a look. Gail and Audrey speculate as to whether he's moving in too. Seems not, for the moment, but he's going to help her move, using his van. Correct me if i'm wrong but the flat is furnished, we saw that, so how much stuff would she have that needs a van to deliver it around the corner?

Vera and Jack have had a fitful night nursing a teething baby. They get a visit first thing from a social worker. Routine mostly but she mentions compensation which pleases Jack who calms Vera from her stubborn prideful defense that they aren't too old to mind the baby on their own. Ms. Nable also suggests a child care drop in center that they might take advantage of. Jack has to go to work so Vera continues the interview on her own. She doesn't seem all puffed up with pride now, in fact she seems more embarrassed and when the woman asks for Jack's salary she self consciously insists they can afford to raise the baby without help of the Social and ushers the woman out, taking her card with only a passing glance at it. When she goes into the pub later to tell Jack, who isn't pleased that she turned down the ready money, she mentions what is probably one of the other reasons she walked away from the money, the fact that she was worried that the Horton's might use it against them to get custody of Tommy.

Gail and Martin huff and puff over the gas bill and worry where the money's going to come from to pay it. They're pride isn't helped when Nicky moans about their old car and they realize he's getting a little too used to gadding about with Mark in Mike's Jaguar. He is made to walk to school as punishment.

Mike is gone to London so Audrey asks Alma to spend the night with her, enjoying a video and a takeaway but just then Mike reappears. His contact cancelled the meeting so he turned around and came back. He doesn't mind if Alma keeps her plans and thinks perhaps he'll see if Mark wants to go to a movie. Since Nicky is sitting in the cafe at that time he is invited along but Gail dashes the lad's joy with a curt no. He's spend all his pocket money and they can't afford to give him any. Gail summarily turns down Mike's offer to pay and nearly bites Audrey's head off when she offers to treat her grandson which makes Gail look like the bad guy for trying to teach her child that he can't have everything he wants. Later, Denise walks into the corner shop just as Gail and Audrey are going at it hammer and tongs about the incident, ending with Gail storming out angrily and Audrey snapping at Denise.

Later, Audrey goes to Gail's house so Martin takes the kids out of the way so they can have privacy. Gail and Audrey each apologize and are on the edge of making it up until Audrey makes the mistake of offering Gail money to pay a bill or help out. Gail's pride rears it's head and she insists she will pay her own bills, struggle though she will. Audrey tries to get her daughter to let her help but it's no use. Gail critically shoots down her mother for calling her principles "silly", saying she is determined to raise her children properly and hurtfully and bitterly recalls her own childhood, going to bed in the dark because the electricity was turned off or spending evenings on her own with only a bag of crisps to eat while Audrey was out and about. Audrey's face flushes with shame as she listens wordlessly, not able to find any way to defend the truth and then leaves silently when Gail finishes her tirade. (EXCELLENT SCENE between these two!!)

Steve, taking advantage of Mike's absence, begins to load concert tshirts into the van when Mike returns. Kevin manages to delay Mike's entry into the shop until Steve hides the evidence. He makes out that he's sweating because of the stomach flu (yes, well that's one way to describe the results of his fright! LOL!) Mike finds out that the (legitimate) order is done so lets Steve have the afternoon off. Steve puts his mother in the picture about the lie so she won't blow his cover if Baldwin comes in the bar. She objects but he leaves before she can get much of it out. Steve has also pretended to be "Uncle Steven" when he called Victoria's school, hoping to persuade her to get leave from the campus to go with him to sell the tshirts at the concert. She nervously lies to the Head that her grandfather is ill and covers her mistake mentioning she's going to Weatherfield by saying that's where he's being looked after by Bet who managed to stay friends after their breakup.

They have a great time selling shirts outside the concert but later in the van Steve realizes that the battery is dead because he "accidentally" left the lights on. He suggests a hotel because they won't be able to get a jump start now even though they are parked outside the venue where the concert is audibly still going on. Why not wait for the concert to end? There will sure to be plenty of people with cars going home after! But neither one suggests that and they do end up in a hotel, Vicky having called the school to say her grandfather is worse and she's staying over. Steve noses around the room. Vicky wasn't fooled though and makes Steve admit that he left the van lights on, on purpose. He in turn makes her admit that she knew he did and went along with it anyway and they grin and proceed to roll around on the bed kissing (i wonder if he's going to take his cap off?)

Diane Johnston

Patricia Nable: TRICIA WILCOCK Dr. Carr: VIRGINIA DENHAM
Written by PAUL ABBOT Directed by BRIAN MILLS, CHARLES LAUDER, HOWARD BAKER (really!)

Friday (3510, Wednesday 3 March 1993)

After spending the night worrying over what Steve's been up to, Liz and Jim are relieved to finally get a call from him in the morning. They don't buy the story of the car breaking down though and Jim says he seriously hopes the boy is "looking after that wee girl". (Uh - define "looking after", Jim?)

Meanwhile, Vicky has ordered a continental breakfast in their room while Steve's been out making the call home. She asks if the car is seen to (which of course it is) and he says they can soon be on their way. As they lightheartedly sit down to their breakfast, both confess to having no regrets over spending the night together.

This is moving day for Angie. As she packs up her many accessories, Curly comments on how austere the place will appear once she's gone. She remarks lightly that they're only things, he can always replace them easily enough. But Curly says he thinks "simple" will suit his new "monastic" existence better. Neil arrives to remove the stuff to Angie's new place and when he takes the first load out, Curly tells her he'll miss her. Again, she tries to lighten the atmosphere, reminding him she won't be far away. Curly makes a crack about "the Incredible Hulk" hanging about and she sharply tells him to watch it or she won't be seeing much of her after all!

Ivy stops in at the Duckworths to call for Vera on her way to work, only to find that Vera has no intention of leaving little Tommy. Ivy wonders how they'll manage without Vera's job but she reckons she'd do the same if Gail's kids were left without a mother. Jack is quick to chime in that they barely managed *with* Vera's income but Vera cuts him off sharply, "Shurrup you!! We've plenty of love to give him!" Jack nods disconsolately, "Aye - no decent food, no toys, but plenty of love..."

At the Rovers, Betty takes a phone message for Bet that leaves her scratching her head in wonder. She returns to the bar and Liz' curiosity is aroused when as Bet enters, Betty relays that Vicky's school has just called. Following Betty and Bet into the back, Liz seems to be the only one in the picture as we hear about Vicky's absence from school "to look after Alec", who has supposedly been taken poorly while here in Weatherfield. Mystified, Bet picks up the phone to sort it out with the school, but Liz steps forward and depresses the receiver. Nervously, she admits to Bet that Vicky isn't with Alec - she's with Steve. Bracing herself for the details, Bet says coolly, "Let's hear it, Liz - I'm all ears".

Later, as "Uncle Steve" drops Vicky back at her boarding school, they share an embrace, a kiss and mutual congratulations over pulling off such a "clever" scheme. Triumphantly, Vicky waves him off and heads back into school. She is intercepted in the hallway by her headmistress, Dr. Carr, who notifies Vicky that "a surprise" awaits her in her office.

As she enters the headmistress' office, Vicky's chin almost hits the floor. There stands Bet, smiling broadly and holding out the make-up case that Vicky "accidentally left behind this morning", when she "rushed off" to come back to school... Dr. Carr excuses herself saying she must get back to her play rehearsal, which prompts Bet to comment, "Vicky, I'm surprised you're not taking part in the production - you've shown remarkable promise for theatrics, lately!" The irony is not lost on Vicky but Dr. Carr offers that the play is an effort of the junior class, that Vicky is too old for this one.

Alone in the big office, Bet confronts her, "Not too old for school-girl pranks though, eh Vicky?" Flushing with embarrassment, Vicky apologizes for her deceit and tries to appeal to Bet's understanding. Getting kicked out of school isn't the only risk she's run, Bet informs her. Softening, she reminds her of her own experience, being a teenaged mother. Vicky assures her that she "knows what she is doing" - besides which, she and Steve "love each other". Bet cautions her that she *hopes* Steve would be there for her, but "they" tend to show their true colours if there's a baby in the picture. With a somber warning against pulling another stunt like this, Bet tells Vicky that she won't give her away this time, but she ought to be careful. Giving assurances that she'll play by the rules, Vicky hugs her with gratitude and affection.

Back at the Rovers, Alf hastily finishes his pint and makes excuses to get back to the shop when fellow councillor Harry joins him at the bar. To Alf's embarrassment, Potts follows him back to the shop and occupies most of the next hour trying to persuade the grocer to take on the Social Services Committee, left vacant by the recent passing of another councillor. Alf makes his excuses but the thick-skinned Potts is not easily discouraged. When Audreh comes back to the shop, her cool demeanour towards him finally achieves what Alf's excuses didn't and he defers the proposal for another time.

Steve arrives back from his overnight excursion and drops into the pub for a brew. Mike joins him at the bar and mentions his apparent improved health. As Steve cockily bluffs his way through a ruse about his sudden recovery, Liz looks on with concern. With Mike out of earshot, he tells her he's got it covered, no need to worry. Mindful of Bet's anticipated response, Liz answers flatly, "I wouldn't count on it".

Don notices Jack fiddling with the tape on his specs and asks when he's going to get around to a new pair. Jack doesn't think it's in the cards now that they have only his income to live on. Don mentions the Child Benefit but as Jack explains, that's barely enough to buy nappies with!

At the T-shirt factory, Steve would like nothing better than to get on with his work but Jim keeps him busy with a dressing-down over taking off with Vicky. "She's only 16!" yells Jim. Rolling his eyes, Steve reminds his father that he used to say she was "only 15". Beside the point, Jim warns - Steve had no business leading her astray. He also reminds Steve that if Baldwin gets wind of Steve's illicit time off, he's bound to lose his job - an eventuality he and Liz would not welcome at the moment with finances as they are. Bet walks in and Jim relinquishes Steve to her steely address, inviting her to "string him up until he screams" as she will. Bet has few words for Steve. She tells him she was "foolish" when she defended him against Alec. Then she lays it on the line... She may not be able to stop him seeing Vicky, but if he "takes a step out of line", he'll "live to regret it". Steve swallows hard as she turns before leaving - "Does Mike Baldwin know where you were last night?" Sheepishly, he admits that his boss is in the dark. "Well then", she warns, "don't be surprised if a little birdie tells him!"

At home for tea, Jack is disappointed to see Vera dishing out spuds again, heaps of them and nothing but. He complains but she reminds him that the carbohydrates will afford them energy! Don happens by and Jack invites him to stay, if he "fancies spuds" (LOL) but Don explains that he only dropped in for a minute. He's been thinking about their circumstances and now offers them the loan of some money, saying they need it far more than he does. Jack feels his luck turning at last and is glad to accept but Vera sharply tells Don to mind his own business, that they don't need his "charity"! Insulted, Don leaves the house in a huff, promising not to make the same mistake again. In his wake, Vera shouts at Jack for being so willing to sacrifice his integrity. "We can't afford integrity!" he retorts. "Then get them taters down yer and get back to work and earn yer living!" she shouts back.

In a classic demonstration of the timeless technique known to kids as "Look ma - I'm deprived", Nicky stops into the cafe and begins a purposeful sulk. When Gail takes notice and joins him at his table, he tells her how tight his shoes are. She points out that they're practically new but undaunted, Nicky continues his campaign by saying his trainers are also "naff". Finally, his mother clues in when he mentions *Mark's* new pair. As she throws up her hands in despair, Alma comes to the rescue. Firmly, she reminds Nicky that Mark is an only child. "He probably wishes he had what you have - brothers and sisters", she says gently. "I'd rather have new trainers!" sulks Nicky as he leaves in defeat.

Upstairs in the flat, Angie and Neil have just about got her things arranged. She is evidently thrilled to have her own space but makes no bones about letting Neil know that he's welcome to share it with her.

In the pub, Steve watches uneasily as Bet and Mike have a tête à tête at the bar. As they wrap it up, Steve tenses at Mike's approach. Much to his relief, she hasn't grassed him and Mike only wants to notify him of a new order coming in tomorrow. Stressing the importance of this job, Mike tells him he doesn't care if he comes down with "beri beri" - he'd better be there. When Mike leaves the Rovers, Steve goes over to thank Bet for her discretion, mentioning that he was "worried for a minute". Fixing him with her coldest stare, she answers, "You will be next time, Sunshine".

At the end of the day, Ivy drops in again on Vera. She brushes off her friend's apology for Don, denying it as her reason for coming - it's between Vera and Don. But, she's been reconsidering what she said this morning - she doesn't think it's realistic for Vera to take on the responsibility of a baby at her age. "We'll manage!" Vera assures her optimistically. But Ivy doesn't just mean the money - "Vera, look at you, luv - you're shattered!" Impatient with what she perceives as the lack of support for her commitment, Vera strengthens her resolve once more. Her voice rising, she she informs Ivy that she promised "R Turry" she'd look after his son and that's what she intends to do! "Besides", she adds for good measure, "it's MY business - and nobody else's!"

Anita Bélanger

Dr. Carr: VIRGINIA DENHAM
Written by MARTIN ALLEN Directed by HOWARD BAKER, CHARLES LAUDER and BRIAN MILLS


Originally transmitted: 5, 8, 10, 12 & 15 March 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 27 - Friday 31 March 2000
Episode Numbers: 3511 - 3515

Monday (3511, Friday 5 March 1993)

In the early morning hours Mavis, on her way to work, hears a baby cry. From behind the stone cladding Vera hollers to Jack to get up as it's his turn. He of course just as loudly objects. Mavis gets to the Kabin door to find the shop light on. She gingerly opens the unlocked door to find Rita industriously marking the papers, back at her post. Rita greets Mavis who is delighted to see her friend back to work. Rita seems to be glad too thought the early morning chill was a bit of a shock. Mavis takes up her rightful place at Rita's right hand side and makes the tea with a satisfied smile that says all is right with her world again.

Vera's finally got the baby to sleep and Jack, still half asleep at the table, crankily bitches about no sleep and how come all his turns are at night and more about them being too old for all this. They argue, voices are raised and the baby starts crying again.

The Platts begin their day much like most families do, urging reluctant children to get a move on, washing hands, brushing teeth and making breakfast. Gail is doing most of the rushing around, glaring at Martin impatiently as he is just sitting on the couch. He does actually contribute something, he picks up the post (pace yourself, lad!) Ohhh, what's this? A tax rebate for about 450 quid!! Gail squeals excitedly and climbs over Martin giggling. Later in the cafÈ she tries to get hold of Ivy to babysit so they can go out. It'll be a nice change to be able to go somewhere with money in their pockets she tells Alma as Angie appears, having spent her first night in her new flat. She's had a bit of a restless night actually as, she jokes, she's not used to having nobody snoring on the other side of the wall but makes a few noises about having someone of her own to cuddle up to if she had her way. Alma, with a grin, suggests she just move Curly in which sobers Angie. Not exactly what she had in mind then?

Speaking of Neil, and we were, more or less, he pops his head into the Salon and asks Denise if he can have a word with her tonight, something about tying up loose ends. He offers to bring a bottle but she tells him in a straight forward manner not to bother, just come and they'll talk. But she's working so it will have to be a bit later. Fiona notes that Denise is in a good mood which is confirmed and Denise speculates that her mood could be even better tomorrow if he's after what she suspects he is.

Audrey is nursing a bruise caused apparently by a faulty drawer in a dressing table. I guess it must not shut properly is the only thing I can figure out. She is of course using it as an excuse to buy new instead of having the old repaired as Alf has suggested. He figures, rightly so, no doubt, that she'll want all the matching bits to go with it (new bedroom suite). And why not? But Audrey points out, they don't need a new bed, as the dressing table gets more action that it does. (do they make dressing tables with go faster stripes on them? I'll bet Audrey is a Formula 1 pro at makeup and hair!) Mavis drops in for teabags and cheerfully tells Audrey & Alf about Rita's return to the fold. Alf is pleased that Rita is getting herself back to normal but all Audrey can do is accuse Alf of being the kind of person of whom everyone takes advantage, naming Rita and Harry Potts as being the most recent. Now, Alf scolds, Rita is her friend too and he has already denied whatever request that was that Harry made the other day. (I forget what it was or if we even knew the details).

Over in the pub, Jack is walking around in a daze, absolutely shattered from lack of sleep and no use nor ornament to anyone. Don tells Betty he offered to take Jack out for an evening but Jack turned him down. Betty says it's more a matter that he "can't" than he "doesn't want to", implying Vera's foot firmly in place. Aye. Harry Potts has pursued Alf into the pub, Audrey having told him that Alf was at dinner.

Bet drops in on Vera to find out if there's anything they can do to arrange the baby minding schedule so Jack's working days aren't so fractured. Vera is struggling to get a disposable nappy to stick on right and is failing miserably. She defends her decision to mind the baby to Bet, completely ignoring anything Bet is saying and commandeering her to help hold Tommy's legs while she tries again. Up comes the baby, but his little bum is bare, nappy having dropped off. (and isn't it a cute little bum but then babies do have them. They must do because nearly every parent has a bare butt on a rug or in a bathtub photo of their darlings in the album to be trotted out to embarrass the kid when they are teenagers bringing their girlfriends or boyfriends home! Poor Tommy, this actor gets his butt shot in video!) Vera decides she needs sellotape and shoves the baby into Bet's arms while she scampers to the Kabin. Bet is left holding a baby who is naked from the waist down, his little bits all hanging out. Wait for it . . . aww, I was hoping Bet would get a little liquid pressie ! LOL!

Curly stops into the Kabin to put a card in the window advertising for a new lodger. He tells Rita and Mavis that he was unhappy when Angie left but realizes he has to get on with his life although has decided there will be no women in his future. Mavis feels sorry for Curly but Rita correctly points out that there weren't that many women in Curly's past!

The Salon is now closed but before Neil arrives, Denise has taken a little table and some odds and ends over to contribute to Angie's flat, making sure to let her know they weren't anything she shared with Neil. Angie giddily admits she's serious about Neil and hopes he is about her too and Denise confides that she thinks Neil is going to ask for a divorce tonight.

Jack has had a kip in between shifts and is in a much improved frame of mind, telling Vera optimistically that they will manage with Tom just fine. But his enthusiasm is dampened slightly when, on his way to the fridge to get the sarnies that Vera has made him, he gets an earful of tasks to do for her before hand.

Ivy has apparently been contacted and was pleased to help out because she's in Gail's examining something of Nicky's that needs mending There's a knock on the door and Nicky admits . . . Carmel! (oh I started off watching this show thinking she must soon be due to make her reappearance!) Ivy is out of the loop so she innocently tells Carmel that Gail and Martin are out and when Carmel says she must speak to Martin, allows her to wait for them.

Meanwhile, Gail and Martin, now flush with loads of cash are out, not at a really smart restaurant like I would have been, but, you guessed it, across the road in the Rovers! How unimaginative! They're sitting with Audrey nattering about Ivy doing the sitting and Audrey is glaring over distastefully at the booth where Alf is STILL sitting with Harry Potts!!!! Still!! Harry came in a lunchtime, it's hours and hours later ... Did I mention how much I hate glaringly obvious continuity flubs? Anyway Harry is casting an appreciative eye over the buxom Bet and lithsome Liz, crudely remarking to Alf that man does not by "bed" alone but oh if they could!

Denise sweeps up the shop, studiously avoiding Neil's watchful eyes. He complains that she never sits and talks to him properly. She's unconcerned about his opinion, there really isn't much to say is there as long as nobody starts mud slinging. Neil realizes they are at cross purposes when she mentions that she assumed he's there to ask for a divorce. He nervously tells her that what he really wants is for them to get back together! Denise's jaw drops and she protests that it's not fair to Angie but Neil has realized that though Angie is great, it's made him realize what he's lost and he wants it back. He leaves it in her lap to think about and exits the shop.

Someone else is in for a shock too. Carmel is chatting to Ivy about nursing school when Gail and Martin arrive back, laughing, which is cut short in mid chuckle when they see Miss Thing sitting there like butter wouldn't melt! Gail tells Carmel she's not welcome but Carmel insists she needs to speak to Martin privately. Gail states that it won't be necessary and to say what she has to say and go. Martin loudly protests that he isn't interested in anything she has to say but (and remember, Ivy is still there) Carmel sets her jaw and tells Martin he might be interested to know that she's pregnant with his baby!

Diane Johnston

Harry Potts: RUSSELL DIXON
Written by TOM ELLIOTT Directed by (a cast of thousands including) HOWARD BAKER, CHARLES LAUDER AND BRIAN MILLS

Tuesday (3512, Monday 8 March 1993)

It's not yet seven a.m. and still dark outside the Platt house, but Martin's already up and dressed. When Gail joins him he frets over Carmel's claim that she's carrying his child. Gail tells him not to worry about it - "I know she's a liar, Martin," she assures him. He further frets over facing Carmel at class today and with Gail's support decides to take the day off school and review at home. Gail points out that this is just what Carmel wants - them obsessing about her. Nicky comes downstairs to all this serious discussion. "Are you talking about Carmel again?" he asks. "We've just finished," says Gail. Nicky's understandably puzzled about the goings-on - "Granny Ivy were dead nice to her," he ventures. "Granny Ivy doesn't know what we know," says Gail. Nicky points out that he (Nicky) doesn't know *anything* of what's going on and Martin informs him that he'd dead lucky on that count.

Granny Ivy and Don meanwhile chew over the scene at the Platts' the night before. There's no smoke without fire, declares Poison Ivy, always first to suspect the worst. Don reckons it all sounds like a Victorian melodrama. Ivy is surprised that Gail took it all in stride. Perhaps she was expecting it, suggests Don sensibly - when you consider it, it's the obvious next card for Carmel to play. He reassures Ivy he's sure Martin wouldn't risk his marriage for a quick romp [oh, the irony of seven years' hindsight!]. Nothing's gone on, he adds. "You can't be sure of that," says Ivy primly. "No, but I believe Martin's version," says Don, losing patience. There's the sound of a penny dropping as Ivy says "Martin's version of what?" "Er - whatever Carmel said." "You weren't there, though," Ivy continues suspiciously. "You didn't hear what she said." "No," Don tries to recover, "but I can imagine it." Don apparently imagines that Carmel said lot more than she did as he continues, "Look, drunk as y'are, y'know if ya... ya just know, that's all!" "Nobody said anybody was drunk!" says Ivy, knowing full well she's onto something now. Trapped, Don confesses that Martin told him about ending up accidentally sharing a bed with Carmel after he came home drunk from a party, but he adds that Martin says they didn't um, er, you know.

In the Caff, Lama the Misspelling endears herself to me yet again when she says (just as I would've) "I'm sorry, Gail, but I wish I'd seen Ivy's face!" Gail guesses that Ivy will tell Don but thinks she won't spread it farther. She doesn't know how far along Carmel is, she tells Alma, because she didn't want to give Carmel the idea she was particularly interested. "Anyway, here comes Big Ears," Gail says as Phyllis approaches, ending the conversation.

Phyllis confesses to Alma that she's distraught - she has won a competition - a hundred quid and a fancy dinner with "The Man in Your Life". Although she didn't mention Percy by name in her application he is the one she described in the write-up, and she is expected to come up with that man for photos and an interview. "I've made a fool of meself," says poor Phyl. She tries to enlist Alma's help in convincing Percy to take part. Alma is unsure that she could be of any help at all but she encourages Phyllis to come up with something - Phyllis could use that £100, Alma points out.

Martin is pensive as he stares into the distance instead of studying at home. There's a sharp rap at the door and he asks who it is before opening. It's just Sally, but her curiosity is piqued by his asking who was knocking - who was he expecting? Nobody, Martin mumbles. Gail told Sally that Martin was taking the morning off and she was just wondering if he was taking the afternoon off too. "What else did she say?" asks Martin sharply. Nothing, says a baffled Sally, she just wondered if they'd need her to sit David that afternoon, adding that there *is* something up, isn't there? He denies this, then apologizes for snapping at her, blaming his tension on the upcoming exams he's revising for. She suggests that the two couples go out that night to relax but he declines.

In the Rovers Neil approaches Denise, who reacts nervously and tries to leave. He pitches a reunion to her again, saying that they've made mistakes in the past but now they know what those mistakes are. "I can make you love me again. I know I can," he insists as Denise refuses to meet his eyes. She says that Neil isn't going to change and he responds that she's not being fair. How fair is he being to Angie? Denise retorts. "I like her," Denise says. "She's a friend." Neil just repeats that he loves Denise. Denise has heard enough and begins to leave the pub but literally bumps into Angie, who's arriving. Angie insists that Denise join her for one - and look! Here's Neil! Denise can sit with her husband - or should Angie say "ex-husband"? she teases. Angie plants Denise back in the booth with Neil. If she didn't know better, she continues merrily, she'd say they were up to no good! Cheer up, she continues to the miserable pair before going to the bar - she's paying!

Preoccupied Phyllis goes to Emily's to see Percy but he's out. She stops to talk to Emily about her dilemma. "Why on earth did you choose him?" wonders Emily. "You're not jealous, are ya?" asks Phyllis earnestly. Emily assures Phyllis this is NOT the case, then advises her to come clean with the magazine. Phyllis protests she hasn't been dishonest - Percy *is* the man in her life. She tries to enlist Emily's help in convincing Percy, and in fact leaves thanking the protesting Emily in advance for her assistance!

Reg stops by the store and chats up Audrey. He offers her a job in Bettabuys, but it's impossible to figure out if he's serious, flattering Audrey, or a bit of both.

Martin stops by the Cafe for a cup of tea and tells Gail that Sally and Kevin (who he saw in the Rovers at lunchtime and who was also prying about what had Martin wound up during Sally's visit) know something is up. He sighs that everything is getting him down and hopes he'll feel better tomorrow.

Percy comes home for his tea and grumbles about the committee meeting he's just attended. Specifically, someone else's concern (the toilet) was raised when Percy wanted his (the bowling green) dealt with. He stands on technicality - it wasn't the agenda for discussing toilets, it was the agenda for discussing bowling greens! Emily wonders resignedly if it has ever occurred to Mr. Sugden that sometimes people nees something beyond duty - a favour - something that would fulfill a great need even though Percy himself isn't in favour of it? If he's not in favour of it, says Percy, he wouldn't be much help, would he? If it's wrong, he's got to say so! Yes, sighs Emily, that's what she thought he'd say.

Gail goes to see Ivy, suppposedly to calm her mind of suspicions about Carmel & Martin. Ivy sets off Gail's judgmentalism-detectors immediately when she begins by saying that whatever's gone on between Martin and Carmel is no business of hers. Nothing has gone on, Gail says firmly. That is exactly what Martin is afraid of, she goes on, that Ivy will begin jumping to conclusions. Carmel's a born liar. Ivy is pulling all sorts of faces that say "Oh, *really*?" and "I suppose if you say so"! "She's sick," says Gail. "She's pregnant an' all," points out Ivy. "She's no right to accuse Martin!" says Gail. "I'm not standing in judgement, Gail," says Ivy sanctimoniously. "Aren't you?" spits Gail. "You're as bad as Carmel. I thought bearing false witness was supposed to be a sin. I knew I shouldn't have come here." Gail heads for the door, steaming. "She has got a right, Gail," Ivy says suddenly, stopping Gail in her tracks. "Carmel," continues Ivy. "She has got a right." Gail's expression shows she realizes that Ivy knows something she doesn't. She turns to face Ivy.

Alma, Mike and Percy are in the Rovers. Alma nearly drops a clanger about Phyllis' win and Percy's role in it but recovers when she realizes Percy's heard nothing about it yet. He's in a stroppy mood anyway, and when Phyllis comes in, bleats "Not you as well!" How does he feel about it? chirps Phyllis excitedly. "About what?" mutters Percy. About what Emily told him. She must've talked to him about it. She did talk about something, Percy confirms grumpily, more or less in riddles.

Angie and Curly share a booth. Raquel comes by and she and Angie have a half-hearted slanging match with each other, but neither's putting much effort into it. [I love the relationship between these two. They are too much alike, AND too different, to truly like OR dislike each other! They envy each other, it's clear; they often annoy the hell out of each other; but deep down they respect each other and even like each other. It is a very realistic depiction of a certain type of relationship between strongly-opinionated women, in my experience.] Angie excitedly expresses her hope that she'll see Neil tonight. Poor Angie! Don't you just hate dramatic irony sometimes?

At their table, Phyllis has broken the news to Percy. We know this because he jumps up and shouts loudly, "Are you mad, woman?" He continues to rant: "The answer is NO! If you want to make a fool fo y'self do so by all means, but DON'T include me!" Poor Phyllis! All eyes in the pub are on them. As Percy flees the bar he (inexcusably, in my opinion) says to some old duffers by the door, "I wouldn't be 'the man in her life' if hell had me!" "I did warn you," says Alma gently to Phyllis. "I have not yet begun to fight," says Phyllis firmly. Go, girl!

You could cut the tension in the air at the Platt's with a knife. Gail is steaming on the sofa, Martin holds his head in his hands at the kitchen table. "I had to learn it from *her*, didn't I?" seethes Gail. "Ivy." "Look," pleads Martin, "I just couldn't tell you, Gail." "You slept with Carmel? You couldn't, could you? Husband's don't!" "I told you, I was drunk," says Martin miserably. "I fell asleep..." "Yeah, while I was looking after Alf, I know," interjects Gail. "I didn't know until after I woke up! Y'know... Carmel must've... Gail, look, all I did was get in to the side of her, that's all." "That's all?" says Gail incredulously. "Yeah!" Martin replies defensively. "I trusted you, Martin. Have you any idea how big a fool I feel?" Martin approaches her. "Don't touch me," she spits. "You're a liar!" He's not, argues Martin. He was trying to protect her in his own stupid way. This [fighting between them] is what Carmel wants, he adds. "She's had what she wanted, Martin," says Gail in a ripping rejoinder. "You!" "I never touched her, I swear to you, Gail - I never touched her, you've got to believe me!" pleads Martin.

Gail reminds Martin that originally, he said "nothing" happened - but it turns out "something" did. She trusted him then - how can she believe him now? She asks him to confess and he insists that he's got nowt to confess. What other secrets is he keeping to "protect" her, wonders Gail bitterly. Martin looks at his wife, saying nothing, for there's nothing he can say.

ronniecat

Written by TOM ELLIOTT Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Wednesday (3513, Wednesday 10 March 1993)

Early morning on the street, and even though it's early March in Weatherfield, I daresay the air is warmer outside the Platts' house. Inside, things are frosty to say the least, with Gail making an early start for the Cafe in an obvious attempt to avoid Martin. He calls after her, suggesting they at least have a coffee together and talk, but she claims she hasn't time, and walks off in silence. She passes Don, who susses out what's happening, so he apologises to Martin for having told Ivy about Carmel's shenanigans. Martin holds no grudges, though, and only wishes he'd told Gail about the incident immediately after it happened. Now Gail won't believe his version of the story. Don advises Martin to speak to Carmel and set the record straight.

At the Corner Shop, Reg is flirting with Audrey and asks her if she was serious about coming to work at Bettabuys. Suppose there was a vacancy -- would she be interested? Audrey tries to laugh his proposal off by suggesting that she isn't qualified for the position, but Alf approaches, so Reg rushes off. Audrey tells him that Reg offered her a job, but before Alf can say anything, Phyllis comes in and asks Emily (who has been waiting patiently to pay for her groceries) if Percy is home. She asks if Emily would be kind enough to "stall" him until she can get a chance to talk to him. After Emily leaves, Alf tells Audrey that he's sorry he interrupted Reg, and sarcastically allows that he'd be happy to provide her with a reference.

Gail and Alma are discussing Carmel's recent declaration, with Alma being of the opinion that there must be "something" to it. Angie bounds in from upstairs and announces that she's having a flat-warming party on Friday. She'd like Alma, Mike, Gail and Martin to attend, and while Alma accepts immediately, Gail's mind is elsewhere, so she half-heartedly protests that she may not be able to find a sitter on such short notice. Angie unwittingly stirs the pot when she wonders why their "Irish nurse" can't do it, until Alma quickly tells her that she moved out.

Phyllis arrives at Emily's, and is disappointed to learn that Percy was already gone by the time Emily arrived home. Emily offers a cup of tea while Phyllis moans that she now wishes she'd never entered the contest. Now she's going to lose out on a bang-up meal in a posh restaurant, as well as the £100. Emily sympathetically suggests that she invite someone else, but Phyllis isn't interested in inviting any of the old geezers she knows. Her heart is set on Percy.

Jim, in his capacity as a security guard, arrives at Bettabuys to transport cash to the bank, so he's decked out in his uniform and riot helmet (but jokes to an amused Ivy that he wears it to defend himself from Liz). Meanwhile, Reg is telling Curly that they need to hurry and fill Vera's vacant position before she changes her mind and decides to come back. Curly has the feeling that Reg already has someone in mind, and hints that it's probably a "lady friend," but Reg won't give him any details.

At the Rover's Return, Mike asks Denise if her lunch (shepherd's pie) was good and decides to order it for himself. He offers her a drink, which she declines, and a few seconds later, Neil comes in and tries to get Denise to have a drink with him. She insists that she's already late back to the salon, so Neil asks if he can see her that night. "Fine," is Denise's response... "bring Angie." When Neil begins his protestations that he really wants to see her, she advises him to leave her alone!

Percy arrives back from his errand, and Emily tells him that Phyllis was by to have a word. Percy is his usual grumpy self when he hears Phyllis' name mentioned, but Emily appeals to his practical side by pointing out that Phyllis will forfeit not only a lovely meal, but £l00 - not a small sum to most pensioners. Percy harrumphs that she should have asked him before she entered the contest, and Emily agrees, but she also points out that Phyllis only used Percy's name because she knew that, being "a perfect gentleman," he would make a good escort. Percy begins to soften.

Martin and Tony are getting their lunch in the nursing school cafeteria when Martin sees Carmel sitting at a booth by herself. He excuses himself, telling Tony that he needs to speak with her.

Martin begins the conversation by telling Carmel he doesn't like her plan to wreck his marriage -- "it's working," he summarizes, "so congratulations." The babysitter from Hell won't be swayed, though, and insists that she is carrying his baby, or "our child," as she puts it. Martin's voice begins to rise (and his classmates are clearly listening) as he angrily protests that it isn't "our" anything, since he never laid a finger on her. Ah, but Carmel reminds him that they did spend a night together, to which Martin replies that spending the night together in a bed does not cause pregnancies -- or was she not listening when they covered that topic in the course? He implores her to think of what she's doing to Gail and to Nicky, Sarah-Louise and David. Unmoved by his pleas, Carmel continues to insist that she's going to have his baby. Out of patience, Martin tells her flatly that he'll never admit that it's his baby, "not now, not ever... so stay out of my life."

Alf is having a good time with Audrey's admission that Reg has offered her a job at Bettabuys, and takes every opportunity to point out how easy her life is (in his opinion) behind the counter at the Corner Shop. He wonders out loud, to Audrey's exasperation, how well she'd do on an eight-hour shift, stacking shelves, on her feet all day. "Happen they'll make an exception for hair appointments" he chortles. Ivy, who has the afternoon off, asks Audrey what Alf is on about after he goes elsewhere in the shop, and then wonders if Audrey has heard about Gail's "troubles."

Speaking of Gail, Alma is trying to get her to take the rest of the day off (probably because her long face is putting customers off their food), but Gail insists that she'd rather stay busy. At a nearby table, Phyllis apologises to Percy for involving him in her contest entry, and Percy informs her that he could sue her for it, although he won't. He feels that if he went along with her plan, she would probably "show him up" by acting silly at the restaurant, but Phyllis swears that she wouldn't, and that there would be no "undue familiarity." On those conditions, Percy agrees to go. An overjoyed Phyllis exclaims that she could just kiss him, but seeing Percy's startled face, agrees that she won't.

Gail answers the Cafe telephone to find her mam on the other end. Audrey launches immediately, asking her about the "tale" she heard from Ivy, that Carmel is pregnant with Martin's baby. An exasperated Gail informs her that "Carmel is a scheming little cow who wouldn't know the truth if she tripped over it."

Audrey offers to "be there" for Gail anytime she wants to discuss the situation, and as she hangs up, Alf takes the opportunity to remind her that she wouldn't be able to call up all her friends if she were working at Bettabuys.

Back at school, Martin intercepts Carmel after classes, and like a broken record, she repeats again that she is having his baby. Martin tries taking another tack, asking if she took a pregnancy test. Carmel claims that she tested herself twice before seeing a doctor who confirmed it for her. When asked, she says the baby is due on the 17th of September. Martin rolls his eyes and tells her that he doesn't believe her. Carmel insists that when he sees "the babby" he'll feel different. Martin suggests that she should go back to Ireland to have it, where she'd have her family's support, but Carmel responds that she wouldn't "have" Martin if she did that. Martin angrily reminds her that she doesn't "have" him now, and he's staying married to Gail, so "STAY AWAY," he yells before stomping off in disgust.

At Angie's, she teases Neil about seeing another woman, since they haven't seen each other for a few days (if she only knew!). She tells him of her plan to have a flat-warming party, and wonders if he'd mind if she invited Denise too. His face lights up when he agrees to the arrangement.

Martin is already at home when Gail comes through the door. She angrily tells him that she's about to have "a word" with a "certain lady," and while Martin tries to dissuade her, Gail marches straight to Ivy's house. As she bangs on the door and awaits an answer, she challenges Martin to guess who's been "spreading the news." When Ivy opens the door, Gail confronts her and asks if she'd mind not telling anyone else about Carmel. Ivy innocently protests that she hasn't told anyone, and indeed, wouldn't want to spread that sort of news. "Then how come me mam rings up?" Gail asks. "This has nothing to do with you... it's between me and Martin," Gail informs her, "so just keep your nose out of it, right?" As Gail heads home, Martin glowers at Don before the door is closed.

Inside, Don asks Ivy who all she told, and Ivy protests again that she's told nobody. "So what was that all about?" wonders Don. Ivy admits that she did tell Audrey, but only because she's Gail's mother and grandmother to the kiddies. Seeing Don's expression, she concludes "you're going to tell me I did wrong!" Don realizes that he shouldn't have said a word to Ivy... "I should have known what would happen." "So I *am* in the wrong?" Ivy concludes. A defeated Don tells her that she's right -- "you ALWAYS are." The old judgemental, holier-than-thou Ivy finally emerges (we knew she'd be back, didn't we?) when she proclaims "I'm certainly not going to be blamed for their sinful carryings on." But Don gets in the last word when he looks her in the eye and informs her in a sarcastic but quiet voice, "I told you. I did wrong. They did wrong. But not you."

Back to the pub for a little levity, Jim offers to buy Reg a drink, joking that he's feeling a little "flush" after helping himself to some of Bettabuys takings. Liz warns him that he ought to be careful about what he says, or he could find himself under arrest.

Elsewhere in the Rover's Return, Audrey hopes out loud that Gail is going to be alright, although she still won't tell Alf about the latest news. Alf takes the opportunity to remind her of yet another advantage of working in the Corner Shop -- she can yak on the phone all day to her daughter. Audrey has finally had it with Alf going on about her unsuitability to work elsewhere and tells him that he seems to think he has her "tethered" to the shop. "Watch this," she challenges him, as she approaches Reg and informs him that she'll happily accept the vacancy at Bettabuys, adding "Alf thinks it would be a good idea." The conversation is nipped in the bud, though, when Alf angrily tells Reg to stay away from his staff, and he unceremoniously drags Audrey off home before she can even finish her drink.

Angie, meanwhile, asks Raquel and Denise if they can come to her party on Friday. Raquel thinks she might be able to come later, after the pub is closed, and Denise accepts.

Back at the Platts', Martin tells Gail that he spoke to Carmel, and that she continues to insist that she is pregnant. He suggested that she go back to Ireland, but she's having none of it, so he feels he has no options. He simply can't face the proposition of seeing her every day at school, so he's come to a decision. He's going to drop out of the nursing course, tomorrow. "Suit yourself" is Gail's apparently disinterested response.

Heather Morlan

Tony Stephenson: JASON YATES Carmel Finnan: CATHERINE CUSACK
Written by PETER WHALLEY Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Thursday (3514, Friday 12 March 1993)

It's quiet in the cafe and Gail is tearfully filling Alma in on Martin's latest decision to quit college in order to avoid Carmel. Her greatest fear is that it will always be between them and he'll end up resenting her for it! Alma quietly suggests that she go to the college and speak to the principal. Gail wonders if that's such a good idea as she'd be doing it behind Martin's back but Alma thinks the school should know what's going on.

Percy sits at the table, head in hand. Emily witters on about having a light lunch as he'll be eating a fancy 5 course meal later with Mrs. Pierce. But he's not enthusiastic at all about spending the afternoon and evening with his admirer. Emily scolds him and reminds him that he promised and anyway, even if her admiration is only one sided, Emily has to admire Phyllis for her persistence, a quality he's always said he admired in the British people. True enough, he grudgingly admits and since Emily persuades him that she personally will be disappointed if he ruins Phyllis' day, he is resigned to go.

Curly is interviewing a woman in her mid to late 40's for a job at the supermarket, a woman with a lot of previous experience, Mrs. Naylor! Yes boys and girls it's the first appearance of Maureen Grimes Naylor with all dark brown hair and finely plucked eyebrows! Curly is pleased with her and tells her she may start tomorrow. Ivy brings some papers in to the office and is introduced to Maureen who is on her way out. Once she leaves, Ivy questions Curly's hiring Maureen without Reg's say so as it's well known that Reg prefers staff young and inexperienced. Curly thinks it's just desserts since he's brooked off the day to play golf.

In the pub, Percy is having a stiff medicinal brandy, much to the amusement of Liz, Alf, Kevin and Raquel. After he leaves, Alf tells the others about Percy's romantic troubles and Kevin laughs, hoping he will still be having women troubles at Percy's age. Talk turns to Angie's flatwarming party. Liz is going after work and Raquel is sulking because HerWayne isn't going. His coach refuses to allow his players to go out on a Friday night when there's a match the next day and Raquel is instructed to not even bother calling as he's going to have an early night (yes but in who's bed?)

Phyllis looks lovely, Percy even looks rather jaunty in his regimental blazer, red bow tie and flat cap. He needs a subtle warning from Emily when he starts grousing and he makes it clear he's only going for Mrs. Bishop's sake. Phyllis and Percy emerge from the house to a little crowd of photographers and a very annoying sugary sweet female reporter who's name, Penny Balfour, even annoys me. She gushes and fawns and encourages Phyllis to talk about her man. She tries to get the pair to kiss but Percy won't be having any of that, he only does his kissing in private... which only causes the reporter to gush more "Isn't that cute!" When asked to smile, Percy bares his teeth somewhat akin to a rabid dog and away they go in a white limousine.

Gail arrives at the school to see Mrs. Williams, the school principal. She begins to outline the situation, with Martin threatening to quit his course and proceeding to Carmel's involvement, describing Carmel in stalking terms. Ah, but it seems Mrs. Williams is aware there is a crisis at home and Carmel, ever one step ahead, has already been to see the principal to alert her that Gail might be around to complain about her. It sounds very much like the principal is leaning more toward Carmel's version of the story, in spite of the fact that Martin too has been summoned and has given his side of the story which of course is the same one Gail's just told. Martin's been in as well??? Gail's face falls (i don't know how you can tell really. With most people you can tell because their chin disappears against their chest but with RGail.. well... ) On the way out and down the hall, Martin sees her and runs after her calling but she either is too distracted and doesn't hear or is steadfastly ignoring him.

We are now in a beauty salon where Phyllis has had her hair done and is having her makeup done while Percy is highly embarrassed to be sat at a table having a manicure. He grumbles about women's salons and unisex being rubbish. Penny is still hovering and Phyllis makes a few remarks about Percy's illustrious army career.

Martin has rushed home to find Gail collapsed in a little heap on the couch. She is sickened that he has lied to her by omission and not told her that he had already been in to the principal and now wonders what else he's lied about and they row bitterly. How can she believe anything he says, she accuses!!!

Percy and Phyllis are surrounded by a flock of penguins... er. No. those are waiters in a fancy restaurant (anxious to have their photo taken i guess because i've never seen that many wait staff attending any table i've ever been at in a posh restaurant!) Percy views the food, revealed from under shining silvery domes, as highly suspicious. Nouvelle cuisine, looks fine in a glossy magazine but tasteless, he predicts. Penny is still patronizing them and drawing them out, trying to get them to make cutesy remarks and asks Percy to put his cap back on. He will not, he strenuously protests, he knows what's what and what it is is you don't wear your hat to the table and Phyllis backs him up on that point. Very well, one more photo and the reporters are going to leave them alone. Not before making a remark about it not being the man in your life that matters but the life in your man and actually uses the phrase "quietly raunchy" in reference to our Mr. Sugden which startles both Percy AND Phyllis. (oh dear, can you see the slant this article is going to take? )

Angie's party is well underway and the question of the day is how many people can you cram into a small flat and still have room to dance? Quite a few from the looks of it. Kevin and Sally arrive and are disappointed to hear that Gail and Martin won't be coming after all and there was no excuse given apparently. Denise is standing to one side, shaking her hips in time to some music with Neil lurking nearby, hoping to attend to her liquid needs. Curly notices that Neil has not seemed to have left Denise's side and points it out crassly to Angie who decides Curly's just jealous. Well he is, that's why he's pointed Neil's somewhat suspect behaviour, innit?

Over in a quiet pub, Reg is dismayed to discover there's a party going on and he wasn't invited. Raquel is just getting ready to go so he offers to see her safely to her destination. Ivy arrives and sees Audrey and Alma in a booth and is surprised because she thought Audrey was babysitting for Gail. Gail changed her mind, Ivy's told. Audrey and Alma talk quietly about the Gail and Martin situation. Alma recalls that Gail didn't come back to the cafe after seeing the school principal and they both figure it didn't go well and frankly, they don't know what to think over the whole sad case.

Raquel arrives at Angie's Reg in tow who has found it necessary to explain to Angie his knightly quest. He offers her a bottle and spies Curly so makes an excuse to speak to him in order to get an invitation to stay out of Angie, which of course she does do. He tells Curly about his ruse, cackling over his success. Curly informs Reg about the new hiree but Reg is dismayed to find out that the new recruit is more his age and experienced and despairs of Curly's choice. (ah just wait, Reg!) Over on the other side of the room (just spitting distance away, really) Denise has had enough of Neil sulking around her and grabs Jim to dance to an older song that would be familiar to them both.

A white limousine turns up Coronation Street to take Percy home. Phyllis thanks him for his cooperation but all he's anxious to do is have a decent up of tea, very glad it's over indeed. He gets out and she chuckles in the corner, basking in the glow of her day in the sun with her fella.

Back to the party, Neil is plastered now and decides to cut in on Jim and Denise's dance. They try to talk him around but when Reg adds his two cents in, quite reasonably requesting Neil to calm down, he gets violently thumped!! Angie, dismayed at the turn of events looks curiously and somewhat suspiciously in Denise's direction.

Diane Johnston

Mrs. Williams: GILIAN CALLEY Penny Balfour: JENNY LECOAT First appearance of SHERRIE HEWSON (Maureen Naylor)
Written by JOHN STEVENSON Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Friday (3515, Monday 15 March 1993)

Reg is fit to bust this morning, outraged as he is over the indignity he suffered at Angie's party the night before when Neil knocked him down with a punch aimed at Jim. As commerce is conducted in Bettabuys, Curly keeps pace with some effort, sympathizing as Reg rants but also trying to point out that Angie's feelings are also hurt. If he insists on prosecuting he's liable to look pretty stupid, Curly opines. Reg reluctantly agrees but vows that if Neil crosses his path, he'll knock his teeth out. Curly seconds the idea, albeit under his breath.

Elsewhere in the store, (on the loading dock to be specific) the new employee, Maureen Naylor, is being shown the ropes by Ivy Brennan. As Ivy gives her various pointers, Maureen seems more interested in learning about her boss than her job... "You say the manager's name is Holdsworth?" she asks. "What's his first name?" (More than idle curiosity here, as we see later.)

In the cafe, Phyllis is dreamily reliving her date with Percy. Unbeknownst to Phyllis, as she stands at the counter recounting her enchantment to Gail, Percy comes in and stays behind her listening. "But you know what the best part was?" Phyllis asks, starry-eyed... "Percy! I think this has brought us closer together!" Without waiting to hear another word, Percy turns on his heel and silently walks out, leaving Gail to chuckle in amusement at Phyllis' illusions.

Gail hasn't heard about the scrap at Angie's party the night before so she's clued in by Alma with Mike filling in the details. (How did they get to hear about it?) In the midst of this, Denise enters and goes up to see Angie. Mike complains that Gail and Alma are letting Angie "take over the place", borrowing glasses from the cafe as she did last night, and now having "half of Weatherfield" trooping up to her flat. Gail assertively defends Angie, saying her friends are nice people and she needs all the friends she can get at the moment, "especially if she's been run ragged by a fella" - not that a "fella" could be expected to understand!

Martin and Don are having a pint together in the Rovers, Martin confiding that he can't continue at nursing college while Carmel is there playing her games. Don is sorry to hear he's dropping out but understands the situation well enough. The thing is, Martin explains, they'll be short of cash so he wants to know if Don will share his taxi with him... Surprised by the suggestion, Don dismisses it out of hand. He suggests that Martin and Gail could better use the evening hours to get their problems sorted. Frustrated and annoyed, Martin suddenly quits the pub, telling Don to forget the whole idea.

In Angie's flat, Denise does her best to convince her that whatever ideas Neil has were certainly not encouraged by her! Angie has a tough time swallowing this, demanding to know if it was only coincidence that Denise happened to open her shop in such close proximity to her ex-husband. Denise allows that she made a mistake in not telling Angie when Neil came to her saying he didn't want a divorce but says she couldn't for fear of being called a "sour-faced bitch". Angie struggles to get her head around this revelation as she harkens back to Neil telling her just a week ago that it was *she* he loved! In a bid to console Angie, Denise tells her that despite the circumstances, they have got along well up to now - something she would hate to see spoiled because of a bloke!

Still moody, Reg is in the midst of taking out his frustrations on a young clerk when some of the staff pass by on their way to the lunch room. Among them is Maureen, who pauses to look back at him, smiling sweetly as their eyes meet. In stunned disbelief, he utters her name and we understand by the goofy expression on his face that she is someone very special to him. With a girlish giggle and a wave, she tells him she'd best get on with lunch, "Apparently the boss is a bit of a pig for punctuality!" As she retreats with the others, he gazes after her with what can only be described as the look of love.

Angie arrives by taxi at Neil's work-site, outside a building he's evidently doing some brickwork on. From atop his ladder, he looks down helplessly as she speaks her mind while his two apprentices watch the unexpected action. As they stare open-mouthed, Angie begins tossing Neil's personal effects into the rotating cement-mixer on the sidewalk. "Your wallet - you must have dropped it when you were accosting your *wife*! It has HER picture in it - I haven't counted the money!" (toss) "Two CDs, 'Distant Cousins' and 'Arrested Development'..." (toss, toss) Neil interrupts to tell the two underlings to take a break but they stand motionless as she continues. "And *this*!" (tossing what appears to be a neck scarf) before wiping her hands with satisfaction and getting back into the cab. The taxi pulls away and as his employees stare up at him in disbelief, Neil shouts back, "Take a break NOW or you're sacked -- and for God's sake, shut that mixer off!"

In the Rovers, Denise makes a point of thanking Jim for his chivalry at the party, as well as seeing her safely home later. From the other side of the bar, Liz overhears and it's obvious she didn't know her husband had escorted Denise home. He shrugs off the intimation that there was anything more to it but Liz angrily turns her back on him, cutting off the discussion.

Back in Bettabuys, Ivy's voice can be heard over the intercom, vainly paging Reg to the "goods entrance". Heedless of her calls, Reg has his chin firmly planted on a stack of boxes, from which vantage point he stands mooning at Maureen as she sits at her cash register. She looks over to offer him a shy smile and unabashed at being spied, he returns her smile, adding a little wave. Curly intrudes on his supervisor's reverie to demand why Ivy's call hasn't been answered, but Reg ignores the question and begins talking of his long-ago involvement with Maureen. "I asked for her hand, you know... she wasn't the marrying kind, then..." he reminisces. Curly interjects to say that he thought Reg claimed never to have been rejected by a lady until he was fifty! Shaking his head, Reg corrects him, "No, no - I was talking about *nooky* then, not marriage... and I believe I said forty..." Ivy appears, wanting to know why her repeated pages haven't been responded to as there's a problem requiring Reg's immediate attention. "Pages! Is that what you call them? Sounded more like jamming frequencies!" he retorts as he straightens his bow-tie and finally goes off to see to the matter.

Liz is still simmering with jealousy over Jim's attentions to Denise. When she pretends not to hear his request for a refill, he resorts to calling on Betty but is irritated when his wife springs into action a second later to serve Neil, who has just come in. Kevin casually asks Neil if he's sobered up since last night and Neil replies with a sheepish apology and asks if Kevin has seen Angie. He hasn't but warns that Reg Holdsworth is "on the warpath", seemingly with a view to suing for the assault. Ignoring this, Neil goes over to talk to Denise, sitting at a nearby table. She greets him frostily but he persists - all he wants to do is apologize, he maintains. "Well then - apologize!" she snaps. He does so and she moves to dismiss him but he pleads to be allowed to continue. Cutting him off, Denise warns that if he has anything more to say, he should say it to Angie, not her!

Having reconsidered Martin's request, Don goes round to see him now, license for the joint taxi-driving venture in hand. Martin is elated that Don has changed his mind but as the older man cautions, he'll make sure Gail knows it was his own idea. Don explains the way it works, licensing fees and rental of air-time and Martin says he hopes he can earn enough to make it worthwhile.

Reg locks the door to his flat and turns to see Neil Mitchell standing before him. Startled and nervous, Reg warns that he'll call the police but Neil smoothly assures him he only came to apologize. Weighing up his options, Reg grudgingly accepts the present of a bottle of whiskey that Neil holds out to him. As he locks it inside the flat, he turns to inquire whether Neil fits locks. When he replies that he does, Reg magnanimously offers to call it even if Neil agrees to install a new one for him. Agreed.

As Reg crosses to the Rovers, the bus comes to rest on the street. Before it pulls away again, one of the passengers, Carmel Finnan, takes a long look in the direction of Gail and Martin's house...

Audreh breezes into the cafe towards the end of the day to find Gail on her own. Mike has taken Alma to dinner and as Gail explains, she's just as glad to be on her own at present, staying late to clean the freezers. Audreh realizes how upset her daughter is and sits down to give her a pep talk. Gail confides that Nicky has been asking pointed questions about divorce, leading her to wonder just what Carmel might have said on the many occasions she was alone with her children! Audreh soothes that it can't be that bad but Gail breaks down with the admission that she doesn't know what's ahead. The phone rings and as Gail goes to answer, Neil enters the cafe and asks Audreh if Angie is in. Receiving a brusque reply from Audreh, ("Do I look like a receptionist?") he goes upstairs to see for himself. Meanwhile, when Gail picks up the phone, there is no one on the line. Mystified, she hangs up with a shrug.

Sitting back down again, she and Audreh continue discussing Gail's marriage troubles. Her mother listens in sympathy as Gail talks about her uncertainty whether to believe in Martin now. If only he hadn't lied to her - now, she doesn't know what to think! Softly, Audreh reminds her of the time Brian suspected that Sarah Lou was Ian Lattimer's child. "He turned out to be wrong, luvvie. But even after it was proved, you could never get things back on track, could you?"

Seated in the Rovers Return, Reg quietly recollects fond memories of his youthful love for Maureen. Ivy listens intently but interrupts to inform him that contrary to his impression, Maureen is not married, but divorced. Reg can hardly contain his pleasure at this news and we know the wheels are spinning furiously in his happy little head.

Again in the cafe, Gail tries to finish up her work now that Audreh is gone. She is interrupted again when Curly comes in asking for Angie. He's brought her a lovely bunch of daffodils and Gail begins to direct him upstairs before she remembers that Neil is already there. Not wishing to interrupt, Curly quietly leaves the flowers for Gail to deliver.

Upstairs in her flat, Angie tries to close the door on her errant boyfriend but he remains outside talking to her through the crack. She hears about his good intentions and his remorse at causing her pain. As he explains the history between him and Denise, that it was over before it began and that he never understood why - Angie's face begins to reflect her inner turmoil. Just as she appears on the verge of forgiving him though, she opens the door to face him. "Yeah, well - when you finish telling me what YOU wanted and didn't get, and what DENISE wanted and didn't get, try asking me what *I* wanted - alright, Neil?" The door slams and they part once more.

As Neil retreats from the cafe, Gail goes to the sink to fetch Angie's daffodils. She turns around to bring them up to her but stops dead in her tracks. Carmel stands before her, icy stare locking Gail in place. Trembling, she demands to know what Carmel wants. "Poor old Gail, you can't fathom it all out, can you?" she asks without flinching. "You don't even have the brains to see what's slapping you in the face!" she charges coolly. As Gail listens in shocked silence, Carmel accuses her of keeping Martin from college. Gail's anger rises as she blurts out that Martin isn't in school because he chooses not to be, not because of anything *she* wants! Carmel returns a look of defiance and Gail continues, "And what do *you* want, Carmel? Apart from a good psychiatrist?" Summoning all her strength now she warns the girl, "I didn't get this family easily - and I'll *not* let some twisted little girl like you take them away from me!" Unmoved, Carmel stops to have the last word before leaving... "No? Watch me!" As she goes out the door, Gail rushes forward to lock it behind her. With her back to the door, she slumps down in defeat, clutching her hands to her mouth to stifle the emerging sobs.

Anita Bélanger

Maureen Naylor: SHERRIE HEWSON
Written by PAUL ABBOTT Directed by ROMEY ALLISON


Originally transmitted: 17, 19, 22, 24 & 26 March 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 3 - Friday 7 April 2000
Episode Numbers: 3516 - 3520

Monday (3516, Wednesday 17 March 1993)

....wherein madness is unleashed.... "Divided from herself and her fair judgement" - Wm. Shakespeare, Hamlet

Most of the show centers around kith and kin discussing Martin, Gail and Carmel, starting in the cafe where Gail can't concentrate on her butter knife. Alma mutters sympathetically as Gail tells her about Carmel's visit to the cafe which shook her up considerably. She describes the younger woman as possessed, tearfully gasping that Carmel is determined to take Martin away. She believes Carmel will stop at nothing. Alma confidently assures her that martin will not leave her. Gail talks a deep breath, determined to put it out of her mind for the time being and continues to wield the butter knife as if the bread were Carmel's heart.

Meanwhile, Martin is delivering David to Sally's and yawning. I thought he was up all night taxiing but i'm confused as in the next scene Don is just coming home from a midnight shift. I know they're sharing the cab so were they both driving? Anyway, Sally asks Martin how it's going on the job front. Martin of course would like to get a hospital job of some kind but they're hard to come by without the qualifications he's just turfed into the bin. Sally seems set to try to get Martin to confide in her but all Martin will say is that he might not be cut out to be a nurse after all and he beats a hasty retreat. Sally and Kevin look at each other knowing there is more to this story than Martin is saying.

As i said, Don was working midnight and is wearily taking off his shoes and getting ready to have a kip. Ivy is banging on about Gail in not very complimentary terms nor Martin either, not surprised he's looking over the fence now he's had his time with an older woman. Gail's no better, Ivy thinks, running after a younger man, like mother like daughter. Oh it's Audrey's fault, says Don with a raised eyebrow but he can't stop her, she's on a roll, until he forces her to listen to herself, listen to her criticisms, tittle tattle, and nasty comments and then remind herself why they're married in name only. Ow.

Over in the corner shop Audrey is chatting to Alf about the same situation, deciding that Carmel really got her feet under the table when Gail and Martin went away for the weekend, That was the weekend Ivy was supposed to babysit only she were on the bottle so Carmel filled in. It's so obviously Ivy's fault! (LOL) Alf contradicts her but like Ivy's mind, Audrey's is on a one way train of thought.

Finally we've been given a moment's respite as we switch scenes to the pub. Some job that Jim had lined up for Andy's summer holidays has fallen through. Angie and Denise are still cool to each other even though Denise tries to make it up to her, insisting she wants nothing to do with Neil. That makes two of them and Angie makes it clear she's not ready to make peace.

Back to the subject at hand and Alf is of the considered opinion that Gail needs to seek marital guidance. What for? Audrey loses her eyebrows into her hairline, she's got her mother to talk to and "I'm an expert". Well after all she's married and if she can manage being married to Alf, that makes her an expert. Alf of course takes exception and they veer off into a bicker about his council meetings taking time away from her.

Sally is playing with the babies when there comes a knock knock knocking on her door. She and the children go to see who it is. (gasp!) it's Carmel! My heart fills with dread and the hair stands up on the back of my neck. She explains to Sally that she's stopped into the cafe and Gail has asked her to do a favour. David has been invited to his pal Steven's for a party this afternoon and Gail wanted Carmel to take him there. Sally is alarmed but stays calm and questions Carmel closely and decides to call Gail. By this time, Carmel has picked up David for a cuddle and looks for his coat. Carmel is a bit defensive at Sally for wanting to call Gail but tries to call her bluff. However, Sally isn't giving her the chance to slip out the back and asks to have David back. Carmel clings tightly to the little boy, aggressively sticking her chin out and accusing Sally of thinking she's a liar, protesting that she can look after David just fine thank you. Sally quietly insists on having the child back and Carmel turns away from her, still protesting so Sally threatens to call the police which prompts another barrage of abuse but Sally stares her down and Carmel reluctantly gives Sally David, whining that nobody every believes her. She falters and grabs her bag and leaves and after the door closes, Sally rushes to pull the chain over and clutches David to her protectively.

Close one!

A little light entertainment to soften the tension and we are transported to Bettabuys where Ivy and Maureen are busily stacking shelves. Maureen mentions to Ivy that Reg used to smoke a pipe when they were courting, mostly to try to impress her. Reg comes weebling past and stops to see how his Newly Minted Employee is getting along. He witters on about having happy employees, happy customers and a happy profit, looking very jolly himself as he and Maureen grin foolishly at each other. Astonishingly he then breaks out into a line from an old song "Only Youuuuuuuuuu, can make my dreams come trooooooooo"! Ivy looks startled too but Maureen just giggles like a teenager and he trots way on a cloud.

Sally has summoned Gail. She tells her that Carmel tried to get David off her and is highly alarmed that Carmel could try to snatch some other child. Gail is icily quiet and assures Sally that the police need not be involved, that Carmel was only after David. Sally continues to react to her fright and anger at Carmel until Gail sits her down and explains why Carmel wants David. It's because he's Martin's child and she has an obsession about Martin. She's even got herself pregnant and is telling everyone it's Martin's only it isn't. She's trying to break up their marriage and Gail is not having it! Thank God that shut Sally up for a minute or two!

Back to Bettabuys' staff room, Curly has tracked Reg down. He's on his tea break but Curly was surprised to see him slumming it in the staff room and not in his office. Japanese Management style, Norman, and he garbled a lot of management philosophy that i didn't bother to get because i and Curly both realized when we saw Maureen at a table, why Reg was becoming one with his staff. Fine, then, and Curly passes on a message to Reg which was why he was looking for him in the first place and then slopes off. Reg sits down with Maureen and the pair of them giggle and reminisce about Blackpool candy floss. But when he asks her out for a meal tonight, she turns him down regretfully as well as any other suggestion for an evening date though lunch is a possibility. But they are interrupted in mid flirt by Curly's insistent summons over the loudspeaker. He's doing this on purpose, you know, Reg insists with frustration and leaves with a sigh to straighten out his assistant manager on a few things.

Sally has now got the kids over at the garage and told Kevin all about her deranged visitor, smugly recalling that she always knew Carmel was bad news. Kevin wonders if the baby is Martin's even though Gail said Martin hotly denied it. Well he would, wouldn't he? Sally spits disdainfully. (would he?) She tells Kevin that Gail promised to get it sorted.

Yep, so she is. Gail is at a boarding house and about to climb the stairs to Carmel's room ...... (uh oh!)

Gail must have ducked out on a hair appointment because Denise is in the pub asking after her whereabouts. Neil shows up to talk to Denise but he barely opens his mouth that Denise is launched into a rousing ear bashing and tells him to just go away. But he stops her in mid rant (which Liz and Betty are listening to with great interest!) when he does an about face and tells her he doesn't want to get back with her after all and chalks his recent behaviour to a moment of drunken madness. He wants the divorce to go through swiftly.

Reg arrives at the pub and in a somewhat quizzical scene we see Liz simpering and flirting outrageously, even sliding the sweater with the wide neckline down over one shoulder at him to get him in a good mood so she can ask him for a summer job for Andy!!! I'm gagging here! He simpers back but says he's fully staffed at the moment and even blushes when he refers to his latest staff member filling the gap more than adequately. (what the hell was that all about!?)

Back to the boarding house. Carmel looks Gail in the eye and denies trying to take David. Sally made it up!!! She then tells Gail that she (Gail) can't go on denying things aren't the way they were. Gail knows she's dealing with a lunatic but isn't going anywhere until Carmel promises to stay away from her child and threatens her with the police if she doesn't. Carmel calmly accuses Gail of making up the story and bringing all this on herself, on purpose, subconsciously. She was never in love with Martin and couldn't admit it to herself. Gail listens with horrified amazement as Carmel continues, eyes dark and words voicing her twisted logic. That's why Gail put such pressure on her to move in with them, because she wanted Carmel as the catalyst to get out of her marriage. Interesting theory, Carmel surmises and (get this!) suggests Gail might see a psychiatrist! Gail then has her say and orders Carmel to stay away form all of them, Got it? Carmel just sighs and points out that Gail hasn't really heard a word she's said has she?

Carmel's not ranting or raving, she's not frantic or fragmented. She's confident and positive and seems to believe everything she's saying and is quite apparently barking mad!

Neil comes to see Angie to try to persuade her to give him another chance, even if it's only just as friends. Come for a drink and he'll bring her back and won't even expect a kiss on the cheek. No commitments, no pressure. But his campaign doesn't work because she insists she's not ready and isn't prepared to risk it. She knows they couldn't be just friends and she sends him out the door with a flea in his ear.

Martin arrives home just before Sally brings over all three kids, having given them their tea. They leave the children in front of the telly and retreat to the kitchen where Sally tells Martin what happened and that she knows the reason why as Gail confided in her, having no choice. She thinks Gail must have gone to find Carmel to have it out with her.

But Gail's given up on that and stalks out of Carmel's room, followed closely by Carmel who's now starting to babble a bit disjointedly about her feelings for Martin and the baby and Gail needing to give Martin up if she really loves him. They go down one flight of stairs and start down another, stopping on a landing at the turn of the steps. Carmel grabs Gail's arm tightly and begins to beseech Gail to let Martin go. Gail tries to release her arm from Carmel's grip but when she jerks her arm back, frightened now, Carmel won't let go and her body follows the movement and then she twists round and falls down the staircase with a scream. In a heap at the bottom of the steps Carmel moans and drags her hand across the floor toward her and cradles her stomach as Gail watches, stricken, from above!

Diane Johnston

Written by PHIL WOODS Directed by ROMEY ALLISON

Tuesday (3517, Friday 19 March 1993)

We once again begin the day by joining the Platts in progress. Gail fills the kettle. Martin tells her not to make herself a bundle of nerves - Carmel's "only busted her leg". Yes, says Gail, but there's an unborn baby to think of, isn't there? What if it had been hurt? In fact, what if it has? Martin promises to go to the hospital to see if the baby has been injured. Gail offers to go but Martin firmly points out that if Gail hadn't gone to see Carmel yesterday, none of this would've happened. Nicky comes downstairs and asks if they're talking about Carmel *again* (poor kid) and Gail snaps at him for his efforts.

In the shop, Liz and Alf offer their best wishes to an anonymous-extra customer. She's getting married on Saturday, Alf tells the arriving Raquel as the customer leaves. Raquel bitchily expresses surprise at this. "She's no Cindy Crawford, is she?" [Good grief, in that case what the hell is this gold band doing on my left ring finger lol!] Liz pointedly wonders if there's "any sign of it with Wayne". This makes Raquel a little less smug and she confesses he gets an attack of nerves at the mere mention of engagements. Anyway, she speculates Angie may be wearing a wedding band before she is. Liz has heard sommat about Neil and Angie falling out. Raquel says it was minor, but that she's surprised Angie can keep any fella - Angie's problem in Raquel's opinion being that she doesn't know when to keep it shut! She punctuates this statement with unconscious irony as she opens her own trap wide to take a large bite of apple as Liz and Alf exchange looks.

In the Cafe, Sally and Gail chat. They agree that Carmel's off her rocker. Gail takes a phone call from Martin and learns there's apparently little news on Carmel. Her leg is badly fractured and they've had to reset it. When she conveys this information to Sally and Alma, the latter suggests that's the best way for Carmel to be - unconscious - so she can't harm anybody else.

In Bettabuys, Ivy tells Curly that customers are complaining about the shopping trolleys' wobbly wheels. Curly says he's sent messages and memos galore to Head Office about the "Wobbly Wheel Affair", to no end. Ivy chuckles at his characterization of it as the "Wobbly Wheel Affair" and comments that it's too bad Vera's not there, she'd have something to say about that. They agree they miss Vera's humour. Reg strolls up, vibrating with self-satisfaction. He has an "executive meeting" at lunchtime; it could go into afternoon, being one of those "executive think-tank" things, and if he's late back he can count on Curly, right? Curly complains bitterly that he was due to go early today having worked until 9:30 the previous night, but of course he has no choice in the matter.

Back in the Cafe, Audrey and Alma agree that Carmel deserves everything she gets. Gail keeps reminding them that there's an innocent baby involved too. Audrey makes some snide remarks about Carmel getting pregnant and blaming Martin. Gail is sharp: "I'm the last to be defending her, but equally you're the last to be pointing fingers at girls who get pregnant." [There's that 20/20 hindsight again!!!] Audrey looks at her stonily. "Are you comparing me to her?" Alma begs them not to fall out, and Gail eventually apologizes to a deeply hurt Audrey. Gail then goes on to ask Audrey to fill in for her at the Cafe while she goes to the hospital. Audrey and Alma say she's crazy but Gail declares that if anything happens to that baby, it's on her conscience!

At Bettabuys, Reg is making "executive notes" for his "executive meeting" on a clipboard - a drawing of a large heart with an arrow through it and the initials "R.H."! He is also making "executive dining plans" on the phone with Nico the mâitre d': a table for two and a bottle of fine wine on ice. "Un bientôt, (sic) then," he finishes hilariously. After making these plans, he bumps into the lovely Maureen. She simpers and flirts as he waxes poetic about their luncheon plans, saying that finding her again was the best thing that ever happened to him. Tragically, Maureen must cancel. She's had a phone call - personal business that can't wait. She assures Reg before scurrying off that she is as disappointed as he is, but seeing Reg's face as he rips the heart drawing from his clipboard, crumples it and throws it to the floor, one wonders if she could be.

In the Rovers, the prodigal MacDonald son returns to warm greetings from Liz. She suggests that Andy might approach Reg about a job for the summer.

Martin is *not* pleased to see Gail arrive at the hospital. He told her to keep away, he hisses. Gail replies that she's not a child and had to come. She stops a doctor who's passing by and asks if he knows anything about Carmel Finnian's condition. Are they relatives? he asks. Martin hesitates before saying they're friends, but adds that all her relatives are in Ireland. This loosens the Doctor's tongue [isn't it convenient how medical staff in soaps are always brutally tight-lipped when convenient and incredibly irresponsible with information when convenient?] and he says that other than a nasty fracture, Carmel's a lucky girl. What about the baby, asks Gail anxiously. "Ah - what exactly do you know about that?" asks the Doctor cautiously. "Just that she's three months pregnant," says Martin. "That's what she told us," says the physician. "However, we did a thorough examination, and I'm afraid she's mistaken." Gail and Martin exchange thunderstruck looks. "What?" asks Gail incredulously. "Ms. Finnian isn't pregnant. She never was," says the Doctor, leaving Gail and Martin to gaze at each other in disbelief.

After an ad break, we see Gail scurrying down some stairs in the hospital. She's going to KILL Carmel, she says (and who could blame her for wanting to?). Martin chases her and stops her. This is a hospital, it's not the place for this, Martin points out, and indeed several people have stopped and are staring at them. He puts an arm around Gail and they leave together.

Curly is lending a sympathetic ear to Reg in the Rovers. Reg mustn't let one broken date get him down, Curly urges. Reg admits he can't cope with rejection. (Curly notes he's not exactly fond of it himself!) When he and Maureen broke up the first time it broke Reg's heart, he moans. So why did they break up, wonders Curly. "She had a mother," Reg says ominously. Curly points out that so did Kimberley, but apparently "Mummy" wasn't like Maureen's mother! "For some unfathomable reason, she loathed the sight of me!" Reg remembers. Andy approaches the pair regarding work openings at Bettabuys and Reg goes off on a rant at him about there being a recession on, and about Andy living in the cloistered walls of academia while out here in the real world they bleed real blood and sweat real sweat. Andy rolls his eyes and leaves mid-rant. Raquel points out that Reg is just jealous of Andy's youth and opportunities.

Audrey's neither use nor ornament in a corner of the cafe, fretting over Gail's situation. Just then, Gail and Martin arrive and bring the news of Carmel's deception. "After all she put you through!" Alma says sympathetically. Martin wanted to take Gail home, but she would rather be in the Cafe than at home stewing, she says. Martin is solicitous of Gail and confirms that she will be all right now before preparing to leave - he's "got something to sort out," he explains.

Back at the pub, Curly's about to leave but Reg urges him to stay. "Women may be fickle but we men don't desert each other when the chips are down," he declares. Just then, however, Maureen arrives. Ivy told her that this was Reg's local, and she felt so bad about canceling their date she changed her plans and tracked him down. His face beams as she asks if she may join them. Oh, and after getting the drinks in, Curly can go, adds not-at-all-fickle, never-one-to-desert-a-fellow-man Reg!

Martin, of course, went directly from the Cafe to the hospital to confront Carmel. "Martin!" she sighs rhapsodically. "I knew you'd come!" He is having none of it and immediately flies into her about her lies. "I'd never lie to you, Martin!" says Carmel with the calm conviction of delusion. "I love you too much." Martin says she's ruined his whole life - that's not love, it's sick! Carmel counters pleadingly that all she ever wanted to do was give to him... give him a child... "There is no child! There never was!" shouts Martin.

Carmel falters and a shadow flits across her face as her fantasy is momentarily breached. She composes herself. "There will be one day," she says doggedly. "No, Carmel, just shut up, just shut that witchy mouth of yours!" rages Martin. His angry words have attracted the Doctor, who demands to know what's going on. "She's EVIL," Martin says. He goes on to tell Carmel to stay out of their lives. The Doctor says Martin must leave now or he'll summon security. Martin warns Carmel one last time to stay out of his lives before leaving.

In the calm after the storm, Carmel suddenly calls a nurse over. "There's something I have to tell you," she says.

Angie's relaxing her her flat when there's a knock at the door. Who is it? "Neils on Wheels," is the reply, and when she opens the door, sure enough, there's Neil, with meals, on wheels (roller skates)! She tells him he's mad. He's brought frozen meals, wine, and even a bottle of bubble bath so that Angie can take a long relaxing soak while he prepares the food. (Are you men taking notes?) She's dubious and he admits to her that he did care for Denise but that pride had a lot to do with his campaign to win Denise back. However, he adds, "nothing like a short sharp shock to fetch the picture back into focus". So he's over it, just like that? she wonders. Not "just like that", he admits, but "one of these days you'll know I mean it when I say it's only you." Angie thinks for a moment, then says she likes hers medium-rare, and goes off to take that bath. (And have a good hard think, no doubt.)

Gail comes home to find Nicky at Mark's, Sarah Louise at Sally's, David in bed and Martin preparing supper. All she has to do, says Martin, is put her feet up. "And we can pretend we're a loving couple having a cosy evening together," she says cynically. [Oh no! Will it never end?] No, admits Martin, but they can make a start - because if they don't they let Carmel win, don't they?

Reg and Maureen chat intimately in a booth at t'Rovers. Raquel, Liz, Ivy and Andy, all at the bar, speculate about the kind of woman who'd find Reg attractive. "She looks quite normal," muses Andy with some surprise. "Actually, she's very bright," contributes Ivy. All three of her companion's heads snap towards her at this declaration. "She must be. She didn't marry 'im!" chortles Ivy. At the table, Reg is telling Maureen that his marriage was to the wrong woman. Maureen, on the other hand, was "the stuff dreams are made of" - how did they let it slip away? They were too young to fight for it, in Maureen's opinion. "We should've stood up to my mother." Reg, wishing to appear magnanimous in front of Maureen, calls Andy over and offers him that job after all.

Neil and Angie eat their meal. Neil asks if they can start from scratch. No, says Angie, to Neil's initial disappointment ... but... instead she suggests they "go for broke" and he move in! He is a bit surprised but seems to agree and they seal the deal with a kiss.

Gail and Martin have also finished their meal but the mood at Platt Palace is quite different than that at the Freeman Flat. Gail says it was nice, then grabs her purse to go collect Sarah Lou. Martin, however, knows they need to talk and asks her to sit down with him. How does she feel now, honestly? Angry; hurt; relieved, she says. Martin? Much the same, he says. "I love you, tich," he says softly. "I love you too," says Gail. "C'mon, give us a hug, then," urges Martin. But Gail says "don't do that," and pushes his arm from her shoulders. "Do what?" asks the confused Martin. "Pretend this whole...nightmare can be got over with a bit of a kiss and a cuddle," she says. Martin says he wasn't pretending that, but it would be a bit of a start! "You don't understand, do you?" says Gail. "It's all tainted!" "WHAT's all tainted?" asks poor Martin. "Us," says Gail. Martin points out for the umpteenth time that Carmel was lying and Gail points out for the umpteenth time that she was lying about being pregnant but not about sleeping with Martin. Gail is standing up now. Martin sighs that he's explained it over and over - surely Gail doesn't still think they made love? It doesn't matter, says Gail [eh??] - the fact is, he spent the night with her in their bed. "Now every time you put your arms around me all I see is you and her." "That's ridiculous," says Martin helplessly. It may be, but it's how Gail feels. Martin is now on his feet, too. What is Gail saying? he demands. "Because of this things are never going to be the same between us? What's next? Separation? Divorce?" Gail asks him to calm down. That's not what she wants. What *does* she want, asks an exasperated and frustrated Martin. She wants it to be like it was, she says quietly, but it's not going to be easy - and it's not going to happen overnight.

Close up on Carmel's bruised face filling our screens. "She's hated me ever since me and Martin fell in love," she is saying darkly. "She's much older than him, you see, and madly possessive. His happiness doesn't even count!" We pull back to view her whole bed, and standing next to it, two police officers! One speaks. "It's a very serious accusation you're making, Ms. Finnian," he says gravely. "Now, are you quite sure about what happened?" Carmel nods grimly. "Absolutely, Officer. Gail couldn't bear the thought of losing Martin, so she wanted me out of the way. That's why she pushed me down the stairs!"

ronniecat

Dr. Miller: ROBERT CALVERT Carmel Finnian: CATHERINE CUSACK PC Dean: FERGUS O'DONNELL
Written by ADELE ROSE Directed by ROMEY ALLISON

Wednesday (3518, Monday 22 March 1993)

Another morning, with the usual routine at the Platts' home as they get ready for school and work. Martin isn't too chirpy, though, and when Gail tries to open a discussion about last night, he shrugs it off as not mattering. Gail realizes that he went to a lot of work, preparing a meal, setting up what had the potential to be a romantic evening, but she couldn't... well, you know... she just wasn't in the mood. They're interrupted by Sarah-Lou, so while Gail goes off to take care of the child's needs, Martin answers the knock at the door. He's shocked to be confronted by two police officers, who ask to speak to Gail. Martin explains that he's Gail's husband, and they can talk to him, but since a Miss Carmel Finnan has made a rather serious charge against his wife, it would be best if they spoke to her.

Over the road, the Duckworth's frugal budget has reduced Jack to having tea and toast for his breakfast. He complains to Vera that she can't expect him to put in a full day of hard work, shifting crates up and down the cellar stairs, without a decent breakfast of eggs and bacon. Vera goes back to her usual line that there's bound to be some sort of compensation soon over Lisa's death, but this is cold comfort to Jack.

Inside the Platt's residence, Gail is aghast at the allegations Carmel has made. Martin tries to explain that he met Carmel at nursing school, took pity on her because she seemed so lonely, invited her to live with them, and the next thing they knew, she was insisting that she was pregnant with his child. Gail only went by Carmel's place to try to talk some sense into her. The police, however, contend that Carmel is charging that Gail purposely pushed her down the stairs in an effort to hurt her. Martin is at the end of his tether with all the problems Carmel has caused, so he tells the police that Gail has to get to work and the children need to get ready for school. The police won't be put off that easily, though, and inform Martin that if Gail won't answer their questions there, they'll have no option but to take her to the police station. Seeing the dramatic turn this situation has taken, Gail calmly asks Martin to take care of the children while she talks to the police. After Martin has left the room, Gail explains that her husband has been overwrought by recent events, and offers tea to the officers.

At Bettabuys, Andy is being shown the ropes by Curly, but it doesn't take long for his eyes to stray toward the attractive cashier named Amy Nelson. Seconds later, Jim shows up in his security garb, and Reg takes the opportunity to complain that they're late with their small change allocation, which he claims has prevented the cashiers from doing their job. Oddly, there seem to be no customers queued to pay for their purchases yet. Reg's officious demeanour changes immediately when he sees Maureen rushing onto the shop floor, obviously late. She stops to apologize for being tardy, but Reg is too happy to see her to give one of his usual lectures.

Martin shows up at the Cafe, and obviously Alma has already been apprised of recent events, since she asks if the police arrested Gail. Martin responds that they only took a statement from her before leaving. He unhappily notes that this will well and truly put an end to his nursing career, since there's no way he could return to school once this story gets around.

Over at the hospital, an elderly gentleman bearing flowers arrives at Carmel's room. Her eyes light up immediately and then fill with tears when she sees her grandfather. He gently asks what happened to her, and Carmel spins her yarn of how she came to live with friends. The man, she explains, fell in love with her, the wife became terribly jealous and went around to her place to warn her off. This awful woman pushed her down the stairs. She ends this bit of fiction by stating that Martin loves her, and that's the problem.

Deirdre helps Vera manoeuvre the baby's carriage into the Corner Shop and compliments her for taking on such an onerous task at her age. Vera isn't her usual stroppy self whenever this topic comes up, though, and instead mumbles a bit before finally screwing up the courage to ask if she could get some baby food on the tick. Deirdre reminds her of Alf's strict rules about credit, stating that he would "go mad" if he learned about it, but when Vera pleads that she has nothing to feed Tommy, Deirdre softens and tells her to get what she needs -- but not a word to Alf!

Meanwhile, Jack is begging Raquel for the loan of a tenner until payday. Raquel tells him he must be joking, but when she realizes that he only wants the money to buy nappies for the baby, she quickly relents and gives him the money. Moments later, Richard Willmore arrives at the pub and is shown into the back for a word with Bet.

Martin is hoovering when Gail arrives home early from the Cafe. She just couldn't blot out all the events of the day, so felt useless at work. "Why did we have to meet her?" Gail wonders out loud, but before Martin can answer, there's a knock at the door. It's John Finnan, Carmel's grandfather, and he asks if he can please talk to them as there are things that need "sorting out." Martin has had it up to his ears with Carmel, so isn't receptive at all, but Gail intercedes and allows the man to come in.

Richard Willmore refuses the drink Bet offers, prompting her to note that he has "no drink in hand, and no smile." She therefore assumes that he's there to give her her marching orders, since her probation period is now finished. To her great relief, though, Willmore admits that while their relationship hasn't been exactly harmonious, the pub's takings have increased, so they have decided to renew her contract for another year.

Meanwile, John Finnan tells Gail and Martin that he needs to know what really happened with Carmel. Gail explains that she only visited Carmel in order to ask her to stay away from Martin and her children. Ah, but Carmel told her grandfather that Martin was in love with her. Martin rolls his eyes and repeats for the nth time that he *DOES NOT* love Carmel. They felt sorry for her, which is why they invited her to live with them. Martin tries to explain how Carmel managed to spend a night with him, while Gail tells him about the pregnancy story she concocted. "Oh God," John exclaims, as the pieces begin to come together. He believes the Platts because... this is not the first time this has happened! Three years ago, they experienced the same problem with Carmel when she claimed that a neighbour was in love with her, and that she was carrying his baby.

Mr. Finnan explains that Carmel was born out of wedlock to their teenaged daughter. He and his wife raised the baby as their own, and Carmel did not know that her older sister was actually her biological mother. At the age of 14, Carmel learned the truth, and that seems to be when the problems began. She became infatuated by their married neighbour, MICHAEL, and caused the couple a great deal of grief when she began telling everyone that she was pregnant with his baby. Her grandparents realized then that she needed professional help, so she was hospitalized for a year. When she was discharged, she seemed to be cheerful, well-adjusted, and eager to begin training to become a nurse. Her grandparents thought that sending her to England would give her a fresh start. "You're good people," he summarizes, and he's dreadfully sorry for all the problems Carmel has caused them. He assures Gail and Martin that the charges will be dropped that day and that he plans to take Carmel back to Ireland where she can get the help she needs.

Back at the Rover's Return, it's free drinks for Raquel and Jack when Bet gives the good news of the lease renewal. Councillor Potts, as usual, is happy to cadge one too, having overheard Bet's announcement.

At Bettabuys, Andy does his best to chat-up the lovely Amy, but his attempt at flirtation is interrupted when Reg breezes by and tells him there are better things for him to be doing. Reg then approaches Curly and wonders if he might suggest an appropriate poet for reading to a "playmate." Curly thinks that Keats, Shelley, or Byron might fill the bill, but Reg thinks Keats is a bit "dark" for that sort of occasion. Perhaps one of the Russian poets, then, suggests Curly, such as Yevtushenko.

Jack pops home for a few minutes to deliver the nappies he bought with the loan from Raquel. He also produces a six-pack of beer that he was hiding behind the package of nappies, causing Vera to go into one of her tirades -- while she was out begging for credit, he was wasting their money on beer. Jack quietly reminds her that she hasn't been out to the pub for ages, so he thought it would make a nice surprise, but Vee only shrieks that it's a surprise she could live without. A disheartened Jack quietly skulks back to work, and Vera's expression gives us to believe that perhaps she shouldn't have been so shirty with him.

Reg stops for another private tete-a-tete with Maureen, this time to tell her that he wanted to invite her to the theatre but doesn't have her telephone number. Maureen puts him off by claiming that she can't give him the number as yet, since they're in the process of getting a new one after several nuisance calls -- but she would love to go to the theatre. He tries to impress her by suggesting that perhaps afterwards they could retire to his place to enjoy reading some of Yevtushenko's poetry. Maureen giggles that it makes a change from seeing his "etchings."

Bet and Rita enjoy a quiet drink in Bet's living room, while Rita comments that Bet must be relieved by the lease extension. Jack wanders through, and Bet can tell from his demeanour that he's down in the dumps. When she tries to get him to talk about it, Jack will only say that things are hard at the moment, but they'll manage.

Back at the Platts', Gail expresses her sentiments that in spite of everything that's happened, she can't help but feel sorry for Carmel and her granddad. Nevertheless, she's relieved that it's all behind them now, and things can finally get back to normal, but Martin isn't quite as enthusiastic. He can't get the whole sordid mess out of his mind, and he's clearly unhappy that "when push came to shove," Gail didn't believe his side of the story.

Mr. Finnan arrives back at the hospital to see Carmel, and when she sees a nurse packing her things into a small suitcase, she correctly assumes that she's leaving. "We're going home," he announces, "your grannie's waiting to see you." Carmel smiles and simply answers "okay."

Heather Morlan

Amy Nelson: LOUISE DUPREY John Finnan: SHAY GORMAN Richard Willmore: OLIVER BEAMISH Harry Potts: RUSSEL DIXON WPC Atkinson: TRACY HAYES TURNER PC Dean: FERGUS O'DONNELL
Written by KEN BLAKESON Directed by DAVID RICHARDS

Thursday (3519, Wednesday 24 March 1993)

Tossing and turning, Martin can't sleep. He's still upset with Gail and won't make up with her even though she tries to hug him. He shrugs her off and decides to get up and make coffee, clearly stating he'd rather be alone.

Jack and Vera are having a long night too, up with a teething baby. And near the end of their rope. No sleep, no money, Vera doesn't know what else to do though, someone's got to look after Tommy until Terry gets out. She's not having them Horton's get their hands on him, not even for a break because they'd never get him back!

A little later, (the sun's probably up, just) Angie is seeing Neil out through the cafe. Mike and Alma catch them in a cuddle. Mike must have got up on the wrong side of the bed because he grumbles and shouts at them for their disgusting display of affection in a place where people have to eat. (It was only a kiss and a hug!!) Angie doesn't mind and goes back upstairs. He has a go at Alma too but she just kisses him and pats him on the head and tells him to be a good boy (ok i made that last bit up but she did kiss him patronizingly and then pretend to be shocked because they aren't supposed to do that sort of thing in a cafe!)

Andy keeps finding excuses to present himself for inspection at Amy's cashier post. If he had been a peacock he would be feather tails waving! (Have you ever heard a peacock calling? Sounds like Vera Duckworth in a rage! I know i digress but there's so much angst and depression and just general weariness that i had to lighten it up somehow!) So anyway they make a date for lunch before Reg swings around to scold them for fraternizing on company time. He even quotes the rule book chapter and verse that expressly forbids it. They just roll their eyes and get back to work. (another digression, have you noticed that man walks like he's got something uncomfortable in his pants? Yes, i know what you're thinking. You didn't know it was possible for something that small to be uncomfortable but that wasn't exactly what i had in mind!) Do i have to finish this ? *sigh* oh ok. Anyway Reg proceeds to fraternize with Maureen, reminding her that they have a theatre date for tonight. She's forgotten and wheedles permission for a long lunch out of him. Ivy can't cover for her as it's her afternoon off so Andy is commandeered and thus scuttling the lunch date he had. Maureen ought to take Andy with her to the hair salon as his golden locks need a good seeing to. At least a bottle of shampoo. I have nothing against the ponytail he's taken to wearing but the rest of it is stringy and greasy and has me heaving everytime i see him.

Now we're in the Cafe and Gail is moaning. Well did you think she'd be jumping for joy now that the whole Carmel episode is over? Course not! Martin's angry because she believed he did more than sleep with Carmel and got her pregnant! Gail is nearly in tears over it, feeling guilty over it all and feeling guilty even about Carmel, as Carmel really couldn't help herself, being as her cheese slid off her crackers and all. She's been a self pitying sorry excuse for a partner all morning and Alma probably wants to see the back of her but politely suggests Gail take the rest of the day off. That's no good because apparently Martin wants to be alone to sulk on his tod. Just as well, the pair of them together would be like the Pity twins. Alma pretends to sympathize but makes Gail feel worse when she comments that she always thought Martin was one of the good ones and doesn't think Gail will have any trouble with Martin in the future. Wanna bet?

Speaking of oily and greasy, Harry Potts finishes a drink in the Rovers and tell Bet he'll let her know as soon as he hears anything (about what???) Jack is moaning to Don and Ivy about his situation. At Bet's suggestion, to cheer Jack up as he's been like the Ancient Mariner lately, Don is to take Jack out for the night. Ivy suggests she and Vera go with but Don, not wanting to spend any more time in his wife's presence than necessary suggests a girls' night at Bingo instead so that's settled. Martin comes in just then but is stopped in his tracks by a few well placed snide remarks from Ivy and he turns around and leaves again with a brief comment about interfering neighbours or something like that. Over in a booth Mike is giving Neil a hard time about the performance this morning (I'll bet Angie could fill us in on his performance last night!) but is stunned when Neil says he's moving in at the end of the week and won't need to be treating the flat like a doss house as Mike had accused.

Harry is now in the corner shop spreading more good cheer. After he leaves Deirdre nearly shivers in revulsion and she and Alf discuss their distaste for the man. What some folk won't elect! Martin comes in to buy some lager and snaps Alf's head off when Alf congenially asks if Martin's going to be back at college soon. Martin stalks off with an even bigger knot on his face and chip on his shoulder than he came in with.

Mike meets Mark after school and drives he and Nicky back to Coronation Street. Mike asks about Easter holidays. Mark tells him that Ken wants the three of them to go to Brittany in France. Mike of course thinks that's a poor excuse for a holiday. No flies on Mark, though, and he cannily drops a hint so big it registers on the Richter scale, saying "I wanted to go to Eurodisney, not Brittany". Mike obligingly takes up the hint and offers to take him. (Maggy's going to hit the roof!)

Oh my, seems Andy must have heard me because he's washed his hair and changed his clothes, ready for a night out with some people from work (any guesses as to who's counted among that crowd?) Ken arrives and Deirdre accepts his offer of a drink. She asks after Maggy and wonders how serious the relationship is. Ken tells her about the impending holiday in Brittany so that he and Mark can get to know each other better outside of school. Deirdre surmises wedding bells might not be far off. Ken's smug look in return suggests she might not be far wrong.

Martin was supposed to make tea for the kids including Mark but instead has left a mess of lager cans behind along with a vague note and disappeared. Gail phones Sally and says she'll be over to get the kids and then makes the boys clear up.

Maureen shows off her hair do to Reg who is suitably admiring. Maureen is introduced to Bet but the look on her face after a rather bawdy joke is priceless as she proclaims Bet rather common. (You're sitting there with Reg and you call Bet common?????) Reg defends Bet saying she's got a heart of gold which of course makes Maureen sit up with a spark of jealousy that Reg might be more than friends. She's also surprised that someone so sophisticated would call someplace as "quaint" as the Rovers his local. Reg deigns to drink with the common folk as part of his quest to be a well rounded manager (well he's got the well rounded part worked out, sez Mrs. Kettle LOL) Reg shows just how sophisticated he is by referring to the play as "Lez Mizera BALL ez", commenting "I like opera, me!") Gail pops into the pub looking for Martin. Ivy and Vera are there for a drink before Bingo and Ivy tells Gail that Martin was in earlier, looking surly and nearly bit her head off! (And with damn good reason too!)

Where Martin is, is drinking (still) at the White Swan where Stella Rigby is just offering Harry Potts a complimentary drink so he'll be sure to let her know about some road scheme (wonder if that's what Bet was on about too, and Harry's going round to all the local landladies buttering them up and cadging free drinks? Probably!) Don and Jack burst in and see Martin and join him. Amazing that a man that's obviously been drinking all day is remarkably sober.

Mark gets home, gossiping about Martin's absence and empty lager cans. None of our business, Maggy primly admonishes. She offers Mark the holiday brochure on Brittany but is appalled when Mark tells her than Mike has offered up Mickey Mouse on a plate.

God if Mike doesn't stop grousing about Angie someone's going to shoot him and serve him under glass! He's at it again at Alma in the pub. The conversation turns to trust, Alma freely admitting she loves Mike but it had nothing to do with Trust. Ivy and Vera return from Bingo in a very good mood. Vera's won 20 quid and gained some optimism, hoping that finally her luck is changing. She hopes that Jack is having a good time too.

Good time? This whole conversation between Jack, Don and Martin was rather muddled and confusing, but then it would be if you three had been out drinking for hours. Jack drunkenly advises Martin that he should have lied to Gail all along. They expect it anyway. It's the way they've been brought up by their mothers, never to trust men so you might as well lie. But to confuse the issue you should never admit to anything you've done wrong either. Don points out that lying lost him a leg. Martin moans that the whole point was that he wasn't lying and didn't do anything in spite of the grievous amounts of circumstantial evidence that Don mentions. Jack's parting shot: after Jack describes his and Vera's relationship in less than glowing terms, Martin remarks that he and Gail aren't like that. Jack confidently predicts, You'll get there in the end. Don even seems inclined to agree.

Reg takes Maureen him after the show but every time he tries to get cozy, she finds an excuse to look in her bag or move away. She thanks him for the lovely evening but puts him off when he suggests coming inside for a nightcap although she does it so smoothly and complimentary that he doesn't twig that she seems to want to avoid getting too close to him even though she flirts with him non stop all day at work.

Martin finally comes home. Gail plays it cool and doesn't throw the dishes that she has in her hands at his head. She just says balefully that she was worried and he sheepishly apologizes for being so late. He tells her he was drinking at the White Swan but isn't drunk. Not much anyway, funny how you can never get drunk when you really try. (ya think?) He mentions seeing Don and Jack. They're both awkward but then he gets tearful (how drunk did you say you were?) and apologizes for acting so spiteful and childish, trying to hurt her. She cries too as he sobs that he was so afraid he was going to lose everything. She insists on taking the blame for not believing him and asks him to forgive her. He barely seems capable of a nod but she gets a brief shake and the pair of them hold on to each other. This seems to be what they need after all the stress, a good cathartic cry and it looks like they're ready to make a fresh start and put the past to bed.

Diane Johnston

Stella Rigby: VIVIENNE ROSS Harry Potts: RUSSELL DIXON
Written by HARRY DUFFIN Directed by DAVID RICHARDS

Friday (3520, Friday 26 March 1993)

Breakfast time at the Duckworths... This morning's argument centers on Vera's appointment with Anne Ratcliffe, the solicitor who's looking after their compensation claim. While Jack feels the exercise is pointless, she pleads that the woman is on their side. Jack asserts that she's only doing her job and when the lawyers get their cut of the money, there won't be any compensation left! He feels especially set against both of them going as he's convinced the charge will be doubled!

Mike drops into the cafe for a bacon buttie to go. As Gail is serving him, Neil comes down from the flat to leave a used tray on his way to work. Mike demands to know what is going on and Alma explains that Neil and Angie had breakfast in bed. "Breakfast in bed!! I told you they'd turn this place into a bordello!" he blusters. Alma jokingly assures him that breakfast in bed "doesn't mean the place is becoming Sodom and Gomorrah" and he relents before asking which of them came down in their pyjamas to fetch the tray... "Neither - I brought it up", smiles Alma. "You brought it up!?" he bellows. "Had to - from what I could see, neither of them wears pyjamas!" she cracks.

As Andy and Amy stack shelves in Bettabuys, Reg looks on at a distance, smiling fondly. Curly steps up beside him and remarks that he's become more tolerant of employees being friendly during working hours. Reg admits he's been harsh in the past but says he sees no harm in it as long as they're working. Curly clues in that Maureen's presence has probably effected the change and asks how the romance is going. Reg confides that he has every hope for their future, but one detail has him puzzled - when he and Maureen go out, she never allows him to accompany her to her door. "Ah", says Curly, nodding knowingly. Reg demands to know what he's getting at and Curly ventures to suggest that Maureen is actually married. Reg scoffs at the idea but as he stalks away he snaps at Andy and Amy to "chatter less and work more"!

In the Rovers, the staff readies the pub for opening and Jack pauses to ask Bet if she knows about solicitors' rates, whether they charge a surplus for two people as taxis do. Bet doesn't think so but she isn't sure. Raquel pipes up that Jack has only to ask and Bet immediately sees the sense in this. All Jack has to do is find out how they charge *before* he goes into Miss Ratcliffe's office - then, if the charge is based on the number of clients, he can stay in the waiting room! With new confidence, he announces he'll need time off this afternoon so he can go along with Vera to the appointment.

Reg happens on Maureen as she completes "a pristine jam-stacking effort". She smiles at the compliment and readily agrees to go out with him again this evening. He asks if he can pick her up at home and to his great relief, she accepts. As he strolls away though, she calls after him that perhaps they should meet at the library instead as she has so many books to return...

In the cafe, Gail and Alma watch in bemusement as Nicky and Mark play the arcade machine. Gail says she wonders what Mark's mother must think of Nicky's influence since he has her son playing with "fruit" machines, not to mention the business of having invited him round for tea only to come in to an empty house and find beer cans strewn about the place! Alma agrees that Maggie Redman lives in a different world and wonders what she ever saw in Mike, prompting Gail to joke, "Every woman likes a bit of rough!"

The woman who wishes she'd never met this "bit of rough" now seeks him out at the garage to pick a bone with him. Angered that Mike has proposed Euro Disney to Mark, she demands to know what the hell he thinks he's doing? Mike minimizes her concern saying he merely wanted to show the boy a good time. Maggie insists he only brought the idea up because he learned that she and Ken were planning a holiday in Brittany. "That's nonsense", Mike retorts, but Maggie refuses to believe him. She's upset because Mike asked Mark without consulting her and now *she* is faced with the prospect of disappointing him.

At the solicitor's, Jack joins Vera in the waiting room just as Miss Ratcliffe comes out to greet them. He steps forward boldly to ask (over Vera's objections) how she intends to charge them. The solicitor explains that with Vera unemployed and Jack earning less than £150 a week, they will qualify for Legal Aid. Satisfied, they accompany her to the inner office to begin the consultation.

As Miss Ratcliffe explains, the compensation is double faceted... First of all, Terry as the surviving spouse, will be awarded £7,500, that much is certain. (Jack: "Flamin' Nora! What's he got to spend it on - fags?" Vera: "Awwww - he deserves it, Jack. After what he's been through, he deserves more!") In addition to Terry's award, there may be compensation for their expenses, the funeral and the cost of raising Tommy, including Vera's loss of earnings. The catch is, whatever compensation they receive will be decided based on whether the driver is convicted of careless driving. According to the two witnesses, (Des and Doug) the driver was not at fault. If the judge decides that Lisa is partly or wholly to blame for the accident, they may end up with very little.

When Bet calls time to shut the pub for tea, Councillor Harry Potts tries to get her to bend the rules by serving him another half. She flatly refuses so he charges that he asked Raquel some time ago but she must have forgot. Bet calls Raquel over to answer the complaint and she explains with assurance, "He said the sight of me pulling a pint made his knees quiver - so I thought I'd save his legs!" Having lost his appeal, Bet once again asks the councillor to remove himself from the pub.

During the cafe's afternoon rush, Neil and Martin happen in with some of Neil's belongings to be brought up to the flat. Gail gently chastises them for choosing the busiest time then catches Martin back to ask if he's been to see the college principal. To her great relief, he has and he tells her now he starts school again on Monday. As she relays the good news to Alma, Gail comments that their problems are over, "As long as Carmel stays rotting in Ireland!"

Ken calls over to see Maggie in the evening and she shares with him her perplexity over the business of Mike offering Euro Disney to Mark. She feels a holiday in Brittany simply can't compete but she doesn't want Mike to think he can disrupt their lives by making plans arbitrarily. Ken seems either to not grasp the problem or he is so blinded by his resentment of Mike that he won't entertain any alternate plans. His solution is for Maggie to simply put her foot down and tell Mark he has no choice in the matter. "Easier said than done", she points out...

In the pub, Reg and Curly are having a pint together before Reg goes to meet Maureen at the library. Curly raises an eyebrow when he learns where they are meeting but doesn't actually voice his suspicions. Reg understands his intimation though and becomes rattled when Curly meekly offers, "I guess they have it to do... Return their own library books... Single folk, I mean..." In frustration, Reg stands up to announce that it's "Take the bull by the horns time!" As he leaves the pub with his newfound determination, Mike comments to Alma that if he were stuck on the back shelf of a car, he'd make a perfect "nodding dog"! LOL

Ivy drops in on Vera to find out how the solicitor's meeting went. Frustrated that the case depends mainly on what the witnesses say, Vera unleashes her fury at Des Barnes. Ivy listens sympathetically and allows that Des may be a "bit daft" but he isn't "the devil" as Vera maintains. Much as Vera hates to accept it, he did love Lisa, she says softly. "Yeah but she weren't his to love!" retorts Vera passionately. Again, Ivy defends Des, "Yeah but Vera, he in't 'the devil', luv!" Her face tightening, Vera responds, "No? Then why is he stopping R Tommy's compensation?"

"Taking the bull by the horns", Reg waits in the darkness of Maureen's street as she emerges from her home. Hiding behind a bush, he hears her call out to someone within the house, "See you after my night course then, dear". With a smirk of disgust on his face, he watches her hurry away from the house, sans library books....

Anita Belanger

Anne Ratcliffe: SHIREEN SHAH
Written by STEPHEN MALLATRATT Directed by DAVID RICHARDS


Originally transmitted: 29 & 31 March; 2, 5, & 7 April 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 10 - Friday 14 April 2000
Episode Numbers: 3521 - 3525

Monday (3521, Monday 29 March 1993)

(I think I missed the previous episode because this seems a bit disjointed. So if I seem a bit confused about events, you'll understand!)

Mike arrives at the garage early to give Kevin a heads up on an important client he'll be hearing from. Ken approaches but hesitates when he sees Mike is there. Still, he continues and asks Kevin if he can give his car a once over before he heads off to France with Maggy and Mark. Kevin checks his book and comments about the holiday. France really isn't his thing unless it was EuroDisney as he's really just a big kid at heart, Kevin snickers. This has obviously touched a nerve because Mike gets that evil grin around his cigar and Ken shuffles his feet and looks constipated. Kevin sets a time for Thursday and Ken leaves abruptly, leaving Kevin to wonder what he said wrong? Mike just laughs and says "Who Knows! (knowing exactly what Kevin said so I assume Maggy told Ken about Mike's offer to take Mark to EuroDisney instead of Ken taking him to Brittany and I can just imagine how THAT went over with both Ken AND Mark who was told he couldn't go with his father)

Vera is worrying about the leccy bill, a final notice. She and Jack bicker about the same old thing, money, and looking after Tom. Vera blames "ThatDesBarnes" as usual. Jack reminds Vera that they may still get compensation from the insurance but as Vera says, how much will depend on how much blame the court assigns to the driver and Des has already filled out a statement exonerating the poor fellow.

Percy has got a letter from Olive Clark, the wife of an old army mate of his, Nobby Clark. We hear that Percy and Nobby were inseparable during and just after the war when they got into and out of a number of scrapes. (can't quite picture Percy as a rabble rousing young man, can you?) Seems she saw the picture of him and Phyllis in the magazine and wrote to the publication to forward it to Percy. She wanted to tell Percy that Nobby passed away a year ago which saddens our laddo greatly. They had kept in touch quite awhile after the war but we don't find out why they seem to have lost touch. Emily suggests he telephone the widow or write to her and he agrees that might be just the thing.

Reg sticks his chin out belligerently and follows it down an aisle. Maureen strides up determined to confront him about his apparent rude behaviour the night before. He barely spoke to her and she has no idea what she did or said to upset him. He says it's what she didn't say and he believes relationships should be based on truth and trust. She agrees but is baffled when he asks if there's anything she wants to tell him so he continues on his way, sadly telling Curly that he was right, there is another man in her life. Curly seems genuinely sympathetic.

Bet is in a very good mood. Stella Rigby's husband is taking her to the Caribbean which means she can't use her flat in Teneriffe (hers? Or a time share? Because why else would it be so important that someone use it now?) Anyway she offers the use of it to Bet who is excited at the thought of three weeks in the sun. She tells Betty all that has to be done is get a relief manager in from the Brewery but when she calls, they can't help because it's too short notice. (the end of next week) Betty quickly declines Bet's inquiring mind, wanting no part of that kind of responsibility. Not at her age!

Percy helps Emily in with her heavy shopping bags and tells her he called Olive who was pleased to hear from him and invited him for tea tomorrow. Phyllis pops in to see if Percy will go to the Rovers for a bite to eat with her. He treats her in his usual surly manner but when she hears about his mate and widow, she settles herself in to join them for a cup of tea to hear all about it.

Maggy drops Mark at school after a dentist appointment. A frozen mouth isn't the only reason the boy is full of silent attitude today it seems. (mind you, being driven to school in a van full of flowers can't be all that appealing to an 11 year old boy in the first place!) Ken comes to the van and is told that Mark is still peeved at not being allowed to go to EuroDisney and Maggy is starting to waver. She's afraid Mark's attitude will spoil their holiday but Ken promises they'll show Mark the best holiday ever. They can't give in to Mike or he will have Maggy where he wants to forever!

In the pub at dinnertime, Deirdre and Phyllis share the bar with Angie who is glumly and impatiently waiting for Neil who appears to have stood her up. He hasn't even managed a phone call and she's just a little irate. Bet asks Liz to be the relief manager while she's away. Liz is surprised and flattered that Bet thinks she's capable and more than a little intrigued at the possibility but needs to clear it with Jim first. (Oh Bet you don't know what you've started!)

Vera explains to the leccy people on the phone about her circumstances and has made an appointment to go see them tomorrow to discuss payment options. When she hangs up she's nearly shaking, understandably so as that's a very difficult thing to have to admit to, financial difficulty.

Emily calls Percy for a tea break and they chat a bit more about Nobby's life and career.

Jack come sin and Vera tells him about her phone call and appointment. Vera thinks they have to get Des to change his statement so the driver is more at fault and they can get more money to help raise Tommy. This isn't a usual Duckworth greed move either, it's a genuine need this time. Jack doesn't rate her chances convincing Des but does an amazing double take when he's told he has to talk to Des! It's for that little lad, his future! Well you all know how persuasive Vera can be, right?

Next we see the back room at Bettabuys where Maureen is determined to get to the bottom of this misunderstanding. Reg is angry that she's treating him like a fool, denying "his" very existence and it all comes out. He thinks she's living with another man and is very relieved to hear it isn't a man at all but puzzled as to why she wouldn't want to introduce him to her lady friend. Well, she hesitates, she knows how much he and her mother disliked each other and admits she's got her mother living with her.

Angie's waiting for Neil again but he's apparently been forgiven. He was held up on a building site with no access to a phone (you'd think a builder in this day and age, even the mid 90's would have a mobile phone!) Raquel is smug over the situation though, making it plain she doesn't believe it and witters on about Her Wayne calling her from all ends of the country. Different from a hotel room though, points out Angie sagely. Raquel brags how she called Wayne back one time and the room service girl was even there to take his calls! ('scuse me???? Oh you see where this is going don't you? So does Angie but she says nowt!) Neil arrives shortly and though Angie had told him she wasn't that upset about his lunchtime non-appearance, Raquel tells tales and busts her but it's still obvious that Neil has charmed her into forgiveness.

Des answers the door. It's Jack and Des in not inclined to let him in but Jack asks Des to hear him out for Tommy's sake and for Lisa's so Des reluctantly opens the door wider so Jack can enter.

Reg and Curly practice for the British Synchronized Pint Lifting team in a booth while Reg tells Curly about Maureen's mother, who hated the very ground he walked on and was the reason he and Maureen broke up years ago. Liz lets Jim have a pint before she tells him about her opportunity and then broaches it slowly. He is not impressed that she'll have to put in a lot of long hours as they hardly see each other now with his shift work and hers but he agrees she'd be mad to pass up the opportunity and he is rewarded with a kiss.

Des has heard jack's case but can't commit perjury and say a man is guilty when he's not. Jack points out that whatever compensation Tom gets has to last him a long time until he's grown and what he gets depends on Des. Jack angrily tells Des that if he loved Lisa he would do this for her, make sure her son had a decent future. He charges Des to think about it and leaves Des, head in hands to ponder.

Diane Johnston

Written by BARRY HILL Directed by HOWARD BAKER

Tuesday (3522, Wednesday 31 March 1993)

Early morning at the Duckworths'. Jack brings in the milk and comments to Vera that he just noticed Des behind the curtains at his house. Happen he'll change his story after all and help the Duckworths get more compensation for Tommy! In the short term, however, things are dire, and Vera announces that she's taking her beloved car to Kevin Webster to have it appraised for sale. Jack is shocked and disappointed - Vera loves that car! It's part of her, he protests. He begs her to wait for the compensation to come through but her mind's made up.

In the Rovers back room, Raquel says over breakfast that she's had a bright idea (uh-oh). She lives there right on site - why doesn't she run the Rovers while Bet's on holiday in Tenerife? Bet gently says that she's already asked Liz... it's just that the Brewery wants someone a little more... mature. Raquel is clearly disappointed but tries to cover it as she goes to get dressed. Bet's face reflects that she sees trouble ahead.

In Bettabuys, Maureen aggressively approaches Mr. Holdsworth and asks why he's been ignoring her. She'd rather know where they stand. Reg says he doesn't know where they stand after yesterday's revelation. Maureen mournfully admits that she thinks her mother is worse now than when she and Reg were first dating. Well, declares Reg, he's become "even more" mature and sensitive than he was all those years ago, too. He shall have to win her over - and he's just come up with a brain wave.

In t'Rovers Betty brings tea to Jack and Raquel for a pre-opening break. Bet's off for an appointment at the Brewery. Raquel mutters darkly that they all know what *that's* about. Betty hushes her and Jack suddenly realizes that he's the only one in the dark. In spite of Betty's efforts to keep Raquel from sticking her oar in, Raquel tells Jack that Liz has been tapped to run the place in Bet's absence. *She* lives in the pub, Raquel points out. Jack counters that *he* could've used the money. Bet snaps that *she's* been there longer than either of them! So it seems no-one's happy with Bet's choice. (Yes, but Betty turned down the job just yesterday - perhaps she was just trying to make a point to the discontented duo.)

Des approaches Kev on the street, curios as to why he's having a look under the hood of Vera's car. He says it's in preparation for her selling it. She must be desperate, he comments - she loves that car. Des is thoughtful and asks Kevin if Doug's around. On hearing that he'll be in, he says he'll catch up with him later.

Behind the bar at the Rovers, Raquel is stroppy to Liz, saying pointedly "just remember - you're not in charge yet!" Bet returns to tell Liz it's all cleared with the Brewery and is informed of Raquel's discontent. Bet tells Liz to take no notice - and that the root of the problem is Raquel's unaccepted offer to run the place herself. Just then Raquel sulks up and asks if Liz is done with the tap she was using. While she's there pulling her pint, Bet loudly tells Liz there's one condition from the Brewery - she'll have to sleep in. Raquel's face is a picture! Is that a problem? asks Bet. Not at all, says Liz. "Bit of company for you and all while I'm away," Bet whispers sweetly to Raquel as she passes by. Jack accosts her before she can reach the back and wants to know why *he* wasn't considered. Bet says they needed someone who could live in, and who could do food for nights. Jack protests that Vera could've handled the food. "With a baby to look after?" points out Bet. She goes on to say she's done Jack a favour - there'll be lots of overtime without her there. He sees her wisdom and thanks her.

Percy is having a splendid time at his tea with Olive Clark, who is a cheerful, attractive and charming woman. "Homemade bread - homemade soup - is there no end to your talents, Olive?" he beams. They are obviously highly enjoying each other's company. In fact... when Olive mentions "your Mrs. Bishop", Percy clarifies that she isn't "his" Mrs. Bishop, just his landlady. Olive also mentions that her Stanley has been gone "just over twelve months". (So he's clarified that he's single and she'd clarified that her official mourning period is over. Hmmm.) They talk a lot of Olive's late husband Stanley whom she adored and Olive speaks of how being with Percy has brought some of him back to her.

Des enters the Rovers and asks for a word with Doug - only not in here. Over at his house. Now back at Des' Doug wants to know what was so secret? Des says that Doug knows what it's like to be financially desperate, which Doug readily admits to, and asks him to keep that in mind as they talk. He asks Doug to think very hard about what he saw the night Lisa was killed. Doug says he's already told the police everything he saw. It seems that Des has been thinking, perhaps that car that knocked Lisa down *was* going pretty fast the night of the accident. If he was, and if the driver wasn't driving with due care and attention, Tommy Duckworth might be in for more compensation. Doug is gobsmacked. He says he'll pretend he didn't hear that. Des says that Tommy needs a decent future. "Let him go live in Blackpool, then," says Doug [which one can't help admitting is sensible if cold]. "You're talking perjury. You're talking conspiracy. You're talking prison," says Doug, counting off the sins on his fingers. "Not to mention the poor bloke who was drivin' the car! Sorry Des - no way." He will, however, pretend the conversation never happened.

Jack comes home to Vera and Tommy and the latest news on the financial front. The 'leccy board will accept monthly installments, Vera reports, and Kevin says her car is worth only £1,300. Jack protests that the car is worth £2,000, surely! But Vera sighs that Kev showed her the auto dealers' book. Jack gently says not to fret - he saw Des drag Doug out of the pub at lunchtime and immediately put two and two together. He also reports on the prospect of some overtime with Bet going to Tenerife. Vera briefly protests that she and Jack could've run pub but she, too, must accept the reality that they couldn't do it with Tommy. But they are hopeful as they make a little tableau, Grandma cuddling Baby with Granddad kneeling next to the chair. [My heart nearly broke for them in this scene. Jack was so supportive, Vera so low-key and reasonable.]

Bet enters the Kabin and informs Mavis and Rita that she's going to Tenerife - and Rita's coming with her! Rita is surprised but almost immediately embraces the idea. Mavis can handle the shop with Derek's help.

Doug and Kevin sit in the Websters' kitchen staring into teacups. Doug announces he has to go, thanks for the cuppa, but Kevin asks what it is he's got on his mind. He's hardly said a word and he didn't just drop by for a cup of tea! Doug tells Kevin about Des' plan [what happened to pretending the conversation never happened?]. Kevin is appropriately appalled and advises Doug to forget it ever happened. He says he'll go try to talk some sense into Des.

Derek comes into the Kabin flush with success. Today he discussed his "dossier" on Harry Potts with Headmistress Mrs. Jeffers. He'll present it to her just before the Easter break and come back after a nice restful holiday to see Potts go down! Mavis, who is not impressed with this show of vengeance, tells him not to anticipate *too* restful a break. Has she planned something? salivates Derek. A holiday perhaps? On the contrary, to Derek's disappointment they'll be running the shop for Rita. It'll be good for Derek, tuts Mavis - get his mind off revenge for a bit!

Kevin goes to see Des, who replies to Kev's protests that he can't stand by and watch Tommy suffer when it's "all my fault". What happens if he gets caught, wonders Kevin. They all get to visit Des in Strangeways? Lisa wouldn't want that. Not for a few thousand quid! That few thousand quid will make all the difference to that family, retorts Des, referring to the Duckworths. What about the family of the guy driving the car? asks Kevin. "Well, that's tough, in'it?" mutters Des. Kevin asks the man's name. Des has forgotten it - conveniently, in Kevin's opinion. Come the trial, however, he'll remember that name for the rest of his life! Then, says Des, he'll just have to live with that. He's still going ahead with it? asks a disbelieving Kev. "Yes - why don't you go back to your *wife* and your *kid* and let me make my own decisions, eh?" says Des angrily. Kevin departs.

In the Rovers, Liz breaks the news to Jim that she has to sleep in at the Rovers. He's not best pleased at this news. "You said take it!" Liz points out. "I said take it - nobody said nothing about leaving home," sulks Jim.

Des is taking his tea out of the microwave when there's a knock at the door. He doesn't recognize the young man in a suit and tie standing there, even when he identifies himself as John Hargreaves. He is, he says, the driver of the car which killed Lisa. Des asks who put him up to coming. Kevin Webster? Doug Murray? The man is confused and says he doesn't know those people. He came by to say he was sorry. It's the first time he's been back this way since the accident. He's been sitting in the car for twenty minutes trying to pluck up the courage to knock, he says. In that case, says Des, he'd better come in.

The man is shaky and tremulous as he and Des stand in the living room. Des' head is bowed. He is a salesman by trade, says Hargreaves. He couldn't face a car for a long time after the accident. "But you're all right now," says Des with a hint of sarcasm. "I have four kids under eight," says Hargreaves almost apologetically, sensing Des' anger. He had to support them. Sales is all he knows. Des offers him a drink, but he declines. He never touches it because of the job. He won't keep Des, he says, he just wanted to say how sorry he was. If there's anything at all he can do, Des is to give him a ring. He hands Des a card with his phone number on it. "If it's any consolation," he says, "part of my life has been destroyed as well... it's the baby, you see... a baby without a mother... I've a little girl about the same age..." Hargreaves is tearful. "I just wanted you to know." He walks out, leaving a shaken, pensive Des.

ronniecat

Olive Clark: JOAN SCOTT John Hargreaves: JOHN MIDDLETON
Written by KEN BLAKESON Directed by HOWARD BAKER

Wednesday (3523, Friday 2 April 1993)

In the Duckworth's living room, Vera asks Jack to hand her a nappie for the baby, and Jack takes the opportunity to grumble about the price of disposables. He suggests that Vee consider using "proper" (flannelette) diapers -- the money they'd save might allow them to keep Vera's car. Vera won't hear of it though, and tells Jack that the ad to sell the car is going in today's paper -- and that will cost another 20 quid. A frustrated Jack moans that he had more spending money when he was seven years old, but Vera reminds him again that it will just be a matter of time before they go to court and get some compensation for Lisa's death.

Across the road, Curly asks Des if he'd fancy going out that night to a new wine bar that's just opened, but Des isn't in the mood. He comes out of his kitchen with a thoughtful look on his face, and tells Curly that Hargreaves came by the night before, but the name means nothing to Curly. When Des reminds him that he's the fellow who knocked Lisa down, Curly is aghast and wonders if the guy is "thick, or what?" In Hargreave's defence, Des asserts that he's just "an ordinary bloke," full of remorse over what happened. "He only wanted to say he was sorry" Des recalls... "and he meant it." He goes on to explain that Hargreaves still blames himself, and wishes he could change what happened. "There's no way I can blame or hate him," Des summarizes, since he understands all too well how the man feels.

Vera is holding Tommy in her arms as she knocks on the Webster's door. Sally is happy to see the little fellow, but her expression changes when she learns that Vera needs her to babysit for a few hours while she runs errands in town. Sally begs off on the grounds that she has to take Rosie to the clinic, but when Vera learns that the appointent is a few hours away, she pushes the baby into Sally's arms and insists she'll be back on time. Before Sally can protest, Vera is thanking her and on her way. Sally ponders the child in her arms and says out loud that this is "the story of my life."

Bet pops into the Kabin and informs Rita that there's one detail they've overlooked in preparation for their trip to Spain. A disappointed Rita imagines they need official papers or some sort of innoculations, but her face brightens when she realizes that Bet was simply referring to a new wardrobe. In fact, Bet thinks they should both swan off into town that afternoon and begin the quest. Mavis agrees she can easily cope in the shop on her own, but wonders if it has to be that afternoon. Ah, but it does, because Vicky is bringing one of her snobby school-mates, a Ms Gabriella Lloyd-Williams, to the Rovers Return that day, and Bet wants to make a good impression.

Emily is trying to read her book when Percy comes into the living room, photos in hand. She makes it clear that he is interrupting, but agrees to look at the pictures anyway. One is of the troop ship that Percy and "Noddy" Clarke served on during the war, and the picture sends Percy into tales of their life on board. "Very interesting," sighs Emily, somewhat insincerely. Another picture shows Percy standing in front of the Sphinx, prompting Emily to note that it's a "pity" he's blocking the view! Percy decides that Olive might enjoy seeing the pictures, but he's concerned that his visit might prompt Olive to invite him to stay for his tea again, which would leave Emily to eat on her own. "I'm *quite* sure I'll survive," is Emily's predictable response.

Sally is anxious and not a little irritated when Vera finally arrives back from her errands. She protests that she's going to be late getting Rosie to the clinic, but Vera helpfully offers to run them there in her car, noting that she might as well make use of it while she can. Mindful that Vera is putting the car up for sale, Sally gently suggests that it might make more sense for Vera to return to work at Bettabuys and pay Sally to take care of Tommy -- wouldn't they be ahead a bit financially if they did things that way? -- but Vera nixes the idea on the grounds that "them 'Ortons" could use it against her if they made a move to get custody of Tommy.

Maureen and Reg pull up at the front of Maureen's house. Maureen is obviously nervous about Reg meeting her mother, but Reg is full of himself as usual, and blithely assures her that he'll have mom "eating out of his hand" in no time. They both take a deep breath and advance toward the door.

Inside, Maude is less than friendly, and without waiting for introductions, curtly asks Maureeen who *he* is that's accompanying her. Before Maureen can utter a word, Reg introduces himself as Norman Watts. Maude is in a stroppy mood because Maureen didn't warn her in advance that they would have a guest coming, and now she wants a good look at him but can't find her glasses. Reg makes for the closest easy chair, and is just about to lower himself into it when Maude cautions him to be sure not to sit on her glasses. This prompts Reg to make a pale joke that he wouldn't dare sit on her glasses... and make a "spectacle" of himself. The joke goes straight over Maude's head, but she suddenly recognizes Reg's voice and believes she's met him before. Maureen nervously ventures that she's probably seen him at Bettabuys, since that's where Reg, er, Norman works.

Emily, meanwhile, is just about to enjoy her tea when there's a knock at her door. Enter Phyllis, looking for Percy, and when she learns that he's not there, she immediately assumes that he's with "that widow." Near tears, she tells Emily that she knows how desperate widows can be, and begs her to keep her "in the know" of Percy's visits to Mrs. Clarke. Emily, in exasperation, tells Phyllis that she'd really like to have her tea before it gets cold, and, NO, she won't spy on Percy.

Speaking of the gentleman, he's just now finishing his tea, and once again compliments Olive on her cooking skills. He reminisces how Noddy was known for his sweet tooth and how the cooks used to say "hide the sugar" whenever he appeared. He also recalls how strong Noddy's voice was, causing Olive to laugh in agreement. Moving the relationship up a notch, he asks Olive to call him Percy, instead of Mr. Sugden, to which she agrees.

Back at the Duckworths', Jack cuddles a sleepy Tommy while Vera answers the telephone. After a few harsh words, wherein Vera is clearly insulted by a low offer on her car, she hangs up and informs Jack that the caller had the nerve to offer only £800. Jack assures her that that's only what folk do when they're bargaining for a used car, and he warns her to start being a little more civil in her negotiations or she'll discourage people before they even make an offer.

While Maureen makes tea in the kitchen, Reg waxes eloquent on the challenges and rewards of being in management, but Maude is obviously not the least bit interested, isn't listening, and is still looking for her missing glasses. Just as Maureen re-appears with the tea tray, Maude locates them amid papers on her desk. They're on for only a few seconds when the penny drops and Maude exclaims "it's *HIM*... what's-his-name... REG HOLDSWORTH!" Maureeen attempts an explanation, but Maude holds the floor. "I thought I smelled a rat," she says contemptuously, and then wonders why he changed his name -- "are the police after him?" Maureen tries again to explain, but Maude blurts out that she wouldn't give Reg "the steam off [her] tea -- a pillock is always a pillock!"

At the Rovers Return, Mike orders a drink and wonders why Steve is propping up the bar on a Friday night when he ought to be out pulling birds. Ken pops in, and seeing Emily sitting alone at a table, asks her if she'd pass on a book he borrowed from Deirdre. He explains that he'll be away on holiday in France, and when Mike overhears this, he sarcastically reminds Ken to drive on the "right" side of the road. Ken ignores the crack and leaves, passing Vicky and her friend Gabriella who are just coming into the pub. Bet happily hugs and kisses Vicky, introductions are made, and everyone retreats to the back rooms.

Bet asks "Gabby" if she's been north before, to which the response is negative. She informs Bet that her parents are in "Honkers" (her dad is in banking), and it takes a moment for Bet to realize that Gabby is referring to Hong Kong. Bet does a little one-upping in her own inimitable style when she remarks that they've got better than Hong Kong right there in Weatherfield, with a Chinese take-away just around the corner. When Steve comes in, Bet offers to give Gabby a tour of the place so that Vicky can have a few moments alone with him.

After Bet and Gabby leave, Vicky asks Steve if he's missed her, and he grumpily informs her that he had plans to take her out that evening. Now he wonders what they'll do with Gabby in the picture. Vicky assures him she'll come up with something as they kiss.

On the other side of the wall, Des gloomily tells Curly that he ought to go on alone to the wine bar, since he's not fit company, but Curly declines because his idea was "just a thought." Angie bursts in, alone, causing Curly to crack on about Neil's whereabouts. While Angie informs him that Neil is out with mates, Jack offers Des another pint before asking if he's given any more thought to the upcoming court case. Des glowers at him and responds that he's had all he wants before leaving.

At the dinner table, Maude declares that she's lost her appetite -- "and it's not the food, it's the company." Reg tries to reason with her, explaining that all he and Maureen want is a little bit of understanding. "I look back over all these years," Reg says quietly, "and as the poet tells us, "...the saddest words of tongue and pen are.. what might have been." Here we are, in the fulness of time, granted a second chance at happiness, and all we ask is a little bit of tolerance." Maude won't be swayed, though, telling Reg that she speaks as she finds -- "if Maureen wants to make a fool of herself, it's her lookout." She then insists that she'd rather eat a sandwich in the kitchen, and as Reg jumps up to hold the door open for her, she rolls her wheelchair over his foot. Reg lets out a whoop of pain as Maureen anxiously wonders if he's alright. Typically, Maude doesn't stop, apologize, or even acknowledge what she's done, giving us all to conclude that she did it on purpose.

After another blast of ads, we find Maureen weeping that she just can't deal with her mother's disapproval. As Reg tries unsuccessfully to comfort her, she tells him that she knows Maude will "snipe, whinge... and run Reg down" at every opportunity. "I can't face it," she sobs, and she thinks it would be best if she gave her notice at Bettabuys and "called it quits" with Reg.

Vera answers the door and finds Des standing outside. He wants to talk about the court case, so Vera invites him in. Des takes a moment to fuss over Tommy, but Vera is her usual uncompromising self, and demands to know what he wants. He somewhat sheepishly tells her that he can't lie once he's in the witness box -- he has to tell the truth. Vera retorts that "the truth" is that Tommy would still have a mother, were it not for him. "He's the one that matters, not your conscience," Vera shrieks at Des. "Don't forget that!"

Heather Morlan

Maude Grimes: ELIZABETH BRADLEY Gabriella Lloyd-Williams: ERICA SAILS Olive Clarke: JOAN SCOTT
Written by JOHN STEVENSON Directed by HOWARD BAKER

Thursday (3524, Monday 5 April 1993)

Vera has Jack making a "for sale" sign for the car window and is giving him instructions on what to wear for the court hearing this afternoon - "that tie you got for our wedding unless you've got beer all over it!" (35+ year old tie and he's still got it!?) Jack chafes at having to attend but Vera plays the guilt button well, talking about the murderer of this poor motherless child. When Jack tries to express a bit of sympathy for the driver, he only gets more ear bashing, sarcasm and blame casting at Des Barnes. Never mind walking around with a broken bloomin' 'eart. More of the same, how to pay the bills and "Oh Jack we'll cope"

Phyllis has produced a heart attack on a plate (sausage, ham, beans, eggs) for Des but he really can't stomach it. Curly arrives to wish him good luck. Des grimly describes what it's going to be like, reliving every minute of that horrible night, every minute that he still replays in his mind over and over like a video tape in slow motion. He can't seem to stop it, he says, haunted.

Steve has come by with two tickets to a concert but whinges when Vicky insists that Gaby must come with them. Of course she'd like to spend time alone with him but can't leave her friend on her own. She persuades Steve to get two more tickets and get Andy to double date.

Reg calls Maureen to see if he can't persuade her to change her mind and continue seeing him. She tearfully sobs that she can't do it to him, her mother will never change and will try to turn her against Reg. She's just miserable and even Reg wipes a tear from under his spectacles when she says good bye.

Emily has found her old walking boots in the loft and is industriously polishing them, much to Percy's amazement. Even stranger, he discovers that she isn't planning to sell them, she's planning to wear them! She wistfully recalls the days when she and Ernest used to go hiking and has thought she might join a local walking club. Percy's friendship with Mrs. Clark has made Emily open her eyes and realize her life has sank into a boring little rut and she plans to remedy that by finding some new interests and making new friends, broaden her horizons as it were. Percy actually seems to approve with an admiring glance.

Andy is beavering away, clearing up some spilled pickled onions when Amy happens by. I find this woman's accent terribly hard to decipher at times but the gist of it seemed to be an invitation out somewhere this evening. Reg cavorts along just then and takes his bad mood out on the pair of them for socializing during working hours. When Curly passes on a message to Andy to call his brother, Reg won't even allow that. Curly claps Andy on the shoulder. Sorry Mate! Reg had been wittering on about "Quod Erat Demonstratum" and Amy asked Andy what that "Quod" thingy meantÖ. Andy's translation "Reg Holdsworth is a prat!".

Emily notices the sign in Vera's car window. Just then Kevin is arriving home for his dinner so Emily calls to him and asks him if the car is worth the asking price. Kevin says it is and has already checked it over. He is quite surprised to hear that Emily just might buy it. Amused, Emily assures him she does have a license though hasn't driven in years and is capable of more than a rocking chair and knitting needles.

In the pub, Curly has dragged Reg out for lunch, meaning to help Reg if he can. She's bottled you, hasn't he? Reg testily wishes Norman had a more elegant turn of phrase but the fact remains. Curly offers advice but Reg hesitates to think Curly , with his sorry romantic track record is hardly the one to give it. (Sorry track record? Talk about pots and kettles!) Precisely the one, Curly insists, Reg could learn from his mistakes. He calls Reg a wimp for seeming to give up on the love of his life just because of a little old lady in a wheelchair. Little old lady? Reg squeals, "Maud's not a mother, she's more like a medusa on wheels!" Still, Reg seems to have renewed determination after Curly's urging him not to give up so easily, not without putting up a good fight at least. Reg wags his head in agreement, somewhat decisively.

Vera and jack are nearly ready to go to court when Emily arrives. Vera's a bit stroppy, assuming Emily is there to pass on a complaint from Percy. Emily realizes she's come at a bad time but when Vera realizes Emily wants to buy the car, Vera brightens up and is all charm... "I presume we are talking cash?"

Steve pops through just long enough to see Vicky to let her know that it's all fixed up for tonight, having persuaded Andy away from his date with Amy. Now Vicky must tell Gaby which she does, using a bit of flattery to talk her round, saying that Andy has seen the girl from his window and is smitten. This combined with the fact that Andy is older and in university, sways Gaby into accepting the blind date. Later, when the boys come to pick up the girls, Andy nearly throttles Steve when he finds out he's supposed to be smitten. Awkward introductions are made with a bit of small talk and the foursome is away for the night.

Percy is baffled when Emily says she might drive to Derbyshire to visit Hilda Ogden on the Easter weekend, seriously concerned that she might be having one of her "episodes" again. Especially when she announces she's bought Vera's car and signed up for refresher driving lessons! Emily is very pleased with herself, proclaiming she's never felt better! (Well she would, seeing as she's about to have a storyline!)

Vera and Jack arrive back at Sally's to collect Tommy after the court. Vera bitterly cries that the blackguard got off not guilty and it's all because of Des and Doug's testimony. She doesn't know yet what the amount of compensation will be but it won't be as much as they hoped, she figures. She takes Tommy and her anger, disappointment and worry home with her, leaving Sally and Kevin to shake their head in sympathy.

Phyllis is waiting for Des upon his return. Kevin comes across so Phyllis learns from him that the driver was not guilty. Kevin wanted to check on Des who is racked with guilt himself, feeling like he's stabbed Vera and Jack in the back. Sticking to his principles doesn't feel very good right about now.

Reg stands in the dark outside Maureen's house gathering his courage and then rings the bell. Maureen peeks out and is delighted to hear that Reg, a man of steel honed on the handle of life, (*snort*!) isn't going to give up so easily and plans to mount a campaign to win Maud over to his side. From inside the house we hear Maud abrasively calling out to Maureen to find out who she's talking to and we hear the grinding of the motor and wheels of her chair coming closer and closer like the beat of the soundtrack to Jaws! Reg declines to come in tonight, predicting Maud will soon be putty in his hands.

Curly and Kevin are plying Des with pints in the Rovers and trying to convince him to put it all behind him. Would he have felt better had he lied and put that poor driver in jail? Course not. Listening to Des feel sorry for himself, Bet decides to stick her nose in. She tells Des a few home truths - that Tommy might not have much but is no worse off than a lot of kids and he's a normal, happy and healthy baby, no worse off than some others. He's got more than some have when you see on telly and in the newspapers the misery some children in Bosnia or Somalia live in. Stop crucifying himself for doing the right thing!

Over in a booth, Rita, Mavis and Deirdre are toasting Emily's new lease on life. Mavis thinks Emily should name her new car, maybe Norman Nova and of course Rita teases Mavis for her terminal case of "twee" for which the chemist has provided tablets but they donít seem to be doing any good. But the four toast to Norma Nova anyway in the end, pleased for Emily's good fortune.

Outside, Vera is cleaning her things out of the car and looking like she's barely holding it together. Out of the pub come Kevin, Des and Curly and what Bet said must have done the trick because Des has a mile on his face for the first time since Lisa died. But the disappointment and anger is too much for Vera and she explodes out of the car and launches herself verbally and physically at Des, how can he possibly find anything to laugh about when her world has come crashing down! Jack pulls her off and drags her inside while Des is left, shocked, speechless and breathless, on the pavement.

Diane Johnston

Gabriella Lloyd-Williams ERICA SAIL
Written by ADELE ROSE Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Friday (3525, Wednesday 7 April 1993)

Happy Birthday Mavis! The birthday girl is beaming with anticipation for what the day has in store, even as she collects the milk off the front step.

In the Kabin, Derek is grinning conspiratorially as he confides in Rita the birthday surprise he has in mind for his lucky wife. He thought about hot air ballooning, but gave up the idea as he didn't know how Mavis handles heights. Then, he considered taking her to the honeymoon suite of a lovely country inn... Rita swoons with delight - that's *her* idea of a lovely time! Nevertheless, Derek decided the cost was prohibitive, so... (drumroll) He is taking Mavis to the Smiling Sprout! "A musical?" asks Rita. No, he explains - the Smiling Sprout is Mavis' favourite vegetarian restaurant! "They do a terrific cauliflower bake *and* they don't have a drinks' license so it's very reasonably priced!" Rita withers Derek with a sarcastic remark about his sense of romance but he counters that "any fool can provide thrills". In a wounded tone, he goes on, "When Mavis bit into the croustade, she said it was a taste of 'heaven' - *that* is what I'm aiming for - *heaven*!"

Mavis comes in to report for work and Derek and Rita drop the subject. Derek goes off to work after planting a light kiss on Mavis' cheek and Rita pulls out a gift box from behind the counter and presents it to her assistant. As Mavis opens the package she smiles with anticipation and asks Rita if she knows what Derek has up his sleeve. "I believe he intends to take you to heaven", Rita replies flatly.

Vera is feeling harassed this morning with all she has to do. Between her shopping and a stop at the Citizens' Advice Bureau, she just doesn't know how she'll manage on the bus with young Tommy. So she stops by Sally's place to ask if she minds keeping him for a little while. Sally squirms as she tries to be diplomatic, impressing on Vera that she doesn't mind looking after the baby but she does run a child-minding business. So much for diplomacy, Vera doesn't get the hint at all. With expressions of gratitude, she goes off promising to hurry but with an added request in case she's late - could Sally please give him his dinner?

On the street, Emily and Percy are busily polishing up the car Emily has just purchased from Vera. Percy gripes about the state it's in but Emily thinks there's nothing wrong with it that a bit of elbow grease can't fix. Vera happens on them and starts waxing reminiscent about her prized car. Percy retorts that there's no point in getting sentimental - "You've traded it for a wad of cash!" They get into a dispute when he charges that it's "as dirty as a farm truck". Vera indignantly answers that her car was clean enough to eat out of - "We 'ad our chips in that car - many's the time!" As Vera stalks away in anger, Emily turns to chastise Percy, "Mr. Sugden, I have spent a lot of money on this car without adding a neighbourhood dispute into the equation!"

Bet is rushing around making last minute preparations for her trip to Tenerife. Liz follows close behind her as she calls out instructions while Steve and Vicky sit on the stairway vying for a last few minutes together before she has to leave for Southampton. Liz stops to remind her son that he has a job to get to but Steve takes no heed, whining to Vicky instead about Gabby's presence precluding any time alone for them. Betty happens by and offers that if Vicky had spent the first week of her holidays in Southampton she would then have been able to spend the second week here with Steve while Bet is away! (Nice one, Betty, contribute to the delinquency of minors, why don't you?)

In the corridors of Bettabuys, Curly is none too pleased to hear Reg announce that he'll be away for lunch, a "business lunch", he calls it, addressing "staff relations". Before Curly can answer, Reg tells him that his meeting is *not* with Maureen as he might suppose but with someone from head office, "Dermott Bingham". Satisfied, Curly goes off to resume his duties. He comes upon Maureen who proudly shows off the display she's just finished. Curly compliments her work and unwittingly asks if she could possibly postpone her lunch hour to help out with some extra deliveries coming in. To his astonishment, she blushes that she can't today, she has a lunch date with Mr. Holdsworth at Casey's Wine Bar...

In the Rovers, Mavis congratulates Emily on her new car, but being Mavis, she doesn't leave it at that. She informs Emily that Derek didn't think her purchase of the car was "ecologically responsible" but never mind, *she* thinks it's "wonderful". Bet pops out from the back to announce the taxi's arrival and asks Mavis to run across and see if Rita's ready. As she waits, she takes a minute to say goodbye to everyone, and especially to Vicky. "Now, don't forget what you're to say to Alec..." she starts. "I know", Vicky smiles, "Bet sends her love..." Shaking her head, Bet interrupts, "No, luv - 'Bet sends her best and wishes him well' - AND she's having a helluva time in Tenerifeh!" Rita comes in to announce that her bags are loaded aboard the cab and they are off!

As Jim is finishing his shift, he stops in at Bettabuys to pick up the takings for deposit. On his way out of the store, he reminds Andy that as they're on their own for tea tonight, he should pick up some burgers on his way home. As he continues on his way out, two gunmen enter the store in a frenzy. As one stays near the front entrance, the other leaps onto a counter and shouts instructions for everyone to keep still. Jim drops to the floor and shouts back for the gunmen to remain calm. The first robber lunges forth to snatch the case full of money and steps away to retreat. When he turns his back, Andy runs forward to try for a tackle. But the thug reels and knocks him down using the butt of his rifle on Andy's face. As Andy falls to the floor, the robbers make their escape and Jim is left to cradle his wounded son.

In the aftermath of the trauma there is shocked silence. As they await the police and ambulance, Reg and Maureen return from their "business lunch". Stopping at the door to engage in a little charade - "What a coincidence - our returning at exactly the same time!" - they are oblivious to the scene within. Stepping inside, Reg surveys the situation with horror. As he is briefed about the robbery by Curly, he can only repeat in stunned disbelief, "This is terrible, this is -- terrible!"

As Reg moans about the loss of the money, Curly sharply reminds him that the important thing is that Andy was hurt! "Well where are the ambulance and police?" Reg stammers helplessly. Curly makes no bones about telling Reg off for his absence when the crisis occurred. He asserts that head office will be interested to know that the manager was at Casey's Wine Bar with "Mrs. Maureen Dermott Bingham Naylor" while his store and staff were under attack. Reg protests that head office must get no such report! Finally the shrill siren of the ambulance can be heard in the distance. Jim instructs Reg that he'll be going to hospital with Andy so he can inform the police when they arrive.

Sally has now had Tommy most of the day. When Kevin comes in from the garage he exhorts her to tell Vera straight - if she wants a child-minder, she'll have to pay for the service. Thanking him sarcastically for his "helpfulness" Sally mentions something else on her mind, an invitation from Des for her to bring the kiddies over to make use of his back garden. Kevin makes a sick joke about Des being sweet on Sal but she scoffs at the notion, saying she only told him because the idea spooked her. Vera finally arrives to collect Tommy, blustering with apologies and excuses. As Sally struggles to get a word in edgewise, Vera offers her the princely sum of £1 for her trouble. Finally Sally lays it on the line in the nicest possible way, but Vera takes it amiss and huffs off angrily, "If neighbours can't help each other...!"

Derek and Mavis are having a drink in the pub before they go off to Mavis' birthday dinner at the Happy Cabbage. Harry Potts comes in and Derek mutters that they'd better get going before "that man" can "spoil" their evening. Mavis offers that all they need to do is tell him they have plans. But no sooner has she spoken than Potts joins them at their table, offering birthday greetings "to Mazy" and a bottle of sparkly wine.

Upstairs at the McDonalds' Andy is now resting comfortably in bed with his bruised face to remind him of this afternoon's encounter. Steve opens the door and timidly enters to offer his support, telling Andy he did a brave thing. The brothers bond for a moment before one of them mentions that Jim is taking things hard. He feels terribly inadequate because of what happened to Andy during the robbery. Andy thinks as long as he stays in his present job, their father risks an early and short retirement. He suggests that if Jim were to get an education he might be inclined to change directions. Steve agrees but realistically he doesn't see Jim going for it.

Derek and Mavis have finally arrived for her birthday dinner at the Cheerful Turnip. Unfortunately, Derek can't seem to relax and enjoy the evening, miffed as he is about Harry Potts holding them up. Mavis does her best to get him to drop it but Derek continues his rant. Finally, Mavis soothingly remarks that Potts was at least "entertaining". "Entertaining? The man was unctuous, smarmy and repellant!" shrieks Derek. He takes special exception to Potts' "transparent" references to Mavis' age being just 21. "Anyone would be have to be totally gaga to think you're a day under 50!" he snorts. Opening his menu, Derek finally thinks to ask what she'd like to have. Snapping hers shut, Mavis replies coolly, "Soup". When he protests that she must have something more, she sniffs, "It's my birthday and I can have anything I want. Soup is what I want - anything else would be too difficult to chew at MY age!"

Jim has had a few drinks by now. Whisky in hand, he wanders up to Andy's sickbed to have a post post-mortem about the events of the day. Andy acknowledges that interfering with the gunman was foolhardy but Jim tells him he wasn't to know - it's how any young man would have reacted. He tells his son that he's learned at his age to stay calm in such a situation - he may not exemplify a hero but at least he's still alive. "All the mistakes in this world are made by young men - I firmly believe that... Or old men acting like young men...." Andy can see his father is kicking himself but doesn't quite know how to ease his guilt. He offers that he's learned something today but Jim cuts him off. "I have too - but I won't tell you what it is..."

Anita Belanger

Gabriella Lloyd Williams: ERICA SAIL Armed Robbers: ANDY BRADFORD and JOSH MORAN
Written by STEPHEN MALLATRATT Directed by BRIAN MILLS


Originally transmitted: 9, 12, 14, 16 & 19 April 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 17 - Friday 21 April 2000
Episode Numbers: 3526 - 3530

Monday (3526, Friday 9 April 1993)

Emily admires her new car on her way to the Kabin where Reg is browsing cards for an "Oil on troubled waters card" for Maud. Derek heads out to the DIY shop and promises to meet Mavis for a hot put in the Rovers at dinner. Jim stops in too for a newspaper but when Reg makes a few sly remarks about Jim losing the money to the robbers, Jim defends his actions and is glad Andy is in one piece. Reg keeps pushing though, disdainfully pointing out that at least Andy had a go since somebody had to (meaning of course, that Jim did not). Reg bangs on about handing out medals while admitting he's no hero, himself. (Too right, this is a man that would have wet his drawers confronted with the same situation!) All this touches a nerve with Emily who calls Reg on the carpet for his attitude. She makes a speech about dead heroes who only have their medals to pass on to their loved ones who would rather have the person back. She commends Jim for his actions while condemning Reg for his attitudes and stalks out, the violent death of her own husband at the hands of robbers now fresh in her mind after many years. Reg admits, somewhat uncomfortably, that yes he did hear something about Emily's husband, now Mavis mentions it, and even looks somewhat embarrassed when Jim turns around and exits the shop in disgust too. Mavis probably would do the same if she could but settles for a glare dripping with contempt.

Vera wants Jack to go to the prison with her but Jack still put off that he wasn't put in charge of the Rovers, is determined not to ask Liz for any favours and implies he's indispensable anyway. Jack suggests Vera take Tommy to cheer Terry and reminds her to get Terry to fill in the forms so that they will get a bit of an income from the compensation. (The compensation would go to Terry as Lisa's next of kin but he being in prison could sign the income to Tommy's caretakers I suppose. Which brings me to another thing, we last saw that the hearing took place but they didn't know how much they'd be getting. Later in this episode a figure of £5,000 is mentioned so that must have been decided off camera)

Harry Potts stops in to the Kabin. I think Harry is conducting a PR campaign trying to get on Mavis' good side. Either that or he fancies her which isn't beyond the realm of possibility given the number of men Mavis seems to inexplicably find falling at her feet. He compliments Derek as having made a success of the caretaker job when he wasn't expected to. Then he goes off on a tangent about his own National Service days when he was a stalwart and fearless participant in the Royal Navy. (I don't know what the point of this is unless it's to make himself look good in Mavis' eyes. Personally I think he's been using too much of that red hair dye!) Mavis mentions the dodgey sink in the back room, sink which is why Derek was at the DIY shop purchasing a spanner so Harry offers to have a look at it as he has a spanner in his car as it happens.

Sally and Kevin chat with Des about Vera. Sally wants Des to go and make peace with her, it being Good Friday and poor Vera has enough on her plate without expending all that extra energy hating Des.

Percy has brought Mrs. Clark to meet Mrs. Bishop and is providing the dinner himself. (I guess Emily wasn't quite brave enough to take that motor trip to Derby to visit Hilda as she had suggested to Percy the other day) Emily is as always, gracious to her visitor.

Inside the Rovers, Betty is serving up hot pots to Mavis and Derek. Derek as you might imagine, has a big sulk on him because he's bought a spanner needlessly and his enemy Harry Potts has helpfully fixed the sink behind his back. Derek takes umbrage at Mavis' seeming change of heart about Harry (remember back to Mavis' birthday when Harry delayed them at the Rovers and later Mavis was chattering about how amusing Harry's stories were and now she's singing his praises for his, what was the expression? Oh, yes, "Affable helpfulness". Yep I do believe Harry's got an agenda.) Derek whinges and moans while Mavis naively speaks well of Harry only to be accused of having bad judgement of men, mentioning Victor Pendelbury's name as case in point. Mavis has had enough of Derek's childish attitude and snarkily agrees, maybe he's right, maybe she's *not* a good judge. She *used* to think *he* was intelligent and smart in his cavalry twills! Point, game and set to Mavis I think.

Percy, Olive and Emily have had a lovely dinner and Percy is now suggesting the three of them take a drive but Emily is suddenly a bit apprehensive of driving so far out into the country on her first time out. She would feel more comfortable waiting until she's had her refresher driving lessons but no matter how much she protests, Percy keeps bullying and persuading until she looks overwhelmed.

Vera runs into the pub with Tommy on one hip to get taxi money from Jack as she's missed her bus. Jack is skint and won't hand any over so she leaves in disgust, believing he's just being mean with his money. Jack more or less does give that impression to Liz who takes a fiver out of her own purse and gives it to Jack but has to nag him out the door when it looks as if he's going to keep it for himself! When he runs outside to catch Vera, she's nowhere to be seen near the bus stop. He turns around and spies Vera driving off from around the corner (where Emily had to park as there were no spots on the street proper) in her, now Emily's Car!!!

Maureen and Maud are sitting in the house talking about Reg with Maud of course having nothing good to say much to Maureen's consternation. Maud hears Reg's car pull up outside and recognizes the sound of the motor, "very distinctive, a sort of 'busybody burping'" she describes it. Maureen is disgusted that her mother could even be negative about Reg's car and says it probably isn't him anyway, she's succeeded again at driving him away.

A Police Constable is seen leaving Jim's house, having gone to record a few more details about the robbery no doubt. Just as he's getting into his car, Percy runs down with Emily close behind to report her car stolen!

But it *was* Reg's car and he bounds into the sitting room with a triumphant "Ta DA!" holding a giant sized chocolate Easter egg in a basket under one arm for Maud who conveniently comes over all Chapel and says she couldn't possibly accept chocolate for a pleasure on Good Friday and wheels herself out of the room and on to her high horse.

Black and blue faced Andy is listening to his father in the pub trying to defend his actions during the robbery. Jim's voice takes on an edge of desperation, pleading for his son to understand that he wasn't close enough to intervene, feeling horribly guilty that his son took a beating when it should have been him. It sounds like it is tearing Jim apart even though Andy certainly does not hold it against his father. Or so he says.

As a police car drives around the corner, Vera drives back onto the street. (I guess it could have been the same constable if the car wasn't reported stolen for some time after Vera had taken it. She couldn't possibly have got to the prison and back if she had taken it shortly before it was reported) Anyway, she finds a parking spot right in front of Emily's and gets out of the car. But a constable on foot notices her and approaches. (word gets around fast!) As she gets Tommy out of the back of the car, she lies to the constable and says that she still owns the car although it's in the process of being sold to the lady who reported it missing who was obviously just confused. This will be cleared up shortly as the constable rings Emily's doorbell.

Meanwhile, back at Maureen's, Reg is feeling defeated, not knowing that Maud was "strong Chapel" (probably only when it's convenient) Maureen insists they can't go out and leave her mother alone today and she actually defends her mother, proving that blood is thicker than water or lust, saying that her mother is just afraid that Reg will take her way from her mother which of course he doesn't want to do. Reg corrects her and advises her not to perjure herself because that's exactly what he wants to do! They gaze into each other's eyes. Oh Reg! Oh Maureen! They are overcome by lust and the Easter basket gets tossed behind the chair as the two of them fall back on the couch in a clinch.

Jim calls in to work to see if there's any extra shifts to be had. He needs to get back to work, he tells the dispatcher.

Emily covers for Vera and Vera manages to thoroughly flummox the constable with her fancy footwork who ends up requesting their documents to be presented at the station and then goes off muttering about wasting police time and manpower.

Jim helps Liz lock up for the afternoon closing before heading out to work, having managed to swap a shift with someone. He's curt and short tempered which concerns Liz. Betty thinks Liz is just worried about his safety but it's actually his emotional state she's concerned about. Jim is the kind of person that cannot bear to think of himself as a coward and is starting to doubt himself after the robbery when he let his son get hurt. Betty thinks the shock will soon wear off. Liz hopes nobody crosses him before it does, knowing he'll go off the deep end.

Jack and Vera are in a screaming match that will probably make your ears bleed to hear it. He's angry that she took Emily's car and she's angry that he saw her do it and didn't let Emily know for her. She wails about them wanting her documents which of course she doesn't have, having cancelled the tax and insurance. What documents, Jack fires off, A Certificate of insanity??? She's going to get done for being clueless because she's already applied for the insurance refund "Ya great toasted bun!" LOL! He spins around to answer the door and who's there but a sheepish looking Des. You do pick your moments, Lad, when Jack hears that Des wants a word with Vera. Vera is stroppy but Des insists on having his say. He admires her, that's one, because she stands up for herself in spite of her troubles. The mood she's already in , she argues him every step of the way, braying at full Vera decibel level. Des pushes her, even offers brass poker or something to hit him with. He admits he's been stupid but he loved Lisa and now all he has left is this business between him and Vera who begins to crumble and break down, the pressure and grief overcoming her.

Unexpectedly, Mike Baldwin appears on our screen. I'm thinking this is an obligatory contractual appearance but no, there is actually a point to the scene as he gets in his car with Alma, after observing Ken Barlow unloading his car over by the door to his flat. Curious, he mentions to Alma that Ken, Maggy and Mark were supposed to be in France for two weeks but it's barely been a week and they're back. He calls Maggy on the mobile and hangs up when he hears her voice. Curiouser and curiouser. Alma thinks it's none of his business but he's got a cheshire cat's grin on his face and wonders if it might be the end of a beautiful friendship (Maggy and Ken not Mike and Ken LOL!)

Back to number 9 where Jack has just seen Des out the door. Have they made up? Probably, we are to assume. Jack asks Vera if Terry signed the papers and it's here that we find out that the compensation was 5000 quid. He nearly loses his mind when Vera says that Terry was advised not to accept it and hold out for more for his son and she's fully supporting his decision. Poor Jack, I think I can date the beginning of his heart troubles to right here, amidst the bills and financial hardship. He picks up that brass poker thingy as if he would like to cave her head in with it!

Diane Johnston

Harry Potts: RUSSELL DIXON Olive Clark: JOAN SCOTT PC Robbins: TONY TURNER
Written by JULIAN ROACH Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Tuesday (3527, Monday 12 April 1993)

It's officially Easter Monday, a Bank Holiday on the Street, but unofficially it's Spoilt Little Boy Day on the Street.

Angie and Neil exchange a choccie egg and chicken (which came first?) but their pleasant breakfast is interrupted by a phone call from Ali. He needs Angie to come in to work and she grudgingly agrees. Spoilt Little Boy 1 Neil is annoyed.

Deirdre and Audrey wait on Emily in the shop. Emily says she's not taking her car for a holiday outing because she's still too unsure of herself, especially in holiday traffic. Deirdre convinces her to drive them somewhere for lunch anyway. Spoilt Little Boy 2 Ken comes in and barely speaks - when asked how Brittany was he replies shortly, "wet".

Mark arrives at Mike and Alma's where Mike gives him an Easter gift - a GameBoy portable video game. Mark's thrilled and says to Mike's delight that it's too bad he didn't have it "stuck in the back of that car all day long". He goes on to say the trip to Brittany with Ken and Maggie was "as interesting as a school trip".

In the Rover's Liz plunks a huge garish pink Easter basket on the breakfast table between Raqual and Betty. (Wonderful throwaway moment: Raquel, thinking it's Liz' Easter gift to her and Betty, says "Oh, we didn't get yer anything, did we, Betty?" "Oh, I did. Give it to Liz this mornin'." Bet replies matter-of-factly, oblivious to Raquel's glare.) Yes, it's the same one we saw Reg unsuccessfully try to give Maude yesterday, but all Liz knows is that Curly donated it. They agree to raffle it with proceeds going to a good cause. Spoilt Little Boy 3 Jim arrives from his night shift in a foul mood which isn't improved when Raquel makes some unhelpful comments about the robbery. He stalks off to make himself a pot of tea after finding none in the pot.

Mike's working at becoming a Pokemon Master, or whatever the 1993 GameBoy equivalent was. Mark goes to wash his hands before lunch and Mike gloats to Alma that Mark doesn't want to talk about his holiday, therefore he must've had a miserable time.

Deirdre and Emily prepare to leave for their drive and lunch date. Steve points out that the car's tags have expired and Emily replies something about that being taken care of so they're off. Steve is distracted anyway by the unexpected appearance of Vickie; he seems very glad to see her.

In the Rovers, Denise and Audrey have a drink while Raquel hovers by their table wittering on about "my Wayne". Spoilt Little Boy 1 comes in looking for Kev or Des or anyone, but it's a family day for Kev and a big racing day which means Des is working. Liz tries to get Neil to buy a raffle ticket on the basket for Angie but he sulks "what - and undermine the independence of a working woman?". Steve brings Vickie by and she explains that by some plot contrivance or other she had noplace else to stay but the Rovers. Liz smiles hesitantly and reminds Vickie that Bet's away. "No problem," says Vickie breezily, leaving Liz little choice but to agree. She sends Vickie through to the back but tells her to be quiet as Jim's asleep upstairs. Vickie frowns at this (why?) and when she and Steve go through to the back they find Spoilt Little Boy 3 not upstairs but on the sofa asleep. They wake him accidentally and he drily tells Vickie she can tell Bet Liz has taken to pub management "like a duck to water". Vickie frowns again (what *is* wrong with this child today?) and says with more than a hint of sarcasm, "Ah. She _will_ be pleased." She makes sympathetic noises about the robbery, to which Spoilt Little Boy 3 growls a reply and heads upstairs.

Spoilt Little Boy 2 is in full whinging mode now as he watches Maggie chop veggies in her kitchen. A holiday is something you're supposed to talk about for months, he moans. Is he never to mention it again? And as soon as they got home Mark ran to his father's, he whines. Maggie says maybe they were hoping for too much. Ken petulantly says he's leaving before Mark gets back and adds that perhaps Maggie will call him "when it suits you - and Mark". Maggie agrees he should go, adding that "I'm sick of it ending on this note every time we see each other". Fine, pouts Ken - he'll wait to hear from her.

In Angie and Neil's apartment, Spoilt Little Boy 1 sulks, changes tv channels restlessly and looks at his watch. (How someone like Angie could be interested in a man who is so dull he can't amuse himself for a single day is beyond me.)

In the Rovers, Deirdre and Emily are back from their road trip. Emily's gained confidence. They have a drink with Ivy who recounts taking Nick and Sarah Lou to Easter Mass and wasn't Sarah Lou adorable, even lighting a candle for her mother after the service (!).

Reg and Maureen are also in the Rovers and are sold tickets on the unseen raffle prize by Raquel (uh-oh). When Reg finds out the proceeds go to the Wetherfield Old Folks' Home he offers to take a dozen as he's all in favour of giving seniors somewhere (else) to go! (LOL) However he claims he's been caught short so only Maureen buys one. Liz rings the bell to announce the draw and asks Jim to do the honours. Spoilt Little Boy 3 slinks up to the bar and draws number 74. Nobody seems to have the winner until Steve realizes it's the number of Jim's own ticket, which he'd left on the table. Jim sneers that he doesn't want their sodding prize and storms out. Liz tries to cover her embarrassment and asks Raquel to draw again. This time Maureen wins and the pair are gobsmacked when they come face to face with the prize - the very basket Reg gave Maude and which when last seen was being thrown over the sofa to make way for Reg and Maureen's carnal embrace!

Raquel happens to be in the doorway to the back when she sees Vickie and Steve heading up the stairs. She stops them and although they argue and say they weren't going upstairs to do what she thought they were going to do, she won't relent. She threatens to tell Liz if they won't come down. Steve (Now behaving like Spoilt Little Boy 4 if you're still keeping count) grumpily leaves and Vickie angrily tells Raquel she doesn't have to aswer to her. Raquel proceeds to give her a little lecture about how a girl has to have standards. She can't compromise herself by letting a bloke do what he wants when he wants! All too soon blokes think your life should revolve around theirs! An unimpressed Vickie asks if she's finished, because if so, she'd like to take a bath - alone! Raquel sighs and the phone rings. Vickie pauses on the stairs long enough to hear Raquel perform the "do as I say, not as I do" tango as she says "Oh, hi Wayne!... Of course... I'm NEVER too busy to talk to _YOU_!"

Maureen and Reg stroll home together and he steers them past his flat door. She's never been up there, he notes - perhaps she'd like to come up and see his etchings? (Well, he doesn't actually say "see my etchings", but the intent is pretty evident in his beady eyes and wiggling eyebrows). She asks if it can be another time. "As long as there'll be another time," he says, and she promises. He ushers her into his car to drive her home.

Spoilt Little Boy 1 is at home still sulking when Angie comes in. She said that she was going to be back in a couple of hours, he pouts. "Well, don't believe me when I say that!" says Angie tiredly. She explains she couldn't leave - there was a problem and team spirit and a'that was very important. She couldn't leave until it was sorted. She tried to ring him lunchtime, she points out, and he was out (probably his quick trip to the Rovers, he says begrudgingly) and she did look for him in the pub when she was done (she did, we saw her). Has he spent the whole day on his own, then? "Don't worry about it," he glowers.

"Third time lucky!" crows Phyllis as she digs into the huge egg in the shocking pink Easter basket. She offers some to Mike Baldwin, who accepts. At a nearby booth, Spoilt Little Boy 2 is moaning and groaning to Deirdre about his disasterous holiday. Glancing at Baldwin, who is up to his elbow in Phyllis' chocolate egg, he points out that "I'm in competition with a man who can convince a pensioner to part with her prize chocolate!" In response to Deirdre's query about how he and Maggie are holding up to the stresses, he replies "not well". As he and Deirdre leave, Mike can't resist taking a few verbal pokes at him about the unsuccessful vacation, but at Deirdre's urging Ken managers to ignore him. Mike laughs smugly as they leave.

Well, that's your lot! ronniecat =^..^=

Written by PATREA SMALLCOMBE Directed by ROMEY ALLISON

Wednesday (3528, Wednesday 14 April 1993)

An incredibly busy episode, with numerous scene changes and lots of snappy dialogue, but since most of the events today had little to do with advancing storylines (and my shorthand has greatly declined), I've had to give only a thumbnail sketch for a few of them.

The episode opens early in the day at the Rovers Return. Liz and Jim MacDonald have moved in temporarily, while Bet is away in Tenerife, and Jim is telling Liz that he still can't get used to living in a boozer. He's just home from another night shift, but before he goes upstairs to get some sleep, Liz asks if he'd mind changing the barrels since it's Jack's day off. Jim agrees, but would prefer to have his breakfast first.

Angie asks Neil if he'll be home for his tea that night, and Neil at first says yes, and then changes his mind and tells her he'll be out playing cards with "the lads," He suggests that she not wait up for him, and she flippantly says "okay." Apparently he was expecting a series of question about his planned evening, but since Angie didn't take the bait, his disappointment is evident.

Back at the Rovers Return, Jim answers the door to find Andy and Steve, both on the prowl for some home-made breakfast. Andy's also looking for a loan, since he spent his last tenner on a night out with Amy. As everyone crowds around the breakfast table (Steve, Andy, Jim, Liz, Vicky and Raquel), Raquel makes it clear that she isn't pleased with the lack of elbow room, since she's used to quiet meals with Bet.

At the Corner Shop, Deirdre asks Percy how Emily is getting along with driving her new car. Percy thinks it's all a matter of Emily getting a little more self-confidence in her driving abilities. As he leaves, Denise asks Deirdre how long Percy has been sharing accommodations with Emily, and they both laugh when Deirdre explains that it's been at least five years since he asked if he could be her "temporary lodger." Angie and Denise take a few moments to discuss the "games" that guys play, with Angie explaining that Neil seemed disappointed when she didn't interrogate him about his plans for that evening.

The staff at Bettabuys are busy clocking-in for the morning shift, and when Ivy sees Andy there, she asks how he is, remarking that his face still looks a bit of a mess. Andy knows it doesn't look all that great, but as a "casual" employee, he isn't entitled to paid sick days. Besides that, he wanted to get back to work. Maureen and Ivy are both appalled to learn that Andy isn't being compensated for the days he was off recovering from his injuries, given that he was only trying to recover Bettabuys' money when he had the confrontation with the armed thief.

Vicky announces that she's off to do some shopping in town, but before she can leave, Raquel pulls her aside and tells her she ought to "watch herself." Raquel is convinced that Vicky would have gone to bed with Steve if she hadn't caught them sneaking upstairs, but Vicky informs her that she isn't stupid, and even got a "A" in biology. Raquel scoffs that that's beside the point. Boys of Steve's age do nothing but "take, take, take -- and once they think you're a pushover, there's no going back." "How did you manage, then?" asks Vicky sarcastically before taking her leave.

At Bettabuys, Maureen and Ivy confront Reg and ask if it's true that Andy isn't entitled to paid sick leave. Reg begins spouting labour law, and informs them that Andy is "casual," so gets nowt. "The computer only knows yes or no," he explains, and besides that, he doesn't make the rules. Maureen isn't convinced, though, and declares the policy "rotten." In defence of the store, Reg assumes his usual unctuous tone of voice when challenged, and yammers on that Jim was the one who "...stood by and watched it happen. Why don't you go talk to him? If he was half the soldier he's cracked up to be, no one would be needing time off." Maureen tries to shush Reg, points over his shoulder, and Reg turns to see that Andy is standing nearby and has obviously overheard everything he just said. As Andy approaches, carrying an unopened case (apparently for shelf restocking), Reg stammers again that he doesn't make the rules. Andy stops, glares at Reg, and purposely drops the box a few feet from his esteemed boss. Amid the sound of breaking glass and Reg's "oh noooo," Andy walks off in disgust. "My mother always said you were miserable about money," is Maureen's concluding remark to this wonderful scene.

Again to the Rovers Return, where Steve is looking for a free lunch. Liz tells him to go into the back, where Betty will bring him some chicken, and jokes that they'll end up owing the place a small fortune for food. Derek and Mavis arrive for their lunch, and Derek whinges about how unfair it is that teachers receive more paid vacation days than the janitorial staff.

In the back room, Vicky presents Steve with a gift she bought him that morning -- a new pair of jeans. His gratitude naturally leads to a snog session, until Betty comes in and asks whether Steve would like "a breast or a leg." Chortles all around, but Raquel only rolls her eyes in disgust and advises Betty to give him hot pot instead. Apparently Jim hasn't managed to get to bed yet, because he comes into the room and very grumpily asks the kids to leave so that he can grab a nap on the couch. Steve and Vicky exchange knowing glances before Steve asks if it would be okay if they went upstairs. "Go where you like!" snaps Jim. As they leave, Steve sticks his head back into the room and tells his dad that "if he'd stayed in bed, we wouldn't have this problem," causing Jim to lose his temper. He flies out of the room in pursuit of Steve, slams him up against the wall and mutters that he doesn't need that sort of back-talk while a frightened Vicky watches.

In the Bettabuys' staff room, Ivy approaches Andy and hands him an envelope of money, telling him that she and Maureen did a "whip 'round" of the staff to compensate him for his lost pay. Inside there are £40, and while Andy is reluctant to take it, he eventually agrees. Seconds later, Reg tells Andy that he's sorry for the remarks he made earlier about his father. He also hands Andy a cheque for £60, but Andy refuses to take it.

Raquel complains to Betty about the "mob" at the breakfast table that morning while Liz brings the lunch takings into the back room. She asks Jim if he had a row with Steve, since he had a very long face when he left, and Jim admits that he shouldn't have lost his temper. She also wonders if he could give her a hand counting the money, but Jim declines because he needs some sleep. On his way up the stairs he sees Vicky, who is about to come down. He pauses, seemingly wanting to make some sort of explanation, but apparently changes his mind and continues on his way.

Ken arrives at Maggie's, and gives Mark a gift(?) of a remedial math book, supposedly to help him overcome his math difficulties. Mark asks if he can take it to Nicky's, but Maggie reminds him that their tea is nearly ready. Mark claims he isn't hungry, and nearly dashes off before Maggie reminds him that he's forgotten the book.

Percy is shining his shoes while remonstrating to Emily (who is apparently in the other room) about how her confidence is bound to increase if she spends a bit more time negotiating "roundabouts." While he condescendingly prattles on about how she needs to concentrate more behind the wheel, we hear the door slam and a car engine starting. Percy dashes outside just in time to see Emily drive off. As reinforcement, Deirdre walks past and remarks that Emily looked quite confident!

Neil and his pals arrive at Des' house for their card game. When Des informs them that he was expecting them later and hasn't yet had his tea, they tell him they've brought along a take-away.

Back at the pub, Angie turns down Denise's offer to buy her a drink. Denise assumes that Angie is angry at her, and they get into a discussion of Neil. At a nearby table, Ivy asks Maureen how serious she is about Reg. While Maureen insists that Reg isn't a "bad" sort of guy, she also claims that she's not really involved with him.

Angie tells Denise that she only wishes that when Denise and Neil split up, Denise hadn't told him that she'd met another man. Denise reminds her that she only said that to "get rid" of Neil -- in fact, there wasn't anyone else in the picture. Angie thinks that Neil has become insecure as a consequence, so wants to know what she's up to when she isn't with him, whereas Angie is more comfortable in the relationship and doesn't need to know what Neil is doing every minute of the day. Angie's lack of interest seems to bother Neil, though.

Reg joins Maureen and Ivy at their table, and produces a bag of groceries. In his continuing quest to get into Maude's good books, he wants Maureen to present the food to her mother, since they represent some of her favourites. Ivy's eyebrows go up until Reg assures her that of course he paid for them.

While Alma relaxes on the sofa in their apartment, Mike answers the door and is pleased to find that it's Mark. He asks if he can spend the night, and Alma immediately wants to know if his mom knows that he's there.

At work, Jim hears someone approaching and turns off his radio so that he can hear better. He's just about to investigate when Andy appears with a flask of hot coffee for his dad. He asks Jim if he's having a problem with Steve, and Jim admits for the second time that day that he shouldn't have "flown off the handle." He asks Andy to apologise to Steve for him, and then Andy leaves for his date with Amy.

Maggie has arrived at Mike's apartment, apparently to take Mark home, but Mark wants to know why he can't spend the night. Maggie has already said no once (over the telephone, we presume), but Mark keeps pressing his case. Alma tells Maggie that she doesn't want to interfere, but she promises that Mark will be brought back first thing the following morning. "Suit yourself," Maggie angrily responds before leaving.

Angie lets herself into her darkened flat, and Neil appears at the bedroom door, dressed in his robe. He wonders where she's been and what she's been doing, causing Angie to respond that he's "paranoid." She confronts him by saying that she wants straightforward "yes or no" responses to her questions. "Do you believe that I love you?" is her first question, to which the answer is yes. "Do you trust me, yes or no?" to which the answer is also yes. "Do you think I trust you?" Neil answers yes again. Angie explains that whatever happened in their previous lives, before they became romantically involved, has nothing to do with them now, but "if we carry on like this, it won't last." She confesses that she doesn't want their relationship to end, and Neil agrees.

Back at the warehouse where Jim is doing his night shift, he hears a vehicle approach and more footsteps. He calls out Andy's name, but gets no response. Leaving his small office and taking along a flashlight, he sees shadows and hears the sounds of intruders. Using his walkie-talkie, he informs his partner that he has visitors, and then scans the area with his flashlight. In seconds he realizes that two adolescents have broken-in; they freeze in the light, but one makes a dash for it and escapes. The other has what appears to be a "re-bar" in his hand and he threatens to use it on Jim. Jim is by far larger and stronger than the lad, though, and in an instant he's disarmed and on the floor. As the lad cries out that he's sorry, Jim's clenched fist is poised to smash his face, but he can see that the boy is fearful. His pent-up rage over Andy's recent injuries is obvious as Jim struggles with himself, and then realizes that he doesn't want to hurt the young stranger.

Heather Morlan

Written by PAUL ABBOTT Directed by ROMEY ALLISON

Thursday (3529, Friday 16 April 1993)

Jim and Liz in the Rovers:

It's the morning after Jim has beaten up a 15 year old boy at the construction site. He's clearly going for the grain value in the whiskey he pours for his breakfast (is it just me or have the McDonalds well and truly taken over the Rovers in Bet's absence? She's not going to be pleased when she returns). He boasts about how the two "men" came at him with a crowbar, one of them ending up in jail, the other in the hospital. But he never lets on to Liz that they were "lads", not "men". Racquel joins them, this time dressed for breakfast in case all and sundry are there, as they were the day before. Jim practically throws the teapot at her and continues his rant, clearly believing he was in the right.

Angie and Neil in her Flat:

He's a sulky thing isn't he? She deserves so much better. Angie innocently teases him about his masculine pursuits (card games, dog racing, cock fighting...ooeeerrr :-)) and he takes a shot at her about Hanif (when are we going to see the delicious Hanif), and is that the sort of thing he gets up to? Angie points out to Neil that with the hours Hanif puts in, he doesn't have time for that sort of thing. She then diffuses the situation by giving Neil a hug and asking them if they're friends? Satisfied, he heads off to work.

Mark, Alma and Maggie at the Redman house:

Nervously Alma returns Mark to his mother after the sleep over at the Baldwins'. Maggie greets her son with a big hug that isn't really returned and invited Alma in for tea. Alma accepts, not quite knowing what to expect.

Betty, Liz and Racquel at the Rovers:

Racquel fills Betty in on Jim's crisis of the previous evening. Betty is clucking about all the violence going on in the world when Liz comes in and overhears them. She rebukes Racquel for skiving which sends Racquel off in a huff. Vickie comes into the pub and informs Liz that she'll need the kitchen as she's cooking a meal for Steve. Liz corrects her by pointing out that the pub kitchen can be used, but to make it early instead of later when the pub gets busy. Racquel sympathizes with Vickie and for her pains is reminded that she's staff and Liz has the right to boss her around. (Why is Vickie at the pub without Bet anyway? Surely Liz has enough to cope with without being responsible for Vickie also?)

Alma and Maggie at the Redman House:

Maggie tells Alma how afraid she is of Mike taking control of Mark. Alma points out that Mark is very level-headed, but Maggie is still concerned about Mike's ruthlessness. Alma promises Maggie that she will not allow Mike to come between Mark and Maggie, that Mike just wants what's best for Mark. "Surely that's all he wants", Alma muses to herself.

Derek and Mavis in the Kabin:

Derek reviews his report on Councillor Harry Potts and spells out to Mavis the highlights. Mavis asks if she can read it, but Derek clucks that his report is confidential. Steve comes in and is joined by Vickie, who invites him for dinner that evening. When Mavis points out to Steve that he's just like Derek in how he can't make up his mind and leaves it all to Vickie, Steve gives Vickie a raft of choices - all ending in "...and chips". As they leave, Mavis remarks on how she could never have asked her boyfriend for dinner when she was Vickie's age - if she had one that is :-). She wangles Derek's report off him, leaving Derek to comment that "...what's between those covers is going to rock the world of care taking to its foundations!" LOL!!!

The Rovers:

Liz is still having trouble with Racquel who objects to being told what to do by Liz (personally I don't blame her - her staff knows their job - let them get on with it). Jim staggers into the bar to pull himself a pint before his meeting with his boss over the events of last night. Liz asks if that's supposed to be his breakfast and he tells her to drop an egg in it. Racquel complains to Betty that Liz is pushing her too hard and she's going to tell her off soon. Betty comments that it's just because it's Liz's first time in charge and she's a little over anxious. Denise and Angie are having lunch together and talking about their one thing in common - Neil. Surely they're going to exhaust **that** particular topic soon? Angie comments that she doesn't mind Neil playing cards with his mates and Denise makes some sort of comment that I didn't really understand due to the fact that she had a mouth full of food. Jim finally admits to Liz that the robbers were only 15 and that the boss wants to see him to make sure there's no repercussions. Jim justifies his actions again by reminding her that there were two of them armed with a crowbar, but she is obviously concerned.

Maud, Reg and Maureen at Bettabuys:

Oh how I miss stuff like this! This has to be the funniest scene of the entire episode. Has anyone other than me noticed how Reg wears white socks with his suits?

Maud comes rolling into Bettabuys looking for Reg. She asks Andy for "...the fat fellow with daft looking glasses" (I couldn't come up with a better description :-)). Maureen, in a panic, comes running up wanting to know what her mother wants and Maud imperiously demands the personal attentions of Reg to help her with her shopping. In the meantime, Reg has observed this ongoing scene from the background and he takes off to hide! Maureen grabs a basket for her mother and they roll off to shop, Maureen having her foot run over for her troubles. Maud insists on having Reg's personal help and again clips Maureen's heels with her wheelchair. Reg is finally sighted and comes smarming over. Maud drags him off, demanding he show her everything in the store.

Mavis, Ken and Derek in the Kabin:

Ken tells Mavis how he used to think teachers had long holidays til he went back to it. Derek walks in and sees his Potter dossier in Ken's full view on the counter. When Ken leaves, Derek, in a panic, asks Mavis what she's doing leaving the report out for all to see. Mavis rips a strip off him for his report, calling Derek a "grass". Derek clucks that he's doing it for the good of the school, and despite Mavis's pleas to dispose of it, stands firm that he will give the completed report to Mrs. Jeffers.

Reg and Maud at Bettabuys:

Maud is finished her shopping and Reg is showing his usual smarminess by fawning over her. Maud begins relaying "Reg" stories to Amy and Andy - how he used to steal flowers from other peoples' gardens to give to Maureen and how he bought himself a body building kit. As he wheels her out of the store, Maud chuckles to Reg, "Did you ever get your money back?" LOL!!!

Ken and Maggie in Maggie's Kitchen:

Maggie tells Ken about Mark staying over at the Baldwin's the previous evening. Ken does his usual "anti-Baldwin" rant and tries to tell her what she needs to do. Mid-rant, Mark sticks his head into the kitchen. Seeing Ken sitting there with Maggie, Mark's smile fades and he withdraws. Maggie realizes that yes, she needs to do something, and proceeds to dump Ken - not exactly what he expected.

Liz and Jim at the Rovers:

Jim returns, three sheets to the wind, from an apparently successful meeting with his boss. As far as he and his boss and co-workers are concerned, the two boys were just thugs who got no more than they deserved and they've been celebrating with Jim. Liz is concerned that Jim is going to be asleep on his feet but Jim tells her he's been given the night off and plans to spend it in the Rovers. Liz goes into the bar and snaps at Racquel to serve Curly and Des who are trying to figure out what they're doing in the Rovers in the first place. Neil comes in and, seeing Denise, offers to buy her a drink which she declines. She snipes to him about his card game of the night before and points out to him how "...the ladies stick together". Sometimes I do feel sorry for Neil and I wonder about Denise's agenda.

Mike and Alma at the Baldwin's:

"She thinks you're ruthless" Alma tells Mike. She elaborates that Maggie is afraid Mike will try and take Mark away from her and that Alma has promised Maggie that she won't allow that to happen. Mike, as oblivious as ever, doesn't realize that Alma is being sincere and starts making it out to be a grand Machiavellian plot and, leaving Alma disgusted, wanders off to watch TV.

Angie and Neil's at Angie's:

Not knowing that Neil has seen Denise and had his card game discussed, Angie prattles on about how she told Hanif that she wouldn't work that night and that the wine was open and dinner was in the oven. Neil asks her what she told Denise about his evening and Angie says it was nothing of consequence, that she was just being flip. She tries to jolly him out of his mood by dragging him off for rumpeh pumpeh.

The Rovers:

Steve and Vickie, and Amy and Andy are in the Rovers discussing her boarding school and the money it takes to attend. Andy kid her that because she attends an all-girls school, Steve is safe - nothing to compare him to :-)

Reg buys Curly and Des a drink and the discussion turns to Maureen, Reg's "fancy woman"!! Curly teases Reg about how he's going to promote her until he has his evil way with her. Des asks where she's been promoted to and when Curly answers "The cheese counter", Des is suitably impressed; Reg, however, is not :-).

Andy orders 2 pints of bitter and 2 halves of lager from Racquel, prompting Liz to immediately butt in and tell Andy that one of the halves had better not be for Vickie. This royally ticks off Racquel - fed up, she turns on Liz and tells her that she is quite capable of doing her job and following the rules, including refusing to serve underaged minors. Liz tries to justify herself by saying that while she's in charge, she's **in charge**. All of a sudden, Richard Willmore appears out of nowhere and commends Liz's stand. Racquel slinks off as Liz tells Willmore that she has children herself, failing to mention that it was one of her children who tried to place the drink order in the first place! He asks how she's enjoying her time at the helm and comments that the takings aren't down - that, in fact, they're up a bit. He's clearly impressed with her management style - and I'm going to avoid the obvious comment about her skirts. Willmore sidles his way out and Liz asks Andy where Jim is. Andy doesn't know, but Liz finds him in the lounge, nursing another bottle of whiskey and thinking about his actions at the construction site. He finally admits to himself that he enjoyed what he did to the boy and that, if truth be told, he wanted to kill the lad. Jim realizes that the job is driving him crazy and that he can't go back.

Tracy Roketta

Richard Willmore: OLIVER BEAMISH
Written by: PETER WHALLEY Directed by: ROMEY ALLISON

Friday (3530, Monday 19 April 1993)

Monday morning, Mike arrives at the garage just as Kevin is opening up. Both are surprised to discover the heat has been left on, Mike assumes over the entire weekend. Kevin swears he shut it off on Friday but before they can figure out the discrepency, Doug rears his sleepy head from within a car to bid them "good morning". Apparently, having been chucked out of his sister's place by her husband the night before, he had no other place to stay. Mike warns that he won't be using the garage again so he'd better find digs. Besides the warning, Mike inisists on having the garage key back and informs Doug he'll be docked £10 for the heat he used up!

When Baldwin leaves, Doug asks Kev about staying at his house for a couple of nights - he'll be happy to sleep on the settee. No way, says Kevin - Sally uses the front room for her child care services and she wouldn't even consider the notion, sorry. Grumbling, Doug goes off to brush his teeth, remarking that he hopes the boss won't mind him using the water!

Angie is feeling pressure this morning. Neil would like her to take the day off work but with Mike rushing her through a t-shirt design job and deadlines to meet at Onyx, she simply can't afford the luxury.

Today's the day Derek is to hand over his "dossier" on Harry Potts to Mrs. Jeffers. He's got a scratchy throat in the morning which Mavis attributes to fear although Derek maintains he is not afraid of Potts. She thinks it's a question of morality - why ruin the man's career for the sake of a few afternoons off? But Derek points out that it amounts to a violation of a sacred trust - he is "taking a stand for honesty and decency against public corruption" he insists.

Jim is up earlier than Liz expected and she now rushes to get his breakfast before he goes off to work. He turns down her offer of an Ulster fry-up, apparently having a diminished appetite owing to his guilt feelings about the robbery attempt and his response to it. She tries to soothe him, telling him she knows he only did what he had to do but it's no good - he knows he crossed the line. He'd pack the job in if he thought he could find another.... "But who the hell wants an ex-squaddie - or a failed motorbike mechanic with a temper like a homocidal maniac?!" She offers him a comforting hug but they are interrupted when Raquel staggers in for her morning cuppa and comments that they should do their "canoodling" elsewhere.

Jack tries to get some money off Vera to carry him through to payday but she turns him down flat. She wonders how he could have gone through all his money in only four days but then she remembers there was a card game at the Legion on Friday night. "How did you hear about that?" wonders Jack guiltily. She found out from Ivy who was told by the Legion's barmaid who works Saturdays at Bettabuys! Jack pleads for a loan from the proceeds of the car sale but again Vera refuses. "That money is for R Tommy!" she insists. "Owt left over is for R Turry - to help him get set up when he gets out!"

In the Kabin, Emily seems to be helping out in Rita's absence. As she and Mavis pass the time doing minor chores, they chat about the business of driving in today's world, the traffic circles, the jams, the one-way motorways, all of which Emily finds quite daunting. Vera comes in with the baby and Mavis comments on how big Tommy is getting! Vera acknowledges that clothes for the tyke cost "a fortune", which reminds Emily of the days when neighbours used to knit all the clothes a baby needed. She pauses to ask Vera if there's been any news about the incident the other day (Vera taking the newly transferred car without Emily's permission OR proper insurance!) and Vera says she hasn't heard anything. She assures Emily they probably won't have any fallout as the police have more important matters to occupy them since there is a "crime wave" on. "The police have criminals to catch!" Mavis segueys into asking Vera how her Terry is, which doesn't go down well with Vera! She takes exception to hearing Terry's name mentioned in connection with "criminal" and leaves the shop in a huff.

At home again, Vera finds some unexpected mail from the courts. She opens the letter and is upset by the contents. Upset, she bundles the baby and goes off to the Rovers to talk to Jack.

At the pub, Liz is taken aback when Mr. Willmore appears unexpectedly. She assures him things are running smoothly in Bet's absence and he ventures to suggest she is more than capable of handling things should a problem arise. Liz blushes at the compliment and is gratified to hear Willmore suggest that she would make a very competent manager. Suddenly, Vera bursts in to consult Jack about the notification from court. Slightly embarrassed, Liz excuses herself from Willmore to invite Jack to deal with Vera's problem in the back.

In the back, Jack looks over the notification and informs Vera that unless Emily has extensive insurance, they are in trouble. Vera doesn't see why there should be a problem - after all, she had coverage until a couple days before the incident! Raquel comes in to take her break but finding the Duckworths there she is moved to comment in frustration, "This place is more like Picadilly Station every day!"

Out front, Doug is getting nowhere fast in his quest for accomodations. He's already asked Don and been turned down. ("Ivy wouldn't like it.") Now, spotting Ivy with Don, he goes over to ask her himself. Ivy obviously hasn't even heard the request til now and seems eager to consider it but Don interjects to put Doug off. To Ivy's annoyance, Jack overhears and readily offers Doug the spare room at Chez Duckworth at £50 (a week? a month?). The deal struck, Ivy sarcastically thanks Don. He asks what the hang she was thinking - they don't even have a "spare" room! She seems genuinely surprised at his evident repulsion to sharing her room, even for a few nights.

Angie responds to a summons from her boss, only to discover that he's found out about her moonlighting for Mike. She inadvertantly left the design for the t-shirt amond some company papers. Hanif is none too pleased that she's been doing freelance work on his time. She apologizes and promises it won't happen again. He asks whether she's been paid yet as maybe his costs should be invoiced into the bargain! With a sharp warning, she sheepishly goes back to work.

Jim comes back to the pub for his tea, telling Liz he has to go back to work at midnight as he is doing a split shift. He's still downhearted about the events of the other night, how could he have been so savage towards a 15 year old boy? Liz again offers reassurance but he knows he needs to find something else for the sake of his sanity. "You may not have to wait that long..." she offers, "How would you feel about running our own pub?"

Denise pops into the Corner Shop for a few provisions and Audreh, bored as she is, (Alf is at an emergency council meeting - "probably a shortage of paper clips", according to Audreh!) offers to read her horoscope... Denise humours Audreh but when romance is predicted, she laughs off the idea...

Just as Mike is ready to leave the garage for the day, Hanif pulls up blocking his car in. Mike shouts for him to move it but Hanif coolly walks over to introduce himself. When Mike realizes he's Angie's boss he invites Hanif into the pub for a chat.

Seated at their own table, Derek informs Mavis that he's done the deed - the Potts report is in Mrs. Jeffers' hands now... Mavis wonders how it was received and Derek brags that the headmistress seemed very impressed. "That report was dynamite, Mavis - dynamite!" Unmoved, she sniffs, "Yes well, let's hope it doesn't blow up in your face, shall we?"

As Mike and Hanif stand at the bar chatting, (Hanif: So you were in the business? Mike: Sunshine, I WAS the business round here ten years ago!) Denise makes her way from the bar but accidentally bumps into Hanif as she passes by. She stammers apologies but he seems not to mind in the least. When she leaves, he makes a point of asking Mike if she is local and is told she runs the hairdressing salon across the street.

In a better mood now, Jim volunteers to go down and change the bitter now. Jack seems a bit put out but holds his peace until closing. As he and Doug leave the pub together at the end of the day, he asks Jim if he has designs on his job. Laughing at the notion, Jim says the last thing in the world he would want is a cellarman's job! When he locks the door after them, he adds, "Now a pub manager, that's a different story!"

Angie has her hands full trying to complete her work for Mike and Hanif. Like a spoiled child, Neil whines about her not paying attention to him again. She snaps that she is under enough pressure already and doesn't need him adding to it. Then she stupidly relents, apologizing for working so hard and promising she'll be finished soon! (Ugh)

Jack brings Doug home and breaks the news to a fatigued Vera that he'll be staying with them for a while. Vera eyes the mechanic with mistrust and informs him that she doesn't have any tea for him ("S'alright, Vera - I've et...") and no booze in the house either... ("No problem there - I've drunk enough already this evening...") Reluctantly, she agrees to have him stay though Jack somehow neglects to even mention the £50!

Anita Bélanger

Richard Willmore: OLIVER BEAMISH Hanif Ruparell: AYUB KHAN DIN
Written by HARRY DUFFIN Directed by DAVID RICHARDS


Originally transmitted: 21, 23, 26, 28 & 30 April 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 24 - Friday 28 April 2000
Episode Numbers: 3531 - 3535

Monday (3531, Wednesday 21 April 1993)

Doug is doing his best to flatter Vera over breakfast and though she's warming up to him somewhat she's still a bit reserved. When he offers to stay and help with the clean-up after breakkie she seems genuinely touched but tells him he mustn't be late so he goes ahead to work. Once he's gone, Jack reminds Vera that his presence means an extra 50 quid a week, (so he *has* told her!) which Vera is grudgingly pleased about, as long as it's in *her* hands!

Emily pops into the Kabin to offer a helping hand and Mavis readily accepts. Derek drops in on his way to work and Mavis implores him to not worry over the dossier. He isn't worried, he insists - anyway, it's all in Mrs. Jeffers' hands now, "the dye is cast..." When Derek goes, Mavis confides to Emily - she feels almost like a mother, sending her son off to school and hoping the bullies won't pick on him. Emily, feeling rather helpless with the revelation, doesn't really know how to answer.

As Neil goes off to work, Angie tells him she is staying home this morning to work on Baldwin's design. Hanif knows, she assures him, prompting a gently teasing remark about what he would do to her if *he* was her boss!

Jim comes in from his night-shift and reports to Liz that he's packed in his job. She's dismayed at the news and listens with trepidation while he recounts that last night, being at the building site where the attempted robbery occurred, he was forced to relive the event. When he suggests that managing a pub together is only around the corner anyway, she corrects the impression, saying Willmore's offer wasn't solid and even if it were it might be months or years before they are offered their own pub! Jim responds with his usual maturity, "Okay so I've done it all wrong again!"

In the Corner Shop, Audreh is curious to know who Doug is buying chocs for. He jokingly asks if he'll get a discount for telling and Alf quickly interjects, no he will not! Amused, Doug admits they're for Vera, telling the Roberts how grateful he is that she's opened her door to him. After Doug leaves, Reg comes in looking for supplies for "an evening's entertainment". Alf wonders why he isn't shopping at Bettabuys but as Reg explains, the element of surprise would be lost if he did. "Ah - a checkout girl!" concludes Audreh with a knowing smile.

In the corridors of Weatherfield Comprehensive, Derek is scrubbing the floor when Harry Potts goes by. The senior caretaker stops to compliment Derek on a "grand" job to which Derek replies that it's a "thankless" one. Potts agrees and goes on to philosophize that *all* of caretaking is "thankless". He reveals that he is on his way now to see the headmistress. Derek is startled to hear it and when Potts laments that she has it in for him, he hastens to reassure him. Still, Potts maintains Mrs. Jeffers "has vinegar in her veins" and would do anything to get rid of him. As he proceeds to his meeting, Derek's face betrays pangs of regret for his boss' presumed fate...

Mike comes into the Rovers midday and cheerily asks Raquel how it's going under Liz' management. Raquel makes no bones about saying she can't wait for Bet to return, that Liz is "ten times worse". She nudges Betty to enlist agreement and Betty nods her assent. Just behind them, Liz and Jim are arguing in hushed tones about the fact that he gave up his security post prematurely. Again, he admits he was wrong and says he'll go and ask for his job back.

Angie pops in to see Mike on her way to the office, showing him the completed design which he agrees is "brilliant". Mike mentions his talk with Hanif the evening before, catching Angie by surprise. She seems irate to hear the boss has been checking up on her but Mike downplays it, Hanif was curious, that's all...

Liz takes the plunge and calls the brewery. She is gratified to be granted an appointment to see Mr. Willmore this very afternoon.

Meanwhile, Vera has left Tommy with Mavis in the Kabin for a few minutes and she now enters the pub seeking a word with Emily. Having had a brainstorm, Vera tells Emily she knows a way they can both get out of the driving violation. Vera's plan is that Emily should pretend to have "gone mental" as she did before, "taken a bad turn"! Far from agreeing to the notion, Emily fires back that she'll do no such thing and leaves the pub in a fury. Vera sees her reaction as confirmation that Emily still isn't a well woman - as she tells Jack, she must feel great shame for having had her breakdown.

Derek is quietly chewing his lunch in the school yard when Potts exits the building. He stops to have a word with Derek - he's off for the afternoon and will leave things in Derek's capable hands. Derek can't stand the suspense and asks how the meeting with Mrs. Jeffers went. "Oh that..." Potts brightens, "Well I'm not at liberty to discuss it yet, *but*... How would you feel if you thought we wouldn't be working together for much longer?" With that, he goes off leaving Derek to puzzle over what he could possibly have meant.

In Willmore's office, Liz nervously approaches the subject of her and Jim having their own pub. She tells him they are both "keen" and wonders whether his offer was a serious one. Willmore assures her it was, subject to availability of a pub and their suitability of course. When he asks if Jim would be available for an interview, Liz readily responds that he is - fibbing that he is "on leave" from his job at the moment!

As Andy is soon to leave Bettabuys to return to Sheffield and he and Reg now share a bit of friendly banter about Andy's future. Reg suggests that he's had quite an education himself, coming up through the ranks of Bettabuys. Andy seizes the opportunity to have a little gentle fun but it's so subtle that Reg takes it at face value. "Oh yes - you'd have the equivalent of degrees in Business Management, Food Studies, Psychology..." With a sniff of satisfaction, Reg straightens his bow tie and bidding Andy well, goes off for a word with Maureen. To his disappointment, she has to cancel their date for this evening - her mother is having a bad day. He puts on a brave face, telling her sympathetically that he understands.

At Onyx Fashions, Angie catches up with Hanif to discuss a work project. She also makes it a point to mention that she doesn't care for his "snooping" around Coronation Street. He denies the charge, saying he was just curious. To her surprise he adds that if he should be over in that area again, it *won't* be to check up on her!

Jim is gratified to hear of the positive tone of Liz' meeting with Willmore. Cockily, he remarks that he wouldn't be surprised if they fire Bet and give Liz the Rovers! Raquel happens to be standing nearby and shoots Jim a look but doesn't confront the remark. Embarrassed, he lowers his tone to Liz, "Well they might..."

Vera has received the choccies from Doug most appreciatively and now confides in him about her problems with Emily. He listens in sympathy, nodding in agreement when Vera suggests she should be back at "the funny farm"! Jack comes in and seems a bit annoyed to find them chatting so cosily. It appears he isn't so sure he did the right thing, inviting Doug to lodge with them now!

In the back room of the pub, Jim and Liz have called the boys together to make an announcement. It seems they are destined to move up in the world as they now expect to be running their own pub in the not-too-distant future... The boys don't seem too excited one way or the other but they listen as Liz talks about what it will mean to them. They'll be selling their house to go and live in this pub... Neither of the boys is very concerned about this eventuality - Andy will be at Sheffield and Steve reckons he's old enough to make his own way in the world. Slightly deflated at the realization, Liz comes to terms with the fact that as her sons are now adults, the business of running a pub will concern hers and Jim's future only.

While Angie is home griping to Neil about her boss checking up on her, Hanif comes into the Rovers and asks for juice at the bar. Denise happens in a minute later and the two exchange greetings, "surprised" to run into one another again. He plays down the coincidence, saying he found the pub "interesting" on his last visit and made up his mind to come again...

Derek and Mavis are having a drink as he tells her how worried he is about what Harry Potts told him. She doesn't have long to speculate as Potts himself comes in and joins them at their table. In answer to Derek's query, Potts admits he has been mysterious but says he couldn't say more until he was sure. It turns out that he will be moving on - to the position of Chief Caretaker at the Technical College. As Derek's mouth falls open, Potts continues... Mrs. Jeffers has apparently written him a "glowing" letter of reference. As he raises a toast to the woman, Derek's mouth still hangs open in shock til Mavis gives him a nudge. "Well that's wonderful", she beams, isn't it Derek?"

Anita Bélanger

Richard Willmore: OLIVER BEAMISH Hanif Ruparell: AYUB KHAN DIN
Written by PETER WHALLEY Directed by DAVID RICHARDS

Tuesday (3532, Friday 23 April 1993)

In the Kabin, Derek is still in a dither about the goings-on at the school. Why, he wonders, did the headmistress ask him to keep a dossier on Harry Potts in the first place if she intended to give him a glowing recommendation? Mavis wonders if the whole "dossier" wasn't Derek's idea in the first place and if Mrs. Jeffers wasn't just playing along, although Derek swears he was just doing what he was asked. Mavis is glad the whole Potts episode is over but Derek wants "justice" and won't rest until he gets it!

At the Duckies' Vera is making a cooked breakfast for Doug, to Jack's annoyance. Doug's a paying guest, Vera notes, but Jack replies that he's a pain in the neck! Vera reminds Jack that it was he who brought Doug to stay with them. When Doug appears she even tries to convince Jack (*finally* able to access his bathroom) to give up his newspaper so Doug can read it. Jack icily replies that sitting "on the bog" for ten minutes in the morning with his newspaper is a pleasure he gives up to no man!

Jim is giving Liz a hand in the Rovers; they're getting things ready early so they can go to their meeting at the brewery that afternoon. Jim is anticipating the pleasures of being his own boss, so he is. A sleepy Raquel appears in her bathrobe wondering what they're up to. They explain they're doing extra work early so Liz can be off for a few hours that afternoon for a meeting with... their bank manager, yes, that's it, the bank manager.

In the Bettabuys employee area, Andy and Amy canoodle a bit and then have a kiss. It's Andy's last day before returning to University. Reg catches them, but instead of chastising them, he encourages them to grasp their opportunities where they can! They make plans to go out that night for a "goodbye" good time.

In the salon, Denise coos over Tommy as Fiona pokes at Vera's hair. Vee wants something new. "Y'can't do much wi' a perm, Vera," she's warned, but Fiona offers to loosen up her poodle curls and soften it up a bit! That sounds lurvely.

Reg approaches Maureen on the floor at Bettabuys. She's in a very bad mood. When he offers to help, she gives him her shopping list - collecting those things for her would help. Reg, typically, passes the list on to Andy and tells him to leave the items in Reg's office, once he's finished packing this lady's groceries. "This lady" is a woman who Amy is in the process of checking out, and Amy insists that the lady doesn't need any assistance, but Reg sharply overrules her. Andy amiably begins packing the lady's groceries as she tells him not to pay any attention to "our Amy". She then goes on to reveal herself as "our Amy's" mother. Andy introduces himself, and patting a cute little boy on the head, says to Amy, "you never said anything about a baby brother!" Mother laughs and says that she isn't still having babies at *her* age - that is Dominique, "our Amy's little boy". Amy looks hugely embarrassed and Andy looks surprised, to say the least.

Liz and Jim leave for their meeting with the "bank manager", dressed in their Sunday best. Jack mutters; he,s wondering what Jim was doing in "his cellar this morning and whether this bodes ill for his job.

Back at Bettabuys, Amy catches up with Andy. He backs out of their date that night. She guesses it's because he now knows about her son; he says it's because she didn't *tell him* about her son. She says she didn't tell him because she knew what would happen if she did. He replies that he's not just any bloke, but nevertheless he definitely seems overwhelmed with the thought of dating a woman with a child. He seems to want Amy to wait for him while he's at University but is afraid to make a commitment to her now that he knows she's responsible for Dominique. Amy snaps that she thought he was different, but she's already got one kid to deal with and she doesn't need another.

Denise comes into the Salon looking for money to pay Don Brennan, who's dropped her off. She has no change so they agree that she will give him a haircut next week in lieu of the cab fare.

Jim and Liz have just had a brief tour of the brewery with Richard Wiltmore. They settle into his office for a chat. He offers Jim a drink, but Jim replies that it's a bit early in the day for him. (Full points there.) Wiltmore says he's delighted they're interested in working for the company; they've been very pleased with the running of the Rovers since Bet has been away. Jim guesses, then, that it was him they wanted to check out. "Just an informal chat," smiles Wiltmore. They don't condone physical violence, he goes on, but they look for someone who "looks as though they can control the situation without actually having to resort to doing so." They'll require references from present and past employers, he says, and will do a criminal background check. Jim assures him there'll be no problems. In that case, says Wiltmore, it's time to schedule a formal interview for the coming week.

In the Kabin, Derek is STILL going on about Harry Potts and the unfairness of him moving on without getting his comeuppance. Derek says he can't let Potts move on to some unsuspecting organization - he's got the dossier. No, Mavis corrects him - Mrs. Jeffers has the dossier and if she has any sense she'll have burned it. "How can you say that?" asks Derek, aghast. It's justice he wants! "Is it? asks Mavis. Or is it revenge for being bullied? He should forget the past and look to the future, she urges... Pott's leaving leaves the door wide open for Derek's own promotion.

At the employee lockers, Reg tells Andy that if Andy needs a job in future, he would be welcome there, and if he ever considers a career in retail, Bettabuys is always looking for bright youth things. Andy thanks him and breaks off the conversation to rush after Amy, who's just passed by. He just wanted to say "bye", Andy says awkwardly. "Yes, well, now you've said it, haven't you?" she replies frostily before walking away.

Angie is thanking Hanif for giving her a ride home. It must be well out of his way, she says, but Hanif says he has "business" in the area. He continues a little ways down the street and parks, gazing at Denise's Salon as he gets out of his car.

In the shop, Doug plays up shamelessly to Vera, gushing over her hair. (And for once the "salon staff" appear to have done exactly what they claimed; Vera's poodle hair is no more and it is more loosely curled, shinier, and more flattering. Another Corrie milestone recorded: the end of Vera's poodle 'do.) Vera cackles with delight. Alf, Audrey, Emily and Angie can hardly believe they are witnessing this display. As landlady and guest leave together, Angie muses that "some people will do anything for an extra sausage with their breakfast!"

The day's last customer leaves the Salon. Fiona grabs the broom but Denise tells her to go and enjoy herself - she'll clean up. Denise obviously likes to look her best while sweeping, for as soon as Fi's gone she begins applying lipstick in a salon mirror.

In the Rovers Liz and Jim discuss their day. Liz thinks it went well - they got a formal interview. Jim is pessimistic, however; he thinks their chances will be sunk when the brewery interviews the security firm and finds out about the robbery. Liz tells him there's no point worrying about that. Jack, observing them, knows there's something up. Raquel is more interested in watching Hanif, who's in a booth, and speculating who he's waiting to meet. She's titillated to see Denise come in and join him.

Neil comes home and Angie tells him there's a casserole in the oven. This is the opening for her to mention to him that it's getting a bit expensive for her, cooking for both of them. She's very nice about it, and Neil is very nice in response, admitting he should've thought of that. He very reasonably offers to pay her a set amount each week to cover his expenses - whatever Angie feels is fair. For no apparent reason, Angie suddenly goes all shy and embarrassed and says she wishes she'd never brought it up and begs him to forget about it. Neil says no, what she said makes sense, but she verbally runs him over and urges him to come with her to the Rovers for a drink. Looking baffled, he agrees and goes to get changed. Angie gives a look that says she's frustrated with herself and she knows she made a mess of that conversation. [Watching this, I wondered what Angie was doing - the whole conversation went so nicely and smoothly until she back-pedaled - but perhaps I've forgotten how gut-churningly, toe-curlingly awkward these little things can be in the early days of a relationship!]

Back in the Rovers, Derek's been moaning yet AGAIN about Harry Potts and Alf points out that it hardly matters *how* Potts left, as long as Derek's rid of him! Mavis agrees and begs them to change the subject. Audrey (who must be near tears of boredom) ducks out of the booth to dish with Denise, who's at the bar getting drinks, about Hanif.

Liz and Jim tell Jack and Raquel about the real reason for their meeting. Raquel plays up to them (could she come work for them?) while Jack is more noncommittal. Andy is there too and he says he thinks it's great news, but Liz can tell there's something bothering him. He says it's nothing. Neil and Angie come in and see Denise and Hanif cozying in a corner. In response to Neil's question, Angie tells him who Hanif is - her boss! She is surprised and a little bemused; Neil seems less pleased.

Well, that's your lot! ronniecat =^..^=

Richard Wiltmore: OLIVER BEAMISH Hanif Ruparell: AYUB KHAN DIN Dominic Nelson: LEON ANWAR Kathleen Nelson: ALIBE PARSONS
Written by KEN BLAKESON Directed by DAVID RICHARDS

Wednesday (3533, Monday 26 April 1993)

Early morning, and we find ourselves at the Duckworths' where Vera is calling Doug down for his breakfast. At the dining table, Jack is moaning about how unfair it is that the MacDonalds are getting their own pub to manage. To Jack's convoluted way of thinking, it's all down to him that the MacDonalds will be moving on, and when Vera asks him to explain, he likens his role to that of the foot soldier in the trenches who gets wounded in battle. The generals ultimately get the glory, just as the MacDonalds will move on to a higher station in life after *he* showed them the ropes(!). "What's to stop us from running our own pub?" he asks Vera, but she cuts him dead with her response, "YOU, for one thing." Their conversation is interrupted by Doug, who sails into the room, plants a kiss on Vee's cheek, and flatters her about her clothes and make-up, eliciting the expected response of a huge fry-up for breakfast.

At Bettabuys, Reg sneaks about and surprises Maureen as she works at stacking shelves. He tells her she looks "delectable," and asks about her weekend, while adding that his own was spent "languishing," thinking about her. Maureen comments that he does look "a bit piquey," and Reg tells her that she can rectify things by spending some time with him. Maureeen does her usual twittery, bashful routine, saying neither yes nor no, so Reg suggests that they get together around 8:00 o'clock that evening -- at his place. Maureen giggles at the prospect and uses her pricing gun to stick a tag on Reg's nose.

A few aisles away, Curly stops to admire a display being put together by Ivy and Amy. Ivy thanks Curly for the compliment, but Amy more or less scowls and continues to work in silence, prompting Curly to guess that she's unhappy because Andy has returned to Sheffield. "But don't you worry," he advises, "he'll be back soon." Amy glowers at him, informs him that she doesn't care, and knocks over the work she's just completed before stomping away.

After Doug's departure for the garage, Jack returns to the topic of them managing a pub. As far as he's concerned, if he and Vera put their minds to it, they could easily get their own pub, especially given Jack's experience. Vera is cool on the subject, however, until Jack begins pointing out all the benefits -- Tommy would be better off, their income would increase, they'd have loads more space, and there would be a job for their Turry when he's released from prison. Vera reminds him that the last time they went for an interview, Nigel Ridley sent them packing, but Jack puts that down to his own attitude then, and the fact that there wasn't a vacant pub available. When Vera still seems doubtful, Jack plays the flattery card, telling her that he can just picture her (in a new frock, hair all done-up) behind her own bar. "Hey, I'm royalty, me," responds Vee. When Jack mentions Terry again, and the fact that he'd be able to walk straight into a good job once his sentence is served, Vera begins to get excited by the prospect.

Don Brennan pops into the beauty salon, looking for a quick hair cut, but Fiona is busy and doesn't recognize him. He's about to leave when Denise walks through from the back. She's pleased to see him, but as they are busy, she suggests that he come back around 3:00 that afternoon.

At the Rovers Return, Betty tells Liz how pleased she is for them and their new pub management jobs. Liz assures her that it isn't in the bag yet; there are several steps they have to complete before they can actually start working. They still have a formal interview to get through, and if they're accepted after that, there will be training to complete, as well as a temporary placement under another manager. If all that goes according to plan, they'll finally get their own pub to run.

After closing the garage, Kevin and Doug head to the pub for lunch. En route, Doug tells Kevin about his new living arrangements, laughing that he's got Vera wrapped around his little finger.

Back at the pub, Audrey asks Liz about Andy's return to university, and Liz lets on that he must have been experiencing girlfriend problems before he went back, judging from his mood. While Betty is busy serving the patrons, Jim walks past Jack behind the bar and jokes that people are waiting for their drinks (and that Jack ought to get to work). Jack is offended by the crack, so removes his apron and heads for the door. When Liz asks him where he thinks he's going, Jack's response is "call of nature." At home, he goes straight to the telephone. While Vera wonders why he's home during the lunch hour, fearing that he's got the sack, Jack ignores her and dials. When he gets a response, he asks the person on the other end if he can speak to Mr. Richard Willmore about a pub managers' position.

Don returns to the salon for his appointment, and while Denise trims his hair, he tries to impress her by saying that he pulled a lot of birds in his younger days. At one point, he notices that Denise's hand is deformed, and this leads to a discussion of their respective physical limitations. Don admits that his feelings toward his amputation are confusing; sometimes he feels that he's come to terms with it, while other times he wants only to shut himself off from other folk because he feels ugly. Denise asks if he thinks she's ugly because of her hand, and gets an immediate and sharp "no!". Denise confides that as a child, she was self-conscious, but as an adult, she learned that most people don't even notice her hand. She counsels Don not to allow his amputation to make him bitter and twisted, noting that her hand didn't put off either of her husbands.

At Bettabuys, Reg peruses a chocolate display and chooses a box for his evening with Maureen. Curly happens by, and advises that if he's going to give chocolates, he should choose bitter, since it's all the rage with chocoholics these days. Curly also suggests that if he's trying to set a romantic scene, he shouldn't forget scent as part of the room's ambience. Reg snorts that the day he needs advice on seduction will be the day he's suffering from senile dementia. However, as Reg heads toward his office in response to a page, he stops to pick out a room spray.

Don offers to pay for his trim, but Denise reminds him that it's on the house, in repayment for the cab ride he provided the other day. A rather handsome Don admires himself in the mirror and remarks that Ivy won't recognize him -- "or resist you," adds Denise.

In the corner shop, Audrey whinges about it being late in the day, and while most other shops are closing, they stay open. As though to reinforce the point, Reg breezes in looking for fresh dill. Alf has only fresh parsley to offer, but Reg insists it must be dill for a very special cassoulet he's preparing for dinner. He decides to go to another small grocery store nearby, where "they cater to discerning patrons."

Percy escorts Olive into the Rovers Return and then makes a show of asking Liz if everything is alright and whether or not they need his assistance. Liz realizes immediately that Percy is trying to impress his lady friend, so doesn't ask what he's going on about. Ivy comes in, looking for Don, and when she finds him at the bar, she explains that she'll be at Vera's for the next little while. She notices that he's had his hair trimmed, but her face falls in disapproval when she learns where he had it done. After she leaves, Jack jokingly wonders if Denise offered Don a dirty weekend. "More than that," replies Don, "she told me the facts of life."

Reg sprays his flat with his new room spray. The lights are low, and romantic music plays in the background when he buzzes Maureen up. He fusses for a few seconds in front of the mirror before letting her inside. "Pretty as a picture," is his characterization of Maureen, who giggles and twitters under his attentive stare. She goes into a coughing spasm when the room spray makes its presence felt, but Reg claims it must be the cassoulade cooking in the oven.

At the Duckworths', Vera asks Ivy if she could babysit Tommy for a few hours the following day. She explains that they have an interview at Newton and Ridley's, and she begins listing all the advantages of becoming pub managers -- they'd have more money, there would be more room for Tommy, Terry would have a job, they could buy a new car, etc. Ivy tries hard to make Vera understand that the interview doesn't necessarily mean that they'll be chosen, but Vera regards it as "just a formality." Ivy gently reminds her that the MacDonalds are younger than them, but Vera believes that the brewery will be more interested in Jack's experience. After all (according to Vera), Jack practically runs the Rovers Return by himself! She even feels that having Tommy will work in their favour, since the brewery is family-oriented. Not noticing the pained expression on Ivy's face, Vera goes on about how she hopes that she and Ivy will stay in touch after they move -- after all, she's never been the sort of person to forget her friends as she moves up in the world! "I hope you'll be happy" Ivy mutters insincerely, quietly shaking her head to herself.

Phyllis sidles up to Percy at the bar, but he tells her she can buy her own drink today, as he's with someone else. Jim asks for a pint, and is surprised when Jack glowers at him and tells him outright that he doesn't work for him. Jim realizes Jack is referring to his behaviour that lunchtime and apologizes, claiming that it was all just a misunderstanding.

After finishing their meal, Reg suggests to Maureen that they get "more comfortable," and move to the sofa. There, Reg tells her that "recent obstacles" have only increased his feelings for her, and it's now time to bestow a token of his affection upon her. Then he fairly lunges at her in a crude effort to, ahem, "bestow his token," and while almost on top of her, Maureen makes indescribable mouth noises (mphfff, umph, ooooh, giggle) that hint more at being uncomfortable than being in the throes of passion. As the apparent wrestling match heightens, the telephone rings, but Reg ignores it. "It could be my mother," protests Maureen (actually, she said "mutha"), so Reg finally picks up the instrument, making it clear though that he's doing it under duress. It's Maude, and Maureen snatches the phone from Reg's hand. "How long have you been lying there?" queries Maureen, and after hanging up, informs Reg that her mother has fallen out of her wheelchair, and is at this very moment lying on the cold kitchen floor. A disbelieving Reg rolls his eyes in exasperation and wonders how she managed to get to the telephone if she's in such dire straits, to which Maureen responds that she "probably crawled." "Can't you see this is just a ruse to get you away from me?" Reg implores, but an angry Maureen screams "NO, NO, NO -- I DO NOT SEE! And if your desire to have your way with me is stronger than your concern for my mother..." "Yes!" is Reg's immediate reply, as he tries to take her arm and lead her back to the sofa, but Maureen shrugs him off. "Yes? Well... I'm not sure there's a future for us, Reg Holdsworth," she screams before slamming the door behind her, leaving so hastily that she forgets her coat.

Heather Morlan

Olive Clarke: JOAN SCOTT
Written by MARTIN ALLEN Directed by GARETH MORGAN

Thursday (3534, Wednesday 28 April 1993)

We open at the Duckworths, Jack affirming his commitment to go after the pub manager's position and Doug and Vera encouraging him. Vera points out that he did once run his own business, the window-cleaning round. Doug feels the key is in convincing the brewery they can handle the post. Jack says he's that fed up being cellarman at the Rovers, he reckons if a barmaid and her flunky husband can handle it, so can he and Vera!

Meanwhile, the McDonalds are also preoccupied with the business of the brewery's selection process. Jim thinks it's in the bag but Liz doesn't want to take anything for granted. It's easy for her, he says - she's proven herself as a "winner" in Willmore's eyes but this may be *his* last chance!

Angie must be getting used to Neil's whining by now, it's become so commonplace. As she rushes around getting ready for work, he complains that she's more interested in coming up with "another earth-shattering" t-shirt design than she is in him. "Why don't you just say on it, 'World's most original design' and have done with it?" he snipes. She takes exception to the remark but Neil insists he's tired of playing "third fiddle" to Baldwin and Hanif.

Regulations have been violated at Bettabuys and Curly now reprimands a pretty young lady on the length of her skirt. As she is sent off to make the required adjustment ("no more than two inches above the knee") Reg approaches and he and Curly estimate just how short the young woman's skirt was. Dipping to get a look at eye-level, Curly guesses eight inches but Reg, who's been doing this longer, takes a look and informs him with confidence, "Ten"!

Changing the subject, Reg discretely whispers to Curly that their conversation of this morning, concerning "matters of the boudoir" never took place. He then spots Maureen and inquires of her about "Mummy". Maureen confesses with some embarrassment that it was only a false alarm last night. Her mother hadn't actually fallen out of her wheelchair after all but she felt dizzy and was afraid she might. Reg nods knowingly, professing to "understand completely" and Curly excuses himself to work on the holiday rosters. Maureen offers that she would like to try to make it up to Reg for last night - if he's free of course... He answers that he already had plans for the evening but with a conciliatory sniff, he admits he could change them. They agree that she'll come to his flat at half-seven.

During a typically busy morning at the Corner Shop, Les Curry, one of Alf's cronies, pops in to inform Alf of an upcoming WARTS (Weatherfield Association of Retail Traders) meeting. In a flurry, he is gone again to take care of other business. Emily has been talking to Audreh about holiday brochures. Apparently, she is thinking of having some time away. Audreh reminisces about the lovely time she and Alf had when they went to Devon but to her surprise, Alf says they have never been to Devon and she must be thinking of some other place. With an embarrassed giggle, Audreh excuses her "poor memory" and it's evident to us that while her memory of Devon is accurate, it was not Alf she was there with! Neil pops in for some shopping and Alf stops him to ask about some shelving for the back room. They agree that Neil will come in tomorrow to measure up.

In the pub at lunchtime, Audreh and Denise have a natter about romantic memories and Audreh's feeling that life is passing her by. She complains that they never do anything spontaneous now and tells Denise about the boyfriend she once had, the one who apparently brought her to Devon. "He'd call and say, 'Pack your bags, we're going away for the weekend', then we'd just go! Sometimes we didn't even know where we were going til we got there!" Denise can relate as she's had two "of those", and both times she married them.

Behind the bar, Jack reminds Liz that he'll need some time off this afternoon. When Jim asks to know the reason, Jack shoots him a look and Liz tells him that it's been cleared with her - Jack has a "dental appointment". From across the bar, Don tells Doug that he has every confidence "Jimbo" will make a fine landlord. Betty corrals Jack to ask why he *really* wants time off and when he reiterates the lie about going to the dentist, she replies sarcastically, "Yeah - and I'm going to my ballet lesson!" Ivy, at Don's side, says he shouldn't be so openly supportive of Jim and Liz when Jack and Vera are also applying to run a pub. She doesn't think it was very "charitable" of him as Jack's friend. Don tells her to be realistic, he can't see the Duckworths running a hot dog stall, let alone a pub! With an air of regret, Ivy grudgingly agrees.

At home, Vera is in the midst of getting ready for their interview. She tells Tommy that "Auntie Ivy" will be over soon for him and that it's going to be the start of something big for them all. "People won't be sniggering at the Mucky Duckworths for long -- making snide remarks about their jailbird son..." She immediately apologizes to the baby for the remark about his father, she weren't thinking, she explains. Ivy arrives to collect Tommy and as Vera hands him over, she tells Ivy how much this chance means to her and Jack. Ivy urges her not to get her hopes too high but Vera dismisses her concern. "If Bet and that fat man are good enough, so are me and R Jack!"

Angie goes into the Corner Shop on her way home from work to buy the necessaries for a "moonlit picnic". Audreh thinks it's a lovely idea but Alf grunts that "sitting on damp grass with moths flying in his face" is not his idea of fun! He goes off to the Cash and Carry, leaving Audreh and Angie alone in the shop but no sooner has he left than his pal Les Curry arrives for the second time that day, looking even more breathless than earlier. Audreh tells him he's just missed Alf but no matter, he only came in to relay the message that the WARTS meeting has been changed... Before he can give her the details, he clutches his chest and drops to the floor. Audreh lets out a panicked scream as Angie drops to her knees to attend to the fallen man. Panicked, she calls for Audreh to ring for an ambulance.

Jack and Vera await Mr. Willmore in the outer office, wiling the time away looking at the brewery's albums of former landlords and landladies. Jack remembers certain of them with fondness and says he can imagine him and Vera now, running their own place, holding celebrity bashes... "That would link my two worlds nicely - show biz and our own pub..." Interrupting the reverie, Willmore comes out to inform that he'll see them now.

Angie arrives home and is surprised to see Neil there in the middle of the afternoon. He is equally surprised at her arrival and listens while she tells him about the trauma she's just witnessed in the Corner Shop, mentioning that Les Curry has now been taken to hospital. When he asks what she was doing there at that time, she tells him her idea for the picnic. Evidently, they both had the same idea - to make up to each other for their argument of this morning, she with plans for a picnic and Neil by cooking her a special meal.

During their interview, Jack boldly informs Willmore that he can do "owt" around a pub and Vera adds for good measure, "Bet would be lost without him, you know!" As an afterthought, Jack adds that the brewery would have no worries that he and Vera would split up as Bet and Alec did - "Oh no! We've been happily married for over 30 years!" adds Vera helpfully. Mention of the longevity of their marriage leads Willmore to comment on their relative "maturity"... Vera is quick to assure him that they are both fit and Jack chimes in with reference to Vera's last job. "She were indispensable, you know. Oh yes, Reg Holdsworth begged her to stay". Willmore replies politely, "Be that as it may... I understand you're looking after your young grandson - that is a matter of some concern to me..." Vera unhesitatingly informs him that that is a temporary situation - "Only til his father gets out!" Jack shudders as Vera anxiously tries to amend her remark. "He's a fine, decent young man, R Turry - it were a miscarriage of justice!" Willmore tentatively ventures to ask what Terry was charged with. Jack answers with a sinking heart, "Grievous Bodily Harm"...

Emily drops into the Kabin and stands chatting with Derek about her plans to go south and take a course in pottery. Derek recalls that "Mavis' friend", Victor Pendlebury, used to do pottery - he, Derek, called him "Potty Pendlebury", he chuckles with an air of superiority. A shriek from the back interrupts and they rush back in concern to find Mavis has been struck in the head by a faulty overhead light fixture.

As Willmore escorts the Duckworths from their interview, Jack suggests hopefully that the interview was "mutually beneficial". Willmore politely concedes that it was "enlightening". Vera asks for the powder room and the brewery boss directs her before making his way back towards his office. Jack calls him back to ask "man to man" whether they stand a chance. Somberly, Willmore informs him that realistically, they don't. Jack asks if the business of Terry's criminal record was the deciding factor but Willmore tells him that other considerations also influenced him. In all honesty, they never really stood a chance. Jack wonders why if that were the case they were granted an interview at all and Willmore relents it was more a courtesy to a long-standing employee than anything else.

Just prior to 7:30 p.m., Maureen gaily pops into Reg's flat and catches him by surprise. He quickly recovers himself and reverts to his usual suave "Romeo" style... She comments that was always a sore point with her mother - his glib tongue and roving eye. "Ah but Maureen", he glibly explains, "that was because I needed *you* in my life!" She smiles that even as a girl, he always had a way of making her feel special. "And now I'm a man and I know how to make a woman feel special!" he promises. (*Gag* *retch* *heave* LOL)

After a romantic dinner, Neil and Angie seem to have forgot all about their earlier disagreement. Sitting comfortably together on the sofa, he can't resist making a comment about Hanif and Denise. Angie snaps out of her dreaminess at the mention and turns to face Neil. "That really bothered you, seeing them together - didn't it!" she accuses. He denies it but she doesn't believe him and it looks like the mood is spoiled for now...

As Reg declares his "love" for Maureen (prompted by her seeking assurances that she isn't merely another 'notch' to him), he goes so far as to call her his "destiny"... She is overwhelmed by the notion and readily falls into his embrace. Then, the phone rings. They argue again about whether he should answer and when he does, (predictably) it's Maureen's mother. Without a word, Reg hands over the receiver to his destiny.

In the Rovers, Audreh tells Alf how upset she is about Les Curry's attack. Alf reckons his friend will be all right, now that he's in the hospital, citing his own three attacks from which he emerged "just fine". Audreh argues that had more to do with luck than anything and pleads for him to consider selling the shop before he ends up like his friend. She wants him to give up the rat race while they are both young and healthy enough to enjoy his retirement.

Reg turns up in the pub and gets short shrift from Jack when he orders his drink. Liz steps up to take over, excusing Jack's behaviour by telling Reg about his "long session at the dentist's". The scene sets Jack off again and he makes his exit, telling Liz he needs to go home on an urgent matter. Curly joins Reg at the bar, ribbing him about his evening of "entertaining" being cut short. Grumpily, Reg concedes that once again, the evening was spoiled by Maureen's mother.

Vera is surprised to see Jack home early. He tells her they have to talk and she assumes he's there to tell her off for speaking out of turn at the interview. She never meant to tell Willmore about R Turry but she reckons now it's just as well he knows, he would have found out sooner or later. Jack interrupts to tell her it doesn't matter - they didn't get the job and they were never even being seriously considered in the first place! Disappointed as she is, Jack's regret is keener. "This is as good as it gets, Vera..."

Anita Bélanger

Les Curry: TONY BROUGHTON
Written by ADELE ROSE Directed by GARETH MORGAN

Friday (3535, Friday 30 April 1993)

As Reg readies himself for work in the morning he stands before his mirror, practicing what he'll say to Maureen... His speech begins with the theme of the seasons of life, "May to December", but he loses the thread and ends in a curse directed at Maureen's "miserable flamin' mother"!

Vera offers Doug more toast in the morning much to Jack's annoyance. The lodger declines her offer, saying he's off to work. Jack follows him to the door to remind him that today is Friday, rent day. Doug assures him he hasn't forgotten and Jack returns to the dining area for a ticking off by Vera. She doesn't see that Doug should be hounded for rent so early in the day and reminds Jack that it's to come to *her* and not him anyway! Jack gripes that he's sick of their lodger getting "the VIP treatment" while he has to scrounge for leftovers. Between Doug eating "every morsel of food in the place" and the baby "yarling" all night, he can't even feel at home in his own house anymore! He claims he didn't sleep a wink last night and she calls him out on it, saying that when she asked him to get up in the night and fetch a bottle for Tommy, he was sound asleep! She tells him to quit his whinging and get off to work which Jack comments is another sore point - now he has nothing to look forward to! Vera has no sympathy, "Yeah well - it's worse for me, ya know! I have to listen to yer moanin' on top of everything else!"

Derek stops into the Kabin on his way to the school to let Mavis know he'll be taking off early this afternoon to repair the light that attacked her yesterday. She tells him it won't be necessary, she can get an electrician in and anyway, isn't he worried he'll get into trouble, leaving work early? "Nonsense - it stood Harry Potts in good stead!" Derek tells her he's tired of being taken for granted - he's always given the job his utmost and look where it's got him - Potts the skiver gets a promotion!

Emily comes in to pay her paper bill and Mavis asks if she'll be available to help out in the Kabin this afternoon. Emily says she won't be able to as she's made plans for the afternoon. She's driving down to Stiles to see the windmills. She explains that Percy is planning a lunch for his friend, Mrs. Clarke, and she wants to keep well out of his way! Mavis comments that Percy seems to be spending a great deal of time with the lady and Emily says she reckons he's smitten - apparently he's become even more fastidious than usual, trimming his moustache every night *and* morning!

When Don pays Denise a surprise visit at the salon, she remarks it's a bit soon for a trim. He says he's had some compliments on the cut she gave him and has a proposal for her. Denise listens attentively while Don suggests he could have her business card in the back of his taxi, a sure way to increase her patronage. She seems a bit reluctant, wondering what's in it for him til he suggests that she would display his card here in the salon. "You're on", she agrees. Mission accomplished, Don stops before leaving to tell her again how much he appreciated their talk of the other day. He mentions that he found her very easy to talk to. Denise well understands the inclination. "There are things you can say to some people that you wouldn't tell your nearest and dearest... Especially NOT your nearest and dearest!" she winks.

At Bettabuys, Reg tells Maureen that whenever they plan an evening together, they will be thwarted by her mother. She admits the truth of his observation and sighs with resignation that their romance is "hopeless". "No Maureen - it isn't hopeless! It's just a question of not letting your mother in on our plans!" He informs her that they'll both take the afternoon off and that way her mother need never know. She suggests they might be in trouble for leaving so early but Reg tells her confidently that he is the manager and if he wants to take the afternoon off, he will! As he leads Maureen towards the staff lounge, he tells her to meet him at his car in five minutes. They encounter Ivy stacking some shelves and Reg stops to tell her that "Mrs. Naylor" has a sick headache and will be going home early. Ivy readily agrees to assume Maureen's duties for the afternoon and tells Maureen she hopes she'll be better soon.

Having taken care of Maureen's absence, Reg now uses the in-house phone to ring Curly's office. Matter-of-factly, he barks into the phone the time (12:27 p.m.) and that he's leaving Curly in charge for the remainder of the day. "Another golf game?" Curly asks. "No, Norman - a game of an entirely different nature", Reg chuckles. "Though I dare say the ultimate objective is much the same!" he adds with a guffaw. (LOL!!)

In the pub, Betty comments about Jack's cheerless demeanour. He confides to her the real reason for his absence yesterday afternoon and a sympathetic Betty hears the news that he and Vera were turned down flat. "Too old?" she guesses. "Too old, too thick, too married to R Vera..." he says sadly. Doug comes up to the bar for a beer and Jack reminds him that he's still waiting for the rent. Doug assures Jack that he's got it but that Vera warned him to give it only to her. Disappointed, Jack concedes the issue but when Doug mentions that he's off to the bookie's to place a bet on a "sure thing", Jack asks for him to place one for him too. "You can take it out of the rent you owe". Doug turns down the idea so Jack relents and hands over a fiver from his pocket.

Elsewhere in the pub, Audreh reiterates her request to Alf about selling the shop in favour of retirement. She'd only like him to have the chance to spend some of his hard earned money while he still can. He knows she is really thinking of his best interests but kyboshes the idea of a seaside cottage. "You'd be running a bed and breakfast for people who want a free holiday!"

Reg and Maureen's afternoon of romance is well underway with the aid of some mood music and a bottle of sparkling rosé. He of course doesn't need the wine - Maureen's presence is "intoxicating" enough for him. They lament having been parted all those years ago but also celebrate having once again found each other now that they are both "free". But, as Maureen says sadly, she isn't entirely "free" - there is still her mother to consider.

As Percy and Olive Clarke sit in the Rovers having a pre-lunch drink, he tells her appreciatively that he likes a woman who enjoys her food as she does. Olive says she supposes she should lose a bit of weight but Percy protests that she shouldn't, she is a very handsome woman just as she is. Phyllis comes in and invites herself to join them above Percy's protests. Unheeding, Phyllis argues that it's a "public house" and she can sit where she likes. In that case, Percy decides he and Olive are leaving. As they make their way from the pub, Phyllis addresses Olive bitterly, "You wouldn't even have found him after all these years if it hadn't been for that magazine article!"

She goes over to the bar and Jack commiserates with her for a minute before Liz and Jim come bouncing in, triumphant from the latest step in their screening procedure. They beam as Liz tells Betty they've been accepted for training school. While Betty warmly congratulates the pair, the news is more than Jack can handle. He goes off in a sulk declining to acknowledge the report.

Derek shows up at the Kabin in the early afternoon as promised to repair the light fixture for Mavis. She expresses surprise at seeing him, protesting again that it would have been simple for her to call the electrician. "Anyway, what happens if the school finds out you've left early?" she asks. "I expect they'll promote me!" he answers glibly. With confidence he goes into the back, assuring Mavis he knows what he is doing, having picked up new skills in his custodial job.

Upstairs in Reggie's flat, he escorts Maureen to the bedroom to show her his prized waterbed. He tells her proudly that no woman has ever shared this bed - he bought it new after his divorce. Deep down, he thinks he must have been "saving it" - for her... (Oh geez! LOL)

Derek is up on his step-ladder by now, telling Mavis with some annoyance that no, he does not want to help her mark the papers, he's busy! As he drills into the ceiling, he puzzles about the fact that water begins to drip through the hole...

Fiona is off for the day, Denise handing her her pay packet as she goes. As the young assistant goes out the door, Hanif comes in. This time he's here for "social reasons", he coyly informs Denise. She raises a half-hearted objection as he locks the door but falls eagerly into his arms when he embraces her.

In a panic, Mavis suggests Derek has drilled into a water pipe by mistake. "Don't be silly, Mavis! Of course I haven't drilled into a water pipe!" She answers defensively, "Don't tell me I'm silly - you're the one who drilled into the water pipe!" But Derek reckons the bath in Reg's apartment must have overflowed.

Upstairs again, Reg and Maureen are enjoying in the waterbed, she giggling at his compliments ("You're more beautiful than ever to me, Maureen) commenting on the bed's "squishiness" and asking him if he'll remove his glasses... ("Yes, if you want me to..." "Yes please, Reggie") She reveals that in her horoscope this morning, she read "big surprise across the waters", causing Reg to reply, "Uncanny!" Their intimacy is interrupted before it begins by a loud persistent pounding on the door. Suddenly, they hear Mavis and Derek calling up to Reg. He wants to ignore the disruption in the hopes they'll go away but Maureen can't ignore it so he reluctantly goes to see with a striped towel around his waist...

He takes a step back at seeing his neighbours, as do they at the sight of him. Derek explains that they were afraid he was dead in the bathtub but before Reg has time to inquire further, Maureen screams from the bedroom. Reg goes rushing to see what the problem is, followed closely by Mavis and Derek. They come upon an hysterical Maureen, shrieking out that there's water all over the floor and the bed seems to be collapsing around her. Reg urges her to get up. "I can't get up - I'm naked!" she shrieks. When he hands her a dressing gown, she suddenly becomes aware of Mavis and Derek standing in the doorway and lets out another scream, "Who are they!?" Embarrassed, Mavis starts to explain that Derek was drilling in the ceiling below... Reg repeats, "DRILLING? You idiot! You drilled right into my waterbed!" A gasp from Mavis and Derek protests, "Now, now - that's sheer speculation!" Angrily, Reg tells him he'll have him for this, Maureen all the while screeching to be let out of "this contraption"!

When Doug comes home, Jack again asks him for the rent. With disappointment in his voice, Doug says there's been a "hiccup", that the hot tip didn't pay off. Jack sardonically supposes that means he lost the rent money at the bookie's but Doug insists that he never bets more than he can afford to lose. He then explains that his "other" money is tied up just for the weekend. He'll have it by Monday though and asks Vera if that's all right... "I s'pose it'll have to be", she answers flatly.

Curly has given Ivy a lift home from work. Now as they emerge from his car, they witness Maureen, the Wiltons and Reg standing in the street, Reg and Derek shouting at one another about liability. Ivy comments to Curly that she thought Maureen had a nasty headache. "That's not a bad description for Reg", he deadpans. As the neighbours look on with interest, the shouting increases, each man determined to get the last word. Suddenly, Maureen snaps and addresses Reg. "I'm utterly humiliated and all you care about is your stupid waterbed!" she shouts as she storms away. "Maureen, where are you going?" he calls meekly after her. "Home! To my *mother*! And I shall be very glad to get there!" she hurls back. Defeated, Reg turns again to Derek. He gives him a push backward as he charges, "You've wrecked my bed and you've wrecked my life!"

When Derek finally manages to escape to the safety of the Kabin, Curly can't resist crossing the road for a word with Reg. "Uh... so how was your 'game'?" he asks playfully. A bitter look from Reg and Curly goes on... "Don't tell me you got bonkered?" Reg lets his head fall to his chest and Curly takes another stab... "Worse? *Not* the dreaded lost balls??" (LOL) As the credits roll, we see Reg's pale grey loafers floating around aimlessly in his bedroom...

Anita Bélanger

Fiona Middleton: ANGELA GRIFFIN Olive Clarke: JOAN SCOTT
Written by JOHN STEVENSON Directed by GARETH MORGAN


Originally transmitted: 3, 5, 7, 10 & 12 May 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 1 - Friday 5 May 2000
Episode Numbers: 3536 - 3540

Monday (3536, Monday 3 May 1993)

Dougie steps out to get the milk only the empty bottles are still there. Jack had the last of the old milk and of the bread and isn't bothered that his lodger has none as he hasn't paid his rent yet. Doug promises to get it. Jack rightly points out he found money for booze and "brags" (gambling i assume because the relic from the 60's whines that his "mojo" wasn't on last night). Jack orders him to get it off a mate but find the money!

Liz has inspected the kitchen prior to Bet's return and it's Jack's turn next, and Liz marches him down the cellar without even a cup of tea for strength first.

The Kabin stock room looks pretty dismal - if anyone has ever dropped a book into the bath they'll know what waterlogged paper looks like! LOL! Derek and Mavis survey the damage, nervously predicting Rita's reaction. Derek wishes he could skip out but Mavis insists they will face Rita together.

At Manchester airport arrivals, the raucous laughter is heard before the two tanned faces of Bet and Rita appear. They are in high spirits, no doubt basking in the after effects of very similar airline brand "high spirits". Don waits with a sign that says "Duchess of Devonshire" although Bet insists she's the Queen of the Muck 'Eap, it's Rita who's the duchess and they all three have a laugh putting on airs about limos and such. Yes they had a great time. Don jokes that the Rovers didn't miss Bet at least but his words about the Kabin having a leak bring Rita down to earth soberingly.

Back at the good ship Kabin, Mave and Derek are enduring Reg, accosting them with a list of his personal belongings damaged in the flood for Rita's insurance company's perusal. Derek thinks Reg is taking advantage and Mavis thinks Reg's insurance should be the one to pay and wonders if it's even prudent to have all that water over people's heads. (She has a point, about the insurance at least!)

Outside, Hanif in his red Mercedes convertible, rudely honks the horn instead of hauling his lazy butt out of it and knocking on Denise's door properly. She skips out and jumps in, all done up to the nines. My word! Give her just a little more practice and her hair do will rival that towering beehive Bet was sporting! They're going out someplace really nice (Bank Holiday). He lays on many smooth phrases (man that consistently wear red sport jackets often do, i find!) And away they go. Kevin and Reg come down the road, Reg making sour grapes types remarks about Hanif's class car and getting teased about double beds for his trouble.

The travelers return. Don gets Bet's cases out of the taxi while Rita remains in the car, apparently rendered incapable of walking that last 50 feet to her place as a result of the news about the leak, that which she doesn't even know the full extent yet! Derek peers through the window, reporting on the approach to a quivering Mavis, offering to face the music alone but she's braced for it and will stand up with him.

Bet marches into the pub with a twirl and a chorus of Viva Tenerife and enjoys the greetings. She teases Jim and Liz, stringing them along while revealing Don's words about her not even being missed. Happy to be back, is Bet, but could murder a pot of tea. I know the feeling. I made my sister find an open convenience store on Sunday night on the way home from the airport so i could have milk for a cuppa!

Over in the shop, Rita surveys the slightly damaged area behind the counter but the stock room door is closed. I see, breaking it gently then.? She's told the words is in the stockroom but, even braced for the worst, Rita is shocked at the extent of the damage she's faced with. Derek fumbles and sputters and tells her it came from the ceiling and just wouldn't stop. Rita assumes first it was the plumbing but when she hears the first half, that it came from Reg's waterbed, she's ready to swing for Reg. Oh but that's not all, Derek and Mavis stutter out the rest, Derek shakily miming a drilling motion with one finger (hoping Rita doesn't match it with another one of hers!) and when Rita realizes Derek was responsible for it all, she loses her mind!

Audrey gets her shots in at Alfeh's insistence at opening on a bank holiday Monday. They've even got Deirdre in working, rather an unnecessary expense if you ask me). Alf thinks there's no point to going out on an Bank Holiday as the roads will be packed. Emily mentions that Percy and Mrs. Clark have gone to Chatsworth on a mini bus (Ooh, wouldn't mind doing that, myself!) and she is going to revel in having the house to herself all day. Deirdre makes a good point, telling Alf he should take Audrey out if only to stop her complaining but he thinks she'd only find something else to complain about. But as the shop custom grinds to a halt later, Alf decides life really is too short and closes up. He doesn't even let Angie in when she knocks on the door and he tells Audrey they shall go to the seaside after all!

Doug, putting in an hour or two in the garage as a favour for a friend (hope he's gerrin' paid, we know how Baldwin feels about moonlighting with his equipment!) A rather odd looking Scot in Elton John specs comes in looking for help. He's just bought this van for 85 quid this morning and it's stopped dead. He's had some lads help him push it over and wonders if Doug could look at it since he's there. Doug is rude and doesn't want to help but is reluctantly persuaded. He lays eyes on a VW camper van and "clapped out" is too good to describe what's sitting in the courtyard. It's a rusty, dented heap that looks like it was rescued from a metal compactor! Doug does give it a cursory once over and proclaims it unfixable. The guy tries to sell it to Doug as a fixer upper but Doug is skint of course and turns him down. Still the poor man ends up abandoning it and walks off sadly learning his lesson. Doug finds the ownership papers and looks as though he's got an idea.

Rita cannot believe what Derek did. Mavis, her voice taking on an edge of hysteria, has now fixated on the folly of keeping "millions of gallons of water" over other's heads. Rita asks why Mavis hadn't called the insurance agency's emergency number. Hadn't thought of it. And anyway what about Reg's insurance covering it? Rita doubts very much if Reg's insurance will cover lunatics from the center of the earth that come up drilling! Derek takes exception to this, Mavis squeals again about those millions of gallons of water and Rita screams at them both to just shut up!

Next time we see Rita she's tearing a strip off Reg in the pub to the amusement of Jim, Kevin and Don. Reg wants their insurance companies to deal with it. The lads are humming a tune in the background, tunelessly but it meant something to Reg so it must have been some sea faring shanty or other to take the P*** out of him because he's clearly vexed with them over it. Behind the bar, Bet is taken aback when Liz admits she liked being in charge so much that she and Jim talked to the brewery and have been accepted to do some training to get a pub of their own. I think she was more miffed that they took the bull by the horns rather than let her be their mentor. Back to the other side of the bar and Reg continues to be shot down by the lads' remarks about the ship of love running aground with all hands on deck. For the first time Rita finds something to laugh about when she realizes what Reg was doing IN the waterbed when it was burst!

Outside, Hanif and the still impeccably coifed Denise arrive in the mercedes which still has the top down. By rights she ought to look like Medusa about now but she looks like she's only driven round the block! Hanif must drive to London and though he invites her, she politely puts him off and invites him in for a coffee before he heads out.

Rita and Bet settle down with a sherry. They chat about Reg and about Rita's new duty free perfume. The conversation turns to Liz quitting to run a pub. Bet can't resist joking cattily about a reference for them "She's very dedicated to serving the ale and he's very dedicated to supping it!" But secretly is amazed that someone would actually come to Bet Lynch for a reference, a sure sign of coming up in the world. But no, she wouldn't scupper their chances.

At the seaside, Alf and Audrey have just enjoyed a long walk on the beach. Though Alf doesn't look particularly relaxed, still hatted and necktied, he has appreciated the healthy sea air and is ready for a nap. They've both apparently enjoyed themselves quite a lot and Alf even suggests they stay overnight, much to Audrey's delight. I didn't get much of what they said as the musicians in the bandstand were too loud but they cuddled on a park bench and discussed their lives i think. They sure looked a picture together for a change and i've just got the loveliest freeze frame of the two of them sitting there, smiling with one of Alf's arms round her shoulder and the other holding her hand in their laps as they watch and listen to the band play. Do i smell retirement in that sea breeze?

Doug arrives back at No9 with no money but a proposal. He tries to sway Jack and Vera with thoughts of being able to go on holiday whenever they want and leads them outside to view the heap, now in front of theirs with the camper hood pulled up on top. He offers it to them in lieu of rent as it could be worth 500 quid for it's bits and pieces. He nearly talks Vera into it but Jack is no fool this time. He knows it's not worth the cobbles it sits on. It's a scrapper and it's an insult to his intelligence. In this case, at least it's true. See, the bloke that gave it to Doug was crying in his ale after he left it. So Jack cannot be fooled into believing the van can be made road worthy. Doug is told in no uncertain terms where he can sleep tonight and it's NOT in No9. Sounds and looks to me like Doug Murray is nearing the end of his rope.

Diane Johnston

Mr. Truscott JOHN LANGFORD
Written by JULIAN ROACH Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Tuesday (3537, Wednesday 5 May 1993)

There are good ways to start your day, and there are bad ways, and if you're Mavis Wilton, being confronted with the sight of Doug Murray, clad only in boxer shorts, crawling grunting out of a Volkswagon van on your street ISN'T a good way! Mavis could not look more horrified if Doug had all Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse over his left shoulder. She scurries like a rabbit to the Kabin, while Doug, still grunting, lurches toward the Duckworths'. He knocks on the door and, fairly quivering, begs Jack and Vera for a "use of the facilities". The answer is an emphatic "NO"!

Percy polishes the dining room furntiure - again. He wants the place to look special for Mrs. Clarke's visit, he explains to Emily. He goes on to ask if Emily could leave him and Olive alone for an hour or so that evening - he's going to ask Mrs. Clarke for her hand! He knows this will be hard for Emily, he says; although they've only ever been landlord and tenant she's been a very special landlady. Emily agrees that Mr. Sugden has been a "very special" tenant, too [I don't think she meant "special" in the same sense Percy dd, do you?] and hastens to assure him as earnestly as she can without being impolite that she is DELIGHTED at the news, LOL!

Mavis and Derek are in the Rovers discussing her early-morning eyeful. There must be *something* they can do, pleads Mavis. He was in *boxer shorts*, she shudders - and *they* weren't in very good condition! [You looked that closely, did you, Mave?] Derek notes that complaints before about other outrages have gotten them nowhere - just look at that Harry Potts, who's even now ordering a drink at the bar. Mavis notes that transport is Councillor Potts' area - perhaps he could help. Derek begs her not to give Potts the satisfaction of asking him for help.

At the bar, Potts is telling Bet about the possible upgrading of Rosamund Street and resulting demolition of the corner the Rovers stands on! There's no information in the public domain as of yet, of course [how convenient] but by the time it is, all the decisions will have been made. Not to worry, though; Bet has Councillor Potts firmly in her corner as an ally. She quickly orders a hotpot - on the house - to go with his drink. Mavis approaches and tries to turn Potts' attention to the matter of Doug living on the street in a ramshackle van with no running water, but he's not at all interested. Instead, Bet drags him to the other end of the bar to pursue the matter of the upcoming threat to the Rovers' location. He'd like to arrange a meeting with Bet "to discuss it further".

Deirdre takes a phone call in the corner shop. It's bad news; Alf's good friend Lou Currie has died. Emily is sympathetic and pensive at the news. She decides to make better use of her time and her opportunities, like her car. Will Deirdre join her in the Rovers to celebrate "the first day of the rest of [her] life?" She will! Emily sends Deirdre off to look for potpourri - the woody kind with twigs and such. Percy hates it, she comments - he likes his air freshener in tidy little blocks that remind Emily of mens' public toilets! [And just what is Emily doing in mens' public toilets?] On finding out Deirdre has three different varieties, she says she'll take one of each! Liz comes in and mentions the MacDonald's have their first training session at the brewery today. Deirdre asks Emily why she's buying potpourri if Percy hates it - is he going somewhere? Emily hems and haws and says she may have "said too much" before hurrying out.

In the Kabin Neil drops in to have a look at Rita's water-damaged storeroom; he's going to do the repairs. Percy comes in too and makes some comments about "real men" and handywork. Rita, trying to humour Percy, says that Emily often says how lucky she is to have a handyman like Percy around the house. She'd be lost without him! Percy snaps that he "only came in for a box of chocolates, not to discuss Mrs. Bishop's feelings!" Phyllis has come in and sidles up to Percy. She tells him that chocolates should reflect the personality of the giver, and in that case, "give 'im a box of hard centres, Rita!" Percy stalks out and Phyllis sadly admits to Rita that she thinks she's finally given up on Percy.

Audrey and Alf are back from their seaside holiday and are fairly glowing. They go into the shop where Deirdre breaks the bad news about Lou Currie. Alf is very shaken and must sit down. "He was only my age," he says disbelievingly. That's it, he decides - "we'll sell up and live at the seaside, you and me!" Audrey is sorry that it was due to Lou's death, but she is thrilled to hear him say it. "Don't go telling folk," Alf says. "We'll do it quietly." [Audreh? Keep sommat quiet?]

Emily puts out a bowl of her new potpourri and says "hi" and "bye" to Olive, who's just arrived. "You're not leaving me alone with this youngblood!" jokes Olive. Emily replies she's certain Mr. Sugden's intentions are entirely honourable. "You make it sound like he's going to propose," Olive teases. "I'll put the kettle on," says an embarrassed Percy as Emily just smiles.

In the Rovers, Bet asks Liz if she's heard any rumours about the Rovers' future while Bet was away. Liz says she hasn't. She tells Bet they're doing their training at The White Swan. They discuss the landlady's life and Bet asks Liz if she thinks she'll ever be ready for THAT - THAT being the sight of Doug Murray walking into the pub wearing nowt but his boxers and a cap! He loudly announces that his appearance is not from choice - that Jack Duckworth has all his clothes and won't let him have them. "Jack, are you responsible for this... apparition?" snaps Bet, without taking her eyes off Doug. Jack, behind the bar, protests that Doug owes him rent. "And how can I pay it?" Doug retorts, when his wallet is in his trousers and his trousers are at the Duckworths'? "Jacko - get 'im 'ome and get 'im dressed," snaps Bet, still fixing Doug with her finest glare. "He's puttin' folk off their beverages."

Outside the Rovers, Jack and Doug negotiate. He doesn't actually have the rent money in his wallet in the house [quel surprise] but if Jack gets his trousers he promises he will pay the rent and move the van.

Neil is slouched in front of the television, watching football and drinking a lager. Angie and Hanif come in. Neil is rude and surly to both of them. When Angie goes to fetch some paperwork for Hanif he tries to make polite conversation with Neil. "I'm going to take one of your neighbours out tonight," he tries. "A girl named Denise. Do you know her?" "Yeah," growls Neil. "I'm tryin' to watch this." He rudely turns the volume on the television up. Angie returns with the paperwork and Hanif takes his leave. "It was nice to meet you," he tries again. Neil doesn't respond at all this time. Once Hanif is gone Angie's understandably upset. Hanif's her boss, she reminds him, and Neil treated him like he were nothing. "So now I've got to suck up to your boss, do I?" snarls Neil, turning the telly off. "What's he done to you?" Angie wonders, baffled. "Why are you sticking up for him?" whines Neil. He thought Hanif was a slavedriver, according to Angie. Everbody complains about their boss, Angie points out - Hanif's all right. She suddenly twigs. "This isn't about him being my boss, is it?" she asks. "It's about him being your ex's new boyfriend!" Neil, suddenly subdued, says that's daft, but she's hit a nerve. He tries to cover and make it all right with a cuddle but Angie's fed up. She's going to the Rovers - if he wants her, he can come and get her.

Percy and Olive are enjoying her chocolates at Emily's. Percy tries to broach the proposal - he's been nervously broaching it all night only to lose his nerve. They both know what it's like to be lonely, he begins poignantly. "Are you going to go down on one knee?" asks Olive, again joking. "If that's what you want," says Percy - and he does so. "Will you marry me?" Olive gently chastises him for teasing a widow. He assures her he is sincere. Olive is shocked. "I've got strong feelings for you, Percy - but marriage! It never entered my head!" She doesn't think so, she says. Is she sure? asks Percy. "I can cook. I can do all sorts. I can look after you. I'd be very pleased to look after you." Olive can't get past the idea of a man other than her Stanley in her house. Percy replies that he knows he can never replace Stanley. If Stanley was in this room, Olive wouldn't look at him twice, he agrees. "But Stanley's gone. The world Stanley knew is gone. Our world is gone. When you step outside that door it's like another planet. I don't understand half of what they're saying!" Olive knows that feeling. "You feel lost," Percy says gently. "I feel lost... but if we were together, Olive..." No, Olive replies, gently but firmly. Will she think about it? No. The answer is no. She begs him to get up - he's embarrassing her. He can't, he admits - he literally can't! Olive helps him to his feet, then again tries to make light of the situation by pretending she's just realized it was all a joke after all. She bets he's done it to "all of them - Emily, Phyllis..." "No offense meant," Percy says, playing along half-heartedly. "None taken," says Olive. "You shan't tell anyone about this, will you?" No, no, he agrees. Now, Olive would like to go to the Rovers - shall they? Emily will probably be there, won't she? Percy is unable to pretend nothing's happened, however, and sits heavily on the sofa. He'd rather not, if she doesn't mind. Olive anxiously asks if she's said anything to offend him. No, replies the old soldier, taking off his glasses - it's just a bit of something making his eyes water, that's all. She thanks him for a lovely evening and kisses him on the cheek. "Goodbye, Mrs. Clarke," says Percy.

Doug is outside the Duckies' trying to get the van going. Jack and Vera look on dubiously from their doorway. The engine finally catches, to everyone's relief. "I'll miss you, Vera," Doug says warmly before driving off. Vera frets to Jack - does he think they're doing the right thing, letting Doug go like that, without a proper roof over his head? Jack is sure, all right! Then they watch in astonishment as he only drives as far as MVB Motors and parks the van again! "Cheeky devil!" gasps Vera. "Never mind," says Jack pragmatically. "It's Baldwin's problem now. Come on in!"

Down the street, Percy stands heartbreakingly straight and tall in his Legion jacket as he sees Olive off. She turns to wave at him, he waves back sadly. Emily and Deirdre have just left the Rovers, and Emily, seeing Olive leaving already, knows that things didn't go as expected. She goes for coffee with Deirdre, giving Mr. Sugden some time. In the house, Percy symbolically throws the potpourri in the trash and turns out the light before closing the dining room door and heading to bed alone.

Well, that's your lot! ronniecat =^..^=

Harry Potts: RUSSELL DIXON Olive Clarke: JOAN SCOTT Hanif Ruparell: AYUB KHAN DIN
Written by FRANK COTTRELL BOYCE Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Wednesday (3538, Friday 7 May 1993)

Emily steps outside to retrieve the morning milk, and seems surprised to find Percy in the living room when she goes back inside. She tells him that she had intended to let him sleep in, but Percy rather disconsolately responds that sleeping-in is not for him. Emily is eager to have details of the previous evening, but Percy tells her that if she's referring to his plans for Mrs. Clarke, there'll be no wedding bells. "I'm sorry," says Emily quietly, adding that she really thought they were made for each other.

Kevin bangs on Doug's camper-van and eventually an unkempt Doug emerges, coughing, scratching, and wondering what time it is. Kevin isn't pleased that the van is parked in MVB motors' tiny lot, and Doug pleads with him that he had to find somewhere to park it. "Shift it!" is Kevin's curt instruction, adding that the clapped-out vehicle is hardly an advertisement for the garage, and that he should be happy that Baldwin hasn't seen it there. Instead of moving it, though, Doug heads for the mens room to brush his teeth and have a wash.

Back at Emily's, Percy apparently decides not to give full details of his humiliation of the night before. Instead, he tells her that he and Olive have a "special" kind of friendship, and there's no point in changing that. As things are, he explains, they know where they are with each other, and aren't trying to replace someone that can't be replaced. They'll continue to see each other as friends, he notes somewhat sadly, and that's for the best; there'll be no false hopes that way. Sensing that Percy is putting things in the best possible light, Emily offers to make a fresh pot of tea, leaving Percy to stare off into space, perhaps pondering what might have been.

Alf stands outside his shop, giving it a loving once-over, and does the same when he steps inside. He admits to Audrey that it hasn't quite sunk in yet that they'll be selling up and moving on -- the shop was a big part of his life. Audrey understands that, but also feels that there are other adventures to be appreciated in retirement. Meanwhile, Alf reiterates again to Audrey that he doesn't want anyone hearing about this news until they're ready to make the announcement. "Folk will find out soon enough," he says just as Deirdre walks through the door. As Alf and Audrey suddenly fall into silent, Deirdre senses that something's up, but instead of responding to her question, Alf tersely whispers "not one word," to Audrey.

At the Kabin, Mavis is going on about Doug's camper-van, characterizing it (among other things) as a "health hazard." Just when she thought they were going to be shut of the thing, he only moved it around the corner, she moans. Mavis' whinging is interrupted by Neil, who is repairing the water-damaged back room. He wants to know if anyone else would like a cuppa, and Rita teases him that that's his third cup that morning. In response to Rita's question on how much longer the repairs will take, Neil responds that it will be at least a few more days. His discussion with Rita is interrupted by Denise, who asks if they have a birthday card that would be appropriate for her 12-year-old nephew. While Rita helps her make a selection, she wonders if Denise could squeeze her in that day for a hair appointment, but Denise's response is "not a chance." Rita is amazed that business is that brisk, but Denise giggles and tells her that she's going to be busy with someone who is "tall, dark, and incredibly handsome." A disgusted Neil takes all this in before disappearing into the back.

In the Corner Shop, Deirdre and Audrey tease Jim about his dapper clothes, and he responds that this will be his "uniform" in the future. He and Liz are beginning their training at the White Swan that day, he explains, so Deirdre and Audrey both wish him the best of luck. After he leaves, Deirdre notes that it's nice to see someone with something to look forward to in their life. "Yes," says Audrey, with a strange lilt to her voice, prompting Deirdre to ask what's up -- "you've been smiling like a Cheshire cat all morning!" Audrey ("wild horses couldn't drag it from me") ponders for only a few seconds before saying "what the heck... if anyone has the right to know, you do."

Outside, Alf is in his vehicle, preparing to go somewhere, and is unhappy to find Doug trying to manoeuvre the camper into a space in front of the shop. For the second time that morning, Doug is told unceremoniously to "shift it."

Neil announces that he's off for a bite of lunch, and Mavis decides to take her lunch break as well. Rita wonders if she's off to the Rovers Return, because if so, she'd love to hear any details of Denise's new love interest, but Mavis sniffs that she's going home, where she can admire their garden. Outside, Mavis stops in her tracks and utters "OH, NO, I can't believe it," when she sees the camper-van parked in front of her home.

Doug, meanwhile has retired to the Rovers Return, where he is being served hot-pot by Betty and complaining about all the negative vibes he's been getting over the van. Betty hasn't much sympathy to offer, though, adding that he can't blame folk for getting upset. Doug moans that he'd get shut of the thing if he could just find another place to sleep.

Harry Potts smarms his way into the pub, and Bet immediately offers him a free pint while asking if there's any more information on the road-widening scheme. Potts goes all conspiratorial, letting on that this is "top secret," so Bet is to keep her voice down.

Mavis charges into the pub, looking for Doug, and demands to know what he thinks he's up to, parking "that thing, that eyesore," outside her home. "It can't stop there," she informs him, but as far as Doug is concerned, he has no choice. "It's an eyesore," shreiks Mavis, who accuses Doug of seeing the situation as just "one big joke." Doug remonstrates that if someone would give him a room, he'd gladly push it to the nearest scrap yard. Mavis reiterates that he'd better get it moved, before walking off in disgust. As an afterthought, Doug calls out to her that he understands she has a spare room. Mavis is NOT amused.

Emily clears the table after lunch, noting that Percy didn't each much of his. Percy mumbles that he wasn't hungry, and in an attempt to lift his spirits, Emily suggests that the two of them have an outing that afternoon. "No thanks," Percy responds glumly. Emily goes on brightly about the joys of owning her own vehicle and doesn't understand why Percy wouldn't jump at the chance to see some new scenery, but Percy only mutters that he doesn't want to be a burden. Sensing that he may not want her company, Emily suggests that if Percy would like to go out in her car by himself, he's certainly welcomed to do that. Percy reminds her that it's been years since he was last behind the wheel, so needs a refresher course -- but where on earth would he get the money for lesson? Emily helpfully offers to teach him herself -- "and if you're going to tell me you can't do it, I won't believe you!" Percy thoughtfully replies that "it's not a question of whether I could do it or not is it? It's if I'd want to. That's summat I'd have to think about. Hmmm.." Seeing that he's taking the bait, Emily smiles happily to herself.

Back at the Rovers Return, Neil scowls as he watches Denise and Hanif, who are clearly enjoying an intimate moment. Hanif wants Denise to close the beauty shop for the day and spend the afternoon with him, but Denise tells him she couldn't do that without at least a few days notice. Instead, she offers to cook him a meal that evening in her flat.

Over at the Corner Shop, Gail has stopped by with a list of groceries she needs, and tells Audrey that Martin will pick them up later. Audrey insists that Alf can bring them across, adding that Gail may as well take advantage of the service while she can. When Gail wonders what her mom means by that, Audrey ("it will never go beyond me") tsks and announces that she promised Alfie... but surely her own daughter has a right to know.

Neil has sulked his way home and is the picture of gloom when Angie arrives. She's surprised to find him home so early, and Neil explains that there's nothing else he can do in the Kabin until the plaster dries. He hasn't even started their tea, and when Angie asks if something is wrong, he explains that it has to do with her boss -- he saw Hanif with Denise at lunch. Angie glibly observes that the pair must be getting serious, and wonders what Neil's problem is. "*He's* the problem" Neil moans. "Not again!" Angie says in utter exasperation, reminding him that everytime he sees Denise with Hanif, he "throws a wobbler." "You don't like your ex to be with another fella'," Angie realizes, and points out that while it's okay for her and Neil to be living together, it isn't alright for Denise to be with another man. "If that's not jealousy, what the heck would you call it?" she asks before slamming her way out of the flat.

Rita joins Audrey and Alf at their table in the pub, and after Alf gets the drinks in, Rita toasts the pair, hoping that their retirement will be a happy one. Alf is taken aback and turns to Audrey, reminding her that he thought they were going to keep the announcement quiet for now. Audrey defends herself on the grounds that Rita is a good friend, but really puts her foot in when she lets it slip that he needn't worry because Deirdre promised not to whisper it to a soul. "Who else?" wonders Alf in amazement, and Andrey confesses that Gail has been informed too. "What's the point?" sighs Alf, and seeing that he can't win, goes to the bar and tells Bet their good news. Rita apologizes to Audrey, hoping she hasn't dropped her in it, but Audrey only laughs and tells her that she's actually done her a favour. "He's not likely to go back on his word now, is he?"

Liz and Jim MacDonald are busy serving the punters at the White Swan while Stella Rigby retrieves a roll of £1 coins from the back. Seconds later, Harry Potts leaves a trail of slime as he oozes into the pub, and after ordering a pint, enquires about Stella's whereabouts. Stella appears at that moment, and announces that Harry's drink is on the house. She too wonders about the "road-widening scheme," and it's beginning to become crystal clear that Potts is telling at least one of the landladies a lie. "You can rely on me for information" he declares, whereupon Stella insists that he avail himself of her flat, where he can enjoy his pint with his feet up. Liz and Jim exchange puzzled glances as Potts disappears into the back.

Derek nearly knocks Mavis over when he roars into the Kabin, fit to be tied that Doug's camper-van is parked in front of his home. He demands to know why Mavis hasn't done something about the situation, but Mavis can only stammer that there's nothing she can do.

Returning to the Rovers Return, Curly buys Reg a drink, but when he places it in front of him, there's no response. Curly sarcastically thanks himself ("Oh, thank you Norman") but Reg is clearly in a grand funk. "You've been like a zombie all day" Curly observes, and Reg wonders what anyone could expect of him, given that he's lost "the love of his life." He reminds Curly that it's been a week since his "humiliation" over the waterbed, and Curly seems genuinely surprised, thinking that Reg had gotten over the situation by now. "NO, I've *NOT* got over it," Reg snaps back, and Curly wonders if part of that is Reg's own fault, since he hasn't been in touch with Maureen since then. "What can I do?" wails Reg, to which Curly replies that the least he can do is go and tell her how much he loves her. When Reg wonders what he'll do if she slams the door in his face, Curly points out that he'll be no worse off than he is now.

Derek finds Doug in the Rovers Return, and insists that the camper-van be moved, NOW! Doug tries to explain that he has no choice, because the engine is shot and the vehicle won't start. Derek doesn't care though, and tells him to either move it or get someone else to move it for him. If not, Derek has every intention of involving the police, hinting that he rather doubts that Doug has the required MOT licence, insurance, and certification that the vehicle is road worthy. Realizing that he's been backed into a corner, Doug agrees that he'll move the thing, but not until the following morning. "Be reasonable," he pleads, and Derek relents, agreeing that he'll tolerate the van for one night -- "but if that heap is still there first thing in the morning, you know what to expect." After Derek leaves, Doug turns to Bet, wondering where he'll "stick" the van, and Bet predictably replies "you don't expect me to tell you that, do you? Although I can think of plenty of folk who would." As a desperate Doug pushes his plate away, Bet wonders if there's something wrong with his meat pie -- "you seem to have lost your appetite all of a sudden."

Heather Morlan

Harry Potts: RUSSELL DIXON Hanif Ruparell: AYUR KHAN DIN Stella Rigby: VIVIENNE ROSS
Written by BARRY HILL Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Thursday (3539, Monday 10 May 1993)

Uh oh. Doug is trying to get one over on Derek by removing the tires of the van before anyone is up for the day. He sneaks them down the street, with the only one stirring at this hour being the milk truck.

In the Rovers, Bet, Betty and Raquel have tea before their day begins. They chat about leering butchers and when Liz will be back to work at the Rovers., Betty having had to take on all the cooking day and evening in the meantime. Raquel offers to help though she's no experience in the kitchen. Still she's optimistic that she could do it. They often told her in school she'd be equally good at anything she tried. Bet looks at her incredulously. "Raquel, they used to say," Raquel reminisces "You have no particular talents. I could turn me hand to anything, me!" Bet offers that Raquel should stick to bar work.

Oh My! The "For Sale" sign is being posted over the corner shop. Ken passes by and believes it's a mistake.

Doug has Derek convinced that a thief or thieves spirited all four tires away while she slept "like a corpse" inside the van over night. Derek insists Doug shift it somehow, "Call a scrap yard, parcel it up in a cube, post it to Chelmsford...Just MOVE IT!!"

One worry put to bed, Rita tells Mavis that her insurance will cover all the damage costs from the flood. Derek arrives, flustered and ranting and somehow ends up praying for rain so a flood can float away the van to Mount Ararat, never mind the animals 2 by 2 he implores God, Just take Doug Murray and he'll even spring for the olive branch! Mavis and Rita's faces speak volumes without a word said. Has Derek finally gone round the pipe?? (oh i do hope so, he always wanted to travel... oh sorry, oblique Shirley Valentine reference! It just slipped out)

Ivy comes into the Bettabuys staff room to find Curly. Maureen is in the locker room and wants to see him. Ivy confides that Maureen is upset and has been crying. Faced with consoling an emotional female, Curly resists but does what he has to do and nervously approaches a door. Opening it, he finds Maureen sniffling, sitting on a low chair (now here the "locker room" looks no bigger than the toilet but later it looks as large as a school room. Perhaps she was sitting (clothed) in the loo?) She wants her leaving paper work, could Curly get it for her? Curly tries to convince her to go to Reg as he really does want to see her but she doesn't want to see him so Curly slopes off with a sigh to seek out the documents.

Neil has presented his bill to Rita, rather unprofessionally scribbled on a piece of torn and crumpled paper. If the insurance company has a problem, they can ring him for confirmation. He comes out of the back room where Denise is buying a magazine and makes a snarky remark to her about Hanif. She retains her dignity, glares at him and leaves.

Audrey is delighted to see the "for Sale" sign up but inside, when Emily gushes that she and Alf will be able to spend all the time they want together, her face falls and a false smile is pasted on. After a morning of dragging Alf round the wallpaper shops, all this togetherness suddenly seems a bit less attractive, i would say.

Don tries to advise Doug to shift the van. Some of the smugness falters briefly when Kevin points out the similarity of tires he's found under the arches to the ones formerly on Doug's van. Too bad there's only three left and are slashed. Whew! Emily is celebrating the fact that she wont' be prosecuted over that incident with Vera and the car (so that means Vera won't be either?). She and Deirdre have a chuckle over Emily's decidedly unchristian thoughts towards Percy. Emily's glad she has the car so that she can escape now and then and though she's sad he won't be leaving, at least can be pleased that Mrs. Clark won't be saddled with him!

Curly can't find the documents Maureen needs, speculating that they must be in Reg's breast pocket close to his heart. This of course starts Maureen weeping again. Curly awkwardly spouts a few cliches to console her and nearly has her convinced to talk to Reg until he compares the ups and downs of life to a waterbed. She howls with renewed energy and flees the room only to bump into Reg. She smacks him across the chest and takes off, with him hot on her heels.

Neil encounters Denise outside her shop door, lurking around i believe for just this purpose. She gives him Hell for talking to her in such an insulting manner in the Kabin that morning and he gets his own back by implying that she is only one of many of Hanif's birds.

Derek approaches Alf in the pub about the rust bucket (Boo-Kay? LOL). Poor Alf moans about never being able to have a drink in peace and looking forward to the future when he wont' be mithered by everyone for this and that. He puts Derek off to Harry Potts who is the one responsible for traffic concerns. Derek goes away in disgust. Over in a booth, Ivy is wittering and simpering to Don because they are having a civil drink together, hoping to wile her way back into his good graces. Don bluntly points out they are not a couple and welcomes Reg's self invitation to sit with them. Ivy smirks like the cat with the cream when Reg infers that the Brennans are a happily married couple.

Denise has come to Onyx to meet Hanif for their date. The factory is quiet. Denise is obviously bothered by what Neil said and makes a leading reference to Hanif surrounded by "friendly" female staff. He correctly picks up that someone is spreading rumours, which is says are not true. His golden rule of business is never to mess with the workforce. Denise denies his speculation that the rumour came from Angie but he raises a calculating eyebrow...maybe not *directly* from her.

Reg is faced, absolutely paralytically legless and tunelessly singing a song in the pub. Bet cuts off his alcohol supply professionally handling his slurred ramblings about star crossed lovers. Harry Potts makes a remark about waterbeds that gets Reg's dander up and Curly has difficulty dragging him away and out the door before his false bravado gets him into worse shape. Harry turns around and manages to get yet another free pint from Bet, launching into a rousing speech about the traffic controllers making changes leading to the ruin of the youth and destruction of the earth, held in check only by the little man. They will widen Rosamund Street over his political dead body, he concludes. I thought for a minute he was going to sing Rule Brittania for an encore! Bet is sucked in and full of admiration for her ally.

Poor Reg has to bunk out on the sofa, now his bed has sunk into Davy Jones' Locker. Curly is attempting to pour coffee and water into him as he pathetically slobbers into his pillow about lost love. Curly leaves Reg pledging to persist in the pursuit of his princess on the morrow.

Diane Johnston

Hanif Ruparell AYUB KHAN DIN Harry Potts RUSSELL DIXON Workman DUFFY MARSHALL
Written by STEPHEN MALLATRATT Directed by ROMEY ALLISON

Friday (3540, Wednesday 12 May 1993)

Resplendent in boxers, half-open shirt, mismatched socks, and flat cap askew, Doug shows up at Des' door desperate to use the facilities. Not only is he welcomed, but Des invites him to shower and stay for breakfast! He goes so far as to say he would offer his spare room if he weren't in the process of flogging the place. Never mind though - Doug is just happy to be treated like a human being for a change, more than he's had from most around here!

Next door, Derek stops peering out the window long enough to report to Mavis: "That Des Barnes is *encouraging* him!" She scolds Derek for his lack of charity but he is quick to point out the message this sort of thing is liable to send. "When word gets around, we'll have new-age travelers parked up and down the street!" he gasps. In that case, retorts Mavis, he'd do well to DO something about the problem instead of giving her a "mouthful of earache!"

Over their morning cuppa, Betty and Raquel have a lazy conversation on the question of marriage. Raquel is feeling a bit gloomy about her chances, guessing she won't have a ring on her finger before she's 30. Betty gives her a word of encouragement - she's young yet, she should enjoy her freedom while she has it. She adds that she was 29 when she married her Cyril, "But it were different in them days..." When Raquel asks if Betty would have still married "her Cyril" if she'd been permitted to sleep with other men, Betty gropes for words before replying with an embarrassed smile, "We were very happy, you know".

Raquel drifts into talking about how she'd like her wedding to be - "bridesmaids in pale blue if it's summer, dark blue if it's winter, with matching muffs". (She's always had a "thing" for muffs, Raquel.) Betty rhetorically wonders what colour the napkins will be and Raquel answers without hesitation, "Peach - to match me roses... Me bouquet will be peach roses and white freesia". Her children's names will be Tiffany and Blake. She's got it all worked out, you see, all but who the groom will be... Betty asks about her footballer but Raquel answers wistfully, "Wayne doesn't like talking about the future - he's very superstitious!" She muses for a moment about the "irony" of Angie having a good job and a live-in boyfriend - despite the fact that "she's no Michelle Pfieffer"!

Off to Leicester, Hanif catches Angie on his way out to say he'd like a word with her when he gets back. His sharp tone indicates his irritation but he refuses to tell her what's upset him other than to make mention of her "disloyalty"!

In the Corner Shop, Emily asks if Alf has had any interest in the shop yet. Deirdre jokes that she hopes to be one of the fixtures and fittings when it does sell so she'll know what she'll have a job in the future! She says she's even been to the bank to look into the possibility of purchasing it herself but unless Alf is prepared to bring his asking price down by £50 grand, it's not on. Audreh pops in to announce that she's "kidnapping" Alf for an hour. Despite his protests, accompanied by smirks and giggles from Deirdre and Emily, she succeeds in getting him out the door.

On Nightingale Street, Reg patiently waits in his car with a huge bouquet on his lap. Catching sight of his beloved Maureen in the rearview mirror, he hops out to intercept her as she walks up the street. As he approaches and calls out her name, she stops in her tracks and looks half-ready to turn heel. But as he comes closer, he trips and falls flat on his face. She stops and looks pityingly down on him... "Oh - Reg!" she smiles in spite of herself.

In the Rovers, Doug is sounding Betty and Phyllis out on the idea of taking in a lodger - him. Betty excuses herself on the basis that her cat, Marmaduke, is "allergic to strangers" and Phyllis muses that she may have her "toy boy" back soon - now that Mrs. Olive Clarke has dumped Percy!

From their table, Mavis whitters to Emily about Doug, complaining that he's no right to be smiling in his situation, bankrupt and homeless. Emily counters that he's to be commended, being able to smile "in the face of adversity"!

Angie pops in for a brew on her lunch hour and meets Des' friendly greeting with a sour face and a gripe about her boss. From behind the bar, Raquel overhears and comments to Betty that she thinks she jinxed Angie by talking about her earlier. She goes over to offer a sympathetic ear but Angie snaps that she's done quite enough already in the pinching boyfriends department! Raquel counters that she isn't interested in Neil, Angie's "chippy" as she calls him. "I happen to have a meaningful relationship with a major sports personality!" she sniffs before walking away. Des gently chides Angie for taking out her troubles on poor Raquel and advises her that if she's done nothing wrong she has nowt to worry about!

Reg has arrived back on the Street with Maureen by this time. Limping from his fall, she escorts him from his car to his apartment, letting him lean on her for support as he yelps in pain with every step.

In the Corner Shop again, Deirdre now complains to Phyllis about being taken for granted. Alf and Audreh have been gone over three hours and she doesn't know why she bothers staying for what the takings have been in that time! Ken comes in to inquire how Alf's selling might affect his tenancy but Deirdre thinks he has nothing to worry about as a sitting tenant. Mike happens in and is only too ready to take the p*ss out of his nemesis, suggesting that *he* might be interested in becoming a shop-owner. Ken stalks out in disgust, leaving Deirdre to chastise Mike: "You've no more intention of buying this place than taking violin lessons!" Mike chuckles in agreement but says it was worth the look on Ken's face.

Curly calls up at Reg's flat to see where he's been. Finding him limping around with a bandaged knee, he susses that Reg has been vying for sympathy from "Nurse Maureen". As Reg tries desperately to shush him, Curly laughs about Reg's craftiness, faking injury to get his lady-love to come up and tend to him. Suddenly Maureen appears from the kitchen where she's evidently been preparing a meal for them. Angered by Curly's suggestion, she rips off her apron and storms from the flat over Reg's pleading protests.

Des' is showing his prospective buyers around the house, a Mr. and Mrs. Wilke. He does all the talking while his wife flushes the toilet to make sure it runs "like Niagara Falls". Because of their non-committal demeanour, Des isn't sure whether they're actually impressed by what they see. As they leave, Mr. Wilke promises to let him know "soon"...

Back from his business trip to Leicester, Hanif summons Angie to her office for a word about her "excessively large mouth". She has no idea what's bothering him until he accuses her of spreading tales about his using the factory girls as his "personal harem". She suddenly twigs that Neil must have said something and tries to explain. "I might have said that some of the girls fancy you, which is true...." Hanif jumps to the conclusion that she must also "fancy" him and that her jealousy is what inspired her gossip! Angie denies the charge but Hanif warns her sharply - she's good at her job but if she continues to "embroider" his private life with her "pathetic fantasies", she'll be out!

Finally back from her "hour-long" excursion with Alfeh, Audreh sits in the Rovers telling Emily all about their house-hunting. She raves about the sunken tub and "his and hers" dressing rooms in one of the homes they looked at. Emily comments that it sounds lovely and ventures to ask what the kitchen was like... "The kitchen?" Audreh echoes blankly - "Oh, it were nice too..."

Gordon Blinkhorn pops in to the pub to see his "little friend" Raquel. Happy to see a friendly face, she gets his drink with a smile but evades his inquiry when he asks after her "superstar" boyfriend.

Derek arrives home and is disappointed to find Mavis preparing cod in cheese sauce for their evening meal - he had fish for lunch at the school cafeteria today. She sarcastically offers to check her menu against the school's in future but the remark flies over Derek's head as he begins a rant about the "lunatic next door". Apparently, he's done some checking with the council by now and is assured it's only a question of time before the eyesore van is removed - approximately six weeks' time, "If we're lucky!" "Six weeks!" Mavis repeats in shock. "If we're lucky!" Derek sniffs in defeat.

Maureen returns to Reggie's flat to apologize for her outburst earlier. He's overjoyed that she's come back and as they sit down to talk, he tells her how hurt he was that she could think even for a moment that he would deceive her. She says she is sorry, she was silly to believe it, it's all the ups and downs they've had - she can't think straight. Reg nods in sympathy but is taken aback when she continues. She didn't want it to end this way - on a sour note. She wants them to be friends as they part ways! He's baffled at why they should part at all - after all, they are "soul mates"! As he gets down on his good knee, he pleads, "Maureen - we can't fly in the face of destiny!" To her utter dismay, he proposes marriage.

Raquel finds a sympathetic ear in Gordon and confesses she doesn't know what to think about her Wayne. She isn't allowed to call him at the clubhouse and the signals she's been getting have been hot and cold - she is genuinely confused about where she stands with him. Gordon cordially offers to take her around to Weatherfield Comprehensive the next day, where Wayne will be having a coaching session with the school boys. She considers for a moment whether he'd welcome her turning up but Gordon insists he'd be delighted to show off his pretty girlfriend to the lads and she happily agrees.

Mike joins Deirdre at the bar and offers to buy her a drink to make up for upsetting her earlier. She demands to know if his remorse extends to offering Ken an apology but told not to hold her breath, she refuses his offer and leaves him to drink alone.

Elsewhere in the pub, Des tells Curly and Phyllis that the Wilkes have made an offer so it looks like he won't be long for the neighbourhood. Phyllis regrets losing him but Curly jokes that he's only moving locally, not going to Mars. Des chimes in with, "Not yet, any road", but turns serious again to reflect that his house has brought him only ill luck and he'll be glad to leave it behind...

Home from her trying day at the office, Angie lights into Neil about his indiscriminate remarks to Denise about Hanif's love life. He becomes defensive, saying he was only "joking" but she lashes out that he took an innocent remark of hers and twisted it to suit his own purposes. She stresses that this folly nearly cost her her job and he relents that he may have said something he shouldn't have but excuses himself on the basis that Hanif is not to be trusted. Angie is seething by now - "Denise can look after herself! Anyway, it would be the same no matter who it was!" she charges.

In Reg's flat, he is now sitting beside his intended, pleading for her to make up for the lost years they've endured by becoming his wife. She does love him, she confesses. "And I love you, Maureen..." he returns. Throwing her arms around his neck, she finally agrees to become Mrs. Reg Holdsworth. As they happily embrace, her face saddens as she recalls their only problem - her mother. Cue the closing music as his face also clouds with the recognition that they yet have Maud Grimes to contend with...

Anita Bélanger

Gordon Blinkhorn: MARK CHATTERTON Mr. Wilke: MALCOLM SCATES
Written by ADELE ROSE Directed by ROMEY ALLISON


Originally transmitted: 14, 17, 19, 21 & 24 May 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 8 - Friday 12 May 2000
Episode Numbers: 3541 - 3545

Monday (3541, Friday 14 May 1993)

Des plays a blinder, Maud gets told, Percy gets taught a lesson.

Derek moans and whinges, blathers and rants - you know the drill. All because he's seen Des bring breakfast out to Doug on a tray. He's all for confronting Des for taking sides but Mavis warns him off. She's tired of fighting with the neighbours (and tired of his obsessions!) The van will leave sooner or later, just leave it be, she implores as she runs off to work.

Let's see who else is pouting and snivelling - Oh, Neil. Just because Angie told him off and is angry with him because he was jealous of Denise's new fella, Neil now tries a little emotional blackmail, threatening not to bother coming back tonight at all. She doesn't say it so I will. Stop being so childish, Neil!!! He leaves and she sighs in frustration.

Of course Derek wastes no time going crying on Des's doormat. Des refuses to play ball and Derek is further appalled when Des allows Doug to use the facilities. But the deeper Derek sticks his nose in, the more Des's jaw is set, angry at Derek interfering and telling him how to run his life. Derek pushes too far when he accuses Des of thinking life is one big laugh which, at least in recent history, we all know Des does not. Des makes a decision and tells Derek he'll sort out Doug and have the van moved by the end of the day which thrills Dirk the Jerk right down to his little striped socks!

In the Kabin, Reg makes leading remarks about wedding planning magazines, sparking Rita's interest but he won't go into detail. Derek scampers in crowing in triumph now that the van will be moved. Since he has to go, can Mavis monitor the situation for him? He runs back out. Honestly, Mavis vents, my husband and his obsessions! Never mind that, Rita butts in, there are more important things to worry about such as to do you suppose Reg is going to marry? (Reg is gone now) Mavis all but stamps her feet and, pulling a lip, firmly states that she might be available before very long!

Emily tells Deirdre she's giving Percy his driving lesson today and rather wonders if she's going to regret it. Kevin gets a chuckle out of it as well, offering to disable the car for her.

Ivy and Curly spy Reg and Maureen tripping the tinned veg aisle fantastic and speculate on the current status of things. Shortly, they are put out of some of their curiosity when Reg announces that Maureen is coming back to work at Bettabuys. A bit of business first and Maureen passes him a set of keys. That in itself should clue them about the pair's reunion but all Curly can do is sulk about undoing paperwork. Reg makes a few remarks that make it apparent that he's a man with a mission, mounting an offence against Darth Vader and the Deathstar by the way he's going on. You know how he does! LOL! The two of them bat eyelashes and simper as Reg makes his way, leaving Ivy to help Maureen get settled in again. "Love is lovelier the second time around" is the song that's playing over the store's PA system! I love those little touches, don't you?

Percy takes great pleasure in ordering a non- (or low) alcohol beer, telling everyone within hearing range why (he's driving this afternoon!) Denise is consulted as the only near-expert in the workings of Neil's mind. She's heard it all before, as she listens to Angie vent, and tells her exactly what will happen. He'll stand in the doorway like a little boy lost and say "So what's it to be, are we still on or wot?" Over at the bar, Doug buys Kevin and Des a drink. Des offers Doug room and board until the house is sold if he lets Des take possession of the van. Doug jumps at the chance. Methinks Des has a plan and your mind works the way mine does, they you'll have already figured this one out. Elsewhere Gordon comes to fetch Raquel and take her to the local school where Wayne is going to be making an appearance and playing some footie with the kids. But she can't leave just yet as they're still busy so Gordon has a drink to wait. Why do I think Gordon is trying to show Raquel the error of Wayne's ways?

In an absolutely cracking great scene, Reg gets to confront Maud. We open with Maud dozing in her chair in the sitting room. Startled, she hears someone let themselves in the door. It's Reg of course, using Maureen's keys. He straightens his tie and his resolve and prepares to face the dragon, full of determination. For once he's deadly serious and not even twitching, not so's you'd notice anyway. He explains to Maud that not only are he and Maureen back together but they are going to get married. Maud is rude and beligerent and insulting as usual but he pushes his point. He knows why Maud doesn't want them to get married. "Because you're not suited" Maud states. Oh they're remarkably well suited, Reg contradicts. "She's worth seven of you" Maud points out. That may be, he agrees but it's not the point. The point is, Maud is afraid of being left alone. She's gotten used to Maureen looking after her. "Looking after me? Who do you think looks after her!" Well, Reg sighs, Nobody at all but he intends to. He proposes that Maureen will still be able to look after her mother after the wedding and no, it's not because he thinks Maud has money to leave her daughter. Reg is relentless in his attack, calmly but firmly stating that it's not about money, it's about love. He suggests she recognize it if only for her own benefit. Maud's face is now more uncertain, slowly realizing that she can't bully him anymore. He tells her in no uncertain terms that if she continues to try to break them up, he'll take Maureen away and she will be left alone. But it won't he his or Maureen's fault, oh no, it will be HER fault as it will be her choice. Does she understand? She ppers at him wordlessly, face now reflecting a deeper fear and defeat. Good. And he leaves her. Alone.

Doug is emptying his things into cases and boxes just as Percy is giving the car a once over inspection before his lesson. Starting as he means to go on, he gives Emily her driving orders by making sure she remembers to buckle her seat belt when she gets in.

Mavis, peering through the blinds, tells Rita and Denise that Doug seems to be moving his things into Des's house. Maybe Des really is getting rid of that dreadful monstrosity. Doug or the van, cracks Denise. She and Rita tease Mavis a bit though Mavis as usual doesn't see what's so funny and frets.

Gordon and Raquel arrive, too late to see Wayne play but just in time to see him packing up a car along with the help of a leggy blonde. Serena she's called, according to Gordon. She works at the football club and drives the players around sometimes. Why can't they drive themselves, Raquel wonders. Well they just seem to prefer her to do it. Hands up who thinks this chick was exactly the reason Gordon suggested this little outing in the first place!? Seems to have had the desired effect and Raquel quietly asks to be taken back to the pub.

Reg gives Maureen back her keys and pulls her off her cashier station to let her know that he has accomplished his mission. He outlines what he told Maud, answering Maureen's worried question that Maud didn't say anything. He left her there to think on it and then takes Maureen off for a cuppa while Curly and Ivy lurk in the background, still wondering if Reg and Maureen are indeed back together. (no balloon lips yet on Ivy, I've been on the lookout!)

Angie is unpacking groceries when Neil gets home. He stands there, in the doorway, looking properly chastened. Rather like a little boy lost in fact. Angie holds her breath and waits for it. "So, ah, what's it to be? We still on or wot?" Angie can't hold back a giggle but covers and says she just thought of something funny she heard earlier today (not a lie either! Lol) seeing as she's shopped for two, he might as well say, she says, yeah, they're still on.

Derek marches into the pub, somewhat disappointed as the van is still outside his door. His demeanor is imporoved somewhat when Mavis reports that Doug's shifted his belongings. Bet quizzes Raquel on Wayne's "friend". Raquel admits she doesn't believe Serena was just driving Wayne but tries to give him the benefit of the doubt. Bet thinks Raquel ought to get hold of Wayne, somewhere where it hurts, and keep holding and squeezing until she gets some answers. Raquel moodily agrees she might have to do just that. Bet wonders if Raquel shouldn't get Gordon to do some investigating for her. Raquel thinks she might, at least she can trust Gordon. (Oooh er. That's the Phrase of Doom, innit?) Curly comes in and asks Derek if he's responsible for the crane that's outside. Derek excitedly realizes Des is having the van moved and wants to go outside and watch but Mavis won't let him. That might be perceived as gloating don't you think? Derek aquiesces to Mavis' good sense.

Outside the van is chained up while Doug and Des watch. Doug comments on the cost but to Des, it's only money. Doug makes a disparaging remark about having Derek as a neighbour. Well, Des is just going to leave Derek something to remember him by. The van lifts off. Up. . . up. . .up . . . and over . . .

Emily describes her driving lesson to Deirdre. She's come back with the distinct feeling that it was she that was given the lesson, Mr. Sugden having talked non stop and then congratulated her on a job well done at the finish! Reg shimmies into the pub and wants Curly to have a celebratory drink with him and announces he and Maureen are getting married. Even Bet is pleased though wonders if this Maureen needed her hearing checked. Reg offers to buy Rita a drink and Rita was going to avoid spending time with Reg until Bet insists, telling her the news. Rita is pleased (and relieved!) as well. Mavis and Derek decline as Derek gets light headed if he eats too late.

The Wiltons head across the road, revelling in the absence of the rubbish heap. Even the blocks that the van was sitting on are gone. Derek sings Des's praises to Mavis as they go inside the house. Mavis moves off camera into the kitchen as Derek continues his Des Fan Club speech until his words are cut off by a blood curdling anguished scream!!! He rushes into the kitchen where Mavis is barely holding herself together, staring horrified out the back window where the yellow shadow of a rusty van can be seen through the lace curtains.

They go outside. Derek moans Oh NO!!!! The skycam shows the van wedged in the front half of the garden, a knocked over birdhouse in its wake. "You WOULD go round there wouldn't you?" Mavis begins, "You WOULD insist. . . "

Diane Johnston

Gordon Blinkhorn MARK CHATTERTON Wayne Farrell RAY POLHIL Serena Black (didn't catch her name)
Written by PETER WHALLEY Directed by ROMEY ALLISON

Tuesday (3542, Monday 17 May 1993)

Derek and Mavis are still shell-shocked by the sight of the decrepit van in their garden. As if thumbing its mechanical nose at them, the van settles just a little more dejectedly and another bit falls off in the morning light. Derek's going to the Citizen's Advice Bureau, then the solicitor; they must do things carefully. If they do anything rash now they'll play right into Des and Doug's hands, he wisely notes. "Do something about it," says Mavis tearfully, "please!"

Next door Des prepares for work. After smugly noting that it was worth every penny it cost to put the van in the Wilton's yard, he urges the grimy-looking Doug to clean up himself and the house - the buyer, Mr. Wilkie, is coming by tonight to take some measurements. Doug snickers that he'll send him next door to ask for references from Mavis and Derek.

Outside the Mini Mart Reg chats with Alf about his retirement and asks him the price of the shop. The asking price of £73,000 gets a forced and exaggerated laugh from Reg as ridiculous for a "backstreet mini mart". Have their been any inquiries? he wonders. One or two, replies Alf, who is understandably defensive that his little gem is worth every penny of that price!

As Reg wanders away, Ivy enters the Mini Mart where Audrey is trying to encourage Deirdre to buy the place herself. Deirdre is laughing off the idea, noting that "loans have a nasty way of needing to be repaid", but Audrey reminds her that the income from the apartment would help. Deirdre finds that just as silly - her asking Ken every week to pay up! Get rid of him, then, says Audrey, or better yet Drear could sell her own house, move in to the apartment herself and start off with a much bigger lump sum. Deirdre says she'll "sleep on it" clearly not intending to, but Ivy, who has been eavesdropping intently on this exchange, has definitely had her interest piqued.

Liz and Bet chat over a morning cuppa at the Rovers. Liz muses about the type of pub she'd like to run but Bet pours cold water on her aspirations. Liz shouldn't set her sights too high, she warns. Without a trace of humour she reminds Liz that there's places like the Quarrymen's Rest, which just last year had to have its door widened so the ambulance could back right in. Someone has to run those places, too. "Are you trying to say something, Bet?" asks Liz. No, Bet says, she just doesn't want to see Liz and Jim disappointed - but her demeanour is decidedly frosty.

Reg and Maureen simper over each other at Bettabuys when Curly appears and raises the issue of an engagement party. We all wait in an agony of suspense until the pair decide that surprise, surprise, they'd like to have one at The Rovers :)

Mavis is waiting on Denise in the Kabin when Neil slopes in and asks for a birthday card for his nephew. [In a continuation of his remarkable age-regression, Neil is now wearing what appear to be some six-year-old boy's clothing - perhaps stolen off a clothes line? - consisting of a neat-o zippered hooded sweatshirt over a t-shirt, and a baseball cap worn backwards! I reckon by mid-April 1993 he'll be sucking his thumb.] As Denise starts to leave, he sarcastically "thanks" her for repeating what he told her to Hanif. "He gave Angie a right rollicking and she tore me half a strip!" he says. "I told you about Hanif in confidence!" "You told me about Hanif to put poison between us," spits Denise with narrowed eyes. "Well, if you thought I was going to brood about it in silence you were wrong!" Mavis looks unutterably uncomfortable. What Neil needs to do, Denise continues, is get it through his thick skull that "you and me are finished" - that, and "keep that excited little gob of yours SHUT!" With that she turns on her heel and walks out, leaving Mavis to flap a bit of coloured cardboard helplessly and sputter that "pop-up cards are very popular this year..."

Liz confides to Betty that she thinks Bet's angry with her, but can't understand why - she's just seeking the same opportunities Bet herself did. Betty assures her she's probably imagining it. Just then Bet appears and instructs Liz to go into the cellar and bring up a crate of sommat. Liz wants to wait until Jack returns in a few moments - he's the cellarman, and she's wearing her high heels, she laughs nervously. Again, Bet is humourless as she snaps that Liz will discover that she's going to have to be man *and* woman and be able to lug a crate up them cellar stairs and smile prettily at the top of them! Liz replies coldly that she'll do it - she wouldn't want anyone to think she was getting above her station! When she's gone, Betty gently chastises Bet, saying that Liz deserves this break - "Don't spoil it for her." Bet looks thoughtful.

Derek enters the shop and reports to Rita and the over-amped Mavis that he saw the solicitor. They have a good case, the solicitor thinks, but... they'll be lucky to get away with costs under a £1,000, and they have to win the case to recover those costs. In addition it'll be at least a month to get an order for Des to move the van. Rita makes sympathetic clucking noises. Mavis is distraught.

Reg calls Curly into his office at Bettabuys, and something big is up because not only is he having a drink but he pours Curly one too. It seems that Brendan Scott has called, and there are going to be redundancies. Curly asks anxiously if Reg knows who is going and he says he does not, but that Scott said no position was sacred. Each man frets that it could be himself and reassures the other that it won't be them. "It's bound to be me," wails poor Curly - "I must be the oldest Assistant Manager in the country!"

Derek is circling the offending object in the backyard when yet another bit of rusted metal falls off. Suddenly, we very nearly see the light bulb go on over his head. Dirk has an idea!

Reg breaks the news about the coming layoffs to Maureen. She tries to be optimistic, suggesting that since Bettabuys has a good redundancy package, perhaps if Reg is let go he could take the money and set up his own business. [And what a coincidence! Reg in the grocery biz and I just happen to know of a grocer's that's for sale!] She'd come work with him, she says, and they both quite warm to the idea. They agree that his redundancy mightn't be such a bad thing after all.

Mavis comes home from work and groans that "it's still there". Not for much longer, Derek chortles, appearing with a heavily-laden duffle bag. He's going to take care of it. "Derek, what do you have in that bag? It's not a gun, is it? You're not going to *kill* him!" says Mavis fearfully. [Laughed out loud at that, I really did.] No, this is better, says Derek, since killing is too good for Des Barnes. [Bloodthirsty for such a geeky little fellow, isn't he?] It's better, and legal!

Mr. Wilkie comes by with his measuring tape and Doug tells him about the nice neighbourhood, including the next-door neighbours. A nice middle-aged couple, no children, very respectable. Mr. Wilkie says that he has just one child himself. Des arrives and greets Mr. Wilkie, Doug goes to make tea, and everything is going along swimmingly. Wilkie inquires about the neighbourhood, mentioning that he is in particular concerned about noise for when they're trying to get the "little one" off to sleep. Des is waxing enthusiastic about the joys of the peaceful neighbourhood and the stalwart neighbours when the most god-awful, ear-splitting racket pierces the air. They rush to the backyard where all, including Mr. Wilkie, take in the astonishing sight of Derek in coveralls, orange sound protection earmuffs and safety goggles taking an electric saw to the decrepit hulk of the van while his mousy wife frets and peeps in the back doorway!

In the Rovers, Bet approaches Liz. She tells her she isn't angry about Liz moving on, but it was quite a surprise. Liz says she's sorry that Bet found out about it so abruptly - coming back from holiday to find Liz was leaving. Bet adds gently, "Liz - you deserve it, love." She then moves along to serve one Harry Potts, who's back in to collect another free drink in exchange for some more "vital information" about the fight to stop the widening of Rosamund Street and keep the world safe for the Rovers Return!

Gail and Ivy have a drink together and Ivy reveals that she's been mulling over the possibility of her and Don taking over the Mini Mart. She's worked there and knows the ropes, she points out. Ivy reveals she hasn't spoken to Don yet - she wanted to think it through herself first. Gail tells Ivy that if it's anything like running the Cafe it won't be easy, but Ivy says that her and Don's lives haven't been easy so far anyway, and they're not afraid of hard work.

Angie and Neil sit glumly at another table and discuss the fact that they don't have much to discuss. Neil suggests an early night, but Angie says that seems to be all they ever do, and isn't there more between them than "that"? Neil sniffs that he thought "that" was pretty fantastic, but Angie points out that they never talk about things, like books or ideas. Neil unintentionally sums up the whole of the difference in attitude between himself and Angie when he protests "You can *talk* to anyone - it's not anyone who can turn you on". [Didn't we see this coming ten miles away as soon as Angie got hooked up with this loutish lad? It's books and ideas *that do* turn her on, you prat!]

Reg and Maureen arrange with Bet to hold their engagement 'do' in the Rovers.

Stella Rigby (the landlady at the White Swan) comes into the pub to offer Liz a big bouquet of flowers as a sort of thank-you and a sort of apology for working her and Jim so hard. She happens to notice Harry Potts (who's been off spreading his own particular brand of sunshine elsewhere in the pub) leaving and tells Bet she didn't know he drank in here. Oh yes, Bet intimates - she's keeping well in with him. The Council is considering widening Rosamund Street and he's trying to stop it. It costs her the odd drink, mind, but it's worth it. Isn't that interesting? replies Stella, because Harry drinks in The White Swan too. Oh aye? Aye... 'cause they're thinking about widening Clarence Street and he's been working to stop it... "You don't say," says Bet coolly. "Looks like you and me have been taken for a pair of mugs, doesn't it?" observes Stella. [I have the feeling the only one who's going to end up with a handle coming out of his back is Harry Potts when these two get done with him!]

In Des Barnes' backyard things have deteriorated past the ridiculous. Derek is tossing pieces of the van over the fence as Des tries to carry on his conversation with Mr. Wilkie as if nothing out of the ordinary was happening. Doug scurries around helpfully, collecting the pieces of metal and rubber and glass and wire as they land and spiriting them away from Des and Wilkie. "What's he chucking it over the fence for?" asks Wilkie. "Ah - 'cause I said I'd help him with it," Des says lamely. "Be grateful it's not coming through your WINDOW!" Derek bellows, heaving a tire which nearly hits Doug. Mavis is fluttering around, quite beside herself, begging Derek to stop. "Evening, Mavis. How's the budgie?" Des asks pleasantly, adding to the incredulous Wilkie "Oh, great animal lovers, you know." Mr. Wilkie has seen enough. He thinks, he says, that he's "gotten a clear idea of what life in this house would be like. Now good evening!" Wilkie hurries away from the barmy bookie, the grungy guest and the lunatic neighbours [no doubt thinkihng something that contains the phrase 'near miss']. Des wears a pained expression, seeming to realize he brought his squarely on himself!

ronniecat

Harry Potts: RUSSELL DIXON Mr. Wilkie: MALCOLM SCATES Stella Rigby: VIVIENNE ROSS
Written by MARTIN ALLEN Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Wednesday (3543, Wednesday 19 May 1993)

Another morning on the street, and while Doug stuffs sandwiches into his face, an unhappy Des comes down the stairs, complaining about a lack of sleep. Doug thinks Des was awakened by the dawn chorus, but it was "Wilton" who kept him awake, carrying on with his mission of taking the van apart. Meanwhile, Des is also down in the dumps because Mr. Wilkie seemed keen on buying his place until Derek started his shenanigans. Not too tactfully, Doug points out that Des has only himself to blame, since it was his idea to put the van in Derek's back garden. He suggests that Des call Mr. Wilkie and try to explain things, but Des isn't interested. Doug insists it may be his only chance, and offers to fetch the telephone.

At the Corner Shop, Alf is in a stroppy mood, concerned about potential buyers, so gives Deirdre a hard time about not stacking tins of food in a straight line. Bet saunters in and asks Alf if he knows anything about the road-widening scheme, but a frazzled Alf, who is trying to serve several customers, claims he knows nowt about it. Bet presses her point, suggesting that the road-widening is a well-kept secret and is in fact the reason that Alf is selling his shop, but Alf swears again that he knows nothing about it.

On the telephone to Mr. Wilkie, Des explains that the situation yesterday was really just a "one-off." He insists that the Wiltons are "smashing neighbours," just the sort of family you'd want next door, but Wilkie seems not to be interested. A disillusioned Des rings off, only to have Doug tell him that he only made things worse for himself when he decided to get even with Derek.

At the Rovers Return, Bet asks Raquel what she knows about Serena, but Raquel in her inimitable naive way, insists that Serena is only there to drive the players around. She even believes that Serena had to undergo a lot of training to carry out her responsibilities, leaving Bet to roll her eyes in disbelief.

Ivy and Maureen stack shelves at Bettabuys while Maureen asks if Ivy will be able to attend their engagement party at the Rovers Return. Ivy reckons she'll be coming, for which Maureen is grateful as she confesses that she doesn't have many friends. Ivy thinks Maureen may well find herself attracting many new friends in the store, since she's now engaged to the store manager, and Ivy has heard that Brendan Scott will be coming in to discuss redundancies.

Meanwhile, Curly informs Reg that Brendan is going through staff rosters in his office. Instead of being nervous, though, Reg is full of himself, claiming that all one has to do when it comes to men like Brendan Scott is stay one step ahead of them.

It must be lunch time, because Doug is now at the Rovers Return, enjoying a pint with Don Brennan, who is wondering when Doug is going to find a place of his own. Doug replies that he had his own place until Derek Wilton got his hands on it, and claims he should sue him for "desecration" and for ruining his home. "The evidence is there for all to see."

Alf pops by on his way back to the shop and informs Bet that he's been down to the Council offices and spoke to everyone from the Mayor of Weatherfield all the way down to the local councillors, and absolutely no one knows anything about a road-widening proposal for Rosamund Street. "It's just not happening," he tells Bet -- "no one's going to widen anything."

Gordon arrives at the pub, looking for Raquel. There's a social going on at the club and he'd like her to come. When Raquel asks if Wayne will be there, Gordon claims that he'll be working the door, and specifically asked him to bring Raquel.

Back at the Corner Shop, Audrey excitedly tells Alf that the estate agent rang, and that a potential buyer for the shop will be by around 3:00 to view it.

In the offices of Bettabuys, Reg salutes Brendan Scott in a rather flippant way, but Brendan is not amused and drily suggests that Reg be seated. "You know we're restructuring... a bit of belt-tightening," he begins, but Reg suggests a more appropriate term might be "noose-tightening." Brendan goes on to explain that they're not advocating a mass exodus of employees, "just a few jobs." Reg tries to explain that he knows for a fact that every employee there cherishes their position, but Brendan fixes him with a steely stare and informs him that it's time that some of the middle management -- those whose paycheques have been automatically increased every year -- moved over and made way for new talent. "How long have you been with us?" he wonders.

Bet is about to use the telephone when Raquel comes down the stairs, ready for the social, wearing a tight coral dress with matching hair ornament. After Raquel rushes off, Bet calls Stella Rigby. "I've got news," she begins.

As they stroll through Bettabuys, Reg confides to Brendan that he has his own "hopes and aspirations," cleverly concealing that he has an alternate plan, should Brendan pull the rug from under him. More or less ignoring him, Brendan turns to Curly and informs him that it's always a pleasure seeing him before taking his leave. Curly shudders and says "that was 'orrible" as Brendan exits the store.

Alf instructs Deirdre to get rid of an empty cardboard box as he fusses about in readiness for the potential buyer. He speculates that his shop may be bought by a local gentleman who has already purchased several small neighbourhood stores. When Reg and Maureen come in, Alf gives them short shrift, telling them that he can't stop to chat as he has a buyer coming soon. His jaw drops in disbelief when he's informed that *they* are the potential buyers.

Raquel sits at a table at the sports club with Gordon and Wayne while Wayne tells her about how busy he's been, doing charitable work at a local kiddies' hospital. He offers to take Raquel out for a spin, and Raquel is clearly chuffed as she accepts, but just as they prepare to leave, Serena barges in. Wayne introduces her to Raquel, Serena blurts a quick "hi" without even looking at Raquel, and then tells Wayne to "hurry up." Wayne claims that he has to attend an interview that he'd forgotten about, and apologizes to Raquel before leaving. While Raquel muses that it must be awful being "famous," Gordon offers to buy her another drink.

Back at the Corner Shop, Alf angrily refuses to show his books to Reg and Maureen, and accuses the pair of them of being up to mischief and pulling a dirty prank on him. Audrey can see that they mean business, though, so pulls the books out from behind the counter, but Alf snaps at her, instructing her to put them away. Reg insists that they can't gauge the success of the shop without looking at the figures, but Alf informs him that if he really is serious, he should go through "the proper channels." Maureen interrupts and calmly tells Alf that she did do things properly -- she was the one who called the estate agent, and she was the one who made the appointment to see the shop. They are quite serious about buying the place, *if* it appears to be a good investment, but they can't know that until they see the books. Alf reluctantly hands them over.

In the Kabin, Rita asks Don Brennan if he's planning to attend the engagement party, and they both laugh when Don states flatly that he can't understand what Maureen sees in Reg. Derek comes in, obviously on his way home from work, and asks Mavis if he should start their tea, but Mavis informs him that she isn't hungry. "She's off her food because you're off your rocker," quips Rita, advising Derek that things will only get worse between him and Des if he continues to chuck bits and pieces of the van over the fence. She points out that Derek would love to have Des out of his hair, but "no one will buy his property if you keep that up." A thoughtful Derek confesses that he realizes now that his timing wasn't all that good.

Des arrives home and Doug offers to make a cuppa. He disappears into the kitchen, and seconds later Des hears a loud "OY." He rushes to the kitchen in time to see Doug confront Derek in the back yard, where Derek is trying to gather up the various van pieces he's lobbed over the fence. Doug puts an arm-lock on Derek, yelling at Des to call the police, while Derek explains that he's only trying to undo what he's done. Mavis stands at her own back door, shouting over the fence that Derek is only trying to "do the right thing." As the pushing and shoving escalate, Des yells at Doug to get back inside, Derek and Doug argue loudly with each other, and a startled Mavis continues to shout at all of them. At that very moment, Mr. Wilkie appears in the back yard, and after viewing the chaos for a few seconds, turns abruptly and leaves. Des tries to talk to him, pleading for a chance to explain, but Wilkie announces that he's seen quite enough.

In Bet's living room, she and Stella sip on drinks while Bet explains that Harry Potts has had them "for mugs." Alf looked into it for her, and there are no road-widening schemes planned -- "not here, not at the White Swan." Worse than that, Bet has called around and learned that Potts has been stringing along quite a few other landladies. Bet was only offering the snake free pints and the odd free lunch, but she understands that at some pubs, "Potts has been getting more than free ale, apparently." "Rumours, Bet," Stella responds. "I wouldn't give them too much credence." Bet doesn't agree, though, reminding Stella that Potts is "a con man... and we've been had... only some of us have been had that little bit more than others." "These rumours," Stella ventures, looking somewhat uncomfortable, "..I mean, if anyone's been spreading scurrilous gossip about me..." "Oh give over, Stella," Bet answers reassuredly, "anyone going with Harry Potts needs their eyes tested." As a thoughtful-looking Stella removes her specs and puts them back in her purse, Bet struggles with herself and tries not to laugh.

Back on the street, Raquel and Gordon have a drink at the Rovers Return while she thanks Gordon for a smashing time. "It was nice to see Wayne too, if only for a few minutes" Raquel adds, noting somewhat wistfully that she'd have to get used to "sharing" Wayne if she married him. "Marry him?" asks a startled Gordon, and Raquel confesses that she realizes it's "wishful thinking. But wives married to celebrities have to get used to sharing, don't they? You know, public property, figures like My Wayne. It wouldn't do to be too possessive." Gordon tries ever so gently to educate Raquel on what's really happening by telling her that he's seen a few public figures at the club... "take more than they give, most of them." Gordon characterizes the "celebs" as being "selfish," men who "use people, if you know what I mean." Raquel insists that Her Wayne isn't like that. "You heard him," she tells Gordon, "off to the kiddie's hospital, off with Serena to another interview. He never stops."

As Stella readies to leave the pub, she and Bet vow that they won't let Harry Potts get away with what he's done to them. The two women decide that they'll think about it and come up with something. Bet is surprised to see Raquel go through to the back so soon from her date, and Raquel tells her that things didn't work out because Wayne was "too busy."

The Corner Shop is closed for another day, and Alf is outside when Reg returns the books. Alf accuses him of having a good nosey, and doubts that Reg could come up with his £73,000 asking price. Reg suggests that after perusing Alf's accounts, £65,000 might be a more reasonable asking price. Alf angrily tells him that he's had his fun, and snaps "goodnight" before driving off.

Back inside after the kerfuffle in the yard, Des tells Doug that he has 24 hours to get packed and get out. "Oh, come on, Des," Doug pleads, offering to discuss things over a pint, but Des says "no thanks," and accuses Doug of messing up his life. Doug protests that it was Derek who started all this, and sees Des as being a victim of circumstance, adding that Wilkie should have made an appointment rather than showing-up unannounced. "That's another thing I don't need" adds Des -- "your twisted logic. Tomorrow, find yourself a flat!" he yells before slamming the door on his way to the pub.

Heather Morlan

Gordon Blinkhorn: MARK CHATTERTON Wayne Farrell: RAY POLHILL Brendan Scott: MILTON JOHNS Serena Black: INGRID WELLS Mr. Wilkie: MALCOLM SCATES Stella Rigby: VIVIENNE ROSS
Written by TOM ELLIOTT Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Thursday (3544, Friday 21 May 1993)

Derek wanders dejectedly out into the garden, scraping the leavings of his breakfast plate for the birds and trying to avoid looking at the rust heap. Des comes out and the two men end up having words again, arguing over who's the lunatic. Des goes back inside and snaps Doug's head off, insisting he be gone by tonight. Mavis drives Rita to distraction with her endless moaning and effrontery that Des could have the nerve to call her Derek a lunatic! No! Not Our Derek! Rita's voice is engorged with sarcasm, Not the man that drilled through the ceiling, studs, floorboard, bed frame and waterbed mattress just to fix a little light fixture? You WOULD bring that up again, Mavis retorts. Rita gets fed up and thunks a weighty Yellow Pages directory down on the counter. Shift it yerself and send Des the bill!

Bettabuys is a seething hive of broodery today, everyone on tenterhooks waiting for the axe to fall and wondering whose job it's going to fall on. Curly broods about the future of his job. Reg reveals to Curly that he's planning to put in for redundancy and buy a small grocery business though he's not ready to say whose. It should be obvious but Curly doesn't twig though is somewhat placated with the idea that if Reg leaves, he could be in line to fill Reg's managerial shoes. Ivy broods about the same thing. Job loss. But also she's mulling over her idea of running Alf's shop with Don although, as she later tells Gail, she still hasn't broached the subject to Don yet. Gail advises her that she had better before she takes the plan any further. Maureen is brooding about her mother's refusal to attend the engagement party because she thinks they don't want her there. Reg sees it for what it is, emotional martyrdom. Maureen wants Reg to ask Maud personally if she arranges for her mother to come to the store this afternoon. Reg agrees to crawl an inch but refuses to crawl a mile. If she really doesn't want to come, he's not going to bend over backwards.

Every time we turn around, Raquel is leaving inanely stupid ramblings of love on Wayne's answering machine, much to Bet's exasperation and Liz's amusement. Liz is still on tenterhooks (which might be another word for stilettos, judging from the costumes she's been sporting lately, shorter, tighter, lower necklines.) She still hasn't heard where or when they'll be awarded their own pub. Bet tries to warn her not to get her hopes up too high but later, when Wilmore comes to the pub to see Bet, he gives Liz good news. Start packing, he can't say where just yet, but it's a matter of days! Liz skips across the floor (no mean feat in them shoes) and whirls Raquel around with a squeal!

Reg manages to talk Maud into attending the party in spite of herself. He reads a daft little poem to her out loud in the middle of the store, which, silly as it was, was still rather cute. As quite a little crowd of amused observes has gathered and applauded his efforts, she is embarrassed into accepting the invitation.

Bet sees Harry in Alf's shop and lures him to accepting an invite to the pub tonight with a bat of an eye and an offer of a few drinks and company of "old friends". Hmmmmmmm.

Derek comes home from work in a mood and it's not helped by a forlorn Doug who's trudging down the street with all his worldly goods under his arm and blaming Derek. A truck goes buy with THE rusty old van on it's trailer, Derek sees it and thinks Des has had the van removed! He skips happily into the Kabin to gloat and doesn't let Mavis get a word in edgewise in his excitement. Des comes home and ascertains that Doug has left the premises, evidenced by a handful of change on the kitchen table with a note "For Electric". Out back, he notices the junk is gone and goes out. Derek is there surveying the damage to the patio blocks and birdhouse. He offers an olive branch, promising to give Derek a hand with the repairs and the two men call truce and shake hands.

In the pub, Don has Denise in stitches with a humorous cabby story. Why is it we only ever hear the ends of these knee slappers!? Ivy observes, sour faced until she can stand it no longer and interrupts for a word. They start bickering and Denise leaves them to it. Ivy starts to tell Don about the shop idea and we only get to see his reaction. Which is as you might expect. Spending long hours together, 7 days a week and sharing a small one bedroom flat when they can barely manage to share the same house? It's barmy! He pours ice on her plans and she runs out of the pub in tears of humiliation. (well, she WILL insist on denying the fact that her marriage is over in all but name!)

Outside the pub, Maud is being unloaded from a van. She nearly rolls over Maureen as the chair comes down the ramp rather too quickly, likely giving Elizabeth Bradley quite an alarming start! She certainly was clutching the arms of the chair with white knuckles! LOL! Mavis and Derek are introduced and Reg comes bouncing out of the pub excitedly. He grabs control of the chair from Maureen and spins it around to the curb, with Maureen attempting to help shift it up over the curb. Maureen slips and doubles over and, in what had to be an unscripted ad lib, Reg hikes the chair up over the curb with one hand and grabs Maureen around the waist with the other and pulls her up as well before running along with Maud in through the pub door. Maud seems a bit uncomfortable in the pub at first, it not being her usual destination in her older age but Bet makes her feel quite at home with a kiss on the cheek.

Outside, Mavis and Derek are arguing. Derek doesn't want to go into the pub because of Reg and Mavis is fed up with his moods. If it isn't Reg it's Des he's trying to avoid. It's all this macho business, Derek, you're always locking horns! (*me wiping juice off the telly screen!*) Des comes along just then and his remarks make it clear to Derek that it was Mavis that had the van shifted. Des goes into the pub and Mavis avoids eye contact.

Inside, Harry has arrived. From outside, we hear an outraged Derek screaming, YOU DID WHAT, MAVIS??!!??!!??!! Bet serves Harry up a drink just as Stella arrives. Harry raises an eyebrow and a bead of sweat. Bet introduces Liz to Harry, revealing that Liz is going to be a landlady in her own right. She tells Liz that Harry knows which pub Liz will be given the reigns to. Harry looks quizzical, denying it but Stella and Bet, in unison, describe Liz's pub as the one where a new street is bound to be built! Isn't that right Harry? Harry realizes the jig is up and Bet leans in and forces him to buy a round for the entire pub as an engagement toast to the happy couple. Harry, ever the politician, makes a pretty little speech and an offer, to the pleasure of the crowd. Once that's done, Reg approaches Alf and offers him 68K for the shop and valuation of the stock. Alf mulls it over and accepts, much to the pleasure of Audrey who is so excited she kisses both Alf AND Reg soundly!

Diane Johnston

Harry Potts RUSSELL DIXON Stella Rigby VIVIENNE ROSS Richard Wilmore OLIVER BEAMISH
Written by JULIAN ROACH Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Friday (3545, Monday 24 May 1993)

As Bet struggles to wake herself up to another day, Raquel prattles on about chicken recipes. "Chicken goulash..." she sounds out the name of one recipe to herself. She's trying to come up with the perfect dish for "her" Wayne when she cooks for him on Wednesday, her birthday. Bet struggles to seem interested but it's evident she'd prefer to be left alone with her fag and cuppa. Raquel explains that she's determined to make an impression with her culinary skills, especially since Wayne recently said something she considers to be very significant - that his manager has been on at the players to get wed... As Bet mulls this over, Raquel switches back to chicken. To Bet's annoyance, she comes out with a head-scratcher. "Bet? What part of the chicken is the goulash from?"

Alf is worried about being late into the shop this morning despite Audreh's attempts to serve him his tea in bed. She wants him to start practicing for retirement when he can take things easier now the shop is sold. Alf resists the idea - he doesn't consider Reg's offer concrete until he gets the money in his hand and anyway, he's worried the bread-man won't bring enough barm cakes. Finally, Audreh succeeds in getting him back to bed for one of her "special massages", if only for a half hour.

Bet and her pal Stella Rigby are off shopping this morning, both after new frocks for the Licensed Victualler's do this evening. As they set out to do some "serious boutique bashing" Liz turns up a few minutes late, explaining breathlessly that Jim has had to go to Ireland to see to his mother who is ill. Bet pauses to ask if it's anything serious but as Liz explains, she's had these turns before but as she's not getting any younger (some of us are?) Jim thought it best to go and see her.

Ivy comes into Alf's Mini-Market and is surprised to see Deirdre on her own. Deirdre grumbles that Alf hasn't turned up yet just as the man himself comes through the door, protesting that Audreh made him late. He inquires whether the bread%2dman has turned up but Deirdre tells him to never mind the bread%2dman - she's upset that she had the news of the shop being sold through the grapevine, from Curly! Alf explains that he only made the deal the night before so he couldn't have told her much sooner. Ivy is taken aback at the news that Reg Holdsworth is to be the new owner and comments that she had hopes she and Don might buy it. As she leaves, Alf speculates that she mustn't have been serious but Deirdre reckons she must have been - "Isn't joking against Ivy's religion?"

In the Rovers, Curly remarks to Reg that he's changed overnight since making the deal with Alf. Here it is, barely half past 12 and he's supping ale. And, Curly knows for a fact, he's left his "inbox" full, which for Reg is apparently unheard of before going to lunch! Reg takes in the observation with a sniff of confidence, assuring Curly that if his successor should prove totally incompetent, the store would continue to run "like a well-oiled machine" for six months following his departure. Speaking of his successor, Curly would like to have Reg put in a word for him but Reg abruptly changes the subject, saying it's not within his control to suggest someone for the job. Curly can't understand why he can't at least recommend him - until Reg admits that it wouldn't do for head office to know he wants to leave! It turns out his offer to Alf is contingent on getting a "golden handshake", something he can't be assured of if Bettabuys knows he wants to leave the company! No, he must play his cards close to his chest for now, make them want shut of him in other words! Curly is shocked that Reg made the offer to Alf under such tentative circumstances, "My God - it's the court of the Borgias!" he comments.

Liz has been summoned to the phone by Betty and talking to Mr. Willmore, she hears that she and Jim are being offered a pub of their own. She tells the brewery boss she is delighted at the news - *they* are delighted - and concludes the phone call in a flush of excitement, calling Willmore by his first name, evidently at his insistence.

When Bet and Stella arrive back from their shopping expedition, Liz is bursting with the news - she is moving on to manage the Queens! Their faces fall in unison when they hear the name. Stella reckons there must be some mistake - why should the brewery put "novices" in the Queen's - it's one of their top houses! Bet is equally flummoxed but Liz assures them that's what Willmore's just told her on the phone - the Queens! With the headiness of her new role, she offers to buy the "other landladies" a drink. Bet and Stella can only stare in shocked silence as the news sinks in...

A few minutes later, as Bet sees Stella out to her taxi, they discuss the sudden turn of events. Stella thinks it a slap in the face that Bet wasn't offered the Queens - after all, Liz has only been in the business five minutes and she learnt all she knows from Bet and Stella! Bet shrugs it off as a lucky break but admits it would have been nice to be asked. As they part, they agree to meet at the White Swan for a drink before the Victuallers' Ball tonight.

As Bet re-enters the Rovers, she stops to note that Liz is basking in congratulations from Raquel, Betty and the patrons. Gritting her teeth, she pushes through to the back without adding to the reverie. Betty and Raquel agree in whispers that she seems to be "a tad" jealous of Liz' good fortune.

In the Kabin, Emily, Mavis and Rita are reminiscing about Whit Sunday, how it *used* to be celebrated when Raquel comes in looking for a special candle for the special dinner she has planned for her Wayne. The Kabin has nothing suitable, only ordinary candles, but Raquel had a fancy one in mind - "the kind with scrolls and twiddly bits". Mavis says she has just the thing at home and she'll be glad to let Raquel have it. When Raquel protests that Mavis may want it herself someday, Mavis laments that Derek refuses to burn the thing, citing the dangers of "second-hand candle fumes"!

Liz takes time from her dinner break to call Jim from home and tell him the good news. From her end, it sounds as if Jim is also delighted they've been given the Queens. After completing the call, she tells the boys she'd best be off, if she wants to keep on Bet's good side. She pauses for a second in the doorway to reflect that before long, other people will be trying to keep on *her* good side!

Gordon comes into the pub to ask whether Raquel has been able to set anything up with Wayne for her birthday. She tells him about the dinner she's planning and Gordon seems surprised to hear that Wayne has found a free evening. Raquel dreamily ponders what Wayne might give her as a birthday pressie - she shouldn't be surprised if it's an engagement ring!

Liz arrives in the pub to take her evening shift, breathlessly apologizing for being late. Dressed in yellow and black for the Licensed Vick's Do, Bet is every inch the queen bee in appearance and mood. She sharply reminds Liz that she's due at Stella's and doesn't appreciate being kept waiting. Just as she's off, Willmore happens in and she smiles apologetically explaining that she wasn't expecting him. Never mind, it's Liz he's come to see anyway, he smiles. Bet's face registers her annoyance as Liz invites "Richard" to come through to the back.

With Bet gone, Liz jokes that she hope the brewery hasn't had second thoughts about giving her and Jim the pub. On the contrary, Richard assures her, adding that he hopes she is still interested. "Thrilled!" she enthuses, mentioning the incidental information (for the first time) that Jim is away in Ireland. That shouldn't present a problem as far as Richard is concerned - the existing bar staff are there to help out after all.

Audreh takes a stab at persuading Alf to close the shop early but he is unwilling and insists on staying on until regular closing time. Audreh can't see the point and gets on her coat to leave but as Alf explains, if profits start slipping now, Reg will seize the chance to haggle the price down. A touching scene follows as Alf zestfully tells her, he's spent the happiest times of his life in this little shop. She tells him she's hoping some happy times are yet to come for them outside the shop but he assures her, if he had life to live over again, he wouldn't change a thing. Sensing she's lost the battle but bearing in mind she's won the war, Audreh kisses him gently before going off to the Rovers.

Mavis comes into the pub with her "special" candle and a grateful Raquel offers her a drink. Mavis modestly accepts a medium sherry and an embarrassed moment follows as she is left standing next to Gordon while Raquel goes off to get the bottle. Joining them again, Raquel introduces Gordon as a friend of her Wayne's, the kind of friend she wishes Wayne had more of as the others can be "pretty childish". Mavis smiles politely and Raquel continues with a story of the date she and Wayne had last night.... While sat in Wayne's car, just talking, she idly flipped the glove box open, "Just for summat to do, you know..." Apparently, out tumbled some underwear, a black brassiere! Raquel recounts how upset she was and Gordon is quick to chime in, "As well you should be!" But to his and Mavis' shocked surprise, Raquel goes on to say that Wayne explained the bra away as a "joke" some of the lads had played on him. "They're always playing pranks like that", says Raquel in amusement. "Your Derek must have had some played on him?" Mavis, utterly horrified at the story, gulps the remainder of her sherry and murmurs that she doesn't think so - she's sure she would have remembered something like that! She suddenly remembers that she has to get Derek's dinner and rushes out, wishing Raquel success with the dinner.

Seated in their booth, Angie watches as Neil moodily runs his finger round the rim of his glass. She tries to cheer him by asking how his day was but he remains introspective, saying only that he's had better...

At the Swan, Bet and Stella polish off their pre-party drinks before heading off to the evening's main event. Bet has been venting about Liz' sudden rise to power, remarking particularly that she called Willmore by his first name. Stella doesn't see anything too unusual in that, having called him "Richard" herself for years. Bet wonders just how well acquainted Stella and Willmore are but Stella giggles at the suggestion that there was ever anything between them. "I've always said, one husband and one boyfriend is enough for anyone at the same time", she jokes. "Why Stella - you sweet old-fashioned girl!" Bet cracks. Still, she muses that the new landlady of the Queens will be "talk of the wash house" tonight. Stella remarks on what a "tasty bit" Jim is, suggesting that Liz will have her work cut out for her trying to keep both him and "Tricky Dicky" (Willmore) happy! Bet is very sure that Liz has no involvement with Willmore but Stella seems to equally sure she wouldn't have got the Queens if she hadn't! Telling Bet not to be naive, Stella assures her that Liz and the brewery boss must have something going if *she* knows "Tricky Dicky". Bet responds cooly, "Well, if *I* know Jim McDonald, and I do - Tricky Dicky had better watch his step!"

Anita Bélanger

Stella Rigby: VIVIENNE ROSS Gordon Blinkhorn: MARK CHATTERTON Richard Willmore: OLIVER BEAMISH
Written by JOHN STEVENSON Directed by GARETH MORGAN


Originally transmitted: 26, 28 & 31 May; 2 & 4 June 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 15 - Friday 19 May 2000
Episode Numbers: 3546 - 3550

Monday (3546, Wednesday 26 May 1993)

Reg doesn't own the shop yet but he's already making plans. As he and Curly get in the car to go to work, he declares the shop needs to be the heart of the street, calling for a big and bold look about it, not black blinds on the windows. Curly's more concerned that Reg put in a good word for his promotion.

Raquel, hair in curlers, walks in to the bar and reveals a new dress. Both Bet and Betty's backs are turned at the time but Raquel gets all stroppy when she pirouettes and they don't admire her. She leaves the room and the other two smile secretively at each other.

Jim's in Ireland nursing his mom so Deirdre sends her best through Liz who's dropped into the shop. Doug, looking woollier than ever now that his beard is grown in, reveals to Denise and Kevin, also shopping this morning, that he's back living at his sister's and playing referee between her and her husband. Audrey returns to pick Alf up for lunch and is annoyed to find out that Alf was showing a potential buyer round just this morning in spite of verbally accepting Reg's offer. His eyes are bigger than his belly, and that's saying summat, Audrey declares with a short laugh.

Bet takes a call from Jim on the pub phone. She is friendly but her laugh and voice have a brittle edge to it as she congratulates him on grabbing the brass ring. She insinuates that one of them must have charmed the brewery to get the Queen's and knowing Wilmore, it wouldn't be the one wearing the jeans. Her face turns to stone when she hangs up. Betty looks at her suspiciously, having overheard that last bit.

Curly watches perplexed and puzzled as Reg stuffs two twists of tissue up his nose like a little white Hitler moustache and calls head office to talk to Brendan Scott who isn't in. Reg seems to be pretending to have a cold when he talks to the secretary, ascertaining when Brendan will be back.

Raquel comes into the bar, which isn't open yet and curiously empty of the other staff until Bet, Betty and Liz jump from around various corners to wish her a Happy Birthday and hand over the goods. It looks like a satin pajama top or smoking jacket, vintage apparently and all the rage though Raquel doesn't seem to appreciate it. Still, she smiles at the flowers she is given and is delighted that Betty offers to help her cook a meal for Wayne tonight. After all that, Bet then "remembers" to tell Liz that Jim phoned.

Outside, Neil drives up and turns to wave at Denise who's outside her shop but he's burned to see Hanif pull up in his snazzy red two seater. Neil watches the pair canoodle, distracted and not paying attention to Emily who has summoned him for an estimate of something or other.

Reg is watching the clock. It's nearly noon and he's counting a wad of money to pass the time.

Back to the bar, Betty is suggesting various menus for Raquel to serve to Wayne. Angie buys her a drink for her Birthday but the kind gesture is ruined when she and Dougie and Kevin take the mickey, making fun of Wayne and his lackluster prowess on the football field and wherever else his prowess might need improvement. Raquel stoutly defends her Wayne. The best line of the day was Angie's "Builders, footballers and mechanics, they're not dissimilar. They all dribble before they score!" Bet sees Wilmore come in but directs Liz to a corner to serve so she can get him in the back for a few minutes alone. Well, not completely as Betty hovers around making and bringing the tea things so she hears Bet question the brewery's decision. Many have been on the waiting list a long time for the Queens and a lot are saying it's not fair. Wilmore shoots across the bow, snidely remarking that they try to match personality of the bar with the personality of the manager! With that, Liz arrives and finds out that Wilmore wants her to start taking over on Monday even if Jim isn't back from Ireland yet. Bet sits like a statue, listening as if she's barely holding back her temper. Must be, because she doesn't even have that fake smile pasted on as she hears Wilmore helpfully offering all the brewery and existing staff's support.

Out in the bar, Hanif asks Denise to a formal charity dinner and dance tonight. In spite of the rudely short notice, she agrees to go. Bet comes out into the bar only to be chastised by Betty for being spiteful with Wilmore. Bet snaps, You're not paid to earwig! Thank God! Betty offers. Bet defensively argues that she wasn't being spiteful. Betty calls her on it, generously pointing out that Liz and Jim deserve a bit of good luck for a change. It's time somebody smiled down on 'em. Bet muses, it's who's smiling on 'em that worries her. You can tell she doesn't trust Wilmore any farther than she can toss a barrel at him, not with his reputation for chasing skirt. Betty doesn't think that's the case here, Liz is very happily married! Bet isn't so sure, she thinks he might be vulnerable, they've had it rough lately. It's the fastest takeover she's seen in peacetime. But Betty is skeptical. Neil comes in, gives Angie a kiss but isn't happy to see Denise and Hanif nose to nose in a corner.

Back home, Liz has called Jim to tell him the latest and assures him that she'll manage. The lads will help her pack and "Richard" will be there for support with things like the books until she gets the hang of it. She's taken aback at a questions Jim asks..."don't be daft, of course i love yer!" (Where did all those doubts suddenly spring from i wonder????)

Deirdre frets about her job, but Alf ignores her and witters on sentimentally about his days as a shopkeeper.

Betty and Raquel share some wine in the kitchen while Betty does up a beef in wine sauce. Raquel moons wistfully over Wayne and their future, thinking they should have a long engagement until his career really takes off. (If it hasn't by now, luv,.....)

Liz sets a fancy table with wine for the boys to break the news about their impending departure and her need for assistance packing up. Plan is, Steve will stay in the house until they decide what to do with it (i wouldn't count my chickens just yet!) and of course he'll pay board. Andy is off back to university Monday. She has a flash of insecurity and asks for their assurance that she's doing the right thing. They seem to hesitate slightly but both tell her that they think she can do it. Go for it, Mum!

That evening, Denise arrives all dolled up in a dress whose pattern looks to me more like an old fashioned slipcover. Her hair is piled up with a thick lock framing either side of her face. Neil and a few other male voices off cameral sound their appreciation to her delight. She accepts a drink from him. Audrey puts her foot in it. She talks about spending extra time with the grandchildren but ends up insulting Emily by implying that Emily never followed up on her retirement travel plans because she was either too old or too poor.

Bet and Betty listen at the living quarters door for any sound or sign but they hear nothing and surmise that Wayne hasn't arrived yet. He hasn't as we see Raquel fuss over the table, laid to perfection. Bet and Betty jump and scram to the bar when the back doorbell rings. Raquel comes out looking nervous and opens the door but it's only Gordon who's brought birthday flowers for her. She's pleased but hustles him into the bar, much to the puzzlement of Bet and Betty who ask Gordon if he's brought along Wayne. No. Their faces drop and worry begins to flicker. And in truth, their concern is warranted. A little later, a tearful Raquel totters out into the bar and collapses in Betty's arms, facing the truth that Wayne isn't going to show up. Gordon gauges the situation but doesn't look too surprised. The next thing you know, Gordon is escorting Raquel to his car, going in search of Wayne and telling her "Gordon will sort it out" (i'll just bet he will. I don't trust this bloke, he's TOO nice!)

Curly and Angie dodge traffic and enter the bar just as a very spiffy tuxedo clad Hanif does. Neil, surly and competitive, insists on buying a round of drinks before Hanif and Denise leave.

Gordon drives Raquel to Wayne's. Or it could be the football club. There are businesses nearby and it's by the canal. Raquel clatters up to the door on her high heels and starts to bang on the door and scream hysterically. Wayne finally opens the door and emerges, wearing a dressing gown and looking decidedly post-coital. She accuses him of forgetting their date, and it's her birthday and everything. He tells her, in so many words, that she's read too much in to their relationship. He tells her to back off, he never made any promises. Serena shows up behind Wayne and tells Raquel to push off as well. Stunned, the penny drops and Raquel turns and runs back into Gordon's arms sobbing her heart out in humiliation. He apologizes, if he'd known she was going to be there ... (oh right, like he didn't?)

Hanif stands up to go start the car. Neil starts a pissing contest with him, challenging him to remain while Denise finishes the drink he bought her. There's a bit of verbal pushing and shoving and at one point, when Denise gets between the men, Hanif pushes her out of the way. Not harshly but it sets off Neil like a spark to blue touch paper and he beings to shout, warning Hanif not to push "his wife" around. Hanif prudently turns to walk away (as he's about twice as tall as Neil) but Neil grabs him and shoves him into a booth where he cracks the side of his face on the seat. Curly pulls Neil away and out of camera range while Denise gets Hanif out of the pub. Suddenly Neil's little body comes flying back into the scene and lands in the same empty booth that Hanif recently vacated and it soon becomes clear that it was Angie that launched him there in anger! She passes by and shoots him a dirty look and leaves.

Raquel leaves Gordon and runs back to the door of Wayne's ground floor flat, banging and hollering for him again. He opens the door, angry now but only gets "Now Look...." out before she pulls him out, spins him around, knees him where it hurts and pushes him into the canal, screaming "You're as bad in bed as you are at footie and if she tells you owt else, she's lyin'!" With that, she spins on a heel and marches back to Gordon.

Neil staggers out of the pub and trudges down around the corner. His progress is abruptly impeded when two bin bags land at his feet, defenestrated by Angie who makes sure he sees he's no longer welcome before she closes the window and the blind.

Diane Johnston

Richard Wilmore OLIVER BEAMISH Gordon Blinkhorn MARK CHATTERTON Wayne Farrell RAY POLHILL (last appearance) Serena Black INGRID WELLS (last appearance)
Written by PAUL ABBOTT Directed by GARETH MORGAN

Tuesday (3547, Friday 28 May 1993)

Gail's got her hands full serving brekkie at the Cafe; unfortunately all anyone - including Phyllis, who came in to help - seems to want to do is talk about last night's dust-up in the Rovers. Curly comes in and asks lots of questions about whether Gail's seen Angie, and whether she saw Neil leave this morning, and finally goes upstairs to check on her. Angie is curled up on her sofa looking unhappy and doesn't respond to his knocking and calling.

At the Rovers, Bet is having about as much luck with Raquel. Her repeated calls result in Raquel tottering to the top of the stairs in housecoat and croaking "I don't feel well". She doesn't look well and all, Bet agrees, and sends her back to bed with a promise to come up in a minute with a couple of tablets.

Back in the Cafe, Curly is worried enough to ask Gail for the spare key and Gail has finally stopped being irritated at him and is worried enough to give it to him. ("You don't suppose she -?" frets Gail.) Angie is packing Neil's things into garbage bags when Curly enters, and she's predictably furious. "I was afraid you'd done something stupid," pleads Curly, and Angie replies that "the only stupid thing I did was getting involved with men. GET OUT!" She confiscates the key before he leaves, and poor Norman gets an earful from Gail, too, when he tells her.

Alf is going through some paperwork at home when there's a knock at the door. It's Vivian Barford, who does an "I-was-just-in-the-neighbourhood". He offers her a glass of sherry, seeing it's gone eleven a.m., and she replies that she thinks "people who work as hard as we do have gained the right to indulge ourselves at any time and in any way we please!" A small one, then? suggests Alf, but the Widow Barford instructs him to fill 'er up!

Raquel is up and dressed and behind the bar at the Rovers. Bet offers a sympathetic ear as she talks a bit about Wayne and how hurt she is. Liz appears; it's her last day and Raquel warmly tells her how much she will miss her as Betty smiles. Bet, on the other hand, is cold as ice to Liz, barely acknowledging her. When Liz leaves Bet turns to see Betty's reproachful gaze. "I know, Betty," says Bet guiltily, adding with a shrug and a shake of her head that at the same time "I don't know" (why she's being this way).

At the MacDonald's, Steve and Andy are dressed in their best as they prepare to take their Mum out. (Jim's in Ireland, so he is.) They're teasing her about how fine she looks and how they won't be able to let her out of their sight when she suddenly bursts into tears. It's about Bet, she admits. Is she still being mean? ask the lads, and then in a nice turnabout of parental advice-giving they advise her to "just ignore her!" Liz can't, though: "It's me last day and it means something to me." Andy, clever lad, understands and explains that Bet has lost first Alec, now her best barmaid - and to rub salt in the wound, Newton and Ridley's has given Liz the best pub in Weatherfield. They'll be there to support her tonight, they pledge. [The boys were lovely in this scene. Too bad the writers didn't build on the "basically-decent, hard-scrabble family sticking together through thick-and-thin" subtext the MacDonald's had in those days.]

Back at the Roberts', Vivian looks well-settled-in but coyly turns down the offer of another sherry. It wouldn't be prudent for Audrey to find her there, she says! Poor Alf replies he can't imagine why he couldn't visit with his friends as all her innuendo and flirting goes right over his head - whoosh! They peruse some cruise brochures Audrey had left on the coffee table. Alf, predictably, is mortified at the prices, but Vivian thinks they'd be *terribly* romantic. You can lose your head on one of those cruises, she croons, leaning towards Alf. "Yes, I should think you could!" says Audrey, who's walked in unnoticed. Vivian flutters guiltily. Audrey notes the sherry glass. "Trying to get Vivian drunk, are we?" she says in a voice that's terribly amiable and faux-cheerful. "You know, Vivian, he does that with me when he wants to have his *wicked way* with me." Vivian is utterly flapped and makes a quick escape as Alf seems to wonder what's going on!

At the clothing factory, Hanif confronts Angie with an ugly cut on his face. She is downright belligerent in response. "What do I care?" she asks. He has an important meeting today and it won't do for him to meet clients looking like some kind of cowboy after a brawl, Hanif seethes. Most of them think he's a cowboy already, she replies flippantly. Finally Hanif asks where she has been for the past three and a half hours (which is presumably how late she is for work). "I took the morning off - do you mind?" she asks rudely. "Not at all," replies Hanif. "You can take the rest of your life off as far as I'm concerned." He says he needs a dedicated buyer, not "a second rate designer" and continues, "You're finished here. You can pick up your cards from the office on your way out." "So this is what spoilt little boys do when their pride gets hurt," sneers Angie. "No," says Hanif calmly. "It's what sensible businessmen do when they realize they've made a mistake." Angie looks stung, and exits.

In the Rovers, Martin and Don sign a card for Liz. Denise overhears them gossiping about Neil and Hanif's scrap in the Rovers and takes them to task (Martin comments that Hanif *was* dating Neil's "old lady". "Less of the old lady" she puts in.) Martin guiltily asks how Hanif is and she says she wouldn't know, she hasn't seen him since last night. Curly comes in looking for Angie. He tells Martin that he's worried about her, and that she kicked Neil out last night. Denise overhears and also looks concerned.

Rita is at the bar and asks Bet what's bothering her. Bet takes the opportunity to take Rita back to the kitchen for a private chat. She confesses to Rita that she is bitter although she's trying not to be; after all her hard work, they gave The Queen's to Liz. And it's one of the best! Rita reminds Bet that she turned down Alec to stay at the Rovers Return - did she really want The Queen's? Bet admits that she would've liked the chance to turn it down!

Rita says that she thinks Bet sees Liz as herself, years ago. She sees all these opportunities opening for Liz that didn't for Bet - and they're not likely to now. Rita says that she understands, 'cause she's there, too. She comments that Liz is an attractive woman, not averse to fluttering her eyelashes at someone who can help her out. "Our eyelash-fluttering days are over," she says wryly. Bet knows that as usual, Rita is right.

Back at the MacDonald's, the trio have returned from their outing. The boys tease Liz about being Jim's boss - it's her name that'll be over The Queen's door. "Elizabeth J. MacDonald," says Liz proudly, envisioning it, but she warns them not to tease Jim about it!

At t'Rovers, Gordon arrives with flowers for Raquel. Butter wouldn't melt in his mouth as he says he was hoping Raquel would wear one of the roses when he took her out that night. She protests that she has to work, but Bet kindly intervenes and says she doesn't; after sending Raquel off to change she congratulates Gordon for cheering her up - "well done, lad." [Oho. Has everyone eating out of his hand, does Mr. Blinkhorn.]

Liz comes into the Rovers via the back door and chats with Betty. Bet appears. Liz tenses as Bet approaches her. "I want to apologize for the way I've behaved... you don't deserve the way I've treated you. I'm sorry." Liz clasps Bet's hand. "I'm just glad we're friends again," she says tearfully, as they embrace.

In her apartment, Angie glumly circles the few prospects in the "Help Wanted" ads.

The Rovers is full of well-wishers. Bet rings the bell for attention and makes a little speech about "a smashing barmaid and a lovely person". "You've been a real friend to me and God knows there's been times I needed one over this past year," she praises Liz. She mentions that Liz has been a friend to those on the other side of the bar as well, so they've had a collection and they want to present her with a voucher worth £50 and a gift - a shillelagh "for keeping drunken Irishmen quiet" (!) She says that she'll need it (no doubt this whole bad joke is actually at Jim's expense). They have three cheers for Liz, then it's her turn to speak. She says she doesn't really want to leave any of them, but "we've 'ad a lucky break and you don't get too many of them in a lifetime!" She says she doesn't want to take trade from Bet but wants them to know they'll all be welcome anytime in The Queen's.

Gordon and Raquel return from their outing. Raquel thanks Gordon for a lovely evening. "I just wanted to do what I could," he demurs. The poor gullible girl then tells Gordon that all this time while she was chasing a liar and a cheat, she had someone right under her nose "without an ounce of cunning in their whole body" [SOPOD!], someone who is "good, kind and honest... a real friend." Raquel apparently gets quite a bit closer to her friends than I do, for Gordon's manipulation pays off as she pulls him to her and gives him a very very passionate kiss.

ronniecat

Vivian Barford: PAULA TILLBROOK Hanif Ruparell: AYUB KHAN DIN Gordon Blinkhorn: MARK CHATTERTON
Written by KEN BLAKESON Directed by GARETH MORGAN

Wednesday (3548, Monday 31 May 1993)

It's another bank holiday, but the MacDonalds are up early, preparing for their move to The Queens. Liz carries out an armload of dresses on hangers, and carefully lays them across the back seat of the car. She returns to the house and warns Steve not to crease her clothes, while Jim packs things into cardboard boxes. He's still tired from his trip back from Ireland, but assures Liz he's fine with the few hours of kip he managed on the plane.

Martin bangs on the Webster's door, and is surprised to find Kev is still in his robe. He chides him about being lazy on a bank holiday.

At Jim's Cafe, Alma is chipping away at an ice cube tray with a pick when Angie comes down, looking for company. Alma explains that in spite of the holiday, Mike is away on a business trip to London, so she thought she might as well make herself useful at the cafe. Bashing ice with a sharp instrument is therapeutic, she tells Angie, and offers a tray to her. Angie decides to make a pot of coffee first.

Steve, Jim and Liz arrive at The Queens, and a huge smile appears on Liz' face when she sees Richard Willmore emerge from the pub as part of the welcoming committee. Jim looks less happy as he stares long and hard at the new sign that proclaims "Elizabeth MacDonald" as the new proprietor.

Gail and Sally are buying munchies at the Corner Shop for their day out with the children when Ivy comes in and announces that she's happy she caught Gail. She wonders if Gail would enjoy a day off while she takes the kiddies to an outing at All Saints Church. Gail thanks her, but tells her that she, Martin and the Websters have already planned a day for the children, and a clearly disappointed Ivy leaves. Gail wonders to Sally if she should have invited Ivy and Don to join them on their picnic, but before Gail can act upon her thoughts, Ivy rushes back into the store, offering instead to take Rosie. Gail and Sally exchange thoughtful glances as Ivy pushes her point that she'd be more than happy to take all the kids.

Willmore shows Liz around her new pub, adding that he hopes she'll find everything to her satisfaction. Jim senses a quiet resentment among the staff and asks the barman, Bob Cairns, if he's unhappy with the situation, pointing out that it wasn't his or Liz' fault that the former tenants were fired. Bob claims he has no quarrel with either of them, but warns Jim that the only reason Willy and Freda got "jacked" was because they refused to dance to Willmore's tune.

Apparently Gail and Sally decided not to look a gift horse in the mouth, and took Ivy up on her babysitting offer, because in the next scene we find the happy foursome leaving Ivy's place in high spirits and without children. Don pulls up in his cab at that moment, and asks Ivy what's up. A beaming Ivy informs him that she's babysitting the kiddies, and that he would be "letting down" his grandchildren if he doesn't join them.

Back at the Cafe, Angie is explaining the circumstances that led to her losing her job and her boyfriend. She doesn't seem terribly disillusioned by the whole thing, though, and laughingly admits that without a boss or a boyfriend to order her about, things should start looking up. Glancing around, she jokes that being in a cafe has made her very hungry, and she confesses to Alma that she could really go for a huge plate of chips so she can "stuff her face" until no man fancies her. Alma doesn't seem enthusiastic at first, but on second thought conspiratorially asks if Angie prefers the plain or crinkled kind.

Over at The Queens, business is booming as dozens of customers socialize over drinks in a darkened atmosphere. We get our first glimpse of Tania Pooley, who stands nearby, apparently eyeballing the new tenants and not doing a lot of work.

Neil arrives at Denise's salon, and obviously still angry over the donneybrook at the Rovers Return, Denise sharply warns him that if he's smart, he'll avoid Hanif in the future. In another of his pouty moods, Neil informs her that he won't be a problem anymore since he was chucked out by Angie and has decided to leave Weatherfield. "Are you pleased?" he asks sarcastically. Denise tells him that the salon is not the place for that sort of discussion and escorts him into the back where she asks him where he's planning to go. As usual, Neil isn't terribly forthcoming with information, and will only state that all his stuff will fit into his truck, so he can go anywhere he pleases -- although he isn't happy about it. Denise tells him sincerely that she's sorry things worked out the way they did, and Neil shrugs... and drops the bomb. Now he's wondering what she wants to do about "the settlement." He agreed to allow her to invest his half of their divorce settlement in the salon, but now that he's leaving town, he needs the money. Denise looks flattened by this little announcement.

Gail, Martin, Kevin and Sally have got as far as the Rovers Return, where they're enjoying rounds of drinks and a few games of darts. Martin does his best to shift them to the park where they intended to take the kids, but no one is in a hurry, and Gail wonders what the pub has to offer by way of lunch. Gordon arrives, to Raquel's obvious delight, and she gets him a drink.

Back at the salon, Fiona senses an imminent explosion, so discreetly leaves for her lunch. After the door closes, Denise blasts Neil, telling him how unfair he's being. She can't pull that sort of money out of thin air, and he knows it. Neil is unmoved by her anger and flatly repeats that he needs the money to get on with his life. Finally seeing Neil for the vindictive person he is, Denise angrily charges that he'll never forgive her, will he? Neil doesn't answer, suggesting instead that maybe they can work something out.

Alma drains a basket of chips and pops one into Angie's mouth while Angie opens a bottle of wine. As the two women enjoy each other's company, Alma confesses that she spent "many miserable days" in the flat upstairs, and reminisces about one especially dreadful Christmas when Mike threw her over for another woman. The two toast each other and shout in unison "WE'RE SHUT!" as someone rattles the door.

Over at The Queens, Tania introduces Jim to Eileen Carter, a landlady from a nearby pub. Eileen asks if Jim is married to the new landlady, and tells him that in the past her pub and The Queens have competed against each other in darts and dominoes matches -- which she hopes will continue. As Jim carries on with his duties, he quietly tells Liz that there's a definite "undercurrent" among their new staff.

At the Rovers Return, Gordon tries to talk to Raquel while she continues to serve the patrons. He claims (crafty devil) to be embarrassed over the incident with Wayne and Serena the other night, but Raquel interrupts and asks if he has any plans for that afternoon. When he replies that he's free, Raquel asks him not to leave. Elsewhere in the pub, Emily and Betty discuss Liz' departure to greener pastures, with Betty confiding that while Bet cracks on that she's chuffed for Liz, there's actually a lot of jealousy over Liz getting The Queens. Meanwhile, Curly sits alone, supping a pint.

The Websters and Platts have finally shifted themselves to the park, and they're all lying at the base of a huge tree, slightly drunk and clearly enjoying the day. A tipsy Sally wonders what it would be like not to have a baby, but then admits that she can't imagine life without Rosie, who is "brilliant." In fact, Ivy is "brilliant" too for taking all the kids, and the others laugh as Sally repeats herself. The giggling accelerates when they see Raquel and Gordon walking through the park, especially when Gordon removes his jacket and spreads it on the grass so that Raquel can sit.

Gordon begins his apology again, insisting that he doesn't want Raquel to think that he's taking advantage of the situation. He ought not to have kissed her after their night out, but Raquel insists that she was the one who kissed him. Furthermore, she doesn't want an apology because the kiss made her feel "wanted." Raquel gently reminds him that he doesn't have to wait for her to initiate another kiss, prompting Gordon to kiss her tenderly. Nearby, the Platts and Websters burst into laughter as this love scene unfolds, apparently unheard by Raquel or Gordon.

The Queens has closed for a few hours, and a little exhausted by the noon rush, Steve tells Tania that he doesn't understand how she can stick working there. Liz approaches as Tania steps off camera, and apparently taking their chat as flirtation on Steve's part, advises him that Tania would "chew him up and spit him out." Liz joins the staff, who are seated at a nearby table, and assures them that things went very smoothly and there will be no staff changes. They all somewhat awkwardly drink to her good luck.

The picnicers have retired to the Websters'; Gail and Sally have both fallen asleep on the sofa while Kevin and Martin watch a football match on the telly. Kevin gets up to answer the door, and Ivy pops her head in to advise Martin that she's back with the kiddies. "They were lovely," she adds happily.

Back at the Rovers Return, Neil sits at a booth with Denise while she writes him a cheque. A surprised Neil protests that he thought she couldn't afford to pay him off, but Denise angrily informs him that she's post-dated the cheque, and the funds will be available then. When Neil wonders how she'll come up with the money, Denise snaps that that's her problem, prompting him to assume a super-pout and whine that she must be "that desperate" to get rid of him. Exasperated by his behaviour, Denise tells him flatly that she's had it "up to here" with his games -- "they're NOT fair." Neil hopefully suggests that Denise still loves him, prompting her to leave without another word. Neil wipes his eyes as they well-up with tears, and Jack picks that moment to remind him that he's been barred.

Ivy and Don retreat to the Rovers Return for a drink while Ivy babbles about the wonderful day they just had with the children. She proposes that since it went so well, she and Don should take them for an outing to Blackpool. Her balloon is deflated when Don says "NO," telling her that while he doesn't mind spending a day with the grandkiddies, he resents the way Ivy uses them to force him to spend time with her.

Angie and Alma are feeling no pain as the wine disappears along with their chips. Alma leaves the room for a moment, and while Angie continues to giggle over stories they've been exchanging, she suddenly notices an envelope that has just been slipped under the door. Outside, Neil gets into his truck and drives off just as Angie steps outside with the envelope in her hand. Back inside, she tears it open and begins to read Neil's farewell letter. Alma returns to the room, pops a coin in the juke box, but realizes that Angie's mood has suddenly changed. Looking over her shoulder, she can clearly see the words "goodbye, Neil" at the bottom of the page. As Angie begins to sob "he's gone, he's gone," Alma hugs her and tries to assure her that things are going to be alright.

Heather Morlan

Richard Willmore: OLIVER BEAMISH Tania Pooley: EVA POPE Bob Cairns: STEVE HALLIWELL Eileen Carter: LESLEY STAPLES Gordon Blinkhorn: MARK CHATTERTON
Written by PAUL ABBOTT Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Thursday (3549, Wednesday 2 June 1993)

This was one of those episodes where nothing much happened, and it wasn't even charming or anything. It was just one of those episodes that just "is". Hard to really get into. So i think i'll take the short format if you don't mind.

Denise is P-O'd. Fiona sulks because she wants a raise and can't have one. Raquel wants a quick trim at noon but wants Fiona to do it, proving Fiona's point that she's a valuable employee. However a quick trim turns out to be a head full of cornrow braids bobbing about a pouffy little topknot, making her head look like a lampshade, the kind with tassels bobbing about. Across the noisy pub at lunch, Raquel calls over to Denise that Hanif called and he has business, thus canceling their date. Just when she thought he was over his fit over the Neil fight last week too! And so does Fiona because Denise thinks she was broadcasting Denise's business. It turns out Raquel only over heard Fiona take the call and took it upon herself. Denise's mood worsens now that the whole street knows her business which includes being stood up. Deirdre gets an earful from her several times during the day, both in the shop and in the pub. Deirdre's opinion? It's not that folk around here are nosy, they just like to mind everyone else's business. And she's got the battle scars to prove it!

To make matters worse for Denise, (just wait for it) Angie spends the morning whining until Sally bullies her into going to her old office to retrieve her black book of contacts and urges her to set up her sewing machine and work freelance. Steve is commandeered to bring the machine over after tea but Curly decides he'll do it, thoughtfully ordering a bottle of wine in the corner shop. Red or white? Knowing the effects of red on Angie, knowing Angie knows he knows the effects of red on her and wanting those same effects of red but knowing he should choose white, he tenuously decides on rose! LOL! Meanwhile Angie shores up her courage and gets her book from the office while Hanif is out. She runs into Hanif's mother on the way out. Doesn't sound like Amah Ruparell knows Angie's been sacked. Amah witters on about her beloved son and asking Angie to remind him that he's due at his parents' house tonight at 7 sharp, Hanif arrives. Angie is somewhat amused when his mother lovingly chides him and he submits respectfully. That dinner is the "business" Hanif lied about to break his date with Denise. More later.

Jack has the night off and wants to go see Liz and Jim at the Queen's in hopes of scoring some free ale of his buddy Jim. Betty tries to talk him out of it. Don has invited Martin out because it's Martin's birthday but they don't invite Jack because they're going to the Queen's and don't want Jack embarrassing them with his antics, pressuring Liz and Jim and Don tries to get Jack to see that it's too soon to visit the MacDonalds. Give them a few weeks to settle in.

Sally's had a call and is considering taking on another child to mind. She's not sure she wants to but has agreed to meet Mr. Broughton tonight so she wants Kevin to be there. Kevin of course whines because he was invited to go with Don and Martin but Sally rules the roost. Mr. Joe Broughton is a mild mannered civil servant and Sally ends up agreeing to give it a trial. She wonders where the mum of the little blonde 3 year old boy is and makes it her mission to suss it out.

Emily has a few good lines today, first in the cafe she vents to Alma about Percy rewriting the highway code to suit his own opinions (sounds like my grandfather LOL!) Alma mentions not teaching old dogs new tricks to which Emily wishes she had an old dog to teach, it would probably be more successful than teaching Percy to drive. Later in the pub she and Ken discuss possible summer holiday plans. She isn't' going to go on a motor vacation, certainly not with Mr. Sugden. Ken allows that her influence has mellowed Percy. She wonders. Maybe it's like being in a comedy play, she poses, the audience is in fits of laughter but she's much too close to it too see the humour!

Over in the Queens, Tanya keeps sowing seeds of discontent in Jim's mind, playing on the speed of their receiving managership of the pub. Wilmore must really fancy you! You can see the doubts flash across Jim's face! Don and Martin arrive but insist on buying their own drinks, well Don is paying for Martin's birthday treat. But who shows up? Jack ! As expected, Don and Martin are embarrassed when Jack finagles a free double scotch at Jim's offer. That's why they didn't tell him they were coming here!

Curly arrives at Angie's with the sewing machine, bottle of wine and a hat full of hopes but is deflated to see Steve is there too, helping Angie move some bits of furniture out and into the tshirt unit (which Mike isn't too pleased about but Alma puts her foot down!). She spots the wine and smiles secretively to herself, realizing Curly's motivations!

Denise is finally in a bit better mood at the pub tonight, drinking with Deirdre but Alma happens by and puts her foot right in it, having heard from Angie that Hanif is dining with Mummy tonight. Denise realizes he lied to her and her face is a picture, you know, "I'm good enough to "date" but not good enough to bring home to Mummy!?"

Diane Johnston

Joe Broughton JOHN WHEATLEY (first appearance) Johnathan Broughton TOM LEWIS (first appearance) Mrs. Ruparell SURENDRA KOCHAR
Written by TOM ELLIOTT Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Friday (3550, Friday 4 June 1993)


Originally transmitted: 7, 9, 11, 14 & 16 June 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 22 - Friday 26 May 2000
Episode Numbers: 3551 - 3555

Monday (3551, Monday 7 June 1993)

Liz has been notified by post that she's to take a management hygiene course this week. Jim spitefully bitches that it's Wilmore that wants her to go and he'll probably be there. It's got nothing to do with him, Liz sighs Jim demands that she turn it down, "We" have a pub to run, but she'll have to go if the brewery says so. She points out the painfully obvious "SHE" has a pub to run. Fine then, Jim obstinately decides, he'll just sit down and watch her run it. He takes a seat at a table in the middle of the bar and sarcastically suggests she have the course there in the pub otherwise who'll run it when she's gone?

Tanya flounces in just then, late, and realizes she's walked into a war zone from the nearly visible tension in the air. Liz immediately confronts her about putting ideas in Jim's head about Wilmore and her. Liz makes Tanya recant her insinuations which she does but she sort of sidesteps it a bit. Jim then refuses to fetch some crates from the cellar when asked so Liz, lips tightened, orders Tanya to do it. She whines that it isn't her job. You should have thought of that before you started pouring poison in my husband's ear, is all she gets back so she sulkily heads off. Jim tries to make up, asking what's more important, their marriage or a stupid course. (meaning of course that she should pick him over her new employer's directive, or, in Jim's mind, her new employer!) She sadly states that she'll have to think about it. Not the answer he was expecting. The dormouse has grown claws!

Percy pastes a learner's sticker on Emily's car in preparation for another lesson. Up the road, Sally struggles to get the two smaller children into a buggy but Johnathan breaks away and goes running down the pavement and climbs into Emily's open car door. Sally runs after him, terrified he'll run out into traffic. Percy hollers and grumps, scaring the child while Sally apologizes. Not to worry, the placid Emily soothes, understanding. She uses Percy's agitated state as an attempt at getting out of the driving lesson but Percy insists, and off they go. Sally is now back by her house where Kevin must have run across the road because she'll telling him that Johnathan isn't settling down and she'll have to tell Joe Broughton that he can't keep minding him after today.

Don drops into the salon to have a word with Denise. He hands her a cheque for £3,000, the very same amount she had been telling him she needed to pay back to Neil. She is uncomfortable taking money from a neighbour and wants to think about it so they agree to meet in the pub later.

Emily and Percy pull into what looks like a shell of a building or some such. There does appear to be cars parked in the shadows and it is apparently some distance away from the shops where they are heading but Emily stoutly refuses to go any further and will walk the rest of the way. Sounds like she's had more than enough of Percy's driving lesson for today! There doesn't seem to be any obvious parking or no parking signs and she points out that they aren't obstructing anyone. Even though Percy seems to be a bit dubious, she insists. They're getting out and that's that. There is a small sign but she won't even let Percy go check that out! Percy succumbs to Emily's desperation. "If you say so, Mrs. Bishop, if you say so." When they return later, lo and behold, the wheel is clamped!! Emily tells Deirdre that the small sign off to one side informed them that they must pay 40 quid to unclamp the car. Deirdre thinks there might be a by law in place about displaying parking signs. Emily puts the blame squarely on Percy, she was as we suspected, too exasperated to drive another yard with that man. At the bar Percy is discussing the situation with Raquel, putting himself in the best light possible of course. He told Emily so, after all. He describes Emily as naive and not realizing people clamp cars to bilk money out of folk. He may be right in this circumstance, i fear.

In the pub at lunch, Kevin and Martin discuss little disruptive Johnathan Broughton, surmising he might have a future in football if he keeps up his penchant for kicking the other children. Raquel, now enamoured of the gentlemen's sport of cricket points out that football can be played by a donkey if you point it in the right direction but Cricket is more civilized. In a booth, Don persuades Denise to take the money with a payback scheme of £30 a week and she tentatively accepts. Ivy approaches just then and makes mention of her appointment at the salon later. Don jumps and compliments her hairdo in hopes that she'll not go to Denise's. Ivy's taken aback but pleased that Don is being nice to her for a change but her smile wavers when Denise lets slip about Don's investment. To sidetrack Ivy, Don buys her a drink and the plan works. Ivy's more focussed on Don's seemingly changing attitude. Denise leaves with a flicker of doubt on her face at what she's just witnessed.

At the Queen's at dinnertime, Jim is still sitting at the same table. Wilmore walks in and assumes Jim's on a break and makes himself comfortable at the same table to talk about this course. (oh? Sounds like he might be expecting Jim to go on it instead of Liz?)

When next we return to the Queen's it's just time for afternoon closing but Tanya isn't let out the door until, after a glare from Liz, she tells Jim that she was out of line suggesting Liz had any more to do with Wilmore and she apologizes to both of them. Liz accepts and emasculates her husband with a caustic remark about Jim being born stupid. After Tanya leaves, Jim admits that Wilmore does indeed want him to go on that course, not her. Ah, she says superiorly, then he can't be after your body can he? But Jim's got an answer for that, he figures Wilmore wants him out of the way so he can spend time chatting Liz up. He's baffled when she doesn't rise to the bait this time. Heartsick, disappointed and getting close to fed up, all she can say is "I see."

Ivy arrives at the salon for her trim and set and finds out immediately from Fiona (who's all smiles today) that Don was in earlier. Fiona chatters on about the sights you see on some people's heads round there, citing bad perms and dilapidated beehives as fashion don'ts. Denise comes round the corner and takes over, making small talk about Don, giving Ivy the chance to witter on about Don's compensation money and how she wanted them to start a little business together. But Don is too careful with his money though she doesn't see why they shouldn't spread a little of it around. Denise twigs that Ivy knows nothing about Don's proposed investment.

Sally awkwardly tells Joe that it isn't working out with Johnathan. He's a bit too lively and it upsets the other kids. Joe reveals that another child minder gave him up after only one day and he never said because he didn't want Sally to give up before giving it a try. He lays on the sob story about the missing mother (revealing a deceptively manipulating side of him behind that sweet innocent dull civil servant face). Sally falls for it and decides to give it one more week.

General chit chat in the pub later as Angie talks to Raquel about her budding independent designing. Denise storms in and hands Don back his cheque, refusing to come between a husband and wife.

Now, boys and girls, the powerhouse scene!!!!

The setting is the Queen's just before evening opening. Liz is stalking around the living quarters, fuming and not just because she's sucking on a cigarette. She hands Jim the phone so he can call Wilmore and tell him to leave his wife alone. He thinks she needs protection, so protect her, she challenges. Tell him he thinks Wilmore's persuaded the government to make courses compulsory so Jim can be away leaving the way clear for an advance. Come on, make the call, she goads, protect me! She pushes further, accusing him, he's not jealous of Wilmore, he's jealous of her!! He wants to believe Richard is after her and would let himself believe that she'd rub baby oil on the man in the moon if he thought he could get out of the pub. He doesn't like it that *she's* the one in charge, not him!

The systematic deconstruction of Jim's self esteem and ego is about to begin in earnest. She lays into him, fired up now, he can't take it that she got this job and that she's in charge, her name over the door! The reason Richard..."Richard??" Yes, RICHARD, she emphasizes, and the reason he's sending Jim on the course is because *she* doesn't need it! "I'm good at this and that's what you can't take!" Jim of course denies it but he can barely look at her. He tries to reason that he is only worried about her. But she hisses and spits and calls him a liar for that! A Mean minded gutless liar! (whoah! That was no warning shot!)

She stalks out into the bar to open the doors, followed closely by Jim, whinging and sputtering. She puts him off, because she hasn't got time, she's got a pub to open. He accuses her of not having time for their marriage. She stops short and slams her keys violently on the floor and whirls around, loading up to fire again. When has our marriage had time for ME!!! She's spent years and years and years raising HIS sons while he was away on maneuvers. Living all over and away from her friends and her mother. All for HIM!! She begins to punctuate her rant with bruising smacks to his chest and upper arm. Now it's time for her and what does he do??? Sulk, throw tantrums and tell tales!! Emotionally, he describes his vision, he wanted to do this together, host and hostess. He never thought he'd end up collecting glasses (but that is all part of running a pub you dumb bunny!) She wanted to do this together too, she cries, emotion bubbling over, but he doesn't know what together is, he's the "Great I Am!".

Angry she shoots a final fatal volley ....One.... he doesn't want this to work at all; he wants it to fail like everything else he's ever touched. He's only happy when things are falling apart so he can act like it's him against the universe! Verbally staggering, he protests feebly.

....Two...."I am GOOD at this and THAT'S what you can't STAND! YOU'VE never been any good at ANYTHING!" She walks around the bar, leaving him reeling... his eyes red, his entire being shaken not believing what he's hearing.

....Three....You loused up your business, your job and now you're trying to louse ME up!!! Jim looks like a drowning man desperately searching for a sliver of something to keep him afloat "Don't say that! Please!" he begs but she rages, "This is not the army, this is the REAL WORLD , Jim!!! Broken, he visibly shrinks and looks away from her it total, utter defeat.

Diane Johnston

Written by FRANK COTTRELL BOYCE Directed by JULIAN FARINO

Tuesday (3552, Wednesday 9 June 1993)

It's morning and we're in the living quarters of The Queen's, where Liz talks to Jim about fixing a window that's not closing properly. Jim grumbles that he doesn't want to live in the bar in the first place 'cause it means Liz owes Willmore something. Liz insists again that there's nothing between her and Willmore. Not on her part, maybe, sulks Jim, but there is on Willmore's! He wants to leave. Liz insists she's not going to throw their future away - Jim's just talking rubbish. She then reminds him that he has to go on that hygiene course today. Jim sneers.

Martin drops David off at Sally's. He mentions that for no apparent plot reason at all, Gail is ill and he's going to fill in for her at the Cafe until Phyllis can be located and pressed into service. As he's leaving, Joe Broughton brings Johnathan and drops him off at Madonna Sally's.

In the salon, Denise tenses when Don enters the shop. She is upset about why he doesn't want Ivy to know he's offered to lend her money for the salon and is convinced he must have a shady motive. He assures her he wants to be her friend and nothing more. Fiona arrives and as it's always awkward to talk about money in front of the help, they arrange to meet lunchtime to discuss the loan further. "The MacDonald's pub, The Queen's," Don says, not the Rovers, so that nobody else gets "the wrong impression".

At the Cafe, Phyllis arrives and frees Martin up so he can go home and work on his revision.

Baldwin struts into the garage and asks Kev to book his Jaguar in for a servicing on Monday. He's got business in London and will take the train down while Kev takes care of the car. As Doug glowers at him from a corner, Mike also asks Kev to take care of the "road tax" (presumably the same as North American registration) for him. He hands over the keys and the cheque for payment, noting that the insurance information is in the glove box. Noticing Doug's glare he asks Kevin loudly if "that fella" is earning his keep. Kevin says he thinks he is and Mike continues that Kevin would say that 'cause he's "too sentimental". Once Mike leaves Doug swears that one of these days he'll wipe the smirk off of Baldwin's face. Kev suggests he sell tickets! He then hands the auto paperwork and keys to Doug and tells him to take care of the road tax. Doug balks - "I'm a mechanic, not a messenger boy." Kev makes it clear he's got no choice in the matter. "I'd like to take him for everything he's got," mutters Doug darkly. "Join the queue," advised Kev amiably as he walks away. Doug gazes thoughtfully at the keys in his hand.

Percy and Emily enter the shop; Percy's agitated because Emily's going to the Citizen's Advice Bureau to request advice about the wheel clamp holding her car hostage and she won't let him accompany her! He tries every tactic he can think of, even saying (to Em's annoyance) that they'll take more notice of her with a man with her, but Emily is firm on this one. Fortunately soon after she's gone Percy's attention is distracted and then completely held by some rhubarb, to Deirdre's amusement.

Doug takes off his overalls and puts them in the trunk of Mike's Jag before driving off.

Kevin arrives home for lunch. The children, which Sally says had been as good as gold before his arrival, suddenly start to fuss and make noise, particularly Jonathan. Kevin gets peeved at the ruckus and goes to eat at the Rovers.

Doug is on a Mercedes car lot. A salesman approaches him and admires the Jag, parked nearby. Doug admires the Mercedes. Is Doug interested in trading the Jag? "That's the idea," he replies. The salesman introduces himself as John March. "My name's Baldwin," replies Doug, "M'friends call me Mike."

In the Rovers, Percy bends Kevin's ear, wondering conspiratorially if "you fellows in the trade" have a tool for removing a wheel clamp. "We do. It's called a hacksaw," replies Kevin with a twinkle in his eye. It takes a while and then they get your for destruction of property anyway! Percy leaves in disgust. Jim arrives and explains that he's a student for the day in a nearby college which explains his lunchtime presence in his old digs. Doug shows up and tells Kev that everything went fine with paying Mike's road tax. He returns the keys and asks if he can have his wages early next week. "It's just the one time," he says pleadingly. Kevin reluctantly agrees.

At the end of the bar, Jim and Jack commiserate about these hygiene courses being a waste of time. Jack says how he envies Jim; he's got Liz, the best put in town... Jim looks pained by the irony.

Don and Denise meet in The Queen's. She feel badly about him keeping the money a secret from Ivy. "She's not 'no-one' - she's your wife," she points out. Don explains to Denise that his is a marriage in name only. He asks her to keep this information to herself. "Well, you've cheered me up," Denise replies dryly. "I thought it was only me who had such a disastrous love life." She goes on to tell Don about walking out on her first husband, who was a good man, for Neil. Suddenly embarrassed, she says she doesn't know why she's telling him all this. "That's what friends are for," says Don. "So - do you want this cheque?" She nods. Liz comes over and apologizes for not greeting them earlier and Denise also comments about how lucky Liz and Jim are - "you've got it made!"

Back in the Rovers, Mr. Got-it-made is brooding at the bar. Kev wonders what's on his mind and he asks what Kev would do if someone fancied Sally. "Not much I could do, is there?" Kevin responds pragmatically. "She's a fanciable woman." Why, he wonders, is someone in The Queen's chatting Liz up? He thought that was part and parcel of the pub business. "No, it's not like that," growls Jim. What, then? Mike interrupts and collects his keys from Kevin. One he's gone, Jim asks what if that someone was Kev's' boss? Kev laughs at the idea because Sally can't stand Mike. "Bear with me," Jim says impatiently. What if it *was* your boss and he kept at it and you thought he was getting somewhere? Kev thinks for a second, then replies that he'd thump him one and start looking for a new job, "'cause if I thumped Baldwin, that'd be me job as well." Jim nods thoughtfully, approvingly. "Yeah, it would, wouldn't it? You've earned yourself a pint!"

Joe stops by Sally's to pick up Johnathan. He tells Sally that Johnathan misses his mum, but as for mum, "the boyfriend's welcome to her and she's welcome to him." He says that Kevin resembles the mum's boyfriend and Sally guesses that's why Johnathan doesn't like Kevin.

In the Cafe, Emily tells Alma, Phyllis and Angie that the Citizen's Advice Bureau were very sympathetic but there's nothing anyone can do. Mike arrives and Alma asks if there's anything Emily can do. He blithely says no - the law is on the side of the people who own the property.

Joe leaves Sally's as Kevin arrives. Sal tells him her theory about Johnathan not liking Kevin because of his resemblance to "his mum's fancy man - it's not you, is it?" she teases. Kevin says no, but speaking of fancy men, Jim MacDonald was in the Rover's muttering about someone fancying someone's wife. "Liz?" wonders Sally aloud. Sounded like it, agrees Kevin.

In The Queen's, Liz serves Mr. Findlay, a regular, a chats about his work. Richard Willmore shows up and wonders if Jim's not working tonight. Liz explains he's on the hygiene course. Tania, ears pricked up, listens closely. Have there been any problems? Willmore asks. Liz remembers the window in the living quarters that won't close properly. Seeing as he's' here, Willmore says, he'll have a look at it. They go through. "Did you see that?" snipes Tania acidly to Mr. Findlay. "He can't do enough for her! I wish I had a 'beautiful friendship' like that!"

Back in the Rovers, Gordon is having a drink and wonders if Raquel will be at his cricket match on Sunday. She says that she's starting to think life's too short for cricket. He thought she liked it, he says. She does, she assures him, but she'd like it more if he could sit and watch it with her. "Well, I can't do that if I'm playing, can I?" smiles Gordon. Without a trace of irony she smiles and replies, "Well I don't know, you're the expert on the rules." (LOL!) At the end of the bar, Percy is urging Emily not to give in. She can't do anything, she replies with an exasperated sigh, apparently they've got the law on their side. "What do you want me to do, Mr. Sugden? Go on hunger strike?" "Certainly not, no. Well, not tonight, any road, I've done a rhubarb crumble." (LOL!) "Sometimes one must accept defeat and suffer in silence," she says - with the emphasis on "in silence", clearly for Mr. Sugden's benefit!.

Jim arrives at The Queen's and Tania wonders why he's back so early from his course. "Got a wee bit tedious, didn't it," Jim says testily. "It's been anything *but* tedious here, hasn't it?" Tania coyly asks Mr. Findlay, humiliating Jim further by implying that this stranger knows whatever it is Jim doesn't. "Mr. Willmore's with us again. Liz took him upstairs. I don't think she expected you back quite so soon." Jim brushes past Tania and she smiles wickedly at Findlay. "Naughty Tania," he mock-scolds. "Very naughty."

Jim encounters Liz and Richard Willmore in a hallway. "Oh, Jim," Liz says conversationally, beginning to explain that she was just showing Willmore the window. "Oh yeah. And what else did he want ya to show 'im, eh?" Jim says confrontationally. Liz shakes her head and implores Jim not to do this. "Now you listen to me," Jim says to Wilmore, whose face has changed rapidly from pleasant to surprised to bemused to annoyed to angry. "You might own the brewery and you might own this boozer, but you don't own my wife. And you don't own me. Bastard!" The last word is punctuated with a swift uppercut across Willmore's jaw. He falls to the floor and Liz goes to help him, screaming "What are you doing?" Jim grabs Liz roughly by the arm and pulls her to her feet. "I'm giving that man what he deserves. And I'm making a decision for you and me. We're out of here, Liz, the pair of us. Jim's fixed it for ya." He marches down the hallway as a trembling Liz shakes her head in disbelief, then bows again to aid the still-prone Richard Willmore.

ronniecat

Joe Broughton: JOHN WHEATLEY John Marsh: ANTHONY SCHAEFFER Mr. Findlay: JEREMY PEARCH Richard Willmore: OLIVER BEAMISH Gordon Blinkhorn: MARK CHATTERTON Johnathan Broughton: TOM LEWIS
Written by JULIAN FARINO Directed by JOHN STEVENSON

Wednesday (3553, Friday 11 June 1993)

Liz dials home and waits through nearly half a dozen rings before Steve finally answers. In response to his mom's questions, he tells her that Jim came home late the night before -- plastered. He asks why Jim is sleeping at home instead of at The Queen's, and then answers his own question: "you've had a barny." Liz seems unwilling to give any details, and will only tell Steve that his dad "operates on a quarter inch fuse." Steve can't understand why his parents would be arguing, and tells his mom that he thought The Queen's was the best thing that happened for them. "So did I" says Liz dejectedly before hanging up.

At the Cafe, Emily tells Alma and Phyllis that she went to the Citizens Advisory about her car being clamped, but was told that if the person owns the property, they're well within their rights. Alma's response is that she'd simply chuck a brick through one of their windows, but Emily could never condone that sort of behaviour. Meanwhile, Angie comes down from her flat and Phyllis takes the mickey by teasing her about being young, single, and able to sleep in whenever she wants. Angie snaps at her that she's been up since 6:00 AM that morning, slogging over her sewing machine.

Tania is polishing glasses when Liz comes into the bar area. She innocently asks if "everything is alright, then?" "Why shouldn't it be?" responds Liz. "It's just that Mr. Willmore seemed a little bit put out when he left," says Tania, angling for more information, but Liz will only tell her there was "a slight misunderstanding -- but it'll all get sorted." "Oh, of course it will," purrs Tania, adding that "there's bound to be differences of opinion, with you being you and all that." Instead of smacking her, Liz bites her tongue and heads for the back. Bob passes her on his way in, and Tania can't wait to tell him that he missed "a right ruckus last night. Her old man dotted Willmore! He came out with a face like thunder," she laughs menacingly, and tells Bob that apparently Jim thinks Willmore is interested in his missus. Bob thinks Jim is "way off base," since the only thing that gets "old boot-face" excited is a healthy balance sheet.

Back on Coronation Street, a hung-over Jim sits at the dining room table looking like death warmed over. Steve asks if he shouldn't be at The Queen's, and when he gets no response, he wonders about all the noise Jim made when he finally came home the night before. "I stubbed me toe," is Jim's poor excuse. Steve tells him that Liz has already rung, looking for Jim, and he frankly tells his dad that he's worried about the situation. "It's between me and your mother" is all Jim will offer.

Alma goes upstairs to check on Angie, and finds her busy at the sewing machine. When she asks how it's going, Angie doesn't look up from her work, but tells her rather pointedly that she's trying to make some money. Alma tries to cheer her up by telling her that she's a bright girl and is bound to find another job soon, but Angie will only respond that she's busy. In an attempt at humour, Alma pats Angie's mannequin on the chest and says that the only problem with it is that it should be taller, thinner, and under 21. Angie is not amused.

At the Rovers Return, the big topic of conversation is the legality of clamping Emily's car. She tries to explain what she's been told by the Citizens Advisory, and tells the others that she'll be picking up her car later that day.

Jim calls The Queen's and asks Tania to get Liz for him. Tania tells him that Liz isn't there and she doesn't know where she's gone. Jim hangs up with a puzzled look on his face.

Percy and Emily arrive at the garage where her car was clamped, and while the clamp is being removed, Percy rails at the mechanic about it being wrong to have such a tiny sign posted. Emily shushes Percy and tells him there's no point in giving the young man grief for only doing his job. Seconds later, a young woman walks into the garage and is shocked to find her car has been clamped too. Emily points out the small "no parking" notification on the wall, and the upset woman doesn't know what she's going to do now -- she needs to pick up her baby from the sitter, and her husband will "go potty" when he learns of the forty quid expense for unclamping the car. Meanwhile another motorist pulls into the garage, and Emily rushes over to inform him that he can't park there. "If I had my way, no one would ever park here again," she tells Percy.

Back at the Rovers Return, Angie asks Steve if he could do her a favour. She's just finished a jacket that she designed herself, and all she wants him to do is wear it when he goes to the clubs. When people ask where he got it, he can refer them back to her and hopefully drum up some business. Mike Baldwin comes in, in a bit of a testy mood, sarcastically asking where Steve has been all morning, and tearing a strip off Doug for spending too much time in the boozer. Jim pops in too, to "catch up on a bit of crack," and Steve asks him again why he isn't at The Queen's. "Because Liz will be showing up here" is Jim's reply.

Meanwhile, a sheepish Liz has arrived at Richard Willmore's office. Willmore is surprised to see her, since he expected a visit from Jim to offer an apology for what transpired the night before. Liz explains that Jim got it into his head that Richard fancied her, and now she's terribly embarrassed because she doesn't know where Jim got that idea. She admits that Jim has a tendency to jump to conclusions. Now she wonders when Willmore expects her to move out, and Willmore rebuts that she's the one jumping to conclusions now. He reminds her that Newton & Ridley have a contract with her, and the problem they have at the moment is with her husband, not her.

Steve is disappointed to find that Jim is still drinking when he arrives home -- he thought that things would be cleared up by then. Jim takes the opportunity to tell Steve that his mother isn't a saint, but their conversation is interrupted by a knock at the door. It's Angie with the jacket, and she bursts into the living room not realizing that she's interrupted a family discussion. She asks Steve to be careful not to get beer stains on the jacket, and to tell anyone who's interested that it costs 80 quid. She asks Steve to try it on, but he puts her off by mumbling that it will fit. Sensing something's up, Angie leaves, and Steve asks his dad if he's going to go around and sort things out. "Certainly not," is Jim's response, adding once again that this is "between me and your mother."

Joe Broughton arrives at the Websters' to pick-up Jonathan, and asks if he's been a good boy that day. Sally tells him that Jonathan is getting better, and Joe tells her of an incident where Jonathan stuffed his pockets with worms and then presented them to his mom -- "no wonder she ran off," he laughs. He begins to write a cheque for the week, but Sally reminds him that he agreed to pay cash. She explains that Gail gives her cash as well, so that cheques don't go through her bank account. When she asks Joe what exactly his job is within the civil service, she's a little shocked to learn he's a tax inspector!

Steve arrives at The Queen's and asks his mom if he can have "a word." While they go into the back, Tania goes over to Bob and whispers that Steve must be there to talk about his dad. In the back, Steve makes it clear that he wants to know what's going on. His dad won't tell him anything, and keeps insisting that it's between him and Liz. Liz confesses that Jim "thumped somebody. If it were in the heat of the moment, that'd be one thing, but he did it for his own selfish reasons."

Back at the Rovers, Sally tells Martin that she nearly died whe she learned that Joe was a tax inspector -- he's going to think that Sally is "doing a fiddle" by asking for cash. Martin points out that it's a little unlikely that Joe would turn her in, given the problems he's had finding a care-giver for Jonathan. Elsewhere in the pub, Emily tells Deirdre that she warned two other drivers not to park their cars in the garage before she left with her unclamped car.

Alma arrives unexpectedly at Angie's flat, bearing a chicken vindaloo take-away and a bottle of white wine. As Angie gets dishes and cutlery from the kitchen, Alma opens the wine and asks about Angie's depression. At first Angie denies it, but realizing that she can't fool Alma, she admits that she feels like a failure. When she was in college, she thought she was special -- she was going to have an amazing career and meet an equally amazing man. Now she's unemployed and has been dumped by "another woman's reject." She doesn't know why it took her so long to admit that Denise would always be number one in Neil's affections. Alma tells her of the time she slashed Jackie Ingram's duvet in a bid to get even with Mike -- even then, she claimed she was happy. In fact, she was miserable and "lonely as hell, too." She advises Angie not to shut herself up in the flat and cut herself off from others. As Angie brushes tears away, she admits that for a chip-fryer, Alma is one good psychologist.

The Queen's has closed for the day, and as the staff do their final chores, Tania asks if Liz is planning to stay on. "Why shouldn't I?" snaps Liz. There's a banging on the door, Bob lets Jim in, and he and Tania beat a hasty retreat. After a few awkward moments of silence, Jim finally tells Liz that he waited all day for her to come home. "You didn't really expect me to come round to you, after what you did," is Liz' understandable response. Jim tries to defend his actions by saying that he only did what any man would do, but Liz doesn't accept that. "Unlike you," she replies, "Richard Willmore has never been anything but a gentleman." Jim sticks to his guns, claiming that if Willmore hasn't made his move yet, he'll do it eventually. "Why do you think he has you here?" Liz tries again to make him realize that *they* got the pub together, but Jim doesn't see it that way. It's her name above the door, and before long, he'll be known as "Mr. Liz MacDonald." "So that's what this is all about," Liz replies with a heavy sigh.

Out of patience with the discussion, Liz tells Jim that if it were his name above the door, she'd be proud of him and would support him. Why can't he do the same for her? His pathetic answer: "I'm a man, love." "Yes," agrees Liz, "one out of the dark ages." Seeing that the argument is going nowhere, she tells him she's tired and is going to bed. Jim is surprised that she isn't coming home with him, and asks how much notice Willmore gave her. He's even more surprised to learn that Willmore didn't fire her. "The decision (to stay) is mine," Liz informs him coldly -- "funny enough, you just made it easier. I still love you," she tells him in a resigned tone, "but I'm staying here." Jim stares at her for a few seconds before walking away. As he closes the door, Liz leans on the wall and cries.

Heather Morlan

Written by ADELE ROSE Directed by JULIAN FARINO

Thursday (3554, Monday 14 June 1993)

Joe pays sally by cheque but promises to pay cash next week. Sally nervously makes excuses why she wants cash but admits to him that it's because he's a tax inspector. But Joe knows she's declaring it honestly, not trying to hide it and gives her a few tax tips, like don't declare it as part of Kevin's income or she'll have to pay tax on it!

Doug pleads to Kevin to have his wages early this week., like today? Kevin gives him a hard time for not being able to get his life together. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right, Can I have me wages? Kevin sighs and says he'll see.

Audrey asks the question that's probably on everyone's mind when she asks Steve if his dad isn't working at the Queen's anymore? Steve cannily sidesteps a direct answer and leaves Audrey to speculate what's going on. Alf doesn't want to know and doesn't care to join in the gossip. That's because he never knows what's going on right under his nose anyway, Audrey scoffs. She teases him, "You could walk through an abattoir and never smell blood!"

Liz has another meeting with Wilmore about her future. She tells him she'd like to carry on which is fine by him but he lays it out for her. No, no, no, not THAT! (not yet anyway! ) He tells her that since Jim was not the landlord or the manager, he's casual labour and when casual labour stuffs up they aren't allowed on the premises after that. She agrees. He warns her that if Jim shows any more violent behavior she is expected to get an injunction against him. She agrees.

Andy is back from uni unexpectedly. He and Steve are in the cafe. Alma greets Andy, surprised he's back so soon and reminisces about a fella she went out with who was in uni, wore a long scarf and made her listen to Chris Barber LP's (Jazz) none of which means anything to a lad that wasn't born at the time. Andy and Steve sit together and Andy finds out about Liz and Jim's bust up. Dad thumped someone, nobody will tell him who and Mum isn't giving out too many details other than she's staying in the pub and he's home getting tanked up. Andy doesn't see this as a very conducive atmosphere to revising for his exams, which was why he came home, but Steve wants his brother's help. He always says the wrong thing but Andy's much more clever. Just then Big Jim enters to borrow Steve's car.

Mike reschedules the Jag's service for Wednesday, a point which seems to interest Doug overly. Doug even attempts to persuade him to leave it today but isn't successful and doesn't push it. He doesn't even mind that Kevin forgot to ask Mike about Doug's wages sub. He's definitely got something on his mind.

At the Queen's, Liz is told by a customer that there's some Irish fella in a car outside asking for her. Jim, of course. She goes outside and tells him the brewery has barred him. That's fine by him, he has no intention of setting foot in the place and wonders how much longer they're going to carry on being stupid? She gets in the car to talk and he even apologizes for thumping Wilmore and losing his temper. But she knows if she goes home to him, which is what he thinks and what he wants, he'll have won the argument and he has no idea what she's on about. He pleads for her to come back to the way they used to be. She points out that they way they used to be was her buckling under, with no life of her own. He realizes she wants her independence, (condescending eejit) but she calls him on that attitude and tells him that she's staying put with the brewery's blessing. This lights the spark again and he starts ranting about Liz's "fancy man" all over again. She climbs out of the car and gives him fair warning about the injunction. You want to know what he thinks? Jim hollers. Not particularly, but he tells her anyway, As far as he's concerned her Fancy man can put her name above the door or the gates of Hell!!! She storms off but as far as I'm concerned Beverly Callard missed the boat when she doesn't punctuate that argument by slamming the car door. In fact she didn't even close it!

Doug calls the car salesman at the Mercedes dealership where he was looking at cars last week and pretending to be Mike. He checks up on the installation of the fancy options and puts off picking it up until later in the week (Wednesday perhaps?) Kevin has overheard Doug talking but not what he's said and jokes that Doug is fitting himself up with a bit of all right for the weekend. Doug whole heartedly agrees.

Now there's an unexpected shift of storyline we are transported to Reg's office listening in on a discussion between Reg and Brendan Scott. They are discussing Reg's application for a "golden handshake" which was somewhat of a surprise at head office. Curly interrupts with some lame and obviously prearranged excuse but is summarily dismissed by Reg. Reg reveals that he has plans to buy a small shop with his severance, carving himself out a little niche. Brendan feigns shock whilst prying more details out of Reg who says he plans to buy cheap, ginger it up using his experience and sell it high, moving on. Intriguing, Brendan smarms but can't get the exact location of the shop out of Reg.

Andy drops in to see his mother who is bent over the books in the back. She wants to know how he is but he wants to know what's going on. She makes vague noises, only saying that it started off about one thing and ended up about everything else, same as all their rows. She's not forgiving him this time, it's that serious. He relates Steve's theory that Jim didn't like it not being the boss. Her temper flares and she rhetorically demands to know why she should give it all up?

Another abrupt change and we are in the Salon as the lovely Hanif enters, seeing as Denise won't take any of his calls. As they're just closed, Denise tells Fiona to leave without finishing the clean up. Fiona does, smirking at Hanif as she passes him in the doorway. He admits to Denise that he was ungracious about the loan. That's putting it mildly since she seems to recall he thought she was only after his money all along. She tells him that she's got the money from somewhere else and he can go jump in the lake. He arrogantly decides they can just make it up and asks her out but she firmly rejects him.

Brendan Scott has a plan. He's got Curly in the Rovers planning to worm Reg's plans out of him. Raquel doesn't even remember him at first, a bit of a bruise to the ego. Mike is there, and offers to buy Kevin and Doug a drink. This is a rare occasion and they don't turn down the offer. Mike is in a good mood, I didn't catch why unless he made a good business deal that afternoon. He is also banging on about today's date, June 14 and thinking it is Bastille Day but Kevin and then Curly correct him that the actual date is July 14. Don't ask me what that was all about. Curly and Brendan sit in a booth, Curly nervously appreciating all the attention being paid him by an area manager. Brendan tempts Curly with the chalice of power and Curly caves.

Meanwhile, Emily arrives, all out of sorts. Mike finds out that she's spent the day camped out in front of the area where her car was clamped warning other drivers away and had been hassled by the owners. But she's got a bee in her bonnet and a crusade to run and isn't giving up.

Not long after, Reg drives up and spies Brandon pacing around the corner shop, eyeing it up and down. Reg realizes that Curly was the weak link Brendan of course has no wish to be negative, but seriously implies that Reg has overpaid and is out of his tiny mind. He drives away and Reg twitches uncertainly as Jim arrives home behind him.

Inside Number 11, the boys wait. Jim's angry and loaded for bear, aggressive and strutting around the room with a big righteous on him, just trying to pick a fight. Andy admits he went to see Liz. Oh well, you must know everything, now, rants Jim, just itching for an argument and fueled by more than one or two jars. He verbally attacks Andy, sure he's going to take his mother's side like Steve already has. Andy tries to find out his father's side. Mum reckons he thumped the boss to get them both the sack. Why Dad? Jim paces and snarls defensively, you both think he's to blame, that he resents her getting something for herself, is that right?? Oh, no, he's going to slag her off to her own sons isn't he? Oh yes he is. "How was I meant to get the job, Sonny Boy? I wasn't sleeping with the boss!!!" Jim spitefully spits. Steve immediately leaves in disgust. Andy tries to reason and so does Jim. He's barred, Wilmore has a black eye and a fat lip and she still has a job. What does that say? Jim insists, "Your mother is a Hoor, Son!" Andy leaves wordlessly with a resentful look. Jim sits heavily down at the table and whispers hotly, "She's a Hoor!"

Diane Johnston

Mr. Findlay JEREMY PEARCE
Written by JULIAN ROACH Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Friday (3555, Wednesday 16 June 1993)


Originally transmitted: 18, 21, 23, 25 & 28 June 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 29 May - Friday 2 June 2000
Episode Numbers: 3556 - 3560

Monday (3556, Friday 18 June 1993)

Our day begins in the Queen's where the lads are having breakfast. They've told Liz about Jim's drunken tirade the night before which drove them out. Liz muses that Jim sees the lads as taking sides. They are, avers Steve. They all agree that besides the whiskey bottle, Jim is his own worst enemy and Liz assures the boys that they can stay there if they want and tells them about the injunction that the brewery will file if Jim tries to come on the premises. This all gives Andy food for thought and he decides he's going to move back home as he's back to college on Monday anyway. It's party for his father's sake, it might help if Jim doesn't' think they are all lined up against him. Partly it's so that he can study with fewer distractions.

Mike drops off the car and keys to the garage. Doug has a few smart ass remarks as usual. Kevin drives Mike to the station and in the car Mike starts making noises about sacking Doug (not soon enough, Sunshine!) He'll think about it on the train.

Percy notices Jim picking up the milk and comments that he thought Jim was in town at that pub. Jim thought he was too, goes to show you that things change and goes back inside.

Percy was heading down to the corner shop where Alf and Audrey are practically jumping for joy because Alf's had a fellow on the phone who is interested in buying the shop for the full asking price! He's going to come over this morning to have a look and a talk! Percy interrupts to pay for his loaf and asks Alf to have a word with Emily, hoping Alf can talk Emily into giving up this business over the clamping company. Alf doesn't want to know and doesn't have the time. Even Audrey is too delighted to pay much notice to Percy's over protectiveness and fears that the stress will bring Emily's nervous problem back on.

Curly approaches Maureen, wondering if there's been any news. There hasn't she informs him just as Reg wobbles up to report that he's going to see Alf at dinnertime to see if Alf will accept his reduced offer. Curly of course, has a higher stake in all this, hoping for promotion into Reg's job. Reg confidently tells Maureen they will have something to celebrate this afternoon!

Jim is surprised to see Andy arrive back, bag and baggage and it wipes the snarl off his face when he realizes Andy wants to stay, not clear out the rest of his wardrobe. Jim hesitantly asks after Liz. Andy judges that she's not as good as she's letting on but the news that Steve is staying put gives Jim the leg back up onto the high horse and he sarcastically makes remarks about Liz and her fancy man. Andy takes none of that. Jim starts strutting again, sober this time, making cocky statements about living the single life with no responsibilities. He might even take a walk down to the cenotaph and have a few jars with the old fellas and learn how to live life with a hold in "me pocket". I am guessing this refers to a homeless shelter or hangout as Andy eyes his rumpled and unshaven father and disdainfully says "Well you certainly look the part!" Like a bucket of cold water melting the wicked witch down to size, Jim visibly shrinks. But it's hit home as intended. Andy gets settled in at the table to work and Jim, humbled, decides to go get cleaned up, clapping his son on the shoulder in silent gesture of apology (perhaps?) as he passes by.

Percy tries again to dissuade Emily from her crusade. She insists her mental stability is not at risk and she intends to see justice done. He needn't accompany if he wants and perhaps he shouldn't at his age. But he's ever the watchdog and will stand by her side, protectively.

In the pub at dinnertime, Doug arrives after Kevin as he had had a phone call to make, sorting something out. Kevin warns him that Baldwin's got his beady eye on him but Doug isn't bothered as he flirts with Raquel, asking her to run away to Spain or somewhere with him to start over. She flatly refuses. Doug tells Kevin he'll test drive the Jag this afternoon but nearly has apoplexy when Kevin offers to do it himself. He blusters defensively and manages to put Kevin off.

T'other side of the bar, Don has arrived and is pleased to see Denise there but his face falls when, after a warm greeting, he discovers she's there with Fiona and he declines to join them. His eyes follow her progress back across the bar while making idle small talk with Betty. Fiona is egging Denise on to call Hanif and make it up with him. Denise had already pretty much decided to do that anyway. Fiona admires Denise's confidence that Hanif will come running back. Denise gives her some advice, Men are put on this earth for our pleasure and amusement! You can't knock them around or abuse them but like a pet, you got to show them who's boss! (Here! Here!!!)

Oooh I've been waiting for this scene! Reg glides into the sop, smug, confident and charming. Audrey, not nearly able to hide her obvious pleasure at what's about to happen, gleefully calls "Aaaaaa - llllfff!" (That two syllable singsong call that you do!) Reg begins to apologize to her for reducing his offer but what with the recession and the economy Alf interrupts and tells Reg he's too late, the shop is sold to someone paying full price, he's even shook hands on it. Reg pales and sputters that Alf should have come back to him first (yes, actually he probably should have done, as a courtesy for first refusal, I think) but as he tries to up his offer, Brendan Scott oozes from the back room and Alf explains that Mr. Scott's bought the shop! Brendan, in his oily voice, drops the rest of the bomb. He's taken the one and only redundancy package on offer (it started off as many layoffs and redundancies and now it was only one?). He's very grateful to Reg for letting him know about the shop being on the market. No hard feelings, I trust? All Reg can do is start bobbing his head about on it's stem like that lickle dog on the back deck of a car!

Jim has made his way to the garage and tells Kevin that he and Liz are as good as split. Kevin is gobsmacked. He can't picture them apart, just like he couldn't' picture he and Sally apart no matter how hard he tries (think a little harder!) Things change, Jim offers bitterly, supposing it is what he wants (more like he didn't have any choice) but Kevin recognizes that it goes deeper than the surface things Jim is saying. Doug emerges just then to let Kevin know that he's taking the Jag for the test run. He'll treat it just like his own (more than you know!) He leaves and Jim and Kevin continue their conversation. Jim asks Kevin if he'd take Sally back if she'd been messing with another bloke. Realizing the implications of this for Jim, but lacking the ability to foretell his own future, Kevin thinks for a minute and says he would if she wanted to come back. He'd like to think he would, at least. (NOT! Can you say "double standard", Kevin?) Different when it actually happens, Jim sighs. Aye.

In Bettabuys, Reg is spewing the whole outrage to Maureen, the betrayal of a colleague, the manipulation. Curly bounces up hopefully just after Reg has been ranting about trusting nobody especially in this company. Bad timing there. He's dismayed as well to hear about Brendan Scott's maneuver and what it means to him and his non-promotion. Reg loses it, hysterically accusing Curly of wanting the coat of his back, as he pulls it off to offer it to a passing customer, revealing fetching red braces, I might add. He then directs Curly to the Kitchen Wares aisle to get a knife to add to the others in his back! Beside himself, Reg staggers, weaving away down the aisle, inconsolable.

We overhear Denise on the phone making a date with Hanif for that night so she's managed to talk him round.

Kevin is getting nervous. He and Jim have been talking and drinking tea for an hour and a half and Doug is still missing with the Jag. They speculate that Doug has gone for a joyride which, Kevin darkly predicts will get him sacked for sure. Doug is, in fact, at the Mercedes dealership, signing away the Jaguar. He's about to sign the paperwork for the financing on a new royal blue two door sporty model Merc when the mobile rings in the Jag. It's Kevin and Doug, wearing a particularly ugly lilac coloured suite which isn't going to fool any slick dealer that he can afford that kind of car, spins Kevin a yarn about Mike ringing him on the mobile and asking him to pick him up at the train, having returned early. He's sitting at the carpark in Picadilly right now waiting! Kevin buys it though grouses about not being called by either Doug or Mike. Jim decides he's taken up enough of Kevin's time and gets on his way. Kevin encouragingly tells Jim that Liz will be back but it's clear Jim isn't holding out any hopes.

Brendan and Alf confer and we find out their solicitors are sorting out the paperwork. Alf and Audrey wonder if the odd Mr. Scott will be liked by the neighbours. Not as much as they like him, Alf predicts and they won't know what they had until they lost him!

When next we see Jim, he's peeling spuds over the sink. The phone rings and Andy takes the call from Liz, closing the door between the front and living rooms so he can talk. He tells his mother that Jim hasn't been drinking, he doesn't think and seems ok. He's making the tea right now. She declines to have a word and rings off asking him to look after his father if he can. This seems to be the real turning point in Liz's image as she is smoking like a chimney these days and her skirts have gotten shorter, heels higher and clothes in general tighter and sexier. Anyway, Andy lies and tells Jim that Liz was too busy to talk to him, which only incites a few more sarcastic snipes at "yer man". Andy leaves the room in renewed disgust.

In the pub, Hanif and Denise are having a drink before they go to dinner. I must say that though Denise's makeup and sometimes her hair look nice all done up, she has the most atrocious taste in dress fabric prints! This one is full of bright red cabbage roses I think! Hanif doesn't seem to mind though. Over at the bar, Don and Ken listen to Percy's ranting about Emily's crusade. Denise and Hanif make their way to the door, stopping for a moment to greet and introduce Don to the lovely Hanif. Don's face falls and it's pretty clear he's jealous. Denise doesn't really see it but I think Hanif does, even if subconsciously as he wraps a protective (and possessive?) arm around her to lead her out. Raquel makes a remark about the kind of men Denise seems to like, handsome and rich which causes Don to snap at her for minding other people's business. Just making conversation, Raquel defends. Well change the subject, Don snarls, to something you know something about!

Down the road, Sally leads Mike in to the living room where Kevin is dozing on the settee. Mike is there to pick up his car. Kevin, confused, thought he already had it. He explains that Doug called and said he was picking up Mike at the train station at his request. Well as you can see, Mike is here now, having taking a cab from the station! Mike realizes something's dodgey when he calls the mobile only to find out it's been switched off. Where d'you think he'd be?

Where he'd be is laughing, behind the wheel of his ill gotten Merc, cruising down the motorway to some loud driving music. He turns off to a side road and disappears over the hill, cackling over having got one over on Mike Baldwin.

Diane Johnston

John Marsh ANTHONY SCHAEFFER Last appearance of Doug Murray, BRIAN HIBBERD
Written by PETER WHALLEY Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Tuesday (3557, Monday 21 June 1993)

It's morning at the Baldwins', and Mike is still stunned by the loss of his Jaguar. He can't stand the thought of that "slimy little toad" Doug behind the wheel of his car. He tells Alma in disbelief that he even paid Doug to service the Jag so it'd be in tip-top shape for him to nick!

Andy MacDonald is packing a bag to head back to University and tells his father he is going to see Liz before he heads back. Jim sarcastically accuses Andy of going to give Liz a report on him. Andy refuses to rise to the bait. As he leaves, Jim says that if Liz does ask, Andy should tell her he's fit and well and looking for a job, and when he gets one there's no telling what will happen 'cause he's got his whole life to look forward to! Andy wonders if he should tell her that - or the truth. Tell her whatever he likes, says Jim, but there's one thing he should tell her, that she must be more clever than Jim to get the boys on her side "after what she's been up to". Andy leaves without a word and Jim grimaces in self-loathing when he realizes how the exchange sounded.

Tracy Barlow is buying a new pen from Rita in preparation for writing her last exam. She leaves just as Reg enters and immediately begins a tirade against Alf Roberts for accepting a last-minute offer and selling the shop to someone other than Reg himself. After all Alf Roberts' good works, this is the dirty trick he will be remembered for, Reg claims. After he whirls back outside, Mavis notes with typical understatement that "some people take disappointment badly". Rita wonders if they're out of sugar, cream - anything for an excuse to nip over the road and find out from Alf what's up. She gives up trying and says she'll think of something there.

In the Mini Mart Doug's runner in Baldwin's Jag is all the chat. Rita enters and bluntly tells Alf that she was going to pretend she had sommat to buy and bring the conversation around to it, but frankly she's too tired, so she's just going to ask - who's he sold the shop to? Brendan Scott, Alf confirms. Reg, he says, simply didn't want to pay the asking price. Deirdre tells Rita she isn't sure yet whether this is good news or bad for her as an employee.

Emily is writing a letter on her dining room table and Percy does his best to stick his nose into it. She finally tells him it's a letter to the paper, The Weatherfield Gazette, about the car clamp operation. Percy disapproves. She points out that it'll be her name under the letter, not his. It isn't that, says Perc - it's the way this is "taking over your life... becoming an obsession". "Is it?" wonders Emily disingenuously. "We all have those, Mr. Sugden... and just as I allow you yours, you won't mind if I continue with mine!"

Andy's visiting with Liz at The Queen's. He does give a brief report on Jim, finishing by wondering what she's going to do. "Me?" asks Liz. "It's going to have to be you, isn't it?" says Andy resignedly. "Oh yeah. 'Course," replies Liz bitterly. She laments that Jim has ruined everything. They could've been set for life at The Queen's, she sighs, if not for his stupid jealousy. He hasn't been easy to be married to, she tells Andy. It's very tempting, she admits, to just let him go if he wants to. "But he doesn't want to," protests Andy. "Did he say that?" she asks, and Andy doesn't reply. "No. No, he wouldn't, would he?... He'll just sit there waiting for me." "Yeah," Andy agrees sadly. "Well. He's going to have a lot longer wait than he bargained for," says Liz with determination.

In the Cafe, Alma and Gail talk about the auto theft. They seem to be treating it as a bit of a joke and justify it by noting that it's not a violent crime after all. Alma speaks rather fondly of the car, which was lovely, but she sure doesn't miss the mobile phone Mike always carries, which was in the car! Mike keeps reaching for it and it isn't there, she laughs, demonstrating by groping at an imaginary inside-jacket pocket to Gail's amusement. Mike comes in and Gail nudges Alma to get serious. He rather pathetically tells Alma he has given the police the Cafe number as a daytime phone number as "I don't have me mobile." "Oh, do you not?" asks Alma, feigning innocence.

In the Rovers Percy complains to Mavis and Jack that Emily won't give up her campaign until she thinks she's won it. Therefore, he concludes, they'd better make her think she's won it! (Uh-oh.)

Mike drives up to the Garage in a ratty, nondescript little grey subcompact, much to Kevin and Jim's amusement. [Jim, having blown his own chances at a successful career, seems to be intent on hanging about all day ensuring nobody else has one either.] The garage phone rings and it's for Mike. It turns out to be Mr. Marsh, the salesman at the Mercedes dealership. "Mr. Baldwin" left his driving gloves in the car when he traded it. Would he like them back. Mike is stunned. "*My* car? Jaguar?" he asks in disbelief, rattling off the plate number. Yes, of course, says Marsh, a bit baffled at "Mr. Baldwin's" reaction. Mike plays it cool, asking if Marsh can hold the gloves - he'll be there straightaway.

At Emily's house, Percy counts out £60 in notes and puts them into an envelope, swearing the budgie to secrecy as he does so. He places the envelope on the sideboard.

In the Bettabuys stockroom, Curly takes inventory while Reg laments that he is worried about the redundancy announcements tomorrow. Curly thought Reg *wanted* them to make him redundant. That was when he thought he was going to buy Alf's shop, Reg says testily. Now he could end up with nothing. He should've been content, he chastises himself, but he wanted more.

At the Mercedes dealership Mike is showing his credit cards and ID to a staggered John Marsh. Marsh says he'll have to get the police involved and Mike assures him he already has. He admires his "baby", complimenting Marsh on the dealership renewal job - she hasn't looked this good since he bought 'er!

Emily comes home and Percy tells her she's just missed a man from the wheel clamping operation. He left her this envelope and said how much he regretted the inconvenience Emily had suffered. Emily opens the envelope we earlier saw Percy prepare, and counts out the bills with surprise. "Your campaign's been a success," says Percy triumphantly, urging her to "rest on her laurels". "How did they know where I live?" wonders Emily. Oh, someone will have told them, says Percy vaguely. Why wouldn't they give her the money at the car park - she's been picketing there. Why come to her house? she wonders. "What do these things matter?" says Percy nervously. They admitted they were wrong; she won! Did they mention the signs? Are they going to alter them? she asks. Yes, yes, they did and they will, Percy assures her. She seems satisfied, then realizes something - the letter to the newspaper. She's already posted it! And now the parking people have made amends. Perhaps, she says, she could go to the Gazette and ask them not to publish the letter. "Yes, yes," Percy says with relief.

In the Mini Mart, Deirdre informs Ken he'll have a new landlord. Jim comes in and bemoans the perils of shopping for one. Ken leaves just as Steve appears in the shop door. "Well, looks who's here," Jim says jovially, "One of my wee lads." Steve stops when he sees Jim, looks embarrassed, and mumbles, "Uh, no, I'll come back later." Jim looks at Deirdre with chagrin. "Well, what do you think, d'you think it was you he didn't want to speak to, or d'you think it was me?"

At the Mercedes lot, a police Sergeant takes notes and tries to get the Mr. Baldwins and the cars straight. This isn't the first such case he's seen, he says. Mr. Marsh pleads with Mike to leave the car on the lot overnight - he's called the insurance agent and he thinks things will be easier if he can show the agent the car in the morning. (?) Mike agrees to leave it overnight. Marsh appreciates it. "I can take the phone, though, can't I?" he asks anxiously. "It's your phone!" says Marsh with a rueful laugh.

Steve is visiting his mum at The Queen's. [I guess that makes her The Queen's Mum.] He's upset with his father and Liz reminds him that "your father is not the enemy." She knows he's talking that way because he thinks it's what she wants to hear, but he's wrong. Even if they separate permanently, she says, she wants Andy and Steve to maintain their relationship with Jim.

Deirdre is home from work and tells Tracy that Doug ran off with Mike Baldwin's car. "Nice people we know," she comments. Tracy claims that she never really liked Doug anyway, which gives Deirdre a laugh. Tracy then breaks the news to her mum that she doesn't want to return to school next term. Deirdre says she thought they were going to wait for exam results to discuss this, but Tracy says whatever her exam results, she'll feel the same. Deirdre points out that nearly everyone wants to leave school - she did, too. She then reminds Tracy that she's going to have to tell Ken. Tracy has a go at suggesting Deirdre tell him. "Me? Tell your father you're leaving school? You should've gotten Doug Murray to do it - just before he took Mike's car!"

Reg and Curly enter the Rovers. Reg, as usual, enters talking. He accuses Curly of only pretending to be sympathetic to his layoff fears, while secretly gloating because by tomorrow "I'll be out and you'll be in," and Curly's always wanted Reg's position. "Be honest," he orders, "you want the desk. You want the title. You want the power. Yes?" "Yes," Curly admits tentatively. "Do you know," cries Reg bitterly, "that's one of the nastiest things I've ever heard anyone say, is that!" "But-" sputters Curly, "but you said 'be honest'!" "Yes! Be honest about how much you're going to miss me! Be honest about how much you want me to stay!" "All right, we'll miss you," says Curly, exasperated. "Too late now," growls Reg.

Mike tells Alma and Rita about the rediscovery of his car. Why did Doug leave it at a dealership? they wonder. He was either greedy or stupid, explains Mike; he'd used it as a downpayment on one twice as expensive. He pats himself on the back for doing John Marsh a favour by leaving the car for the insurance fellow. Just then, his cell phone rings. "Ooh, got that back too!" he says gleefully, eyes lighting up as he reaches for his electronic talisman.

At Emily's, Percy reads the paper as Emily clears the tea plates. She excitedly tells Percy that when she went to the Gazette and explained to them about the wheel clamping people apologizing and making retribution, they not only agreed not to print her letter but want to do an article on it! They're going to interview her - it's the biggest story they've had in ages! [Wow. You go, Weatherfield Gazette!] "You won't want that, will you," says Percy weakly. "All that publicity..." Emily doesn't mind: "Publicity is what I was after!" Percy looks very uncomfortable indeed.

ronniecat

John Marsh: ANTHONY SCHAEFFER Sgt. Bannen: DAVID WEBBER
Written by PETER WHALLEY Directed by CHARLES LAUDER

Wednesday (3558, Wednesday 23 June 1993)

At the Baldwins' flat, Mike tells Alma that he's thinking about taking Mark to the movies that night. Alma asks if he's getting his car back that day, and when Mike gleefully admits that he should have it sometime that morning, Alma suggests that Mike's plans for Mark are really his way of celebrating, and she wouldn't mind being included. Mike offers to pick up a few juicy steaks and cook them for their dinner, giving Alma the opportunity to observe that Mike should have his car nicked more often.

Things are a bit tense at Emily's house. Percy is worried about his little ruse of reimbursing Emily's £40 for the car-clamping while giving her to believe that it was actually the garage that refunded the money. He's obviously given Emily the silent treatment through breakfast, and she suggests, while clearing the table, that he stop sulking over her upcoming newspaper interview. After all, she was the one who got clamped. "But you were reimbursed," Percy reasons, to which Emily responds that it was simply "hush money." She's still going to give an interview to the newspapers. A puzzled Emily informs Percy that she just can't understand his sudden change in attitude. He was incredibly angry when he discovered that the garage was making a small fortune clamping cars and "extorting" money, and now, all of a sudden, he's "gone all pacifist." Percy realizes he can't rationalize his way out of this one, so assumes a long face and tells Emily that there's "only one thing" she can do for him -- and she knows what that is.

Curly is unlocking his car and getting ready to drive to work when Reg rushes across, looking a bit frazzled. He didn't sleep a wink last night, and the few times he nodded off, he had nightmares about Lord Morgan handing him his walking papers. Curly tries to reason that Reg doesn't know why Head Office wants to see him, but Reg is convinced that he'll be getting the sack. "It's humiliating," he admits to Curly, so begs him to keep his predicament from other staff members. He also hopes that Curly will forgive him for all the times he stood in his way and obstructed the path to possible promotion.

Mike arrives at the garage and wonders if Kevin has any messages for him. He's on top of the world because he'll be getting his car back, but Kevin is more concerned about having to work on his own, so asks if Mike could return some faulty car parts to Bolton while he's out. Mike makes a big issue of doing menial tasks, so Kevin reminds him again that he's on his own, and would have to lock-up the garage if he goes himself. Mike still feels very put upon for having his car nicked, and Kevin sarcastically tells him he'll be sure to buy him a sympathy card the next time he's at a shop. Mike relents and agrees to return the parts.

At the Kabin, Emily tells Mavis and Rita how puzzled she is by Percy's attitude toward the newspaper interview. She admits that she did get a refund and an apology from the garage, but Mavis thinks she still ought to expose them for the extortionists they are. Emily hasn't made her mind up yet, though, and is still of "two minds" about what to do. As she leaves, Jim comes in and joshes that he's buying a newspaper so he can peruse the "help wanted" columns. Rita tells him she just might be able to help him out, as she knows of a vacant position that's right up Jim's alley.

Reg is a bag of nerves when he approaches Maureen at Bettabuys, telling her that like the condemned man, he's there for "one last look." Maureen tries to comfort him by reminding him that no matter what happens, he'll always have her. He tells her he can't believe the shenanigans Head Office is pulling -- mail that would normally be directed to him is suddenly going to Mr. Watts. "The king is dead, long live the king," he sighs, "the handwriting is on the wall." As Reg heads off to his car, Curly catches up with him and begins talking in riddles. He has something for him, but doesn't think he'll need it, but just in case he does, he's going to give it to him, but only because he thinks he won't need it, etc. He finally pulls an envelope from his suit jacket and tells Reg that it's a testimonial -- something he's written to let Reg know what he thinks of him.

Back on the street, Alf reminds Deirdre that he has a council meeting to attend, but assures her that Audrey will be in soon to help out. Deirdre expresses again her fear that she'll be out of work as soon as Brendan Scott takes ownership of the shop, and Alf replies that he's "had a word" and as far as he's concerned, Brendan is a reliable man and will keep Deirdre on. After Alf leaves, Deirdre teases Steve MacDonald about his purchases, which consist of several frozen dinners. Steve admits they're for him and his mom, and when Deirdre asks what Jim will eat, Steve scoffs that he can look after himself. She also asks if there's any news on Doug, but apparently there are no new developments there.

Mike, meanwhile, has arrived at the dealership and after admiring his jag for a few moments, asks the dealer for his keys. It appears there's a bit of a problem, though. The investigating police officer is there again, and he explains that "the gaffer" isn't best pleased with this particular crime. It seems a bit fishy that a fellow nicks a car and sells it on his own doorstep -- it all seems just a bit too smooth -- so Mike's car will remain in impound until the investigation is completed. Mike is extremely unhappy with this turn of events, but the police officer tells him sympathetically that his hands are tied.

Percy earwigs outside Emily's livingroom door, and can hear her inform the reporter, Mr. Hinchcliffe, that she's decided to cancel the interview "for personal reasons." As Percy enters the room, Mr. Hinchcliffe presses his case, reminding Emily that she has a "public duty" to tell the story. It takes "bottle" to do what Emily did, and he's eager to disclose the details of her valiant struggle against a larger corporation. Percy, meanwhile, continues to interject remarks that it's Emily's decision, which ought to be respected. When Hinchcliffe asserts that he's going to print the story anyway, without Emily's input, she relents and agrees to give him the details. Percy looks gobsmacked, as the noose slowly tightens.

Mike arrives back at the garage, and seeing a mechanic bent over a vehicle, assumes that it's Kevin. As he begins the sad story of not getting his beloved jag back, Jim MacDonald straightens up and turns to face him. An angry Mike demands to know what he's doing there and where Kevin is, and is told that he's only minding the shop so that Kevin can take his lunch break. Mike reminds Jim that he's the one who does the hiring and firing of staff around there, and Jim sarcastically shoots back that he's also the one who hired the mechanic who stole his car. As Mike's blood pressure rises, Jim throws down his oily rag and walks out, yelling that Mike will find all his spanners and equipment are still there. When Mike tries to call him back, Jim unceremoniously tells him to "shove it!"

At the Rovers Return, Jack does his best to convince Steve that he shouldn't take sides over his parents' disagreement, and that sons and dads ought to be mates. Steve doesn't seem impressed with the advice, and while he finds a table to sup his pint, Jack admits to Betty that Jim MacDonald has to be some sort of idiot, throwing away an opportunity to run his own pub. Mike arrives a few seconds later and hands Kevin the keys to the garage, informing him that he locked it up. Kevin is surprised, since he'd left Jim in charge. When Mike expresses his unhappiness at the lip Jim gave him, Kevin asserts that Jim is a good person.

Ken stops for a few groceries at the Corner Shop and takes the opportunity to ask Deirdre how Tracy got along with her final exams. Deirdre doesn't know as yet, but clearly wants to try to prepare Ken for the news that Tracy plans to quit school. Her efforts are impeded when Alf arrives back, wanting to know if there are any messages. While Ken continues to yammer on about Tracy's courses, Deirdre tells Alf that Brendan Scott wanted to speak to him. Ken finally leaves, after Deirdre assures him that she'll try to give him a report on Tracy later. Alf, meanwhile, wonders what Brendan wanted, characterizing him as being a "bit dodgy," and one who plays his cards close to the chest. Deirdre is alarmed by Alf's newest assessment of Brendan, reminding him that earlier he insisted that Brendan was "reliable." Since Alf doesn't seem to know one way or another, Deirdre wants to know whether or not she should start looking for a new job.

In the Kabin, Rita asks Curly if he wants to continue having his "lodger wanted" card in the window. Things have changed, he informs her; he's in line for a promotion and a pay rise, so he won't need to share his accommodations with anyone. He's about to give her more details when Maureen rushes in for a box of matches -- Reg's pilot light has gone out, and she's anxious to cook him a nice dinner after his awful day. Curly asks for news, but Maureen hasn't heard anything yet since Reg is still not home.

Kevin drops by Jim's place to apologize for dropping him in it with Baldwin. Jim shrugs it off; he and Mike have never seen eye-to-eye, although he agrees that he was rather nasty and may have "shot himself in the foot" as far as future job prospects at the garage are concerned. Kevin tries to give him a few pounds for his efforts, but Jim refuses the money.

Back at the pub, Emily, Rita and Mavis sit together and discuss things. Rita tries to defend herself for pointing Jim at Mike's garage, and Emily reminds her that Mike has never been very fond of Jim MacDonald. Mavis sniffs that some men can't be helped -- Jim can't even work with his own wife without having problems. Rita asks Emily if she did the interview, and Emily rolls her eyes, making it clear she doesn't want to discuss it because it's already caused "enough trouble." "Don't be so touchy," Mavis twitters, suggesting that Emily is reticent because "Mr. Sugden talked you out of it." Emily abruptly ends the discussion by getting up to leave, but her parting shot is to Mavis when she informs her that "the full story will be in tomorrow's Gazette -- and you'll be the first to know, won't you?"

As Emily exits, she passes Maureen and Reg, who is grinning like a Cheshire cat. While he offers a round of drinks to all his friends, Curly is obviously shocked by his demeanour. When Reg sees Curly's expression, he gleefully asserts that Curly should have been there. "Lord Morgan put his hand on my shoulder" Reg cackles, and informed him that he wanted Reg to take over for Brendan Scott! Reg's chest continues to expand as he confides to Curly that Morgan "wanted a manager he could trust."

Things aren't as bright at the Cafe, where Mike appears to be in a depression-induced coma over his impounded car. While he stares off into space, Gail makes it clear to Alma that she has little sympathy, and can't understand why anyone would get so upset over a car. Alma comically asks if she had a favourite teddy bear as a child, one that she couldn't go to sleep without. Gail and Alma giggle at the obvious parallel. After Gail leaves for the day, Alma does her best to assure Mike that he'll probably have his car back very soon. In the meantime, she reminds him of their dinner plans, which have obviously gone out of Mike's mind, because he asks if she could make him a sausage buttie.

Back at the Rovers Return, Reg is being congratulated by everyone present. Deirdre takes the opportunity to break the news to Ken that Tracy has decided not to return to school after this term. When she sees Ken's shocked expression, she advises him to give Tracy some space for now. If he plays his cards right, she just might change her mind.

At the bar, Maureen thanks Curly for the testimonial -- it wasn't needed at Head Office, but it did Reg a world of good. Reg interrupts their tete-a-tete and suggests Maureen buy Alf a drink while he takes Curly aside. Sliding in beside him at one of the booths, Reg asks Curly what he thinks of the latest development, and Curly admits he's pleased for him. He even tells Reg that he'll put in a good word for Maureen; perhaps she could be made his assistant. Reg realizes that Curly has made the assumption that he'll step into the manager's position now, and glibly informs him that a decision hasn't been made as yet. Clearly disappointed by this news, Curly hopes that Reg at least put in a good word for him, but Reg snorts and reminds him that "this is Head Office we're talking about -- every man for himself." "Oh, that is terrific," Curly says in disgust, but too caught up in his own glory, Reg babbles on that Curly will be acting manager in the meanwhile. "Thanks a bunch," says Curley despondently. Reg goes on to inform him that Miss Fennick will be stepping in as Curly's "number two." "MISS FENNICK?" shreiks Curly in disbelief. "Yes," replies Reg, and then describes her glowingly as a "high flyer, well thought of at Head Office -- so watch your back." As Curly's spirits visibly sink with each new revelation, Reg continues on that he really *shouldn't* be divulging this sort of information. "I hope you appreciate that. Anyway, what are friends for?" He throws his arm around Curly's shoulder and gives him a sideways hug, seemingly unaware of Curly's utter despair.

Heather Morlan

John Marsh (car dealer): ANTHONY SCHAEFFER Sgt. Bannen: DAVID WEBBER Nick Hinchcliffe: CHRISTOPHER PENNEY
Written by TOM ELLIOTT Directed by CHARLES LAUDER

Thursday (3559, Friday 25 June 1993)

We start off outside the corner shop where Tracy, on her first official day of leisure, has had a lie in and is now letting her mother know that her plans for the day mean she wont' be home for dinner. Passing by, Ken's remark about Tracy needing to stop at the job center elicits a glance from Tracy that acknowledges that Tracy realizes her father now knows she doesn't want to finish school. (For non UK'rs, I believe there is or was what is called "O" levels where you graduate school with basic qualifications. You can go an extra year for "A" levels that I believe are for those that hope to go to university or college. Ontario has or had a "Grade 13" which is a similar scheme)

We follow traffic down the street and back up again, a white van leading us to the Kabin. It's a newspaper delivery (I thought they were delivered at the crack of dawn?) Percy, who has been pacing outside the store, snaps at the delivery man "About time and all!" and follows him inside as the postman comes out and continues to his next stop, the garage, handing Kevin a stack of mail. Kevin sifts through the envelopes and finds a postcard.

Inside the Kabin, (nice touch, inside the shop we can still hear the music that's been drifting through the last few scenes, which was coming from Kevin's radio.) Percy fidgets while Rita unbundles the papers and extracts one for him (30p) Mavis is wittering about Derek's wishing for a promotion to Head Caretaker (Potts got a promotion if you'll recall). Rita notices the newspaper article about Emily's crusade against the wheel clamping company, noting that the manager of said company is "unavailable for comment". Percy has seen the article too and leaves in an agitated state.

Back across the road, Deirdre is telling Audrey about Ken's reaction to Tracy's decision about school. Vera, with the bonny baby on her hip, picks up gripe water and ciggies. Audrey starts to open the credit book to add to the balance and is surprised when Vera self consciously hands over a tenner in cash to pay for her purchases. Audrey further embarrasses Vera by holding the bill up to the light as if to check it is real. Vera's face rather reflects what I'm thinking ("Bitch!") but with amazing dignity thanks Audrey and leaves. Brendan Scott arrives and Deirdre gives him a rather challenging look.

In the Kabin, Betty, Rita and Mavis have their heads together looking at Emily's picture in the paper, clucking over the article. They admire Emily's apparently successful determination just as Herself comes in. Emily is tickled that the interview was printed after all but is surprised to hear that Percy was in hours ago and bought a copy.

Kevin and Steve are standing around drinking tea and gassing about Mike who will go off his nut "when he sees this". Mike arrives so Steve high tails it out the back way to his unit and Kevin gets rid of the second mug. The first mug .. . er. . . Mike that is, walks in and after a bit of business talk, he checks the post. Steve, not wanting to miss this, shuffles in the back way again, on the premise of asking Kevin for something that I didn't catch, pretending it's the first time he's been in. Mike finds the postcard, which depicts a red Mercedes sports car and has a slogan on it in German. The note on the back reveals a sly message from Doug Murray. Kevin and Steve pretend this is the first they've seen of it and express astonishment at the nerve of the bloke! Mike angrily tears the card in four and tosses it in the bin and stalks out leaving Steve and Kevin to emit the phoniest sounding laughs I've ever heard!

Finally we shift away from the end of the Street to Bettabuys where Curly is awaiting the arrival of Miss Fenwick with trepidation, fearing she could be a corporate spy. Turns out she's a real whiz kid, thought highly of at Head Office and though is temporarily acting Assistant Manager just as Curly is acting Manager, they are both up for the manager's job, vacated by Reg. Reg suggests Curly either destroy her confidence before the interview or suck up big time because she'll probably blow him away in the interview! Curly is not impressed at Reg's attitude and non-support.

Mavis visits Emily at home, it looks like they are going somewhere together. Emily scoots upstairs to get her shoes and Mavis picks up the ringing phone for her, swiftly handing over the receiver with hardly enough time to have said hello only she knows who it is and where they work! It's the manager of the wheel clamping company. Emily takes up the phone and from her side of the conversation, we see her attitude change from defiant to puzzlement as she tries to work out that the man is telling her that he has not given her money back and no, she hasn't had anything in writing.

Back at the garage, the police Sergeant has arrived to see Mike. Seems there's still more paperwork before Mike can get his car back. The Sgt. Mentions the drunk driving accident last year when Mike's Jag got bashed up, you remember, when "Kevin Webster" was driving. He asks to see "Kevin" to ask questions about Doug and looks slightly curious when Mike hesitates and then summons Kevin who comes out from the shadows in a sweat. Kevin answers the questions about Doug carefully with a few eye contacts to Mike. The copper seems satisfied but asks Kevin if his hair was always that colour. Kevin smoothly says it goes lighter in the summer which seems to jive with how the policeman remembers the driver of the Jag at the accident site. Just before he leaves, he finds the postcard, now back out of the bin and taped together (Steve's work, seems to be the implication) and is curious that they never informed the police as this is a clue. He takes it with him. Unfortunately, Mike and Kevin do the "Wow, that was close but I think we fooled him" within earshot of the cop before he gets into his car. Well it seems that way anyway as the cop looks closely at the postcard message and raises and eyebrow.

In the Rovers at dinnertime, Reg and Maureen share a booth. He asks her to pick two numbers, one between 1 and 12 and the other between 1 and 30. 9 and 24 are the numbers she chooses and he asks her to marry him on September 24. She's touched and is reduced to tears when Betty brings over prearranged champagne and flowers. Now all they have to do is tell Maud!

Percy's been rumbled and Emily is ripping a strip off him with Mavis as witness. He lied to her and made her look a fool. Mavis tries to break in with a bit of sympathy for Percy's good intentions but Emily is too angry to hear it. She's not even consoled by Percy's concern that it was becoming too much for her and her mental health, that only makes her lose her temper altogether and she slams the 60 quid down on the table to repay him and tells him he'll need it because rented accommodations aren't cheap!

Jack and Vera are shopping at the much cheaper Bettabuys, stocking up so they can avoid the corner shop. (Pride has it's price) One aisle over Reg is telling Curly about the wedding date when Elaine Fenwick arrives and introduces herself. It sounds like battle stations when she makes a point of reminding Curly that she's gunning for the same job as he.

Brendan Scott is still in the corner shop, waiting for Alf and observing the custom coming and going. Deirdre gets on with serving customers while Audrey praises Deirdre's sterling qualities as a shop assistant to Scott. Brendan wryly voices what they've been dancing around, this is about Deirdre's continuing employment right? Well, Deirdre says, it would be good to know so she can start looking for something else if he isn't going to keep her on. He states that he doesn't see it as a problem, her work is perfectly adequate (talk about a left handed compliment!) Alf finally arrives, having been held up with Council business. Brendan gets right to the point, he believes the solicitors are holding things up on Alf's say so. Alf seems genuinely puzzled, these things do take time to sort out. Brendan points out that the price he's paying was conditional on the swift conclusion of the transaction. Otherwise, he too could be looking elsewhere. Could Alf move his solicitor along please?

Down at the end of the street, parked around the corner from the Rovers, our copper friend and a female detective Inspector are sitting in an unmarked car, watching Kevin and Steve come up the street. The D.I. radios for an identification on the lad they convicted for stolen radios a year or so ago and their conversation reveals that they now have sussed the identity switch over Steve's accident with the Jag and are now concluding that it was an attempt to bilk the insurance company then. Steve and Kevin come down to and into the Rovers, arguing loudly about that identity switch with Steve promising he hasn't told anyone else and Kevin ordering him to keep his gob shut. I don't know if the police overheard that as sometimes in this show, people that couldn't have missed overhearing don't always, and when you think they couldn't possibly, they do! Anyway, they deduce that this recent car nicking might also be a similar attempt to defraud seeing as all the persons involved worked for Mike Baldwin.

Through the car window we see Jack and Vera returning from their shopping, Jack struggling with the bags and Vera wheeling Tommy. Audrey comes out of the shop down the road and notices them too.

In the café, Alma and Ken have an amicable chat. Alma is dismayed to hear that Maggie has finished with Ken. He admits it might have worked out but it was a loaded situation for him. Tracy arrives and tells her father that he needn't worry, she has a job already! Maggie has taken her on at the florist shop full time! (Ow, that stings!)

Mavis has spread the news about Percy's shenanigans and Betty, Rita and Deirdre join her in the pub for a good gossip about it. Betty and Mavis sympathize with Percy's good intentions but Rita is firmly on Emily's side. Reg, Maureen and Maud arrive. Maud is settled at a table. They tell her that the wedding date is Sept. 24 but, she, fighting it at every step, predicts a hospital appointment on that day. Reg points out that no matter, the wedding will go on without her. Seeing she can't win, she backs off and asks how much she's allowed to spend on a new outfit for the wedding.

Alf and Audrey come in to the pub. Audrey teases Jack about shopping at the rival Bettabuys. Later, all the women toast Audrey's retirement while the men play darts.

Good Lord! I thought Mike was wearing a shoulder holster and pistol under his arm. Well he is wearing a holster but it's for his mobile phone. How Freudian is that!! Anyway the doorbell rings. He thinks it's Alma because he's got her keys in hand but it's the Inspector and Sargent. They've told him that they're investigating possible fraud. He replies that he only pays "their" wages, he doesn't run their lives, i.e. absolving himself of all knowledge and guilt. The bell rings again and this time it is Alma who is mighty curious about what she's walked in on. Mike realizes that the police think that the Doug Murray thing might have been a set up as the previous business about the identity switch clearly was, to defraud the insurance company twice. Mike gets stroppy and refuses to say more until they get more evidence and he has a solicitor. Fine, and he's informed that they *will* be investigating further. Alma asks to be informed about all the details and Mike swears that he's not involved (well, not this time). In the pub Kevin and Steve are playing darts, thinking that all will be ok so long as they keep their mouths shut.

Diane Johnston

Sgt. Bannen DAVID WEBBER Detective Inspector Chambers RACHAEL LAURENCE Elaine Fenwick PIPPA HINCHLEY First Appearance
Written by PAUL ABBOTT Directed by CHARLES LAUDER

Friday (3560, Monday 28 June 1993)


Originally transmitted: 30 June; 2, 5, 7 & 9 July 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 5 - Friday 9 June 2000
Episode Numbers: 3561 - 3565

Monday (3561, Wednesday 30 June 1993)

Welcome to another week of WTN Classic Corrie. Today we peruse the diaries of some of the residents.

Vera writes... Rtommeh's poorly again, I just had him round two weeks ago but I had to take him round again to the surgery this morning. I asked Rjack to pick up sommat for his tea but he always finds an excuse to skive and I can't show my face in Alf's now we've go so much on tick. Well what are we supposed to do? Anyway Tommy has the mumps, doctor said, even though he's a bit young for it. That's what you get for waiting around in the doctor's office, you pick up all sorts. Well I didn't know mumps could be devastating to a grown man, did I? Never heard of such nonsense until that nosy Mrs. Pearce stuck her oar in and from the way she was talking, grown men can be rendered useless to a woman so that's it, Rjack will have to kip somewhere else until Tommy's better. He doesn't like it much but I won't hand him any excuses on a plate, he's got enough of them now, "Oh Vera, it's not my fault" Yeah that's what he'd be saying. Any road, Ivy said she'd take him for a few nights only it turns out Don chucked Jack back out. Come to find out that he and Ivy aren't living as man and wife, he's kipping in t'other bedroom!! And she never said a word to me! Well it's too bad, innit but Jack is going to lodge at Curly's for a few nights when all was said and done.

Maureen's wedding journal... Dear Diary, I can hardly wait to marry my Reggie although I did rather fancy a spring wedding. Still we'll be married that's the most important thing and sooner than later if September is still a go. Oh there's still so much to sort out with the wedding and all. We haven't even decided on a honeymoon. I was telling Ivy at work over the bog rolls that I thought Paris would be sooo romantic but Reggie has Rome in mind. Ivy thought Rome would be lovely, what with the Vatican and the Pope and everything but I suppose that's her sort of thing, being religious and all. There's even this one ceiling with famous paintings on it, Ivy knew about it, the Sistine Chapel it's called. Reggie reckons I would be seeing plenty of ceilings in our married life and I should start with the best!! I didn't know they rented out rooms there! There's one fly in the ointment though, Reg is resisting moving in to my house with me and Mother. It really is more practical and I just know Mother will learn to love Reggie once she gets to know him better. He's really changed so much, so mature and powerful! Well I'm determined to get my way on this even if I do have to give up Paris.

Deirdre's notebook... Just a few lines while I have five minutes before the tea is done. Friday is the day Mr. Scott takes over the shop. He says I'll still have me job but I'm still a bit leery. He's an odd one, is Mr. Scott, sort of oily if you get my drift. I think it's finally sinking in with Alf that he's leaving the shop and I think it isn't half bothering him. Wistful, he was today over a loaf, wittering on about supplying Daily Bread to folks. That shop really has been his life since he married Renee all those years ago. Audrey will be too glad to see the back of it, I can tell you. She were on about it again this morning, only she got on her moral high horse about being glad to see the back of folk like Steve MacDonald just as his dad came in and heard the whole thing. She wouldn't let me get a word in edgewise as she went on and on about the lad's criminal past and not knowing right from wrong, probably not taught at home. She were dead embarrassed though when Jim finally spoke up and told her what for. I know he and Liz teach the boys right from wrong and really that Steve is just too high spirited and impulsive for his own good. But Audrey*. Well some folks just won't be told. Then this arvo Steve were in for a sarnie and he certainly didn't have owt nice to say about his dad. Terrible thing this falling out between Liz and Jim with the lads caught in the middle. The boys don't realize how complicated a marital row can really be and though I haven't had any details from Liz, I'll be willing to bet there's a lot more to it than we know. Steve was surprised to hear that his dad were defending him to Audrey but he was too proud to back down*. Kids!

Curly's DayTimer... What am I going to do about Elaine Fenwick! She's after my job that I know. Just this morning she was scolding Maureen and Ivy for nattering. Why I should have warned her that Maureen is marrying the area manager when I should have kept me mouth shut I don't know. Too nice for me own good! All I got was a load of bother and a quote from company policy for my trouble. Then Angie had a go at me at dinnertime in the pub, telling me I ought to "kill her with kindness" as it were. Be nice to her, she said, she's probably lonely, she said. Well maybe she's got a point, so I tried, I really did. But Miss Fenwick only spouted more rules and regs about fraternizing with the staff and firmly rejected my strictly platonic invitation for a quiet drink after hours. Fine then, No more Mr. Nice Guy! And on top of it all I'm lumbered with Jack Duckworth. Vera's evicted him because she thinks he'll be impotent if he catches mumps from the baby. The worst that can happen is that he would become sterile and I don't suppose that matters much at his age. Jack as per usual, is going to take full advantage. He won't tell Vera that there won't be any physical repercussions so that he can have a few nights' peace and I suppose I do feel a modicum of sympathy for him, trying to raise a toddler at his age so I agreed to say nothing.

Kevin's diary... What was I supposed to do, eh? I had to come into work today in the end, I've got a wife and baby to feed and a mortgage to pay. What else could I do but knuckle under to Baldwin but I'll be damned if I go crawling to him to apologize for what I said. He came in this morning, the toerag and insisted that it wasn't him what grassed me to the police. Said there wasn't anything in it for him so why should he. Well maybe he's got a point, he always looks out for himself, does Baldwin so I accepted that. But I'm still not apologizing to him and I told him so and he backed down for once. Still he made great pains in pointing out that it were Steve that got me into all this trouble. Well maybe yeah, but he's just a kid and Baldwin wasn't all sweet and innocent in it all either. Later in the pub he started mouthing off about Steve costing him money cause the insurance demanded repayment for the accident repairs. Good enough for him, I say but if Steve goes down, so do I and I think it bothered him more that he'd have to get another mechanic than it did me getting in trouble. Why I put up with it I don't know. One of these days I'm going to tell him what I think of him. I will. Really. Then that prat Steve comes to my house when we're trying to have our tea and starts shooting his mouth off about this side business he's running printing tshirts using Mike's machinery. Sally put the boots to that quick enough, what we don't know won't hurt us. Don't need to give Baldwin anymore ammunition do we? At least he felt sorry and said so and offered to pay any fine I get but that won't be enough and if all we get is a fine, we'll be getting of easy, I say.

Jack's writes... I don't believe this! Vera's gone and locked me out o't'ouse! Just because Rtommeh has the mumps. It's not even a serious case! She says it can render me bits dysfunctional so maybe she's got a point. As I were telling Raquel, Vera does worry about our love life. Ok so I were putting it on a bit much when I said that Vera couldn't keep up with me but I can't have a lovely young woman thinking I'm not up to it, can I? That were quite a surprise to find out that Don and Ivy are all but split and all but it didn't help me find a place to kip. Still it must be true because Mavis were in and said same as Vera, about how it can take a man with serious affects. Too bad I had to see to something on the floor just as Alf came in, I couldn't risk him mithering me about that bill we owe him. Mavis kept on conversing with thin air though, silly cow. Alf asked her if she was ok and the poor lass wittered on about so much we still don't know* You can say that again, Mave and I'd have had a right laugh if I weren't trying to avoid Alf!

Joe Broughton makes notes... Sally confided in me again today. I knew there was something on her mind and I didn't want to pry but I assured her if I could help I certainly would. In a heartbeat, though I didn't say it. She's so worried about that clod of a husband of hers who really doesn't appreciate her at all and I did tell her that. He's let her down and now they are facing a fine and who knows what else, all because she wanted him to help out a young lad. Ok so maybe it wasn't the right thing to do but it seemed like it at the time so it really wasn't her fault no matter what she thinks. She's a good wife and a good mother is Sally. Johnathan really likes her. So do I if the truth be told and I think she likes me too, or else she wouldn't trust me with her confidences, would she?

Diane Johnston

Written by JOHN STEVENSON Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Tuesday (3562, Friday 2 July 1993)

Outside Alf's Mini Mart: Alf arrives, he looks up at the shop sign and gives a little sigh before unlocking the door and entering. Alf does not turn on the lights but stands behind the counter in the surveying the domain where soon he will no longer be master. Deirdre enters and congratulates him on his punctuality even on his last day. Deirdre reminds Alf that tomorrow he'll be able to have a lie in, and that he and Audrey will probably need one after their retirement party tonight. Alf says he doesn't want any fuss, just a few drinks with goods friends in the Rovers, then he puts on his overall for the last time.

Over at Curly's, mumps refugee Jack is foraging for breakfast. He tells Curly that he's not a very good advert for a Supermarket Manager since the cupboard is distinctly bare. Curly reminds Jack he is only an Assistant Manager and probably will be one forever. "I'm up against a woman," he tells Jack who thinks he is going to hear some thing interesting until Curly tells him he is referring to his job. Jack, while professing he is not chauvinist, has a little anti- feminist rant about "how the women have got it made nowadays, give them a bit of equality and they run away with it. Us men have no chance etc.etc. " This speech is accompanied by Jack peeling a banana (the results of his foraging) and symbolically mashing it into a piece of toast.

We men must stick together Jack tells Curly. And how long will us men be sticking together? Jack says Vera will let him know when his manhood is out of danger, the doctor reckons ten days. Ten days?!!! Curly is not happy at the prospect. Then followed another mumps joke.

On the street Vera is cooing over Tommy, Gail approaches with a big gooey, aww-bless-his-little- cotton-socks type of smile. Gail reminds Vera that you have to be careful with mumps. Vera tells Gail that Jack is staying with Curly. He was going to go to Don and Ivy 's but she thinks they are going through a bad patch. Gail laughs says Don and Ivy's marriage is one long bad patch. Vera replies that according to Jack things aren't right between Don and Ivy. Gail is puzzled at this.

Then follows an exchange with Alf across the street in which we find out Gail and Martin will be attending the retirement party in shifts and Vera will not as she can't leave Tommy.

In the shop, Ken asks Alf what his new landlord is like. "Maybe I'll give him a list of all the outstanding repairs for the flat," says Ken. Alf protests that he has kept the flat in very good repair, anyway Brendan will have his hands full running the shop. Alf opines as Scott won't have the support of a large organization (Bettabuys) behind him it won't be as easy as he thinks.

At Bettabuys Ivy and Maureen are stacking shelves and gossiping. Curly reprimands them but Maureen tells him they are a bit concerned for Elaine Fenwick as she has just encountered "Sam the Man". Curly observes the encounter with a smile. (Apparently Sam the Man is the workplace lech. When he isn't pushing his trolleys he's pushing his luck.) Elaine approaches and asks what the meeting is about. Curly explains that they were concerned for her. Maureen explains that Sam gets a bit fresh now and then. However Elaine is experienced in squelching aspirations - especially fresh ones. She tells the group that Sam had just asked her what she looks for in a man and she told him "Hair for starters". Elaine advises Maureen and Ivy to deal with Sam in a similar manner. The ladies giggle as Elaine departs with a self-satisfied look on her face. Curly looks as if he's been squelched too.

In the Rovers Audrey is making sure Bet has enough money to cover the retirement do. Jim arrives for a pint. Audrey tries to apologize for her remarks about Steve made the previous day however Jim dismisses her attempt. This exchange was witnessed by Bet and Audrey covers her embarrassment by remarking to Bet "What do I care if he never shops in the store again?" Alf arrives, unaware of this exchange, and reminds Jim of the retirement party. Jim half mollified says he'll be there. Alf moves to the bar and starts reminiscing about when the McDonalds first appeared on the street. Audrey is in no mood for reminiscing. She wants her G&T but Alf reminds her he wants her at the shop to relieve Deirdre. She leaves reluctantly to spend her last afternoon in the shop.

Meanwhile, Brendan Scott is being initiated into the mysteries of the Holy Hotpot. Betty tells Brendan that it is a habit of Alf's, bordering on tradition, to have a hotpot and a pint every lunchtime. The punctilious Brendan tucks a red paper napkin into his collar and informs her that he will have to sample the quality before he can promise to follow such tradition. The Holy Hotpot is borne aloft by Betty and set before the new Lord of the Mini Mart. Betty, Alf and Bet stand by, holding their collective breath. His Lordship takes a mouthful and pronounces it - Good. Upon his first impression of the Hotpot, Brendan feels he can offer the Rovers his patronage. And it's first impressions that count he tells Bet. "You took the words right out of my mouth, Brandon." replies Bet.

Jack is trying to get the night off to no avail. Bet says, "no". " Let me put it another way, no." Jack cites the mumps and says he could have caught it and unknowingly be spreading it about. "If you have got mumps, the last thing you'll be doing is spreading it about", replies Bet, tartly.

(Mumps jokes have now been retired for a 50,000 mile service)

Over at the Queens, someone has an official letter. It's Steve's court hearing. Liz comes over and he tells her the court date is next Monday. Short notice but we'll just have to sort something. What's this "we"? Steve does not want his Dad there. He is frightened Jim will mouth off in front of the magistrate.

In the Mini Mart, Tracy has arrived with some flowers that a customer didn't want. She intended them for Deirdre however Alf mistakenly thinks the flowers are for him and Audrey. After exchanging looks Deirdre and Tracy go along with it. Audrey gets very sentimental when she sees the flowers and has a little weep but her mood changes quickly when Alf asks her to help him carry the bacon slicer to the car. He's going to keep it as a little momento! "There's nothing little about it", says Audrey, "I'm not having that smelly, rusty thing in the house." Alf tells her he kept it in perfect condition in line with health and safety standards. He goes off with the bacon slicer and Audrey takes the flowers. Deirdre and Tracy collapse in laughter.

At the Kabin, Brendan Scott is busy doing an inventory of their stock, unaware it is past closing time. Mavis keeps asking him want he wants and he finally introduces himself. Rita sweetly suggests he could give them a copy and save them some work. This remark washes over the unctuous Mr Scott like water off a duck's back. Rita tries again and suggests he return tomorrow. "Ah early closing " Brendan marks his clipboard. "We do open at 5 a.m" replies Rita in a steelier tone. "Ah up with the birds?" "We wake them actually" says Mavis. Lord Mini Mart retreats, after calling Rita Mavis and vice versa. The ladies are not impressed.

Nearly closing time at Bettabuys and Elaine informs Curly that their interviews for the job of Manager have been brought forward to next Wednesday. They wish each other good luck. "Break a leg" says Curly under his breath as Elaine descends the staircase.

Ivy, stacking produce, is accosted by Sam the Man. Baldy offers her a mint. Following Elaine's advice, she tells him she doesn't accept sweets from strangers. However this tactic backfires as Sam suggests, with a leer, that if he is a stranger he will have to do something about it.

Don arrives at Curly's with a four pack of ale and an apology for Jack about his reception at Don and Ivy's the other day. He explains to Jack that he only moved back with Ivy because it was convenient and he could have his own room. Jack tells him he understands. "If truth be told, Don " he confides, 'you and I have marriages like most in the country". (I don't know whether to be comforted or appalled by this)

Curly arrives and is offered a brew. "Shouldn't you be at work, Jack?" "Oh you sound just like our Vera", says Jack as he turns up the TV to watch the race he has a bet on.

Jim decides to call Liz and find out what's happening about the court date. Liz is evasive but tells Jim the date is Monday. She tells Jim Steve is at the Rovers and he should go and sort things between them. Jim realizes that Steve doesn't want him at the court hearing.

In the Rovers, the retirement party is underway. The guests of honour arrive. Rita asks Alf if he is all closed up. "Yes, it's the end of an era." he replies. Ken has buttonholed Brendan about the outstanding repairs. Brendan counters he will be quite busy with the shop for the first few months but when the lease period is up for renewal he can review the state of the flat - and the rent! Not the answer Ken was looking for. Brendan makes another friend in the street, not! He then proceeds to mix up Mita and Ravis again.

Curly tries to pump Reg about the Manager's job but Reg tells him it is in the lap of the gods. Reg then proceeds to tell Brendan in Alf's presence he is glad he didn,t get the shop because after two weeks as area manager he realizes the shop would have been too small for him. Alf and Brendan are not amused by this remark. Audrey is not amused when Vivian Barford turns up at the party. She is Alf's friend from WARTS (not Harry Potter's school but the Weatherfield Association of Retail Traders). Vivian has come to present an honorary WARTS lifetime membership to Alf. Audrey's face shows how thrilled she is at the prospect of continued WARTS meetings and social functions. Aside she asks Gail if she knows of a permanent cure for warts.

Apparently Vera couldn't get to the shop before closing and is round at Ivy's borrowing some milk and a couple of eggs. She is also checking up on the state of play in the Brennan household. Don is home but Ivy is not. Don tells Vera Ivy is at a church meeting. Don smiles to himself as he shuts the door on Vera. He knows she was after more than omelettes.

Back in the Rovers Alf is thanking everyone who has helped him and asks Jack to get the "fizzy stuff." Rita steps forward to add her good wishes and thank Alf for being a good friend and neighbour to them all, not to mention all the ladies he has given away in the nicest meaning of the phrase including Rita herself when she married Len Fairclough.

Gail corners Don, who has just arrived, and asks if he and Ivy are OK. He tells everything is fine - just the same as ever. Gail is content with this answer. Betty brings in a cake and Alf is called to cut it but he has disappeared. Vivian offers to go a look for him, but Audrey snaps she will go.

Audrey finds Alf in the shop. He says he left his overall behind, but Audrey knows he is having difficulty leaving. He tells her he doesn't know what he's going to do when he gets up in the morning. Audrey tells him they are going to have a lovely time. Alf picks up his pinny and locks the door for the last time.

Libby Seekings

Tom Duckworth DARYL EDWARDS Sam Owens FREDDIE EARLE Elaine Fenwick PIPPA HINCHLEY Vivian Barford PAULA TILBROOK
Written by PATREA SMALLACOMBE Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Wednesday (3563, Monday 5 July 1993)

At the Queens, Liz and Steve discuss today's court appearance. Liz wonders how long it will take. Steve figures 3 minutes in court and 3 hours hanging around.. Steve says he will go into work in the afternoon if he's not clamped in irons. He speaks lightheartedly about the old practice of deporting and how he wouldn't mind a trip to OZ on Her Majesty's tab. Liz does not see the humour in that.

A new sign - Best Buys - has replaced Alf's over the corner shop. Brendon Scott seems very pleased with himself as Mrs. Barlow comes to work. She tells him to call her Dierdre but he prefers to be formal as "informality in the workplace invariably leads to sloppiness". He also would like to view their relationship as a team - he as captain and Mrs. Barlow as crew (not as cabin boy as Dierdre suggested!). Dierdre heads into the shop as Derek comes up and introduces himself to Mr. SCott. The "captain" informs Derek that he plans on enlivening the shop's stock. Derek seems thrilled that there will be a more continental flavour to the shop.

In the Kabin, Des inquires after Alf's goodbye do the other night. Rita thinks it is sad as now Alf has little to get up for in the morning. Mavis comments that Alf has only himself to blame for letting his mind go as flabby as his body without any outside interests. Rita remarks on Derek's "coiled spring" appearance. The "spring" walks in to say that he thinks Mr Scott will be an asset to the neighbourhood. He also tells Mavis that he may be a little late coming home as he has the meeting about Harry Potts' job.

Curly pops in on the Websters at breakfast to wish Kevin good luck in court. Sally comments on all the bad people in the world yet their little mistake results in a thunderbolt dropping on them. She regrets her part in making Kevin go along with Steve using his name. She remembers Curly's upcoming interview and gives him a good luck card. Curly is really touched with her gesture.

Liz picks up the phone at the Queens to hear Jim's voice saying he thinks he should in court today to lend moral support no matter what Steve thinks. She agrees and says they'll pick him up at home as it is on the way to court. Steve overhears and says he doesn't want Jim there. Liz tells him to stop it - Jim is coming.

Vera drops off some freshly laundered clothes for Jack at the Rover's. Betty asks after Tommy. He is on the mend but his face is still swollen. Vera tells Jack to get used to the idea of spending a few more days at Curly's. Jack tells his "little stocking top" he shall bear up. He also asks V. to get him some fatty bacon at Bettabuys as Curly only has birdseed for breakfast items. Vera says there's no need to go all that way as Alf has obviously forgotten their debt so she will go to the corner shop for it.

In the corner shop, Phyllis is picking up a few bits and comments on the changes taking place in the shop. She is a woman of the 90's and can roll with the changes. She turns to leave but Mr. Scott stops her as she hasn't paid. Dierdre says that Alf used to give her a bit of leeway when her pension had run out. Scott refuses to allow Phyllis any credit. After she leaves, he gives Dierdre a lecture on small business, cash flow and debt. He intends to not fall into any bad business traps.

Don Brennan is knocking on the McDonald's door as Sally says goodbye and good luck to Kevin. Kev and the McDonalds share the cab as they are going to the same place.

Alf pulls up outside his old shop, notices the new sign and heads inside. He asks after any post as some personal stuff used to go to the shop. Deirdre asks about his first day of freedom and he tells her of Audrey's plans for the day. He seems to be trying to convince himself that he is enjoying retirement. Alf leaves for his day of exploring with Audrey. Scott refers to him as a dodo - an antiquated shopkeeper.

In the produce department of Bettabuys, Maureen waxes on about garlic, love lives and Reg to a co-worker. Reg walks up, exchanges a few words and smouldering looks with Maureen, then goes off, nearly impaling himself on a trolley as he goes! Maureen says she sometimes wonders what she has done to deserve such good luck in having Reg. Reg meets up with Curly and asks how things are. Curly asks if Reg has any tips for the interview. Reg tells him he, himself, will be on the interview board and that really brightens Curly's brow.

Phyllis is relaying her treatment at the corner shop to Betty and Racquel in the Rover's. They are appalled. Don comes in for a hot pot. Racquel asks how the court went and hopes Steve doesn't get another conviction. Phyllis is more bothered about Kevin as he has a family to support. Jack comes up to Don and wonders if he's up to a game of cards that night. Jack invites him to Curly's as Vera's is out and Don doesn't fancy it at his place with Ivy moaning about the evils of gambling.

Back from court, the McDonalds are at Jim's having a cuppa. Steve is anxious to leave there but Liz makes him stay for at least one cup. Apparently, Steve will have to wait up to one year for the resolution of the charges as they have to go to court. Jim says it makes little sense to drag it out as it wasn't the crime of the century but Liz points out that it's the usual procedure. Tempers flare a bit but nothing comes of it as Liz defuses the situation.

Derek is at his meeting with the headmistress. She says that Derek is in charge but as caretaker. The title Head Caretaker and expected salary raise no longer exist due to cuts across the board. He will get an auxiliary caretaker who he has to train.

Racquel goes into the Kabin and discusses brendon Scott with them. She thinks he is the type to show up at the door with champagne and "interior" motives. Derek walks in looking more like a rain cloud than a ray of sunshine and informs Mavis on the meeting. Rita tells him to be happy that he still has a job. Mavis is not pleased with the news of Derek's new female assistant.

At Curly's, Don and Jack are enjoying a few and playing cards. Curly walks in and isn't thrilled with the scene. Jack offers him a few greasy chicken nuggets and suggests Curly put the kettle on. Curly says no thanks and heads off for the Rover's where he meets up with Des, Kevin and Steve. He finds out that Kev and Steve have been committed to trial at crown court and have to wait up to a year for it. Curly sees Reg, gives him the thumbs up and tells the boys he isn't as worried about the interview as he was. Reg, after talking with Betty, seems content that Brendon is not endearing himself to the locals.

Brendon is pleased with the first day and says so to Dierdre. She is still ticked with his behaviour towards Phyllis. He shoots her down saying she is to serve the customers and he deals with the brain work. Vera pops in for a few cans for her and Ivy and a bit of fatty for Jack. Mr. Scott introduces himself and Vera is flattered thinking he remembers her from Bettabuys. He tells her she saved him a trip as he was going to call on her. She is chuffed until he tells her that Alf's debts were sold onto him and she now owes Mr Scott £220. She freaks and says she doesn't have that kind of money. He says he didn't expect her to pay it immediately. As it is now Monday, she can pay up by the end of the week or he will put the matter into his solicitor's hands. Vera, speechless, looks very shocked and then, the credits roll.

Judith Cooper

Mrs Jeffers - ROMY BASKERVILLE
Written by ADELE ROSE Directed by JULIAN FARINO

Thursday (3564, Wednesday 7 July 1993)

We open with a shot of Jack rummaging down the front of his track suit bottoms.

'What are you doing?' asks Curly.

Jack picks up a piece of toast (without washing his hands - ugh) and offers it to Curly (who turns it down). He says he felt some 'twinges down there' and thinks it is stress related due finding out he still owes £220 to the corner shop. He then has a whinge to Curly saying how unfair it is to sell a man's debts.

Curly tells him it's common practice but that Brandon Scott most likely would not have paid the full amount for the debt. In fact he probably paid less than half the amount owed. Curly leaves Jack pondering this and goes to work.

In the Mini-mart Ken and Deirdre have a moan about Brandon (hereby known as BS). Apparently, he's put everything up; the prices, Ken's rent, Deirdre's hours (but not her wages).

BS (and may I just say how much he reminds me of Mr. Burns on The Simpsons) is lurking behind them and notices a yogurt in Ken's hand. BS and Ken discuss the yogurt purchase using a gas station analogy. Ken ends it by handing the yogurt back to Deirdre saying he'll 'fill up' elsewhere. 'My, my' tuts BS 'everybody's looking for a bargain nowadays.' 'I don't think so Mr. Scott' retorts Deirdre 'just a fair deal'.

Cut to Vera's backyard and a cute little scene. She's hanging up the laundry and listening to the radio. Tommy's next to her in his stroller. She picks him up and starts to dance with him, singing along with the radio.

In front of The Kabin, Steve is listing all the things he'll be charged with to Des. Des is optimistic; maybe they'll go easy on you he says to Steve. Steve doubts it after all he already has a record. 'Sorry mate' says Des. 'Not half as sorry as I am' says Steve, glumly. (Well, I'm sure this little episode will keep Steve honest, no more criminal activity for him, right?)

Jack pokes his head over Curly's back fence and tells Vera about BS buying their debt at a bargain basement price. Vera gets quite worked up about it and is about to go have a rant at BS. However, Jack is masterminding a scheme and tells her he'll sort it soon.

Deep in the bowels of Weatherfield Comp. Caretaker Derek is tossing old papers and magazines into the incinerator. What should he spy but a pile of magazines left behind by Harry Potts. It would appear that old Harry was a bit of a porn hound. Derek is appalled at the discovery but he doesn't let that stop him having a flick through one of the mags. He flips one open to the centre page and turns it sideways. (I must say, Derek had quite a confused look on his face at this point.)

He turns back to the task at hand and starts shovelling more papers in to burn. Mrs. Copeland, Derek's new assistant, walks in. She spies the stack of Breast Enthusiast magazines. Derek is quick to point out they are Harry Potts' leftovers, not his. 'What you do in your spare time is no concern of mine Mr. Wilton' says Carol. Derek says he just didn't want her to get the wrong impression.

They both discuss what their expectations were for the job restructuring and it turns out neither are particularly happy with the new arrangements but they agree to make the best of the situation.

Jack enters The Kabin looking for ciggies and advice. He asks Rita what she knows about selling debts, she tells him to ask the Citizen's Advice Bureau, as they'd know more about it than her. Alf walks in and Jack turns on him for selling the debt to BS. Rita goes to defend Alf but he admits he did sell the debt and took a loss on it to boot. He tells Jack he was paid £75. Satisfied at last, Jack leaves.

Over at Bettabuys Curly is assembling a room for the Manager's interviews that afternoon. He's stocking it with comfy chairs, coffee, an assortment of soft drinks, paper, pens and a half-dead potted palm plant. Elaine lingers in the doorway mocking his efforts. (Mind you he IS polishing the telephone at that point). She points out that what he's doing is 'rather like building the gallows for your own execution'. Defensive Curly points out he's only doing as he was asked and will be sure to extend any credit Elaine is due for her part in the preparations. 'Oh, I'm quite capable of blowing my own trumpet Mr. Watts, I'd concentrate on my own act if I were you' says the Snotty Cow as she turns and leaves.

Meanwhile, back at the Mini-mart, BS is polishing an apple with his (hopefully unused) hanky. In walks Jack who says he's there to arrange to pay his debt. 'Ahhhexcellent' says Mr. Burns. Jack makes his offer £3 now and £2 per week for the next 36 weeks for a total repayment of £75. BS is indignant! He's not agreeing to payment by installments and £75 is nowhere near the total of the debt! Jack says he's being reasonable and has merely offered to repay what BS paid for the debt. BS again refuses to accept the offer and reiterates that the debt is £220 and if its not paid by the end of the week he's taking Jack & Vera to court. 'Take me to court, see where it gets you, you've not got a leg to stand on pal' is Jack's parting shot. Deirdre, who has been watching the whole exchange, shoots BS a smug, satisfied grin.

Reg arrives at Bettabuys with the interview panel, Mr. Wilkinson (Cyril) and Mrs. Waters. He introduces them to Curly and Elaine. 'Oh we know Elaine at head office, don't we Cyril?' says Mrs. Waters. To Elaine she says 'How are your parents?' Poor Curly plasters a smile on his face and ushers everyone upstairs but the defeated look he gives Reg says it all.

In the back room at The Rovers Raquel is complaining about her life to Betty. She's tired of spending all her time pulling pints and serving meals to men. It transpires that even though she spends a lot of time at the Cricket Club with Gordon she ends up making tea and sandwiches or doing the washing up. Betty says well at least you can have a drink with him after the game. Yes, agrees Raquel but the whole team comes along and all they talk about is 'googalies ' and batting averages. (I must admit I really felt for Raquel at this point, I'm married to an Australian and have been subjected to more than my fair share of cricket discussions!!). Betty asks if Raquel is going off Gordon. She admits that, while being really nice and a good cricketer, he's not the most exciting bloke she's ever met.

In the bar Jack is relaying his failed attempt at debt repayment to Des. Des tells him it is unlikely that BS will be pursuing it in court as it wouldn't be cost effective and also that Alf was obliged to inform Jack that he was selling the debt. Jack considers this a victory. Des stirs it by mentioning that maybe BS will just skip the legal proceedings and take matters into his own hands and hire some 'heavies' to collect the debt, it could turn nasty he warns if they don't pay up. 'You mean violence? ' gulps Jack. 'Depends' says Des 'you never know with blokes like that.' Hmmma new worry for Jack.

In a corridor at Bettabuys Elaine, Curly and another bloke await their interviews. Elaine remains cool and composed while Curly frets and worries because so many people are being interviewed. Elaine comforts him by saying that the interviews are all for show and they probably already know who they want for the job beforehand. She sits there looking chuffed with herself while Curly has visions of the dole queue.

Back at the Brandon Scott Retail Empire Alf is busy criticizing Brandon's relocation of the booze & wine to behind the till. It'll never work says Alf, people like to browse when they're buying wine, look at the bottles, read the labels. Deirdre says BS reckons the move will cut down on shoplifting. BS has sneaked in behind them and overhears the last bit. Alf turns to leave but is confronted by BS. 'Here to buy or to criticize?' asks BS. 'I won't be bothering you again' says Alf. 'I'm afraid you have bothered me today already Mr. Roberts' sneers BS. He tells Alf he shouldn't have told Jack how much the debt was sold for and furthermore if Jack fails to cough up he will be seeking reimbursement from Alf. Alf huffs and says forget it - when you bought the shop you bought the debt. End of story.

Curly is the last lone soul in the corridor at Bettabuys; he is pacing liked a caged animal. Elaine exits from her interview with Mrs. Waters complementing her hard work. This does not go unnoticed by Curly. Elaine gives him another of her smirks as she passes by him and Curly goes into the interview room.

At Curly's house Jack is startled by someone hammering on the door. Expecting the 'heavy brigade' brave Jack peeps through the letterbox.

'Who is it?' Jack meekly asks.

'It's me you daft ape, let me in' demands Vera.

Jack opens the door and hustles her in, sneaking a furtive glance up and down the street before shutting the door. He fills Vera in on the events of the afternoon ending with Des' warning about hired thugs. Vera tells him he's being daft. Jack decided to err on the side of caution and stay home from work that evening lest he get his face rearranged by one of BS' hired goons.

Thinking he just wants an excuse to skive Vera advises him he had better be at work tonight or he WILL have his face rearranged but not by the 'heavy brigade' but by her!

We join Curly nearing the end of his interview. He's been asked a question about profit percentages in the poultry department. His answer seemed good to me, I won't elaborate but it sounded like he'd been swotting up on all the quarterly reports. Mrs. Waters looks ready to end the interview but Reg butts in and implies that the Weatherfield branch of Bettabuys is unique as there is no competition nearby and that would be why the store is profitable not because of good management, (Doesn't speak volumes about Reggie does it? After all HE was the manager until a week ago.) So, Mr. Watts what would happen if a new shop opened across the street? Please answer Mr. Watts, what your combat strategy would be and lets not have vague, stereotypical answers please but with precise actions, using figures to illustrate you answer if possible. Curly looks like he could reach across the table and happily throttle Reg.

At the Rovers, behind the bar, Jack is visibly nervous and freaking out every time the door opens. He tries to skulk off to the cellar but Betty sternly reminds him its Raquel's night off and he's needed upstairs as she's the only one serving.

Alf & Audrey enter the pub. Audrey is trying to convince Alf to part with £800 for a trip to Spain. Tightwad Alf says no. Audrey declares this isn't a problem, they have joint accounts she'll just use her credit card to book it.

Reg & Maureen enter. They are discussing living arrangements for after they get married. They are interrupted by Jack asking about BS. 'Is he violent' Jack wants to know. No, says Reg, he's the sort to get people to do his dirty work. This does not comfort Jack.

Curly bursts in shouting 'I WANT A WORD WITH YOU!' It's directed at Reg but Jack nearly has a coronary. Curly rips into Reg accusing him of sabotaging his interview. Reggie remains quite calm and tells Norman to relax, sit down and have a drink; he'll explain everything. Reg tells Curly it was obvious Mrs. Waters wanted 'the girl' right from the start and was halfway to convincing Cyril of the same. Plus 'the girl' gave a brilliant interview adds Reg. He says he had to put Curly under pressure to show Waters & Wilkinson what he (Curly) was capable of.

'You know who got the job don't you?' asks Curly.

'The best person got the job, now have a drink and keep your fingers crossed.' Reg will say no more.

Vera & Tommy drop in on Sally and ask her to go to the corner shop and get some diapers. Vera says she can't go back to the shop until the debt business is sorted out. She hands Sally the money and they leave No. 13. Vera spots BS talking to a Delicious Stranger in front of the shop. Thinking he's a member of the 'heavy brigade' she thrusts Tommy at Sally and takes off down the street.

In the pub Des is confessing to Jack it was just a wind-up about the hired henchmen. 'Does Brendan Scott look like the sort with connections to the Manchester Mafia?' he asks.

At that moment Vera bursts into the pub yelling at Jack to get out the back quick as one of the heavy brigade is right behind her. In walks the Delicious Stranger and points in the vicinity of Jack and Des. Vera snatches a beer bottle off the bar and waves it in the Stranger's face. (I guess nobody told her it's a bit more intimidating if you smash the bottle on the bar first). 'If you take one step towards our Jack I'll brain you.' Des tries to intercede. 'Keep out of it' yells Vera. 'And watch you brain my brother with a bottle?' says Des.

Vera looks confused and Jack peers out from his hiding place below the bar. 'Hiya kid, all right?' says Des to his bewildered brother.

End Credits

Tammy

Carol Copeland: CLARE KINSALE Sam Owens: FREDDIE EARLLE Mrs. Waters: ANN ARIS First appearance of Colin Barnes: IAN EMBLETON
Written by: KEN BLAKESON Directed by: JULIAN FARINO

Friday (3565, Friday 9 July 1993)

First we find ourselves in Number 9 where our Kid is fumbling with his shoelaces after what was no doubt a restless night. Jack is still in residence and lends an ear and a shoulder as Curly ruminates that he must suffer from a form of masochism, does he get pleasure from enduring the pain of a dominant partner, "me and Reg", like. It's the only explanation he can come up with, Reg is a sadist enjoying doling out the pain, and he is a masochist, enjoying receiving it. You know, Curlylad, You spend too much time on yer own, is Jack's considered opinion, You need to get out a bit more. LOL Curly becomes defensive about the injustice of all those years only to have an underling come along and be put in charge above him. He'll tell Head Office, that's what he'll do, just what he thinks of their decision! Jack steadies him, reminds him of all the unemployment, he won't even get his job back on the bins! Curly continues fixing his shoes and mumbling until it sinks in what Jack said, not even the bins? And it brings him back down to earth with a jolt. He allows that yes, if he doesn't get the job, then he'll . . . he'll . . . he'll do whatever job they tell him to, and leaves with a self recriminating "Masochist."

Across the road Colin has been up with the birds and is tucking into a huge English breakfast. He has also woken Des who comes downstairs, chagrinned to see that Colin's scoffed the lot. No brekkie for Des, then but he doesn't say anything. He tries to find out why Colin's there but all he gets is a light hearted "I thought I'd drop in on the off chance" Seems Colin hasn't been in touch since before Des and Steph split. Lot of water under the bridge since then, comments Des wryly but he declines to elaborate. Colin offers to get some grub in and cook the tea which is accepted. Des hands over the spare keys and Colin is told to make himself at home. Off to work.

Curly is now in the corner shop with a face like a . .. stretched welly, glumly tossing an apple up while chatting with Deirdre, pessimistically describing the summer as all downhill now they've had the summer solstice. Hadn't she noticed the days getting shorter? Quite the opposite Deirdre mutters, looking pointedly in Brendan Scott's direction. Brendan oozes up and asks Curly if there has been any news on the job front and from the interest in his eye I would say he didn't know as much as he proceeds to pretend to. I think it was a case of a combination of not wanting to admit being out of the loop and wanting to jerk Curly around a bit when he says he's heard from a source that Miss Fenwick showed herself quite well in her interview. Curly anxiously asks if he has heard anything about his own performance. Ah that would be telling now wouldn't it?

Audrey's in the Kabin whining about Alf's worsening case of tightwaditis since he's retired. They all agree, including Phyllis, you ought to spend it as you can't take it with you but Phyllis allows that she wished her husband had been able to save a little to leave her when he died. Colin enters on the look for a newspaper for the movie listings. He introduces himself. He ends up buying yesterday's paper which Mavis sells him with some acrimony. I have no idea why she seems to be so put out unless it's scotched her accounts or something! Colin flirts with Phyllis before leaving. Phyllis decides it would be a good time to get to Des's to start her cleaning early (so as to find out a bit more about the other Mr. Barnes. She's away and when Audrey turns back to pay her paper bill she realizes her credit cards are gone! Wherever can they have got to I wonder?

Elaine finds Curly lurking outside the back of the store. He finds out that Reg was in the store earlier and made an appointment to meet with Miss Fenwick at 1:00. Curly's uneasy, wondering what it means that he wasn't contacted and they both discuss this, could it mean the successful one is told first or the unsuccessful candidate? Curly spies Reg crossing the parking lot and accosts him and mithers him to tell him if he's got the job or not. Reg seems to be taking great pleasure in leading Curly around by the nose and tells Curly to meet him in the Rovers at 1:30.

Phyllis lets herself in to Des's and explains her presence to Colin who explains that he's just off the boat, he's a "Merch" (Merchant Marine). He also happens to mention that that he's going to cook for Des tonight and once he ascertains that Des still likes steak and kidney pie, flirts outrageously with Phyllis to get her to assemble the recipe for him, leaving him to pop it in the oven. He leans over her shoulder, dropping his voice to even sexier tones in her ear while massaging her shoulders. Touch me like that and I'm anybody's, she admits and succumbs to his charm, agreeing. When he saunters off, she actually shivers and exhales hard, MOP!

Back to the corner shop in what was the funniest scene of the day in the end. Emily and Deirdre are chatting about Percy's self enforced low profile after the climax of the clamping incident. They joke about bringing back the tradition of village stocks, pelting the offenders with rotten tomatoes. Brendan Sod, er, Scott, lobs his two pennies in, defending the reputation of his produce. Just about this time, Vera struggles in with Tommy in his push chair. She's humbly begging Mr. Scott to reconsider Jack's offer to pay the debt off in installments. He's adamant no matter how much she cries poor and put upon. Deirdre steps in and remarks that Vera probably shouldn't have the baby out, him having mumps and all. The change in Scott is astonishing as he visibly pales, shrinking away from Vera and the baby. Vera clues in on target and immediately, to Scott's horror, picks up Tommy to face level, causing Brendan to pull out his handkerchief in a failed attempt to look nonchalant as he starts to sweat and fumble the inadequate piece of cloth over his mouth and nose region all the while trying not to be obvious about his terror of disease. Vera moves closer, keeping up her ramble of excuses, "How can I not take him with me? What choice do I have I can't leave him alone after all, . . ." "Yes, but, why don't you . . " Brendan utters, failing to keep the panic out of his voice. Vera smoothly goes on, "If I could just get this debt sorted out. . ." "Leave it with me, " He stutters in defeat, only wanting to see the back of them " and we'll discuss it later" eventually acquiescing to the repayment plan in theory. Vera's every so chuffed and expresses all her gratitude humbly. Given the inch, though, RVera, as expected, runs the mile with it and asks if she can take a loaf of break with her now on the slate. In order to have the diseased child out of his personal space he snaps Why Not! As he adjusts his handkerchief, nearly weak with anxiety now, Vera gathers the baby and settles him back in his chair, thanking Scott effusively and leaves. He decides he needs to see to something in the back. Deirdre and Emily who were visibly clamping their gobs shut so as not to burst into laughter, crack up! Audrey pops in just then to see if her credit cards might have been left there and yes, she's already notified the police and card companies to cancel her accounts. She dreads having to tell Alfeh she's lost her cards. He'll kill her!

Will he then? Alf at this moment is in the bar ordering up a pint. He borrows a pair of scissors from Betty to snip a loose thread and retreats into the gents as it's inside a pocket. In the meantime, Audrey comes in and when he emerges, he sees her and quickly hides the implements in the inside jacket pocket. She confesses that she's lost her credit cards. He doesn't seem bothered and then admits, when Betty asks for her scissors back, that he didn't want to go into debt over this holiday so he cut up her cards! (Are you surprised? I saw this coming a mile away!) Audrey goes up one side of him and down the other and warns him what she'll be snipping into bits when she gets him home and storms out leaving Alf gaping at the bar before he rushes after her as if he was surprised by her reaction!

Over t'other side of the bar, Curly is restlessly awaiting Reg, with Jack encouraging him to relax. Reg arrives and takes great pleasure in leading Curly up the garden path, winding him up about Elaine's stellar performance, she's got everything they like to have in a candidate at Head Office. Curly's face drops lower and lower but Reg adds, everything except extensive experience working on the shop floor. Could it be???? Reg takes the opportunity to be the first to congratulate Curly. Curly hoots, hollers and shouts triumphantly! After three years he's finally a MANAGER!!! Jack calls proudly to the others the good news and they all beam broadly for Curly's good luck. Yes!!!!!

Outside the pub, Audrey and Alf are still going at it, Alf on the receiving end of most of it. Audrey castigates Alf for allowing her to be so worried and then embarrassed for telling everyone, calling the police, etc, She nearly gets hysterical when he protests that they have to start tightening "us belts" and starts tossing things at him from her handbag, an old emery board to strike his matches on, a couple of old paracetemol, if he finds a wall to bang his head against, they might be useful. Oh take her wallet too, that'll sell for a few bob! She grabs the car keys but he is reluctant to go with her as he has a full pint of beer he's just paid for on the bar! That does it, Audrey zooms off down the road with Alf hollering and whining about how he'll get home! Take the bus fare from my purse!!!!

Back to Bettabuys, Curly approaches Elaine, trying to be graceful about the whole competition but she's loaded for bear. She's very bitter that she didn't get the job, the third try in 9 months and it's all because she's the wrong sex. Curly protests that he was under Reg's thumb being blocked from promotion for years. That, she snaps was before he got his promotion when Curly was still a threat to him. He gives up trying, noting that it sounds more like sour grapes to him, her attitude. That doesn't help much and she accuses him of getting the job because for one, he's Reg's mate and for another, Reg wanted someone in charge that was already in his back pocket and she stalks off.

This next scene was played with a stiffness, a polite but civil demeanor which could be a first small step for father and son to rebuild a broken relationship. Steve loads crates of tshirts in the car. Jim approaches gingerly and a few terse greetings are exchanged before Jim gets to the point. His mother has had another heart attack and he's going to Belfast tonight. Steve, taken aback, shows some concern for his grandmother. Jim reacts with humiliation when Steve awkwardly offers his father money in case he needs any for the fare. No he's ok, but he thanks Steve for the offer. They sort of shuffle around each other a bit more, while Jim asks Steve to keep an eye on the house and accepts Steve's best wishes to the relatives. There isn't a raised voice or an insult or even a hint of sarcasm on either's part, not even when Steve unsurely offers his father, "Safe journey" and Jim uncomfortably replies after hesitating "All the best now.."

Curly proudly arranges the items on HIS desk in HIS office and bounces on HIS chair like a boy on a new bed. He rings briskly for Miss Fenwick. She reluctantly enters and the two of them more or less make amends for their earlier conduct. Well hers mostly but he magnanimously "understands" and wishes her all the best in her future. She looks at him sharply. Didn't Mr. Holdsworth tell you? She's to be his new full time assistant! Neither of them looks very enthusiastic.

Des nips into the Kabin to pick up a paper. Mavis sarcastically remarks that he ought to keep hold of it so Colin won't have to buy it tomorrow (what IS up her bonnet?) Des hears about Colin's rather spirited visit to the Kabin and replies to Mavis' inquiry, Colin only drops in on Des when he wants something. He arrives back at his house and calls out. No answer. But he smells something. I think, Oooh yum, Steak and Kidney pie! But Des opens the oven to a billowing cloud of black smoke and a plate of charcoal just as the phone rings. It's Mum! Des listens for a minute then tells her he'll get Colin to call if he shows his face there! (as if he has no idea where he is).

Where his is at the moment is telling a tall tale in the Rovers to Betty, Raquel and Phyllis about disguising a bloke by shaving off his tache, the day after, the papers were all a buzz with the disappearance of Lord Lucan, implying. . . Betty calls him on it, Lucan died in 1974! They all have a good chuckle at his obvious outrageous charm. Over the other side, Curly, who should be brimming with glee is whining to Reg about Elaine. Reg should have told him! He has a good moan until Reg exasperated, asks if this is a wake or a celebration!? Celebration, Curly sarcastically comments, of your loyalty to Number One! Des enters, and pulls Colin to one side, demanding to know what's going on. He's had his mother on the phone telling him about some bird called Janice who's madly in love with Colin and worried sick as neither of them know where he is! Colin ruefully admits there is a Janice but he's feeling pressured and wanted some time to think on his own. Des seems to understand and goes along with it.

One last scene, Jim is packing. There is a knock on the door and it's Liz, come to say how sorry she is about her mother in law and to send her love on. Jim, his heart firmly on his sleeve with a pained expression speaking volumes more than just his worry about his mother, tries to get her to stay a bit but she is uncomfortable and wants to go, leaving him to his packing. She keeps her distance until it's time to leave and looks at him almost as longingly as he looks at her, leans in and kisses him quickly to say goodbye. She retreats nearly as fast, behind the door, leaving Jim staggering slightly with his effort to try to make the most of that fleeting kiss. Liz, he starts, but the doors is shut and he chokes up, whispering through a tear, "If you want to stay . . ."

Diane Johnston

Sam Owens FREDDIE EARLE
Written by MARTIN ALLEN, Directed by JULIAN FARINO


Originally transmitted: 12, 14, 16, 19 & 21 July 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 12 - Friday 16 June 2000
Episode Numbers: 3566 - 3570

Monday (3566, Monday 12 July 1993)

It's Monday morning, and we open at Curly's as he reads from a greeting card, which has arrived in the post. "Good luck on the first day of the rest of your life-you deserve it," from Angie, which he thinks is nice. Jack however, sitting at the table checking the racing form, probably, thinks that Angie is sorry she gave Curly the brush-off, now that he's coming up in the world. But he asks Curly if he's nervous about his first day as manager of Bettabuy's, since he's heard Curly pacing since dawn. Curly is anxious, it's doing his head in wondering what he'll say to the staff, and commences deep breathing to calm his nerves. Jacko is ready with advice and a fatherly scrub at the egg on Curly's tie, telling him that he must start as he means to go on-put the fear of God into them, and give them the lash! Curly replies that they've abolished flogging in the grocery trade. Jack thinks work is unnatural-only done to get money, see your mates, keep out of the way of the wife, and keep you dry in bad weather, so bosses are needed to keep the workers at it. Once he hears Ivy calling Curly all sorts, then he'll be proud of him.

At Des's house, Colin saunters down the stairs yawning, and Des tells him there's no grub, but Colin is easy, and wants Des to skive off work, and have a laugh with him. Des retorts that he's the one the workers make excuses to, so Colin brings up Raquel as a source of some fun, but again, Des isn't amused and warns Colin not to mess with her, and to keep away from her, as she's a friend. Colin obviously thinks differently, judging from his knowing smirk.

In Curly's office, he bustles about, telling his new assistant Elaine Fenwick to have the whole shift assemble in the canteen. She sarcastically asks if they're to have a Nuremberg Rally? With his arm pointing up at her in an unconscious Nazi salute, Curly tells her that if she sees any resemblance to Adolf Hitler, feel free mention it, but not in company time. Her sour grapes in evidence, she grumbles that they're not allowed to make jokes now, then, but Curly replies with "Of course we can, but only if I laugh at them." She then responds with a click of her heels and marches out to rally the staff, leaving Curly looking bemused.

Deirdre and Brendan Scott are measuring space in the corner shop, and Deirdre wonders if he's redesigning it. Brendan has even greater plans-not just for the shop, but for the British grocery trade. He's pleased that Deirdre knows all the customers, and wants to ensure that she always calls them by name, and with a cheery, welcoming disposition. She's ready to take the huff, thinking he's criticising her for not doing so already. He replies that to the contrary, her cheerful attitude is an asset.

The staff at Bettabuy's are assembled in the canteen and Curly enters, clipboard in hand, and informs them that he's the new manager. Sam Owen begins to sing "For he's a jolly good fellow," but no one else joins in, and Curly cuts him short with a quick "Thank you." He then describes Reg Holdsworth as a hard act to follow, (I know how he feels!), since Reg had forgotten more about the grocery trade than all of them put together. Maureen bridles and clears her throat, causing the other staff members to smile and discomfiting Curly. But he launches into his theme-no speeches, but a dialogue and teamwork between management and staff. Red teams, and blue teams. Confused Sam pipes up that he's been a city man, man and boy, and he won't be on any Red team. When Curly says, "I'm talking," Sam replies that "I thought you were listening." Curly tells him that he'll give him a good listening to later!

On the Street, Hanif and Denise drive up to the Salon in his sporty red car, returning from a weekend away together. ( I think it was a Citroen, from the design of the badge on the front, but if any knows for sure, correct me-I never could tell one car from another!) Denise is pensive and seems regretful and Hanif is a little confused by her attitude, since he thought they'd had a wonderful weekend. She agrees, and when he says he can't work her out, she tells him that oh yes he can, and kisses him, then leaves the car. He tells her he'll call, and she responds drily, "Yep, I know," and slams the door shut.

Back at Bettabuy's canteen, the staff are showing distinct signs of weariness and boredom, as Curly still expounds on his theories of dialogue and the value of the worker in the retail trade revolution. When he finally tells Miss Fenwick-he sounds the W, and at Fenwick's store in Newcastle, it's 'Fennick,' so that jumped out at me-to open the doors, Sam comments to Maureen that for a man who doesn't make speeches, he canna half go on! (With a name like Owen, I thought Sam was Welsh, but he didna half sound Scottish when he said that.)

As Denise tidies her hair in the Salon, Audrey bustles in asking to be fitted in for a facial, and is told she can have all morning if she's quick, and agrees to get 'the works', but has to arrange for someone to look after "the spaniel." Denise remarks that she didn't know Audrey had one, and Audrey responds with, "Neither did I!" and leaves in a fluster, colliding with the arriving Fiona. Denise is annoyed that Fiona is five minutes late, which seems to perplex Fiona.

Audrey arrives at the café, complaining to Gail that she wants a facial, but what to do with Alf-he's driving her crazy. Gail has no sympathy, since Audrey wanted him to retire. Audrey moans to Alma that she can't even enjoy a bubble bath in peace, as he'll knock at the bathroom door, wondering how long she'll be-like a dog scratching, and in walks Alf! Audrey quickly arranges a full English breakfast-the works-for Alf too, and tells Alma to do it slowly, and proffers the cash, saying that Alf won't abandon a meal that's paid for. Alf is quite happy, since they're short on groceries at home since they left the shop, forgetting to buy them!

Back at the Salon, Denise is still narked at Fiona, this time for breaking something, and Fiona tells her that it's Denise's fault for nettling her and getting her all nervous. She wonders what went wrong at the weekend-Denise says nothing did, it was all wonderful-so Fiona can't understand her bad mood. Denise tells her there's more to life and next time, break the cheap stuff. Audrey arrives, eager for her treatment and some gossip, and begs to be covered with a towel if Alf shows up, so he won't know she's there.

Brendan and Deirdre are still discussing commerce in the shop and Deirdre is puzzled as to why he bought a small shop. He responds that she ought to wear a mobcap, with her distinctive coiffure, and gets a bit lyrical about the prospects for the grocery trade. He believes there'll be two types of shops, future and past, nightmare and dream: the vast supermarket, and the tiny corner shop, smelling of coffee and dried fruits, and offering personal service. People have needs greater than just the groceries, and will cherish the human contact of the small store-but, better yet-a chain of small stores, and he'll be ready for them, and so will Deirdre in her mobcap and gingham, or, better still, bombazine! Deirdre is dumbstruck!

After the ads, we're back at Sally and Kevin's with Sally, Gail, Joe Broughton, and their three children, as Sally describes Gail to Joe as a career woman. Gail demurs, and says she's just a high-powered skivvy, that's all. Joe explains that if he was a woman and had a choice between a career and bringing up children there'd be no contest. Gail tells him that for many around here there is no choice. He says everyone is trying to be happy in their own way, and Sally is the only person he knows who seems to have the knack. Sally laughs that he doesn't know her, as she bustles about the room. He say's that he's noticed the difference in his son Jonathan while he's been at Sally's, but she thinks that it's because he's settled down. Joe begs to differ. He believes it's because Sally is happy. Sally responds that she gives Kevin a dog's life all the time, but Gail disagrees, saying that they're the happiest couple she knows-because they don't know any better! Sally laughingly agrees, then Joe and Jonathan leave, with cheery 'Byes' all round.

At Des's, Colin is chopping carrots and tells Des that he was the only English-speaker on his last boat in the Merchant Navy, and that he's finished with boats. Des tells him that he said the same thing the last time they met, which was at Des and Stephanie's wedding. Colin looks chagrined, and says how sorry he was that it all ended as it did. Des shrugs it off saying that he and Stephanie didn't speak the same language, but Colin contradicts him saying that it wasn't that way at first. They agree that the language of courtship is unique. Just as one gets fluent, Colin muses, one realises that there's nothing left to say.

Raquel is expounding at the Rovers' to Denise, and Alma, with Jack at her elbow, and waxes philosophical about the attraction between men and women, which she explains has nothing to do with sex. "Says who?" asks Denise, and Raquel tells her that brainy people have been into it. Jack asks, "What is it, then?" Raquel explains-confusingly-about mirroring each half of a face, to make two different complete faces, losing track halfway through. One face is the female, and the other is the face one would have if one were male. The attraction men and women feel is the recognition, unconsciously, of the same sex face of a person one would like. Her audience is amazed-Jack wonders if her informant had his hand on her leg-but she says no. He was someone from Gordon's cricket club who works in market research! She continues, that people always draw themselves, when they draw, and boys always draw boys, and girls draw girls. As she turns away, her treatise ended, Denise asks Alma. "Is it just me, or is she from another planet?" Meanwhile, Alf is after a pint, telling Jack that Audrey is driving him crazy, and Audrey and Rita discuss him, in a booth nearby. Audrey needs Alf to have a hobby, and Rita makes suggestions, such as fishing, but Audrey recalls the trip with Don Brennan, which caused so much bother, not to mention the maggots. So that's out, but a shed sounds promising. Ken and Deirdre are discussing her new boss Brendan near the wall, and she thinks he's barmy. But Ken says that barmy is relative. Compared to the rest of them, he may be, but sit him down with two high court judges and who'd know? When Curly arrives, Brendan offers him a drink, and Curly asks for champagne, but that's not in the cards, from Brendan. Jack asks him how the day went, and he replies that it was between triumph and disaster, the nightmare happened, as per Brendan's earlier reference? A dog in the store, a Great Dane, left dog do everywhere-the entrance was blocked, and mops and disinfectant abounded-it was the D-Day landings all over again. Brendan thinks it was Curly's finest hour, and thinks the champagne would have been appropriate after all. Back to Audrey and Rita, and the plot thickens. Alf is to have a stereo with headphones, mind, in his shed, but what will he do there?

As Colin and Des chat after their meal, they discuss Colin's girlfriend Janice. After a fling, Colin wrote her letters from his lonely glory hole among all the foreigners, and waxed poetic off the coast of Valparaiso, suffering from "the raptures of the deep." She thinks it's love, and has a deposit for a house, but Colin is on the run. Des thinks it's time he settled down, but Colin knows that it's the man who wrote the letters that she loves, and that man isn't him. He meant what he wrote at the time, when apart, but the reality is different. He has to write her the most painful letter of all.

Back at the Rovers', Alma and Denise discuss relationships too, specifically Denise and Hanif's. She is wary of becoming smitten with him. They had a wonderful weekend, but on the way back, as she and Alma have both experienced before, he began to minimise the experience and distance himself, and she knew what he was up to. When he said, "I'll call you," she could have brained him. Brendan and Curly are discussing commerce. Brendan reiterates his vision of the renaissance of the small shop, but Curly asks, "Where is the Renaissance today?" As Denise leaves the pub, there is Hanif at the Salon door, and she rushes over to him with pleasure. "You swine! I thought you had something important to do?" "And it wasn't until I was halfway to Bradford that I realised what it was," he replies, and a kiss ensues. Alma finds Denise's scarf inside the Pub and leaves to catch Denise, only to see Denise swinging around, laughing, in Hanif's arms. Alma returns inside, and asks Raquel to return it to Denise. She's just gone, you can catch her, says Raquel, but Alma says that Denise is busy, and adds, about Raquel's theory, a ladylike raspberry. Leaving Raquel with her usual, puzzled expression. So much for philosophy

Ruth Hempsey

Colin Barnes - IAN EMBLETON Elaine Fenwick - PIPPA HINCHLEY Sam Owen - FREDDIE EARLLE Joe Broughton - JOHN WHEATLEY
Written by - JULIAN ROACHE Directed by - EUGENE FERGUSON

Tuesday (3567, Wednesday 14 July 1993)

Phyllis is seen entering the corner shop. Inside, it appears she has entered a time warp. The shop is a high class Edwardian epicerie complete with an Edwardian shopkeeper in traditional provisioner's front button apron tied high around his chest and topped off with a straw boater. No hang on, this IS Weatherfield 1995. Phyllis is in the refurbished corner shop, now called Scott's Provisions. The proprietor greets Phyllis effusively and steers her towards the display of crusty bread which is worthy of Harrod's food hall. Phyllis admires the bread, especially the long crusty loaves, but tells Mr. Scott that the loaves are too big for one person and she wants the sort of bread with lots of preservatives 'cos it keeps longer. Also, where's her usual tinned stuff? "Mrs Barlow, please come and help Mrs. Pearce". Enter Deirdre looking like a refugee from Upstairs Downstairs, long dress, pinafore and mob cap. (Pity she couldn't find some granny glasses instead of her oversized spex.) Phyllis is startled and then amused. "Just don't say anything" glowers Deirdre. Phyllis is looking for her favourite tinned pasta (Scarios by the description) but Deirdre tells her they no longer stock those as they aren't "traditional". Mr. Scott offers taglietelli verde instead. Denise enters and is shown the tasting table laden with gourmet foods which Mr. Scott describes as traditional. "Ooh where's the tripe and trotters then?" asks Denise. She moves to the back of the store where Deirdre implores her not to tell anyone about her new work attire, especially not Ken. Denise tells her Hanif turned up unexpectedly the evening before and they went out clubbing. Deirdre says it sounds as if he's getting serious. Denise thinks not. "The only one he's in love with is himself."

(As I checked this over, I realized that it was only yesterday that Brendan was measuring in the old shop. How did this transformation take place in less than 24hrs? Maybe there is a time warp on the Street)

The subject of Denise and Deirdre's conversation is seen in his car with an older, sari clad lady to whom he is giving a lift. She starts to quiz Hanif about the time he came home last night and who his was with. She is his mother. Hanif admits he was with Denise. Mrs. Ruparell gets out of the car and as soon as Hanif disappears she hails a taxi. Her destination? Coronation Street.

At the Webster's Kevin is leaving for work just as Joe arrives with Jonathan. Throughout this scene little Rosie sits at the table and paints quietly. Jonathan however extemporizes throughout the proceedings in a very natural manner. He contradicts his father in a convincing manner (I DO play with guns!) and squirms around at the table in contrast to demure Rosie. The whole point of this scene is to let Joe know that Kevin will be working late tonight.

In the Bettabuys staff room, Maureen is giving Elaine, Vera, RTommy and several staff extras Reg's opinion of Curly's short-comings in the leadership department. Curly appears and they all looked embarrassed. He tells them to carry on. Vera explains the awkward silence by telling him it was 'womens' talk. Curly is only briefly embarrassed and then plunges into a spirited explanation of his new staffing structure. Vera sticks her oar in even though she's only there to see Ivy. Curly explains the staff will be divided into "cells". He will set them free from the old pyramid structure and allow them to "blossom". He quotes Chairman Mao but Maureen thinks the chairman's name is Morgan. Elaine rolls her eyes.

At Denise's Salon Raquel is looking to get her split ends dealt with. "Because if the light's behind me it looks like me head's on fire". Phyllis says that's not bad, she should see Deirdre. Denise and Phyllis tell Raquel about the changes at the shop. A client dressed in a sari enters. She requests an appointment for a trim with Denise. Fiona tells her it will be a hour before Denise is free. The client will wait.

Elaine and Maureen are members of the Pink Cell and are waiting for Curly to arrive for a meeting. However, Reg has arrived with a foil topped bottle and wants Maureen to come and celebrate the sale of the house. This is premature because Reg actually only has an interested party who is coming to view the house that afternoon. Waiving aside protests from Maureen and then Curly that she is the Pink Cell Contact Worker, Reg sweeps Maureen off for an afternoon of sell and sellabration.

In the salon, Denise is showing Mrs Ruparell the results of her handiwork in the mirror. In the time honoured tradition of Street hairdressing, Hanif's mother looks exactly the same as when she came into the salon. She came for a trim but since she wears her hair up only her hairdresser knows for sure. However, she is really at the salon to gain information about her dearly beloved's girlfriend. Engaged in conversation about family and children by her client, Denise reveals she has no children but has had two husbands and does not want to marry again. Her client asks about boyfriends and Denise says she has a very nice boyfriend but it is not serious. Mrs Ruparell reveals her identity to a gobsmacked Denise and tells her that Hanif talks about her all the time. Furthermore Mrs. Ruparell has the impression that marriage has been discussed, but obviously Denise does not feel the same way as Hanif.

Afternoon in Scott's Provisions and Sally is admiring the emporium. Joe arrives and is greeted effusively by Jonathan. (the kid really shows acting promise, he's right on cue!) After remarking on the shop transformation "I feel like I'm in a time warp" (So it IS true) Joe says he's finished early and by the end of the scene has wangled a trip to the park with Sally and Rosie. Ken bursts into the shop with a grin that widens as he sees Deirdre, who groans when she sees him. "You could have spared me this", says Mrs. Mobcap. Ken tells her he nearly brought his camera. Mr. Straw Hat appears and fawns over Ken. Ken tells him he's got what he came for but congratulates Brendan on having "caught the look". BS almost simpers and says he believes in creating an "ambience". Ken, ever the historian, offers up some suggestions for authenticity such as rickets and head lice. (Strange suggestions. I would have thought unpasturized milk, weevily flour and maggoty cheese would be more authentic in an Olde Shoppe.)

Ken also suggests that the store is just the sort of photo op the local paper would welcome. Brendan thinks this an excellent idea. "This has gone far enough!" says Deirdre pulling off her cap and starting to undo her pinny. "I work here in my overall or I don't work here at all!" As Brendan pleads with her not to leave Ken smirks, "Nice to know I can still get you to take your clothes off!".

Over at Maude's house the starcrossed lovers are arguing in whispers about what to do with Maud when the prospective buyer turns up to view. Reg feels that he should show and tell while Maureen keeps her mother in check. Maureen tells him since he doesn't live there he should keep Maude out of the way while she does the showing. They are thrown into panic when the door bell rings. "I suppose that's someone come to put me in a home" says Maude. Maureen tries to reassure here at the same time trying to get Reg to wheel her mother out of the way. "Don't give her any tea, she'll want to go," Maureen shouts as she runs to answer the door.

Meanwhile Sally and Joe and the kids are at the duck pond in the park. Joe tells Sally he is pleased that Jonathan is settling down and is better behaved. He really appreciates what she's done. "It's nice to be appreciated" says Sally. "Oh, Kevin doesn't appreciate you?" Sally excuses Kevin because he's been working really hard recently. Joe then proposes they go and have a pizza, since Kevin will be home late. Sally declines this offer, saying Rosie gets cranky if her routine is upset and besides she promised to take Kev some sandwiches. "Some other time then?" Sally agrees that would be nice.

At Grimes Manor the frantic farce is still in progress. Contrary to Maureen's instructions Reg has made Maude tea. "I need to go", she announces suddenly wheeling off while Reg has his hands full. She heads for the dining room where Maureen is showing Mr. Stevens the house in her "posh voice". Maude does the whole "Aged Parent" act. "Have you come to take me to a home?" she demands. Maureen's excuse that her mother is confused and forgetful is Maude's cue to inform the buyer that Maureen told her not to mention the mice or the rising damp. Hasty exit of prospect. As Reg and Maureen follow him to the door, Maude smiles in triumph. The set is Maude's!

Fiona is sweeping up in the salon. She probes Denise about Hanif. "Must be getting serious?." Fiona is surprised when Denise informs her that she is going to finish with Hanif because it's getting too serious. "It was meant to be a bit of fun but he's fallen in love with me." "Oh poor you", replies Fiona sarcastically. Denise decides she had better look good when she tells Hanif to get on his bike. She asks Fiona to give her a "do". (No good can come of this request)

On the Webster's couch, Sally is snuggling up to Kevin. The camera zooms in close as she tells him how awful it must be for Joe not to have anyone to cuddle with in the evenings. She tells Kev how Joe wanted her to go for a pizza, but she would feel funny going for a meal with someone else. Perhaps they could go out for a meal? It's ages since they went out. That would be great even if it was only pizza. The camera pulls back from this little monologue - Kevin is asleep.

(BTW although a pizza in the UK is a pretty basic deal it is not as cheap has Canada. The last time I had a chain pizza in Manchester the pizza cost about £12.50. Medium size - no drinks.)

Denise drops by the cafe at closing time to confide in Alma. (It's as I feared the "hair do by Fiona" consists of unpinning one side of Denise's French pleat and letting it hang in a clump down the side of her face) She tells Alma that Hanif wants her to marry him or at least he's told his mother that. "His mother?" Alma is impressed. He must be serious! Denise tells Alma not to get excited as she's not going to say yes. "Oh, is that why you haven't had your hair done?" (Alma says this sarcastically and does not seem to understand the basic truth of this remark.) The two friends talk back and forth over this dilemma. Denise is flattered but does she want to lose her independence so recently regained? "Say yes" urges Alma.

In the Rovers, Colin is chatting up Fiona. She makes him work at this a bit before agreeing to show him Manchester's night life. Denise and Alma enter and see Hanif. Alma makes her excuses and leaves. Hanif wonders why Alma disappeared so quickly. Is something wrong? "Have you seen your mother today?" "Not since this morning." "Well I have and she told me something about you." "Not how I got expelled from school?" Denise tells him what his mother told her, however Hanif's reaction is to laugh. He explains that for years his mother has been bugging him to go out with a certain girl. He's not attracted to her nor she to him but to keep his mother off his case he told her he was in love with Denise. "She must have had you worried? Denise smiles weakly in answer. "Look, I promise I will never ask you to marry me" says Hanif, "Happy?" "Estatic" murmurs Denise through smiling teeth. "Oh that is so funny." Hanif is still chuckling. "Oh yes, I laughed all day," replies Denise realizing her first reading of Hanif's intentions were correct.

Libby Seekings

Brendan Scott MILTON JOHNS Joe Broughton JON WHEATLEY Jonathan Brougton TOM LEWIS Hanif Ruparell AYUB KHAN-DIN Mrs. Ruparell SURENDRA KOCHAR Colin Barnes IAN EMBLETON Elaine Fenwick PIPPA HINCHLEY Mr. Stevens (prospective home buyer) JOSH MORAN
Written by FRANK COTTRELL BOYCE Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Wednesday (3568, Friday 16 July 1993)

We start off in the street. Outside the shop, Brendan is dressed up as a shopkeeper of olde. He tips his hat to Alma as she passes by and then, proceeds to fiddle with his display. He looks up at his new sign "Mr. Scott's Provisions" and looks as though he drank all the cream available.

Where was Alma off to? To see if Denise could turn a "knackered, middle-aged chipfryer into a sexy young girl about town?" Denise says no but he can do a nifty cut and blow later. Alma settles for that as it's cheaper than a facelift and asks Denise what's up. Denise confides in her that she made a mistake about Hanif. She tells Alma that Hanif had told his mother the tale about being in love with another woman so he wouldn't be pushed into a family arranged relationship. Alma says she hopes that Denise told Hanif she didn't think the situation so comical. Denise says she has a remnant or two of pride left and Alma counters with "that old thing - has cause more heartache than all the fellows in the world" Alma says there is still a silver lining as he is still keen on her and to stick with it. Denise confesses that she stayed awake most of the night to see if he would ring her. Alma says "you ring him - lay your cards on the table - what have you got to lose?" Denise appears rather thoughtful as Alma leaves.

In Mr Scott's Provisions, Emily asks Dierdre ( who is sans cap!) how Tracy is doing. Dierdre says she is enjoying the job as she was born independent but not that academic. She says it is Ken who is the one bothered about the schooling. Emily says he just wants the best for her. Brendan walks by the two of them and looks at Dierdre saying "haven't we forgotten something, Mrs Barlow?" Dierdre tells him she said all the pitter pat she was supposed to greet Emily with but that is not what he meant. "The headgear. It's not only there to look attractive (lol) but for hygienic purposes, too." Dierdre apologizes, saying she must have forgot and dons the cap. As Emily leaves, she passes Phyllis on her way into the shop. Phyllis heads for Dierdre to give a few comments on poor Deirdre's outfit. Deirdre says she thought Phyllis wasn't coming in the shop anymore but Phyllis says that now as he has seen the errors of his ways, she can forgive and forget with the best of them. I think the free vouchers has quite a bit to do with her change of heart, too! J

Vera wheels Tommy into Bettabuys and encounters Curly. He is glad to see that Tommy has recovered and asks if Jack knows this. Vera says oh yes but he wants to wait another couple of days - make sure there are no more germs lurking around. Not music to Curly's ears, that!

At the café, Gail tells Alma about Ivy and Audrey. One can't get her husband to look twice at her and the other is velcroed to her husband. Alma tells her the two women should swap! Mike walks in as they are giggling over that suggestion and asks why they are laughing. Alma says wife swapping and Mike perks up wondering if they have been invited to a swingers party. Alma asks Mike if he is doing an Alf on her - dogging her every footstep. Mike says as much as he loves her, that isn't his scene. He wants to know if she is up for going to a posh frock do that night. She says she must have had a premonition as she has a hair appointment later. He says "didn't I tell you it was a foursome? Might ask them to pop up for a night cap after." With a wink, he leaves and Gail grins in the background.

At the salon, Audrey is getting her hair done. Denise asks after the time and when Audrey hears it, she says she has few moments of freedom left as Alf's council meeting should be over now. Denise laughs and says she thought she had all the freedom in the world now with Alf retired. Audrey tells her she doesn't have a husband but a human sniffer dog!

Alf walks down the street and asks Emily if she has seen his lady wife. "why have you lost her?" "no I'm not worried. She'll turn up. We're always together these days. Between you, me and the lamp post, I think that is why she was nagging me to retire - she likes a bit of company, does Audrey." (got the giggles here!) Alf looks down the street and notices the new sign over the shop and his old Alf's mini mart is being binned. Alf hurries to rescue it and enters the shop. He asks Brendan what he was thinking of. Brendon, sarcastic git that he is, asks Alf if he expected him to hang it over his mantelpiece. Alf says no but he could have asked if he wanted it. Dierdre says that's silly and what would he want it for. Alf says he'll treasure it and anyway, it's not half as silly as she looks dressed as old Mother Reilly! Brendon is not amused.

At the Rovers, Colin is chatting Racquel up saying her mum knew what she was doing naming her after a movie star. Racquel tells him her last name isn't Welch but then, thinks that they do have the same initials. She, Don, Colin and Jack then talk about sailors, girls and ports with Jack commenting on how he wished he had that many chances. Racquel tells him he would have still married Vera as who else would have had him!

Back at Bettabuys, Maureen is on the till until Reg comes by. He tells Miss Fenwick to take over the till as he is taking Maureen off for an appointment. Miss Fenwick, looking a bit stunned by this, tells him she is off for her lunch break. Reh rides roughshod over this and her comments on Mr. Watts' roster and whisks Maureen off to have a look at a house. (good lord, he never stops touching at her!) As Miss Fenwick harumphs at them, Curly comes up asking what is going on. She fills him in and he is not pleased with Reg's high handedness, promising to make sure Reg realizes he is the manager of the store now, not Reg.

Audrey is paying for her treatment at the salon when Alf walks in, carrying his sign. She gets a load of this and tells him to sling it back into the bin. Alf says he could murder for a poached egg on a potato cake. Audrey grabs that idea and tells him to go on without her as she will go the café for a natter with the girls. Alf says that's a good idea as Gail does a nice potato cake and goes with her , ignoring Audrey's attempts to dissuade him. That leaves Fiona and Denise in the salon. Fiona tells Denise to just call Hanif as she has been on pins and needles waiting for the phone to ring. Denise gives in and calls him for a dinner date that night Don walks in as she is making the date and his face falls when he hears who she has been talking to. He asks for a cut later on.

In Curly's office at Bettabuys, Reg and Maureen are playing lovey dovies and running around Curly's desk when the man himself walks in. He and Reg have a set to about who manages what and how they got to where they are. Reg apologizes and then, they have a chat about the house hunt.

Ken walks into the shop under death threat from Dierdre if he says one word about her costume. He asks after Tracy and how she is doing , saying he thinks she is avoiding him. Then comes another discussion on Tracy and her schooling with Dierdre saying they can't force her and Ken thinking she is only thinking short term. A few comments later, Ken leaves and Brendan tells her to conduct personal business on her own time. (he reminds me of a fly on the wall - hears all, sees all and is creepy!)

Miss Fenwick asks if one of the staff can go as his wife is in labour. Curly tells her yes and that he told Reg to keep his hooter out. She seems impressed but tells him, on her way out, that she would have got it in writing.

As Don washes his vehicle, Phyllis asks how his day has been. He's a bit short with her as he watches Hanif arrive at the salon. Inside, Alma is on her way out as Denise goes to get changed .

Gail is waiting for Martin in the Rovers so they can go to the pictures. Gordon is in there and is introduced to Gail. Racquel tells Gordon that Martin is studying to be a nurse and how that is a wonderful vacation. Curly shouts "vocation" and Racquel returns with " that's what I said! " Curly tells Jack , in short, to get out! Jack realizes his holiday at Curly's is over.

At the restaurant, Denise has her heart to heart with Hanif. She tells him how she used to be the non-commitment type but her feelings and thoughts on that have changed. She is very upfront with him telling him she only realized her feelings when she had that conversation with his mother.

Back at the Rovers, Reg, Maureen, Audrey and Alf share a booth, drink and house talk. Colin, Des and Gordon are at the bar talking with Racquel. Talk turns to beauty queens and Gordon gets stroppy with the boys and Racquel does the same with Gordon.

Hanif and Denise continue their talk. She asks him if he feels the same way about her as she does him. He is honest with her and tells her no. She throws her drink in his face after he tells her not to get hysterical. He throws down money for the meal and leaves without another word.

Judith Cooper

Written by ADELE ROSE Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Thursday (3569, Monday 19 July 1993)

Any episode that starts with a shot of Colin in a singlet can't be bad.

Colin is up and at 'em. He's made toast and coffee which he offers to a rough looking Des. Des is unimpressed with the events of last night and warns Colin off Raquel. Colin asks why and Des says he reckons that Raquel still carries a torch for him. Colin scoffs at the notion and says what really put him off was Raquel's boyfriend. He complains that said boyfriend is a geek to boot. 'If he's first division I reckon that puts me in the superleague' he tells Des. Des doesn't comment just points out the messy state of the house to Colin and asks him to do a bit of work that afternoon. (Geez, these two sound like an old married couple, not brothers).

In the Mini-mart, or rather Scott's Provisions, BS torments two indecisive kids over what to spend their £1 on. Raquel is browsing and Angie walks in.

'If it isn't Rapunzel' says Ange.

Raquel responds with a 'bog off' (the retort of the intellectual!).

'Actually, that was meant to be a compliment. Didn't I hear you had 2 blokes scrapping over you in the Rovers, Des' brother and Gordon?' says Ange.

'Well, what if it is true?' says the Blonde Wonder.

'Odd'

'Why?'

'Well, you ended up with Gordon didn't you?' smirks Angie. Ooh, MEOW!

Ken and Denise enter the shop, which is suddenly as busy as Safeway the day before Thanksgiving. Denise sees Don and asks him if he wants to drop in the salon for a coffee later. He says he has an outpatient's clinic appointment later but will try to stop in. She nods and looks down at the jar in her hand (its full of a yellow substance). 'Comfort eating' she says to Don. (What?? Comfort eating is NOT a jar of mustard or lemon curd!!! Comfort eating is a nice bottle of red, a family size bar of Dairy Milk and a tub of Haagen-Dazs, she's female how can she not know this?)

At the checkout Brendan is labouring under the assumption that dressing like a Little House On The Prairie reject has empowered him with irresistible sex appeal and he flirts with the girls at the counter. He has a go at being charming and says if he can see 4 unattached young ladies gracing the start of his day he's not complaining. Deirdre - who just walked in - says she's just glad to be making the list! (BS is actually smiling excessively in this episode, urgh, it just makes him look creepier).

'Raquels' not unattached, she's got Gordon the Gopher' Angie helpfully adds.

'Actually, the way things materialized, ANGELA, I ended up with a choice. Something that won't mean much to somebody like you' Raquel replies.

'Now, now ladies please don't bicker it doesn't become you' says BS.

'Neither does supping from a pint pot it's no wonder she's strapped for company. Excuse me.' Raquel turns and flounces out. Ooh. MEOOWWW.

Outside #13 Joe pulls up, he's late dropping off Jonathan. He tells Sally he slept through the alarm but called into work and blamed his tardiness on Jonathan being poorly. You're already late reckons Sally, why not come in for a coffee.

Over at Des', Phyllis lets herself in with her key. Colin says hi, offers her coffee and tells her he's going for a shower. (Oh goody, I hope the 'Shower-Cam' has been installed). Colin does not get away though, Phyllis corners him in the kitchen - she wants a word! Uh, oh.

At the salon Don turns up to see Denise. She's obviously not very happy and still smarting from Hanif giving her the flick the night before. Don churns out all the clichés for people recently dumped. 'You were too good for him.' 'You'll find someone else.' 'A course of penicillin will clear that right up'. This doesn't comfort Denise and she admits she'd fallen harder for Hanif than she'd planned. Don is quick to offer her his shoulder to cry on (literally). They share a weird kind of hug, Denise has a little sob and goes off to tend to a customer. Don just stands there looking down, a little confused and flustered yet happy, like he's just realized the Viagra is kicking in.

Back at Des' Phyllis is lecturing Colin on the perils of excessive boozing. She also comments that Des has had a very hard time lately and doesn't need Colin hanging around being a bad influence on him. Colin says he knows he just wants Des to have a bit of fun. Then he asks Phyllis if she's the cleaner or the therapist. Phyllis informs Colin that Des pays her the grand sum of £2.50/hour (£3 since you arrived) and that she's worth every penny! Colin just grins and offers her an extra £10 if she'll do some ironing. Phyllis doesn't answer but the look on her face says it all. Looks like she been won over by both Barnes boys!

In front of No13 Sally is leaving with Jonathan & Rosie. Martin crosses the road to say hello and Jonathan makes a break for it while Sally is distracted. Jonathan runs up to the door of #11 and finds it ajar. Martin investigates but Sally says she heard noises earlier; she assumed it must be Steve. Martin lets himself in and discovers that no ones home and the place has been burgled. And - OH NO - the McD's have the exact same MFI* dinette set that I had, oh the shame!!

At the Rovers, Betty is serving up 2 plates of meat & veggies to Reggie. (Bargain it was too, only £2.80). Maureen enters and they take their lunch to a table while Reg asks how Maude took the news about the offer Maureen had for the house. Maureen hasn't said anything and starts discussing wedding dresses instead. Reg pulls her back and says that Maude needs to be told that the house has been sold. Maureen says she's been putting it off because Maude will just think selling up is just Reg's way of dumping her in a home. 'But its not' protests Reg, totally unconvincingly.

(In the background Martin comes in and is seen telling Steve about the break-in).

Back to Reggie & Mo. Maureen simpers and strokes Reg's face (Gack! Sherrie Hewson is one heck of an actress; she makes it totally convincing that she's mad about Reg). She says that she wishes Maude KNEW Reg like she does and could trust him. I think Maude's one heck of a good judge of character!

Don is propping up the bar and Denise walks in. 'I thought you were down at outpatients all day' she says. 'No, no I called and cancelled' says Don. 'Is that because of me?' Denise asks (Well duh girl!). Don hesitates for a second before admitting he didn't want to leave her 'in that state'. (Yet Denise obviously did not know that Don was making himself available to her until that moment when she walked in to the bar!!??)

Steve arrives at the Queens and tells Liz about the break-in.

Emily has come over to Sally's to mind the kiddies while Sally goes next door to wait with Martin for the police and Steve & Liz. After Sal goes Emily looks at the kids and reckons that in all the fuss Sally probably forgot to feed them. She ducks into the kitchen to whip up another batch of Spaghetti Hoops.

At No11 Liz surveys the trashed living room. Steve tells her all the burglars did was mess up the place and take the TV and video. He jokingly asks if she reckons the insurance company would believe he left £2000 in cash in a kitchen drawer. Liz cuts him off with an icy glare. She's getting quite distressed while looking for a photo of Katy. She can't find it and reckons they took it because it was in a silver frame. (Aww, ok I did feel a little bad for Liz).

Colin & Phyllis (now totally won over by Colin it seems) are at the bar in the Rovers. Colin orders a pint and a brandy. Raquel fawns all over him speaking in a breathy Marilyn Monroeish voice. Betty butts in but before she can say too much Colin apologizes for his behaviour the previous evening. Betty gives him one of her patented snorts and tells him OK, but twice and he's barred!

Raquel goes to get the brandy and Colin asks Phyllis if there is anything he should know about Des & Raquel. 'No' huffs Phyllis 'just stay clear of that one, she's a tart!'

Out on the street Reg whistles at Angie walking past his apartment window. He & Maureen ask her to come up for a second. Angie looks a bit apprehensive but goes up.

At the McD's Steve is getting ready to go, Liz asks him if he will move back in to the house until Jim returns from Ireland. Steve agrees and leaves. Liz then says to Sally that she'd better ring Jim and tell him the news. Sally offers to do it but Liz reckons she'd better to it herself otherwise it'll look like she doesn't care. Sally points out the burglary isn't Liz's fault. No, admits Liz, but Jim reckons its her fault no one was there in the first place. Sally then says (in that fake caring voice we use when we're trying to pry juicy details out of someone) that she doesn't really know what happened between Liz & Jim. Liz says she's not really sure herself.

In the back alley behind the shop Ma Ingalls, no wait it's just Deirdre, is sweeping and bends down to pick something up.

At Reg's pad Angie is being offended by Reg, he thinks she 'makes frocks'. She's quick to point out she designs them; she's not a bloody seamstress. No, Reg concedes but a seamstress would need a pattern to follow and that's where Angie comes in. 'Polytechnic didn't much prepare you for the outside world, did it Miss. Freeman?' asks Reg (he's just so smarmy sometimes!!). Maureen tactfully intervenes and explains she's having a hard time finding something she likes but she has seen a few pictures in magazines she could show Angie to give her an idea what she wants. Angie agrees to do it but wants to know what they think she's worth as a designer. Maureen says she'll be paid accordingly. 'Within reason' Reg adds. Maureen leaves to get the mags and Angie turns to Reg and says 'Outside world prices Reggie, its going to cost you a fortune'. Ha, ha!

Back at No11 Deirdre knocks at the back door holding the thing she picked up off the ground. It's the photo of Katy (sans frame). Liz is delighted to have it back.

Des arrives home to his lovely, clean house. Colin is ironing Des' jeans (Who irons jeans?). Des says this is all Phyllis' handiwork. Colin admits it's true Phyllis has been round but he can't give her credit for doing much today. Just then poor Phyllis comes down the stairs, head in hands and groaning. She's been passed out upstairs because of the drinking session with Colin at lunchtime. (I really hope she had more than 1 brandy).

Across the road Sally is wiping Jonathan's face. He's been throwing up as a result of being force-fed two helpings of Spag Hoops and ice cream. Joe arrives to pick him up. Sally explains about the break-in and apologizes over and over for the spewing incident. She assures him Emily is trustworthy; she wouldn't leave the kids with just anyone. Joe's very OK with it all and tells Sally it's not a problem these things happen. Let's face it here, he's such a smitten kitten Sally could have left the kids with a stranger off the street and he'd have been OK with it!

In Scott's Provisions Deirdre is saying 'No sorry, I've already got plans after work.' It would appear BS has asked her to go somewhere after work, we don't find out where but I'm going with an Amish barn raising. She says again that she'd love to really, but that she's made plans with Ken. 'Upstairs Ken?' says BS 'I was under the impression you two were divorced'. He really seems to have his nose pushed out of joint over this. D says yes, Ken's been having a rough time at work and she thought he needed cheering up. BS says he thought it would be nice to discuss work away from work but they can do it some other time. D kind of sighs and rolls her eyes behind his back. He does look disappointed though.

Joe is leaving Sally's and he mentions that he has a few days off coming up and would she & Rosie fancy a day out somewhere. Sally is very keen and they agree to arrange it.

Back at the Rovers Betty is serving an OJ to BS. BS looks thoughtful. Betty asks if Mrs. Scott ever joins Brendan in this part of town. BS reckons a backstreet shop and pub aren't his wife's idea of fun. He mentions something about the break-in at the McD's. This is the first Betty's heard of it, she does a bit of snorting and huffing, she's even more put out when Raquel admits she knew about it too but didn't say anything to her.

Martin comes in and orders a pint. Reg oozes over and Martin hands him an envelope, for which, Reg pays for Martin's pint. Hmmm, wonder what's in that envelope.

Deirdre & Ken walk in and are watched, with a lot of interest, by Brandon.

At the Queen's Steve is leaving for his night watchman duties at No11. Colin & Des enter. Colin gets the drinks in and tries some pointless chit-chat with Liz. Liz bursts into tears and runs to the back of the pub. Poor Colin is left wondering what he said wrong. Des assures him that, for once, it wasn't him.

Cut to a shot of a tense looking Maureen and Maude finishing their dinner. (These two could be understudies for the Beauty Queen of Leenane). Maureen just blurts out that she's had an offer on the house. Maude says she knows and doesn't think its high enough. Maureen hasn't mentioned a price yet - looks like someone's been snooping! Maude says she saw the offer letter 'accidentally'. Uh-huh, sure. Maureen says it is enough and she is going to accept it regardless of what Maude thinks! Maude rants that this is just part of a ploy to shuffle her off to an old-folk's home so that Maureen can shack up with Reg. Maureen says of course it isn't and that Maude will have to stay in a home but it's just temporary till Reg's flat gets sold and they can buy a bungalow for the 3 of them.

At the Rover's, Reg is drooling over the contents of the envelope. Hmmm, retirement home brochures. He pumps Martin for as much info as possible on the homes. Martin assures him the residents are well taken care of, nice food, and lots of activities. Reg savours this with glee, then Martin hands him the price list, this takes the shine off Reg's happiness but only for a moment. Some things are worth paying for he decides. We end with a shot over Reg's shoulder of the brochure, 'Pasturegate: Private Residential Home for the Elderly.

*MFI - cheap furniture store in England with IKEA aspirations.

Tammy

Written by: PAUL ABBOT Directed by: DAVID RICHARDS

Friday (3570, Wednesday 21 July 1993)

Today's Coronation Fashion File episode was brought to you by Jost Contessa dry red and, to keep it completely local, the Best of Matt Minglewood.

We're coming to you live from a late summer's afternoon on a little back street in Wetherfield. The always smartly attired Angela Freeman saunters down the street and crosses the road where Steve MacDonald, wearing a student casual look, is delivering a lovely bouquet of flowers to Sally Webster on behalf of his mother as a thank you gift. Sally's outfit of widely striped pants in muted colours and a fresh crisp summer green short sleeved blouse sets off the look of a young mother to a tee. She looks every bit as fresh and lovely as the posies! Martin arrives in some nondescript generic type casual outfit to pick up David, one of three small children suitably dressed in brightly coloured children's wear. Joe also arrives, looking end-of-day rumpled in his civil servant suit and tie only he's not there to collect his son as he has an appointment with a solicitor to discuss divorce proceedings. May he leave Johnathan an extra hour?

Next door, it's a sharp contrast in fashion do and don't as Angie in her short clipped haircut and coordinating outfit is chatting with Mother Reilly Barlow who, as a saving grace, is still avoiding that horrible mob cap at least. A bit of gossip is exchanged wherein Angie is told that Hanif, her former boss, you know, the one that wore matching red coat and Mercedes sport car, dumped Denise the hairdresser who's clothing choice is generally as uneven as her hairstyles. Derek Wilton, looking snappy in a suit far outranking his lowly caretaker's job and sporting a deep tan, is shopping for a meal-for-one. He's got to go back to work for the evening as the school is open for parent teacher consultations. Mr. Scott slithers over to Derek and attempts an on the spot survey. What attracted you to our Meal for one display??? Derek, logically, answers that he's eating along tonight as he has to return to work. Scott tries to sell him a half bottle of wine, specially brought in for solo diners but Derek hardly thinks it would do to go to work with wine on his breath. (As opposed to beer breath after a lunch at the Rovers as he sometimes does?) Derek pays for his items and has a friendly word for Deirdre and leaves. Mr. Scott takes Derek's smile as a man masking loneliness. Nonsense, Deirdre scoffs, he's a married man! Brendan, in a voice dripping with irony and a dollop of "been there, done that" wryly comments. "Quite".

Angie's next stop is the Salon. Ooh Denise is wearing a jacket I remember well, one that I particularly covet in fact, a short sleeve but longer length tunic style jacket over a black outfit, the jacket sporting wide vertical stripes of black, yellow and orange. Ange manages to persuade Denise to meet her later for a drink and a post mortem of the aborted Hanif romance.

Phyllis, familiarly coifed in her usual lavender locks, gets ready to leave Des's. Colin's dressed suspiciously ready for a casual encounter, in light coloured trousers and a shirt in a fetching shade of sky blue that really suits his dark brooding good looks. Phyllis's suggestion that Colin make her hard working Desmond his tea tonight is met with scorn and he gets scolded for his trouble, Phyllis leaves with a wink and a smile at the handsome young man just the same and Colin leaps up after the door is shut and bounds up the stairs.

The café is closed but Ken is there having a quick bite before returning to school. Gail has accommodated him to soften his home room review of her son! Maureen wheels Maud into the café as she has an appointment with Angie. Maud is, even in these early days, displaying one of her collection of hats, this one a sweep of pleated material with swirls of a taupey sort of colour over a pale background. Doesn't really match the pretty blue blouse peeking out from under Maud's overcoat. Maud is complaining bitterly about being abandoned in the closed café while Maureen meets with Angie upstairs but is mollified when Gail offers her a cup of tea. Alma mentions Reg in context with Maureen (i.e. isn't Maud's daughter engaged to .. . ") and takes the opportunity to sound out Reg's neighbour's opinions on her future son-in-law. She notes that though they manage to directly avoid answering, instead citing his good job and always being smartly turned out, they all seem to know him but none of them consider him a pal. Very telling, methinks.

We're transported to the Queens where, yes indeedy, a casual encounter is taking place, Colin is leaning across the bar listening to Liz giving vague "it didn't work out" reasons why she is running the pub on her own as well as "in other areas". She has eschewed her usual Streetwalker grunge look in favour of a wide lapelled loose jacket worn, sleeves pushed up over a black shirt. I can't see the length of her skirt, however, as we only see her from the waist up from the angle that Colin had been wedged over cross the top of the bar, I'd wager she hasn't completely shed the image. He charms her with a few words of wisdom but later, after observing her struggling to manage a large and somewhat complicated order, offers to help out behind the bar. Being short staffed, Liz finally agrees and Colin gets stuck in.

In the Rovers, Martin and Gail are having a drink before heading to the school. Steve gives a very confusing answer to Martin's question about whether Steve will be staying in the house after Jim returns. Steve slopes off in a mood. Must have confused himself and all. Maureen and her mother are at the other side of the room, Maud playing the martyr so that her daughter can assure her mother that she will always be wanted, both at the wedding and in her life after. Maureen waves to Gail on the way to the bar and to use the phone. Gail mentions to Martin that Maureen is Reg's intended and yes the older lady is her mother. Martin takes it upon himself to open a large can of worms, albeit, unknowingly. He approaches, and though Gail never told him the name, knows it's Mrs. Grimes. He introduces himself and that he's a student nurse, currently doing his practical at a nursing home. He says that Reg had asked him to find out if the home was a decent place as his mother in law would soon be taking up residence and he just wanted to assure Mrs. Grimes that the place was indeed a very nice place and they would make her more than welcome, and he hopes that was a help. Oh, very much, Maud hisses, eyes narrowed. Martin leaves and Maureen returns. Maud wastes no time jumping (figuratively of course) all over Maureen about sticking her in a home so she can carry on her life with Reg. Maureen goes very quiet and insists she had no idea Reg was planning this and he will be sadly disappointed in his plans.

We're back with young Sally where Joe has returned from the solicitor, playing a very good game of being distracted and vulnerable little lost sheep now that his divorce is under way. Sally falls for it and is suitably sympathetic. Joe slickly works it so that Sally admits the flowers aren't from Kevin who never buys her flowers, not even realizing the subliminal points scored against her beloved husband. He even manages to compliment Sally by using Johnathan "Sally's a lovely lady isn't she John?" and leaves after Sally tells him he needn't check in if he's going to be late next time.

We are removed to Reg's flat where he's making a bold fashion statement tonight. Donning a vivid red-rust shirt and matching bow tie that compliments his colouring and white hair, he's added a vest that has blotches of the same colour on a chalky gray background. He is attempting an impromptu fashion show, exhibiting a bright canary yellow sweater he's bought himself while Maureen impatiently interrupts, determined to have her say and she launches into an assault, confronting him about the nursing home scheme. He freely admits it. She is furious that he always gave the impression that her mother was welcome to live with them after they married and then he goes and tries to arrange this behind her back! Reg stands his ground, after all, red IS a confidence inspiring colour, and cites Maud's prior history. She broke them up with her interfering and can Maureen really say she isn't out to do it again? She'll keep on trying and he can't be happy starting out their married life with her as an albatross around their necks. She's not being fair, she really isn't, he accuses Maureen, she's not seeing it from his point of view! This has hit home and Maureen tearfully asks if he really does want to put Maud into a home? YES! He hollers, NO!!! I DON'T KNOW!! He wails with frustration.

Over at the school, Ken is giving Gail and Martin an acceptable report on Nicky's progress at the end of his first year in the upper school (Ye Gods and Little Fishes, it's nearly the end of July! I knew the school system was different but that's sheer torture! LOL) Derek pokes his tanned nose in the school room to check on lightbulbs and adds his educated observations as well. Nicky is doing just fine, as Derek has never seen any trouble with him on the playground. Very telling.

Colin's back home now and quizzing Des on the whereabouts of Liz's husband. Des warns Colin to leave it out, (he's done that with Colin's interest in Raquel too, the man doesn't want his brother to have any fun, does he?) Des does admit that Jim is currently in Ireland.

Back to school, Mike Baldwin has arrived, wearing a typically Baldwinesque natty suit. Maggie Redman, in a sleeker shorter hair do, is dismayed to see him there without any warning (which was probably his plan so that she wouldn't say no). They plaster polite smiles on when Gail and Martin pass by and then return to bickering. But Mike insists that he has a right to find out how Mark is doing and promises to be just an observer. Yeah right. In a pig's eye.

Popping over to the Rovers, Reg and Maureen are still bickering, Maureen furiously insisting Reg won't try anything like that again, he won't will he? Only if he thinks he can get away with it.. . er. . . no of course not. Later Maureen, still sulking, leaves on her own because she's worried that her mother is home upset. Reg sighs and wobbles out after her. Over in a booth, Angie and Denise, still sporting her coat of many colours, discuss the breakup scene. Angie does get a good chuckle over the mental image of Denise tossing a drink in Hanif's face and reckons Denise is better off out of it, considering the way Hanif treats his women. Martin and Gail arrive for a nightcap before picking up the kids from Ivy's but when they mention they've seen Mike at the school, it's clear that Alma knew nothing about Mike's evening's plans.

Ah yes, school. Maggie arrives at Ken's classroom, Mike trailing behind her. Maggie is resigned to his presence. Technically he does have a stake in being there. Hands up who thinks Mike has come along solely to rattle the cage of his rival? But the news isn't good as Ken reluctantly tells Maggie that Mark hasn't done all that well. He's concerned that Mark isn't concentrating fully on his homework, too many distractions perhaps. Before Maggie can really react, Mike jumps, knowing full well Ken means the time he is spending with his son. The two men start arguing and it deteriorates quickly, with Mike getting the upper hand, well, at least he seems to have pushed Ken's button faster and harder, with a crack about Mark finding it difficult to concentrate with Ken chasing his mother up and down the stairs all night. Ken loses his temper and orders Mike out, with Maggy seething and dragging Mike out anyway. Mike gets the last word, accusing Ken of lousy teaching skills and promising to do something about it.

Diane Johnston

Woman in Queen's Arms: FIONA KERR Maggie Redman: JILL KERMAN
Written by PETER WHALLEY Directed by DAVID RICHARDS


Originally transmitted: 23, 26, 28 & 30 July; 2 August 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 19 - Friday 23 June 2000
Episode Numbers: 3571 - 3575

Monday (3571, Friday 23 July 1993)

It's the morning after the Parent-Teacher interviews at the Comprehensive School, and as Alma and Mike enter the café, Alma is still furious that Mike accompanied Mark's mother Maggie to the interview with Ken, without telling her beforehand. Mike, as glib as ever, responds that if he'd told her, they'd have had a row, "Like we're having now?" Alma replies, in fake surprise, as she ties on her apron. She's angry not only because he went to the interview, but also because she felt foolish in front of Gail, because she didn't know what he was up to. He justifies himself by his concern at Mark attending the school, which doesn't seem to be helping him reach his potential, but Alma thinks that it's Maggie's business. Gail arrives, interrupting the argument, and after Mike leaves, hopes that "All this is nothing to do with me?" Alma snaps that no, it isn't, nor with anyone else, okay?

At the shop, Ken and Deirdre's topic of conversation is the very same interview, with Ken concerned that Mike would not acknowledge the deleterious effect of his entry into Mark's life, instead blaming the school, or Ken himself, as Mark's teacher, and Maggie's suitor. Deirdre tactfully asks if only Mike is at fault, and while Ken agrees that he has also been a new factor, he'd never allowed his relationship with Maggie to affect his relationship with Mark. When she asks him, "How can you be sure?" he wonders whose side she's on, but she explains that she can't help but ask how much of this conflict is the result of how Ken feels about Mike. Ken is definite that he never lets personal feelings affect his judgement in regard to his students. Colin, hovering behind Ken, excuses himself, being in a hurry, and as Ken leaves, Deirdre apologises for ignoring him, but his comeback is that he's used to being kept waiting by attractive women. Deirdre's face expresses her reaction: Oh yes, you're that kind of bloke, are you, in amused disbelief. There's no pulling the wool over her eyes.

Out on the Street, Nicky and Martin leave their home, with Nicky asking if everything was all right at his interviews. Martin assures him that on the whole they seem pleased with him, at school, and Nicky says he has been working hard. But, says Martin, for needing to pay more attention to detail in Geography, where he seems to be confused some of the time. Nicky replies that the Geography teacher says that about everybody, and Martin responds that he's worried only about Nicky, and after being reassured, Nicky hints at the 50p received for a good report last term. Martin coughs it up, and sends Nicky on his way with a fatherly admonition to zip up his coat. Boy, the kiddies wouldn't be satisfied with 50p today! Across the street, Reg bustles from the door to his flat, dapper as always, but Martin hurries over to apologise for putting his foot in his mouth the evening before in the Rovers', by telling Maud about the home in which Reg was planning to place her. Reg is surprisingly philosophical, looking on the bright side, feeling that once Maud gets there she'll love it, and they agree, "Right," and take off without further ado in opposite directions. Obviously not as sanguine as they appear regarding Maud's reactions!

As Des descends the stairs, ready for work, Colin enters cheerfully, with a bag of groceries, and once again we hear his reaction to a woman-Deirdre, he feels, is rather spirited. Des wonders if Colin will ever change. He's a ladies' man this brother, with less real feeling than Des has, for his lady loves. He is also ready with £50 per week for his board, but Des prefers to keep it casual, with a tenner now and again-then he can kick Colin out when he feels like it. And Colin's stay is to be only for a few weeks, as Des's long-term plans don't include Colin-not overly fond of his brother, is our Des.

At Maggie's flower shop, the now full-time employee Tracy Barlow asks how Mark is getting on at school. Maggie is on her guard, wondering what Ken has said, but relaxes when Tracy says she hasn't seen her Dad. She tells Maggie that Ken has always considered Mark to be a bright lad, who'd go to University, and Maggie hopes he will. Tracy however, is happy that she's finished with all that now, just as Mike looms up at the door, full of bonhomie, but Maggie is not pleased to see him. Tracy is sent to the rear to continue her bouquet building, while Mike and Maggie 'have a word.' She expected an apology for his boorish behaviour of the night before, but "It's more important than that. It's about Mark," says Mike. Maggie is incensed, and wants him to leave, but Mike has his say - Mark needs to achieve his potential and isn't doing so at the Comprehensive school. Mike wants to pay for Mark to go to not only a private school, but a 'public school' - the English elite of private schools - which shocks Maggie, and she refuses, full of reasons why not. Mike plays on her insecurities and maternal guilt, saying that Mark might never forgive her if she prevents him from having such an opportunity, and she might never forgive herself, either. "Go away! Leave us alone!" she cries. As he takes himself off, Tracy looks on from her corner, having heard every word.

Back at the café, it's the lunchtime crush, and Alma and Gail are still sniping at each other, until Alma slices her finger, and Gail sends her off to tend to it, in tears, to Gail's surprise.

Colin, in his tight green t-shirt, enters the Queen's Pub and orders a pint from Tanya Pooley, who obviously likes what she sees, judging by her smirk. She is in the midst of offering him an interesting evening, out with her, when Liz comes up behind her and sends her off to do some serving of other thirsty customers. The barman who was sick yesterday is now no where to be found, so Liz is short-staffed again. Colin cheerfully offers his experienced services, and Liz welcomes him aboard, just as Colin hoped she would.

Mike shows up in the café again, apologising once more to the still mightily miffed Alma. He's going to tell her everything from now on, but Alma doesn't want to know. Mike insists, and explains that he's visited Maggie Redman, and also his plans for Mark's education. Alma is worried about the cost, and when Mike happily tells her, "We can afford it, we're both working," that's the last straw for her. She tells Mike in no uncertain terms that Mark is his son, he'll pay, and takes off her pinny, saying, "I quit!" and storms out of the cafe, leaving Mike looking hangdog, and Gail exasperated.

In the Rovers', it's still lunchtime, and Betty serves Deirdre, with a joke that the food wards off evil spirits. Deirdre smilingly asks if that means she'll have a "Scott-free afternoon?" Emily declines a meal, having sought Deirdre out for a favour, and they briefly refer to Brendan Scott as "a funny little man," who might drive Deirdre to drink, in the end. Emily solicits Deirdre's help at sorting for the Church's Saturday jumble sale, adding that she can have first pick of anything, if she likes, and Tracy is welcome too, but no, Tracy is working full-time now, Deirdre reminds her. Tracy is "happy as Larry," with no regrets at leaving school. Ken, of course, isn't so pleased, but Deirdre, once again the voice of reason, feels that as it's Tracy's life, there's no point in forcing her to do something she doesn't want to do. At the bar, Raquel and Des are chatting, and Raquel, nicely togged out in a fancy French pleat hairdo and deep decolletage, striped sweater, is eager for news of Colin, whom she thinks is charming-sort of a man of the world. [Beware, Raquel!] Des is less enthusiastic, and Raquel thinks he is hard on Colin, but Des tells her they've never been close, and doesn't even know if he likes his brother. Raquel of course thinks that is awful, and is reassured when Des grudgingly agrees he probably loves Colin. He's pleased that he's made her happy, and maintained her ideal of what family feeling should be. Then up rolls Gordon, not entirely to Raquel's delight, with apologies to Des for the little upset the prior evening. Des is entirely unconcerned, saying that he feels like thumping Colin himself sometimes, as he makes his good-byes. Gordon likes Des, but denigrates Colin, and Raquel is quick to defend him, listing all his ports of call. Poor Gordon counters with Ostend and Jersey, but Raquel is unimpressed - Colin's allure seems to be that he's a breath of fresh air, having been elsewhere than Wetherfield, and she sarcastically leaves Gordon looking disgruntled, as she puts down his limited experiences of foreign parts.

Mike and Alma are continuing their argument at their flat, with Mike trying to persuade Alma of the advantages of Mark being away at boarding school - more time with her, for example - but Alma is having none of it. She has Mike's number. Mike always has to have some new project in his sights, and never gives up until he gets his way. Alma herself, Mark, and now, persuading Maggie, Alma tells him. Mike counters by suggesting that he won't do anything unless she gives him the go-ahead: she will decide, and of course, Alma knows he's got her. "What can I say now?" she asks.

In the post-lunchtime lull at the Queen's, Liz brings out two drinking mugs as Colin dries glasses, and she's eager to thank him for helping out, while he's on holiday and should be enjoying himself. Colin reassures her that it's been enjoyable to have something to do while Des is at work. Liz tries to pay him, but he refuses, saying it was 'on him', and a pleasure. Liz asks him his plans, and, surprise - he's perhaps interested in a pub or restaurant, and goodbye to the sea. Liz responds that he'll be tied down, but he replies that he's been footloose long enough. She gets a little pensive, and tells him that she's the opposite - never having been footloose. When he asks about the missing barman, there's more smiling and simpering, and it's settled that he'll do the job, with pay, if he gets at least a week's work. "Yer on." Liz agrees, to the obvious pleasure of both. It's just a bit nauseating watching these two, in their little courtship dance, because that's what's been going on - him all smiles, and her likewise, with some girlish coyness thrown in-no doubt that this pair will be up to some hanky panky in the short term!

A resigned Alma returns to the empty café, as Gail is clearing up, and is sorry for her earlier tantrum. The partners make up, with Alma telling Gail that Mike is her problem, and she'll probably never sort him out, but they end the working day in harmony, finishing the cleaning up together.

Maureen shows up early at Reg's flat door, needing to talk to him, and he politely but huffily asks her to come in and sit down. Maureen is obviously ill at ease and tentative, but determined to speak up, and tells Reg that she has worried all day about everything he'd said to her the evening before, in regards to their future together, and of course, he's quite right! Reg heaves a sigh of relief, and melts, believing that she's changed her mind about Maud. However, she can't put Maud into a home. "It's too cold, too calculating," and Reg is upset all over again, but Maureen persists. There has to be a middle way, a compromise, whereby they can have privacy, but Maud will still be with them. Reg thinks that it's a tall order, but agrees to do all he can to solve their problem to everyone's satisfaction. He isn't happy, but is willing to accept Maureen's conditions.

Des returns home from work in the same dissatisfied mood that he's displayed all day, to find Colin at ease, reading the paper, and complains that it's all right for some, lounging around all day, and he doesn't suppose that Colin has made any tea. Since Des refused breakfast, Colin hasn't and Des pauses, then apologises for being 'shirty' that morning. He asks Colin to join him and Don for an evening at the dogs, but Colin declines, lying that an old mate has turned up, and that they're going to have a night on the town. Des gets his back up all over again, and warns his brother not to bring his pal home for a bed, at 1.30 in the morning. Colin assures him that that won't be happening tonight. Since we know he's working for Liz at the Queen's, we can only surmise what he's up to, and now we know that Des's low opinion of him is warranted. Don't know about Des being shirty - Colin is definitely shifty!

Deirdre is still waiting for Brendan Scott to show up at his corner Emporium, after 6pm, when Tracy turns up, jokingly complaining of being neglected. She's obviously proud of being a working girl, though, and rather than make the tea at home, wants to take Deirdre for a drink at the Rovers', and perhaps even a meal, to which Deirdre smilingly agrees.

Behind the bar at the Queen's, the joint is jumping, and Colin is in his element, suggesting that all they need is some entertainment. The usual badinage ensues, Colin guessing that Liz is only 28 or 29, and on being told that she's the mother of 19 year-old twins, remarks that she must have been a child bride. "Seventeen, and very stupid," Liz replies, but isn't too pleased when he mentions Jim, and wonders if he's been discussing her with Des. Just chitchat, he assures her. When she asks if Des knows he's working at the Queen's, he tells her no, because Des thinks he has designs on her. "And have you?" she asks. He tells her that the Tahitians say that a man who has no designs on an attractive woman is tired of life. She laughingly asks him if he expects her to believe that, and he says of course not, but it's true that there's life in him yet. Definitely got a touch of the Blarney, this one, charming most of the ladies at first sight and speech!

Deirdre and Tracy are finishing their dinner at the Rovers', when Raquel comes to clear, as Tracy goes for the coffee. Raquel is pleased to see a family together, prompting Deirdre to tell her it won't be too often, as she doesn't want Tracy to be lumbered with an aging mother. Raquel, believing herself to be paying a compliment, replies, "I hope I look as good as you when I'm your age." Once again, Deirdre's face says it all. Then Ken turns up, and they both agree that Tracy seems happy at her emancipated status, and pick up their morning conversation about Parent's day at school. Tracy has told her mother what she overheard of Mike's plans for Mark, and Ken, of course, on hearing about it, pulls a disgusted face.

The day ends at the Queen's, where it's clear that after hours, Liz has told Colin the story of her life - and now she's on her own. She doesn't know why she's told him, however. He reassures her, saying that it helps to talk and get things off one's chest, but she feels that it doesn't change anything. "It might help you come to terms with it," he responds. Liz is having second thoughts, and wishes she hadn't bared all, and he asks why. "Don't you trust me?" She does, but doesn't know why she should. He promises that he won't tell a soul, and won't remember a thing in the morning. "Why should you?" Liz asks. "I can think of lots of reasons why I should," he replies, "but it might be better if I didn't," and kisses her on the cheek, just as Andy walks in the door of the Pub to see it. Liz is obviously shaken to see him, and Colin quickly leaves, saying goodnight as he passes Andy. Andy looks both wary, and thoughtful. Liz tries to act normally, asking him what he's doing there, and of course, he'd been home, and couldn't get in. Liz tells him of the break-in, and the locks being changed. "Wise move," Andy says, "but all that's sorted now?" "Yeah, think so," Liz replies. "Sure about that?" he asks. "Course I am." "Right," Andy answers her, all the while, never having moved from the door, nor altered his thoughtful expression. Liz lowers her eyes, and we fade to the rooftops of the Street. Andy has seen a side of his mother, which supports Jim's opinion of her, it seems.

Ruth Hempsey

Colin Barnes - IAN EMBLETON Maggie Redman - JILL KERMAN Tanya Pooley - EVA POPE Gordon Blinkhorn - MARK CHATTERTON
Written by - KEN BLAKESON Directed by - DAVID RICHARDS

Tuesday (3572, Monday 26 July 1993)

In is morning in the Roberts' household and Audrey is picking up mail. A large envelope from the estate agent has arrived containing details of a property for sale in Lytham St. Annes. Alf thinks the price is too high. Audrey says it's just what they're looking for and wants to view it immediately. "Not today. We can't just trip off to Lytham" says Alf. (He really hasn't got the hang of this retirement business yet) "That's the whole point Alf, we can". She shakes her head. "Oh what's the use?" Alf retreats behind his Independent.

Over at the Kabin, Rita and Mavis are speculating on what Alf will find to do with his newly acquired leisure time. Rita says she can't see Alf joining Percy's Bowling club. Emily, who has been at the magazine stand approaches the counter and tells them that according to Mr. Sugden there is a waiting list. "Waiting for Percy to resign", says Rita. A car horn is heard from the street and Rita goes to the door to see what is happening. "Talking of exercise" Rita says, "Have you seen this?"

Outside Des has nearly run over Big Bird. Oops, no it's fearless Derek in a bright yellow jogging suit. "Sorry mate", says Des. "Could you make yourself more conspicuous next time?" Des wants to know where the party is. Derek tells him haughtily that he is trying to achieve something Des could not possibly comprehend. "A lively mind and a healthy body." He jogs off narrowly missing being run over by a milk float. (No, not a creamy soda fountain drink. An electric dairy vehicle.)

Outside Scott's Provisions Brendan is polishing his lemons. He tells Derek that Des was playing the comedian. "He certainly saw you. Well he couldn't very well miss you could he?" A smirk hovers. Derek wonders if the outfit is too much. Brendan assures him not and tells Derek to ignore the jibes and get on with his jog. Brendan's parting shot advises Derek that bananas are on special today. The smirk lands. Derek treats the remark with the contempt he believes it deserves and then jogs into the pillar box.

Back in the Kabin Mavis is mortified. "I told him to burn it or dye it but never to go out in it." She thinks all this activity on Derek's part is because of something she inadvertently said. The others winkle it out of her. "Well, I said he was putting on weight if you must know." Rita gives her a look but Emily, ever one to rescue a situation, points out that Derek is doing something about it. "I meant him to go on a diet, not dash around the district drawing attention to himself - and it's not funny Rita!"

Around the corner where Derek lately disappeared Jack appears. He ducks down as he passes the corner shop window. Head still down and walking backwards to be ready to run if his creditor should appear in the doorway, Jack backs into Andy coming out of number 11. Jack blames his strange behaviour on a sudden and mysterious back pain which just as suddenly and mysteriously ceases. Steve seeing his brother crosses the street the warn him off going round to see Liz on surprise visits. This exchange lets us know that Andy has told Steve he saw Liz being kissed by a stranger and this has been the subject of some discussion between them. Andy wants to close the subject and tells Steve he's looking for a temporary job. "How are you fixed?" Andy asks. "You're not suitable, mate. You worry too much."

Audrey is sulking on the living room sofa flicking through a magazine. Alf appears with his coat on. He is going to get a paper and tries to persuade her to come with him. A banging at the door is answered by Alf. Gail, Nicky, Sarah Lou, and David come bursting in. Sarah Lou announces that Rosie is sick and Gail asks them to look after the kids until Sally gets back from the doctor. Audrey bustles around organizing things for the children to do but she manages to show Gail the house brochure before she leaves. Gail Oohs and Ahs with enthusiasm and asks Alf if he'd like to live in Lytham. "Not at those prices" he replies.

In the Manager's office at Bettabuys Curly is telling Andy that staff rotas are pretty full at the moment and that he might not be able to fit him in. And says he thought that for old times sake etc. Curly goes in to Manager Mode and tells Andy that to expect preferential treatment because they know each other would be a mistake. He also expects to be called Mr. Watts not Curly. Elaine appears and is formally introduced. Curly then informs Miss Fenwick that Mr. McDonald will be joining them on a temporary basis on the early shift. Andy tells Elaine he won't be late because he only lives next door but one to the manager. "Employing another of your neighbours?" says Elaine after Andy has left. "It's my decision, I manage you assist," Curly tells her. Elaine wants to know what he is going to do about the losses on wines and spirits. Curly tells her to inform the staff to remain vigilant for shop-lifters. Elaine points out that it could be staff pilfering. Curly moves into rampant Manager Mode and tells Elaine his plan to have her keep an eye on the staff and search their bags when they leave the premises. Elaine thinks not. "You manage, I assist. You search and I'll watch"

In the Rovers, Brendan has caught up with Jack and is reminding him about his debt. Jack reminds Brendan that this is his workplace and he doesn't need reminding that he owes the money. He will pay it back when he has it. "Meanwhile I have to dance to your tune?" says Scott coldly. "Well I warn you I'm a very poor dancer!" "Hope you're good at whistling son," says Jack under his breath, "'Cos that's what you'll be doing!"

Across the room Mavis and Derek are have lunch. He does not understand how his jogging embarrassed her. She tells him several customers saw his performance and lost no time in telling her. He is amused when he hears that one witness described him as a lemon dash. "You've no shame have you?" Derek tells her he is sure she has enough shame for both of them. Mavis apologizes for calling attention to his weight but Derek tells her he is grateful. After all they might do some walking and it wouldn't do to be unprepared and Kinder Scout can be very testing on the legs. Mavis says she's always wanted to go up Kinder Scout. Derek points out that she's not exactly in "peak" condition herself. (Derek is making a little joke here. Kinder Scout is located in the Peak District of Derbyshire. However it is not actually much of a peak in height or topography. It is really an undulating moor which rises to 636m and because of the nature of the ground the actual peak is difficult to ascertain.)

At the bar Raquel is serving Steve and Andy comes and joins him. He tells Steve he now has a job at Bettabuys. "Hm, Curly must be desperate." "Mr. Watts if you don't mind!" says Andy.

At the bar Don is telling Jack about the roaring trade going on at the Queens. Liz is putting on all sorts of entertainment including a talent show. "Go on! That went out with the ark" scoffs Jack. He is slightly more impressed when Don tells him the prize money is fifty quid. Colin appears and orders a pints off Jack. He is noticed by Andy who tells Steve that was the bloke slobbering over his mother. (Strangely he does not say our mother) Steve tells him the bloke is Des' brother. At the bar Don and Jack are mutually dismissing the idea of the talent contest. Colin asks what they're talking about and tells them it's on Friday night. Jack asks him how he knows that. "I'm on the pay-roll at the Queens. A good pint and a cracking landlady. Here's to her." As Colin raises his glass to his employer Andy comes over and the usual scene takes place of the type that ensues when one fellow is under the impression that another fellow has slighted in some way the good name or reputation of the first fellow's girlfriend, wife, mother, granny, SO or other member of the fair sex with whom he may or may not have the least tenuous relationship. There is much posturing on the part of Andy and bewilderment on the part of Colin after which the parties retired to their respective corners of the bar to let what little dust was raised settle. No blood was drawn. Jack and Don fill Colin in on the relationship of his assailant to his employer. Derek and Mavis look on disapprovingly. Colin is mystified. "Will somebody tell me what I said?"

Afternoon in the Kabin and Rita has heard all about Derek's remarks at lunchtime and then some. Mavis is incensed at Derek's attack on her physical fitness. This is a classic Rita and Mavis exchange. Mavis is wittering on and Rita chips in with her two penn'orths which only wind Mavis up more. The crescendo reaches its climax when Mavis declares that Derek can't even stir his tea without huffing and puffing. Des enters and can't resist mentioning Derek's morning jog. Mavis answers that she does not want to talk about Derek. "Oh you saw the track suit as well?" (Rita swipes at Des) Mavis tells Des she's quite happy to talk about his brother the brawler. Rita explains this remark to Des and tells him that by all accounts it was not Colin's fault. Des is interested to hear that Colin is working at the Queens and he leaves quickly. Mavis is pleased that her information has disconcerted Des. "Shouldn't you be saving this for your Derek?" asks Rita. "Or are you just practising?"

Early afternoon and Audrey and Alf are still minding the kids. Alf suggests that they see if Sally is back. Audrey tells him that would be like dumping the kids. What else do they have to do anyway. She changes her tune when Alf suggests he could take her to Lytham.

Don calls round to see Jack and tell him that he's managed to get Friday off so they can go to the talent contest. Jack is hesitant he will need some dosh to oil his tonsils before he sings. Vera comes in from the back yard and Jack motions Don to say nowt. Don makes out he came to tell Jack a horse won. Vera tells him Jack's betting days are over. "Oh I don't know," says Don the lad's branching out." He departs singing "Fly me to the moon . . " Vera is mystified. Jack is busy sniffing Tommy's backside. He hands her the baby and tells her he wants his best shirt ironed for Friday.

At Bettabuys, Curly's plan to search staff bags is running into trouble. He is asking permission to search but is meeting resistance from Amy Nelson. Maureen wants to know what's going on but is told that this does not concern her. "Because she's marrying the area manager," says Amy. "It wouldn't do to concern her." Maureen is concerned. She thinks the plan to search staff is illegal. "Only if I don't get permission," says Curly. Amy tells him she's not giving permission. If he thinks she's stolen something he can call the police. Elaine is looking on amused. "Well so much for your bright ideas Miss Fenwick," snaps Curly. "From now on we'll do things my way."

At Lytham St. Annes Audrey and Alf are walking up the driveway of a bungalow. "It's Paradise Alf. We've just got to have it." Audrey is cooing with delight and admiring the flowers. Mr.Radcliffe the estate agent greets them and they enter Paradise.

At the Kabin Rita is sending Mavis home for an hour's rest. It seems that a constant stream of customers remarking on the exploits of the Yellow Peril have got to Mavis and consequently to Rita. As Mavis leaves Don arrives. He mentions Derek's jogging to Rita. Don wonders if he will catch the act tomorrow. Rita is doubtful. Derek's obsessions don't last long.

Or do they? When Mavis arrives home, Derek springs to the doorway and insists she close her eyes. It's a surprise! It's a rowing machine! - It's for Mavis! "Nip upstairs and get your tracksuit on," says Derek "and I'll show you how it works." Mavis is speechless but not with delight.

All is not well in Paradise. Alf is finding fault with everything. Not enough power points in the third bedroom. "There is room for another if you need it," counters the agent. "More expense," returns Alf and "I'm not happy with the position of these radiators." He then picks on the kitchen. There is no shelf in the beautiful custom kitchen which will accommodate a 500g box of cornflakes which as everyone knows is 12.5 inches high. Audrey is embarrassed by his attitude. "He used to be a grocer," she explains to the frustrated realtor.

In the Rovers Des is appeasing Andy. "Your mother wouldn't look twice at a mug like our Colin." Des tells Andy Colin should be on his way soon. "He can't stop anywhere long, he wears out his welcome." Rita has been telling Emily about Mavis' upsetting day and the rowing machine. "She was spitting feathers," says Rita. Brendan Scott is hanging on the edge of this conversation. He is trying to tell Emily about his voucher scheme. Rita says that it sounds like a lot of bother. "Oh, have you never gone in for inducement techniques?" say BS. Rita replies, "Oh no, I didn't know what a loss leader was until I met Reg Holdsworth." A fleeting look crosses Brendan's face as if he is not quite sure of Rita's double entendre but he decides to play it straight and after a historical note on promotional inducements and a tribute to Alf has being a very fine grocer - in his day - he drops the news that Sally told him Alf and Audrey are househunting and were this very minute in Lytham looking at a bungalow. Rita is impressed at his intelligence skills. "What else did Sally say?"

At said bungalow the Roberts are leaving. Audrey is incensed at Alf's attitude. "How could you do that? I had my heart set on that bungalow!" she wails as they get into the car. Alf decides to drive along the seafront but Audrey just wants to go home. "You'd no intention of viewing that house properly." Alf suggests they find a B&B and then they'll be on hand to make an offer. Audrey is incredulous. "You mean you liked it?" "I loved it," said Alf "and if we can get it at the right price it's Lytham here we come!"

Libby Seekings

First Appearance of Amy Nelson LOUISE DUPREY Brendan Scott MILTON JOHNS Colin Barnes IAN EMBLETON Elaine Fenwick PIPPA HINCHLEY Tommy Duckworth DARRYL EDWARDS George Radcliffe TIM LAMBERT
Written by TOM ELLIOTT Directed by CHARLES LAUDER

Wednesday (3573, Wednesday 28 July 1993)

Derek and Mavis discuss their day's plans over breakfast. Mavis asks if he will move the rowing machine into the spare bedroom. A lightbulb clicks on over Derek's head as he talks about the space in that room and all the keep fit equipment there is for home use. With one look, Mavis puts that light out - lol!

In Curly's office, Miss Fenwick is watching the security cameras and suggests larger surveillance signs be put up in the store. Curly wonders how the staff would take that as the random search idea has not gone over well. Miss Fenwick says they have nothing to fear if they have nothing to hide. Curly is not convinced this is the way to go. He says alienating the staff is bad business. Miss Fenwick perks up when she sees a suspicious character on the monitor but it ends up being the store detective, Mrs. Bridge.

Out at a bowling match in Lytham, Audrey and Alf discuss how their new life seems all right. Everything seems to be falling into place. Alf says he is looking forward to settling into the bungalow and having the time to enjoy their new interests, home and folk. He tells Audrey that he'll be just as disappointed as she if they don't get the house. The two cuddle and look very happy together.

Jack is drying the dishes as Vera and Tommy enter the kitchen. Vera tells him she knows he is up to summat as he has washed and dried the breakfast pots. He replies that he wanted to and has been thinking that Vera looks a bit tired and he wanted to help out. Vera says she is grateful and puts Tommy's jacket on. As they turn to go, Jack brings up the talent night and asks for a tenner. Vera rips into him, calling him a louse for the phoney "do-my-bit" act and tells him no way. Jack says there is 50 quid to be won. It's a sure thing, an investment and she tells him to look elsewhere for takers. She leaves with "come on Tommy love, before he has the vest off your back."

At the Kabin, Raquel is telling Mavis and Rita that short spurts are no good - you have to be regular. (she's talking exercise, people!;-) ) She goes on about the benefits -keeps you body supple, sharpens your mind - and she knows these things from the circles she mixes in. Rita asks "the Rovers?" Raquel says "with top sportsmen". Mavis says that Derek's not in that league yet but is beginning to feel the benefit of the exercise. Raquel says "oh lucky you" and brings out the other benefit "fit in body, fit in mind, fit in bed". Mavis looks affronted and Rita giggles away to herself. Raquel leaves telling Mavis to encourage Derek to continue as exercise is "well worth it, you've just got to look at me." Mavis says that Derek is just trying to lose a bit off his tummy and if she thought he would end like Raquel, she'd drag the machine to the tip herself! Rita counters with " If you Derek could end up like her, it'd be a flaming miracle!"

At Bettabuys, Andy's bagging at Amy's till. He wants to talk to her but she is not inclined. Miss Fenwick comes up and tells him to get to the bakery. He says he thought he'd go for his break but she insists bakery - NOW!

(big smile alert here!) Derek walks into the house from their garden and heads upstairs. As he goes, he notices the rowing machine is still downstairs. He gives a little giggle and approaches it. He sits down and tries it out while singing "row, row, row your boat" and grinning away.

Jack serves Don a drink at the Rovers and they discuss the talent night at the Queens. Don tells him he'll need audience reaction to win. Angie walks in as Jack realizes he'll need people he knows to be there. He asks if she and a few of her mates would go and cheer him on. She turns him down.

Mavis comes home to find Derek in pain. He's put his back out on the rowing machine!

Again, Andy is at Amy's till but this time is waiting for her break to come up as he is on his. Curly comes up and asks if Andy would wait in the canteen as as hanging around presents a bad image to the customer. By the time, he has finished telling him this, Amy has gone on break so Andy says fine and goes after her. He catches up to her and says they need to talk. She tells him that she has a date to shop with her friend, Paula and she'll see him later.

Derek in now on the floor atop the sofa cushions as Mavis is ringing the doctor. She goes to make lunch and tells him to stay there. "I'm not likely to be going anywhere, am I?"

Denise is at the Rovers and becomes Jack's second attempt at audience support. She say no and in walks contestant #3, Alma. Jack begins his "you're just the woman i wanted to see" speech again.

Steve buys a packet of mints from Rita. She asks after Jim and learns that he will be returning next week. She says his grandmother must have been bad as Jim has spent a lot of time over there. Steve replies "well, he's not got a lot to come back for, has he, really". Don comes in for his paper as Steve leaves. He asks Rita if she thinks Jim will come back with all that is going on. She tells him that Jim is and then wonders how Liz and he, with all that they have been through, can turn their backs on it all. Don simply says that not everybody sees life as Rita does.

The I-turned-Jack-down table at the Rovers is getting full! Alma, Denise and Angie have a giggle over it. The talk then turns to wishes of really having something to do on Friday night. Angie says they should have a girls' night out. Jack's talent night might be a laugh and she's game if the other two are. The three look at each other and Denise asks Jack what the starting time is for the show. - insert image of Jack doing his road runner impression to get to their table :-))

Derek is still on the cushions and Mavis is preparing to go back to the Kabin. The doctor has been and said that Derek might be like this for a week. Derek's is a common thing he sees with people who take a sudden interest in exercise. Derek whines to Mavis about her leaving him as he might need something and that she thinks it is his own fault. She tells him she has sympathy for him as she can see he is in pain but he can't expect her to stop at home for a whole week to be on hand 24 hours a day to mollycoddle him. She says she will try to get back to check on him and gives him a peck on the forehead on her way out.

(Vera really looked washed out in this scene) Vera is ironing and tells Jack she expected him an hour ago. Has he been to the betting shop? He says he was at the Rovers as they need all the overtime they can get now. She apologizes and tells him how she's had to put back items on the shelf as she couldn't afford them. Jack says he knows and that's why he's been on about the 50 quid. "Don't start that again." He tells her he knows he has it wrapped up now as he'll have support in the crowd. He says to ask Don if she doesn't believe him. "It's a tenner, that's all - you'll get it back with interest, I promise you." Jack then pulls out the big guns and tells V to think of all the things she could get for Tommy. Not quite convinced, she protests but Jack says it would be like taking a tenner from his own grandson and would he do that if he didn't think he'd get it back? Vera gives a little smile and the walls of protest seem to crumble.

Audrey walks into the Kabin and she and Rita go into the back for a cuppa and a natter. Rita asks if this is really what they want - to move away from family and friends. Audrey says it's not like it's the other side of the world. "No, but it's far enough away if one of you gets left on your own", says Rita. Then she says, she didn't mean to put a downer on it, she wishes them well. She was just thinking of her own situation and how she'd be fixed if she had moved to Florida when Ted wanted to. Audrey says yes but that was a different set of circumstances and this will give Alf a new lease on life.

Raquel serves Steve and he heads to sit with Andy is in a foul mood. After Andy basically tells him to shove off, Steve says "it's her, isn't it?" and asks if Amy has given Andy the elbow. Andy says no but won't say any more on it. Steve then tells him about an old school mate who is married with a kid on the way. "Who wants to be lumbered with a kid at our age?" Andy just looks at him. Don walks in and Jack says "friday night". Don says no he won't lend him the money but Jack says he got it from Vera and does an impromptu little dance.

At the Roberts' abode, Alf is on the phone when Audrey comes in. He tells her they have a couple coming on Friday to have a look at their house and that their offer on the bungalow has been accepted. Alf chuckles as Audrey realizes that their dreams may be coming true!

Judith Cooper

Written by BARRY HILL Directed by CHARLES LAUDER

Thursday (3574, Friday 30 July 1993)

Morning at the Wilton's. Derek is still suffering from his run-in with the rowing machine. He whines his way to the breakfast table likening the pain to a hot wire being thrust through his vital organs. Mavis presents him with bread soldiers (for his soft-boiled egg) and his anti-inflammatory pills. He sternly tells Mavis not to overcook his egg or he won't be able to dip the bread in it (poor baby). He reads the label on his pills. It says to take 1 tablet 4 times a day after meals. He moans that he now has to eat an extra meal to accommodate the medication. Mavis sympathetically (not) says he's supposed to be losing weight not gaining it! Derek lays the blame for all his pain and suffering at Mave's doorstep. If she had said he was getting fat he wouldn't have bought the rowing machine (wasn't it supposed to be for Mavis' use?) he wouldn't have used the rowing machine and therefore wouldn't be suffering now! Mavis tries to say something but is cut off by Derek, all 'her' arguing means she hasn't been watching his brekkie and now his egg's overcooked!

At Grassmere Drive Audrey is in a cleaning frenzy while Alf sits and reads the paper. Audrey removes the paper from Alf and hands him a pair of his dressy shoes. She tells him to take off his slippers and put the shoes on because if the people coming to see the house see him in his slippers they will think he's a slacker. And nobody would want to buy a house from a slacker! Alf replies if the people really like the house then it won't matter what he's wearing. He adds that he read somewhere that house buyers respond well to a house that smells like fresh baked bread. Audrey says tough, she's not making bread and anyway, she'd heard it was vases and vases of fresh cut flowers that were the key to house sale success. She makes a deal with Alf he runs out and buys dozens of flowers; she'll make a loaf of bread. Looks like the Roberts' shall remain breadless and flowerless.

In the Kabin Raquel is staring vacantly into space - we are meant to believe she is thinking really hard. She can't decide what to do with her day off. Mavis says she'd go into Manchester and look around the art galleries. Raquel doesn't think that's for her. Mavis offers up another suggestion, how about a browse through the public library (Mavis Wilton - party girl!). 'A browse' says Raquel 'isn't that what cows do?'

Rita was on the phone while Raquel & Mave were discussing days out. It was Derek, he has some 'deep heat' cream to apply and he can't reach the affected areas. He wants Mavis to nip home and help him out.

Raquel is happy to share her 'deep heat' cream knowledge 'oh yeah, Transvestite its called, its ever so good.'

Mavis complains that she applied Derek's cream last night and he reckoned she did it all wrong. She's just not good at massaging people she says. Raquel says that's OK because she is. She had lots of practice on Wayne (ex-boyfriend the footballer) because he was always suffering from 'muscular injuries'. She offers to massage Derek. Mavis says no. Raquel offers again. Mavis declines. Raquel insists. Rita insists. Mavis is grudgingly accepts.

At Bettabuys Elaine is watching for shoplifters on the CCTV. Curly walks in and she points out a suspect to him. Oh no, says Curly, can't be, I know her but the TV clearly shows Vera stuffing some items behind Tommy in his stroller.

At the Wilton's Derek is lying on the floor in rapt contentment while Raquel works wonders on his back with the 'Transvestite'. Mavis offers to take over from Raquel but Derek says 'no Mavis just watch her technique'. Mave fumes.

In front of the tills at Bettabuys Elaine and Curly argue over what to do next about Vera. Elaine decides she'll notify security to stop Vera once she heads through the checkout. Curly intercepts Vera at the till. He looks at her carry basket, is that all you're shopping for today he asks. Vera says that yes it is. Curly bends down to say hello to Tommy. He picks him up out of the stroller while Vera protests. Curly looks down and sees the 4 items that were stuffed behind Tommy. (One looked like a tin of spaghetti hoops, jeez Vera, at least swipe the expensive stuff!). Curly says he thinks they need to chat in his office while Elaine glares at him for spoiling her sting operation.

Up in Curly's office Vera is discussing things with them in her usual calm, reserved manner. She's shrieking like a bag of cats. She's shocked and appalled that Curly is accusing her of being a thief. She plays the 'after-all-I've-done-for-you' card. Curly looks guilty while Elaine rolls her eyes at the pathetic display of theatrics. Vera admits she did put some things in the stroller but only because the carry baskets are too small and she can't be expected to use the big carts and push Tommy's stroller. Of course she meant to pay for everything. Curly looks like he's relenting but says he's got his job to do. 'I was beginning to think you'd forgotten that' snipes Elaine.

Back at the Wilton's Derek is purring away while Raquel continues to rub his back. Mavis tries, repeatedly, to get Raquel off Derek and out of their house. Derek protests, he's finally getting some relief. He continues to irritate Mave by telling Raquel she has 'amazing hands'. Mavis tries to get rid of Raquel again. Raquel says she doesn't have anything else to do and she 'gets a lot of satisfaction out of helping people when they are suffering'. More grunts of approval from Derek. Mavis ditches the subtle approach and tells Raquel she really DOES have to be going and physically plucks her off Derek and hustles her out the door.

Back in Curly's office Elaine is about to call the police. She tells Vera she can make things easier on herself if she'd just own up. Curly intervenes and says, this time, there is no need to involve the police. Vera shows her gratitude by screeching she will never shop at Bettabuys again (cheers all around). Curly tells her he thinks, upon reflection, she'll find she brought the matter on herself. Vera tells them both to 'get knotted' and storms out.

Elaine turns on Curly and accuses him of ignoring head office procedure for dealing with shoplifters because Vera is his neighbour. Curly defends his actions but not very effectively. Elaine says he's a disgrace and wonders what Head Office will think. She makes sure to slam the door on her way out.

At the Duckie's nest Jack is tarting himself up for his appearance at the talent night at the Queens (pink shirt, red tie, blue suspenders, grey jacket and purple hanky in the pocket!). He notices Vera is quiet and asks her what's wrong. She tells him about the episode at Bettabuys making sure to paint herself as the victim. Jack asks if she's sure she's not going to get 'done' for shoplifting. She says she won't. Jack says Curly wouldn't have a go at her for nothing and asks her straight out if she's been stealing. Vera starts to cry; she really doesn't know what's happened. (Poor Vera really did seem genuinely confused and scared by now).

Across the street Mavis and Derek are entertaining Alf and Audrey. Mavis has cracked open the sherry - party time! Alf inquires about Derek's back. Derek says he needs an intensive course of massage and he knows where he can get it too! So does Mavis, she will ring about physiotherapy first thing in the morning. Alf comments how he will be spending all his time at the bowls club when they move to Lytham. Mave coos over how idyllic it all sounds. Cut to Audrey, she's looking for a straw for the sherry bottle and comments how Alfie will be 'youngblood' at the club given the aged state of most of the members.

At the Queens, Jack is getting the drinks in for his cheering squad. He has brought along Don, Denise, Alma and Angie. Denise & Alma complain that he's bought them a small gin each and a tonic to share, is this the thanks they get for coming along to cheer & clap? Jack says they're his mates, he shouldn't have to bribe them!

Colin steps up on the makeshift stage and welcomes them all to Talent Night at the Queens. First up Billy Nuttall. He launches into his number but Jack dismisses him as rubbish - just wait till they hear him!

At the Duckworth's Vera is trying to settle a not very fussy Tommy. She feels bad about not being able to get him any gripe water. She cuddles him and says it will all be OK.

Next up at the Queens a dude in a kilt crooning about Scotland. He's really bad (my cat had his paws over his ears). Amy and Andy are at a table in the corner they both agree that they could have handled the 'Amy being a Mom' situation better. Andy assures her he still wants to be with her. Kiltman finishes - Jack's verdict - also rubbish!

Liz trots over to Jack's table (how does she do that in those stilettos?) to tell him it's his turn. He is introduced as "Jackie Duckworth Jr." and breaks into his version of 'The Lady is a Tramp'. Meanwhile back at the table Liz laments to the others how bad the acts were tonight; she convinces Denise & Angie to have a go.

Back at the Duckie's Vera's mood is deteriorating fast. Tommy sits on her lap while she tells him how people always treat Duckworths like dirt. She sniffs and promises Tommy it will be better for him when his Dad 'gets out'.

Jack finishes his tune and gets a decent round of applause. He comes back to the table and Alma assures him he was 'something else'. (He wasn't great but he was the best of the three shown). Denise & Angie get ready for their song while Jack dismisses them, he's positive the £350 is his!

Denise & Angie performing as "The Soap Sisters" launch into 'Fever' and they're really, really good. Don tells Jack he can say goodbye to the £350!

Curly knocks on the Duckie's door. Vera tells him to clear off. Curly says he really needs to talk to her. He explains how he put his job on the line for her this afternoon and Miss. Fenwick will take a lot of pleasure dropping him in it. Vera is still indignant. Curly says, rightly or wrongly, Miss. Fenwick spotted her as a potential shoplifter. Had she gone through the tills without paying for the things in Tommy's stroller she would have been stopped by security and the police called in. He intercepted her as a favour to her. She's still indignant (ungrateful cow!) and says she was going to pay and didn't ask Curly for his help. With that last verbal smack in the face Curly turns to go but he adds he knows it must be hard and offers her a loan. This is all too much for Vera who shouts she doesn't need his charity and turfs him out.

Final scene: Close up of Vera looking very worried and more than a bit guilty.

Tammy Mitchell

Pianist: BRIAN FITZGERALD Billy Nuttall: JACKIE RICHMOND Bruce McDuff: ROD MACKINNON
Written by: JOHN STEVENSON Directed by: CHARLES LAUDER

Friday (3575, Monday 2 August 1993)

The fallout from Vera's near brush with the law continues today, starting in the Kabin this morning as Jack gives Curly the full meal deal of guilt. You know, "after all we've done for you" and "how chuffed Vera was when you made management", that sort of thing. Curly tries to defend his actions as having no choice but Jack just gives him a last look of disappointment and leaves. Curly, flushed with humiliation, pays for his newspaper with a snarl. Andy and Colin pass in the shop with Andy firing an underhanded comment in Colin's general direction. Colin takes note but enters in a conversation with the Dynamic Duo behind the counter. Mavis, being Mavis, manages to insult Des to his brother and are we surprised when Colin good naturedly shoots back a retaliation before leaving, must to Mavis' consternation and Rita's delight. Well you WOULD insult his brother! Now what was that comment about that Andy made? Mavis didn't even notice, to Rita's frustrated curiosity.

Over in the café, Mike is talking to Alma about private school for Mark. Percy, looking rather natty in his snappy regimental blazer, is sitting very nearby reading his newsprint "Cage and Aviary" and adding his two pence whenever he feels it necessary. Alma and Gail don't think too highly of private school but Mike's all for it. Gail thinks there's plenty of dodgey schools too though Mike wonders if Eton would agree. That sparks his imagination and he's off, picturing his son in the old school tie. Alma and Gail are stymied! Why not, Mike blusters, so it's expensive, it isn't a charity after all! Percy interjects calmly and corrects Mike, it is in face a registered charity. All the better, Mike boasts. Clever accountants! He decides to call directory assistance for the phone number for Eton college and while he's doing it, Percy muses about the founder of Eton college, one of the Henrys, the one that went a bit mad (Henry VI, I looked it up, and King's College too as it happens). Mike asks what town Eton is in, in response to the operator's question I imagine, and Percy smugly points out that he would know that if he had had a decent education. (Windsor).

Over to Bettabuys, Andy makes arrangements for Amy to come over so he can cook her one of his student specials (cheap, no meat, veggie stew from the sounds of it). Curly, who's mood hasn't got any better, hollers at Andy to get back to work and stalks away, only to be encountered by Ms. Rule Book Fenwick who immediately starts narking Curly about the shoplifting incident over which Curly avoided the proscribed Bettabuys rules. She's even called Mr. Holdsworth about the transgression. Oh mannnnnn! Geez she's as bad as Anne Malone will become in the future, this one. And it gets worse! Later on she finds the surveillance tape on Curly's desk and confiscates it, putting it in an envelope. When Curly discovers it's absence he summons her and she admits to taking it and wanting to keep it in a safe place. She's sent it to Reg!!!!

Back to the café, Mike is discussing fees with the registrar at Eton. Sounds like the only way Mark could get in is by either a scholarship or at the end of a long waiting list. While Mike talks to Eton, Gail succumbs to a brilliantly evil impulse and hollers out "Sausage, tomatoes, Eggs and two teas!!!" while Mike scrambles to cover the phone and maintain his dignity. LOL! Gail and Alma giggle like two naughty schoolgirls behind him!

Back to the Kabin again, Raquel tells Mavis that she has another potion for Derek. Mavis, quick to block any access to her Derek's body parts, assures her he's improving. . Angie brings a great armload of magazines to the till. Raquel assumes she's bought them to pamper herself or to make herself feel better. Angie says it's just for design stealing ideas and decided to treat herself as she's flush today. Raquel is away but Angie tells Mavis and Rita that she and Denise won the 50 quid in the talent contest last night when they were only supposed to go and cheer on Jack. Ah but she's soon brought down to earth when Rita tells her about Vera's incident, and Angie realizes she was drinking Vera's housekeeping money when Jack was buying rounds, hoping to pay it back with his winnings. Her face falls and she takes off like a shot to the salon where Don is putting up a fixture for Denise. She proceeds to tell Denise the story (off camera)

Bouncing back to the café, Mike has stunned Gail and Alma with the tuition fee to Eton, over 3000 quid a term, that's 12,000 a year!!!! Alma gasps, and there's a blazer to buy on top of all that! Percy's turn again, you see, Etonians wear a special Eton suit with stand up white collars. Alma wonders how Percy knows so much! Percy smugly points out that it was General knowledge in his day, now it's General Ignorance! Mike agrees with Percy for once, making a point to his views on the need for an education. Well at them prices, you can tell, Alma thinks Mark will be stopping at Weatherfield comp!

Ooh, change of scenery. We're over at the Queens now (did you know the actual official name on the front of the Queens is the Queens Arms?) Liz comes through with an armful of bottles. Colin watches her come toward him, his both arms stretched out toward her as if he's not going to grab just the bottles from her chest. But that is just what he does, grab two bottles, that is, all the while gazing into her eyes. He asks if he's interpreted the situation right, her lads don't have much time for him. That's lads for you, Liz dismisses. But Colin figures they're upset that his mother might have other men that might fancy her. Liz thinks it's more that they're jealous that she might fancy other men. They'll have to get used to it, Colin purrs. Judging from the body language, they've both just taken a step into that age old dance. Liz blushes and simpers, Colin looks her in the eye with a flirtatious grin.

Maureen is in the Kabin now, chatting with Mavis about her house hunting quest. Mavis mentions Rita's (Ted's) house though it has two stories. Still it's in a nice area. Raquel drops in with the liniment for Derek. Mavis flusters, thinking Raquel wants to rub it on personally but she doesn't. Maureen wonders if the liniment might not help Reg, in case they hadn't notice, Maureen starts, he does have a bit of a twitch in his neck. (Neck???? By Eck! His whole body vibrates most of the time. Me dad says "Must be jelly cause jam don't shake like that". Of course he isn't usually talking about a tremor when he uses that expression)

Denise is the designated spokesperson and she awkwardly broaches the subject of the 50 quid contest winnings to Vera. She explains that she and Angie were only in it due to the drinks Jack bought and he really should have won. So she and Angie decided that Vera ought to get the winnings as she would have had if Jack had indeed won. Vera doesn't want to take charity and knows why Denise is doing this. You think we're on our uppers don't yer? Well you are, Denise says but it really should have been yours. Vera refuses and then twigs that Denise has heard the shoplifting stories. She calmly trots out the party line, that one about not being able to carry everything so she put some things in the buggy. Denise makes a hash out of trying to explain that she believes Vera, finding all the wrong words, only succeeding in alienating Vera to the point where she finds herself on the receiving end of Vera's sharp tongue and tossed out, with the money thrown back in her face. After the door closes, Vera breaks down again, from the humiliation.

Down at Number 11, Andy is throwing his student special together as Amy watches and Steve takes the piss. As Andy and Amy cuddle, Steve picks up the ringing phone. From the conversation we can glean that it's Jim. Gran is much better and he's coming home tomorrow. Andy sends his best to his grandmother.

In the Queens, Colin watches Liz with his dark smoldering eyes lowered in appreciation. (Oh my, is it getting warmer in here????) A customer comes to the bar with a half glass of cloudy ale and a complaint. Colin pulls a fresh pint and corrects the man's assumption that Liz is his wife. He's just the hired help, he says, knowing Liz is listening, but he glances over his shoulder, giving Liz a look that makes her blush and look away, and comments, He's working on it! Liz gently scolds Colin, the number one rule, "Don't send up the landlady". Colin reckons he's in trouble. Liz, body language speaking volumes, admonishes him with a tilt of her head and a point of her finger, she shouldn't have taken him on. He lays it out (don't I wish) He wasn't desperate for a pub job after all. Maybe he shouldn't have applied? He suggests suggestively. She, tellingly, doesn't reply to this but again, drops her eyes away from his intense gaze and softly lowered voice. He pushes it just a little further, "Quick on the update, your lads" meaning the lads know he fancies Liz, before backing off and going to fix one of the barrels. She watches him go with one of those looks that you do along with the though. .. MOP! Er. . . "What am I getting myself in for?"

In the pub, Reg and Maureen are discussing Rita's house and the possibilities of converting the lower floor for Maud and the upper for a flat for themselves. Mike and Alma are still chatting about Eton but Mike admits it won't likely happen. Still, there are some schools out there that are more reasonable even if Eton is only a dream. Alma is concerned about the cost. Reg gets up and goes to the bar, only to be approached by Curly about the shoplifting rule buster, Miss Fenwick. Reg tries to avoid the subject but Curly won't let it go. Reg would rather talk about home and hearth not business. Curly pushes, defending his actions with Vera's shoplifting incident, as a page out of Reg's school of management "timely intervention is the A to Z of management". But Reg gets huffy having his words thrown back in his face and threatens to throw the book at poor Curly. Damn. Shot down.

Diane Johnston

Pub Customer ANTHONY WINGATE Amy Nelson LOUISE DUPREY
Written by JULIAN ROACH Directed by ROMEY ALLISON


Originally transmitted: 4, 6, 9, 11 & 13 August 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 24 - Friday 30 June 2000
Episode Numbers: 3576 - 3580

Monday (3576, Wednesday 4 August 1993)

Jim appears, with two blue bags, from behind an orange and white bus, at his back a graffiti-marked, boarded up window. As he passes a phone booth, we realise that he's at the corner of Coronation Street - the wanderer has returned from over the Irish Sea. (And when did they replace the red phone box, I'm wondering?) At No. 11, a topless, and skinny Steve is hurrying about, dressing between snatches of breakfast, as the radio plays a pop song, (dunno what it was though, sorry) in a very messy house. It's obvious there's no Mum around to keep order. As he opens the door to leave, he's startled to find his Dad at the doorstep, wondering why he can't get in. (I'm sure Andy told him about that on the phone, didn't he?) Steve mumbles about the robbery and the changing of the locks, and Jim enters, dropping his bags to add to the clutter. He asks if Andy is about, but Andy's gone to work Steve tells him, which is where he has to be, obviously uncomfortable and anxious to go, but Jim says surely he can spare a couple of minutes to let his Dad know what's been happening. Steve tells him that they're missing a TV and video, and a couple of other bits and pieces, and Jim asks if Liz knows he's back. "Andy warned her, yes," Steve replies, and with "I'll see you," turns to go, still angry with his Dad. When Jim asks him if he's going to leave the radio on, Steve says yes, as it makes it sound as if there's someone about the place. He hasn't even bothered to cut Jim an extra set of keys, and is reluctant to give Jim his in the meantime, but finally tosses them into Jim's hands and slams out. "Welcome home, Daddy-o," says Jim to himself.

Perusing the shelves at Bettabuys is Derek, shopping list in hand, trolley before him, and a cheery Reg strides by with a "Good morning," but Derek pays little heed, until a pair of rambunctious youngsters, pushing a trolley with another kid inside it, ram his. In the background, Reg is pointing after them, speaking to Maureen, and you can just imagine him: "Did you see that? Eh! Eh! What are today's children coming to, that's what I'd like to know!" Derek is incensed, and calls after the kids, but immediately Elaine Fenwick is before him, asking if all is well - of course it isn't, and off she goes to see to them, as Curly arrives on the scene, asking if there's a problem. Kids, running riot, and they'll lose half their stock if they don't watch out, says Derek. Elaine is full of apologies, saying they're keeping a special eye on things during the holidays, and not only the children, aren't we, Mr. Watts, she adds meaningfully - a dig at Curly's predicament with Vera's foray into shoplifting. When Curly offers to go after them, she says she will, as she knows the correct procedure, and how to follow through. Oh, put away your knife Miss Fenwick! Curly tells Derek to come to him if there are any more problems, and as he leaves, Derek grabs himself from a jab of back pain. Meanwhile, Maureen is laying down the law to Reg about the appointment she's made with Rita to see Ted Sullivan's house. "We're not married yet, you know," Reg says as he toddles off to follow orders. She yells that she's starting to wonder if they ever will be, as Curly passes him, and wonders to Curly, how Reg, as such an organised man, can be so disorganised over the house issue. "When it suits him," Curly opines. When Maureen explains how she found out about the Sullivan house, and wonders why Reg didn't mention it, Curly accidentally on purpose lest slip about Reg's courtship of Rita, before she married Ted Sullivan. After dropping the bombshell, he rushes off to take care of some urgent business, leaving Maureen muttering, "Rita, and Reg?" with a frown on her face.

Liz, still in her robe in the Queen's Arms living quarters, hears someone at the door, and Colin waltzes in, cocky as ever. Liz is surprised, as staff members don't usually show up so early, but Colin will show them. From her reaction, it appears that she might have been expecting Jim, but she rallies and offers Colin a cup of tea, while she makes herself presentable. "Who says you don't look presentable as you are?" he responds, and Liz replies that, "According to Bet Gilroy, the day doesn't start until you've got your eye shadow on, and she taught me everything I know." "Any tips on handling the staff," he asks. "One word - don't," Liz answers, and they exchange knowing smiles. Don't think she's going to follow Bet's advice with this one.

Curly gives Reg a bicky for his cup of tea, in Bettabuys' office, as they discuss theft, and Curly is quite upset at all the fuss over the incident with Vera, being made to look the bad guy, after all his hard work to get to his position. Reg counters that he should have thought of that before intervening before Vera got to the checkout, and he himself must remain impartial, or he'll be tarred with the same brush, "accused of favouritism and non-professional behaviour." "Accused, by whom?" asks Curly. "By Head Office, of course," Reg replies, dunking his bicky. When Curly wonders how far it's all going, Reg tells him that once the paperwork has started, even though Curly is his protégé, he's in the system now and Reg can't do anything for him. Curly is disgusted at this, and wants to go for a pint to discuss it further, but Reg won't have it, not least because Maureen has made the appointment to see the Sullivan house. Curly warns him that he won't get a good deal, as Rita was so stroppy when Curly wanted to buy his house. "Caveat emptor," responds Reg, "Buyer beware," but let it be vendor beware, in this case, he preens.

Cut to Rita and Mavis in the shop, Rita saying that if Reg is too slippery, as they know he'll try it on, she'll hang in for a better buyer. Mavis apologises for mentioning it to Maureen, but Rita isn't upset, as Mavis might have done her a favour, though Ted might be spinning in his grave! Jim enters, looking for the employment section of the Gazette, and Rita asks him, "Still no work?" No, but he hasn't been looking either, he tells her, which reminds Mavis to ask after his mother. Reassured that she is fine, Mavis witters on that that's good news, but now he's back here with no job, a nasty robbery, and all to face on his own. "That's it in a nutshell," Jim replies, but he's had time to think, not drink, and there's nothing like a crisis to make you realise a few things about yourself, and the only person who can sort out his mess is himself. Mavis thinks he has the right attitude, but Rita is dubious. Give the man a chance she tells Rita, he's trying to make a fresh start. "In my experience," Rita opines, "men who solve problems with their fists don't change, and only a fool thinks they can." Whether she's referring to Jim himself, Mavis, or her own life, is open to question.

At the café, the place is full of kids, and Gail comments that most mothers would dread their kids spending their school holidays there, but "their two" are at the slot machine. "Whose two?" Alma asks, and Gail yells at Nicky and Mark to leave the machine and find something better to do. "Like what?" Nicky asks her. Alma then begins to expound on her school holidays as a Beatle fan, earning money for her Beatles collection. "You collected beetles?" asks Nicky, in surprise. "No, THE Beatles," she replies, and proceeds to explain about ordering and waiting for LP's, etc., but in those days, all the songs had lyrics. "They had what?" asks Mark. "Who did you like, Gail," asks Alma. "Ooh, the Rolling Stones, Mick Jagger. Oh, he was so sexy, " Gail enthuses. "He still is," says Mark, and then Gail tells the boys that she still has all the Stones records and they can go and look through them if they'd like. "Nah, we'll take a pass on that'" says Nicky, and off the boys go, to Mark's house, in a hurry, while Alma and Gail slap hands. "What a team!" Gail rejoices. "And they thought they were bored when they came in," agrees Alma, as they laugh in conspiracy. Having to listen to the reminiscing of the old folks, is still the quickest way to bore the kids, it seems!

Chez Grimes/Naylor, Reg is trying to watch the Vera video, which he refused to watch when Curly was at his shoulder in Bettabuys, while Maureen and Maud natter on about the visit to the Sullivan house. When Maud asks how they found out about it, "It belongs to a friend of Reg's, doesn't it Reg?" Maureen answers, snarling at him. It seems that Maureen has had time to chew on Curly's tidbit regarding Rita and Reg, and it's given her indigestion. Hardly listening, Reg agrees, and goes back to the video, as Maud complains at having no warning, and of her day being thrown off kilter. "It seems to be a day of bombshells, Mother," Maureen says, teeth gritted, and Reg on his knees before her, all attention on the Telly. Maud moves her attention to the video that has Reg enthralled, and thinking that it's a crime show says, "She did it, whatever it was, plain as day-shifty looking woman if ever I saw one!" Maureen tells Reg to switch it off, as they don't want to keep RITA waiting, do they, and he stops the tape just as the taxi toots its horn outside. He pushes Maud's wheelchair out, telling her to speak up if there's anything she objects to, and they'll just keep on house-hunting. She asks him if there's any point in looking. "I'm dying to see what the selling point is," mutters Maureen, behind them

A rare scene, of a non-Corrie exterior, greet us, with Reg, Maureen, Maud and Rita on the pavement outside Ted's house, and a big black traditional British taxi beside them-lots of room! A sour-faced Maureen stands by as Maud and Rita get acquainted. "Apparently she's quite a catch, married twice, a dedicated woman with her own business," Maud says approvingly. "Must be her strength and independence they find so attractive, I suppose," she adds. As Rita leads the way, Maureen thinks that Reg will know his way already. Maud is surprised that Rita is a friend of Reg. "Still, a lovely woman like that tends to see good in everyone, I suppose," she says, oblivious to both Maureen and Reg's discomfort. When Reg says they're there to see what she has to offer, Maureen is quick to respond, "Those of us who don't already know," her teeth gritted, into Reg's face.

Leaning over the pumps at the Rovers', Jack, as usual, at her side, Raquel is chatting with Don and Denise about her proposed trip to France with Gordon. "I know 'Oui' is 'yes'," she tells them. Jack says that's all she'll need with the right Frenchman, and she reminds him that she's going with her boyfriend. "Je ne regrette rien," Denise says, rolling her "R's" with abandon, "is the only French I know and it's been useless as far as I've been concerned." "What's it mean?" asks Don. "I have no regrets," she answers, ironically. "With two marriages behind you, you must have one or two," responds Raquel, with her usual lack of tact, and trots over to Des, as Denise looks annoyed. "Bonjour, Desmond, 'ow may I 'elp yer?" she coos. My usual cocktail, Des grins back. "Une pint, or an 'alf," she asks, just as Jim greets Des. "You'd better make that deux pints, Raquel please," Des tells her. "What?" Raquel looks at him blankly. "TWO!" Jack tells her. "Oh! Right!" the penny drops. Des asks Jim about Ireland, and Jim thinks all is well, with the rest of his tribe there to take care of things, and it was time he got back and got his head together, "know what I mean?" Raquel pipes up that Colin has a job at the Queen's. Jim didn't know Des had a brother, but Des says, "He's just passing through, like." Raquel contradicts him, as her impression was it was a full-time job. "Temporarily, yes," counters the uncomfortable Des, who then excuses himself conveniently, to give Don some tips. Jim is very interested in Colin, and asks Raquel about him. Tactlessly true to form, she tells him that a girl on her own must have her wits about her, as he's just come off a ship, the Merchant Navy. As a steward, he'd be quite an asset to a fancy pub like the Queen's. "Mind you, Liz needs someone she can rely on to share the load," she concludes. "Of course she does," says Jim, embarrassed, and quaffs his pint thoughtfully.

Back at Ted's house, Maureen dashes out onto the patio in tears, closely followed by a concerned Reg. It soon becomes clear that Maureen is put out that Maud is getting on so well with Rita. Maud and Reg have found something in common at last, she tells him. "What is your problem," he asks her. "This is getting embarrassing!" You know what, you should have told me Reg, she replies, and finally the penny drops and the unctuous Reg reassures Maureen that, yes, Rita did pursue him (!!!) at one time, but did he show her any interest, or encourage her? Maureen mollified, they make up and go to look at the bedrooms.

A silent trio made up of Andy, Jim and Steve are eating lunch at No. 11, until Jim brings up Liz. "I hear Mum's still doing well for herself," he comments, with no ulterior motive, it's clear. With relief, Andy responds in agreement, but when Jim mentions the new hand, Steve jumps in with an angry "Well! That didn't take you long, did it?" Andy tells him to cool it, but Steve thinks that Jim is back only five minutes and "already trying to dig up the dirt." Steve still mistrusts Jim's motives, and jibes that he should go and throw his fists around, since he doesn't trust Liz. Jim asks for a break, as he's trying to put things right, and Steve hasn't given him the time of day since he got back, but Steve tells him that he's heard it all before, and storms off up the stairs. Andy follows trying to calm him down, but Steve will have none of it. His Dad still thinks Liz is sleeping around, and he wouldn't blame her if she did, he yells. Andy winces, and Jim rubs his eyes at the task before him. His vindication might be sooner than he thinks, as one son knows better already.

Reg arrives at the corner shop, and, as he obviously doesn't want to buy the house from Rita, it's not surprising that he maunders on about the fix-ups that will be necessary. Rita isn't expecting an offer though, and isn't put out, until he tells her that Maureen thinks the house has atmosphere, but they couldn't talk turkey unless it was for £10,000 less than her asking price! After all, they'll have to make alterations for Maud's wheelchair, which, Rita tells him, she has no need to consider, as the seller. When Reg brings up Ted's health situation, she's really annoyed, and he backs off, saying it's a lovely house, but not one that would interest them above the previously mentioned figure. Rita bitingly asks for time to think about it, and he tells her to take her time. It looks as if he's got his way, and under no consideration will she sell him the house. Reg exits, humming, as Rita watches him with lips tightly pursed in disgust.

It's afternoon, and the Queen's Arms pub is empty, and Tanya Pooley sits at her ease, while Liz wanders about aimlessly, wondering in jest, if it's something she said. "Make the most of it," Tanya tells her, as Colin sweeps in with a tray of three mugs of beverage held high in one hand, a la an experienced French waiter, quipping, "Don't say I never do anything for you!" "Ta," says Tanya, as he bypasses her outstretched hand and joins Liz. "You can stay," smiles Liz, in thanks for the cuppa. "I might just do that," is his comeback. "What, and give up your life on the High Seas?" asks Liz, while Tanya walks over to join them. He replies that it's not all it's cracked up to be, and Tanya jokes that if you've seen one tropical island, you've seen "em all! "The novelty soon wears off," he tells her, but, "My heart bleeds," she sarcastically responds. "Why travel the world when you can have all this?" she asks, as she gestures around her. It's true, Colin replies, but Tanya tells him to keep talking, and she might believe him by closing time, obviously thinking he's having her on. Colin is serious however, and is intending his comments for Liz, not Tanya, who seems oblivious to the fact that she's the fifth wheel in the conversation. He sadly says that "Coming home is the hard part-too many expectations." People imagine he's had this amazing time, but don't necessarily want to hear about it. "Somewhere along the line, we all get disappointed," he says. "I'll swap!" laughs Tanya, but Liz suggests he take a break while it's quiet. "Too early for in-depth talk, eh?" he asks. "Don't' worry, we weren't taking you seriously," replies Tanya. "No?" "No," she answers, "It's not the port that makes the difference, it's the girl." She removes herself, while Liz and Colin exchange another knowing look.

Back at the Rovers', meanwhile, Raquel is still expounding about her French holiday, this time to Mike, Don, and Percy. She's anxious to learn some French, so that she can communicate, and circumvent the standoffish behaviour of the French towards the Brits. "Where are you off to?" asks Percy, and she tells them that she's and Gordon are meeting up with friends, at 'Gite.' (She pronounces it correctly, though, saying 'zheet') More of a young person's thing, but very nice just the same, and where exactly, asks Percy. "Gite," she repeats. "Any gite in particular," asks Mike. "Oh, there's more than one?" "Hundred's of 'em. Where's this one of yours, then?" responds Don. "Well, this is THE Gite, in Normandy," replies Raquel. "Well, I suppose that narrows it down," Don says to Percy. "Normandy, in France, of course," Raquel answers, "and next you'll be telling me there's two of them," she says, as Don and Mike, no longer able to contain their mirth, snort with laughter. [I don't want to look like another Raquel here, but I wasn't familiar with the word, only assuming from the context that the word 'gite' meant some kind of cheap lodging, so I looked it up. The Collin's dictionary only said, "resting place, lair, shelter, home, bed, seam, or leg of beef!" so I went online and the SEVENTH online dictionary finally came up with the definition-all the others came up 'word not found.' It does mean lodgings, specifically, 'a simple, usually inexpensive, rural retreat, especially in France,' hence the men's amusement!] Percy ambles off to join Mavis at a table, and we see Reg counting the change Jack has just given him, in the background, much to Jack's annoyance: "IT'S ALL THERE!" he leans over the bar and says into Reg's face. He was just seeing if there was enough for a bag of crisps, he tells jack, and adds, "keep the change," as Jack passes over the crisps. Oh, dear me," mutters Jack, counting it himself. When Percy asks after Derek's health, Mavis tells him that Derek is a constant pain-is IN constant pain, she corrects herself, LOL! Percy, ever helpful, opines that you never know what back pain is until you've slept in a foxhole, but he has some liniment they used to make up from the supplies, if she'd like some. "Wouldn't it be past its sell-by date?" asks Mavis, as Derek gingerly places their drinks on the table. Percy assures her it's recently made up, and she suggests it to Derek, who looks suspiciously at Percy, saying "Oh, yes?" Reg is now in a booth with Maureen, who asks how Rita reacted to the suggestion that she lower her price by £2,000, or was it £3,000, and Reg concedes that Rita was the better businessman. Maureen is upset with her own bad behaviour at the house, as she really liked it, and even Maud wasn't totally against it either. She's surprised that £72,000 was such an insult to Rita. Rita obviously thought so, Reg tells her, the underhanded dirty dog that he is, telling two different tales twice in one day to two different women! At the bar, Rita is telling Jack that Maureen is a very nervy woman. "Still, I suppose it's the prospect of spending the rest of your life with Reg," she explains. "Now, you've lost your chance," Jack tells her. "Bitterness doesn't become you." "Bitter!" cries Rita, "Jack, I've never been more grateful to another woman in all me life!" she tells him, and walks over to Reg and Maureen. As she begins to speak, Reg is happily resigned to a rejection of his house offer, but Rita amazes and horrifies him by telling him he drives a hard bargain, but she'll accept £65,000. Maureen is overjoyed. Reg is speechless. Together at last the ecstatic Maureen cries, you're so clever Reg, you must tell Mother at once! Reg, his face a picture of shock, mutters, "Too clever for me own good, sometimes." Ha! Foiled again, Reginald!

Colin is on his break, reading the paper in the siting room at the Queen's. Liz enters, saying she's sorry, but she needs him. "Ah!" he jumps up eagerly. "I mean, in the bar," Liz smiles. "Right," he says. But she pauses and looks soulfully at him. "What is it we're doing?" she asks him. "You tell me," he replies. "I'm just barely out of a marriage." "Yeah, I know." And they lean together and kiss, gently, "What would Bet Gilroy have to say about this?" Colin asks her. "If there's one thing I'm learning, it's that a landlady has to find her own way of doing things," Liz answers, whereupon Colin wraps his arms around her and this time they give each other a real, prolonged kiss. Alas, Steve appears at the door, takes one look, and turns away. As they separate, Liz smiles that she still needs him in the bar, and as they move towards the door, Steve reappears. Looking as uncomfortable as she did when Andy caught her the previous week, Liz pats her hair nervously. "I've brought some of me stuff back. I'm moving back in," he tells her, and as she looks taken aback, adds, "If it's okay?" in a questioning tone. "Course," she tells him, "Great," with a noticeable lack of enthusiasm, and Steve passes them both by without another word. Once more, Colin and Liz exchange looks, and he exits the room, leaving her looking back after Steve, thoughtfully. Well, now she's blotted her copybook with both of her sons. It'll be interesting to see how Steve reacts to Jim, from now on. Liz is losing her supporters one by one, and only herself to blame, it seems.

Ruth Hempsey

Colin Barnes - IAN EMBLETON Tanya Pooley - EVA POPE Nicky Platt - WARREN JACKSON Mark Redman - Chris Cooke
Written by PATTREA SMALLACOMBE Directed by ROMEY ALLISON

Tuesday (3577, Friday 6 August 1993)

Breakfast time with Jim and Andy in Coronation Street. In the mail there is a form from the insurance company which requires a list of all the missing items. Jim is not impressed. "How the hell am I supposed to know every item that was stolen?" he moans, "I wasn't there." Andy reminds him that Liz was and offers to take the form round to her as she has to sign it too. Jim tells Andy that he will take it. Andy is wary but Jim says he's not going to start a barney. (A row that is, nothing to to do with purple dinosaurs. Thank goodness on both counts.) Jim tells Andy he's being doing a lot of thinking while he was away at his mother's in Belfast and he reckons he has to put his life in order which includes making things straight with Liz.

Breakfast time with Liz and Steve at the Queens. Liz draws on a cigarette and quizzes Steve as to why he is staying with her as the Queens is not as handy for Steve's work. "It's obvious", says Steve, "he came back." "So you've had a row. What about?" Steve tells her just the usual stuff, Jim throwing his weight about. "So if you want to know why I'm here instead of there, says Steve, :It's the same reason as you." Liz tells Steve she didn't walk out on Jim, he walked out on her. "Well you didn't exactly go running after him did you?" Liz is not pleases with Steve's attitude and she draws on her cigarette and tells Steve, through clenched teeth, to go to work. Steve persists with his train of thought. "Of course I've only recently had a choice in the matter. I was born into this family. You actually chose him." "Go to work" hisses Liz, "Shut up and go to work.

In Curly's office he is on the phone. Elaine is sitting by smirking slightly as Curly says, "Yes Mrs. Rogers. No Mrs. Rogers. (Three bags full Mrs. Rogers.)" Mrs. Rogers from Head Office is paying a visit this afternoon. "Oh, trouble?" Ms Innocent asks. Curly tells her she knows very well it's Trouble (with a capital T). He tells her it's trouble because she shopped him to H.O. over the Vera Duckworth incident. "It wasn't an incident, it was shoplifting," Elaine counters. She tells Curly she had no choice she was following procedures. She has no intention of throwing her career away. Curly tells her it was alleged shoplifting. "You stabbed me in back Fenwick and I resent it!" Elaine does not shout back. She agrees with Curly. "Because I was right and you were wrong," she says. "Of course you resent it."

In the Rovers Raquel is serving Ken. "I expect you've been to France?" she inquires. Ken tells her he has quite a few times. "Beautiful country, far too good for the natives." "Oh" says Raquel in slight surprise, "I didn't know they had natives." She tells Ken where she is going on her rip with Gordon. Ken corrects he pronunciation of the River Lowiry (Loire) and the town of Angers (she rhymes it with bangers). She is so impressed that he speaks French she implores him to give her some lessons so she can surprise Gordon and not show herself up in front of his friends. Ken tells her he's no expert but he agrees to teach her some basic phrases. Raquel thanks him and he tells her thank you is "merci". "Oh merci very much," says Raquel "see I'm speaking it already."

At Bettabuys, Curly is mooching around the aisles. Amy asks him if the cat food is still on special offer. Curly answers that he couldn't care less. Amy asks him what's wrong. Curly unprofessionally tells Amy he's in big trouble with Head Office and he wouldn't be surprised if Amy has a new Manager by next week. "Ms Fenwick probably, if Ms. Fenwick has anything to do with it," he says gloomily and slopes off. Amy is puzzled but brightens up as Andy comes over and asks if their date is on for that evening. Amy tells him she has a baby-sitters so it's on. Andy is relieved as he doesn't want to be home this evening. "Dad's back from Ireland, Steve's walked out and it's all doom and gloom at our house", he tells her. Andy is also worried if Jim can handle being on his own when he goes back to Sheffield University.

Awkward moments at Jim's house when Liz arrives to help fill out the insurance claim form. "Why didn't you use your key?, he asks. She tells him it is not her home anymore. Jim tells her it's her house just as much as it's his. "But it's not home." she replies walking into the living room and looking round. Jim tells her the receipts for the video and telly are needed and he doesn't know where they are. Liz sighs, "Where I always keep them - kept them," she corrects herself.

In the Rovers Percy and Jack are on opposites sides of the bar. Derek steps jauntily and orders a half. Then he changes his mind. "No, I'll have a pint and you'll have a drink Percy, I insist." Percy notes Derek is moving well. The liniment has done its work! Derek wonders what was in it. jack is sceptical. Percy tells them that it was given to him by a Medical Corps friend called Corporal Blaine who called it the Liniment of Gratified Desire. (For reasons best known to himself) Percy tells them that the corporal claimed it made old men young. "I could do with some of that," says Jack, "as long as it keeps our Vera away!"

Reg takes a pint over to Rita's table and offers to buy her a refill but she declines as she has to get back and let Mavis out for her dinner. Reg tells her he is in a certain amount of haste because he has to get back for Curly's disciplinary hearing. "Is he in serious trouble?" asks Rita. Reg reckons he is. Throughout this exchange, a worried Jack is earwigging from over the bar. Reg moves on to offer he made for Rita's house. She doesn't want to hear excuses, if he's changed his mind he'd better say so then she can get of with selling it elsewhere.* Reg dithers about the amount of money it would cost to accommodate Maud. He mentions a stairlift for a start. "Oh a stairlift?" says Rita, "I just assumed you'd be turning the garage into a granny flat." This thought had not occurred to Reg before. Even better, Maude would not be in the main house. He beams at Rita, "The offer still stands. Reg Holdsworth's word is his bond."

* For readers not familiar with English real estate sales, unlike Canada the offer to purchase is not a binding contract. Either party may change their mind at any time up to the exchange of contracts which does not take place for several weeks, usually the day of the move. Purchasing or selling a house in England is a very nerve racking venture. In a rising market people can get "gazumped" at the last minute by somebody who makes a higher offer. Or come moving day the seller might find the purchaser has just changed their mind or vice versa. Crazy innit? Note in specified English real estate. In Scotland the law is similar to Canada.

Back at Jim's the form has been completed and Liz is signing it. She tells Jim she will mail it on her way back to the Queens. She tells him she was glad to hear his mother is on the mend. Jim tells them that his mother sends Liz her best (regards). Liz is incredulous. "I can hardly believe that, know her views on the sanctity of marriage." The it dawns on her Jim hasn't told his family they are splitting. Jim tells her he didn't fancy telling them and besides he was hoping he didn't have to because it wouldn't be true. Liz sighs, "They'd better hear soon and hear from you," she tells him. "Because it is true Jim and you know it". She gets up to go but Jim hasn't finished. He asks how the pub staff are behaving and ascertains that she has taken on Des' brother Colin. She goes to leave but he stops her and tells her he's be doing a lot of thinking since he was away and that it's his fault that they split. Liz tells him that it takes two and that since it's over there is no point in having an inquest. She tells him he's got to move forward with his life and he replies he will and he intends to get a job and make something of himself. She tells him she is glad and she hopes it works out for him. On the verge of tears she turns to leave. Chokingly, Jim tells her to take care of herself. "You too", she says and flees.

As Liz leaves the house, Jack is walking down the street. Vera appears with Tommy in the push chair. Jack tells her about the overheard conversation. Curly's in a lot of trouble because of you. He could be for high jump. "Well it serves 'im right," says Vera as they enter the house.

In Bettabuys paper products aisle, Maureen is stacking bog rolls. Reg appears in a very effusive mood, greets his intended and proceeds to tell her about the brilliant idea which he has had about turning the garage into a dwelling for his mother-in-law-to-be. "Put MY mother in a garage!? "She's not some old banger!" Reg explains. "I said transform the garage. It will be her bedsit. Own bathroom She will be on her own while we will have the freedom of the top floor to live and love naked as nature intended (Eeew! way too much information Reg) free from interruption. "Brilliant!" cries Maureen as she playfully slaps him. This encourages Reg to grab her by the hand and pull her behind a pile of aptly named Bounce paper towels for a bit of slap and tickle. Curly, rounding the corner of the display surprises them and collapse of the Bounce rolls follows. Reg is a little crest-fallen at this interruption especially as Curly berates him for using the store as his personal boudoir. "Mrs. Rogers could have seen you" he admonishes. "Your'e over-reacting says Reg, "mind you, you haven't met Mrs. Rogers have you?" Curly asks what she is like. "Wears barbed wire next to the skin. Other that that fairly nondescript" Curly notices Reg has a video with him. It is the security video with Vera on it. Curly hopes Reg is on his side. "Well you and I have discovered the stress of management. It's lonely at the top. No one to call your friend," Reg chortles as he pats the video and struts off.

Joe is at Sally's house. She is surrounded by kids. Sally is now looking after Sarah Lou as it's the school holidays. Joe asks Sally if she is going on holiday. Sally tells him they'd like to but it doesn't look likely. Joe tells Sally he has a friend with a cottage at Ullswater (Lake District) but he cannot get time off as he has used up all his holiday this year. He asks if Sally would like to use the cottage but she says they couldn't afford it. He would like Jonathan to have a holiday and he suggests that he pay the cottage rental and in return Sally take Jonathan as well. Sally says she would love to and will take to Kevin about it.

At Bettabuys it's crunchtime for Curly. Reg introduces Mrs. Rogers. It seems she and Ms. Fenwick have met before on one of Mrs. Rogers training courses. "It was invaluable", simpers Ms. Assistant Manager. Curly offers Mrs. Rogers a chair. Unfortunately it's the wrong one. She chooses to sit in Curly's chair and he is left in the moulded plastic stacker. In inquest begins with Mrs. R confirming that Mr. Watts did not conform to Bettabuy procedure in his handling of the matter in question. Reg signals Curly to explain but Curly is quashed. Having established that there is video evidence available Elaine is asked for her account of events. She explains how Vera's body language and behaviour marked her as a shop-lifter. Curly disputes any incriminating behaviour on the part of Vera. Elaine says on the contrary Vera behaved just like the classic shop-lifter as taught on Mrs. Rogers' course. Curly is out manoeuvred!

At the Queens Liz and Colin are behind the bar. Colin tells Liz he reckons Jim is after a reconciliation. "You don't even know him", says Liz. Colin tells her if he was if Jim's place that's what he'd be doing, thinking up any way he could to get her back. "Any man would. Any man with eyes in his head and could still move. " Liz wants to know how many times he's used that line. Anyway she's not so sure. And any way (this is what Colin really wants to hear) she doesn't think there is a way back. He tells her that's good news, from his point of view at least.

Back at the Spanish Inquisition, back-stabber Elaine is garnishing her version of events with heavy doses of Head Office procedure. Curly is asked if he wants to challenge Elaine's account. He says she is correct in telling what happened but he would like a chance to explain why he did not follow the procedures. He tells Mrs. Rogers about Vera's present circumstances, having to give up work to look after her grandchild and that he felt she needed special consideration in view of the fact she was and ex staff member (which Eaine was not aware of ) and therefore in the interests of management/staff relations he used his initiative. Mrs. Rogers does not seem impressed one way or the other and calls upon Reg for any comments but he declines to say anything. The video is requested and Reg turns it on. Elaine doesn't miss an opportunity to restate that the video will show all the classic shoplifting behaviour. But what is this? It's not classic shoplifting it's a classic movie! Reg acts surprised and then explains he took the video to his fiancee's house because his video player was on the blink. His mother-in-law-to-be loves recording old movies. Oh dear she must have recorded over the security tape. Mrs. Rogers gives Reg the Look. The Look that says "I know exactly what happened and I can't prove it but watch out one day you'll be too clever for your own good and then I'll have you by whatever hair you've still got left". "Nice one Reg!", Curly says under his breath (nudge wink).

In the Rovers Jim tries to buy Steve a drink. Steve refuses and leaves saying he'll do his drinking elsewhere. Jack says he wishes he was in Jim's shoes. He's fancy free and could have any bird he wants. "I wish our Vera would push off." Jim tells Jack he's an idiot and he knows that because he's an idiot himself. Down the bar Raquel is asking Rita if she speaks French. "Not so you'd notice," says Rita. Raquel then tells Rita that she has decided to have lessons because she is going on holiday to France. It's also dawned on Raquel that French will be useful in her career. Rita is puzzled. "How many French folk do you get coming in here?" Raquel explains she means her modelling career. France is where it's all at she tells Rita. When Rita enquires where she is taking lessons Raquel tells her Ken Barlow is teaching her. "Oh well," says Rita "in that case,Yves St. Laurent here you come."

In another part of the bar, Gail and Alma are tired out after a long day. The summer holidays are taking their toll and Alma is fed up with Mark and Nicky hanging around the cafe all day. She thinks Mike should find them a job. Gail wonders, doing what? Alma doesn't care - Mike can shove them up chimneys with brushes in their hands so long as they are out from under her feet.

At Bettabuys Mrs. Rogers is wrapping things up. Elaine is dismissed and Reg tries to leave but Mrs. R wants to speak to Curly and Reg. She reprimands Curly and tells him that Head Office will be monitoring his performance. Reg brown noses shamelessly and assures her that, as Area Manager, he will be keeping his eye on Curly. More nudging and winking behind Mrs Rogers' back. She turns and frostily tells them both that "off the record" their days at Bettabuys are numbered. Reg explodes with a verbal "phew". Curly looks visibly sick. Both hope Mrs. Rogers won't be visiting their neighbourhood again.

Libby Seekings

Elaine Fenwick PIPPA HINCHLEY Colin Barnes IAN EMBLETON Jonathan Broughton TOM LEWIS Amy Nelson LOUISE DUPREY Tommy Duckworth DARRYL EDWARDS Joe Broughton JOHN WEATLEY Mrs. Rogers JILL BENEDICT
Written by JOHN STEVENSON Directed by ROMEY ALLISON

Wednesday (3578, Monday 9 August 1993)

Sally is on at Kevin about the holiday to the lakes. She wants a holiday and this is too good an opportunity to pass up. Kev tells her to get a sitter for the night as they are off to the pictures. "I don't need pictures, Kevin. I need a holiday." She even suggests she will ask Mike for the time off whilst fluttering her eyelashes and lamenting on the girls' rickets! Kevin tells her to get the sitter and he will ask Mike for the time. Sally tells him to be forceful.

Vera, in the corner shop, is looking rather puzzled at a glass jar full of (i'm guessing here) flavoured oil. Emily pops through from the back room dressed in Dierdre's shop outfit. Dierdre is off to her mother's and Emily is filling in, so sayeth Brendan Scott. Vera lets her feelings about this be known at high volume. Asks why she wasn't asked as she has experience. BS (and he isn't he just full of that, too!) "Anyone can stand behind the till, Mrs. Duckworth, but in this emporium, I'm seeking retail flair and talent and old world courtesy. Do you possess these in abundance, Mrs. Duckworth?" Vera responds with "I can add up" and BS heads for the back room. V calls him a toffee-nosed pillock and he turns around saying, "Oh and especially old world courtesy. I do admire that." Emily speaks up then and tells V that she is just filling in. Vera tells her that she could have used the money and that E is taking food out of little Tommy's mouth. Curly, in the meantime, has come in and, after being called a Judas by V, talks to Emily for a bit. He then tells Vera that he received a reprimand for not reporting a suspected shoplifter. She says good. He also tells her that the video evidence got wiped by Reg and he also received a reprimand. Vera tells him he can stick Bettabuys as she prefers to do her shopping at Scott's "where they treat you human <pause> with a bit of old world courtesy." (V was in fine form here!)

At the Queens, Liz is pouring her morning cuppa and Steve is on his way out. He tells her he's got to go and may not be home that night. He is a tad snippy and Liz tells him not to be rude to her. Steve comes back with it's his business like what she does is hers and she wouldn't want him asking what she's been up to, would she?

Des answers his phone and it's Janice. Colin waves his arms and shakes his head no. Des chats a bit with her, acting surprised that Colin's in England and no , he isn't there with Des. He gets off. Colin tells him cheers and tells Des that if she finds him he's "dead - or married , same thing". Des lights into Colin about his plans and asks if he is serious about Liz. He calls him a music hall gag and as he continues to talk, Colin begins telling a joke about a pig. Both continue to talk at the same time each one trying to get their message across. ( ever seen two kids trying to drown out the other one's voice? same thing here) Des then asks Colin how long he is staying and tells him to pack Liz in or get out of his house.

Sally lets Jonathan and Joe in. SaraLouise greets him with a "good morning, Mr Broughton". This leads to a cute exchange between Joe and Sl with him calling her granny platt and then telling her if she calls him Joe, he will stop calling her granny platt. Sally tells him her fingers are crossed over the trip and that Kev is asking today.

At the cafe, the "not me" ghost is at it as Nick and Mark are washing dishes and one falls. Mike comes in with a bucket of car wash supplies and tells Mark he has a job. Every car Kevin works on is to be washed at £2 per car. Mark asks if Nick can join in and Mike says they will have to split the £2 per.

At the Roberts', Alf is studying a map and Audrey is people watching out the window. She comments that they are leaving Grassmere Dr. at the right time as it's not what it once was. Alf says there is a Grassmere Rd. in St. Anne's. Audrey says there is probably a Grassmere something anywhere. He finds a Coronation Road on the map. Audrey mmm's at the news and proceeds to give a fashion critique about some poor woman walking outside. He then goes on about St. Anne's , sand dunes and rabbits, leans back and stretches saying" Ahhh retirement, Audrey, why didn't we do it years ago?" He turns around and finds she's left the room!

At the garage, Mike tells Kevin that Mark and Nick will be washing cars and to add 10 minutes to every job sheet. kevin brings up the holiday and Mike says that would be fine when the rush is over. Kevin says no, next week - they have the opportunity to go next week. Mike asks him to hold off until September. Kevin tells him it has just come up and he has to go. He's been doing all at the garage for the past 2 months and he needs a holiday. Mike tells him that if he goes, don't bother coming back. Kevin says fine but Mike calls him back. He says they'd have to close the garage and they are so busy. Kevin tells him to get someone in - maybe someone he already knows.

Kev pops home and tells Sally "we're going!" Joy abounds at the Websters! He then tells her he'll go into the pub to tell Jim about the job going at the garage.

At the Rovers, Jim and Angie are at the bar. Raquel says she might have one but not beer. Looking at Angie, she comments on what it does to a figure - pot belly, sagging flesh - and she'll stick to slim lines herself. Angie tells her it's brain food. She then goes on to question her life to Jim. She wonders if in 20 years time, she'll still be propping up the bar. Jim tells her he is a living example of what she just said and to look and learn. Kev comes in and asks jim if Baldwin's been in. Angie takes off and Kev tells Jim that Baldwin is looking for a mechanic and he's desperate. Raquel asks Ken if they have a date this afternoon as she's dying to learn French. In walks Baldwin, he talks to Kevin and asks Jim " what the hell are you looking at?"

Colin sings Are You Lonesome Tonight to Liz at the Queens. She tells him not to mess with her in public or when she's busy. Steve comes in, sees the two of them and continues on. Colin and Steve speak to one another - the gist being that Steve doesn't think Colin isn't good enough for Liz and hands off.

BS enquires if there are other things Phyllis needs. She tells him she's not lugging heavy things home and then, tells Emily she hopes she is not neglecting her lodger. "I think Mr. Sugden can take care of himself." Phyllis says she'll call on him. Emily tells her £10.87 for her purchases and Phyllis says it never is! She then says Alf Roberts would never have charged all that. "But," says BS, "did he give you Christmas vouchers and did he provide transport?" he then tells Phllis that she is a valued customer and offers her a ride home with her bags. She says no thank you, she is off to Percy's and "how do I know you'd behave yourself?!;-)" Stunned expression on BS's face! Emily thinks it is an ambitious project - free transport. He agrees but says there is a need. Emily suggests a delivery boy on a bicycle. BS "appropriate with our theme of Victoran values, the use of child labour". And he goes off to investigate the cost efficiency of it.

Speaking of child labour, Mark and Nick are washing the cars and themselves outside the garage. Mike comes up in a "wonderful" mood and tells them he is docking them 50p each, tells Kev, why isn't he minding them, tells Mark boarding school would do him good and goes off again.

Ken gives Raquel a French lesson. She says she feels she should have been born French. Ken asks how much francais she knows. Apparently a Frenchman taught her to say "isn't it a lovely day today" along with red wine, coffee and baguettes. He goes through bonjour and je m'appelle and she repeats after him. He then tells her to put a sentence together - Hello Ken, my name is Raquel. Isn't it a lovely day today. And she does -" bonjour Ken, je m'appelle Raquel. Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir?" LOL!!!!

Kev and Sally walk into the Rovers after their meal out ( they did that instead of the pictures). They sit down with Jim who has been waiting 3 hours there in case, Baldwin showed up and offered him the mechanic job. He then figures that Mike won't show up so goes to get the three of them a drink and in blows Mike. He tells them that this is a set up but tells Jim he starts work tomorrow and he had better take as good as or better care of the garage as Kevin or he's out!

Judith Cooper

Written by STEPHEN MALLATRATT Directed by JULIAN FARINO

Thursday (3579, Wednesday 11 August 1993)

Morning at the McDonald's. Andy is on the phone arranging to see Amy that night. Jim has made breakfast for them, an Ulster fry-up. Mmmmmmcholesterol. Jim tells Andy about his job with Baldwin. Andy's surprised at this considering Jim's history with Baldwin, i.e. rows and telling him to get stuffed. Jim says that's true but he's not exactly overrun with job offers at the moment.

Morning at the McDonald's pt. 2. Liz tries to make small talk with Steve while he shovels down his corn flakes. They are both snippy with each other. Liz says the current circumstances haven't been easy on any of the family. Steve agrees but says that she seems to be having it easier than the rest of them. As if to prove Steve's point Colin (mmmmmmm..Colin) chooses that moment to appear, ready to start the day's work. Liz comments it would be nice if Steve could help out. Steve says Colin should be able to handle it on his own and leaves in a huff. Colin tells Liz not to worry about Steve; he'll get over it.

At the shop Brandon is admiring his 'bicycle deliveries person wanted' sign on the door. Bet walks in, a vision in faux-leopard coat and 20-years-too-late hair-do. BS asks her if she's interested in the job, as she would look "very fetching on a bicycle built for two". "Sorry, the name is Bet not Daisy" she replies "and anyway, I'm not sure I'm ready to reveal my knees in a pair of little.white.shorts." She drags out the last bit and BS is nearly beside himself with, well I'm not sure what but it's very disturbing seeing BS getting this worked up. He's actually stroking the door! Bet strolls to the counter and BS stumbles trying to keep up with her. "I think you do yourself an injustice my lady" he oozes while copping an obvious leer at her cleavage. He flusters for a moment then announces to Emily that he's off to the wholesalers and she needs to remember to make a written note of all the applicants that come in about the delivery job. (He's expecting 100's by the sound of it!).

Des is at the counter in the shop and Emily is packing up some groceries for him. Bet asks if he's having a party, as there is so much stuff. Des says it's just for him and Colin and 'our kid' will have gotten through all of it by tomorrow. Bet remarks she thought Colin looked like a man of "healthy appetites"! Emily asks if Colin is working for Liz McD. Des looks a bit uncomfortable but says that the Barnes boys are prone to helping out, "nature's gents" he declares and leaves.

Joe arrives at Sally's. Sally is enthusing about the upcoming cottage holiday. She says that Kev's managed to get the time off. Joe says that's great but doesn't sound too convinced. Sally is so wrapped up in holiday plans that she doesn't notice.

Across the street Jim tells Kevin he can't wait to get stuck into the mechanic's job. Kev says he'll probably be sick of Baldwin by the end of it. Jim doesn't disagree but says he's put up with worse than Baldwin.

Mark & Nicky arrive at the labour camp to earn their whopping £2/washed car. Kev reminds them to vacuum the interiors and empty the ashtrays. "Flippin' slave driver" mutters Nicky. Mark agrees but says it's better than staying home and listening to him Mom rant. Mark also tells Nicky about going to boarding school but says he's not sure how he feels about it. In the office Kevin takes a call from Maggie but says he doesn't know where Mark is.

Liz is sitting on a bench outside a building that looks like a hospital. Colin walks over to her (insert obvious comments here) and sits down. She tells him all the attention he pays her makes her uncomfortable. He doesn't really want to talk about that so quickly changes the subject, he wants to take her to Amsterdam for the weekend! He tells her the red light district is a real hoot. Liz, not at all fazed that she inspires men to want to take her to a red light district, asks what about Steve? Colin sarcastically says he can come too but three's a crowd! Liz says she's noticed he and Steve haven't exactly hit it off. Colin dismisses it all again and says she should stop feeling guilty. He tells her "her selfish little family" will cash in on that as long as she continues to allow it.

Back at Camp Baldwin Nicky and Mark wash cars. Jim and Kevin fix cars. Mike lords it over them. Maggie pulls up looking for Baldwin Blood. She finds Mike getting into his car and lets rip calling him a "manipulative rat". How dare he tell Mark he was going to boarding school without consulting her! Mike stutters a bit and says he should have mentioned it but really can't understand why she's getting so worked up, after all he only has Mark's best interests at heart and she'd be totally selfish if she stood in the way of Mark's advancement. Maggie points out he has no legal right to be in Mark's life; he only sees Mark because she allows it and he'd do well to remember that or she'll see to it that he no longer has anything to do with Mark!

In the Rovers, Raquel is practicing her French. Steve takes a dig at her about it. Raquel sniffs to Betty "Do you know the trouble with folk round here is they've no respect for education." Hmmm.une lesson francais and the girl is a card-carrying member of MENSA.

At a table Andy & Steve discuss Jim 's new job. Steve reckons it won't last but Andy tells him Jim seems determined to make a go of things this time. Steve says it doesn't impress him but Andy says he's not the one Jim's trying to impress. Steve doesn't think Liz will be bothered as she has Colin now; he tells Andy he caught them snogging the other night. They agree this is not information to share with Jim.

Nicky goes to the shop to apply for the delivery boy job (having been told about it earlier by Jim). BS interviews him while Emily throws in glowing comments about Nicky's character, reliability etc. BS agrees to give Nicky a chance. Nicky is rapt, even more so when he finds out he'll be allowed to take home the bike too!

Bet turns up at the Queens for a natter with Liz. Liz says she misses sitting in the back room at the Rovers 'dishing the dirt'. Colin pokes his head in the door and says he'll be back for the evening shift. Bet says he seems quite "willing". Liz says he's just being helpful, a godsend actually since her head barman went AWOL. Ha!  Bet won't be fooled that easily.

In "t'caff", Audrey and Alf argue over the bungalow, Audrey will make Alfie's life hell should they miss out because of his pigheadedness. Nicky bursts in very excited and pleased with himself over his new job. Alf snorts! His grandson working for the likes of Brandon Scott!! Audrey says she's proud of him. Alma asks if Mark is working there too. No, says Nicky and then proceeds to tell her about Maggie turning up and giving Mike a "right slagging off". Alma looks quite pleased about this!

The ads end and we are treated to an extreme close up of Bet's ciggie holder! Pull back to Bet, who has ditched the faux-leopard coat to reveal a matching leopard trimmed white blouse, lovely! She asks Liz how she's coping on her own and is it really over between her and Jim. Liz says yes in so much as she can't see them living together anymore but she stills cares about what happens to him. Bet gets right to the point, what's up between Liz & Colin? Liz dodges the question gracefully and just replies that she finds Colin thoughtful and funny. Also, he makes her feel good. It's just a harmless flirtation she tells Bet. Bet says she knows what it's like to feel vulnerable and Liz should think hard about the situation she's in.

We now go to Amy's house where she and Andy have just finished dinner. They chat while her Mom cleans up. Andy tells her its nice being there compared to home and the constant rowing. Amy says he shouldn't be too hard on his parents, as their whole world has been turned upside down; maybe they need to lean on him for a change.

Raquel arrives at Ken's for French lesson numero deux. She admires Ken's flat and says she wants to find a place of her own but it's so expensive. Ken says living on your own isn't all it's made out to be. Raquel says she's surprised that he's on his own because he's clever and "not too bad looking for his age" and even Jack Duckworth has someone. Ouch! Ken says he'd rather live on his own than with Vera! Ken tells Raquel that going to a few French movies might help her along with her lessons. Raquel asks if he'd go with her - not to the naughty ones of course as they wouldn't be that helpful, all that moaning, ooohing and aaaahhhing must sound the same in any language.

Alma and Mike are having a drink in the Rovers, she asks him about his day. He tells her but does not mention the run-in with Maggie. Alma brings it up and Mike accuses her of having 'spies'. Mike defends his actions by saying Maggie wants Mark tied to her apron strings and he's afraid she'll turn him into a Mummy's boy! He needs to get Mark away from all that - it's unhealthy! He's only doing all this for Mark's benefit. "The sad thing is" says Alma "is that you really believe that, don't you?"

On the other side of the bar, Audrey has finally worn Alf down about the selling price for the Grassmere Drive house. He says he'll take less but immediately reels off a list of all the things Audrey won't be able to have once they move.

Des comes in and orders a pint. Bet comments how indispensable Colin has made himself at the Queens. Des is obviously bothered by this.

In our closing scene we have Jim & Steve finishing their dinner. Jim tells Steve how different things will be now. He's going to keep his mouth shut and fists in his pocket. He's going to make a go of the new job. He still loves Liz and wants her back. He reckons he's in with a chance too if he can prove to her he's changed. This is too much for Steve who snaps that Jim was right about Colin; he can't keep his mucky paws off Liz. Ooops! Steve apologizes for letting that slip but Jim says he was right to say. End shot of Jim staring down into his empty plate.

Tammy Mitchell

Kathy Nelson: ALIBE PARSONS
Written by: ADELE ROSE Directed by: JULIAN FARINO

Friday (3580, Friday 13 August 1993)

Ah. But the reality is much different. Oh yes, Nicky gets to ride the delivery bike and even take it home. But the bike is an antique, must be 50 years old or more and weighs a ton. It also has a panel on it advertising Mr. Scott's Provisions. It does at least have hand brake and a little horn but it also has a big girly basket on the front! Nicky looks crestfallen while Martin tries to get assurance that the basket won't be dangerously overloaded. Brendan disdainfully wonders if Nicky really can ride a bike. He can, of course. Martin seems concerned for Nicky's safety while BS is more concerned by the cost he's put into buying and restoring the bike!

Steve nearly makes it out the back door of the Queens before breakfast but Liz catches him. He doesn't seem to want to be around lest he spill the beans that he told his father about Colin and Liz. He does impart the news that Jim's got a job working at the garage before he high tails it out the back gate.

Over at Jim's he is broaching a tricky subject with Andy, wondering if steve would tell tales maliciously out of spite. Andy doesn't think so but when he hears that Steve told his father that Colin has been sniffing around Liz, he adamantly denies it, saying Liz is too good for Colin who is merely an employee. But later in the day he shamefacedly admits to his father that there does seem to be something going on. He was just afraid to tell Jim. Jim sighs heavily, realizing he's probably blown it and wonders what the hell he is going to do about it.

For a shop that's supposed to be old fashioned it seems odd to see a modern jar of Ragu pasta sauce on the counter. Ken is buying a few of Scott's provisions from Emily who does seem to suit the uniform better than Deirdre did. Brendan ushers Nicky out the door on his maiden voyage and after bragging up his deliver service, Ken takes pleasure in taking the piss out of him by commenting that he should have stayed upstairs and had delivery. Yes, how droll, is Scott's ineffectual come back line. Raquel pops in as well, telling Ken she's got a busy day so if they're to have another French lesson, it has to be this morning. He's got domestic chores to do but she ends up following him upstairs anyway, they can do their lessons while he works!

Kevin gets Jim sorted at the garage before he and Sally leave. Mark is washing cars and Mike, carrying a large yellow pages directory, asks the men's opinion of private schools getting about the response you'd expect.

Up in Ken's flat, Raquel practices her French one to tens while Ken irons shirts. He takes her through shopping scenarios and she seems to be grasping the language fairly well for a beginner but oddly enough, the cross culture shopping experience seems to be slightly out of her reach. First it was the exchange rate between francs and pounds that has her baffled and then follow a funny exchange. I'll recount it, though not exactly word for word but it went something like this, a real classic Corrie type scene!

Raquel: Suppose I'm buying . . . (thinking) Ken suggests, Shoes! Raquel, looking down at hers, perturbed, "Summat wrong with these?" Ken assures her not, he's just setting up a scene. Raquel, Oh right, Shoes. "Je desire un chausseur" she tentatively says. Ken: Except you'd want TWO shoes wouldn't you? Not just one ("un") Raquel corrects herself, deux chausseurs Ken: Except you don't ask for "two shoes" you ask for "some" shoes, don't you? Raquel, seeing this isn't going to work for her, decides any shoes she'll be needing she'll buy before she goes. And the sizes are different aren't they? Ken decides to go down another road, "bread, then" Raquel: Well to start with you'd have to need to go into a different shop! Ken, with the patience of Job and 30 years of teaching, agrees you would. The first one or two sentences go along fine, with Raquel deciding on a "grand" loaf over a "petit". Ken then tells her in shopkeeper mode, that it will cost her 8 francs. Raquel: The French seem to do a lot more talking than we do. In a corner shop, she usually just goes in and gets her loaf and slaps it down on the counter. Ken tells her she could do that in France as well but it is much more satisfying to have a conversation in the French language. Raquel considers this but decides not if you were getting hungry. (logical) Ken, again earning my respect by not offering "Work with me, here!" and instead agreeing that she'd probably be best just slapping her loaf down on the counter. Raquel, decisively, "I might just do that" and then goes back to her vocabulary lists.

Brilliant! :-)))

In the café Mike is now telling Alma about the day school plans and is making arrangements to meet Maggy in the café at 3, right under Alma's nose so he doesn't' appear to be doing anything behind her back. Audrey pops in to confirm that Martin and Gail are coming over for the evening, followed closely by Alf (still attached to her hip, I see) who wants to prevent Audrey standing there gabbing. They've got to go over to Lythham to see the bungalow again. Already I'm getting the feeling that Alf is now the one more excited about the move than Audrey who was the initial instigator.

Des and Colin have another discussion about Liz. Colin promises he's been the model of propriety and constraint. Des asks what Colin is doing hanging around a married woman who's husband lives across the road. Colin's over confidence wavers, and he admits when he figures it out, he'll let Des know.

The Websters are packing. Angie's come over to give Sally a blouse she's made but can't seem to sell (oh right, I want something that nobody else wants, too!) Sally is pleased however but Angie won't take any money for it and leaves. Sally mentions that Joe is meeting them at the cottage (well he would have to if she's going to be looking after Johnathan, wouldn't he?)

Over at the Queens, the phone rings. Tanya, who's been teasing Colin about errant wives calling, picks it up and makes sure Colin knows it's an errant husband on the line, Jim! Liz takes the call and Jim tells her he wants to have a chat about "us". But it's a bad time as it's dinnertime and the pub is busy so Liz promises to call him back later, early evening probably.

Sally and Kevin set off. Next door, Mark is teasing Nicky about the ugly bike. BS slinks out and makes disparaging remarks about how late back Nicky is and then sets him to the task of washing the bike.

In the café, Alma seethes as Mike and Maggy meet to talk about private school. Alma knows Mike is being obtuse, just so he can say he didn't do anything behind her back. (Oh. I see. So, she isn't happy when he does things behind her back and she isn't happy when he does it in front of her! He can't win for trying!) Anyway she even interrupts his meeting, calling his mobile from the café phone 10 feet away to harp at him. She later observes that Mike is winning Maggy over to his view, which he is now that he's suggested a day school instead of boarding school. Gail wonders if she shouldn't warn Maggy. What for? Alma snipes caustically, nobody warned me about him!

Back to the Queens, Colin asks Liz how he should proceed, working with a lovely lady that he fancies but who seems to be in a strange situation. Liz reflects that although Jim's popping Wilmore one was the thing that parted them, it isn't what's keeping them apart. She never thought she'd ever leave Jim but now she has, she's fairly sure she doesn't want to go back. Colin likes that answer and asks again how he should proceed. She thanks him for his patience and understanding. Agh! The kiss of death, he jokes! He will never have a chance if that's how she sees him, patient and understanding! I don't think he needs worry.

Lovely views of the Lake district as Kevin's car winds its way down a country road and pulls up by a cottage with a lake view and flower baskets hanging from some sort of arbor. Joe and Johnathan come out to greet them. Later, after Johnathan is in bed and the three adults are enjoying a drink on the front porch or landing or whatever. Joe makes his excuses and decides he'd better be on the road back home and thanks Sally who thanks Joe for the cottage. Kevin and Sally start to have a cuddle but are interrupted by little Johnathan, who can't sleep as he's in a strange new place. Kevin pouts when Sally goes to soothe the little boy.

Over at the Roberts' abode, Alf is boring the pants off Martin and Gail showing them the estate agent flyers and endlessly wittering on about the advantages of Lytham. Audrey sarcastically remarks on the excitement of it all, they even have a mobile library that comes around every week! Martin and Gail laugh when Alf takes it serious, Aye they do have! And then he wonders why they are laughing at him. I was right, it does seem like Alf is more interested in the move than Audrey though she hasn't said so yet.

Back at the Rovers, Des buys Angie a drink. I didn't realize but she's been flogging her designs on the market. Raquel makes a few snippy remarks about Angie's lack of business acumen and Des manages to steer Angie away from the bar and out of trouble. Alma and Mike come in, Alma gobbing off about the school thing, still. She's spoiling for an argument as she is picking on everything he says and twisting it negatively.

Over the road, Andy makes a last cup of tea for him and his father who is restlessly reading a newspaper and admits to Andy that Liz was supposed to call but hasn't. Andy suggests he call her but Jim is too conscious of making another bad move. He really doesn't want to blow his chances, wanting to learn from his mistakes. But learning from his mistake is the hardest thing he's ever done (Boy you've said a mouthful, there, me laddo!)

He's probably learned the lesson too well, however as over at the Queens, the inevitable is about to happen. Tanya leaves for the night and Liz offers Colin the door if he wants, she'll finish up. He indicates that he wants to stay. Very much. His meaning more than clear, he means, he wants to say for breakfast. Her look says she knows. She comes to him and kisses him soundly. She tells him to lock up and get the lights but not to bolt the door as Steve might be back. And she'll see him "upstairs". He doesn't exactly break out into a wide ear to ear grin but he does have a look on his face that reflects his disbelief at his luck!!!

Diane Johnston

Written by PETER WHALLEY Directed by JULIAN FARINO Lake scenes Directed by MERVYN CUMMING


Originally transmitted: 16, 18, 20, 23 & 25 August 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 3 - Friday 7 July 2000
Episode Numbers: 3581 - 3585

Monday (3581, Monday 16 August 1993)

We open today at Number 11, where Jim is wearily buttering a slice of toast, as Andy dashes into the room. Jim forgot to wake him, and all he has time for now is a glass of milk. Jim is contrite, and doesn't know where his head is at today. Andy is worried about him, but it's clear why he's distracted, as Liz failed to phone him the night before, and probably won't call at all, thinks the pessimistic Jim. Andy is reassuring. She'll call the garage, she'll have been busy, but Jim has decided to visit the Queen's to see her. No, he can't do that, it's off-limits, Andy reminds him, and Jim flares up. "Nobody's going to stop me seeing my wife!" Andy soothes him, Liz will phone, give it a bit longer, and irascibly, Jim agrees to do it Andy's way.

Across the street, Phyllis arrives at Des's, as Des, fixing his tie, is preparing to leave for work. She needs a favour. Alma is going to be away for a few days, and Gail wants her help in the café. Des is agreeable, but Phyllis is apologetic, not wanting to let Des down. Des smiles that he hopes he's as much in demand when he's her age, at which Phyllis tells him she'll pop round in the evening, giving him a nudge with her elbow. "Thanks, but the neighbours might talk," he teases her, but she couldn't care less. "Yeah, you mightn't," Des laughs. After their usual mock flirting session, they settle down to business. Phyllis will give the place a quick tidy up, she tells him, and is ready to do the upstairs. When Des replies, "Just mine, eh," Phyllis is put out, thinking Colin is still abed. Des doesn't know, as Colin didn't come home the night before, whereupon Phyllis asks if he's worried, or perhaps he knows where Colin is? "Let's just say, I won't be sending out a search party," Des assures her, and so he does know where Colin is, Phyllis concludes. He pecks her on the cheek, and tells her to be sure to lock up. "Spoilsport!" Phyllis calls after him, as he leaves.

At the Queen's Steve opens the kitchen door, only for his jaw to drop, as a topless Colin greets him. (Who says Corrie is getting sensationalist? Even in 1993, they were flaunting the young men's muscles-or lack of them! Wasn't it Steve who was topless last Monday?) Colin thought that Steve had already left for work, and is busily opening doors, searching for the marmalade and butter. "It was the postman," Steve answers, and slaps the mail onto the counter. "Are these for your mother? I'll take them up, as she wants a lie in," says Colin, and offers Steve the use of the toaster, but his answer is the slamming door. Steve isn't listening. He's gone.

"Ah, that's £12.63 ," Brendan Scott tells Betty at the Emporium, and asks if she wants her shopping delivered. She doesn't have far to go, as it's for the Pub, she tells him, and we see Emily greet Nicky, who has wheeled in the Victorian delivery bicycle. He's had a puncture, but that doesn't matter to Brendan. "Not in here, boy! Not in here," he cries. "Out on the street with you! Come on, out on the street," flapping his hands at the poor little lad, as Betty calls him. "He looked right out of puff," she tells Emily, who agrees that it's a heavy bike to push. Nicky returns sans bike, and Brendan awaits, in a reverse Scaramouche stance, his stomach under its immaculate white apron thrust out importantly. Now," he asks, "Do you have a repair kit?" "No," says Nicky. "Well, you'd better borrow one from somebody," says Brendan, and Betty pipes up that Reg Holdsworth will have one, for his bed. "His bed?" Brendan is mystified. "Yes, he's got a rubber one," she cheerfully assures him. "It's filled with water," Emily agrees, and they both nod at him, happily. "Really," sneers Brendan, but is content to accept Emily's further suggestion to take the bike to Jim at the garage. Nicky is to hurry back, as there's another delivery to be made, and must also practice his whistle. "Whistle! Whistle! lad! Do you hear me? Whistle!" Brendan urges Nicky, and returns to the counter, to conclude Betty's shopping expedition. Betty wants her voucher, as she's spent over £10, but he demurs, as it was for the pub. So what, Betty wonders. "We don't give vouchers for businesses," he condescendingly explains. "Listen! I've done the shopping. I'm a pensioner. I'm entitled," retorts Betty. "I don't think so, I'm very sorry," he smugly tells her "Oh, stuff it! I'll shop somewhere else," huffs Betty, and stalks off with her bags, which prompts Brendan to recant, "Just this once," and usher her out of the shop with a gushing of "pleasure to serve you," etc., etc. What a Uriah Heep is this Mr. Scott! He reminds me of the song from My Fair Lady, and the character who "oiled his way across the floor," according to Professor Higgins! Yuck!

Outside in the street, Steve closes the boot/trunk of his little red car, and lugs his belongings to the door of Number 11, watched by a puzzled Jim, who is standing in front of the garage. The garage phone rings, and Jim ignores the pooped-looking Nicky, trudging over with the bike, as he hurries to answer it. "Hullo, Liz?" he asks hopefully, but it's only a customer looking for Kevin, and service. Jim's telephone etiquette isn't too gracious, but when Nicky asks for help to mend a puncture, Jim smiles and says, "Come on, son." Not such an ogre, is our Jim.

Sally is setting a white, wrought iron table on a shingled beach, cheerfully dealing with the two kiddies, Rosie and Jonathan, as she works. She sends Rosie off to fetch the slugabed Kevin, and asks Jonathan what he'd like to do today. Jonathan enthusiastically suggests boating, and Sally agrees, adding that a picnic would be fun too. Kevin appears at a window, with Rosie, and during their playful, teasing badinage, we get a lovely view of the Cumbrian hills, and the lake, behind Sally. Oh, I did like that view, even with the cloudy grey skies, as that's where my better half and myself honeymooned, 36 years ago-final year Uni. students don't have the dosh for Paris! Kevin and Sally love it so much, that Kevin joshes Sally that he's decided they're not going back-they're staying there, but Sally says, "Oh, Kev! Wouldn't it be wonderful," in a wistful tone. I quite agree Sally. Shangri-La!

Meanwhile, back at the garage, Jim is patiently coaching Nicky on how to fix an inner tube puncture, now that he's found the spot with the bubbles coming out, but he doesn't allow Steve to pass by without a word with him, and asks what's going on? Steve is moving back to the Street, and doesn't expect Jim to mind, but Jim is wondering how Liz feels about it, and is worried that she and Steve have had a row. Little Nicky pops up between them, wondering what to do next, after he's dried the inner tube and marked the puncture, but Jim tells him to hold on a minute. Jim wants Steve's reassurance that all is well, and Steve tells him to ask Liz, but Jim is still waiting for her to phone. Jim won't let up on Steve, who finally tells him that Liz won't even notice if he's at the Queen's or not. "I'd just be in their way," he tells his Dad. "What? That Colin Barnes character?" asks Jim, and Steve says that in his opinion, Colin has Liz wrapped around his little finger. "Yeah," says Jim, taking off his work coat. I don't think he's going to wait any longer for Liz to call.

At the Café, Gail is asking Audrey if she's still having second thoughts about the move to Lytham St. Anne's. Of course not, Audrey replies, and it'll be lovely to have the kiddies over, as they're near the beach, but Gail (and presumably Martin!) are welcome too, to drop in whenever they like. Gail doesn't think that'll be too often, as the Roberts will have their own life to lead, but Audrey seems dubious, as they won't know anyone at their new abode. "But you will, eventually," Gail reassures her, and Phyllis adds her penn'orth-Lytham would suit her, as "All the show business people live there, AND the pop stars." Audrey laughs, but doesn't think they'll be moving in those circles, as Alf will be scoffing hotdogs on the front! (The beach promenade, with touristy stuff like buckets and spades, and fast food joints) The camera lights on Alf, who is stuffing what looks, suspiciously, like a bacon butty, into his face, as she speaks.

It's fairly busy in the Queen's, as Jim strolls in, macho-man style, and leans on the bar. Tanya Pooley looks nervous, and hopes he isn't expecting to be served, but Jim hasn't come for a drink. It doesn't matter, as Tanya is under strict orders, and Jim isn't allowed on the premises. She doesn't want any trouble. "Who's causing trouble?" asks Jim, and asks where Liz is. She went shopping half an hour ago. Jim thinks that's' a tale Tanya was told to tell him, (Ooh! Alliteration!), but Tanya says to ask the barman if he doesn't believe her, and asks Colin to confirm it. He does, and wants to know why HE-meaning Jim-wants to know? "Told ya," says Tanya, smugly, to Jim, and "It's her husband, Jim," to Colin. Colin keeps his cool, and asks if there's a message for Liz. "As a matter of fact, there's two," agrees Jim, "One for her, and one for you-you are Colin Barnes, aren't you?" Jim wants a wee word with him. Colin looks resigned, and suggests they discuss it outside, to which Jim agrees, and marches determinedly behind the bar, and we fade to black, and an ad break! After the break, we're in the backyard of the Queen's, where Colin asks Jim what the problem is, which makes Jim laugh ironically. Colin counters by reminding Jim that the split up was long before he himself came on the scene. "She's still a married woman," states Jim. "Quite capable of making her own decisions," replies Colin. Jim shifts the subject to Colin, who's a steward in the Merchant Navy, and Jim is sure he'll find plenty of things to do to make himself useful around the Queen's. "So?" says Colin. "So," replies Jim, "You wouldn't be thinking of taking advantage of her, and her owning the place, would you?" (I thought she was the manager, not the owner!) "It's not like that," denies Colin, but Jim expresses his disbelief. "Look," Colin argues, "I don't want to cause any trouble," but Jim tells him he's done just that, not only with Liz, but also with Steve. This takes Colin by surprise, as he thought he and Steve got along. "Oh, yes? And that's why he packed his bags then?" jibes Jim. This also disturbs Colin, who, on the defensive all along, tells Jim that Steve didn't have to go because of him. Jim thinks it will suit Colin just fine, being alone with Liz on the premises. "I haven't moved in, you know," Colin answers. "No, but it's crossed your mind, hasn't it?" presses Jim. Colin denies it, but Steve thinks different, Jim tells him, and that's why he's packed his bags. Steve's had enough, and so has Jim. "Well I hope that's not a threat," offers Colin, in nervous bravado. "Huh!" cries Jim, in disgust, "just listen to me, son! She's my wife. She's my responsibility. And as long as I'm still married to her, I don't want her hurt." "Aye, well, I wouldn't do that," is Colin's response. "Well, mind you don't," Jim warns him emphatically. "Just treat her properly, do you understand, son?" he says, more quietly, and sighs. "Long after you've set sail into the sunset, I'll still be here, okay, so do me a wee favour, eh? Just tell her that." And walks off, leaving Colin taking a deep breath of relief. The body language of the two men was very effective in this scene. Throughout, Jim barely moved, standing upright, hands in pockets, looking confident and assured. In contrast, Colin never faced him, but leant, one hand on a crate, as if seeking support, with his side towards Jim, which made him look the scared weakling, and in the wrong, and that he knew it. Pretty strong acting, from both, and tense, with the surprise of Jim not telling Colin to keep away from his wife, but to be good to her, showing how seriously Jim is taking his new attitude towards his life. Good stuff!

Once again we move to the Emporium, with Audrey and Emily, and the topic is still the move to Lytham. Emily has always liked the place, and has known some very nice people there. Audrey tells her of Phyllis's comment about the showbiz folks, and Emily concurs. "Oh, yes! One of the Roly-Poly's I believe." "Oh, don't tell Alf! They're his pinups!" enjoins Audrey, and they laugh. [Another footnote, here: obviously, the Roly Poly's referred to are not just the wibbly wobbly toys we all know about, but a group of real people. Alas, my search of British papers, Teletext, BBC site, etc., only gave me five photos of about five, chubby, middle-aged ladies, dressed in bright blue jackets, boaters, and stockings and high heels, along with two different gentlemen. One photo looked like a cooking segment on TV, but the other four, were from a pantomime. So-the Roly-Poly's are real women, but what they do, I couldn't find out. As they are short and chubby, and Alf's pinups, they don't match Audrey at all!] Back to the story-Nicky enters the shop, and Audrey proudly tells Brendan that he's her grandson, and hopes that he's not being overworked. Mr. Scott takes umbrage at this, saying it's 2 o'clock and only one delivery made, then asks Nicky about the puncture. Audrey thinks that is unfair, and, "Said it were an old bike! Tube were full o' patches!" Nicky pipes up to Brendan. Emily dares to say that it probably needs a new tube, but Brendan quickly changes the subject-he doesn't want to expend any more pounds, shillings, or pence than necessary, that's obvious. He gives Nicky a package destined for Grasmere Drive. Of course, Audrey offers to deliver it to save Nicky the long pedal, but no, Brendan will have none of that. There's the publicity to consider, "and mind you come back the long way round!" he tells Nicky, who tells his Granny, "And I got to whistle!" as he walks out, which brings a smile to both Audrey and Emily's faces.

We're back at the Lake District, in the next scene, with Kevin manfully rowing a boat filled with Sally, Rosie and Jonathan, back to shore, all very cheerful, but as they carefully disembark, helped by the attendant at the shore, all I could think was-where are their lifejackets? I couldn't see any, which I found very surprising. Very bad example there, ITV-water safety and all that, I thought to myself. Ironically, right after they land, Sally tells the children not to go too close to the water, and Kevin agrees, saying, "Be careful," then the two of them sit on a bench, and Sally wonders how Jonathan's mother could have walked off and left him. We get a close up of the two children-WITH life jackets on-watching the boatman tie up the boat. That's good then, but, the adults really should have had them on too-so there! Anyway, Jonathan is much happier these days, and so are Sally and Kevin. Two weeks off together, like a second honeymoon, says Kevin. "Not quite," Sally grins at him, "but it's good to get away from Weatherfield." However, this reminds Kevin that he should call Jim, in case there are any problems at the garage. You're joking, is Sally's response. She wants Kevin to promise not to mention Coronation Street, the Rovers', or MVB Motors, which suits him just fine. They're obviously relishing their break from the daily grind, and who would blame them? Not me!

In the Queen's bar, Tanya is talking about Jim's visit. She's surprised at his forbearance, and was ready to call for an ambulance, as he's got a very violent reputation. Colin doesn't want to discuss it, and tells her to check on the broken glass in the Ladies washroom, when Liz hurries in with her shopping bags, sorry to be late, and wondering how they've gotten on. Colin takes her bags from her hands, telling her they were busy, but, "We've had a visitor, haven't we?" Tanya pipes up, and again Colin tells her to see to the broken glass, but she ignores him. "Jim's been looking for you," she's pleased to tell Liz, who looks serious, but tells Tanya, Thanks, she can be off until the evening shift. "Well, I told him he was barred, so they went outside, didn't you?" the little troublemaker asks Colin. Again, Liz is polite and contained, and waits until Tanya is gone before asking Colin, "Well?" anxiously. Colin is upset that she hadn't told him about Steve leaving, but she didn't want him to think it had anything to do with him. "That's not what Jim thinks," Colin tells her. She immediately wants to know what Jim has said about the pair of them, as she assumes Steve has told Jim. Colin replies that Jim said nothing much, as he seemed to accept it. Liz is sceptical, and presses for details. "Well, he said he understood the position, and he hoped I wouldn't abuse it," Colin tells her. She's surprised that that was all. Colin's answer sounds like, "Well, he was gonna shake hands," which we know didn't happen! Liz wishes she had phoned the night before, but Colin tells her to leave it, as Jim knows what the situation is. She still doesn't believe that Jim accepts it. "I don't think we'd be standing here if he didn't," concludes Colin, who picks up her bags again and exits, leaving Liz looking pensive.

At Number 11, Andy enters to find Steve setting the table, to his surprise. Steve tells him that he's living there now, bad luck, which surprises Andy even more, as Steve couldn't stand to be in the same room with his Dad not so long before. "He's in the kitchen, lesser of two evils," Steve tells Andy. "Loverboy stopped last night." Interested, Andy asks if Loverboy is moving in. "Might as well. He's acting the flipping landlord," complains Steve. "And did me Mam phone?" asks Andy. Steve tells him no, and that Jim went round to the Queens' but Liz wasn't there. Andy thinks that that was just as well. "So he had a few words with Colin," Steve continues. "And kicked his head in! Don't tell me!" exasperated Andy replies. "No, no, no-said he played the perfect gentleman-quite proud of himself," Steve explains. "You know what this is, don't you? It's all part of the new persona. He thinks he'll get her back," Andy tells Steve. At this point, Jim breezes in with their dinners, full of vitamins and protein, and the three of them sit down to eat together-what a reversal of fortune for Jim.

As Raquel enters the back door of the Rovers', Betty is down her throat immediately, seeing that it's Bet's night off, and Raquel was supposed to be back by six. Raquel has been to the sauna (?) and tells Betty to rest for half an hour if she couldn't cope, which prompts Betty to indignantly respond, that she never said she couldn't cope! There's been a phone message from Gordon, about he and Raquel being asked out the next night, of which Raquel knows nothing. As they talk, Vera's voice yells from the bar, "I say! Is anybody serving?" "Hang on a minute," yells back Betty, and they continue to discuss the phone call, which is all written down by Betty. Raquel is just in time to call him back-it's six thirty. "Don't be long," Betty tells her. Raquel calls Gordon and tells him that she can't make tomorrow night, but he shouldn't be upset, as they'll be together for two whole weeks. She says she'll call him back tomorrow. "Raquel!" Betty's voice from the bar is heard, and off Raquel rushes, where Vera is arguing that she was there before Des. Although Raquel asks, "Who's next?" she ignores Vera's request for a half of lager and lime, and Des's for a pint, to ask Ken if he needs a refill. He hardly notices, but Vera is annoyed. "That's charming, that is," she sputters. Des asks Ken what aftershave he's wearing, as he needs to get some himself, if he wants to get his drink. Ken is nonplused, so Des tells him to forget it and asks again for his pint. Betty serves Vera, but Martin offers to pay, and asks for his own pint too. Vera is charmed, but still annoyed at Raquel, who doesn't appreciate having a good job. "Look at her, Dolly Daydream! She'd be late to her own funeral," opines Vera. "Our Nicky's been having second thoughts about working for a living," Martin tells her. "I'm not surprised with that toad Brendan Scott," she replies, but it doesn't do any harm starting young. Her first job, was at Chapel's Coal Merchants, Vera reminisces. "Oh, so that's why you've got such big muscles!" Raquel interrupts. Vera is taken aback. "What are you talking about?" "Humping all them bags of nutty slack," Raquel explains, as Martin bites his lip and looks to the ceiling. "If you must know, I were cleaning offices!" retorts Vera, "and I don't have to come in here to be insulted by your sort!" "Why? Where do you usually go?" Raquel simpers, "Touché! Did you hear that Ken? Touché?" she repeats - as proud as punch and just as wooden-headed! "Yoo-hoo!" yells Audrey, to Gail, at her table, who then calls to Martin to get her Mam a gin and tonic. Audrey looks more cheerful, as she's been shopping, but where's Alf? He's at a Council meeting, "waste disposal, or cemetery, something really exciting like that," Audrey tells Gail, and wonders what she and Alf will talk about when he gives up the Council. She's been buying curtains, and looking at carpets too, although they're included in the selling price of the Lytham house. Gail is shocked-Alf will go spare! But Audrey says, "Let him! I'm not going to live with other folks' dreary old leftovers!" Martin arrives with the drinks, and Audrey says she'll get the next round, "as soon as the walking wallet arrives." [Poor old Alf-last week a scratching dog, and this week a worn piece of old leather!] Audrey is all chuffed, as Alf has arranged a golf game for the morrow, since she wanted to get in with that set-which she doesn't recall. "But it sounds like you," laughs Gail. Perhaps they'll meet a celebrity, as they play golf, don't they? "Oh, aye! Jimmy Tarbuck, Bruce Forsyth," agrees Martin, tongue-in-cheek, but Audrey expects great things. Gail warns her not to make Alf jealous. "He won't even notice. He'll be too busy looking for the Roly-Poly's," Audrey laughs. Raquel reminds Ken of their appointment the next day. "Ah, yes-the French lesson! I'll rephrase that-the personal tuition," he chuckles. "What exactly do you mean?" asks Des archly. "Oh, it's just his filthy mind," she tells Ken, " and if you must know," she turns to Des, "Ken is teaching me to develop my linguistics." "Oh, aye? I've heard he's very good at that!" But Raquel is annoyed at Des for being 'smutty.' As Ken leaves, she tells him not to eat his tea, as she's going to bring refreshments. "Are you on tablets, or what?" Des laughs at Ken, who tells her there's no need-but she insists, as it's a thank you. "You won't take any money, so how else can I repay you?" Des is still sniggering into his beer, and when she says she'll lay on something French, Des chokes on it! A little knowledge is a dangerous thing for Raquel!

In the cottage at the Lakes, Kevin is building up the fire, as Sally arrives from down the hall in her nightie, and bedsocks. She wants him to close the curtains, as it's more cosy, although Kevin thinks it's not necessary, because there's no one to look inside. She thinks that they should go on holiday more often, as it doesn't have to cost a lot of money. "Not when you've got the use of a free cottage, it doesn't," says Kevin, as he draws the curtains. Sally says they could rent a tent or a caravan, for economy, as she snuggles by the fire. Kevin joins her, and agrees-more holidays, despite Baldwin! She reminds him of his promise. No reminders of Weatherfield! They're in each other's arms, when they hear a car on the gravel outside. When Kevin looks, it's Joe Broughton, who wasn't due until the end of the next week. Sally quickly pulls on Kevin's jeans. They hope he's on his way to somewhere else, but no. He's managed to wangle some time off work, and is there to stay. Sally goes for more blankets, while Joe goes to look in on Jonathan. Kevin just looks fed up. Goodbye to the second honeymoon, little lovebirds-three's a crowd!

Steve is opening the door at Number 11, and stands aside to allow Liz to enter. "It's me Mum," he calls to Jim, and is off to his room upstairs. Liz tells him to come and visit, anytime, and he says yeah, but not with any enthusiasm, as he climbs the stairs. Jim welcomes her, and tells her it's a nice surprise, and offers tea, but she's only come to apologise for not phoning. He tells her it's all right, and that he's sorry not to have seen her when he called round at the Queen's. "You met Colin, I hear," Liz opens the encounter. "Yes, we had a wee chat," agrees Jim, and Liz tells him, "Thanks." When he asks what for, she acknowledges that it can't have been easy for him. "You mean thank you for not sticking one on him? Well, I'd be a liar if I said I wasn't tempted, love," he shamefacedly responds, and she tells him, she knows. But she needn't worry, as he has himself in hand-he hasn't had a drink for three days. "That's good," she says, gently, and he asks her if it's serious between her and Colin. "That's irrelevant," she replies, to his confusion. "Our problems are nothing to do with me and Colin, so it's best not to kid yourself," she explains. "I see. So I'm not forgiven yet, am I?" Jim believes, but to Liz, that's old history. She's been making her own decisions, being responsible for running a business, and finding that she CAN do it, and enjoying it. "So what about Colin?" Jim asks, but she tells him it's no big deal.

"Liz-you know I love you, and I'll be here waiting for you, you know that," he pleads, to her distress, but to her there's no point to that, they'd be fooling themselves. "I'm a changed man! It's for good this time! You must believe that," he begs her, and, "I do," she cries, "but the trouble is, I've changed as well," and she turns to leave, saying, "I'm sorry." Jim asks her to stay, but she has a taxi waiting, and calls up to remind Steve that he can come round at any time, and the door closes behind her. Jim stands perplexed in the living room. It looks as if he has a long hard furrow to plough, before he reaches his goal of reconciliation, if indeed, he ever will.

Ruth Hempsey

Brendan Scott - MILTON JOHNS Nicky Platt - WARREN JACKSON Jonathan Broughton - TOM LEWIS Rosie Webster - EMMA COLLINGE Joe Broughton - JOHN WHEATLEY
Written by - PHIL WOODS Directed by - EUGENE FERGUSON Lake Scenes Directed by - MERVYN CUMMING

Tuesday (3582, Wednesday 18 August 1993)

It is morning at the McDonald's. The boys and their old man are all together again now that Steve has beaten a hasty retreat from the Queen's. The lads have a bicker over who has made the most promising career choice with Steve sneering at Andy's shelf stacking efforts. Jim explodes at them and tells them to drop it. He is not a happy camper this morning as the full realization that Liz and Colin are involved has started to sink in. Jim rants on about how he has worked all his life and how it has got him nowhere. What's he doing? What's the point etc. Steve rolls his eyes. "Not this again!" Andy agrees. He reminds Jim that yesterday he was all set to move on with the rest of his life. "And what do you think the rest of my life will be like without your mother!" Jim despairs.

At the lakeside cottage (which is really very nice - must have cost Joe a few bob) the Websters and Broughtons are packing the car for a picnic. As Joe goes to lock up, Sally surveys the scene. "It's a different world up here." Kevin says he wishes they had it to themselves. "Well we can hardly tell Joe that" says Sally, "we wouldn't be up here if it wasn't for him." Mmm, Kevin looks thoughtful.as he closes the boot/trunk.

Raquel enters the corner store, wearing a very short mini skirt of almost 60's proportions. Emily (who suits the mob cap far better than Deirdre) asks what she can do for her. Raquel says she isn't sure. She might have to go into town but she thought she'd try Scott's first. Brendan turns from his shelf stacking and does a fair imitation of Uriah Heap greasing his hands together as he tells Raquel "We do pride ourselves on our extensive range of products for all occasions." He offers pasta but Raquel tells him it has to be French food. She explains she is cooking Ken a meal as a thank you for his help with French conversation. The first course is 'coq au vin' and Mr. Scott compliments her on her choice. In tones as greasy as a goose's liver he suggests pate for starters. Raquel thinks this is a better idea than the escargots she had been contemplating.

The picnic party are viewing the lakeside scenery. There is a pretty view with mountains in the background. I didn't notice the regulation Kodak 'take a photo here' notice but Kevin proposes a photo anyway and arranges the rest of the group for a snap. It would seem he is trying to get the view in the photo but from the angle we saw he is probably going to find those two hiking extras blocking the view when he gets his photos back from Boots!

At Lytham St. Anne's, Audrey and Alf are at the nineteenth hole with their new friends Norma and Les Bradbury who are older than Audrey by some years. Alf is at the bar with Les while Audrey listens to Norma tell her that it doesn't matter that she is a novice golfer. "No one in our age group takes it very seriously. They're a grand bunch the seniors." Audrey face is fixed in a smile but her eyes show the growing realization that this new 'friend' considers her a senior too. RAudrey is not ready for this! Alf and Les join them. Les Bradbury tells them that they are quite a few people from the retail trade in the club and Alf and Audrey are just the sort of members they want. Audrey enquires through fixed teeth "There must be a waiting list surely?" "Oh there are ways and means - if we really want you. We need more couples. That's what retirement is for - to spend more time together. Golf is a wonderful sport for husbands and wives to do together and then there's bridge . . ." Audrey is screaming inside. She will be buried alive! This isn't what she thought retirement was going to be like!

At the Queen's it's locking up time after lunch. Colin shows the last customer out and then cosies up to Liz who is drying glasses behind the bar. He suggests that he goes upstairs and puts the kettle on. "Nothing like making yourself at home," says Liz. Colin agrees and goes off to make tea. This exchange is not overlooked by Tanya who comments "Glad to see someone is happy in their work." Liz tells her "Although you may not approve, it's my life." Tanya replies if it's all over between her and Jim well good luck to her. Liz tells her it is and what's more she is starting to enjoy her life again.

Outside the corner shop Nicky is wrestling with the delivery bike. Mark is cleaning a car across the way. Nick tells him what a swine Mr. Scott is, always having a go at him. Nicky feels like telling Brendan where to stick it but Mark tells him it will be worth it on pay day. They arrange to meet on the rec. after work. The slave-driver emerges from his shop at that point and has another go at Nicky for not getting on with the job. "I'm going" says Nick. "Going? You should be half-way back by now!"

A phone is ringing in Grasmere Drive and Alf rushes to answer it but is too late. He tells Audrey she should have opened the door faster! Audrey is not happy. Alf wants to know why she has been so quiet all the way home. "Well it was hardly an unqualified success." Alf thinks she is referring to the golf game and tells her they'll get better the more they play. As far as Alf is concern it's all just hunky dory. Nice new friends, nice surroundings and something they can do together - it couldn't have worked out better. Audrey tells him as far as she's concerned it couldn't have been a bigger disaster!

Back at the emporium the date is 1840 something. Or so it seems as Brendan goes into full Dickensian mode and shamelessly exploits his errant errandboy. Nicky is told that he will not be paid the 6.5 hrs he is expecting as Mr. Scott perceives he has spent far too much time gossiping and lollygagging. Emily tries to defend Nicky but is curtly told to keep her nose out. Brendan will pay for 4 hrs work and tells Nicky that this is quite generous under the circumstances. Nicky plays his own Dickensian hand as the plucky Oliver standing up to unjust authoritarianism. "That's not fair. I worked more than that!" Mr. Scrooge tells Nicky that's all he's getting and he should consider himself lucky to still have a job. "Lucky! To be working for you? I'm not working for nothing!" The final straw for Scrooge, "Then there's nothing more to be said. I'll get your money." "You mean you're sacking me?" "Exactly!" Nicky exhales a sigh of relief. He can return to 1993.

At Grasmere Drive, Audrey is sitting pensively on the couch. Alf wants to know what they are going to do that evening. Audrey doesn't feel like cooking. The phone rings and the estate agent tells Alf there is an offer on their house. Alf beams, "tell them we accept." He hugs Audrey. "We're on our way!" Audrey looks less than thrilled.

In the Lakes the picnic party returns to the cottage. Kevin says he could murder a pint and Sally suggests he and Joe go to the pub while she gets the evening meal. This they are happy to do. "Not longer than an hour mind. 'Cos I'm putting a pie on."

Chez Barlow, Raquel is busy at the stove. For some reason she is wearing gift wrap streamers in her hair. (Or that's what it looks like any road. Was this a Brit fashion in the early nineties? Or is she done up like a Xmas prezzie for Ken?) Ken wants to know if there is any thing he can do. She suggests he sees to the wine. After he corrects her pronunciation of Cabernet Sauvignon she thanks him for letting her use his kitchen. She is really enjoying cooking and has even got a little "Tricolore" from the cheese shop. They are going to practise speaking in French during the meal. Ken assures her everything is perfect and goes to find the wine. Raquel has put the red Cabernet in the fridge. Ken smiles to himself.

In the Lake District pub Kevin is getting pissed. Joe mentions the time but Kevin is in no mood to leave. Joe senses Kevin has a problem and wants to know if it's to do with him or the cottage. Kev denies either. "But there is a problem? Joe persists. "Just a little one." Kevin responds. He tells Joe about the pending court case on a charge of conspiring to pervert the course of justice. A letter arrived the day they came away. The court date is in November. "Have you told Sally?" Kevin admits not. How can he ruin her holiday? Yes there is a problem he tells Joe. "And you're looking at him".

In the Rovers, Betty has heard about Nicky's run in with Brendan Scott. She tells Gail it's probably for the best. Scott doesn't seem to be a very nice man to work for. That's what Martin said but Gail disagrees. She tells Betty she doesn't want her child exploited but at the same time a bit of discipline would be good for him. "It never did me any harm" says Gail. (LOL What sort of discipline would she have got from Audrey?!!)

Sally hears Kevin and Joe return. She jumps up from the sofa wanting to know where they have been for the past few hours. Also why is Kevin so drunk. Kevin is in denial mode. Joe makes an ineffectual apology. Joe is not drunk. (How come?) Kevin drops onto the sofa but Sally tells him he can't stay there. Joe suggests they get him to bed. (What's this we white man?) You get him to bed says Sally to Joe. You got him into this state. Joe sighs and pulls Kevin off the couch. Kevin doesn't want to get his head down. "I want a curry.' he mumbles. Sally is disgusted at this laddish behaviour.

After dinner at Chez Barlow, Ken is feeling mellow. He thanks Raquel for the meal and tells her he is amazed as he didn't realize just how much French she had picked up. She tells him that she can learn things if she's interested in them but the teachers at school made everything so boring. She tells him she probably would have gone to university if he'd been teaching her! Ken is demure, "Oh, I don't know about that" "Oh well of course you have to have some brains." says Raquel. Ken realizes what he just said and tries to backtrack but Raquel smooths it over. "It wouldn't do for us all to be blessed the same way. I bet there's a lot of brainy women who'd give their eye teeth to be a model." Ken suggests coffee but Raquel suggests they finish the wine. She tells Ken she has really enjoyed the evening because he doesn't talk about football or cricket like the others. They only want one thing but Ken makes he feel important. They toast wine glasses. The look on Ken's face is half embarrassment half bemusement. He is wondering if Raquel is coming on to him. He's not sure. (Is this a rare Corrie scene in which the imbibing of red wine does not lead to hanky panky?)

At Grasmere Drive, Alf and Audrey return from dinner out. It has not gone well. Alf wants to know what is wrong. Audrey agrees they have to talk. She tells him she is having second thoughts about moving to St. Annes - or anywhere else for that matter. Having seen how all the retired couples are doing everything together she tells him she isn't ready for that type of life. But that's what we retired for Alf protests. He tells her it was her idea to go Lytham so she'd better get used to it!

Outside the cottage, Joe is sitting by the water. Sally joins him and tells him the kids are sound asleep. And Kevin? He's snoring his head off confirms Sally. She wonders why Kevin got drunk. Joe tells her Kevin has things on his mind. Sally prods him to tell her what but Joe says if Kevin wanted her to know he would have told her and he obviously doesn't. And then - with the kids in bed and the husband dead drunk - the move you've all seen coming for the past few weeks - "Why do you stick with him Sal?" Sally doesn't think she's heard right. "What did you say?" "Why are you wasting your life on someone like Kevin?" "I can't believe I'm hearing this." Sally is incredulous. Joe tells her Kevin will never amount to anything. He'll always be working in a tin-pot back street garage. Joe tells her Kevin is a loser (what a prophet!) and asks her where she will be in five, ten twenty years time if she sticks with Kevin. "He's not a loser" says Sally and tells Joe "That's enough, I won't listen to this!" She makes to leave but he grabs her arms and tells her he could give her a better life than Kevin. She tries to break free and angrily tells him that Kevin is her husband and whatever he is she loves him. Joe tells her they'd be good for each other. He's felt this way ever since he met her and he begs her to consider what she is doing with her life. "You deserve better" he tells her as the credits roll.

Libby Seekings

Norma Bradbury OLIVE PENDLETON Les Bradbury VINCENT WORTH
Written by BARRY HILL Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON Lakes' Scenes Directed by MELVYN CUMMING

Wednesday (3583, Friday 20 August 1993)

We begin in the corner shop, with Brendan Scott reeling off a grocery order to a harassed looking Emily, who is gathering the items in a basket. Brendan pops into the back to get egg noodles. Betty wants to know if anyone is going to serve her, as she's getting her hair done in 15 minutes. Emily apologizes. "He's fired Nicky Platt and...", but at that moment Brendan returns and scores two points by throwing the packet of egg noodles into the basket.

Over at Des' place, Colin comes downstairs and asks an ironing Phyllis where his jeans are. As he rummages through the laundry basket, Phyllis comments that "it's a poor bloke who doesn't remember where he's left his pants", then tosses him his jeans. As he's going back upstairs, she can't resist adding, "'cause you never slept in that bed, did ya? You picked the wrong one with Jim MacDonald". "Never laid a finger on him, Phyllis", Colin shoots back as he bounds up the stairs, leaving an irked Phyllis behind.

Flash to the Webster holiday, where three is now definitely a crowd. Sally is getting Rosie ready to go out when Joe appears. There's a long, uncomfortable silence as Joe hands her one of Rosie's shoes. She takes it, and continues to talk to Rosie as if Joe isn't there.

At the cafe, Nicky is trying to hit Gail up for some dosh, and instead gets a lecture about everyone having to work with nutters but putting up with it -- for the money. Phyllis enters and spies Jim MacDonald working on a crossword. "For years, I thought my sister were gifted", she begins. "If she got stuck wi' crosswords, she'd say, ooh, I don't remember the answer, but the fairies will come tonight and whisper it to me. What I didn't know is that they put t' solution in the paper the next day", she laughs. Jim gets up to leave, and who should he bump into on the way out but Colin, who looks like his pants will have to be laundered again. Colin recovers quickly and orders some coffee. "You alright, gorgeous?" he shouts to Phyllis, who rolls her eyes and mouthes something to Gail (unfortunately, lip reading isn't one of my strong points).

Back to the cottage, where Sally is outside wiping Rosie's face. "I want to talk to you", says Joe, approaching her from behind, but Sally ignores him again and continues to focus on Rosie. Finally she acknowledges his presence. With her back still to him, she suggests that they forget everything that was said the night before. "You feel silly, and I feel silly, and let's just forget everything that was said." "You think I was drunk", Joe says. Sally pretends that she doesn't hear him and replies, "I'm taking Rosie down to the lake. Do you want me to take Jonathon?" "I meant what I said", Joe says quickly, but he's clearly fighting a losing battle. "Will you stop it!" Sally snaps at him. They both turn as Kevin comes out of the cottage wearing a blue bathrobe and slippers (and perhaps nothing else?). "Oh god, what time is it?" he asks, rubbing his face and oblivious to the tension in the air. "We're going out", Sally says. "Do you want to come Jonathon?" "Where?", Jonathon shouts. "Just out!" Sally snaps again, clearly wanting to just get away. Kevin assumes it's because of his night of drinking.

Back to Walton's mountain, where Brendan is heading out to make his first round of deliveries for the day. Emily comments that dozens of kids would like the job of delivery boy, but Brendan doesn't want to know. "What will I do if I'm trying to serve and a delivery arrives?" asks Emily, concerned about being left alone in the shop. "Use your resources", a frustrated Brendan suggests, adding, "dear god, it's like the village of the damned." Raquel comes into the shop and cheerfully says, "Hi Emily, bonjour". "No one around here is even halfway normal" is Brendan's comment. This upsets Emily, who reminds him that she is only filling in for Deirdre and can walk out at any time. Brendan begins a story about how, when was was working at Bettabuys, he showed workers who were threatening strike action that they could indeed perform their tasks in the time allotted to them by management. "And it resolved the strike?" an impressed Emily asks. "Er, no. The strike went on for a considerable time, but with every man knowing that Brendan Scott is not a man to tolerate blackmail or gibberish!" Emily reminds him that Nicky is only a schoolboy, but Brendan maintains that it's the principle of the thing. He intends to show how simple a job being a delivery boy is. "He's only going up Rosamund Street", Emily says to Raquel as Brendan leaves the shop. They both go out onto the street to watch him ride off. And quite an audience he has on his way too, as he passes Andy and Amy, and Vera, who is pushing Tommy, and has quite a laugh as Brendan rolls by.

To the cottage again, where Kevin is in the bathroom freshening up. Joe says he's going down to the shops. "I better go and find Sally before she divorces me", says Kevin, but Joe, wanting another chance with Sally alone, tells Kevin to stick the kettle on and says he's only popping out to get some milk and will be back in a few minutes. "Okay", Kevin says to the bathroom mirror, feeling like he has no say in the plan.

Des orders lunch at the Rovers, for him and for Phyllis. "You're not buying Phyllis' lunch again, are ya?" a disgusted Betty asks. But Des has Phyllis' number. "It's a little scam, you see. She starts cleaning later and later until she knows I'll be in here." "You want to tell her. It's costing you, you know", Betty tells him. But Des reckons he's getting his money's worth, and says he just smears the microwave with bacon fat when Phyllis starts clinging, which earns him a laugh from Betty. "I don't see your brother about", she says. "He's busy", Des says, with a quick look at Andy, who's propping up the bar beside him.

Don Brennan comes into the cafe for lunch and is cornered by Denise. "Going up to Coronation Street?", she asks. "In 15 minutes, after my lunch", is the reply. "Aren't you working?" he asks. "Pensioner's Bargain Day" is what Denise is avoiding. He orders a special. Gail shouts "coming up" and continues talking to Alf, who is at the counter. He mentions that Audrey is getting a bit jittery about the house sale but it's excitement, really. Gail comments that it's a big step and he has to be absolutely sure, which he is, saying how grand Lytham is. Concerning Audrey, he says, "if you see her, tell her I'm looking for her", and then leaves. He isn't gone two seconds when Gail rushes over to the door leading to the toilets and opens it, revealing a very upset and sniffling Audrey. She tells Audrey that she'll have to talk to Alf about it, but Audrey is convinced that Alf can't see past his own nose. She's frightened about spending 12 hours a day with Alf. "I don't know what to talk to him about. When we talked in the shop, we talked about fish prices. We never got down to basics. What I'm really dreading is him sitting me down and giving me his life story, cause they do that, you know, when they're retired, looking back like they're winding down. It's so boring", she chokes out, on the verge of breaking down. A discussion about cemeteries and pre-arranged funerals ensues, with Audrey looking her mortality right in the face. "It's your fault, you started it", says Gail, fed up with all the moaning.

Back at the Rovers, Gordon tries to catch Raquel's attention. "Une moment, s'il vous plait", she smiles. Phyllis and Des discuss Colin. Phyllis tells Des she had a go at Colin that morning. Des worries that Colin hasn't mended his ways. Switch to a discussion at the bar where Steve is entertaining Andy, Amy, and Jim with a story about Baldwin and a t-shirt order. Amy is interested in how Steve gets the shirts for half the whole sale price. After the explanation, Andy comments about the difference between them, he being a struggling student, and Steve being the young entrepreneur. "Who's the mug?" asks Steve, and then says to Amy, "if you ever get bored with him groveling off the state, there's an alternative". Andy is not amused.

Down at the lake, a fellow cottager and mother watches over Rosie and Jonathon, giving Sally some time alone to sit on the rocks and contemplate her situation. Until Joe arrives and sits behind her. He repeats that he wasn't drunk, and doesn't feel silly, just embarrassed. "I know that I love you. I've spent the last few months trying to prove that I'm not mistaken." He rambles on about his feelings for her while Sally continues to stare ahead. There's a long silence. Then Sally asks, "when did you plan all this? This cottage. Getting us up here. Telling me I'm married to a waste of time." "I didn't plan that", Joe says. "Well, yes I did. I just wanted to spend some time with you". Joe then puts Kevin down, calling him "a mechanic provider and small time crook". This gets Sally's attention. She turns to him and asks him what he means. But Joe has his own agenda, and instead of answering Sally's question, tells her that he knows she married Kevin because she "got stuck in the Weatherfield whirlpool. Grow up, get married, have kids, Weatherfield that never looks beyond the M62. I just don't think you're happy." "That's where you're wrong", Sally says. "I didn't get trapped. I picked that life because that's what I wanted. Kevin is what I wanted." "Because you've never known any better", Joe protests. "And this is better?" Sally softly asks. "Doing this to me? This is a terrible thing to do to me". She turns away, upset. Just then, fellow cottager and mom brings Rosie over. "She wants to show this to her dad", she says, stopping by Joe, referring to the fish that Rosie has in a bucket of water. She quickly realizes that she's interrupted an intense discussion when Joe and Sally both stare back at her, wordlessly.

Brendan returns from his first round of deliveries looking quite winded. Ken pops in to leave a key to the flat. A carpenter is going to come by to repair the bathroom window "at my expense", he assures Brendan. Emily is concerned with the way Brendan looks and suggests that he not go back out on the bike. But Brendan tells her that he invested all of his redundancy money into the shop and promised improved service, and he intends to deliver on that promise. He agrees to have a sandwich before going out again, and Emily disappears into the back to make him one as he uses a cloth to wipe the sweat from his face and neck.

At the pub again, Andy has words with Steve about Steve's earlier wisecrack. Amy discusses Liz with Jim. "It's all about Liz wanting independence", she says, "which threatens a lot of blokes". Saying she might be on dangerous ground, she tells Jim that sometimes "when a bust-up occurs, people pretend things were a lot more solid than they were". Jim listens thoughtfully. Alf and Don are propping up the bar. Don tells Alf that he wouldn't live his life on a timetable. "I'd sooner let life chuck a few surprises at me". Alf thinks Don is jealous of his retirement. Cue macho Gordon, who has his knickers in a knot because Raquel cooked a meal for Ken. "Less than a century ago I could have had him shot in the back for that", Gordon fumes. This riles Raquel. "Who do you think you're making insinuations about? It's worse than being in the Weatherfield nick". She reminds him, quite loudly, that the only reason she's learning French is so she won't look stupid when she's on holiday with his mates. The heated discussion deteriorates into an all out shouting match. Raquel gets in the last shot by telling Gordon that he can "tell his ponce mates to bug off! In English!" She turns away from him to discover that they're the pub's afternoon entertainment, and rushes into the back in a huff.

Sally returns to the cottage. Kevin is waiting outside and demands to know where Joe is. He attempts to apologize to Sally and says he'll make it up to her, but Sally has other things on her mind and tells him she wants to go back to Weatherfield, complaining that she's always stuck with the kids. Joe returns as she's telling Kevin that she doesn't like it at the cottage and wants to go home. Kevin turns his anger on Joe and wants to know where he got to and where the milk is. "Look, I'm sorry, this is all my fault", says Joe. "What are you talking about?" asks Kevin, as Sally storms into the cottage. Joe tells Kevin that he shouldn't have encouraged him to drink. Kevin says it was his fault, and still being in the dark, says he's blown it and "Sally's packing to go home". This upsets Joe. Kevin says, "my fault, my problem", and asks Joe to watch the kids while he goes inside to talk to Sally.

At the MacDonald home, Andy invites Jim out for a meal with him and Amy. Jim says no because he has lots to do, but Andy talks him into it. Jim tells Andy that Amy is a nice girl and he should look after her.

Des returns home and summons Colin from the back garden. A very pale Colin comes in and says he's been tanning (he didn't have much luck!). He says Des should grab some rays as he looks like he needs some. "that's down to you", retorts Des, which kicks off an argument. "They barely split up and you're in there. She didn't have time to think about it properly". "I think that's her decision, don't you?" says Colin as he leaves the kitchen for the living room. Des follows him in. "You've always been the same. Every situation you get into, you're never a part of it. You're just a big kid". This doesn't go down well with Colin. "Look who's talking. You married that Steph, who no one could stand the sight of. She made an absolute fool of you. Did I go on about it? You pinched another bloke's wife and bairn while he was still in the nick... you're a saint who pulls his morals out of a bag when it suits him... you talk about me bringing it on your doorstep, when you are living across the road from your dead bird's ex's parents. It stinks more than any mess I'll ever get myself into!" "I think it's time you disappeared, don't you", says Des, as he disappears up the stairs.

Betty tries to convince Raquel to make it up with Gordon, but Raquel isn't interested.

After another round of deliveries, Brendan returns to the shop in worse shape than he was the first time, and is met by Gail, who isn't shouting the odds, but calmly explains that Nicky thinks he was underpaid by 90p. "Give her a £1", Brendan gasps weakly to Emily, surprising Gail, who then feels a bit guilty. Ken arrives and inquires about the carpenter. He did show up, but Brendan had taken the key to the flat with him on his deliveries. Ken says he wouldn't care but he's offering to pay for the damn thing and asks for his key back, holding out his hand for it. But a visibly winded and distressed Brendan seems unable to respond and suddenly collapses, his hat skidding across the floor. "Ring an ambulance", shouts Emily. "Ken, get Martin", yells Gail, as she rushes into the back to dial 999. Emily rolls Brendan over as Gail asks for an ambulance. "I think it's a heart attack", Emily says, as she loosens Brendan's tie. "It's a heart attack. 15 Coronation Street, Weatherfield. Can you come quickly?", a stunned Gail says into the phone.

Back in a calmer place, Kevin is bathing the kids. Sally goes outside to fetch some towels that are drying, and Joe intercepts her. "Kevin doesn't believe you want to go home just because he got plastered". "So!", Sally retorts. "What are you going to tell him?", Joe asks, perhaps trying to stir things up. "I haven't decided yet". Sally tells him to find someone else to mind Jonathon, but Joe doesn't want Sally to "take it out on him" and says he'll arrange for someone else to drop off and pick up Jonathon. "You need the money", he says. "What, you're a charity now, are you?" says Sally. "I don't need the money that much." Joe says he'll leave the cottage that night and tells her to finish the holiday. He apologizes for upsetting her but says he had to say it. Kevin calls for the towels, and Joe takes them in. He tells Kevin that he's been called back to work and that Sally has decided to stay, and leaves to get his things together. Sally comes and leans in the bathroom doorway. Kevin, who still believes it's all down to him, promises her again that he'll make it up to her.

Back at the shop, Martin is administering CPR to Brendan while Gail, Emily, and Ken look on anxiously. The paramedics arrive, and Martin tells them "we've been struggling with him for 10 minutes and not a peep". The paramedics try to shock his heart alive, but to no avail. Brendan Scott is dead.

In the Rovers, Alf has finally found Audrey and is wondering where she was. He had to cancel the appointment with the solicitor because he couldn't find her. Vera rushes into the pub, after performing a very contrived double take, and shouts that there's an ambulance on the street in front of the corner shop. The pub empties and a somber crowd watches as Brendan Scott is loaded into the ambulance. Don rushes up the street. "What is it, love?" he asks Gail. "It's Brendan. He's died". The ambulance pulls away and the crowd disperses, leaving Emily alone in front of the shop. She slowly pulls off her cap. As the closing music begins, she enters the shop and closes the door behind her. She flips the "Open" sign to "Closed", and then the lights in the shop go out.

R.I.P. Brendan Scott.

Sarah Ettritch

Brendan Scott - MILTON JOHNS Nicky Platt - WARREN JACKSON Jonathon Broughton - TOM LEWIS Rosie Webster - EMMA COLLINGE Joe Broughton - JOHN WHEATLEY Tommy Duckworth - DARRYL EDWARDS Gordon Blinkhorn - MARK CHATTERTON Young Mother - GILLIAN WAUGH
Written by PAUL ABBOTT Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON Lake scenes Directed by MERVYN CUMMING

Thursday (3584, Monday 23 August 1993)

Day dawns at the Roberts'. Not much interesting dialogue as Alf and Audrey bicker over the move to Lytham. Or rather Alf's move to Lytham because Audrey isn't going.

In the Kabin Mavis, Rita and a very tanned Deirdre discuss the demise of Brandon Scott. Deirdre tells them the shop will remain shut until Mrs. Scott decides what she wants to do. Mave digs out a sign reading 'Closed for Bereavement' and gives it to Deirdre to hang on the shop door.

At Des' Phyllis is going to hang out the wash; she tells Des he should train Colin to do the washing up. Colin (who lately has been sporting a rather cheesy 1950's hair-do, i.e. heavy usage of Brylcreem) storms in to the kitchen and slaps some money on the table informing Des its for 'phone, food and Phyllis'. He announces he's moving out and going to stay at the Queens (I'm assuming he means Liz's pub not Buckingham Palace). Des reminds Colin that Jim and Liz are pals of his and he doesn't want any Colin-induced grief from either of them. He also tells Colin he will no longer cover for him with Janice (Colin's 'girlfriend' in Hartlepool that he's been trying to avoid). Colin shrugs off any hint of trouble from Jim or Liz and tells Des he'll write a letter to Janice. That bridge burnt he huffs off to the Queens.

In the shut shop Deirdre and Emily work out all the things that need doing. Deirdre has been unable to reach Mrs. Scott so she's unsure as to what they should do. Percy knocks on the door and offers his assistance. E & D tell him everything's under control but it was nice of him to offer. Percy looks at the spot on the floor where Brendan offed-it and says how fitting it was that he 'died with his boots on, on the battlefield so to speak'.

We now join the Webster's on holiday. Kevin and Sally are sitting watching the kids playing. Kev apologizes for his behaviour the night before. No more drinking he promises, just shandy from now on. (Hmmmso that must be Sally's giant can of Foster's Lager on the picnic table). Sally wonders aloud if Gail and the kids would like to join them but Kevin says he likes it being just them. Leaving Weatherfield and all it's problems behind. "And what problems do you have Kevin?" asks Sally "Money?" Kevin wriggles out of answering as Sally smirks at him.

Audrey enters the café whining about Alf to Gail. She's as adamant about not going to Lytham as Alf is about moving. She's decided now that she can't move away from Gail, the grandkids and all her friends. (This never occurred to her before?). She asks Gail if she would have a word to Alf for her. Gail, with a rare display of rational behaviour, tells Audrey they have to work it out between themselves!! (What?? You mean she shouldn't just tell Alf they'll do it her way and that's that?).

Alf turns up at the shop to offer his assistance to Deirdre and Emily. He's told the same as Percy was, thanks but all under control. He's less than impressed that they are shutting the shop until further notice. What will happen to all the perishable stock? Emily tells him there are more important things to worry about at the moment than a few overripe plums. Deirdre asks Alf if it had been him would he have expected Audrey to keep the place open? Alf doesn't see the point in turning away custom and also he's just thinking about Mrs. Scott's income. She'll probably need every penny right now. "Well, if it was left to me I'd close until dinner time as a mark of respect," declares Alf. "And stay open late to make up for lost trade?" retorts Emily. Alf doesn't actually dispute this comment!

In the Rovers Jack, pulling a pint for Don, reckons he's 'quids in' now that Brendan's dead as Jack still owed him £60 which he's unlikely to have to pay back!

On the other side of the bar Raquel is bummed because she is missing out on the trip to France. She thinks right now she should be "sitting on a pavement with a glass of 'vin ordinaire' and eating a Croque Monsieur". (All right!! Cheap wine and a grilled cheese sandwich - sounds like lunch at my place). Betty's surprised that Raquel packed it in with Gordon, as he seemed so nice. Raquel agrees but says she can't be doing with jealous men.

Over at the Queens Colin has yet to arrive and Liz and Tanya speculate over where he could be. Liz thinks perhaps he's poorly but Tanya, being the optimistic little ray of sunshine that she is, reckons he's gone back to sea. Liz thinks not but Tanya assures her it's what blokes like him do! Just then Colin arrives. He must have crawled from Des' as it was 10 past 9 when he left there and now it's noon or maybe he was slowed down by the weight of all his worldly possessions in his duffle bag and a head full of Brylcreem. Anyway, he's here now and ready to shift in. One problem. He's not cleared this with Liz and she's less than thrilled with the idea and tells him so. Colin has a whine and a pout over being denied anything more than occasional access to Liz. If Liz notices she doesn't let on just tells him they've got work to do.

At the garage newly-unemployed Nicky sulks and Mark goes to buy him an ice cream to cheer him up. Jim offers him a few quid if he'll run a fetch some spares then tidy up the garage. This cheers Nicky up.

More bickering at Grassmere Drive. Alf: I'm moving to Lytham and so are you. Audrey: No I'm not. Alf: Yes you are. Audrey: No I'm not. Repeat ad infinitum.

At the lake Sally tells Kev she wants them to try for another baby. Kevin argues that they can't afford it. Sally replies that if they leave it too long it will be too late. (Makes sense in a Yogi Berra sort of way). She assures him they can manage, she'll keep working as a childminder and she can water down the spaghetti hoops. Kev doesn't think she'll be able to manage with 3 toddlers and a baby (I'm with Kev, I have one reasonably well-behaved 3 yr old and still require cheap wine at lunch). Sally sees through Kevin's excuses and asks him for the REAL reason he doesn't want another baby. Kevin responds by storming off in a huff!

In the snug in the Rovers, Emily is telling Mavis and Derek she's going on a 'Painting for Beginners' holiday. Mave enthuses over the holiday brochure pointing out to Derek all the courses they could take like painting or pottery. Derek dismisses it all as "too exciting".

At the bar Jack is telling a joke to Curly and Raquel. Curly laughs at the punch line while it cruises over Raquel's head. Raquel declares they shouldn't be making jokes at a time like this, what with all the business about Brandon. Curly says there's not much you can do about death. He and Raquel discuss sending flowers for the funeral and are overheard by Angie. Angie butts in saying she can't imagine Reg Holdsworth shedding any tears over Brandon but imagines he'll put on a good show for appearances sake. "Ooh we are cynical tonight aren't we Angela. Not more man trouble is it?" sneers Raquel. "Funny, I thought you were supposed to be in France!" replies Angie. Meow!! (I love these two). Angie: 1, Raquel: 0!

Cut to Des watching footy on the telly and shovelling in a takeaway straight from the foil container. There's a knock at the door. Hmmm.wonder who that could be? It's Colin, the errant brother, returned with his tail between his legs having been rebuffed by Liz. He attempts to be humble and asks if he can stay a few more nights at Des'. Des relents, of course, and says that Colin is giving his reputation a run for its money! He's supposed to be the wild boy and Colin is making him look like a hermit!

Kev rolls in at the cottage having walked several miles to the pub in the village. Sally has been waiting up for him. He tells her he does want another baby but thinks they should have a stable home to be born into. "But I love you Kevin. I'd never do anything to hurt you, I mean don't you trust me?" asks Sally. ("At least not for a few more years" snorts my Husband from the kitchen. LOL! This is the same hubby who claims to not watch Street yet has an amazing grasp of Street storylines both past and present.) "You can trust me too, I'd never look at another woman" replies Kevin. (More snorting from The Husband). Kevin finally confesses all about the letter he received from court just before they left. He tells Sally that he's being charged with 'conspiring to pervert the course of justice' not some little traffic violation. He could get sent down for this. "Well, we could still have another baby," says Sally. (She's really NOT getting this, is she?) Kev spells it out for her, if she gets pregnant now he could be in jail when the baby is born.

Tammy Mitchell

Written by: PHIL WOODS Directed by: CHARLES LAUDER Lake Scenes Directed by: MERVYN CUMMING

Friday (3585, Wednesday 25 August 1993)

All Kevin wants to do is put the shadow of the court date behind him while he's still on holiday but all Sally wants to do is moan about it and worry about it. They argue but Kevin doesn't want to talk about it and spoil what's left of their holiday. Sally sulks and stalks away from the car (no outing then?) saying it's already spoilt.

Colin appears for breakfast. He's a bit brighter, having convinced himself that Liz was right not to rush into more of a commitment. Bemused, Des is skeptical when Colin says he's willing to wait for Liz, she's special but just needs a bit of time to sort herself out. He'll be patient, he vows, this one is for real. Yeah, Des grins, having heard that one before.

Audrey is dressed in a sharp white suit and burgundy blouse, ready to spend the day job hunting. Alf, of course, thinks it's all just a show for his benefit, just to argue the point. Audrey's adamant even when Alf insults her by saying she wouldn't even get a job as a char. Unfazed but fed up with his attitude, she leaves.

Mavis converses with Raquel about her French lessons, admiring Raquel for trying something new. She wishes she had done the same before her Parisian honeymoon! Rita of course adds her usual witty repartee and Ken bounces in for a newspaper. Before long, he is drawn into the conversation and Mavis ends up arranging a date for Ken and Raquel, an outing to a French restaurant so Raquel can have some practical experience. Ken looks blank but Raquel is up for it! She leaves and Rita scolds Mavis for sticking her nose in. Ken gives Mavis a "now look what you've lumbered me with" look before leaving, sighing rather heavily as he watches Raquel totter off down the road. Rather uncharacteristically of him if you ask me to act as if a date with a beautiful young blonde is a fate worse than death.

He turns and walks over to Jim to see when he can arrange an M.O.T. inspection for his car. Colin walks by and nearly staggers under the chill of Jim's heart stopping glare. Ken notices and is surprised to hear that Colin's been messing with Liz. He vehemently declares that men like that ought to be strung up (read: Baldwin, forgetting of course, that he could very easily be classed as one of those men as well!) Jim sensibly points out that though it wasn't Colin's fault that they split, he's probably spoiling their chances of getting back together.

Next scene is out behind Bettabuys were two chaps on their break are kicking a football and Andy and Amy are enjoying the sun while having a snack. There's a bit of small talk about their individual futures, Andy still having ambitions. Maureen floats over, noticing their affectionate gestures, suggests more wedding bells (planting the seed in Andy's mind no doubt). Maureen is just so happy these days and wants everyone else to be happy too! (I hate people like that, you know the kind that are born again marrieds/divorcees/parents/home owners etc. and insist everyone else ought to sign up for whatever cause they're crusading for)

Colin isn't too confident now as he approaches Liz, whining and wanting to know if she still wants him to keep working and what would she have done if he had just stayed away (i.e. wouldn't you be sorry if you rejected me and I never came back) Liz is strictly business, up to her neck in preparation for a Caribbean theme night and narks that she would have been pissed. . . er. . . annoyed if he hadn't shown up and left her short handed. He susses that he's been forgiven and with a twinkle in his eye goes about the tasks of the day.

In the pub, Angie has a face like a wet Wednesday, moaning about being put off men for good, not doing Des's ego any good. He suggests that they get together tonight for a Pity Party and bore each other to death moaning. (Well that's what it would be, this little plan to listen to each other's troubles!) Across the bar, Alf is moaning about Audrey's job search and has a righteous on about Audrey only wanting to dig her heels in although it sounds as if he's got his dug in just as firmly. Ken arrives and Rita makes apologies for Mavis dropping him in it earlier. He brushes it off, figuring that Raquel probably didn't take it seriously. His face seriously drops when Raquel calls across and asks, in French mainly for Angie's benefit, what time he's picking her up tonight. Again, Ken's face freezes in that caught-in-the-headlights expression he does when he wants to emote.

Back to the Lakes, Sally and Kevin have gone from bitching about the court case to mithering each other about that baby thing. Sally wants one and she wants one now and Kevin says the timing couldn't be worse. On and on and on and on. Kevin finally cuts it short (?!) and takes the kids for ice cream.

Audrey arrives home. Alf launches into a lecture about her faults, rejection and "I told you so's" until he's brought up short when she tells him she's got a job in a dress shop and starts tomorrow.

Sally is now lying on a lounger in shorts and a bikini top. Hearing footsteps behind her, she cheerfully chirps (as if she hasn't spent the better part of the morning and afternoon narking at Kevin) "That was quick". But it's not Kevin, it's Joe and she quickly pulls on a tshirt. He's not here to bring up all that stuff again though he meant what he said, he's here to pick up Johnathan to take him for a surprise visit to his granny. Having gained her sympathy temporarily he moves in but she is immediately on alert. He says he wants to find out if she'll still mind Johnathan, pushing the "poor motherless child" guilt button, Don't hold the sins of the father against the son, if it was a sin to tell you I love you" he slides into the conversation. She pushes him away and goes back inside.

Maureen is in Angie's flat, having another fitting for her dress. She's got pre wedding jitters, wanting so much for this marriage to work as she doesn't think she'll have another chance (have I got a story for her!) Angie is still gloomy, Maureen is optimistic and hopeful. Phyllis pops in for a peek at the nuptial dress and an oooh and an ah. She says she'd like something like it for her wedding. Angie laughs, she hasn't landed "him" yet has she? "No I 'aven't but I shall, perseverance pays you know!" she quickly retorts in brilliant timing!

We hear Kevin come in as Sally is telling Joe that she's not sure if she'll keep on minding the little boy. Kevin's pleased to see Joe but Sally gets a knot in her face when Kevin invites Joe to stay for a barbecue before he goes. Joe turns to Sally and says if it's ok with her he would love to. Since she can't say no without an explanation she tries to pretend it's fine.

Phyllis and Betty chat about Maureen's wedding and mature brides. Percy is of the opinion that anyone that gets married after 50 is a fool. Betty objects but the line of the day goes to Phyllis, "Is that why that Olive whatsis chucked yer?" LOL! As predicted, Des and Angie are boring each other and me senseless (where's me wine glass!) The pair of them are obviously floundering with no direction in their lives. (I could give them one, how about, "straight to hell in a handbasket? Good a direction as any I would think!) In a booth Mavis defends her actions while Rita accuses her of being to quick to open her little trap. Mavis points out that Ken is perfectly capable of saying no if he didn't want to go out with Raquel. Not he's not, apparently, as he's just arrived, wearing a suit and looking uncomfortable. Ken tries to give Raquel an out but she's looking forward to it and they leave, Raquel making sure she gets a parting shot in at Angie, by way of a change. ;)

Caribbean night is well underway and the Queens is buzzing with punters and reggae music. Liz finally has a smile for Colin. Guess she's sliding under the limbo pole tonight!

Ken and Raquel are seated in a nice restaurant. Raquel has an attack of nerves but does passably well ordering from the menu. She's chagrinned when Ken, ordering the wine, elicits a response from the Marseille-born waiter who speaks very good English. Ah but that wasn't the object of the exercise, Ken grins. He urges Raquel to go to France on her own but she reveals that she doesn't have any confidence in herself, inspiring him to a rousing pep talk in his best teacher's voice. She's done so well with her French in just a short time and she can do whatever she wants. She regretfully tells him that she never could do anything, always telling herself "Me? I can't!". Nonsense, he tells her she ought to be saying "Me? Yes I Can!" Is that was he's done, she asks? His face darkens and he bitterly hisses that he damn well should have done. She takes this to mean that he regrets being forced into their date but he denies it. She continues, admitting that she really only did it to show off, especially to Angie who thinks she only goes out with nerds. Ken thinks about that for a minute and decides to take it as a compliment. The wine arrives and Ken lets Raquel taste it, telling the waiter "She knows what's what".

Joe is taking his leave, too late now for a visit to granny (conveniently). Kevin and Sally see them off and Joe tentatively asks if he'll see Sally next week. She says darkly that she's not sure. Kevin gormlessly jumps to the conclusion that this refers to bank holiday Monday and Joe says he'll ring them at home on the weekend. After Joe leaves, Kevin remarks to Sally that Joe won't be alone for long, he'll be looking for a new mum for his son. He's not the type to be alone. Sally grimaces.

Diane Johnston

Henri Laurent ROGER DELVES-BROUGHTON
Written by ADELE ROSE Directed by CHARLES LAUDER Lake scenes Directed by MERVYN CUMMING


Originally transmitted: 27 & 30 August; 1, 3 & 6 September 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 10 - Friday 14 July 2000
Episode Numbers: 3586 - 3590

Monday (3586, Friday 27 August 1993)

The Lakes holiday is over for Sally and Kevin, and Kevin got up on the wrong side of the bed, this not so bright and early morning, Sally comments, as they prepare to leave. She suggests a song to Rosie, 'Nellie the Elephant' (packed her trunk, and said goodbye to the jungle!), but Kevin prefers 'The Sound of Silence.' " Hello Darkness my old friend" begins Sally, and says she doesn't think so! As all trippers do, Sally yells "Stop!" when Kevin drives off. "Now what?" grumbles Kevin. "Forgotten her juice," Sally admits.

Alf lumbers down the stairs at Grasmere Drive, in his pyjamas and dressing gown, and with a mild case of bed-head hair, calling for Audrey. No Audrey - only a note propped against the TV remote on the coffee table, is there to greet him.

At the café, Audrey is telling Gail about her note, which is full of instructions for Alf's day: shopping, washing, cleaning, etc., but most importantly, he's to have tea on the table when Audrey gets home from her new job at 6pm. Poor Alf, who's never cooked a meal in his life! Gail reminds her that she'd never been a Delia Smith herself, and Gail's childhood reminiscences of opening and heating up tins of baked beans prompt Audrey to reply that she'd fostered Gail's independence. "These days, I'd be called a progressive mother," laughs Audrey, and, taking her bagged scone from Phyllis, she rushes off to the new job, passing Angie at the door. There's a letter for Angie, from an old college friend in Mexico, not from the Bank, as Angie feared.

Not the usual vision of beauty, this morning, Raquel is spooning up her breakfast cereal, her hair completely wound up in a head full of baby blue rollers and pins. Betty brings in the mail - a large buff envelope is addressed to Nadia Wolstenholme - Raquel's professional modeling name, she informs Betty. She's about to relaunch her career, but properly this time, with a stint at the Mayfair Academy of Modeling, to start her off on the right foot. Betty thinks she's a bit long in the tooth, but, "I'm only 26," Raquel tells her. She eagerly reads the brochure, only to come up short, when she finds that the 8-week residential course will cost her £500, in advance! She wonders if Bet will give her some extra shifts, LOL, but Betty has some words of wisdom. She'll miss her friends, and her home, in London, and a secure, if not glamourous, job. "Ken thinks I'm a woman of infinite possibilities," Raquel rebuts, "But he doesn't have to pay for any of them, does he?" asks Betty.

Angie is reading her friend's letter, and mooning over her photo of sunny Mexico, when the phone jangles. Angie's late with her T-shirt designs, and assures her client that they'll be done by 2pm. She drags herself over to her drawing board. It looks like her muse is failing her.

In the pub, Deirdre and Rita chat about the future of the corner shop. Mrs. Scott is coming, at long last, and both Deirdre and Rita are sympathetic to the widow's difficult situation. As Deirdre leaves, Ken accosts her, anxious to discuss Tracy's four O' level GCSE's. He's worried about Tracy's future, as usual, and wants her to continue her schooling, but Deirdre is still unwilling to push Tracy, and prefers to worry about her own future, just now, and hurries off to meet with Mrs. Scott. Ken is teasingly surprised to see Raquel behind the bar, having expected her to be off to Paris. Raquel is somewhat embarrassed and apologetic, and explains that, actually, being behind the bar is like being a model, as she's in the public eye, and on display. Ken correctly surmises that the doom and gloom merchants have been at her - reality bites, feet on the ground, etc., and encourages her to follow her ambitions, quoting Oscar Wilde: "We're all of us in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." Raquel is charmed, but Betty interrupts with, "Excuse me, Nadia, but when you've finished chatting up Maurice Chevalier, here, there's a light ale wanting at the other end!"

Kevin drives up to the Webster front door in just as bad a mood as he was when they set out two hours earlier. Rosie's acting-up has driven him up the wall, and when the suitcase he's unloading spills on to the pavement, he explodes in temper. Sally isn't angry, though. She knows he's been worrying about his court case and his job, and a little sympathy and a sidewalk snog calm him down. As they re-pack the case, a snazzy yellow TR7 car, driven by a bottle blonde, pulls up. In her dark glasses, tight black pants, and revealing bustier, she's an eyeful. "Who's that?" Sally wonders. "Don't know," says Kevin, with that silly smile fellers get, when they like what they see, LOL! The mysterious blonde breezes into the corner shop, and apologises to Deirdre, for getting lost on the way. It's Mrs. Scott, Deirdre realises, in amazement!

Alf ambles into the café, where Phyllis has a bit of fun teasing him about being one of those new-fangled househusbands. Alf isn't amused. He's flummoxed that Audrey has changed her mind about moving to Lytham, and, also, that after avoiding work for all these years, she's got herself a job, just when he's retired. Phyllis retorts that you never know when the career bug will bite, as she was turned 70 before she got the urge to enter the catering trade! I do miss Phyllis' cheeky humour, bless her heart!

In the shop, Mrs. Scott, not exactly sunk low in grief, reminisces about her dear departed Brendan, and mocks, albeit affectionately, the reality of his ambitions. It was all for her benefit, that he worked so hard, she tells Deirdre, for her clothes, the foreign holidays, and little gifts, as she admires the rock on her right hand, plus the TR7 parked outside. He liked to spoil her, and Deirdre should know what a generous man he was, working with him as she did - LOL! All she had to do was click her fingers. "I can imagine," mutters Deirdre. But down to business - Mrs. Scott offers Deirdre first refusal on the shop, at a £5,000 discount off the price Brendan paid, of £65,000, for a quick sale. Of course, Deirdre cannot accept, but was hoping that Mrs. Scott would be keeping the place going. This evokes a dismissive laugh. Her days behind a till are long gone. She was Miss Bettabuy's 1977 - and Deirdre sees all! Mrs. Scott wants Deirdre to keep the place open, as a going concern will be easier to sell, but not to bother re-stocking, let the place wind down. She's off to the estate agent forthwith, but first wants to talk to the upstairs tenant, and can Deirdre help? Course she can.

As the two women enter the Rovers', Jack, Jim, and Don's jaws drop to the floor! Jack is eager to serve, but it's Ken who gets the honour, holding on to the handshake, just a little too long. She won't have a drink, as she doesn't like to leave the TR7 too long. (!) She offers him the sale of the flat, but he tells her he'd had the chance before, and still isn't interested. She's disappointed, as she wanted to sell the place lock, stock, and barrel, and a sitting tenant is a complication - she'll have to see about that. As she leaves, the centre of all male attention, Deirdre wishes that there were such a thing as a sitting shop assistant. Ken thinks his tenancy is safe, but Jack isn't so sure. Unscrupulous landlords have intimidating ways - like cutting the water off, or removing the stairs! (This rang some bells - doesn't Alec do something like that to Jack and Vera, at some future time, in the Rovers'???) When Deirdre notices that Mrs. Scott has left her sunglasses, Jim and Don fall over themselves to chase after her with them, but Jack appropriates them, as legitimate lost property, and the responsibility of Newton & Ridley's employees only. "Give 'em here!" snaps Betty, behind him, and whips them out of his hand, to his chagrin.

Ken's words to Raquel have had their effect, we realise, as she carefully closes the rear door to the Rovers' bar, and picks up the phone. She's calling the Mayfair Academy, to see if there are any vacancies in the next 8-week residential course. Raquel must be in a time warp. As Diane noted recently, it's 1993, but Raquel's tight, black mini-skirt threatens to ride up just a smidgen too far, as she bends to dial the numbers! Some tugging and wriggling ensue, as she speaks.

Angie's on the phone too, still making excuses to her client, for not completing her designs as promised, earlier. She's obviously getting some flak, because she loses her professional cool, and tells him to stuff his lousy order. "These are bog-standard T-shirts I'm making, not Lady Di's wedding frock!" she snarls, and hangs up. She rips up the design on her drawing board. Burnt her bridges now, has Angie.

Kevin has been complaining ever since they got home about a stiff, sore neck and/or back, and moans some more, as Sally bustles by with the laundry basket. While she gives him a quick massage, he maunders on about what a good bloke Joe Broughton is, loaning them the cottage, and shocks Sally by telling her he's noticed how much Joe admires her. He must realise what he's missing, seeing us playing happy families, he says, not at all suspicious, but that last comment seems to set Sally thinking.

Audrey arrives home, exhausted, with burning feet, and plops down into the armchair, but there's no Alf waiting to greet her, and no tea either. Hoisting her with her own petard, Alf has left her a note on the coffee table - Gone to Pub. Back at closing time. At the Rovers', he tells Betty that there'll be no tea for Audrey tonight or any night, until she comes to her senses. Betty thinks it's like Kramer versus Kramer, when these two get their heels dug in, but Alf retorts that it's reason versus insanity, and he knows which will triumph.

As Raquel picks up empty glasses from Angie's table in the bar, Angie stops her. "You're collecting pots - in career terms, that's one notch lower than the lowest of the low. You could at least look exploited," she complains, half-heartedly. She's gobsmacked when Raquel replies with Ken's quotation. "We're all of us in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars - Oscar Wilde," Raquel gently tells her. Curly pops in, and offers Angie a Chinese, but she'd prefer a Mexican, Acapulco, to be exact. She won't explain, and Curly complains that she's had a face on her all week. She's fed up, which, Curly feels, is a good reason to eat out on a Friday night. Angie couldn't care less, but tags along. Jack is admiring Kevin's tan, remarking that it must be a suntrap in the Lake District. (Hold on a minute-I never saw any sun, while they were there-there never is any, so where did the tan come from?) "Who needs sunshine, when you've got outstanding natural beauty to look at, especially when you're married to it?" Kevin replies, and grins happily. At least someone has cheered up!

At home, Sally is telling Gail all about Joe Broughton's advances. She doesn't believe he really loves her, but is only desperate to replace his wife, as Kevin suggested earlier. Gail's advice is to give up looking after little Jonathan, but Sally is reluctant to disrupt the child's life all over again, especially as Kevin knows how fond she is of him, and would wonder. Gail tells her that she'll be giving Joe all the wrong signals if she continues, if they are the wrong signals. Sally is upset, denying that has any feelings for Joe, but Gail, after her experiences with Carmel, isn't so sure. Perhaps the attention from such an attractive man is flattering? If not, why isn't Sally telling Kevin? Because he would go mad, he'd kill him, is Sally's answer, and there's no need for him to know. Which is what Martin said about Carmel, retorts Gail, but it's not the same, Sally feels. Gail reiterates, give up looking after Jonathan, because where he is, so is Joe. Sally is left wondering, full of doubt and indecision.

At the closed café, our sweet Curly, trying to cheer up Angie, has microwaved a couple of burritos, as per her earlier wish, but she won't be cheered, as all she wanted was to be on her own. They decide to eat in the café, rather than in her flat, as she's often done before, at night, once with Neil. Curly thinks that's why she's down in the dumps, but that just gets Angie's back up - it's not a man who's got her fed up, it's her college pal Alice Heward, who's now a designer in Mexico. "So what? You're a designer in Weatherfield," pipes Curly. "Precisely!" retorts Angie. Curly thinks there are worse ways to make a living, but Angie can think of better ones than designing T-shirts. Curly is encouraging - she's a young entrepreneur, and just starting out, but Angie is feeling trapped, and just wants to pack it in and run off some where. Even to Mexico - what's to keep her here? "Me," says Curly, eliciting an old-fashioned look from Angie. She can't just pack in her job, he tells her, but she's probably already done it, she responds, and anyway, why is he arguing with her? Doesn't he have ambitions too? She repeats Oscar Wilde again, and although Raquel probably got it off the back of a matchbox, she feels it's true. But Curly only looks at stars through a telescope. He prefers the realistic view, he begins to argue, but Angie jumps on him. "Oh, come on, Curly! You're in a rut, just like me!" she cries angrily, "Trainspotting by the time you're forty!" Curly is dismissive. Everybody has half-baked dreams, in the middle of stock-taking, but no one does anything about it, "and neither will you, so face up to it!" "Thanks a lot, Curly! Just the kind of encouragement I'm looking for!" Angie replies, and the burritos no longer appeal, as she jumps up from the table. Curly tries to apologise, and explain, but she won't have it. "Curly, leave me alone! Go!" Curly sadly leaves, saying no more, but looks back at her worriedly, from the door. She slumps dispiritedly against the counter, in the gloomy, empty café, after he's gone.

Turmoil and anxiety all around, today, but Mrs. Scott's cameo was a treat. A totally different side to Brendan became apparent, after he's gone, when we met his Missus. Unfortunately, his demise, and her appearance, are grounds for unsettling times for Deirdre and Ken, not to mention the Street as a whole. Who's going to buy the shop? Stay tuned!

Ruth Hempsey

First Appearance of Debi Scott - LESLEY CLARE O'NEILL
Written by - MARK WADLOW Directed by - CHARLES LAUDER Lake Scenes directed by - MERVYN CUMMING

Tuesday (3587, Monday 30 August 1993)

Today is August Bank Holiday in Coronation Street just as it was for all the original viewers. Art mirrors life in the various ways the folks in the Street spend their day off.

Derek is on his hands and knees doing a spot of weeding by the fence between his house and Des Barnes'. Des strolls into his backyard with coffee mug in hand. He notices Derek and turns to greet Colin who has followed him into the garden. Pointing to Derek's presence, Des initiates a conversation with his brother about a proposed Bank Holiday party. Des thinks he can muster five or six people. Colin catches on and says he won't be back from the Queen's until about midnight but he can bring a mob along from the pub as Des' friends will all be getting their second wind by that time. Derek listens to this exchange intently, pressing himself close to the fence, his face revealing pain at the thought of a noisy party next door. Colin remembers there's a ship in at the port so he could invite some of those lads over. "Oh yes, they're good for a laugh" says Des. "Tell them to come any time." Evil grins from Des and Colin as they retreat towards the back door.(Derek's face drops further) Out of earshot of Derek, Des asks his brother if he's coming home tonight. "Not if I can help it," Colin replies. Des says he'll have a quiet night in as usual.

In the Kabin, Rita is telling Angie that she's on her own as Mavis is having a day off to be with Derek. Andy bursts in and interrupts the conversation. He needs a film for his camera in a hurry. Angie ribs him. "It's getting serious when you start taking pictures of one another!" Andy grins sheepishly then dashes off. "Ah, young love" comments Rita. "Remind what it is again" says Angie unaware that Curly entered the shop as Andy exited. Rita saves Angie from saying anything embarrassing by greeting Curly and there is an awarkward moment as Curly and Angie become aware of each others presence. Curly hangs back at the door until Rita asks if he's forgotten what he came for and advances to the counter acknowledging Angie's presence. Angie wants to get out of Curly's way and on being told her shopping will set her back the best part of a tenner resignedly says, "Oh well, what's one more hole in my escape plan." Rita is surprised. "You're not planning on leaving us?" "Oh we all have our plans Rita, but you know me, all of my plans are half-baked." This is said pointedly for Culy's benefit, recalling their previous spat in the cafe. Curly tries to say something but Angie ignores him. Rita tells her if we don't have our dreams what do we have. "Oh I take the realistic view," replies Angie. "We all know I'll never do anything about it. Don't we Curly?" is her parting shot. Rita wonders if she's missed something. "I'm sure I have", says Curly ruefully.

In Jim's cafe, Gail is loading up on provisions for a family get together. Audrey comments that there are enough buns to feed an army and Gail tells her that Ivy and Don are also coming. "Oh that should be fun," says Audrey sarcastically. "They hardly say two words to each other these days." "That's two more than you and Alf" reminds Gail. Audrey haughtily replies that perhaps they havn't caught on to the idea of writing notes to each other! Gail asks if Alf is on a diet or should she put in more sausages. "Is he joining us?" Audrey feigns surprise and tells Gail that Alf tends to make his own plans nowadays. Gail is shocked. "You did tell him didn't you?" "Now did I remember too scribble that down?" wonders Audrey as Gail goes to the phone. Audrey declines to speak to Alf. "It's your barbeque," she tells Gail. Gail is exasperated. "Alf, there seems to have been a breakdown in communication about this afternoon . . ."

The destination for Andy's photographic expedition is revealed. It's a safari park. Andy, Amy and her son Dominic are in the safari van. Little Dominic is thrilled and Amy tells Andy he couldn't have picked a better place to come as Dominic is obsessed with animals at the moment. Dominic roars in appreciation. They are in the lion enclosure and Andy remarks how close they get as a lioness appears to be about to demolish the windsceen wiper. "You're not scared?' asks Amy. "They're only big cats," Dominic tells him. "Well I don't want one curled up on the end of my bed" says Andy.

It's a nice day at the Safari Park but definitely damp looking in the Street. Don knocks on Derek's front door with Percy looking on. The door is opened by one of the James Gang. Oh no, it's Derek with a scarf tied over his mouth and nose. Don is not sure what to make of this. "Were having a bit of a barbeque round at Martin and Gail's . . "Yes I know," grumps Derek, pulling down his bandana. Apparently it's proving difficult to light and causing a lot of smoke. Don has come to borrow firelighters. "Has he got any?" asks Gail as she comes up the path. "No!" snaps Mr. Grumpy, "but what I have got is this." He disappears and returns with a large orange ball wedged in a potted plant. "Oh! Nicky wondered where that was." Gail retrieves the ball. "No firelighters then?." "No!" Percy chips in and tells them firelighters are no good. "Weren't you ever in the Boy Scouts?" "They wouldn't have me," Don tells him. "Me woggle wasn't big enough." "That's an old'un," says Percy. Gail says she'll try Deidre but Percy says not to as she's worried about her job. Gail, Don and Percy start up about the situation at the corner shop but the Unmasked Man interrupts. "Do you all mind? What's happening to this street today? It is only a Monday. It's not as if there aren't going to be any more Mondays!" "Not for Brendan Scott" Percy says. "It's a holiday," Don reminds Derek. "Not for reired people," Derek says pointedly at Percy, "every day's a holiday for them!" Derek then goes into a little rant delivered in a style reminiscent of Tony Hancock (if you remember him) about what a Bank Holiday should be. A time for 'us workers' to comtemplate and relax. But no! There has to be barbeques and parties and balls flying over the street. Not to mention a shipload of sailors invading! Wagging his finger, he warns his gaping audience that he will be the first to call the Environmental Health if it gets out of control and stomps inside. "Mavis not about?" queries Gail. Percy tells them she has gone to a pottery exhibition with Mrs. Bishop. Gail and Don exchange a look. That explains everything!

Back at the Safari Park the van has moved on to the elephant enclosure. The party feed apples to the elephant trunks poking in through the van window. Amy asks Dominic if they are African or Indian elephants. Dominic displays his knowledge of elephants learned from a recent school project for which he got two gold stars. "Modest with it," says Andy, impressed.

Angie is packing Maureen's wedding dress. "You'll be stitching me up as I go down the aisle, the rate I'm losing weight." says Maureen. "It's nerves. You'll understand when it's your turn." Angie is negative about getting married. "That's what they all say!" giggles Maureen. She gives Angie a present. It's a charm bracelet. Maureen tells her she has started her off with a cross, heart and anchor for Faith, Hope and Charity. Also a pair of scissors for Angie's occupation. She hopes Angie can come to the wedding but Angie is not sure. You'd better eat between now and then Angie tells her. "Fill out every curve of this dress and make Reggie proud of you." "Well I'm quite proud of myself as it happens." "For hooking Reg?" Maureen tells her she has finally made up her mind what she wants and is making it happen in spite of her mother's attitude and that is an acheivement that makes her quite proud of herself. "Good for you," says Angie in admiration. She then notices another charm on the bracelet. "What's the wishbone for?" "That's for you to decide, Angie" Maureen tells her. Angie is touched. She sees Maureen in a different light.

In the Rovers, Raquel is behaving strangely. Jack and Betty stare at her as she rolls her eyes in different directions. No, she has not suddenly taken up the Steve McDonald Method of acting. She tells them she is strengthening her eye muscles. She tells them that people are always complaining they don't have time to exercise but this isn't true. You can always find time to do something no matter where you are. She demonstrates then goes to pick up some glasses. Two nubile young women enter the bar their midriffs displayed abundently. Curly needs serving. "You exercise your legs Betty," Jack tells her. "I'm still exercising me eyeballs!" Reg enters in his Bank Holiday best. (Pale yellow cable knit sweater and cravat) He is singing as he approaches Curly at the bar. "I'm in the mood for love, simply because you're near me . . Curly looks round. There is no one else. Curly, tries to change the subject by offering to buy him a drink and asks Reg if he heard about Brendan Scott. "Very sad!" Reg has no more to say on that. He is keen to proposition Curly on another matter. In Reg's usual flowery way of speaking, he beats around the bushes so much that Curly begins to wonder if Reg isn't going to drag him into the bushes for some last homo-erotic fling before settling into hetero-wedded bliss. As Reg rambles on how close they've become and how although the urge to consummate his desires has come on rather late in life it should still be approached with delicacy. "Although a man's a man, and you are, that isn't to say you shouldn't be formally approached." (Wheels turning in Curly's mind) "What I'm trying to say Curly, (hand on shoulder) will you be mine?" (Gulp!!) "In what sense?" "In every sense. That ultimate night of male bonding. (Double Gulp!!) That last fling before I'm attached to one woman for the rest of time - the traditional duties expected of a groom's best man!" Curly is very relieved! "Oh! best man, you want me to be your best man! Is that all?" "Yes, well what else?" "Well you can't be too sure nowadays!" Reg is oblivious to any ambiguity in his handling of his request and plunges onto the next subject, the possiblity that Curly's love life might change if he and Angie attend the wedding. He asks Betty to back him up on his assertion that weddings are an aphrodisiac. "For every one but the bride and groom," says Betty tartly. Curly is finally recovered from his misreading of Reg's intentions and tells Reg he can count on him to do the honours.

The Jungle Jaunt has now moved on to the baboons. One jummps onto the hood of the van. Amy thinks it's got a sad face. "Looks familiar," says Andy. "Anyone we know Dom?" "Mummy's boss!" says Dominic. Amy is scandalized but Andy agrees. The baboon is like Curly Watts and Andy takes a photo to prove it. The baboon's face dissolves into a glum looking Curly at the bar of the Rovers. . .

. . . where Colin is telling Curly about the joke he and Des are playing on Derek. "He's probably twitching his curtains waiting for a dozen drunken sailors to appear on the back lawn." Curly thinks there's a real party. "OK I'll come. What time?" he asks with little enthusiasm. Colin tries to explain it's a wind-up not a real party but Curly is lost in thought. Colin queries Jack, "I thought it was the guy at the Mini Mart that died?" "It was." "Just checking" says Colin. He leaves the bar meeting Des who is on his way in. He tells Des, "He's all yours" and motions to the morose manager. Des has bought a takeout and has come for a bottle of wine. Angie arrives with Maureen who is clutching the wedding dress box. Reg who is waiting for her pretends to look in the box. Slap and tickle ensues. "So you finished the dress?" asks Curly. "No," Angie replies with sarcasm. "I only say I'm going to do something and then I don't!" Curly tells her that Reg has asked him to be his best man. "Well I'm sure your speech on their future happiness together will be the highlight of the event!" Angie retorts as she moves on to speak to Des. She asks him if he's drinking the bottle of wine alone and he replies on the contrary he has a take out pizza and two slices of garlic bread. Not backward in coming forward, Angie invites her frozen lasagna to dinner with Des' pizza and they leave the pub together. Curly, the sad baboon is even sadder.

Andy and Amy are leaving the Safari Park. Dominic is dead to the world in Andy's arms. "How did I do?" he asks Amy. In answer she gives him a kiss.

As Sally and Kevin come through their door the phone is ringing. Kevin answers and Sally pauses on the stairs with Rosie when she hears it's Joe on the line. He is checking about what time to bring Jonathan next week. Sally skulks in the dining room and refuses to talk to Joe. Kevin is surprised when he realizes Joe didn't know they came back on Friday. He asks her why she didn't phone and thank Joe. Sally snaps at him she forgot and disappears upstairs.

Derek is skulking about in his back garden waiting for the appearence of smoke, flying balls or sailors. (Or all three if he's very lucky) He startles Angie when he asks her if she's the first to arrive. "Derek! You made me spill me plonk!" "I doubt there'll be a shortage of that when the sailors turn up." "Sailors??" Angie asks but Derek launches into his own party piece. "I don't mind you having a good time but please have some respect for the neighbours and keep the noise down!" Angie wonders what that was about. Des appears with the food and she tells him she's just had the strangest conversation with Derek. "Is there any other kind?" asks Des. Angie tells Des she is quite disappointed the Barnes Brothers haven't wreaked havoc over the neighborhood. Des tells her since Colin got involved with Liz he spends time on his own just as before. They each try to top the other with how boring their present existence is. Des says he basically wallows and Angies replies she has wallowing perfected.

Curly is still in the Rovers. He asks Betty's opinion about weddings being good romantic venues. Betty is sure they are. She knows plenty of couples who have met at weddings. "Like who?" Curly wants examples but Betty can only think of Mike and Susan Baldwin who met at Audrey and Alf's wedding. Don's feeling tired and Raquel tells him that he should be getting more air into his lungs. She gives Don and Jack a demonstration which they admire from a sideways elevation. "You'll be back to 20/20 vision by the end of day," remarks Betty as Jack gives his eyeballs another workout. Raquel tells Jack and Don to fill their lungs but this only results in Jack collapsing in a fit of coughing.

In another part of the bar Maude is remarking that she hasn't been to a decent funeral in ages. "Mother!" Maureen is embarrassed. Maude asks Reg if there will be a good turnout for Brendan's funeral. Reg isn't sure. "He must have had some friends, I suppose." Maude then recalls a very nice cremation she went to a while back where she had a marvellous time. Percy adds, "It's sad but it can be a very uplifting experience." "Depends which side of the curtain you're on, I suppose" observes Maude. Reg and Maureen look glum over the turn the conversation has taken.

Rita sees Derek in the bar and tells him she meant to pop over but time slipped away from her today. He tells her she's lucky as he's had smoke from the Platt's barbecue billowing over his garden all afternoon. "And Heaven knows what we're in for from number 6 tonight!" He tries to find out if Curly is going to Des' party. Curly tells him there is no party. "Oh no? Well Angie Freeman's just turned up loaded with bottles" Derek tells him. More glum monkey. "Nobody said owt to me about a party" adds Raquel looking put out.

Rita accosts Don and Audrey. "I was having a Wilton-free day until you lot smoked him out." "Nice time? All the family together?" Audrey and Don are non-committal. They make some grunting noises. Rita carries on regardless. "So, where are your other halves? Buried them in the garden?" Don and Audrey look as if they wished this was the case.

Maureen asks Reg about Brendan's funeral. Reg tells her he isn't looking forward to it. Maureen tells him he must go as his poor widow will need his support as she was once the Area Manager's wife like she is about to be. Maureen says she would like to think someone would be there for her if anything happened to Reg. Reg tells her nothing is going to happen to him. "Pity" says Maude, "I've got this nice new outfit all ready." "That's to wear at our wedding, Mother," says Maureen through clenched teeth. "Weddings, funerals, same difference," retorts Maude.

Des emerges from the house. Raquel just phoned to find out about the party. Des tells Angie that Raquel got quite stroppy when he told her there was no party. Angie tells Des about Maureen's visit and how she seems so excited about her wedding and what lies ahead. Angie is frightened there are no mysteries left in life for her. Des asks her if it's no go between her and Curly and she tells him that's the case. He asks he want she really wants. "Personally, I'm sick of 1993" says Des. "Pretend it's 1994. What would your New Year Resolutions be?" Angie tells him not to be living round here anymore, see more of life than the inside of her flat and get off her backside and travel. "So what's stopping you?" asks Des. "Is that a push I can feel?" "Happy New Year, Angie" toasts Des. A decision has been made.

Libby Seekings

Dominic Nelson LEON ANWAR
Wrtitten By PATREA SMALLACOMBE Directed By ROMEY ALLISON

Wednesday (3588, Wednesday 1 September 1993)

We open at the Rover's with Raquel having what might be a narsecuppatee. She hears the post being pushed through the door and rushes to fetch it. Anxiously, she sorts through the envelopes but is disappointed to find that there is nothing for her. She tosses the mail onto the table.

Chez Webster, Kevin bids Rosie adieu. Sally is alarmed that Kevin is already leaving, given that Joe is due to drop Jonathon off, and tries to convince Kev to stick around. "Don't you want to say thank you?" "I did last night, " Kevin says, "which is more than I can say for you. I'll see ya later". He starts to leave. "Wait!", Sally shouts. "I have to go and fetch bread", she insists, rummaging through her bag for some money. "I'll be right back", she says over her shoulder, leaving a bewildered Kevin behind.

Over at the Kabin, Angie has a smile on her face. Rita comments that it's so nice to see a smile, given that there's a funeral scheduled that day. Angie is surprised that the corner shop is open. Rita says that Mrs. Scott felt a few hours is enough for people to pay their respects, and it's what Brendan would have wanted. "He would have hated the idea of losing a whole day's worth of profits. It's Deirdre I feel sorry for now. She doesn't know where the heck she stands, how quickly the shop will sell, whether the new owners will keep her on." A new carefree Angie is unconcerned. "It's not worth worrying about, is it? There's a big, wide world out there." "I doubt Deirdre will see it that way," says Rita, but Angie has obviously taken Des' pep talk to heart.

Joe arrives with Jonathon and is surprised when Kevin answers the door. Kevin tells him that Sally has popped out to the shop. Joe asks him about the court case. Kevin says he's told Sally and that he'd put himself through grief for nothing. "I don't know what I did to deserve her". An envious Joe responds, "you're a lucky man, Kevin." He reluctantly leaves.

To the Rovers where Raquel is putting on her face. "Bet got off alright?" Betty asks. "He'd not be sitting around here if she hadn't," Raquel answers, pointing to Jack, who's comfortably sitting at the table checking the horses and having a fag. "I'm entitled to me tea break," he protests. "You've not been in here 5 minutes," is Raquel's comment. Raquel informs Betty that Bet is due back that evening. Betty doesn't understand why Bet had to go all the way to London just to meet Vicky, when Vicky made it all the way to London from Hong Kong on her own. "She wouldn't have an excuse for a day in London, would she," says Raquel. "What's so special about flamin' London?" Jacks wants to know. "It's the capital, ain't it," Raquel says, "where it all happens, down south like -- London, Croydon". "Croydon?" Jack interjects. "Well, it's not far from London, is it?" Jack isn't impressed. "What have they got in London that we haven't got here?" "I've just told you, it's the capital," a frustrated Raquel tells him. "It's got style, fashion houses." "I think you're wasting your time, luv, Betty says. "Now, if it were public houses..." "You'd think he were born on a different planet," a dejected Raquel says. Jack laughs over the fact that with 6 teams in the premier league, London still can't win the title.

Over in the cafe, Percy is giving Phyllis a hard time. "Are you going to be all day with that tea cake?" Kevin laughs at the exchange that ensues between them, and Gail tells him not to encourage them. He tells Gail he's back to the treadmill and the holiday already seems like a distant memory. Gail looks thoughtfully after him. "Here, have you had your thumb in it?" Percy asks when Phyllis brings him his tea cake. "Course I have. It's good for me arthritis," Phyllis cackles, rotating her thumb right under his nose.

Reg and Curly watch Brendan Scott's funeral procession pull into the church grounds. "Expensive, these days," is Reg's comment. "If Brendan had known how much it was going to cost, he'd have been a lot happier if they'd brought him on his delivery bike!" "Reg, please, try and show a bit of respect, shall we," Curly says. He sees someone stepping out of a car. "Hey, I didn't know Brendan had a daughter." "Daughter?" Reg says. "There," Curly tells him, "getting out of the car." "That's his widow," Reg informs Curly. "What, that is?" Curly yelps, his eyes popping out of his head. "Miss Bettabuy 1997. Brendan was on the judging panel. I don't need to elaborate, do I?" Reg smirks.

At the Rovers, Jack waxes philosophical with Don about the meaning of life. "Where did we go wrong? Look at Baldwin. Flash cars, vacations..." "At least I have a clear conscience and can sleep at night," Don says. "Anyway, what's brought this on? You certainly know how to cheer a fellow up. Here, have one for yourself. See, life's not all bad." Jack is smiling again. Likes the simple things in life, does RJack. Raquel is jerked out of a daydream by Betty. She goes to serve Fiona. "I'll get that," Steve MacDonald quickly says. Steve attempts to flirt with Fiona, but quickly loses interest when Fiona asks when his girlfriend is due back. "Look, I didn't come in here to talk about Vicky". "No, you didn't. I know what you came in here for," Fiona replies. She feeds him a forkful of his hot pot.

The funeral is over. "Brief but touching" is Curly's assessment. Reg and Curly continue to eye Mrs. Scott from a distance as she bids goodbye to people. "I still can't believe it," Curly says. Reg's opinion is that they were both getting something out of it. "She got a meal ticket for life. A life style she could only dream about if she hadn't been blessed with, well, I don't have to spell it out for you," he says, as Curly grins lecherously. Suddenly she's alone. Reg rushes over to her and offers his condolences. "Mr...?" she says. Reg introduces himself. He starts to pump her for information about what she's going to do with the shop. He offers to act as an advisor in the matter, "to repay your late husband in some small way for everything he's done for me over the years. He was a dear friend," he sniffles, pulling out a hanky and wiping his nose. Mrs. Scott beats a hasty exit. Curly sidles over. "The word, Norman, is diplomacy." "The word, Reg, is hypocrisy," Curly dryly says.

At the cafe, Gail hands Angie, who seems determined to gloat in as many locations as she can, a glass of orange juice. Angie joins Percy, who begins a "when I was younger..." discussion. "Kids today get grants for this, grants for that. They take off all over the world in their 20's. How can they appreciate that if they've never worked for it?" Angie pretends to agree. "Quite right, Mr. Sugden. These people who just pack it in and take off to the other side of the world. I don't know what they're thinking of." "I'm glad to see at least one of you has a sense of responsibility," Percy says, but Angie is clearly taking the mickey and has definitely made a decision to leave Weatherfield.

Raquel is in the back of the pub having another episode of staring into space when Jack pops in to say goodbye. "It doesn't suit you," he says, "having a face like the back of the 49 bus. Now if it were Vera, it would be an improvement. Ta da." "What's the matter with you?" an exasperated Betty asks when she enters the room and sees Raquel. "It's not your problem," Raquel sighs. "Oh yes it is, young lady. Working with you behind that bar is as fun as a toothache. Come on, let's be having it." Raquel begins talking, and it seems that Angie hasn't been the only one feeling like she's in a rut and wondering where her life is going. Betty says the usual words about counting one's blessings but they don't help much. She then administers the British cure-all -- a cup of tea.

Gail asks Emily how the funeral was. "He wasn't all bad," Phyllis comments. "He knew how to look after us pensioners." Gail and Emily agree that Alf wouldn't be too pleased to hear that. Gail asks Emily if she knows anything about the do Alf's mates are giving him at the Queens. "It's news to me," Emily says. Gail wants to know what she should wear. "Ask Alf," Emily suggests. "I have," says Gail, "and all I got was an ear bashing about how folk are two-faced." "If it's going to be as bad as he expects, you'd be better stopping at home," Emily says. "What, and miss all those speeches?" Gail responds sarcastically.

Des has a visitor. Surprise, it's Angie, over to gloat in yet another location. She gives him a present (her CD collection) as a thank you for opening her eyes. "You might as well take them or they'll end up in the bin because I won't need them where I'm going. I'm off to Mexico!" she announces. Des is stunned. "By 'eck, you don't do things by half measures, girl." She explains that she wants to go to Mexico because she's fascinated by Aztec culture. "I'm off this Monday," she tells him. "I leave here tomorrow. I just want to get on with the rest of my life."

Back at the pub, Bet phones from London to say she's stopping overnight. Amy and Andy discuss the trip to the safari park and how successful it was. They decide to spend a quite night in and seal their plan with a smooch.

Gail arrives at Sally's to pick up David. "You decided to have him after all," Gail says as she watches Sally put Jonathon's coat on. "What I said didn't make a bit of difference." "I reckon I didn't have much choice without taking it out on Jonathon," Sally says. She describes how Jonathon has improved since she's been minding him. "There are other child minders," Gail points out, but Sally says he'd have to adjust and might not be able to. Gail listens dubiously. "There's nothing to be said then, is there." "I know you think I'm a fool but I know exactly what I'm getting myself into," Sally insists. "You do, maybe, but what about Joe?" Gail says quietly.

Des tries to convince Angie that she needs a farewell do, but Angie is having none of it. Des offers to drive her to London. "If you think I'm out of my mind, you can say," Angie challenges him. But Des says, "if you don't do it now, you never will, and you'll spend the rest of your life wondering what might have been. Good luck to you, I say. You'll be missed around here, but it's your life." Angie thanks him by pecking him on the head. "I'll see you tomorrow night about 7:30, " she says, and leaves. Des looks forlorn. Does he wish he hadn't encouraged her so strongly to follow her dreams?

Joe arrives to pick up Jonathon. "Sorry I missed you this morning," he says to Sally. "Nothing Kevin couldn't handle," Sally says. "He didn't stop talking about you all the way here," Joe says about Jonathon. He stops short as Kevin strides out from the kitchen. Sally looks smug as Kevin throws his arm around her, and her face sends a silent message to Joe. "I don't know what we'd do without you, either of us," a desperate Joe says weakly. "Well, let's hope it doesn't come to that, shall we," Sally warns, with Kevin oblivious to the true meaning of the conversation.

The phone rings at the Rovers. It's for Raquel, and she goes into the back to take the call. Curly whinges on to Angie about the horrible day he's had at Bettabuys. "Not one of your better days," Angie says, knowing she's about to hurt him deeply. "What were you saying to me about settling for what I've got or doing something about it? It doesn't just apply to me, you know." "Yeah, I know, except I wanted to talk to someone, someone who would understand how I felt," Curly says. For the first time all day, Angie stops gloating. "We've always understood each other haven't we, me and you," Curly continues. "Not always, Curly," says Angie, who's about to do something that he'll have a very difficult time understanding. "Nearly always," Curly responds. "We're still old pals, aren't we," he says, putting his arm around her. "This friendship of ours doesn't stretch to weddings, does it? Because I"m going to be Reg's best man and it would be more bearable if I wasn't on my own." "Ah," Angie says, "it might be a bit difficult. I'm not sure where I'll be or what I'll be doing." "Well, if you can make it," Curly says. "If I can," is her reply. Suddenly she wants to leave (coward). "I have to go, I'll see you." She smiles and then gives him a long look, leaving Curly to finish his drink alone. Poor Curly. Raquel rushes back into the pub after finishing her phone call. "It was the Mayfair Academy," she excitedly tells Betty and Jack. "The one I wrote up to for a course, and guess what? I start on Monday! Modeling school. In Croydon. Isn't it exciting!" "It will be, especially when Bet finds out. This'll be news to her, I take it," Betty says, dulling Raquel's excitement a tad. Raquel stares ahead, contemplating her future conversation with Bet, as the closing music begins.

Sarah Ettritch

Jonathon Broughton - TOM LEWIS Rosie Webster - EMMA COLLINGE Debi Scott - LESLEY CLARE O'NEILL David Platt - THOMAS ORMSON
Written by BARRY HILL Directed by ROMEY ALLISON

Thursday (3589, Friday 3 September 1993)

In front of No. 13 Joe arrives with Jonathan. Sally sees them and dashes across the street to Angie and engages her in a fake conversation in order to avoid talking to Joe. Joe leaves Jonathan with Sally and looks really unimpressed with her behaviour.

Angie, having broken free from Sally, bursts into Des' place to arrange his day for him. First he can pick up her sewing machine and drop it off at her friend's place then he can drop her downtown at the Mexican consulate, as she needs to pick up a tourist card. He can go then but needs to be available later that evening to take her to the bus station! Des looks bemused as Angie flaps around his kitchen trying to sort out the rest of her day. "Do they have tornados in Mexico?" he asks. "I've no idea," says Angie. "I hope they know they've got one coming!" says Des.

In the back room at the Rovers, Raquel is ironing and discussing her new living arrangements in Croydon (her mate Janine's spare room) with Betty. Betty cannot believe Raquel is just going to leave without telling Bet. Raquel says it's not her fault that Bet decided to stay overnight in London with Vicky; she can't tell her if she's not here. Betty points out that the hotel phone number is on the pad by the phone; there's nothing stopping Raquel from picking up the phone. Raquel feebly chickens out of calling. "Bet's been very good to you, you know," admonishes Betty "you'll want to remember that when you're prowling the cat walks." She snorts and leaves.

In the 'caff' Gail asks Steve if he's looking forward to Vicky's return. Phyllis interrupts, hasn't Vicky been to China?

"Hong Kong" replies Steve.

"Ahh, travel broadens the mind doesn't it? She won't want Weatherfield after seeing what she's seen" says Phyllis.

"Oh, I wouldn't say that," adds Gail.

"Well would you want to come back to Weatherfield if you hadn't got to? 'Course you wouldn't. Nowt worth putting your specs on for" declares Phyllis.

"Oh I don't know Phyllis. I mean Weatherfield does have its attractions," says Steve.

"Huh. Give me one," demands Phyllis.

Steve pauses.

"Percy Sugden?" - LOL!

"You lost that one Phyllis," says Gail while Phyllis swats Steve with a tea towel.

Sally enters the caff under the pretence of giving the kids their lunch. Gail knows she's trying to avoid Joe. She tells Sally to just give up minding Jonathan. Sally says she can't as he's too settled. Gail seems to think otherwise.

In the bar, Betty is snorting and huffing over Raquel's' disregard for Bet. Jack says he'll go and have a word with her. He finds Raquel on the phone to Bet's hotel in London - one problem however, Bet checked out that morning.

While the kids scoff their fish fingers Sally goes up to the flat to apologize to Angie for her bizarre behaviour earlier. Angie tells her about Mexico but to keep it to herself as nobody else knows but Des. Sally's shocked and tells her she's crazy. Angie replies that's why she's not told anyone - if enough people tell her she's crazy she won't go. Sally pleads with her to at least tell Curly. Angie says she can't but will send him a letter later on.

Back in the Rovers, Betty is telling Rita about Raquel's impending departure to Croydon. Jack overhears and says he's confident Bet will put an end to it and Raquel won't be going anywhere. Just then Bet arrives laden down with shopping bags. Raquel tells her she needs to tell her something - in private.

In the back room, Raquel lays out her plans for modelling school. She says if she doesn't go now she never will and if she never goes she will always be left wondering if she ever could have 'made it'. All of Bet's 'motherly' instincts surface as she tries, from every possible angle, to talk Raquel out of going. Raquel rebukes all her attempts and finally Bet is convinced that Raquel is really going. She tells Raquel to take a later train so at least they can give her a good send-off.

In the café Steve fills Vicky in on the situation with his parents. Vicky tells him its important to remain close to both his Mum and Dad even though it's Jim he lives with. "Parents, who needs 'em?" he declares. Nice one Steve! He immediately apologizes to Vicky for his thoughtless remark.

In the Kabin, Angie is looking for some brown labels, the kind with string on them. Rita says she hasn't seen those in years but manages to find some within 30 seconds! Raquel walks in and invites Angie to her leaving do, it goes like this.

Raquel: You're invited if you want to come but I suppose you've got something else on, haven't you?

Angie: You what?

Raquel: Well I'm only telling you just in case you think you've not been invited. Well I suppose you know I'm leaving tonight for the modelling course, don't you?

Angie: Oh, right.

Raquel: Yeah, well no sarky comments because I haven't got time. Anyway Bet 's giving me a bit of a send-off.

Rita: Oh, so she's letting you go then?

Raquel: Well, she's given me her blessing, yeah. (to Angie) So you can't say you've not been asked and Rita's just heard me.

Angie: Well I can't come as it happens Raquel but I wish you all the luck in the world. It's a very brave thing you're doing and I hope you make it. And I really mean that.

Angie leaves Raquel rather stunned by the sincerity of her comments!

Jack plops two pints in front of Jim and Don announcing they are on the house in honour of Raquel's departure. (Poor Jack, he really seemed quite choked about Raquel going, very snarky not his usual chipper self). Curly comes in and is told about Raquel by J & D. He's quite put out about being one of the last to know, Raquel assures him she left him a note but if he came into the pub on his way home he won't have seen it yet.

Liz arrives having come to say goodbye to Raquel. She and Jim have a tense moment while Bet and Betty look on.

At the café flat, Angie gathers up the last of her things. She has a final look around, puts the keys on the counter and leaves.

Behind the bar, Jack and Bet are saying their goodbyes to Raquel. Jack still looks gutted over it. He gives her a hug and tells her to keep in touch.

Audrey, watching all this, bitches to Bet. "Rip-off, these modelling schools."

"Put a sock in it," snaps Bet.

"No, they see them coming, that's what I'm saying," Audrey retorts.

"You're saying what I'm thinking, now put a sock in it!"

Curly gives Raquel a hard time about going. Now he will have no one to be 'best-woman' to his best man at Reg's wedding. Raquel tells him to ask Angie again while she's in a good mood. "She was all sweetness and light to me earlier," offers Raquel. "What, Angie was?" Curly finds this difficult to believe. Not wanting to waste Angie's good mood however, he asks for a bottle of wine (white) to go.

Out in the Street, Des and Angie drive past the Rovers and Des pulls over in front of Curly's house. "Forget it Des, I'll miss me bus," says Angie, firmly. As Des' car rounds the corner by the Kabin, Curly exits the Rovers with his bottle of wine. Bye Angie.

Outside No. 13 Sally is putting out the milk bottles. She watches Raquel's taxi pull up outside the Rovers. Curly is walking towards his house, clutching his bottle of wine having received no reply at Angie's. He really is a tragic sight and Sally can't help but tell him that Angie is gone, to Mexico, possibly for good. Sally tells him how sorry she is and goes back inside, leaving Curly standing on the pavement, alone. Awwww, poor Curly! He turns around just in time to see Raquel hop into he taxi and drive away from the Rover's. Bye Raquel. The two women who mean the most to him - gone! Awwwwww.

End Credits.

Tammy Mitchell

Written by: TOM ELLIOT Directed by: ROMEY ALLISON

Friday (3590, Monday 6 September 1993)

Curly didn't waste time spreading the news about Angie's departure because Deirdre is telling martin all about it in the shop the next day. In the middle of telling Martin how sorry she feels for poor old Curly, in through the door walks. . . Poor Old Curly himself. Martin immediately asks about Angie. Curly glumly tells them that Angie isn't coming back. He thought they were pretty close but seeing as she didn't tell him she was going, maybe he was wrong and without another word or purchase, he turns around and leaves again.

Gail flips through Alma's holiday snaps (Florida) and catches Alma up with the goings on. Angie left the flat in good order, Raquel's gone to have another go at modelling and good luck to her and Audrey's not only decided against Lytham, she's gone and got herself a job. Incredulous, Alma reacts Audrey?? A Job!?? Working!!!??

Yep. But Alf still thinks the novelty will soon wear off and how come she never dressed up like that to work with him in the shop? Because he never took any notice and thought if you were selling sacks of potatoes, you might as well look like one is her sarcastic retort. Not so, but anyway Alf starts in again, calling the job a whim but he's dismayed when she takes the car again today because he *might* want to go somewhere. She tells him to walk, it'll do him good and leaves before he can raise any more objections.

Mike is wasting no time back on about schools and is trying to interest alma in a brochure he has. She's really not interested and doesn't see the point when Mark has a perfectly good school now. But when she starts asking about the cost of the school he changes the subject and calls Maggy for a meeting later today.

Jack's complaining about the extra work for no extra money. Betty asks Bet if she's going to take on a new barmaid. Bet allows she could do with one but rather than hiring an inexperienced young girl, as Jack suggested, she wants to wait until she can find someone who knows the ropes and who will fit in with them all. If it takes a little longer, they'll just all have to pull together a bit more. Neither Jack nor Betty seem overly enthused about that idea.

Over at Bettabuys, a po-faced Curly answers a price check for Amy and then mistakes a young woman wearing a funky hat for Angie and has to apologize profusely before sloping off down an aisle, in a worse mood than before.

The For Sale sign is being fixed over the shop once more, with the Widow Scott smiling across the road at Reg before she goes inside. Deirdre is worried about the shop as the stock is getting low and they are having to turn customers away but The Merry Widow isn't bothered, let it run itself along until it's sold. Deirdre asks for a bit of time to go have her lunch. Debi is not inclined until Reg enters and finally allows Deirdre a half hour, no, make it 20 minutes if you can. See she's bound and determined not to spend any more time than she has to behind the counter. Lucky Brendan left a good life insurance policy. Reg is smarmy and flirty as usual, offering all his expertise and knowledge of the market to help her get shot of the shop as soon as possible.

Mike brings Maggy to the Oakhill Grammar School. She's nearly fed up to the teeth with his ideas on education but he persuades her to have a look, as they're there anyway. When they later come out he does get her to agree in principle that Mark can go there, and can start Monday but she insists, only if Mark likes it and wants to go. Mike smiles triumphantly.

In the Rovers, Percy is working on offending for England, much to Bet's consternation and Emily's mortification. "I don't go into a pub to stare at a pretty face. I'd be just as happy with you serving me, Mrs. Gilroy!" LOL! Percy is mystified when they are offended. At another Table Vicky is in raptures over the food in Hong Kong while Steve just looks on with a raised eyebrow. Fiona is sitting at the next table with a friend who has a 6 inch high weave that's falling over in front of her face and looks "dread"ful! (ok, I couldn't resist! LOL!) When Vicky goes glass-collecting to help Bet, Fiona makes some crack to Steve about him looking as if he wished she'd stayed in HK.

Jim comes in to the shop for a bag of sugar which does happen to be on the shelf. Deirdre mentions seeing his gutted reaction to Liz last night in the pub and assures him that it will get better. She speaks from experience. Jim isn't' so sure but all he does is remark that drink and work are his life now, only sometimes one gets in the way of the other. (either/or I would say).

Back in the café, Gail and Alma are cleaning up and listening to Mike witter on snobbishly about education and yes, he eventually mentions "Barlow" and that lot. It's a wonder he hasn't worn a mucky mop upside his face judging from the long suffering frustrated reaction he gets from Alma. He still won't talk about the cost of it though and leaves as soon as Alma brings it up again.

Later in the back, Vicky is still gabbing to Steve about Hong Kong until he peevishly thinks she probably didn't want to come back. They have hardly seen each other at all this summer. She accuses him of being jealous. He wonders why she even bothers going back to school, she could do anything. Like what, she challenges. Anything, what does she want to do, he challenges back. She looks reflective but doesn't answer as the scene fades out for an ad break.

In the pub tonight, Gail and Martin share a drink. Reg blows in with Curly on his heels, whinging about how he doesn't really want to be there and moaning about Angie. Reg has long lost patience and points out that Curly has a store full of fresh young "talent" at his fingertips and he their boss! Is he suggesting Curly ought to abuse his power? Reg snorts and questions what power is for if you can't abuse it! Alf and Audrey arrive, arguing about her taking the car and all the usual nit picking Alf has been doing lately. They join Deirdre who tells them that the shop is losing trade. Alf seems a little sad to see "his" shop go down but is looking forward to Lytham which elicits another sharp insistence from Audrey that she's not going.

Elsewhere Reg tells Curly that he sees his career as dead ended, having no friends at head office and plans to take the golden handshake and buy the shop off the Widow. He's going to be her friend and financial adviser, making sure she knows how dead the market is so he can then offer to take it off her hands at a bargain price! That's diabolical, Curly exclaims. Reg smirks and somehow I think this is going to backfire on him big time in more ways than one! Over at the bar Mike is boring for England on the subject of a good education and Jim contradicts him. Weatherfield Comp did just fine for his Andy who's making something of himself and going to university. (Oh, God, there's that Soap Opera Phrase Of Doom again! SOPOD alert!!)

Andy has helped put little Dominic to bed with an extra story and come back out to cuddle on the sofa with Amy. She'll miss him when he goes back to school and he drops the bomb. He's decided he's not going to do his last two years. He's going to get a job and get on with the rest of his life, and that includes her!!

Diane Johnston

Debi Scott LESLEY CLARE-O'NEILL Dominic Nelson LEON ANWAR Amy Nelson LOUISE DUPREY


Originally transmitted: 8, 10, 13, 15 & 17 September 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 17 - Friday 21 July 2000
Episode Numbers: 3591 - 3595

Monday (3591, Wednesday 8 September 1993)

At Grasmere Drive, Alf is clearing the breakfast table, while Audrey makes the finishing touches to her appearance, before leaving for her new job. Alf is concerned that she'll be late this evening for his farewell 'do' at the Queen's, with this job of hers, and he's exasperated that she doesn't seem to be very interested, not taking it seriously, since he's the guest of honour. Audrey is flippant, but actually, is more teasing him, than being sarcastic, which is what Alf believes, telling her that if she keeps up with her cracks, she'd better not come. Audrey tells him not to worry, that she wouldn't miss it for the world, and she'll be on time. She'll also be well behaved, and so pretty that she'll be the belle of the ball. They laugh, but she reminds him to wipe the egg off his chin before this evening, as she leaves.

Vera, resplendent in curlers and hairnet, is giving our Tommy his breakfast, as Jack noisily scrapes the bottom of an empty jar of marmalade, prompting Vera to warn him of electrocution - he's going to make sparks fly, if he keeps it up. Jack wants a new, full jar, and their usual bickering ensues, with Vera complaining of a lack of cash, and Jack all excuses. Vera has a plan, though. It's Tommy's first birthday tomorrow, and she's going to have a party, with the kiddies from the street as guests. Jack is disagreeable, as how will Tommy ever realise what it's all about? He's too young, and a party for just the three of them will be enough. Oh, no! Not for Tommy! "He's having a proper party, and not a cracked mug version like you'd give him, you skinflint," rules Vera, "so come on, cough up, or the next marmalade you'll get will be in the spinal injuries ward at Weatherfield General!" Jack concedes defeat, digs deep into a pocket, and hands over a note. Vera grins with delight that her ploy has worked, as she snatches it from Jack's hand. Our Tommy watches it all with interest from his high chair.

Emily is clearing the breakfast dishes from her table, too, as Percy reads his mail, and plans to attend a cricket match, before the end of the season. Emily thinks that is an excellent idea, and waxes idealistic over the leisurely, civilised pace of a cricket match - it's so British! However, Percy has disturbing news. Olive Clark, the widow of his old army mate, Nobby Clark, has sent them an invitation to her wedding. Percy is outraged - it's an insult to Nobby's memory! He's still warm in his grave! Emily demurs, and reminds Percy that he was going to propose to Olive, at one point. But he thought better of it, he tells her, and they've no right to get remarried at their age. Whoever this Edwin Turner is, he's got no moral fibre, and Olive has also gone down in his estimation, too. So he won't be going to the wedding, then, wonders Emily? No, nor the cricket, either. "It's really put me off me stroke, has this," says a shaken Percy.

At Bettabuy's, Curly is hoping to get the long-awaited sales figures for the region's branches, from Reg, but instead, Reg has been working on the figures for all the corner shops in Weatherfield, pursuant to his plot to obtain ownership of the Corrie corner shop from the Widow Scott. He's dressed to the nines, all set to impress her at lunch with his executive expertise. Curly will have to wait for the Bettabuy's data - Reg has much lower things on his mind! In another aisle, Amy and Andy are discussing his plans to leave University. Andy is sure he can get a manager-trainee position at Bettabuy's, as Reg once offered him the chance, and it's a career, but Amy doesn't think it will be right for him, even though she's flattered. Andy thought she'd be pleased, but no. She doesn't want to be blamed for him throwing away his education when they break up in three or four years. This takes Andy aback, but he counters with the fact that a degree doesn't guarantee a good job, so why waste two more years, when he could get a start now? Amy reminds him that he's still young, and could change in two years, and regret dropping out. "So, I'm immature, is that it?" Andy responds. "No," answers Amy, "but on this, you need protecting from yourself." She's so serious, that she's ready to break up with him, if he goes through with it. "I'm not worth the sacrifice," she tells him, leaving him looking amazed.

In the corner shop, Deirdre is contemplating the denuded shelves and displays, when Vera bustles happily through the door, eager to prepare for our Tommy's birthday. Alas, since Mrs. Scott won't authorise fresh stock orders, there's nothing she requests available. Self-raising flour? No, just plain. Economy size package of crisps? No. Pink blancmange, icing sugar, marzipan? None of them - all they have are cake decorations, spelling out "Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year." "It's a birthday party, not Christmas," protests Vera. "Well, look on the bright side, Vera," responds Deirdre. "He can't read yet, can he?" Vera isn't amused.

Vicky is kissing Steve in the backroom of the Rovers', which prompts a "What's up?" from him. Vicky has to meet Bet for school clothes shopping, and Steve becomes very annoyed, having wangled the time off to be with Vicky. She didn't know he'd be free, and can't get out of the commitment, which doesn't placate him, since she has to return to school on Sunday - and why, he wants to know? She has to go to school she tells him, but he wonders why she can't go to a sixth form college, in Weatherfield. Her Granddad wouldn't allow it, and anyway, Steve would be too much of a distraction, wouldn't he? Steve won't be jollied out of his tantrum though, and tells Vicky that they might as well pack each other in, as they see so little of each other, and storms out in a huff. Quite an interesting contrast here between Amy's attitude to Andy's education, and Steve's attitude towards Vicky's - the unselfish versus the self-centred!

Percy is still Mr. Disgruntled in the café, and more so when Alma complains about him taking up space during a busy lunch hour, with only a cup of tea - most café's have a minimum charge! However, his tea is stewed, when he takes a sip, he complains, which is his own fault for not drinking it while it was still fresh, retorts Alma, and Percy hustles out in dudgeon, to go where his custom is appreciated! Gail is surprised at Alma, since the behaviour isn't like her, but she's tired of his constant moaning - every one else has problems, and just gets on with it! Ah. Gail knows what's up. Mike is taking Mark to see the private school, which he wants Mark to attend, this afternoon. Doesn't that depend on what Mark wants, asks Gail, but it's what Mike wants, that counts, is Alma's reply. Jim is waiting at the counter by now, and settles for a bacon sarnie, but his ears pick up when he hears Gail and Alma discuss Alf's do at the Queen's. Although it's supposed to be for councillors and such, now that the news is out, Gail expects that half the Street will be there, as no doubt, there won't be bouncers at the door keeping people out. Jim looks very thoughtful.

At another public establishment, Debi Scott and Reg are discussing the sale of the shop. The market for small businesses is very sluggish, Reg tells her, which, she agrees, the estate agent told her already, and had suggested an auction. Reg puts the idea down - a quick profit for the agent, instead of hard work getting the right value - and comments on the exorbitant commission they charge. However, when she asks if she should hold on to it, he backtracks, and tells her that it might be the right way to go, since it's not worth what it was - a flourishing concern - when Alf sold it to Brendan. Plus the fact that Brendan met his demise on the premises. It might be considered an unlucky shop, since shopkeeepers are as superstitious as sailors! "This is going to be more difficult than I thought," worries Mrs. Scott, but Reg rallies her. "No, you'll be alright, and I shouldn't be dampening your expectations, should I?" "It's best to be realistic," she thinks, and he agrees. "Forewarned is forearmed, eh? And I do have my fingers to the wind, after all," he assures her. "Absolutely! And I'm glad we've spoken," agrees Mrs. Scott, without a clue as to Reg's nefarious manipulations. Meanwhile, Maureen marches up to Curly in an aisle at Bettabuy's, looking for Reg. Poor Curly is put on the spot, and only tells her that Reg has a business lunch, and he doesn't know with whom. Maureen is concerned that she wasn't told, as Reg doesn't eat dinner when he's had a big lunch, and she's making his dinner, tonight. "How peculiar," she vaguely smiles, and toddles off, leaving Curly looking after her nervously. When we return to Debi and Reg, the beauteous blonde has shucked her glamourous cardi, and is a revelation in a skimpy red tank top, under which, she is, very obviously, not wearing any support! I do not know how Reg kept his eyes on her face, in this scene-score one for the self-control of the actor! However, he has her nicely confused, as she states that she doesn't know what to do now, and he agrees that retailing is a chancy business. She asks him what he would do, and he excuses his expertise, since he knows supermarkets, but not little corner shops, then conveniently notices the time. He must be in Bury, in twenty minutes, and she's much better informed now, though, but her decision is even more difficult, she tells him, and looks helpless. Reg helpfully suggests another meeting, for a more detailed chat, for which the poor woman is most grateful! This scheming is going so well for Reg that I just know that his downfall will be equally catastrophic, as usual!

Outside the Oakhill Grammar School, Mike is enumerating the advantages of the school, to Mark - the facilities, such as the computer room, and smaller classes, for more attention from the teachers, for example. That might not be so great, thinks Mark, but good for him, says Mike. Mark has to agree that the school is different from the Weatherfield Comprehensive, where it's hard to work, since everyone fools around, but he's more worried about making friends, because it's 'posh.' That's because they teach you to lead, Mike tells him. In twenty year's time, does Mark want to be the poor sap standing waiting for the bus in the rain, or the guy who drives by in a Jag, on his way to an important meeting? He tells Mark that he has to think he's the best, to get on. "You can keep your 'A' levels and degrees, they're nothing - ten a penny." It's that something extra that employers look for, and that's what this school will teach Mark, Mike argues-the first thing they'll ask you is what school you went to, he tells Mark. It's Mark's decision, but Mike is determined, and is an operator on a much more elevated plane than Reg Holdsworth. [Footnote: A Comprehensive school is the same as a North American High School, where all kids attend, no matter how varied their abilities-and unlike the old style British system, where kids were streamed, depending on their IQ, as measured by an exam called the 11+, taken at age 10+. They would be 11+ when they started at their secondary school. Grammar schools kids-the top 10%, or so, usually- took the equivalent of Grade 12 departmental exams, called 'A' level G.C.E.'s, for Advanced General Certificates of Education, at 18, and could then qualify for University entrance. This was changed many years ago, but vestiges of the old system remain, and this school is one of them-smaller classes, and better facilities than state schools, for those who can, or would prefer to pay the fees. The anachronism, is, that in England, a private fee-paying school is known as a public school, and has the cachet of upper class privilege. They also existed during the 11+ period, as it was almost declasse to pass the scholarship and go to a grammar school! Lot of snobbery, then, and still, as Mike's attitude shows. Sorry for the long digression, but I've seen questions about this often on the GB's, and thought it might be helpful for non-British readers.]

Emily is surprised to find Percy at home, when she returns with her shopping basket, but looks long-suffering when he starts off again about his virtues - such as honouring the memory of his late wife, and the sanctity of marriage, etc. Emily has had enough though, and tells him that it's very noble of him, but although she's very sorry that he's been disappointed, "do we have to have all this sanctimony?" Percy is shocked - he's only bemoaning declining standards - but Emily knows otherwise. "You're bemoaning the fact that Mrs. Clark said 'yes' to someone else after she turned you down," and tells him that it's all right to feel jealousy. Percy won't hear of it, and won't discuss the subject any longer.

Nicky Platt is sadly toying with the Ketchup squirt bottle at the café, anxious that his friend Mark will be moving on to the new school. The new math teacher at the Comp. can't keep order, and it's hard to concentrate, and do any work. He'll probably leave after a couple of months, and then there'll be a supply teacher, who'd be even worse, and he groans in despair. Gail and Alma exchange looks, and Gail comments on how academics are so interesting at the moment, just as Mike and Mark arrive. It's apparent from Mike's demeanour that Mark has chosen wisely, from his perspective. Mark parrots Mike's arguments, and they describe the advantages of the school to their audience. Nicky is sad, but Gail looks on the bright side. Mark isn't going away to boarding school, so they can still be friends. Of course, says Mike, there'll be no problem with that, and Mark asks Nicky, why should there be? Nicky just looks doubtful.

Alf hurries into the sitting room at Grasmere Drive, looking impatiently at his watch - where's Audrey? She enters the front door moments later, delayed because of a late delivery at work that she couldn't avoid, but Alf is angry that she's put her job before his 'do', and accuses her of doing it deliberately, determined to spoil things for him. Audrey is sorry, but exhausted, and, not anxious to argue, promises to shower and dress, and be there on time at eight o' clock. Alf responds that he'll find it very difficult to forgive her, if she isn't, as he puts his hat on and leaves post haste. Audrey looks too tired to care much.

Bet and Vicky return to the Rovers', loaded with packages, and Bet thinks that school outfitters make more brass than those who run pubs, anyday. She asks Vicky if gymslips are designed by a haut couturier, but Vicky laughs and tells her that these are the last school clothes she'll need to buy, ever. Behind them, in a booth, Steve and Fiona are chatting and laughing together. As Vicky goes behind the bar she notices him, and calls, but all he does is glance at her in acknowledgement, and turns back to Fiona, leaving Vicky at a loss. Jim is at the bar, nicely dressed in a dark suit, and Jack teases him about being dressed for the kill, to see a lady, no doubt, and extols the thrill of being free for the chase. Jim isn't amused, however, and responds with insincere jocularity. Vicky returns to the bar, from the back, as Fiona leaves the pub, and tells Steve that he looked very friendly with Fiona. We are friends, he replies, but Vicky can't leave it alone. "Are you sure it's nothing more than that?" she asks, teasingly, but his reply upsets her. "Yeah, well, you'd only have yourself to blame, if there was," he says snidely, and takes off through the door. What a total jerk Steve is, over this issue of her staying on at school! Manipulative cad! Bet ambles over to Jim, and compliments him on the adult way that he and Liz have handled their break up. She recommends that he look to the future, since he's still a young man. Once again Jim is made uncomfortable, and makes a non-committal reply.

At the Queen's, Alf is reminiscing with Rita, and greeting well wishers. It's been twenty-six years, that he's been a councillor, apart from the brief period when Deirdre took his seat. The creepy Harry Potts sidles up, and makes complimentary remarks, but soon comes to the point. He's after Alf's parking spot, but Alf sharply reminds him that he's leaving Weatherfield only, not the Council, just yet. In the background, Jim arrives, and watches Liz joke with Gail and Martin, who complement her on the success of the catering. Liz is happy and in her element, and offers to be available for their silver wedding, but they all also comment on Audrey's non-appearance. Martin jokes that she's probably late night shopping. Meanwhile, Deirdre notices Jim, and asks him about his presence, since he's barred. He only wants a quick word with Liz, and he'll be off, he tells her. Gail asks Alf if Audrey is coming, and if they've had a row. She'll be here soon, he impatiently answers, but the scene shifts to their living room, where Audrey is fast asleep in the chair she sat down in as Alf left the house, earlier. She wakes, and horrified at the time, rushes to the telephone. At the Queen's, Colin answers the ring, and calls Alf to the phone. Audrey explains that she fell asleep, and will shower and be right over, but Alf has lost all patience by now, and believes that she's only making excuses, so that she doesn't have to come. She argues that she'd not have rung, if that was the case, but he tells her to forget it. It's obvious she doesn't want to come, and will only make sarcastic remarks. Audrey denies it, but if she'd wanted to come she'd have been there long ago, Alf tells her. "The fact is, you've no interest in anything that's of importance to me, so you might as well stop at home! I'll see you tomorrow," he ends, and hangs up. Audrey doesn't seem to mind too much, and mutters, "Oh well, suit yourself, if that's the way you want to play it," to herself. At the Queen's, Alf is very upset. Liz is shocked to find Jim at her elbow, but he begs for a word. He's just as het up as Alf it's clear, and tells Liz of Bet's comments. It's all a façade, as inside, he's not grown up and calm, but screaming like a child, for her. It's over, she tells him, but he asks why? "I'll be anything, or do anything, just so long as we can be back together," he cries. "You? Change?" she almost jeers at him. "I swear, Liz! I'll change! I love you!" he tells her desperately, but she has a life of her own and she's very happy with it. "With him? You can't be happy with him?" Jim blusters. "Well, I am," Liz cries, "and it's time you started sorting a life out for yourself, without me! And the sooner the better," she tells him, and turns away in exasperation. Jim looks after her in disbelief. Poor Jim.

Ruth Hempsey

Amy Nelson - LOUISE DUPREY Vicky Arden - CHLOE NEWSOME Debi Scott - LESLEY CLARE O' NEILL Mark Redman - CHRIS COOK Nicky Platt - WARREN JACKSON Fiona Middleton - ANGELA GRIFFIN Harry Potts - RUSSEL DIXON Tommy Duckworth - DARRYL EDWARDS
Written by - MARTIN ALLEN Directed by - MERVYN CUMMING

Tuesday (3592, Friday 10 September 1993)

At Grassmere Drive, Audrey is rushing to get ready for work. Alf, in his dressing gown, is trying to have conversation about her absence the night before. All manner of people were there, the Mayor, the president of W.A.R.Ts. - everybody except the one person who should have been there. Audrey carries on getting her things together during this rant, determined not have an argument. "Well, you never never speak to me at these dos anyway" she says half smiling. "That's not the point!" He tells her he felt betrayed because she wasn't there. Audrey replies bemusedly she doesn't know why because the only reason she wasn't there was because he told her not to bother. Alf still doesn't accept her explanation that she fell asleep. He tells her that people were asking after her health and that everyone would be drawing conclusions that something isn't right between Councillor Roberts and his wife. "Well," laughs Audrey, "if any of them do work something out would you please get them to explain it to me! Ta'ra!" She leaves for work before Alf can say any more.

Jim has managed to find something to buy from the rapidly depleting stock at the late Scott's Emporium. Deirdre asks him if he had a good time at Alf's retirement party. Jim tells her he wasn't there to have a good time but to have a word with his wife. Deirdre comments that Liz was so busy she hardly had time to speak to anyone. "Oh well she found time for me, to her credit," says Jim sarcastically. "She not only told me to stay out of her boozer, she told me to stay out of her life altogether! Isn't that nice?" is his parting shot as he leaves. Deirdre looks concerned. Jim's remarks are heard by Ken who entered the shop at the start of this conversation but he says nothing and on seeing Gail asks her if Nicky is happy to be back at school. "Oh I think so," replies Gail "But Mark leaving has been a bit of a blight." This is news to Ken. Gail tells him Mark is off to a private school* (see note below credits). Ken tells her he is Mark's form tutor and he would be the first to know if he was leaving. "Mike may have talked about it, but he talks about all sorts of things that never happen. No, Mark's at Weatherfield and I think I can promise you that's where he'll be staying." Gail says nothing at this assurance except "Well Nicky will be delighted!" as she moves towards the counter where Deirdre notices she has a birthday card from the Kabin in her shopping basket. Deirdre picks up the card. "One, eh? Anybody we know?"

Cut to the Birthday Boy himself - RTommy! Jack is helping Tommy open his cards. Vera is delighted that Terry has sent his son a card (even though it is from the Big House). She wishes Terry could be there to see his son growing up. "I hope he's growing up," says Jack under his breath. He goes to show Tommy another card but Vera wants to know if he'll be there for the party at lunchtime. Jack looks relieved to have the legitimate excuse that he'll be working. "Unfortunate, but there you are." He goes to put another card on the pile but Vera wants to know who it's from and takes it from him. It's from Des and Jack holds his breath but Vera is feeling magnanimous and won't take offence. "I didn't say don't send him a card, anyone can send him a card." Jack lets his breath out. Vera tells him Sally is bringing Rosie and the other kids she looks after. "And before you say anything about the cost, I'm not letting the day go by without making an occasion of it." Jack knows he is beat. "I'm saying nowt about owt." "Only because you know it won't get you anywhere. Now, shift!" retorts Vera. Jack sighs. He knows. He shifts.

At number three, hostilities have not ceased between Emily and Percy. This prompts vigorous cleaning activity by Emily using the largest weapon at her disposal - the vacuum cleaner. Percy's arsenal cannot match this and he has to remove himself from the line of fire. "Well, before you go out," shouts Emily over the din, "what do you want me to do with this?" She waves Olive Clarke's wedding invitation at Percy. "Do what you like with it. I'm not bothered." Emily is exasperated. "Right!" she throws the invitation on the table. Percy tells her if Nobby Clarke's widow wants to give herself to another man she can do so without him standing by watching. "You'd prefer that she'd thrown herself on is funeral pyre, I suppose!" Percy remarks that sarcasm is not Emily's usual style. Emily agrees but "just occasionally I think circumstances demand it!" "You still think I proposed to her!" accuses Percy. Emily says she does. Percy declares he is doubly disappointed, first in widow Clarke's behaviour and then in Emily's. "Thank you!" Emily stands her ground and opens fire with the hoover again. Seeing him still in the doorway she turns the vacuum cleaner off. "What?" she demands. Percy wants to know if she wants anything while he's out. "No," Emily is firing on all cylinders. "Not unless you're going anywhere where the truth is on offer!" The vacuum resumes firing on one cylinder. Percy is out- maneouvred.

At Bettabuys, Andy is manoeuvring himself around Amy. He tells her he will return to university like she wants him to. "So, does that mean we can still see each other or what?" Amy tells him not to get smart. "Do you think you can say that and it makes everything all right?" Andy is surprised at this reaction. "Well, yes. Well, no it makes everything all wrong for me but if that's what you want. . " Amy is realizing this is getting out of hand. She tells him she doesn't want him throwing away his future because of her. "You are my future," he tells her. Amy groans. "Oh sorry," Andy is sarcastic, "I'm not allowed to say things like that, am I? In case I make you feel guilty about destroying this glittering career I've got before me . . . They are interrupted by Curly who doesn't want to crack the whip but. . Andy tells Curly he was just asking Amy if he could see her after work. Curly puts Amy on the spot by asking her to give Andy her answer so that the mighty wheels of commerce can continue turning. Amy reluctantly gives in and Curly sends Andy off the retrieve some trolleys. Sensing that Amy was discomfited by his intervention, Curly awkwardly tells her that he is not just the manager, the man in the suit. That he has been through the emotional minefield. If she wants to talk, or wants advice, his door is always open. Amy tells him thanks. Her face tells us she is wondering what advice Curly could possibly give her on emotional matters.

The birthday party is in full swing and full marks to the Director for actually providing a realistic party scene of four little tots sitting around the table in their party hats. Sally also is wearing a fetching blue and white hat. She notes how big Tommy is growing. "Like 'is Dad," says Vera proudly. Sally asks how Terry is and Vera tells her she hopes he'll be out of prison and home by Christmas. Vera answers a knock at the door and is surprised to see Doreen and Jeff Horton (Lisa's parents) on the doorstep. Vera recovers quickly as Doreen apologizes for turning up unexpectedly but they would like to see Tommy on his birthday. Vera's magnanimity genes are working hard today. She smiles and welcomes them in. Sally is introduced to Tommy's other grandparents (background party hooter provided courtesy of Jonathan's ample lungs) and the Hortons are asked to stay for tea. Doreen has a present for Tommy. "So, where's your Jack got to then?" enquires Jeff. Vera turns away and raises her eyes.

Audrey is in Jim's cafe having her lunch break and a moan to Gail about Alf. "He's determined to retire to Lytham. I suppose I'll be left living in cardboard box." Gail reminds her she wanted Alf to retire. "I did, I do," says Audrey. "I just didn't expect to have to spend every minute of every day with him!" Audrey asks Alma if she'd like to spend every minute with her husband. On receiving a definite "Yes" Audrey tells her she doesn't believe her. Alma suggests that surely they'll find their own interests but Audrey assures her that Alf will have them walking the prom at Lytham chained to each other. She'll never be able to get away from him!

It's also lunchtime for Steve. Vickie has set up a private table for him in the back room of the Rovers. Steve is suspicious but Vicky says she wants him all to herself instead of sitting in the bar. Betty barges through on her way to the kitchen. Vicky tells Steve she doesn't want to go back to school with him still mad at her. He denies he's mad but he is miffed that he won't get to see her very often. "It's only for another two years," says Vicky. "Only? Only two years?! (Betty barges back carrying hot pots) Steve and his hormones are not impressed. "We'll just have to make the most of the time we've got left," responds Ms Practical obliviously.

In the bar Bet requests a report from Betty. "I think she's giving him his dinner." "Well, just as long as he isn't giving her a hard time back," snaps Bet. Jeff enters the Rovers and greets Jack. He suggests they have a drink together to celebrate Tommy's birthday. Jack readily agrees to accept this olive branch. Bet asks Percy if he wants another drink. He refuses and turns to go but not before telling Bet that what folk don't understand about Mrs. Bishop is that she can be very unsympathetic at times. "Very hard. Hard on herself and hard on others." He turns and leaves. Bet wonders what Percy is on about. (Something is preying on his mind.) Rita and Deirdre approach the bar. Deirdre lets Rita twist her arm to have another drink. Deirdre is fed up with being left to cope with the shop on her own but her moan is interrupted by Jim who wants a quick word with her. He wants her to know that he's thought about what he said in the shop that morning and he was overreacting to the situation. He shouldn't have expected Liz to be able to sit down and talk to him in a bar full of people. (It looks like Jim doesn't understand some part of the word 'no'.)

Jack and Jeff raise their glasses to their grandson. Jeff expresses the hope that they might be able to arrange for Tommy to spend a few days in Blackpool. Jack is negative. "Our Vera'll never let him out of her sight." But Jeff is actually proposing that they all come to Blackpool and have a family holiday together. Now that's more like it! Jack beams.

At Betterbuys, Andy is now the recipient of Curly's new caring, sharing management style. Curly is giving him the same speech that went down so well with Amy. However Curly is interrupted by Reg breezing in to see Maureen which he does after a very cursory nod to managerial etiquette by asking Curly's permission but not waiting for an answer. Reg has come to tell Maureen that their date with a Beef Bourguignonne at her house this evening will have to be postponed because he has to attend an regional seminar in Manchester and won't be back until late. Maureen is disappointed but agrees it's better to wait for a suitable evening.

Jack and Jeff arrive back home just as the birthday party guests are leaving. Vera notes to Doreen how the men timed that well. The subject of the trip to Blackpool is broached with Vera. Doreen explains that her sister has a boarding house just round the corner and that they could stay there and have a break and Doreen and Jeff would be able to see more of Tommy. "And it wouldn't cost you a penny!" Jeff declares. Vera is not sure. "What have you said?" she quizzes Jack. He tells her he was leaving the decision up to her. "But it's nice, I think it sounds very nice." "Sounds nice to me 'n all!" Vera beams. The magnanimity genes shift to overdrive.

Ken has come to Jim's Cafe to eat crow. Since this is not on the menu he has to bring it with him in the form of an apology to Gail. He was wrong about Mark. No one had informed him that he was leaving for another school. Apology over, Ken can't resist a rant against Mike for the benefit of Alma. "What does your husband think he's doing? Taking Mark away from a perfectly good school where he's settled in with his mates and sending him to an establishment which he knows nothing about. It could be a den of vice for all Mike knows!" Ken recants this last remark realizing it is OTT. "Well not a den of vice, probably a rather shoddy second rate establishment trading on people's snobbery. Why?" Alma can't answer him but she admits to Gail after Ken has left, "The awful thing is, I agree with everything he said."

Back in the trenches at number three, Percy is prepared to hoist a white flag. He tells Emily that what she said about not going to the wedding because Mrs Clarke turned him down hurt him. Emily tells Percy she is sorry and didn't mean to. He then admits to Emily that Olive Clarke did turn him down, Emily was right about that. But, he was glad he was turned down because he proposed to her for the wrong reasons and Olive could see that. Emily looks puzzled but Percy continues to explain that he and Nobby were mates and supposing they were walking in the desert and Nobby fell then Percy would feel obliged to carry Nobby's pack. Emily's face shows a glimmer of horrified understanding. "And Nobby had fallen and Olive was his pack?" "You've hit the nail on the head," Percy tells her. "I was afraid I had. . " Emily sinks onto a dining chair. "The proposal was misplaced loyalty," Percy continues. "Good job the pack turned you down." Percy agrees. A truce is arrived at. Emily wants to know how Percy feels about the marriage now. He tells her he still against it. "So you won't be going?" "Oh I think we should go," replies Percy. "Someone's got to make her see sense!" (Get yer 'ead down Sugden!!)

Audrey is startled from sleep on the sofa. Alf wants to know if this is what happened last night. He's been watching her nod off. "Well that's all right for you because you're working but I'm retired," he tells her. "I want to go out for a drink and I can't because my wife's fallen asleep." (I will refrain from making obvious remarks here) Audrey can't stand this and she jumps up and says they will go out. Alf wants to know why she didn't have this attitude last night. "Because I didn't have you here to torment me!" Audrey feigns enthusiasm. "I'll have a bath and then we can go out. Together. Ooooo!!!!" She hugs him and flounces out of the room.

Reg has been telling porkies. There is no management seminar in Manchester. He has given up Maureen's Beef Bourguignonne for the the Bows,Baubles and Buxomness of Brendan's comely widow whom we see being ushered into Reggie's Bachelor Bedsit. Debbie Scott peels off her red jacket to reveal a red dress that she is barely wearing. While Reg is getting drinkies, Debbie asks him about auctioning the shop. Reg tells her that's not a good idea. He has the answer to her problem - just wait until he gets the refreshments organized. Operation 'Dupe the Widow' is under way.

At the Rovers Vera is having misgivings about the Hortons' intentions. Jack tries to reassure her. He tells her the Hortons aren't terrorists, they just want to see more of their grandchild. Anyway there's a free, gratis and for nothing holiday in Blackpool at stake. Rita appears and notes that Vera is a stranger to the Rovers nowadays. Vera reminds her she is usually looking after Tommy but Ivy's got him for an hour. Vera is surprised when Rita remembers it's Tommy's birthday but Bet, overhearing the conversation, reminds Vera that it's also the date of Ted Sullivan's death. Rita says that she's shed enough tears for today, "So let's all call it Tommy's birthday and have a drink." Audrey and Alf enter and are invited to join the birthday drink. Bet asks Alf how retirement is going. Alf tells her he'd prefer it if his wife retired with him. (I bet he would!) He then launches into a philosophical argument that it's the duty of people his age to retire as soon as they can in order to give the young folks a chance. Audrey disagrees. She suggests the young people go and walk on the seafront at Lytham. "And see how they like it day after day." Andy and Amy are having a serious talk. Amy wants to know what his parents think about him not returning to university. Andy isn't sure they think anything. He doesn't care what they think. He tells Amy that doesn't matter, he can't force her to live with him or marry him but that what he wants. What did he say? Marry??? He is as surprised as Amy is. Amy looks positively gobsmacked. Steve appears and wants to buy them a drink. He is unaware of the heavy nature of the conversation he's broken into. However Bet soon snags Steve and reminds him he's supposed to be taking Vicky out. Andy tells Amy that the only thing their relationship is about is that he loves he and he wants to be with her. Amy is not convinced.

Maureen is struggling with the hatch-back of her car. It's raining and she asks Curly to assist her. She is trying to hold a casserole dish and an umbrella and close the car. She tells Curly that she is going to surprise Reg by leaving the previously cancelled beef bourguignonne on his kitchen table so he will find it when he returns from working late. She will leave a love note with it. She wonders if Curly thinks she's silly. "No, I think it's wonderful that you're going to all this trouble," Curly tells her. "Well he's worth it," she simpers and dashes off through the rain.

The object of Maureen's affections is closing in on his goal. Having softened up the Widow Scott with alcohol and tales of doom in the commercial property market, he moves in for the kill. "Well everything does seem to be against you. . . (assent from Debi) . . so I thought, well . . (casual throwaway style as he adjusts his specs) . . I thought I could buy it. The red slapper bites, "How much?" Reggie leans back on the sofa expansively. "Well I could quibble and try to beat you down but no. .(quizzical look over top of specs) . . I am prepared to offer you a full £48,000 "When Brendan paid £68,000!! Ha! You didn't think I knew that did you!" Debi rejects the bait. Now Reg is on the hook. He squirms. "What Brendan bought was an established business.." Debi cuts him off. "£48,000 is not enough!" Reg attempts to mollify, "You think I'm trying to take advantage of you?" "I think you're trying to!" Debi is not quite the ageing bimbo she appears. "No, no, no," Reg wheedles. (Appearance of Maureen in the hallway outside the living room. She has let herself in to leave her little love token of beef in red wine.) "No one is trying to take advantage of anybody. (Maureen stops in her tracks) It's what we both want. (Maureen can't believe her ears, her face crumples) . . and afterwards I think I can promise you, (sotto voce) you'll have no regrets. . " (now where has Maureen heard this before?) "She won't BUT I HAVE!" Maureen's voice breaks into a sob as appears in the doorway. "You couldn't see me tonight because of work? Well, we know what kind of work don't we?" She waves her dripping umbrella at Miss Bettabuy 1977 and turns to leave, clutching her casserole. Reg jumps up from the sofa. "Maureen! Listen to me!" But Maureen rounds on him. She is armed and in 'woman scorned' mode. "No! I'll never listen to you again! Because you're a cheat! (brandishes brolly) And a liar! (lunges with weapon) And I'am glad I found out in time! (scores palpable hit on the protesting Reg who tries to follow) "You've got it all wrong, Maureen! Maureen!" The door slams and a rueful Reg returns to the living room. "Oh dear," says the Lady In Red trying not to laugh. Reg sighs, his scheme to get his hands on the shop has gone awry. Will he ever get his hands on Maureen again? Not if Maude has anything to say about it.

Libby Seekings

Doreen Horton ANNIE RAIT Jeff Horton DICKEN ASHWORTH Debi Scott LESLEY CLARE O'NEILL Tommy Duckworth DARRYL EDWARDS Jonathan Broughton TOM LEWIS
Written By PETER WHALLEY Directed By MERVYN CUMMING

*For those of you who are now thoroughly confused about public and private schools in Britain note that Gail does not say that Mark is going to a public school. This signifies that although he is going to a school where fees are paid it is not one of the "top drawer" private schools which are called "public schools" in Britain. This is a subtle point which accounts for Ken's scornful remarks in the later scene. Mike had his sights set on a public school like Eton but having found out the cost of that type of school plus Maggie's opposition to Mark leaving home he is happy to settle for a more modest establishment which nevertheless will cost quite a lot of money.

Wednesday (3593, Monday 13 September 1993)

Ah, morning on the street. We begin with view of Curly's backside - he's peering under the hood of Reg's car. A frustrated Reg, who looks like he lost the battle with his razor that morning, is having no luck getting the car to start. Curly suggests that he's flooding the engine. This is met with predictable enthusiasm. Reg leaves the car and joins Curly in gazing at a dead motor, while Curly reels off all the possible reasons why the car isn't cooperating -- battery, electrics, or the fuel pump. Reg claims it's the wrath of the gods, who are out to get him, and during his rant lets slip that Maureen suddenly visited him just as he was "concluding intimate negotiations with the widow Scott." "What do you mean?" Curly asks. Reg tells him he was moments away from securing a very reasonable purchase price for the shop. "Mrs. Scott's other assets couldn't have been further from my mind," he declares. "I'll bet," says a skeptical Curly. "You have a mucky mind, and so does RMaureen," Reg says. "Anyway, can't you get this thing going?" Reg points to the car. "In a word, no," is Curly's reply, and tells him to get a mechanic. As Curly leaves, he asks Reg if things are off with Maureen. "No," insists Reg, because Maureen will see how hasty she's been. Reg spots Jim MacDonald opening the garage, rushes over, and asks him to look at the car.

Tracy gets up late to an earful from Deirdre, who has called her several times. "Where were you last night? It was gone 1:00 when I heard the door go." "Out," is Tracy's terse reply. "Out where?" probes Deirdre. A typical mother-daughter row ensues, with an angry Tracy offering Deirdre money toward the phone bill because if she pays her way she can do what she likes. This pushes a worried Deirdre over the edge, and she breaks down as she says that she could be out of a job any day. Bills keep getting pushed through the door, bills that Tracy has help run up. She abruptly leaves the house to go to work, leaving a contrite Tracy behind.

It's Mark's first day at his posh new school. Proud pop Mike drops him off and gives him some spending money.

At Bettabuys, Reg tells Curly it was the spark plugs. Curly tells him that quite a few of the girls have booked off sick, which is why he's stuck with a price gun in his hand. Most importantly, Maureen has booked off, and when Curly asked her about her symptoms, she burst into tears. Andy and Amy seem to spend more time at work talking than working, and have another conversation about their relationship. Andy wants to know where he stands. Amy agrees to meet him in the canteen during dinner hour.

At the back of the store, Reg calls Maureen using his cell phone, but gets Maude, who rakes him over the coals and refuses to believe his protestations of innocence. When Reg asks her to put Maureen on, Maude tells him that Maureen doesn't want to speak with him, without even telling Maureen that Reg is on the phone. She tells Reg that Maureen never wants to see him again. After telling him not to phone again, she hangs up on him. Reg immediately calls back. Maude quickly unplugs the phone, hoping Maureen won't realize that Reg is trying to get in touch. She has quite a turn when Maureen suddenly enters the room carrying a tray of tea. Seeing her mother's face, Maureen rushes to her, asking if she wants a tablet. Maude plays the sympathetic mother and says, "I'll be alright. I don't like seeing you upset." Maureen sits herself down and asks who had just called. Maude tells her it was a wrong number, which upsets Maureen, who doesn't understand why Reg hasn't phoned. "He's bound to know I'm not at work by now. You'd think he'd just ring and try to explain himself." "He'll be out gallivanting with his fancy piece," a malicious Maude says. "I always told you you shouldn't trust him." "What if I'm jumping to conclusions?" an anguished Maureen asks. "You saw him with your own eyes," Maude reminds her. "I know, but there might be a perfectly simple explanation," says Maureen. Maude isn't about to lose the change to get rid of Reg once and for all. "Why give you all this hooey about going to Manchester? You're too gullible, Maureen, that's your problem." She then proceeds to remind Maureen of all the times she's been taken in by men, which reduces poor Maureen to tears. Maude rolls over and pats her on the back. "Now, now, now, haven't we had enough waterworks for one day? At least you found out before it's too late, that's the main thing." This bit of motherly love results in out right wailing from Maureen.

Over at the happy Roberts household, the solicitor has rung to say that the house buyer isn't happy with the survey. Audrey is more concerned about what colour of nail polish to wear. Alf tells her to get a move on or she'll be late for work. Audrey explains how she serves a different clientele than Alf did, most of whom aren't even up, then admits that the manageress of the store isn't in that morning and has trusted her with the keys.

Reg is still trying to reach Maureen, with no joy. He gives up and tells Curly he'll have to go round that evening with flowers for Maureen and chocolates for the wicked witch of the west. He then tells Curly that he's off to the Hechmanwhite (?) branch on a "routine visit". Andy asks Mr. Watts if it's ok to switch his dinner time with someone else. Curly agrees, and then asks if Andy has read this month's company newsletter. A puzzled Andy replies no and then disappears, leaving Curly talking to himself. "Well," Curly says, "it may be my imagination, but I could swear they closed the Hechmanwhite branch months ago."

At the cafe, a proud Mike is crowing to Alma about how terrific Mark looked in his uniform, but Alma isn't interested, being run off her feet. Mike isn't deterred, and continues to witter on about all of the parents' cars. Gail says it won't be easy for Mark, having to make new friends, which sets Mike off about how much better it will be than Weatherfield Comp, and how Gail would have Nicky out of there in a shot if she had the choice. "Perhaps, but we don't have the choice," Gail says. "Not my problem," a smug Mike replies.

Deirdre has to turn away another disappointed customer at the shop -- Percy, who is looking for tinned salmon, corned beef, and biscuits. He hits the jackpot with oxtail soup. Reg arrives and tells Deirdre that he's going to take a quick inventory of the stock, which is news to her. She's even more surprised to hear that Reg plans to buy the shop. Percy discovers that the soup isn't exactly what he was looking for. Reg assures him that things are about to change. Mrs. Scott breezes in. Reg moves in for the kill. He reminds her that they agreed on a figure of £40,000. Debi Scott rounds on him. "We agreed to nothing of the sort. Really, Reg, you're even more stupid than Brendan thought you were. Trying to take advantage of a widow." For the second time this episode, Reg pleads his innocence, but Debi Scott is having none of it. She tells Deirdre that the shop is going to be put up for auction, because her solicitor said it's the best way to "avoid being ripped off by wily opportunists." Reg offers her £45,000. "They'll be by tomorrow to put the sign up," is the response, and to Deirdre, not to Reg. "Alright, £50,000," offers Reg, "and I'm only doing this out of respect for Brendan, you know." This is the last straw for Debi, who throws him out of the shop.

Andy and Amy meet for lunch. Amy asks Andy if he was serious when he said they should get married. "Course I was," is his instant reply. "Oh Andy, it's all completely straightforward for you, isn't it, and to hell with the consequences." Andy doesn't understand why she's upset. "We're two people who love each other. It's hardly going to spark off world war 3, is it?" "This isn't a fairy story, Andy, it's real life. It's complicated. I've got a child, for one thing." "Yes, I know, I've met him," says Andy. "He needs a dad, though," he adds. Amy points out that Andy's parents are hardly going to jump for joy when they hear that he's chucked university to shack up with a black check out girl with a kid. "Not when you put it like that," admits an amused Andy, "but if they're told that their son has been singled out for a top notch career in retail management, then they might like the idea that he's found Miss Right and decided to settle down." Amy wants to know what he's talking about. Andy says he has a few things to sort out before he breaks the news to the folks.

Curly bumps into Reg in the pub and asks him how the Hechmanwhite visit went. "Very quiet," says Reg. "Did head office ring you while you were there?" Curly asks. "They were trying to get a hold of you earlier on." "Did they say what they wanted?" an alarmed Reg wants to know. "They're not going to divulge the details to me. That's why they want you over there a-s-a-p. And I'd get a move on. It's been a while since they rang." Reg dashes out of the pub, leaving his almost untouched pint for Curly. Curly tells Jack that the secretary he spoke to gave away the information that they want Reg to stand in next week as manager at a branch that's known as the "Beirut branch". "They've got bullet proof glass around the cheese counter, and the reason they need a stand-in is because the last manager was savaged by a Japanese [? - sorry, didn't catch it] off one of the estates." Tanya Pooley walks in and asks for Mrs. Gilroy. "Tanya Pooley," she announces to Bet, extending her hand. "I've come to make your day. I hear on the grapevine you're looking for an experienced bar person of the highest caliber. You've just found one."

Back at the corner shop, Deirdre hangs up her apron and runs into Emily on her way out. Emily is looking for sugar, but they're sold out, Deirdre says, surveying all of the empty shelves. "We're sold out of just about everything, which is why I'm closing up for the afternoon. Debi Scott obviously doesn't give two hoots about the place so I fail to see why I should. I'm off job hunting." She tells Emily the shop is being auctioned off Friday week, and then who knows what will become of it. It could end up a kebob shop or a pizza parlor. "If I thought the new owners were going to offer me a job, I wouldn't care if they turned it into a massage parlor." "Surely you must be feeling some nostalgia," Emily says, but Deirdre says that she can't afford to. "Can't Tracy help out?" Emily asks. "Somehow, I doubt that," is Deirdre's reply.

Alf is on the phone arguing about the survey when Audrey arrives home. The buyers have pulled out! It's only 3 o'clock in the afternoon and Alf is wondering why Audrey is home so early. "It was very quiet so the manageress said I might as well get off home." "You're here at 3, no doubt took an hour off for your lunch. I don't know why you bother going there at all," Alf says, and then leaves the room, upset that the house sale has fallen through. "That's what she said," Audrey admits under her breath. Oops, it looks like RAudrey has lost her job.

At the cafe, Mike is grilling Mark about his first day at school. Mark seems unimpressed with the whole thing. Alma is reading the list of sports gear he has to have. Mike is more interested in talking to Mark but is disappointed when Mark tells him that the computer he used at Weatherfield Comp was better than the one at the new school ("It had a larger hard drive"). Nicky enters, and Mark rushes off to be with him. Alma is still working her way down the sports gear list, and reaches the bottom where it says that all the equipment is exclusively available at a posh shop in Manchester. Mike isn't really paying attention to what she's saying, as he's too busy watching Mark and Nicky. "It's going to cost you a fortune!" exclaims Alma. Mike is completely unconcerned and dismisses her comment.

Maureen has her wedding dress laid out on the sofa when Maude rolls into the room. She continues her assault on Reg, which upsets Maureen so much that she commences to rip apart her wedding dress, much to Maude's horror.

In the pub, Reg is telling Curly about his meeting at head office, playing it cool and telling Curly that he can't reveal "the precise nature of the his mission". Curly, knowing all about it, is unimpressed. Reg shows Curly the flowers he has bought for Maureen and the jelly babies he has for Maude. Tanya is already at work behind the bar. Bet tells Betty that she got a good reference off Liz, though Liz admitted that they didn't hit it off personality-wise. Tanya's been put on a week's trial. Jim comes in and makes a sarcastic remark to Bet about Tanya. Tanya tells Bet that Jim isn't a fan, and says she was caught in the cross-fire between Jim and Liz. Mike and Alma enter the pub bickering about money. Mike orders his usual, a large scotch. Alma looks completely miserable and orders a "new husband" before ordering a vodka and tonic. "This is the second proudest day of my life," Mike says. "The first being when I married you." "You can't get around me that easy," says Alma. "Something tells me it's the most expensive day of your life."

A dejected Deirdre arrives home with information about benefits. She is surprised to find Tracy in the kitchen, preparing their tea, which consists of beef burgers and beans. Tracy says they'll have a summit meeting to figure out how much she should be paying towards the bills, and apologizes for what happened that morning. They hug and make up, and then realize that something is burning. It's going to be very, very well done beef burgers for tea!

Reg arrives at Maureen's. Maude sees him through the window and announces to Maureen that he's "as brazen as you like". Maureen answers the door. Reg tells her he's been calling all day but Maude wouldn't let him talk to her. He would have been round earlier but he was called to head office. "Another regional seminar?" asks Maureen. They have a hushed conversation, with Reg still on the doorstep, trying to convince Maureen that he can explain. "Why don't you just let me come in?" he asks, handing her a rather pathetic bunch of flowers. Not surprisingly, Maureen asks, "do you think that's all it takes? Give them to blondie." She thrusts the flowers back at him. "I don't trust you anymore. I can't marry a man I don't trust. The wedding's off," she proclaims, handing him her engagement ring and closing the door on him. Reg rings the bell again, but Maude yells that he should "Sling yer hook, or I'll come out there with a bucket of cold water." A rejected Reg walks down the drive and tosses the flowers, jelly babies, and engagement ring into the dustbin on the sidewalk. He slams the lid down, but then has second thoughts and retrieves the ring. He gets into his care but it won't start. The credits roll with a frustrated Reg ending his day as it began.

Sarah Ettritch

Debi Scott - LESLEY CLARE O'NEILL
Written by MARK WADLOW Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Thursday (3594, Wednesday 15 September 1993)

Morning and McDonalds x3 leave for work. Jim walks to the garage, Andy catches a lift with Curly and Steve drives the delivery van to the T-shirt shop. That is, he makes a sharp right turn from in front of his house into the driveway and very short commute.

On the way to work Andy pesters Curly about a permanent position at Bettabuys. Curly says he'll see.

At Grassmere Drive Audrey is getting ready to 'leave for work'. She shouts upstairs to Alf that she's grabbing a cab. But Alf isn't upstairs he's up, dressed and ready to shuttle her to the dress shop. Audrey does some fast-talking and manages to worm out of the lift, she hurries off to catch her 'cab to work'.

Gail is hustling some would-be truants out of the café. Mike watches her and says he can't blame them if he had to go to Weatherfield Comp he'd bunk off too. "Toerags the lot of them" he announces. Gail tells him he's deluded if he thinks skiving doesn't go on at private schools and challenges him to go count the Oakhill blazers at the Arndale (Shopping Centre) right now. Of course Mike won't hear a word against the school and continues to wax lyrical about his beloved Oakhill. He fails to notice that Alma is quite annoyed over a letter arrived that morning, her maintenance contract for all the café equipment is being increased by 25% When she mentions it he tells her "just don't pay it" and leaves, visions of Oakhill still dancing in his head. Audrey comes in as Mike goes out, apparently she doesn't have to 'start work' till that afternoon so she's come to visit Gail and Alma.

In the lunchroom at Bettabuys, Amy and Ivy console Maureen over her bust-up with Reg. Ivy comments how hard it must be to cancel a wedding, making all those calls to the church, reception hall etc. Maureen says Maude wants to do all that (you can just bet she does too!). Poor Maureen is stuck somewhere between self-pity and self-doubt. She can't decide if she attracts 'these sort of men' naturally or if she inspires them to treat her like dirt. "Do I just breed pigs?" she asks Ivy.

Andy and Amy chat on their way back down to the shop floor. Andy tells her about asking Curly for a permanent job. She tells him she's rung the Housing Authority and they will get priority for a house because of Dom but they will need to provide £200 for a deposit. She asks him if he's sure he knows what he's doing. He assures her, yes.

Back at the café Alma, Gail and Audrey discuss the high price of tuition. Audrey asks Alma how much Oakhill is setting her back. Alma says, "I haven' t been told". Gail and Audrey are amazed she doesn't know and shove her towards the phone so she can call and find out, now!

In the shop, Rita comments how she's seen more stock at a car boot sale. Debi Scott breezes in, tells Deirdre the auctioneers are coming to put the sign up that afternoon, she gets the mail and the takings from Deirdre. Rita starts to tell her how sorry she was about Brendan but Debi just brushes it off and leaves. Not exactly the grieving widow! Rita asks Deirdre what she's going to do for a job. Deirdre starts to cry, she can't believe her whole life amounts to this, shop assistant! Rita tells her that 's not all there is to her life and she knows it. She offers to treat Deirdre to the Weatherfield cure-all - a liquid lunch in the Rovers.

Pre-opening at the Rovers and the staff lean against the bar having a cup of tea. Bet tells Tanya the 'punters' are nice there but not to expect the same crowd they get at the Queens. "Open them doors Jack and let the cattle in", says Bet as she clears up the tea things. As she carries the tray through to the kitchen she overhears Tanya say to Betty "I really like Bet, she's just not what I've been led to expect".

At Bettabuys Maureen is working the tills, Reg places a note on her cash register and asks her to please read it. Maureen rips off the till receipt and sticks it into a customer's bag along with Reg's note. "You read it," she says to the customer, "it will mean as much to you as it does to me!" The customer leaves with Reg in hot pursuit while Ivy and Curly watch and snigger from behind a shelf.

Behind the bar Bet asks Betty if she heard Tanya correctly earlier, Betty confirms she did.

Back at Bettabuys Maureen is having a full-on tantrum in the pop and squash aisle. Curly tries to calm her down and even suggests that she should hear Reg out. This is the last thing Maureen wants to hear and she turns on Curly accusing him of taking Reg's side then she continues with her Anti-Reg rant and finishes by telling Curly he can stick his job in the same place Reg can stick his wedding. (It's going to start getting crowded in there!)

Jack and Tanya have a laugh behind the bar as Jack tries to convince her he is Weatherfields's answer to Ricky Martin. "Fly me to the moon," he croons. "Get back to work," snaps Bet. In the same voice she asks Tanya to have a word with her before she leaves.

Maureen, a picture of despair, sits by herself at a table knocking back vodka and orange juice. Rita and Deirdre speculate over the source of her misery and decide she must be having cold feet over the wedding.

Jim orders 2 pints from Tanya. She tries to clear the air between them by pointing out she worked at the Queens a long time before Jim and Liz came along. Liz did not hire her nor did she ask to be sucked into the Liz/Colin/Jim business. She pays for his drink and they agree to a truce.

Ivy joins a very wasted Maureen who is now wallowing in self-pity. Ivy tells her she's in no fit state to work why not go home for a rest. "Going home is worse," wails Maureen "My mother is in her element. I can't stand the gloating". Ivy hands her the keys to No. 5 and tells her to go lie down there for a while.

Mike sits in the café while Gail and Audrey giggle behind his back. Finally, he asks them where Alma has gone. Looks like she had to dash out on an 'emergency shopping trip'. Mike leaves in a huff.

Bet and Tanya have a drink and Bet tries, very obviously and unsuccessfully, to get Tanya to talk about Liz. Tanya refuses to volunteer anything.

Maureen pays Curly a visit to apologize before she heads home. She's still pretty tanked up and Curly invites her in rather than leave her slurring and swaying on his doorstep.

Gail leaves the Kabin, crosses over to the stock-free shop and finds Audrey there. Gail tells her she thought she was at work. Audrey said she just had to unpack a few orders then Camilla sent her home because they were overstaffed. Gail asks when all this happened because she was at the café till 1:30 then according to Rita she spent half the afternoon in the Kabin. The penny drops. "You've lost your job haven't you? Did Camilla fire you?" Ha ha Audrey, busted. Audrey becomes all defensive, she was only fired because Camilla possesses poor management skills and accused her of spending more time trying on the merchandise then she did trying to sell it. "Anyway," meows Audrey, "if she'd spent more time on her appearance we might have sold more!"

At Curly's Maureen is still grovellingly apologetic. Curly offers an apology too; he shouldn't have interfered in her personal business. He hands her a glass of wine - red, uh oh!

At the Rover's Amy asks Andy, for the umpteenth time, if he's sure he knows what he's doing. He reassures her, again, yes!

Gail and Audrey enter. Audrey tells Gail she has decided to tell Alf she resigned (as if she'd tell him the truth!). Gail finds the whole thing hysterically funny. Enter Alma, who looks like she put a good few miles on Mike's credit cards judging by the amount of shopping bags she has. Good for her! A not-too-pleased Mike walks over to her,

"What exactly is all this about?"

"Oh just treating meself. Looking good, etc" she replies.

"How much money have you spent?" (The nerve!)

"Well, it's only a fraction of all the money I slave for and it's only a fraction of eighteen hundred quid a term!"

Mavis and Rita enter. Mave sees Reg and gives him her RSVP for the wedding and some wedding magazines for Maureen. Reg can't bring himself to tell her it's probably off.

At Curly's, Maureen is now beyond plastered; it looks like she'll be horizontal at any moment. She's horrified to discover she's drunk the whole bottle of wine and offers to go get another. Curly tells her there's no need. She plops down on the sofa next to him and tells him he's made her feel "pleasant, calm and really peaceful." (No, I think that was the six vodka and oj and the whole bottle of red). She grabs his arm and clutches it to her chest telling him how much he reminds her of Reg when he was younger. Poor Curly looks confused but a bit turned on. Maureen pounces on Curly and goes in for a snog. Curly offers no resistance.

In the pub Ivy and Reg have a heart-to-heart. Ivy tells Reg about the state Maureen was in (if he could see her now!!). Reg admits he doesn't want to lose her. Ivy tells him to "stop acting like a twerp then." (A twerp? Harsh words). Poor Reggie, he's very down and sighs to himself. Ivy, sensing her chance to go missionary with Reg, asks him "Have you thought of the power of prayer?"

Closing scene: Maureen is still pawing Curly. "Hang on, hang on, hang on" shouts Curly. Ah at least he's seen sense! He's not going to do the nasty with his boss' drunken fiancée is he? Of course he is, he just wanted to take off his glasses first!

Tammy Mitchell

Written by: PAUL ABBOT Directed by: EUGENE FERGUSON

Friday (3595, Friday 17 September 1993)

It's the gray light of the morning after. Curly is alone and plods down the stairs. He attempts to straighten the sofa cushions, most of which are on the floor after last night's activities. He finds a pierced earring on the carpet, the hard way, by stepping on it and emitting a yelp. Looking at it, looking around him and then ruefully at an empty wine bottle, he sighs. (And I must add here that when a very very drunk Maureen was all over him like a dirty shirt last night, and he was SOBER, he showed appalling lack of judgement in allowing himself to take advantage, yes, take advantage of a friend who was hurting after her breakup of a man, also his friend. He has never before shown any romantic attraction towards Maureen and didn't even have the excuse of drink clouding his judgement because Maureen drank all the wine! I am disappointed in Curly, I really am!)

Meanwhile, the dead has risen. Oh my God I've never seen anyone look this bad the morning after, not even in real life! I wonder if the usually lovely Sherrie Hewson stayed up 48 hours straight to add to the realistic look of her character this morning who looks positively dreadful! Maureen grasps a glass of water and chokes down some headache pills and spends the rest of the scene looking as though she was trying to keep them down in the faint hope that they might do some good! She cringes at the sharp screech of her mother, inquiring as to where she was all night until 3. Maureen testily declares she was home and in bed by 2 to which Maud sarcastically agrees that yes, she might have been in bed all right. But for as much as Maud has always told Maureen there were other fish in the sea besides Reg, she comes over all moral when Maureen admits she was with another man. Maureen has no patience for her mother's rantings this morning and finally loses her temper altogether, howling that she had two intentions last night, to get drunk and to feel very sorry for herself and at that she dashes out, presumably to the loo where the aspirin has won the battle of the stomach. She certainly did accomplish both as she's looking splendidly sorry this morning!

Jack is pacing the living room in his vest, mithering Vera for a clean shirt. Vera has marked his cards, though, he's never too fussy what he wears but now there's a new barmaid to impress. She's not working her fingers to the bone etc. But her face falls when Jack decides he'll wear his fancy shirt to work in that case.

Alf and Audrey are arguing again about Lytham and her chronic indecision, changing her mind about what she wants with the weather. Now he wants to auction the house since the sale fell through and in the end she agrees to go. Yes, Alf. What does "Yes, Alf" mean though? LOL Just what it says, Alf, Audrey seems to have thrown in the towel and even offers to give up her job as she knows he'd rather she did. When he admits it, she magnanimously agrees to pack it in today. He's pleased and she hopes he is never the wiser about her getting the sack a few days before!

In the pub, Jack returns from the cellar and we get to see his fancy shirt when he takes off the green apron. It's light pink with rows of black tuxedo ruffles down the front!!! Tanya bursts into giggles and Bet is horrified and wastes no time making scathing remarks about his Tom Jones impressions (Englebert, Actually, Jack corrects her) and tells him never to wear a dress to work again. Jack is crestfallen but Tanya winds him up and soothes his ego by trailing a finger seductively over the ruffles and purring, "If there was any doubt about your masculinity, you couldn't wear that shirt. But you can!" The look on his face, a self satisfied preen, is priceless and I'm still giggling when I picture it!

Vera and Deirdre reminisce in the shop. Mike comes in and Vera suggests he buy it. You must be joking! Mike buys the last packets of the cigar inventory, Vera leans in for a gossip about the new barmaid. She fancies Jack, you know. Much amusement from her listeners and Mike declares that only an idiot would think she fancied your Jack. I know, Vera agrees, but the idiot happens to BE Our Jack, and she hoots at her own joke.

Andy is planning to break the bad news to his father and though Amy wants to be there, he doesn't think it's a good idea. Elsewhere in Bettabuys, Maureen turns around abruptly so she doesn't have to look Curly in the eye when he approaches her, tentatively asking after her mother. Maureen assumes he's embarrassed but he insists he isn't and they both jump apart, startled when Bet interrupts them with a cheery hello and a "What have you done with your puddings?" In a tone that suggests they've been very naughty. They look horrified so I might assume that this can be taken in another more highly suspect context? Or maybe it was just her tone. But no, Bet really is searching for puddings and awkwardly, Curly has Maureen attend to the request and he escapes.

We get the tail end of Andy and Amy's bickering just as Reg arrives, looking for Curly. Rather than look himself, he sends Andy to find his boss while he twitches and sways and checks his watch in his oddly robotic way that he has. From a few aisles away but obviously within view, Maureen is huddled behind some stock and having a baffled Bet watch out for Reg's movements until the coast is clear. Bet reports that Reg is heading towards Household goods so Maureen skips off leaving Bet alone and no wiser, wondering if the lot of them have gone round the twist judging from her face!

In the café, Audrey arrives with the "news" that they are now definitely going to Lytham once the house is auctioned off. Yes she's changed her mind after Alf begged and pleaded and she's even "given up her job" to make him a happy camper. Gail loses her eyebrows into her fringe, bemusedly calling her mother "barefaced". Audrey advises, good marriages aren't built on truth, they are built on believing what you're told! They all agree that Audrey is lucky Alf is so gullible.

Andy finds Curly to tell him that Reg is looking for him. It's obvious Curly isn't sure if Reg knows about last night or not when he slopes off in a different direction from where Andy suggested Reg was waiting. He's gone to the produce section to find Maureen to find out if she's said anything to Reg. No she hasn't and Good God no she won't nor will he, they promise. Maureen apologizes for dragging him into this and they now agree, with brilliant delivery of lines, rapidly back and forth, yes, yes, not say a word, no , "ships in the night", Yes, "ships in the night"! Curly hands over the earring, By the way, he says, you lost this overboard. Thank you she replies politely and they both head down separate but parallel aisles rapidly. But Reg encounters Maureen at the end of the one she's in, startling her. He tries to get her to listen to his explanations but she seems past anger now, and doesn't really care. She explains that she now knows he's not the only man that can make her happy as she once thought. We see one of those concave security mirrors behind them, reflecting a lurking Curly who's sweating uncomfortably.

In the café Nicky and Mark are talking about Mark's Latin lessons, which Mark seems to care less about, causing Alma who has overheard, to despair that he isn't even interested in the education all this money is paying for. Alf arrives looking for Audrey. Has he tried the dress shop, Gail asks mischievously. No, he thought he'd stay clear as Audrey is packing in her job and he doesn't know if there will be any ill feelings with the owner. Wise, Gail agrees. He talks about the shop with Alma and Gail, seemingly saying he's glad to be shut of it.

Reg arrives in the Kabin, in a shirty mood and ready to join the Foreign Legion. Mavis's comment about him being too old is silenced with one of them glares you give that screams volumes. He regretfully tells Rita that the sale of her house is off, unfortunately, and admits the wedding is off as well, his head bobbing low, as if the stuffing in the plush animal's neck has gone out of it. Rita takes the news gracefully and Reg is even overcome with emotion, dabbing a tear or two before leaving. But after he leaves, Rita is more concerned with having to flog the house all over again than burning with curiosity as Mavis is, wondering why the wedding is off. Rita thinks Maureen has seen the light, she's daft as two penn'orth of chips but even she doesn't deserve him! Yes, she's glad for Maureen but Mavis thinks Rita is being very cynical.

Mrs. Scott pays Deirdre her wages plus a week for no notice and tells her she's finished after today. Debi has Mr. Patel with her to help value what inventory is left. Deirdre, even though she knew she'd be finished soon, is outraged that she was given no notice at all and declines to assist, storming out the door ungratefully! ;)

She charges up the road, taking barely any notice of a familiar red headed woman who calls out a greeting to her after instructing the very large dog in a car to be a good boy until she gets back. It's Jenny Bradley, bless my soul! She goes across to the Kabin where her appearance flusters Mavis who flaps to the back to call up the stairs for Rita. Rita stops dead in her tracks when faced with Jenny's nervous smile and "Hiya".

Andy arranges with Steve to get some privacy when his dad comes *in the pub* (!) I guess he figures he'll let Jim oil up with a pint before breaking the news. Andy does tell Steve that he's leaving university, citing such lame excuses as going though the motions, not really wanting to be there, wanting to get on with the rest of his life. Steve thinks he's mad to forgo qualifications and rightly guesses it's all because of Amy. Reg enters and joins Curly. He's very sad, comparing himself to such great men as Julius Caesar and Robert Maxwell who were brought down by wanting just that little bit too much.

Tanya is still complimenting Jack on his shirt, skillfully disguising her sarcasm just enough that he doesn't realize he's being reeled in although she's pushing the envelope when she suggests he try out for an Elvis competition, if you ask me. But he buys it and is puffed up like a rooster, which is pretty much how the rest of the punters are seeing him and teasing him. Rita and Jenny come in, Rita looking very much like she's waiting for the other shoe to drop. Bet greets Jenny and asks what she's been up to. Evasively, Jenny answers Oh the same old stuff. Ah, So no improvement then, Bet fires. (ouch!) Jenny knows she's been hit and hits back weakly "Not much changed around here then, either!" leaving herself wide open for the fatal blow from Bet who's much better at this game, "Seems like it" with a knowing glance at Rita. Score Bet 1, Jenny 0. Class! Jenny does apologize to Rita for being a rotten cow before and repeats twice that she's not looking to move back in, as much as admitting there's trouble in paradise with Whatsisface the dentist. She asks to spend the night only, as she needs some time to think. But there's two of them. Oh no, Rita warns. No, Jenny explains, it's her dog! She doesn't go anywhere without her dog!

Across the bar, Jim has had his first pint and waxing on to Mike how there are some tings money can't buy, like intelligence. Oh you know what's coming! He points out his lad's going to university and not had to go to an expensive school to be accepted. (I hear a bomb ticking. . . ) Andy draws his father to the other side of the bar to break the news but when push comes to shove he can't do it and pretends he forgot what he wanted to say.

Reg has nearly accepted that it's over with Maureen but as his best friend, he is asking Curly to keep and eye on Maureen when he goes to Yorkshire next week, see if he can put forth Reg's case to her in the hopes that she may come back to him. Curly makes the appropriate sympathetic noises but is very stuck in the middle especially when Reg tells Curly he's the only man he can trust!

Diane Johnston

Debi Scott LESLEY CLARE-O'NEILL Mr. Patel BADI UZZAMAN Jenny Bradley SALLY ANN MATTHEWS
Written by JULIAN ROACH Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON


Originally transmitted: 20, 22, 24, 27 & 29 September 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 24 - Friday 28 July 2000
Episode Numbers: 3596 - 3600

Monday (3596, Monday 20 September 1993)

Jack and Vera are ready for the off, to their free holiday in Blackpool, courtesy of Our Tommy's maternal Grandparents, the Hortons. While Vera is concerned about having some sweeties for the prevention of train sickness, Jack is more worried about Vera's ten pair of shoes, reminding her that they're only going to be away for seven days, and compares her to Imelda Marcos. Vera is determined that they put on a good show of style for the Hortons, which prompts Jack to remind her to be nice to them-they're giving a free holiday. "Free holiday my eye! They want to get their paws on Our Tommy!" retorts Vera. The post has just arrived, and there's a letter from Our Terry. He's to be released from prison on the 20th December, which has Vera overjoyed. Tommy's Daddy will be home for Christmas! Jack, on the other hand, appears to be more upset than happy, as he lugs their bags through the doorway to the waiting taxi.

In Bettabuy's staff locker room, Amy and Andy are discussing Andy's failure to tell Liz and Jim about their wedding plans. Andy is afraid of Jim's reaction, but Amy is encouraging. She had to tell her parents about having a baby instead of going to University, and, wanting the baby, but not his father, and they were great about it in the end. Andy doesn't expect his Dad to be great, though, which concerns Amy. Are they committing murder? Is Andy ashamed of her? After all, she's eager to tell her Mother about their plans, since she thinks Andy is a great lad, and she trusts Amy's ability to make good decisions. Andy wonders why she hasn't already told her parents, and Amy once again shows her maturity. She won't stir up a fuss until things are settled, because she has her son Dominic to consider, and until Andy can deal with his parents, he's not ready to get married. Curly shows up to chivvy the workers to their tasks. "The locker room is not the place to discuss your personal life!" he cries. "Yeah, all right. Just because I've got a personal life," retorts Andy, as he follows Amy from the room. Curly tries to do the same and is met head-on by Maureen. A side step or two later, Maureen has him collared. They must talk, and both are concerned that their little secret will out - the mistake, as Curly describes it. Which is Maureens' point. No one wants to brag about his or her mistakes, and so he needn't worry. She won't talk, and no one will find out, as long as he doesn't either. As she tries to calm him, running her hands down his arms, they're interrupted by Miss Fenwick, who doesn't wish to butt in on a personal matter, but only wants Curly's professional expertise - if he's got the time, she smirks.

Jenny Bradley, led by her beautiful Japanese Akita showdog, enters the Kabin, to be met with effusions from animal-lover Mavis, who comments about the dog's carefully controlled diet, which Rita has mentioned. "Yes," says Rita, dryly. "This morning she had two bath towels and half a rug." Jenny asks Rita if she can stay a little longer than the one night, as Mitzi is due to have puppies, imminently. Mavis is transported, but Rita isn't a happy camper. Jenny tries the sympathy tactic, and credits Rita with warning her about Robert, if only she'd listened in the first place. She can't even go to town for fear of losing the dog in the traffic. Mavis is delighted to offer to look after the dog, once she's assured that the puppies won't arrive instanter, and Jenny, all smiles again, is off. Mavis will have to manage alone however, as Rita is off to the cash and carry, and not impressed by Jenny's manipulations.

Since the Queen's had its own set of pots and pans, Liz is packing up some of hers, for Andy's flat, which she assumes he'll be getting, in his second year at University. Then she gives him an opening, by joking that perhaps she should give him a new set, when he marries. When she asks how long she has to get the stuff organised before he returns to classes, he drops his bombshell - he's getting married. Liz is surprised, but is neither hostile, nor enthusiastic, saying only that Amy is a lovely girl. She becomes a little more animated as she assumes the marriage won't happen until Andy has graduated, but that quickly turns to anger, when he tells her that he's not going back to school, but staying at Bettabuy's. Even the fact that he'll be a trainee manager doesn't mollify her. When Colin pops in to remind her that it's opening time, Andy promptly tries to excuse himself, but Liz tells Colin to open the bar, and Andy to stay, lunch hour or not. He's not escaping a discussion that easily.

Deirdre's checking the help wanted ads in the paper, when Tracy comes home from shopping with a new top to wear. Deirdre is furious - even though Tracy has contributed to the housekeeping, Deirdre has no income, and Tracy doesn't seem to grasp the seriousness of their financial straits. Deirdre has to apologise, though, when it transpires that the top is a gift for Deirdre, to cheer her up, and to further Tracy's plan. She's heard Bet talking to Rita in the Kabin about her staffing problems, and thinks Deirdre should ask Bet for a job at the Rovers'. Deirdre is sceptical, knowing full well that Bet needs someone to keep the blokes happy - eye candy, not just bar skills, and she's too old to be worth looking at. Tracy tells her, "We'll make you worth looking at!"

Back at the Queen's the argument continues between Liz and Andy. Liz is annoyed that Andy hasn't told Jim, and no doubt expects her to do so, but she returns to the education and work aspect. She had dreams for Andy, but he wants to live his life, not hers. Andy repeats the argument he used with Amy, as she'd told him to do - that a degree doesn't guarantee a job - but Liz's point is that it's education, and education stays with you. "So does the overdraft that you're running up while you're getting it!" Andy retorts, which prompts Liz to assume that he needs more money from his parents, but it's not money, it's love, Andy tells her. Now it's Amy's turn to be blamed, as Liz states that if Amy loved him she wouldn't ask him to leave college, but would wait the two years for him. His defence, quite justified, as we know, that Amy didn't want him to leave, and was willing to wait, cuts no ice with Liz. She seizes on the messy family situation as Andy's reason - he's punishing them - but he continues to argue for the common sense of his reasons. He's going to have a job, training, salary, pension, and prospects, and three quarters of his classmates would jump at the chance he's got for a secure future. Liz says that she won't let him, but he's not asking for permission, and she then refuses to be the one to tell Jim - he must tell his Dad himself. As Andy agrees in resignation that he can't change her attitude, Colin returns to the door, requiring Liz at the bar. Liz tells Andy to take the kitchen wares with him, and he tries to lighten the mood be referring to the new set she was going to buy when he married. "I don't think so," she replies, in a manner not just angry, but almost contemptuous. "Fine, I'll go now, then," Andy tells her, "and I'll let you talk it over with your boyfriend," he stabs back at her, as he passes Colin at the door.

In Bettabuy's, Curly is still a-flutter with nerves, and seeks reassurance from Maureen on the shop floor, as she stacks shelves, that Elaine Fenwick saw nothing between them, earlier. In doing so, of course, he draws even more attention, leading Ivy Brennan to quip to Miss Fenwick, at how Mrs. Naylor is still the blue-eyed girl, even under new management. "She must be a very good worker," she snidely says, in a voice dripping with innuendo. Curly tries to cover himself by giving Maureen some work advice, but Miss Fenwick also jumps at the chance to stick the boot in! Curly gives himself away with his Freudian slips, as he argues with her, but she's determined to tell him that Maureen's preferential treatment is causing staff resentment, "And whatever you do for her, you should do for all of them!" she tells him. LOL!

The Duckworths have arrived at the B & B in Blackpool, and Jeff Horton is anxious to assure Jack that they're guests, and he doesn't want them to be out of pocket, as he brandishes some currency, but he doesn't want to offend by offering. Jack mutters about Vera's attitude, and Jeff, quick on the uptake, tells Jack that it's a contribution to Our Tommy's upkeep. Fair enough, for Jack, but it would be better if Vera wasn't in the know. "Message received and understood," agrees Jeff, finally relinquishing the bundle of notes to Jack's eager and hovering hand. In the lounge, Vera, Doreen and Shirley Henderson, the landlady, are getting acquainted. Doreen is dying to get her hands on Our Tommy, but Vera has him gripped securely around his waist, on her lap. Her wisdom in the shoe department is verified, as she's able to brag about having plenty of suitable shoes, so as to be comfortable during their holiday! The landlady blows her own trumpet. Instead of being banished from the B & B from 9am to 6pm, they must be out from only 10am to 4pm, as long as they've booked high tea, and the doors - both the front door and the lounge - are locked at 11pm. The old caricature, a battleaxe landlady, isn't the case in her establishment, she assures them. Doreen is eager to baby-sit, and the Horton's have even bought a cot for Tommy, just in case he can stay overnight while Jack and Vera enjoy themselves. Vera, full of suspicion, considers "That says everything," meaningfully. "It says that you're very good Grandparents," Jack asserts, and quite deftly concludes the meeting by citing the need to bathe and settle the baby. The landlady reminds them that towels are provided, but must remain in the bathroom, or they end up, (horrors!), on the beach! Oh, the nostalgiathe seaside: sand, seaweed, buckets and spades, deckchairs, candy floss, donkey rides, and gritty tomato sandwiches, washed down with Tizerwhat bliss! Of course, my memories are of North Sea beaches, but a resort is a resort, after all. :-D

At the Rovers', Andy is briefing Amy on developments, and cannot see why he needs to consult his parents at all, considering the mess they've made of their own lives. "Parents should be done away with!" is his opinion. Amy, ever sensible, reminds him that she's a parent, and so will he be, if they marry. And no matter how he feels at the moment, at some point he'll need them and be sorry if they're estranged, for which she doesn't want to be either the cause, or catch the blame. He must tell his Dad and sort it all out before everyone begins to take sides. That's her ultimatum.

After having been gone all day, Jenny breezes into the Kabin with a shopping bag, excusing her lateness on not being able to afford petrol for the car. As Mavis describes how she's cared for Mitzi, Jenny notices something on the dog's teeth. It's the remnants of lemon bon bons, which have settled the dog every time she got a little tetchy as the day passed. Jenny is furious, and turns on Mavis in a temper, for upsetting the dog's diet with unhealthy food. Just as she's about to call Mavis "a stupid" Rita asserts, "Hey! That's enough!" cutting Jenny short, Mavis apologises in distress, and Jenny says she didn't mean to be rude, but Mavis is quite upset, and is happy to go home, at Rita's suggestion and encouragement. "I don't know why you keep her on!" Jenny states, "You can't just shove toffees down an animal like this," but Rita repeats that that's enough, and tells her to finish Mavis's task of placing magazines on the shelves, unless she's too high and mighty to do that anymore. Jenny is taken aback, but Rita points out her condescending behaviour. Once more the mood switch occurs. The dog is all Jenny has now, after giving up everything on the Street for Robert. No one likes her, everyone hates her, who cares about her, if he doesn't, and the tears begin. Rita unbends, and drawing Jenny close, tells her that she does, although she's probably a fool to admit it.

Tracy is putting the finishing touches to Deirdre's eyes, at the end of her "make Mum beautiful" session, and Deirdre comments that the last time she wore blue eyeshadow was in 1976 when she was expecting Tracy. (She's looking very trim and youthful in her new red top, which is essentially a low-cut tank top, with sleeves) Tracy tells her that the 70's are 'trendy' now, and since she was actually there, in the 70's, she'll be able to wow the younger punters, but the perm will have to go. "It's very 1983 - sort of early Cher!" As there's nothing she can do about the perm just now, Deirdre asks Tracy to accompany her to the Rovers', but only for lemonade with ice - no bottled lager, as Tracy jokingly suggests.

Liz has turned up at the McDonald residence - not to socialise, since Colin is covering for her at the Queen's (Nice way to put Jim's back up, Liz!) - but to tell Jim about Andy's plans for his future. Jim is stunned, but also upset that Andy didn't tell him himself. Liz wants Jim to talk to Andy, to stop him, to do something, but Jim asks what can he do, if Andy if Andy isn't even talking to him. He also takes her to task for her use of the word 'we'. There is no 'we' anymore. They're still Andy's parents though, Liz responds, but Jim feels that they're poor examples: she's her own woman, living with her toyboy, and he's alone, and his son hasn't even told him of his plans. Liz tries to bring the subject back to Andy, as she thinks that Jim is only focussing on his and her situation. Jim thinks she's being obtuse - they're a joke, as parents. Liz hopes to discuss Andy as adults, because they are still a family, which Jim denies, since Liz broke it up. "There's no such thing as the McDonalds." If she doesn't like that, then only she can put them back together again. If she doesn't, then, "Andy can go and do whatever the hell he wants!" Jim concludes. (Not because he doesn't care, or want to change Andy's mind, but because he can't make Andy respect them, or listen to them, anymore) Liz says no more, and leaves.

At the Rovers' bar, Bet tells Deirdre that she looks younger, and Tracy looks older, to which Deirdre replies that they've been swapping fashion hints. Tracy refers to Bet's difficulty in getting good bar staff, with Raquel gone and Jack away, which leads Bet to detail the chamber of horrors who've turned up looking for work. She needs someone to draw the punters, as well as pints, and, unfortunately, tells Deirdre that these punters don't want to look at the likes of them, but at the likes of Tracy, who might get a job in another year, when she's old enough. Deirdre's face falls, and when Tracy upbraids her for not asking for a chance, she points out that Bet didn't want her, she wanted Tracy, and leaves, upset, and brushing rudely past a startled Emily, who's even more bewildered when Tracy does the same thing.

When Andy returns home, Jim calls him for a wee word, and gives him the opportunity to speak up, but Andy doesn't bite, and Jim has to tell him that he knows about his plans. He asks Andy why Liz had to be the one to tell him, but before Andy can respond, Jim tells him that he doesn't blame the boy. "Think about this," he speaks quietly. "Every single thing you think you feel for that wee girl, I felt for your Mother. I'd have died for her. I'd have killed for her. When youse two came along, the same thing. But just you take a look at me now. None of youse'll even speak to me. Here's where it ends up Andy. And this is the way it's gonna end for you, son." During this sad and gently spoken speech, Andy winces, and obviously feels his Dad's pain. Jim pats him on the shoulder, leaving Andy looking not only thoughtful, but also full of what looks like pity.

Ruth Hempsey

Jenny Bradley - SALLY ANN MATTHEWS Doreen Horton - ANNIE RAITT Jeff Horton - DICKEN ASHWORTH Shirley Henderson, the landlady - SHIRLEY STELFOX
Written by - FRANK COTTRELL BOYCE Directed by - CHARLES LAUDER

Tuesday (3597, Wednesday 22 September 1993)

At Jim's house, Jim enters the living room with his breakfast in hand. As he settles down with it we see Andy descend the stairs. Jim watches from the dining table as Andy picks up his things from the hallway and departs without a word. Jim sighs. "You have a nice day too," he mutters.

At the Queens, Liz is having her breakfast. Colin enters and tells her he had the most amazing dream. "Oh yeah?" "Yes, you and me in a beach bar in the Caribbean." Liz is non-committal. Colin tells her it could happen. "Not while I've got kids in England to worry about," replies Liz. Well it was just a dream. Colin sits down but not at the table and rattles the paper. He looks at Liz but she turns away. It's one of those mornings.

In Blackpool it's a different story. Breakfast at the boarding house is in full swing. One of the guests is secreting comestibles in her table napkin for future use. (Creamer? Butter? Jam?) Doreen's sister Shirley Henderson is giving Jack her special attention and serving his Full English herself. She notices he is looking at the racing pages and asks him if there is anything he fancies. Jack hastily turns the paper over and pretends he wouldn't know where to start. Shirley has him figured. "Pigs might fly," she smiles. Jack, sensing an ally, asks her where, if he wanted, a 'bloke' might have a little flutter. Shirley offers to place his bets for him. "If a 'bloke' wants to keep such things quiet." She is just pocketing the money (without doubt some of money Jeff gave Jack for Tommy) as Vera arrives at the table. She has left Tommy sleeping and slipped down to get her breakfast before he wakes up. (They rise very early in these Blackpool boarding houses. If you're not down by 7:15 all that's left is the stewed prunes) A car hoots outside and Vera is surprised to see Doreen arriving in the driveway. "What's she doing here?" "She's come to see Tommy. That's what we brought him for, remember?" Vera looks resigned. She was hoping for a Doreen-free breakfast at least.

In the Kabin, Tracy Barlow is checking on a magazine delivery. Jenny and her bitch Mitzi enter.(Or should that be the other way round?) Tracy recognizes Jenny and steps forward. Jenny tells Tracy she didn't recognize her because she was so grown-up from the last time she saw her. Tracy admires Mitzi and Jenny airily tells she can have one of Mitzi's pups for a few hundred pounds or so. Tracy declines this offer. Rita, seeing Mitzi being a bit too familiar with the stock, asks Jenny to restrain the animal. Jenny makes to take Mitzi upstairs. (Where, as Rita remarks there are good carpets and much more interesting things to destroy) Jenny tells Tracy they must have a natter sometime and Tracy mentions she hasn't had her breakfast yet. Mavis, anxious to make amends for feeding Mitzi bon-bons the other day offers give Mitzi her breakfast so Jenny can go and have breakfast with Tracy. Rita just wants the dog out of the shop. Tracy tells Jenny she usually goes to Jim's Cafe. "Is that place still going? Nothing much changes round here does it?" says Jenny. "It makes it easier if people need to find us again," says Rita smiling through her sarcasm. She is attentive of Jenny's answer when Tracy asks her if she's back for good. "No. I'm not sure what I'm doing yet." H'm. Jenny has dumped her prize pet when it suited her. Mavis is wittering over said prized pet. Rita wishes it was dinnertime!

At Jim's Cafe, Alf is telling Gail that now they are finally moving to Lytham Audrey has gone all 'sun beds and rabbit food'. "Has she seen our local health and beauty expert in action?" Gail motions towards Denise who is tucking into a fried egg butty or some such fare. "You need your fats," says the unrepentant Denise. Alf asks Gail to guess who has turned up on Rita's doorstep but Gail already knows. Jenny Bradley. Gail explains to Denise that Jenny is a lady who is very partial to other people's husbands. (Gail's husband included of course) "I wish I'd known," says Denise, "I'd a couple she could have had." At that moment Jenny and Tracy enter the cafe and Jenny approaches the counter and smiles at her former adversary. Gail "smiles" back. Jenny tells her that she's just been hearing how Gail now owns the cafe. "You and Martin still together?" "Oh yes. He's hung in there." Before a cat fight breaks out, Alf hastily interjects, "And they have another kiddie now, you know." "Terrific, that's really terrific Gail." As Jenny chokes these words out Gail looks at her like the cat who got the cream. This exchange is watched by Denise who comes over when Jenny and Tracy go and sit down. "That's the man-eater? Looks harmless enough to me!" "So did her father," says Alf soberly.

Tanya is polishing tables in the Rovers. Bet is watching her from behind the bar. She wants Betty's opinion. "Should I or shouldn't I keep her on?" Betty is cautious. "The punters like her." "Yes, but do we?" Betty isn't sure. Neither is Bet. Bet comments that Tanya knows they need her while Jack is away. Betty suggests Bet plays it by ear for a few more days and Bet agrees.

Blackpool Sands and the Big Wheel. Doreen is walking away from the Wall's Ices van with her hands full. We pan to Jack and Vera in deck chairs and Tommy in his push chair. Vera is telling Jack that he shouldn't have asked for two scoops of rum'n'raisin. "Doreen will think you can't have an ice cream without a tipple in it! Try and make a good impression!" Doreen arrives with the ices and a giant candy dummy (pacifier) for Tommy. "Oh Jack! Just what you needed!" says Vera. Doreen asks Tommy if he'd like to see the donkeys with Grandma. She has to make it clear to Vera that she meant herself and Tommy - on their own. Vera tries to make excuses that she doesn't know when Tommy will get tired and such but Jack helps Doreen shoot these down. "I'll be guided by you, Vera," Doreen tells her. "I'll bring him straight back if he gets tetchy." As she happily pushes Tommy away Jack remarks that Doreen really loves Tommy. Vera tells him that Doreen is going to have work out what she wants to be called when Tommy starts talking. "We can't both be Grandmas." "Yes you can Vera!" says Jack.

In the Queen's Curly is explaining his lunchtime presence. "The trouble with the staff canteen is it's full of staff!" Colin says he thought staff relations were the order of the day at Curly's workplace. "Bettabuys? Betterbirds, from what I hear!" Curly wants to know what he means by this. "Well, Andy and Amy and Randy Reg of course." Colin is playing bantering barman but Curly doesn't know this. He is very disconcerted when Colin tells him her can recommend the more mature women and suggests that the best man and the bride. . it has been known nudge nudge wink wink. This is too close to the truth for Curly. He tells Colin he came in to the pub to get away from work. Colin is still joking about all the women Curly has under his control when Liz appears. Colin asks her what to suggest for a man who is seriously disillusioned with his job. "I suggest he could stop pushing the same fate on younger blokes who could do a hell of a lot better," replies Liz in a tone which is not bantering landlady mode. Curly wants to know what she means. "Andy," says Colin. Curly points out that Andy approached him. "Well you didn't discourage him," Liz responds. Curly tells her that if it's what Andy wants it isn't a bad career choice. Liz replies that since the only two examples she has are Reg and Curly she isn't excited by the prospect. Colin tries to smooth things but Curly tell them to forget the food and he will drink his beer as fast as he can and leave. "Whatever you like," replies Liz hands on hips. Colin remonstrates but she cuts him off, telling him he doesn't know anything about it, he's not a parent. "Well let's just say I'm not inspired by the ones I do know! Excuse me," Colin leaves Liz to serve someone and she is left standing behind the bar her hands on her hips.

In the Rovers Jim and Steve are having a talk about Andy. At least Jim is trying to have a talk. "What does it matter what I think?" asks Steve. "He's your brother." "So?" Jim is exasperated. "Doesn't it matter to you what he gets up to?" Steve obviously thinks this is a pointless question. "Why should it?" Steve tells Jim even he he said that it was the best decision Andy had ever made it would matter because Andy's mad. "I've always thought he was mad." In another part of the room Ken appears to have nodded off over the beer pumps but he perks up when Tanya puts a pint in front of him and says "You're quiet!" Ken introduces himself and Tanya lets it be known she has done her homework as far as the regulars are concerned. She alludes to his tutorial relationship with Raquel and tells him she's a quick leaner. This display of the barmaid's art of flattery chat is as much for Bet's benefit as Ken's. Tanya knows she is under scrutiny. Bet retires to the back of the bar with Betty to watch the proceedings. "She plays that bar like a finely tuned instrument, I'll give her that Betty." "But. ." says Betty. Bet shakes her head. "I don't know. We'll see." Rita attacks a G&T and tells Alf she been looking forward to that all morning. "I feel as if I'm living out a shaggy dog story!" "Well make sure there's an end to it," says Alf. He is concerned as to why Jenny has turned up at this particular time. Especially as Rita is now a much wealthier woman than she was when Jenny left. Rita tells him she is enjoying a bit of familiar company. Alf warns her not to get taken advantage of. "I'm no novice where a Bradley's concerned," says Rita. Alf tells her to be careful and not to set herself up for a fall.

Back on the beach, Vera and Jack are huddled on their deck chairs in front of a wind screen watching Doreen play on the beach with Tommy. The wind whipping Doreen's clothing, the grey skies, the long sleeved clothing. . . ah bracing British holiday weather that's how I remember it! The earlier scene with the sun was a total anomaly. . . No words are spoken in this little scene. Jack tries to sneak a peek at the racing page but is startled into dropping it when Vera takes his other hand and squeezes it affectionately. Jack doesn't resist. He sits back in his deck chair and smiles content in the knowledge that Vera can't go much further - not in broad daylight with RTommy watching!

Closing up time at the Rovers. It's hard work without Jack. Bet says she's getting the iron out and suggests they can all run it over their faces before the evening. Betty is particularly whacked and Bet tells her they'll see her tomorrow. Tanya starts "What about tonight? . ." but Bet gives her a look and tells Betty that she and Tanya will manage tonight and she is to go home and put her feet up. "Oh poor thing!" says Tanya watching her go. "It might be more than one staff member you're after before time." Bet rounds on her immediately and tells her that she wants to be 100% sure of her last catch before she goes casting the net again. "Hearing you loud and clear," responds Tanya. "Good, then we shouldn't have any problems!" Bet sweeps out in a manner worthy of her esteemed predecessor Annie Walker. "Put plenty of starch in that ironing!" mutters Tanya after her.

In the Kabin, Tracy is discussing Deirdre's joblessness with Ken. He tells her she should be contributing to the housekeeping. Tracy is not impressed. "She's got to get out there and find a job!" Ken reminds her that not every one is lucky enough to fall on their feet the way she did. "Not if they don't make the effort!" retorts Tracy as she leaves. Ken raises his eyes. "The daughter I created," he says as he pays Rita. Jenny enters and Ken welcomes her back but Jenny has something else on her mind. She appears very distressed as she passes through the shop to go upstairs. Mavis tells Rita to go on up. "Maybe she just wants someone to talk to," says Rita. "Someone to play Mother," suggests Mavis. Rita hands Mavis the newspaper order book. "Well, while I play mother you play newsagent," she says as she follows Jenny upstairs. As Rita enters the flat, Jenny is on phone in a heated and tearful argument. "Fine, fine. Keep the lot. I don't care anymore either!" Jenny slams the phone down on her estranged husband. She tells Rita that she went to get some money from a joint bank account and discovered that Robert had cleaned it out. She tells Rita that she wanted to give her some money for having her and Mitzi but Rita tells her not to worry. Jenny recovers from her anger over Robert and tells Rita she was glad that she found someone else after Alan but was sorry it didn't last longer for her. "Tell me about him." Rita is happy to. The subtext of this scene is to soften Rita up by letting her talk about Ted. Rita offers to help Jenny with some money which is refused at first but quickly assented to when Rita asks her how she's going to live. "Well if you're sure." Rita is and tells her that now she is flush Jenny can buy her a drink in the Rovers. Jenny ends this scene considerably perkier than she started it. But some doubts cloud Rita's face as Jenny happily goes off to get ready.

In the Rovers Tanya and Denise are discussing the relative gossip quotient of their jobs. "You barmaids have got nothing on hairdressers," Denise tells her. Tanya points out that as soon as the hairdresser is finished she's down the pub telling it to the barmaid. Jim comes in and offers to buy Curly a drink in exchange for some crack. (chat not illegal drugs) Curly is still smarting from his reception in the Queens at lunchtime. He responds, "Oh yeah and how will that be taken in the morning?" Now Jim is mystified but Curly responds that a bit of harmless chitchat is tantamount to conspiracy in the McDonald family. Jim tells him to forget it. Further down the bar Jenny is sounding off to Denise. . . "and then I shared one of Rita's many houses with a friend of mine." "Angie," Rita reminds her. "She's not still around is she?" Curly is passing and tells her that Angie went to Mexico. "Wow! Who did she con into paying for that?" Rita tells her, "Nobody, Angie is doing it on her own." Jenny says she'd be terrified of doing anything like that if she didn't have someone to fall back on. Denise whispers, "We think Curly was rather hoping it would be him." Jenny remarks that he's not a bad catch these days with a manger's salary he must be raking it in. "Angie never did know a good thing when she was on to it. Whose round is it?" A few scales drop from Rita's eyes onto the bar. Seems Alf could be right.

Jack is dozing on a couch at the boarding house but Doreen and Vera are alert and listening to the baby monitor. Vera tells Doreen that Tommy talks to himself before he goes to sleep and Doreen remembers that Lisa used to do that. She starts to cry but collects herself and tells Vera that she gets upset every so often. Seeing Tommy reminds her of Lisa so much. Tommy suddenly cries out, waking Jack. Both women interpret this as a serious cry and Doreen is first up to go and check. Shirley comes in and slips Jack his winnings. "Must be beginner's luck," says Jack. Vera is listening intently to the baby monitor. She hears Doreen talking to to Tommy. The she hears her say "Let's switch this off," and the monitor goes dead. Shirley returns and tells her she has the post cards Vera asked for and Vera goes with Shirley to get them. Jeff comes in with a couple of pints of beer and the men indulge in a guy talk. Jeff suggests Jack should go for a walk down Memory Lane and go to some clubs. Jack replies clubs are nothing to what went on at the holiday flats in his day and reminisces about an Australian ballet dancer. There are lots of innuendoes, and double entendres in this conversation as well as actual nudging and winking by Jack. Vera wants to know what they are talking about and Jeff tells her they were discussing tourists and how they never leave Blackpool disappointed. (more nudging and winking) "Oh aye, there's always something to write home about," says Vera giving Jack a bunch of postcards and telling him to get cracking.

At the McDonald's it's time for THE TALK. Jim tells Andy he's been doing a bit of thinking. "Good for you," is Andy's response. Jim presses on. He tells Andy he's been remembering about Andy and Paula and how things were with them. He thinks it's like that with Andy and Amy. Andy does not. "It's completely different." Andy tells Jim "I know how I feel and I don't want to hear anyone else's interpretation." Jim tells him it's a conversation he's after. "Well that takes two." Andy gets up to leave the room. Jim tells him to sit down but Andy does not. He suggests that Jim wants him to shop around a bit more. Jim says he should take a bit more time. "Do a bit of bedhopping? What am I supposed to get out of that?" Jim begins to realize he shouldn't have started down this road. Andy reminds him that he was hardly a man of the world before he married. He was younger than Andy and Steve are now. Jim tells him that curiosity never goes away one just isn't in a position to do anything about it. "So I should throw away what I've got for the sakes of a few flings?" I'm committed now." Jim tells Andy he's too much like himself when it comes to women. "Well now's your chance, get yourself out there." "It's more complicated than that. . ." Andy agrees it is. "And that's how I know exactly who I want to be with, same as you do." Jim looks up from the hole he has just dug himself into.

Closing time at the Queens. Liz slams the doors. The punters are gone. Now they can have a proper row. "Well I'm sorry your plans have been upset by my son throwing his life away on a girl he hardly knows!" Liz shouts. "How do you know that?" Colin shouts back over the dirty glasses. (All together now) "Because I'M HIS MOTHER!!" Liz crashes about the till as she cashes up. She tells Colin that she is a mother by choice and she can't change that. That's who he's taken on. Colin wants to know if she and Jim are getting back together. Liz tells him not. Colin persists. He wants to know where he stands with Liz. Is she with him because she wants be or because she feels she has to be. "Because you have a choice. Just tell us how it is." Liz tells him he knows how it is. Colin says he doesn't. He needs it spelling out. "Because, after all, I wouldn't want anyone to accuse you of chucking your life away on me!" Colin storms out of the bar. Liz slams the till.

Libby Seekings

Doreen Horton ANNIE RAIT Jeff Horton DICKEN ASHWORTH Shirley Henderson SHIRLEY STELFOX Tommy Duckworth DARRYL EDWARDS Jenny Bradley SALLY ANN MATTHEWS
Written By PATREA SMALLACOMBE Directed By CHARLES LAUDER

Wednesday (3598, Friday 24 September 1993)

A phone is ringing -- whose phone is it? Steve answers. It's Liz, wanting to speak to Jim. A conversation ensues about Andy. Liz wants to know if Jim has been working on him, and gets upset when she hears that they haven't talked much. She wants Jim to try to persuade Andy to remain in university, but Jim is reluctant, and resents Liz's use of the word "we" whenever she discusses what needs to be done. Her last words are "I'm relying on you, Jim," and she hangs up the phone. As Jim is following suit, Andy breezes by and leaves the house for work with nary a word.

Ken drops in on Deirdre to find out how she's surviving without a job. He inquires about her finances and offers to help her if she gets desperate. Deirdre firmly turns him down. Ken offers to resume payments for Tracy, but Deirdre is adamant in refusing any aid from him. She reminds him that Tracy is now earning and so Ken owes them nothing. This rankles Ken, who says he didn't see it as some kind of debt. Deirdre apologizes. "I'm sorry, Ken, I shouldn't have said that." But it doesn't change her mind about taking money from him, and she tells him she and Tracy will manage. "Don't lie to me," Ken says. "Only married couples feel the need to lie to each other. You can be too proud for your own good, sometimes." Deirdre has heard enough. "That's what you came round to tell me, is it, that I'm a proud liar?" She guesses that Tracy has spoken to him about their situation and tells him to go home, but Ken stays and defends Tracy. Deirdre admits that she's "in a mess", but maintains that she needs no help from him. Ken sighs and leaves, mumbling that he'll see himself out.

At Bettabuys, Curly is attempting to calm a distraught Maureen. "It's the day I was to become Mrs. Reginald Holdsworth," she cries, as a curious shopper looks on. Curly tells the shopper she's "just come off onions." (They must have been pretty strong!) He tells Maureen that she has to pull herself together and that they'll have a cry together at break time. She attempts a weak smile and assures him that she's alright. Curly leaves, but as he is walking down the next aisle, renewed wailing pierces the air. He turns on his heel and rushes back to find a startled Andy protesting his innocence. "I didn't say anything!". "Oh no, it's rice," Curly exclaims, referring to the contents of the basket Andy is pushing. He helps Maureen away from such a blatant wedding reminder, leaving a crowd of curious onlookers behind.

In Blackpool, Jack, Jeff, and Doreen are waiting for Vera. Shirley, the hostess, breezes in and begins to adjust Jack's collar, saying it's buttoned too tight. Doreen points out that Jack is taking his mac with him on their outing, and Shirley concludes that he must be taking it because the grass is wet as "he's such a gentleman." She leaves the room, but not without giving RJack an appreciative glance. Vera is finally ready. It looks like Jack and Vera are going out while Jeff and Doreen babysit little Tommy. Jack and Vera head out for an afternoon in Blackpool.

In the Kabin, Emily is commenting to Rita that Tracy is more like her father than Deirdre, and a small moan on the state of today's youth follows. Mavis is about to pop out for her dinner. "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse!" she declares. "You couldn't make that a dog, could you?" Rita asks hopefully. "People who don't like animals usually don't like people," Mavis admonishes her. Emily leaves, and Mavis tells Rita that she thinks Jenny has grown up a lot and changed. "She still suits herself. That hasn't changed," is Rita's reply. Mavis says, "she'll be on the move soon, and then you can relax." She bumps into Jenny on her way out, who proves Rita right by thrusting Mitzi's leash into Mavis' hand. "Just watch her for half an hour," she says, and disappears.

In the Rovers, Jim is once again talking to Steve about Andy (seems to me he keeps talking to the wrong twin). He suggests that he and Steve talk to Andy together, and says he "needs to pull this one off". "Oh, I see, brownie points from me mum," Steve guesses. "Something like that, yes," Jim admits. Alf discusses the auction of the house, which is taking place that afternoon, with Bet. "I want to get rid of Grasmere Drive. The sooner I get rid, the sooner I get Audrey to Lytham." Bet worries that someone might buy the house for peanuts, but Alf tells her he put a reserve price on it. Jenny is propping up the bar talking to Tanya. Tanya is of the opinion that the pub isn't run as professionally as it could be. "Betty's past it, and Jack's as good as useless." She tells Jenny that Jack is due back that evening but they'll still be short staffed. Jenny looks thoughtful. Audrey joins Alf but tells him that she has to go pick up Sarah Lou, who is poorly, and will take her back to the house, so she won't be attending the auction. Alf senses a trick and vows to Bet that the house will be sold that day.

Jack and Vera are enjoying their afternoon on the town, but Vera is worried about money. Jack shows his concern by tossing a large blue stuffed teddy that they must have won into a horse drawn buggy. "Get in," he orders Vera, and they climb aboard with Vera shrieking "do you know how much they cost?" and Jack responding "it's only money". They ride off laughing, having a wonderful time.

Back at the Kabin, Mavis has just returned from a walk around the block with Jenny's pup (while Jenny is enjoying herself across the road). Rita is upset because more than half an hour has come and gone with no sign of Jenny. Rita wants to have it out with her when she gets back, but Mavis doesn't want to be used as an excuse for an argument. Mavis take the charitable view, saying that Jenny must be having problems or she wouldn't have come back, and it must be difficult for her, with people pointing her out as Alan Bradley's daughter wherever she goes. A contrite Rita says, "I'm a big nag, aren't I?" Mavis says she just has a way of "making her feelings felt. Jenny won't stay around here any longer than she needs to." "You're saying I've not made her feel very welcome," says Rita. Mavis' face shows agreement. "Well, I'll have to try a bit harder. Put my head in a bag and keep me gob shot," Rita resolves. At this moment, Jenny bursts in and announces that she has a job, starting at the Rovers that night. Oops, Mavis looks like she wants to take back a few things, and Rita might have "I told you so" on the tip of her tongue.

Jack and Vera are back at the B&B. Jack is snoring away on the sofa, drunk. Jeff offers to run them all the way to Weatherfield, but Vera insists that the train will be fine. "How are you going to manage Jack?" Jeff asks. "Don't worry about him. A short, sharp kick to where his brains are will sort him out," Vera says. Vera thanks Jeff and Doreen for the lovely time, and then Vera and Doreen take Tommy to the car, Doreen clearly sad her time with Tommy is at an end. Jeff and Shirley tend to Jack. Shirley says that Jack reminds her of Charles Bronson (a trip to the eye doctor is in order!). Jeff tells her to "give over!" They each take an arm and lift Jack from the sofa, then help him to the car.

Audrey arrives at the café saying that Sarah is in the car and "just wants her mum". Gail leaves. Audrey offers to step in for her, but Alma says she'll call Phyllis. Audrey wants to know what Phyllis has that she hasn't got. "She knows her way around," says Alma. "But she's ancient," Audrey says. Alma tells her to get herself down to the house auction while she still has time. "And see my house flogged from under me. No thanks!" She leaves with the parting shot, "you better call Phyllis before she goes out jogging".

At the auction, Alf seems uneasy as a freehold house is auctioned off. He begins to leave to get some air, but what should be next on the block -- the corner shop! Alf turns around and sits himself back down as the bid climb from £30,000 to £34,000.

Home sweet home for Jack and Vera. Jack looks like he needs some time off to recover from his trip, and after sticking the kettle on, collapses into a chair and immediately dozes off. This annoys Vera, who loudly reminds him that he has to work that evening. She pulls on the lapels of his suit in an attempt to get him up, and feels something in his jacket pocket. "What's this?" she asks, pulling out some folded bills. "Where did you get it from? You had none when we left." Jack suddenly becomes industrious and wants to go to work, but Vera isn't going to let him escape so easily and won't let him get out of the chair. She guesses that Jeff Horton "greased you". Vera is sick over it, telling him that he took a bribe and it means the Hortons will expect to see much more of Tommy. "You've shamed me, Jack Duckworth. Shamed me!" she says. Jack is left with a single note (don't know what denomination) in another pocket, which he pulls out and examines, upset that it's all he has left.

At the auction, the bid for the shop is up to £55,000. "Any more bids?", asks the auctioneer. Alf looks anxiously around the room, but there are no other bids. "Sold! To the gentleman at the back." "You've just bought yourself a shop," the man seated next to Alf says. Oh dear, Alf owns the shop again. Will this be the end of Deirdre's woes? Alf's house is announced as the next item for auction, but he jumps up and yells, "No, no, I'm not selling. I've, er, um, changed my mind."

Jim arrives home in time to see Andy and Steve leaving. He phones Liz.

Tracy is heading out to stay at a friend's house. Deirdre wants to discuss Ken's earlier visit. She wants to know what Tracy has been saying. Tracy doesn't understand why Ken can't help out. Deirdre says she doesn't want it from him, angering Tracy. "But you'll take it from me. Here!" she says, tipping her purse upside down over the table so that all her money falls out. "Right, that's the lot of it. Satisfied now?" she asks, then storms out.

Tanya teaches Jenny how to pull a pint while a displeased Rita looks on. "I can't sack her," says Bet. "I thought you'd be glad she were earning." "She said she only wanted to stop temporary," says Rita. "Doesn't look like it now, does it? And who's going to walk that Mitzi while she's in here?" Bet surprises her by telling her that Mavis has volunteered. Andy and Steve are discussing Andy's decision regarding marriage and university when Jim walks in and says that Liz is coming to tea the next day and wants both Andy and Amy to be there. "It could have been worse," Steve comments after Jim has left. "They could have asked to see all three of you." Audrey and Alma are sitting in a booth having a drink. Audrey reckons Sarah Lou has the chicken pox. "Looks like you'll be stuck with Phyllis for the duration." She decides to nip over to Gail's to see how things are going, and plans to go home afterward. "Do you still have a home to go to?" Alma cracks. Curly comes in and tells Jack about his horrendous day spent comforting Maureen.

On her way to Gail's, Audrey spots Alf staring lovingly at the corner shop from across the road. "What's up with you?" she asks as she joins him. "I didn't sell it, you know," he says. "The house?" Audrey asks. "Well, the shop came up first at the auction, like, at a knock down price, Audrey. I made a bundle," he tells her with a smile breaking out on his face. The realization that he's bought the shop dawns on Audrey, and she turns her head to face the shop, then turns back to him. "You didn't, did you?" she quietly asks. Alf faces her, biting his lip. "You have, haven't you!" she exclaims. Alf leaves her and walks to the shop to peer through the locked door, leaving an open-mouthed Audrey behind. He chuckles to himself as he straightens. "Oh, Alf," she breathes, and the credits roll.

Sarah Ettritch

Jeff Horton - DICKEN ASHWORTH Doreen Horton - ANNIE RAITT Tom Duckworth - DARRYL EDWARDS Shirley Henderson - SHIRLEY STELFOX Jenny Bradley - SALLY ANN MATTHEWS Auctioneer - KEITH LADD Man at Auction - DAVID WILLIAMS
Written by TOM ELLIOTT Directed by CHARLES LAUDER

Thursday (3599, Monday 27 September 1993)

At the Cafe, Audrey has obviously broken the news of Alf's latest acquisition on the real estate market, and now she's expressing her bewilderment to Alma. Audrey reckons that Alf's a bit like some of those prisoners who've spent so much time behind bars that they've become "institutionalized." She thinks that when Alf saw the opportunity to get his shop back, he just couldn't help himself. Now she's wondering how she's going to explain to folk that Alf bought back his own store. Alma reminds her that when all was said and done, Audrey didn't really want to retire, but Audrey sighs and sees only a future of being tied to the shop... forever.

At the Kabin, a cash-strapped Deirdre asks Rita to cancel their subscriptions to newspapers, magazines... "everything." Mavis tsks that she thinks it's a shame, since she always felt that opening a newspaper each morning was somewhat like "opening the world," but an unimpressed Deirdre can only comment that she can't afford anymore of those little luxuries. As Deirdre leaves the shop, she passes Jenny, who immediately asks Rita if Deirdre is still separated from her husband. Rita confirms that she is, while Mavis chips in that they are still good friends, though. Jen is of the opinion that that sort of situation is "pathetic." As far as she's concerned, if a relationship collapses, that should be the end of it -- no lingering friendships for her! She then asks Mavis if she can walk the dog for her (again) and when Mavis happily agrees, Jenny informs her that she'll bring it by her house later. Mavis' face drops, since she clearly wasn't expecting to be a dog-sitter as well.

Over at The Queen's, Liz tells Colin that she isn't looking forward to her meeting with Andy and Amy. He tells her not to worry about it, and that she's to take as much time as needed to sort things out.

Steve orders tea and a sandwich from Phyllis, and then notices that Andy is seated at a nearby table. Audrey also asks for tea, but is really looking for moral support, wondering again how she's going to explain Alf's recent behaviour to people. Given the way Brendan changed things around (and increased prices), Alma thinks folk will be pleased to see Alf back, but Audrey disagrees, believing people will either think that Alf is "barmy," or that he bought the shop to escape spending his retirement with his wife.

Steve sits down at the table with Andy and tells him that their dad has been spending the morning dusting and cleaning the house, in preparation for "the meeting." He suddenly realizes that Andy is alone, and asks where Amy is, and Andy tells him that he decided he'd sort things out by himself -- "she doesn't have to answer to them." Behind the counter, Phyllis is watching this earnest conversation between the twins, and comments to Alma that she envies them, at their age. Not Alma, though. She wouldn't go back to that time of life for anything. Phyllis laughs and gives her the good news that she won't be given the opportunity.

Liz arrives at Jim's house, and Jim makes it clear that he's very happy to see her. She looks about and compliments him on his housekeeping, and then ponders what they're going to say to Amy and Andy. She even wonders out loud if Amy might be pregnant, adding that she can do without all of this. Jim reminds her that they are the lad's parents, and that they need to stick together.

Outside, Andy is walking very slowly down the street, obviously in no rush to confront his parents. Des approaches, full of glib observations about his days in college, where he was more interested in birds than books. Andy barely responds, his mind clearly on other things, and when Des leaves, Andy pauses for a moment before letting himself in to number 11.

Inside, Jim's first question is to ask where "the wee girl" is, and Andy flatly informs him that she isn't coming. Jim is flabbergasted, reminding Andy that the whole purpose of the meeting was to have a discussion with both of them. Andy tells his dad that Amy wanted to come, but that he told her it wasn't necessary. An angry Liz informs Andy that she really wanted to talk to Amy, so that she could find out first-hand why Amy is willing to allow Andy to "throw away" his life for her. Andy accuses Liz of merely wanting to "have a go" at Amy, which is precisely why he didn't want her there. Liz decides that the discussion is now pointless, and announces that she's going to leave, but Jim tries to stop her, imploring her to give Andy a chance to explain things himself. He offers to make tea for everyone, and then they can sit down and discuss things calmly instead of screaming at each other.

A few doors away, Tracy is giving her mom an ear-bashing, having just learned that her magazine subscriptions were cancelled. Deirdre apologizes for cancelling everything, but also reminds Tracy that she can't afford to pay for the magazines that Tracy enjoys. Tracy goes on at her mother for encouraging her to be an adult and make her own decisions, yet Deirdre turns around and cancels her magazines without even discussing it with her. Seeing Tracy's reasoning, Deirdre offers to go back to Rita and re-install Tracy's subscriptions, but Tracy declines the offer because she was beginning to find them boring anyway. Ah, so it was just the principal of the thing! Deirdre rolls her eyes in exasperation.

Back in the MacDonalds' living room, Liz demands to know if Amy was behind Andy's decision to leave college, but Andy assures her that if anything, Amy was against it -- but he wants to be with her. Both his parents understand that, but they also point out that there's no reason why he can't finish his degree and see Amy -- it's not like Sheffield is a million miles away from Weatherfield. Andy reiterates again that he wants to be with Amy, all the time, and reminds his parents that when they were his age, they were married. Liz doesn't see the parallel, though -- she and Jim had no choice, because she was pregnant. Which logically leads to Liz' next question -- is Amy pregnant? Well, no, Andy demurs... but she does have a little boy, aged five! Liz's mouth falls open at this revelation, and Jim asks about the father of the child. Andy admits that Amy never married the father, and that he has no role in Dominic's life -- they haven't seem him for years. Liz is shocked by all of this, summing up Andy's plans as "taking on a whole family -- to support a woman older than yourself with a child." She makes her opinion clear when she tells Andy that she thinks he's "crazy."

Jim accuses Andy of keeping things from them, since this is the first they've heard of Amy having a child. He scoffs and tells Andy that he's not much older that the kid he's proposing to become a father to, and Andy sarcastically thanks him for this observation. Liz admits that she's surprised that Amy would want Andy to take all this responsibility onto his own shoulders, but Jim can't see a future for them together, advising Andy that they're both setting themselves up for "a load of misery." Andy isn't able to give as good as he's getting in this discussion, so he pulls out his ace, accusing his parents of looking for excuses to put down this relationship. He tells them that Dominic is just another excuse they can use for their disapproval, but "the real reason you want us to split up is that Amy is black!" The mood in the room suddenly changes as Liz lowers her voice, glowers at her son in disbelief, and tells him that what he's just said is "terrible," "ugly," and "untrue." A horrified Jim wonders if that's what Amy thinks is going on too. Clearly backed into a corner, Andy meekly responds that Amy does think this is the case (we all know she doesn't!), and sums up by saying that this (their racism) is the reason he won't be setting foot there again -- and he stomps out. Liz tries to stop him, but sensing the discussion has taken an unexpected (and totally unfair) turn, Jim advises her to let him go.

Outside, Kevin asks Andy if he's alright. Andy sarcastically replies that he's fine -- "you know, like you are when you're in love and everyone's dead happy for you."

At the Rovers Return, Jenny serves Martin a pint and cattily observes that Gail "let's him out" now and then, although she wouldn't be too happy if she knew who was serving him. Martin refuses to take the bait, and comments that he doesn't think it would make a lot of difference. Jenny reminds him that Gail nearly kicked him out over her, but Martin isn't in the mood to be chatted-up by her, so mumbles something before moving off to a table. Meanwhile, Phyllis asks Percy if he's going to attend Olive's wedding tomorrow. He admits that he'll be there; nevertheless, he think "it's a shame" that women of Olive's age can't be content with their memories, rather than "throwing themselves" at somebody else (who isn't him!).

After getting pints, Andy and Steve retire to a booth, where Andy tells him that he finally told his parents about Dominic -- and that he accused them of being against the relationship because Amy is black. Steve is obviously shocked, reminding his brother that while their parents may go off half-cocked on certain issues, they've never been racists. Andy seems to know this, but can't understand why his parents can't see how lovely Amy is -- "that's all that matters, isn't it?"

Jim, meanwhile, has prepared a meal for himself and Liz, and after setting the plates on the table, asks her if she'd like a drink. Liz asks if she could have a whisky, and Jim insists that it be a large one, given what they've just been through. Liz wonders if Jim was aware of Amy's colour before today and he admits that he was, but that it has nothing to do with his reasons for not wanting them together. He reminds Liz that he's Irish -- but that doesn't make him prejudiced. Liz wonders out loud what sort of chance the young pair would have if they did marry, but she also wonders if things might have been different if she and Jim had stayed together. Jim reminds her that they are together -- at least as far as this issue is concerned.

Back at the pub, Tanya (stirring the pot) is telling Bet that she can't repeat any of the things Liz said to her about Bet. Martin is on his way out when Jenny suggests a proper chat sometime -- he courtesly agrees, but it's clear he isn't the least bit interested. Emily offers Percy another drink, but he's in a shirty mood, having spent the last little while with Phyllis, so claims he needs to get home and "rested" for the upcoming wedding. At a nearby table, Audrey tells Rita that she needs to ask Deirdre if she wants her old job back at the shop. Seeing Deirdre at the bar, she goes off to discuss things with her, giving Rita the opportunity to confide in Alma that Deirdre will be relieved to have a job -- she just cancelled all her magazines and newspapers earlier that day.

Over at the bar, Bet and others are incredulous when they hear Audrey tell Deirdre that it will be business as usual at the Corner Shop in just a few days. Deirdre, of course, is happy and relieved to learn that her unemployment is about to end. When asked what happened to Alf's retirement, Audrey laughingly informs people that he's already had it -- and in another year, he'll probably sell up, do it all again, and re-purchase his shop.

Liz still isn't back by closing time at The Queen's, prompting Bob to comment to Colin that whatever Liz' problem was, it was obviously more complicated than she thought. Seeing the unhappy expression on Colin's face, he seems to take a perverse pleasure in wondering out loud if she'll be back at all.

Speaking of the lady, she and Jim have finished their meal, and have retired, with their drinks, to the couch, where they are sitting shoulder-to-shoulder. She's still worrying over the situation with Andy, wondering if he's about to throw his life away, and observes to Jim that it's as though none of the MacDonalds can stand to be happy. Clearly content to have his wife by his side in this domestic scene, Jim responds that he could stand a lot more of this, and asks if Liz would like to stay the night. They were both obviously thinking the same thing, as Liz doesn't object at all. In fact, she wonders if Jim would mind. "Mind?" he replies softly... "It's what I've been praying for."

And on that blissful note, the music comes up, indicating the end to another smashing episode.

Heather Morlan

Written by: PETER WHALLEY Directed by: ROMEY ALLISON

Friday (3600, Wednesday 29 September 1993)

It's the morning after the night before. Liz is frantic at the time, though it's only just gone 7. Jim is assembling breakfast but Liz, mindful of having to make explanations why she wasn't there to close up last night, is anxious to get back to her pub. Jim makes friendly overtures but she seems to keep him at a distance while establishing that Andy hadn't come back last night. Jim hopefully asks if they can talk later as they've just spent the night together, a bit of a turning point as it were. She admirably refrains from hollering or sarcasm so she must not regret last night completely though she's not emitting any warm and fuzzy feelings either. Let's just take it gently, she softly suggests. So, not ruling out a reconciliation but not jumping right back in either, which on the whole, is wise if you ask me. Jim looks a bit more uncertain but she does leave him with a kiss and a few hours to cook up a plan.

Rita scolds a paper lad, Mavis is staring off into space musing and looking quite gormless. She launches into a typical Mavis sort of twitter about the personalities of dogs suiting their countries of origin, and wondering what goes through the mind of an inscrutable but deep Japanese Akito dog. Huh? Pretty much what Rita's response is too but before she can really work up a good sarcasm fit, in comes Derek tripping over his petulant lip and holding up his slipper as evidence. The dog must have got hold of it when Mavis let him in for a lie down after a walk. Derek is outraged at Mavis' carelessness and forbids reentry to the animal and storms off, leaving Rita and Mavis chuckling.

Over at the Queens, Colin curiously asks about the family summit and how late Did Liz get home seeing as he and Bob had to shut up the pub. (Oh that reminds me, I thought Bob was the cellarman when Liz and Jim took over, and didn't he quit which is why she hired Colin in the first place??? And we never actually saw Tanya quit either, did we, we just saw her show up once she heard Bet needed Raquel replacing) Liz avoids too many questions about the family meeting, vaguely saying things got complicated and she got back very late. She tries to change the subject to a new cocktail promotion but Colin is suspicious.

Emily is trying to have a quiet cup of tea before getting ready for Olive's wedding but Percy is soldiering about cleaning the car and working his way down a task list he's written in a little blue notebook, seemingly as if he's mounting a campaign to advance on North Africa! Seems Nobby, Olive's dead husband couldn't abide things not being in top shape. He's driving Emily to distraction though, with his new routes to the church and departure times and arrival times until she takes her tea upstairs to avoid him.

Well, who should appear through the dinnertime crowd at the Queens but Jim. Colin silently fetches Liz while Jim exchanges a friendly "What about yer" with Bob. Jim launches his plan, holding out a long spotted scarf and caressing it as if it were a silk stocking, handing it back to Liz while Colin watches. He makes it clear that Liz spent the night with him and Colin loses his temper when he realizes that's what the "complications" were that Liz was talking about. He quite and rants and tells Jim to take "her" back with him for all he cares. Ah well, Jim smugly explains, "I think you'll find I've already done that, son". Colin storms off and Liz looks chagrinned, Thanks a lot Jim. Jim's not bothered he's upset Colin at all, mission accomplished!

At St. Mary's church, the bridal couple and congregation are just sitting down for a listen to the sermon. Olive looks quite jolly in a red dress and full brimmed black hat with red sash on it. I think more people ought to wear bright colours for wedding dresses, so I do! Percy is horrified to hear the vicar describe with high praise the groom's non-war record as a conscientious objector and nearly comes out of his seat but for the restraining hand of Mrs. Bishop on his shoulder. In the church yard afterward he refuses to shake the vicar's hand and gives him a straight and stern lecture making his feelings quite clear about it all before leaving. Olive only caught the tail end of something and when Emily reveals the cause of Percy's discontent, only shrugs unconcerned. Emily is urged to stay and she agrees she will. The vicar assumes she is Mrs. Sugden but is quickly corrected. He introduces himself as Bernard Morton and it is soon clear that he has taken a shine to our Mrs. Bishop.

In the back room at the Queens Colin and Liz are at it hammer and tongs. Colin is outraged that Liz spent the night with Jim. Liz tries to make excuses and apologizes to young Colin for lying to him. He isn't impressed by her attempts, what? The crisis was such that she needed consoling afterward? Confused, Liz softly says that Jim *is* her husband though only in name. Colin's temper blows and he insists she make up her mind who she wants or he'll make it up for her but seeing her expression, blank and cold in the face of his threats, he backs down and says he's going back to Hartleypool. He issues an ultimatum, be at the bus terminal at 5:30 if she wants him to stay. She's got a pub to open then but he lays the decision at her feet. But we later see Liz open the pub on time with Bob, not looking too torn up about deciding to stay in her little kingdom without his presence. Colin meantime, lurks about the terminal, thinking the approaching taxi holds Liz but is disappointed when someone else altogether gets out and he boards the bus in disappointment.

Quite a different change of scenery now, as we enter into Number 1 with Deirdre and her shopping and where Tracy is sitting and reading. She's a bit stroppy but Deirdre apologizes for the recent tension owing to unemployment and money worries. They become more agreeable but Tracy's face, when Deirdre's back is turned, seems to be rather thoughtful. What's she up to then?

Mavis stumbles into the house breathlessly and near hysteria. She thought she was being followed while walking the dog, having heard footsteps but didn't see anyone. Derek peeks out the front door while Mavis emits a little shriek and pulls Derek's other slipper out of Mitzi's mouth before he can see it. She hides it behind first her then Derek's back as he hugs her close and tells her there is no one out there and the coast is clear. Our Lord Protector even offers to wait by the gate while she takes the dog back to Rita's! on her own!

Jim is triumphant when, in the pub later, Des tells him that Colin left town, a fact which pleases Des as well. Deirdre apologizes to Ken for snapping at him the other day and tells him about getting her job back with Alf. They agree it might help ease the tension at home and Tracy will manage to get on better with her mother now. What other choice does she have after all?

What indeed? We see Tracy pulling books and tapes off the shelf at home and putting them in to a carryall. She picks up a photograph and sentimentally decides to pack that too before going back upstairs (to pack the rest of her things?)

Last orders at the Queens and Jim is back and apologizing for his stunt this dinnertime. Liz calls him on his assumption that he can come in at closing time and automatically get an invite to stay the night. But what about last night and the fact that Colin's gone? Colin wasn't the only reason they were apart, she points out, they were separated before Colin entered the picture. Crushed, Jim realizes last night wasn't an open door. She really doesn't know where they go form there, needing time and no pressure, she explains.

I'm not sure if it's past closing time but Emily is just arriving home, very late, from the wedding. My oh My, she's a bit unsteady and when Percy comes downstairs it's evident that Mrs. Bishop is a wee bit squiffy and on the edge of giggling like a schoolgirl. It's played perfectly by Eileen Derbyshire, not too giggly or slurry, with just enough tiddliness to suggest she's had perhaps one or two more than her usual single sherry. She's had a wonderful evening all due, it seems to the ministrations of the vicar. She toddles off to bed with a fluttery wave of her fingers at Percy who harumphs disapprovingly.

Next door, the house is dark and quiet. Tracy comes downstairs with a suitcase in addition to the carry all and a leaves a note on the table for her mother. It might be after closing because the street outside is empty other than a red van parked across the road by the Kabin. It flashes it's headlights at her and she heads down the pavement but ducks behind a bay window when Jim dejectedly kicks a can down the street as he crosses it and lets himself into his house. She then runs across the road and gets into the van with a smile at a driver whose face we don't see.

Diane Johnston

FIRST APPEARANCE: Rev. Bernard Morton ROLAND MACLEOD LAST APPEARANCE (for quite some time at least) Colin Barnes IAN EMBLETON Olive Clark Turner JOAN SCOTT Bob Cairns STEVE HALLIWELL (and the credits said Jenny, Tanya and Phyllis were in the show but I didn't see any of them? Did they end up on the editing room floor? Unless they were in the background of one of the pub scenes.)
Written by MARTIN ALLEN Directed by ROMEY ALLISON


Originally transmitted: 1, 4, 6, 8 & 11 October 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 31 July - Friday 4 August 2000
Episode Numbers: 3601 - 3605

Monday (3601, Friday 1 October 1993)

A white envelope lies on a purple, quilted table pad. Deirdre enters in a pale pink dressing gown, walks past the table to the kitchen, and switches on the electric kettle. She retrieves a tablecloth from a dresser drawer, and as she shakes it out, notices the envelope. She opens it, and reads. Her jaw drops, and she looks blankly, in shock, then runs to the telephone by the stairs.

Steve and Jim are at breakfast, and Steve tells his Dad that if he and Andy do the upstairs, then Jim can do the downstairs. He'll get the cooker, but they'll get the bathroom, or they could get the lovely Phyllis Pearce to come inJim doesn't know what he's on about. Spring-cleaning before Mum comes home, explains Steve, but Jim grumpily tells him not to hold his breath. Maybe not today, and she'll want the flowers and chocolates, agrees Steve, but Jim is definitely not in the mood, and tells Steve to keep his juvenile sense of humour to himself. Steve is only trying to say that his Dad has almost succeeded in getting Liz back, and he and Andy are pleased about it. Jim snarls back that they didn't care before, and they have some growing up to do. Steve becomes annoyed, finally, and tells Jim that all he was saying was Good on you, Dad, and somehow it got turned into a rubbishing of him and Andy. "Somebody around here is daft all right, but I don't think it's us," he snaps, and leaves.

Back at Deirdre's, she's dressed now, and telling Ken on the phone that she's tried all of Tracy's friends, and no one has seen her. All the note said was that she's leaving, and so Deirdre will go to Maggie Redman's flower shop to speak to her. Deirdre seems more angry than anxious, telling Ken, in exasperation, that she needs this now like she needs a hole in the head.

Across the Street, there's more bickering chez Derek and Mavis. Mavis is irritated that Derek seems to think that she exaggerated the events of the night before, when she thought she had been followed while walking Mitzi. (I named my first dog 'Mitzi', and I'm having poignant flashbacks each time the name comes up, on Corrie this last week). Derek plans to buy Mavis a nerve tonic, at the chemist's! (Pharmacy and/or drugstore) Naturally Mavis bridles, especially when Derek asks her to be logical. "Why would a man follow you?" Especially since she didn't have her handbag! Uh oh! Derek has to assure her that of course she's attractive, feminine, and desirable, but she also has a vivid imagination, since a man might have been there, but quite innocently going about his business. Mavis is unconvinced.

By now, Deirdre has arrived at the flowershop, but it's not yet open. Maggie's van soon arrives, and Deirdre explains her difficulty to Maggie, while helping her unload two boxes-gerberas from Holland, and flowers from Guernsey. "Have you tried Craig?" asks Maggie. "Who's Craig?" asks Deirdre. "Oh dear!" Maggie looks concerned.

At Emily's, Percy is polishing his shoes with vigour when Emily enters the room, looking both smart, and cheerful. Percy is concerned that she might have a hangover, but no, and he's very conciliatory, apologising for his silly behaviour of the previous day, at Olive Clark's wedding. He has to accept it, Emily tells him, and he has, as he's realised that they actually had nothing in common but Nobby, unlike he and Emily, who've lived together for five years. They get along, because they always acknowledge when one of them is in the wrong. He's intending to prepare a bang-up lunch for her, for embarrassing her in front of that no nowt vicar. Sorry, but she's going out for the day, Emily tells him, and won't be home until teatime. She's going to help with the floral displays at St. Xavier's, with Bernard, the no nowt vicar! Percy returns to his shoe polishing in disgust.

In the flowershop, Maggie tells Deirdre that Craig is a driver for one of her wholesalers, and that he seems to be a nice young man. Deirdre is of course upset that she wasn't told about him, as it turns out that Tracy has been seeing him for several months. As they speak, the red van in which Tracy left the night before drives up, and through the window, we see her kissing a dark haired, pony-tailed young man, on the pavement. He gives her a gentle swat on the rear as she leaves him to enter the shop. She isn't at all happy to see Deirdre, but agrees to come home for lunch to talk, even though it won't change her mind about leaving. Deirdre doesn't want them to be enemies, even if they aren't the best of friends at the moment. (I caught only a short glimpse of Craig, but I'm sure I recognised him-he looks like the young actor who played the son of the gambling psychologist, in Cracker-darned if I can recall the name, except that it was Scottish and he was originally a comedian!)

Alma is showing Phyllis a floral blouse, which she has 'selected' from a load of 'seconds' which Mike has dealt for. All it needs is a button, and Alma thought it was perfect for Phyllis, as soon as she saw it. Phyllis is delighted, and will wear it on a special occasion. Des jokes that seeing Percy would be special enough, but to their surprise, she considers Percy a dead loss-he'd chase after Olive Clark, and Emily Bishop, but not her, even with a free gold watch, and her friends have been right all these years! Alma thinks she'd have seen the Queen abdicate before Phyllis would give up Percy, and she and Des share a gentle smile over Phyllis's head. Des tells her that it's Percy's loss, but she thinks she's been silly, all these years, and is glad to have such good friends. Des is ready for a bacon butty, so Alma wonders why he isn't partaking of one of Colin's famous fry-ups? Phyllis is afraid that there's been a family bust-up, but no. Colin felt it was time to move on. Phyllis looks at him dubiously.

At the Queen's bar, a mature and well-dressed lady asks Liz about her Geordie barman. When told of his leaving, for family reasons, Liz explains, she comments on his flirtatious ways, which give the ladies a morale boost, even though they know it's meaningless. She thinks that Liz will miss him around the place, but no one's indispensable, Liz tells her. "Especially fellers," Eileen laughs. (That is what Liz calls her, and if she's appeared before, I don't recall her at all, so I don't know if she's a significant character). Liz has a hard time keeping a pleasant and neutral expression during this exchange. At the end of it, Amy enters the bar, and asks if she and Liz can talk. Liz looks even less cheerful, but nods in agreement.

It must be around 1pm at Deirdre's because Tracy has arrived, and they have a typical parent/teen argument, with the parent being worried about the welfare of the youngster, and the youngster resenting being treated like one. Several facts come to light. Tracy has been staying with Craig, when she was supposed to be with her friend Debbie, and she's also staying with him at his flat now. They have a brief rapprochement, when Doug Murray's name is brought up, but the discussion rapidly deteriorates again. As a parent, and grandparent, I felt that Deirdre was very reasonable and understanding of Tracy's feelings and point of view in this scene. She concedes many points to Tracy, and asks if they can't begin again, as two women together, as they used to have a lot of laughs together, once upon a time. Tracy seems eaten up with resentment, and derides all of her Mother's overtures, even saying that she doesn't recall them ever enjoying each other's company. Deirdre becomes quite sad at the rebuff, and Tracy concludes, that to save Deirdre from having to ask, yes, she's sleeping with Craig, and does know about safe sex. Deirdre asks about tonight, and Tracy says that she's not coming home. She gets up to go, and Deirdre, typical Mother, says that she hasn't had her lunch. (The meal was prepared when Tracy arrived). Tracy tells her, "You have it," but kisses Deirdre's cheek, before leaving.

At the Queen's, another interesting discussion between two women of different generations, but in this case, it seems to be Amy's arguments, which show reason and maturity. She explains to Liz that she understands exactly how she and Jim must feel, as she has a son too, but, she says, Andy has his own reasons for his decisions, about University, work, and love, and he should be allowed to make them, as it's his life. She tells Liz that she hopes that when the time comes, she will have the strength to allow her son Dominic to be the person he wants to be, and not the person she wants him to be. Liz is ready to take umbrage at being criticised as a parent, and, when Amy warns her about losing Andy, assumes that it would Amy's fault. Not so-she knows how much they love Andy, and wants them to know that if he feels pressured, he won't come back for more, but will walk away. Liz looks shocked, whether at Amy's revelation, or her forthrightness, I don't know-perhaps both?

We find ourselves at the Rovers', where Jenny is serving Rita a plate of sandwiches. Rita asks her if she's fallen out with Bet, yet. Jenny retorts that she gets on with folks, to which Rita replies that, she knows Jenny's had her crowns done, but never heard anything about a personality transplant! Jenny says she's a reformed character now, but Rita replies, that's why she's lumbered them all with the canine garbage disposal! Jenny laughs. Bet ambles over to a pensive Percy, and asks what's up, as he's so quiet. He comments on how loneliness is a terrible thing, and friends aren't there when you most need them, as Bet likely knows, since Mr. Gilroy left. Bet looks encouraging, and says she tries not to let it get her down. Percy just looks more fed up and put-upon, as Bet moves off camera.

Ken arrives at Deirdre's saying that he'd called Tracy at the shop, but she didn't say much. Deirdre is upset and angry, supposing that it was the usual attitude-her as the hysterical mother. She explains the facts about Craig, to Ken, who is appalled, and is ready to get a solicitor, since Tracy is only sixteen, and until she's eighteen, can be legally made a ward of court. Deirdre is aghast, as it would destroy her relationship with Tracy, and although she doesn't want it, the best they can do is to try to meet Craig and make the best of it.

It's interesting how these two parent/child situations have been played out in this episode. Both Amy and Tracy point out to the mothers the similarities of their respective situations. Amy asks Liz how old she was when she got married, and Liz says, it's not the same, and she lived to regret it. Tracy tells Deirdre that she and Ken have a bigger age difference than that between her and Craig, and Ken says, it's not the same, since Deirdre was married, and had a child. How one's own experiences can trip one up, when dealing with our children! Neat counterpoints to the plots, I thought.

Derek shows up at the Kabin with a bouquet for Mavis, in apology for his insensitive remarks of the morning. Mavis agrees that he was cavalier, but Derek doesn't know when to keep quiet. "But sometimes you tend to make major mountains out of minor molehills," he explains himself. Rita jumps in before any more damage is done. "I'd quit while I were ahead, if I were you, Derek," she remarks dryly. Mavis isn't completely won over, yet, either. He can really make amends by taking Mitzi for her evening walk. Derek is very reluctant, because of his dog allergy, which offends Mavis all over again, that he'd put his 'alleged' allergy ahead of her physical safety. She pooh-poohs the severity of it, in an outdoor situation, and Rita asks, "What physical safety? Don't tell me it eats people as well as carpets!" Derek explains about the strange man of the night before, as Mavis gets water for the bouquet, and Rita quips that she'd have asked for the man's address, if he'd been good-looking! Derek refers once more to Mavis's fertile imagination, and she says that he'll find out for himself, later, plus the exercise will do him good. Derek concedes defeat in poor grace.

It's teatime, at Emily's, and Percy has prepared a nice apple pie, and has fresh plaice from the market. Emily has had a lovely day, and is thinking of taking a flower-arranging course in the winter. Percy is affable and encouraging, until she tells him that she won't be in for tea. "But you're always in for tea!" Not tonight, however, as Bernard has asked her out for a meal, she tells him, looking shyly pleased. Percy is not a happy man, and slaps his tea towel down onto the counter, after she departs.

Jenny serves Steve with a pint at the Rover's bar, and teases him about running off with her old roommate's younger sister, once upon a time. He riposte's neatly with a barb about her going after other women's husbands. Tanya Pooley's eyebrows almost reach her hairline as she hears this about Jenny. Jenny gives Steve another zinger about being old enough for her in about five years, if she's not busy, but Bet leans over his shoulder and tells her that he's not partial to older women. Jenny's puzzled, so Tanya explains about the rich 'nymphet,' Vicky Arden, but teases him with, "Us older girls have a lot to offer!" He answers that he'll put them on his waiting list, as he might have a vacancy one of these days. The two barmaids are amazed at his chutzpah, and cackle in tandem. Bet, however, looks on with a disapproving eye. Rita tells her that it's only a bit of fun, and Bet responds, "As long as he doesn't break Vicky's heart!" Mavis says that it'll happen sooner or later, unless she's in a nunnery, which makes Alma wonder what Derek has been up to. Rita teases that he's out with another woman, Japanese at that, but Mavis explains about him taking Jenny's dog Mitzi for her evening walk.

Cut to Derek, pooper-scooping in a dark street. I couldn't tell where he was, but there was a lot of litter about, so perhaps a back lane, and, lo and behold, he's being tailed by a tall, dark, stranger! Derek is very nervous, and, between looking behind him, picking his way through the mess underfoot, and all the while holding his scented trophy aloft in one hand, he makes a hilarious picture! Classic Derek!

Back at the Rovers', Percy is no longer at the bar, but seated at a table, sadly contemplating his almost empty glass. Phyllis enters, all dolled up in her gift from Alma, sees Percy, but orders half a lager at the bar. Bet asks if she's on her own, and she says she always is. Percy, amazingly, tells her she can sit with him if she likes. She's all right where she is thanks, she replies. Percy says he could do with a bit of company, but Phyllis replies that she never saw him jump to keep her company when she felt the same. "Stop where you are, then. I'm not begging." "It wouldn't get you anywhere if you did!" she retorts. As this scene plays out, Mavis and Alma look on with increasing interest, from their booth. He tells Bet to serve Phyllis a rum and blackcurrant, and Phyllis looks pleased, but would rather have a snowball, as the rum makes her head ache. She goes over to his table after all, and sits down, ramrod straight, in her chair. Mavis and Alma leave their booth and join Bet at the bar, watching with smiling faces. "Nice blouse. New, is it?" asks Percy, looking Phyllis up and down. She nods proudly. "Are my eyes going, or is he actually being nice to her?" asks Bet, in sheer amazement. "Quick, look outside. The sky could be full of flying pigs!" says Alma. "Maybe she's slipped summat in his ale," says Bet. "If she has, I'll have some for Derek! He's been very tetchy lately," Mavis begins, when the man himself stumbles headlong into the pub, gasping, and looking a little the worse for wear. "Help! Call the police, Bet! I've been mugged!" Shock and cries all around. What happened? Bet offers a brandy. "Did they get your wallet?" she asks, as Mavis witters about Derek, in dismay. "No, the dog! I'm sorry, Jenny," he explains sadly. Bet turns and looks at Jenny. Jenny turns aside, and faces the camera in close-up. Her expression shows that she isn't surprised.

Ruth Hempsey

Maggie Redman - JILL KERMAN First Appearance of Craig Lee - KIERAN O'BRIEN (?)First Appearance of Eileen Carter - LESLEY STAPLES Amy Nelson - LOUISE DUPREY Tanya Pooley - EVA POPE Jenny Bradley - SALLY ANN MATTHEWS
Written by - ADELE ROSE Directed by - ROMEY ALLISON

Tuesday (3602, Monday 4 October 1993)

In the Kabin flat Rita is calling, "Mitzi! Mitzi!" Seems she's unaware of the previous evening's dogknapping. Jenny appears in her nightwear complaining of Rita's loud voice. Rita hopes Mitzi isn't under her bed having a breakfast of slippers. (Fluffy bunny ones?) Jenny tells her that she'll be delighted to hear that Mitzi has gone. She says she would have told Rita last night but she was asleep (snoring according to Jenny) when Jenny got back from work at the Rovers. Rita wants to know where Mitzi has gone, but not before refuting that she snores. Jenny tells her that someone pinched the dog while Derek was out walking her. Rita expresses surprise and says that although she didn't pretend to like the animal it didn't deserve that. "What did the police say?" Jenny admits she didn't call the police because she knows who took the dog. She tells Rita that Robert took the dog to hurt her because he knows how fond of Mitzi she is. "That's how vindictive he is. Honestly Rita," she moans "Why do I have such lousy taste in men?"

At number one, a distraught Deirdre rushes to open the door - but it's only Ken. "Any word of Tracy?" Ken shakes his head. "I thought at least she might have brought her dirty washing back," says Deirdre with a mixture of tearfulness and sarcasm. Ken tells her not to let the situation get to her. "Oh I'm not." retorts Deirdre. "On top of the world me. I'm thinking of going out to celebrate my freedom! I've no husband, no daughter and no money. I've never had it so good!" Ken makes sympathetic noises and tells Deirdre that Tracy has no right to put her through this grief. Deirdre replies "According to Tracy, I'm the one totally in the wrong!" Ken decides he will go and see Tracy and sort things out. Deirdre asks him not to go threatening wards of court and the like. Ken says he will try and make Tracy see sense. Deirdre responds that he's welcome to try but doesn't hold out much hope. She breaks into tears as Ken leaves.

In the Kabin, Derek is wondering if Jenny knew he might be at risk for being mugged. "You weren't mugged! At worst you got a slight shove." Derek is looking for sympathy but Mavis is getting her own back for the lack of concern he displayed when she thought she was being followed. Gail overhears this and wants to know what's been going on. Rita explains how Jenny's husband took the dog off Derek. "Only the way he's going on anyone would think he'd been set on by a gang of Hell's Angels instead of a dentist!" (Mavis will have her pound of flesh) "A very large dentist!" Derek grumbles. "He could have had a knife for all I knew." "Or a drill," remarks Rita dryly. Gail asks why Robert didn't just ask Jenny for the dog. "Because he knew how much the dog meant to her and that she'd never give it up," explains Rita. "So he just took her?" Gail asks. "That's weird!" Rita agrees and looks thoughtful.

Emily is mixing a cake. Percy is mixing with Emily. First her tells her that chocolate cake will make a change from Victoria Sponge. (Not that her sponge isn't almost as light as his is) Then he tells her that a spoonful of strong coffee would bring out the flavour of the chocolate beautifully. Emily bites her tongue and says she prefers to use vanilla. Percy persists. He is wondering why all the baking is going on. He also notes she is making lemon curd tarts. Is it Emily's birthday? "No that's on the eighteenth, I never forget a date," says Percy. Emily tells him why she is baking. "You're going to all this bother for a vicar?! He won't appreciate it. It's all preaching and no pleasure with them. Shop bought would've done!" Emily draws a deep breath and expresses the idea that since she knows Percy does not see eye to eye with the Rev. Morton he should make alternative arrangements for tea-time. Percy is aghast! "You're turning me out!" Emily says only for a couple of hours and reminds him that she was very accommodating when he was seeing Mrs. Clarke. "But that was different! I was courting Mrs. Clarke . . . You're not courting the vicar are you?" Emily assures him that Bernard is just coming round for a cup of tea and a chat - on our own. Percy realizes he is not wanted. "Well you can ask the Archbishop of Canterbury round for all I care! he says huffily as her runs his finger round the now emptied mixing bowl. "I still say that some coffee would be an improvement," is his parting shot. Emily raises her eyes and prays for deliverance.

Jenny is on Rita's couch watching a fashion programme on TV. She is still in her nightwear. There is a large pile of ironing on the hatch shelf. Rita appears in the kitchen with shopping. "Going for the 'Queen Slut' title are we?" Rita enquires through the hatch from the kitchen. (BTW the use of 'slut' is in the sense of not doing any housework, in this case ironing, not a comment on Jenny's morals) Jenny says she's having a break. Rita replies that people usually have a break after they've got stuck in, not before. Jenny tells Rita she is becoming a serious nag. She gets up to start the ironing and Rita tells her that while she's doing it she can explain further about the dogknapping dentist. Jenny is evasive but Rita persists. She wants the whole story because from what she saw of Robert he was not the type to go in for petty spite. Confronted, Jenny admits that Robert took the dog because Mitzi belongs to him. "So you took his dog, not t'other way round. Do I get to know why?" "Because it's worth a lot of money." "Ah! money. Now we know we're in spitting distance of truth! How much?" Jenny tells Rita that Mitzi was worth about £1,000 and the pups £500 or £600 each. Rita is horrified. "That's not a dog, that's a walking goldmine!" Jenny defends herself by telling Rita Robert left her to go back to his wife. She had no money and she was entitled to get something out of the relationship. Rita tells her in no uncertain terms that she was not entitled to take other people's property and make Rita an accessory after the fact. Jenny turns on Rita. "I might have known you'd be on anybody's side but mine! And to think for all those years I thought of you as my mum!" Rita is stonefaced. Jenny plays the Poor Little Orphan card. "My Mum gets run over, my Dad turns into a psychopath and then I end up with you! When it comes to family I certainly struck out didn't I?!" Jenny bangs our of the room leaving Rita in shock.

Alf and Audrey call by Deirdre's house. Alf is checking on when Deirdre can start back at the shop. She tells him it will have to be towards the end of the week as she has a few things to sort out. Audrey tells Alf to go ahead and order her a cheese salad as she wants a quick word with Deirdre. When Alf has gone Audrey tells Deirdre that she was in the cafe and Gail wasn't gossiping(!) but she and Alma are worried about her. Deirdre protests that they don't have to be but Audrey says she knows Deirdre thinks she's a bit of a bubblehead but basically she's been there, done that and got the T- shirt. "At least you're still talking to one another," says Deirdre. Audrey tells her that for years she and Gail hardly saw each other let alone spoke. "It was something in my past that she didn't approve of so she packed her bags and left." "Funny how the past can shatter the present," says Deirdre ruefully, "and they're so quick to make judgements!" Audrey agrees. "Our Gail was sixteen too." Deidre realizes she has more in common with Audrey than she thought. She invites her to have a cup of tea. "How long did it take before you were speaking again?" Audrey tells her a long time but they finally worked things out. Deirdre finds it unbearable to think it might be months before she and Tracy are friends again.

At the flower shop Tracy is dealing with a customer. She is not happy to see Ken. Maggy is at lunch and has left Tracy in charge. "Some people think I can be trusted to do things without making a mess of them," she tells her father. Ken tells her it's not that Deidre doesn't trust her but she knows nothing about this boyfriend. Tracy tells Ken that Craig is not a boy he's a man. "All the more cause for concern," replies Ken. He wants Tracy to come round to the house for supper and a chat but she declines. She tells him she's not cutting herself off completely but she wants Dierdre to get used to the idea. Ken manages to get Tracy to give him her address in case of emergency but he must promise not to give it to Dierdre. Ken tells her that this is very unkind to Deirdre but he agrees. "If you break your word, that's it. I'm finished with both of you. I mean it Dad." Ken can see she does.

In the Rovers Jenny serves a customer. She approaches the till and asks Bet if she can have a word after work. "Have it now," Bet tells her. Jenny says she thinks she's going to have to give her notice. She assures Bet the other staff aren't the problem - it's Rita. "She doesn't want me here." Bet is surprised. "Has she said so?" "No" says Ms. Skirts-the Truth, "but it's obvious I'm getting under her feet." Bet suggests that Jenny find somewhere else to live but Jenny says she can't find anywhere she can afford. "Rita's been sweet, she hardly charges me anything. . " (If nothing is hardly anything!) Jenny says she has some friends down South. (that means south of Ashton-under-Lyne!) She'll crash with them. Bet looks concerned. "Don't worry about me I'll survive. I've had to so far." Bet says nowt. Is she buying this line? Jim enters the Rovers and sees Audrey's cheese salad on the table by Alf. He wants to know if Audrey's got him on a diet. Alf puts him straight. He is wondering where Audrey's got to. "What do women find to jabber about when they get together?" "Our failings as husbands no doubt about it," say Jim. "Things no better between you and Liz then?" says Bet as she picks up Alf's hotpot dish. She tells Jim she's an optimist where such things are concerned and lives in hopes of people coming to their senses before it's too late. Jim reminds her that she and Alec didn't come to their senses. "But we weren't exactly love story of the century" she tells him. Jim does not want to hear about love. It causes more trouble than it's worth. "My lad's thinking of jumping in the deep end now and he's barely out of nappies!(diapers)." Bet tells him Vicky is far too sensible to let either of them to do such a thing. "Not Steve! The other one, the sensible one." He tells Bet what Andy is proposing to do. "Well it says something for the lad if he's willing to take on the responsibility." This is not what Jim wants to hear. Bet tells him even those who are older and wiser and live in palaces get it wrong. "If it was my son, I'd wish him good luck and let him get on with it."

Percy is disembowling Emily's sideboard drawers. "Have you looked in your room?" asks Emily pointedly. He tells her he had it here yesterday, to look up her birthday. He is talking about his diary. "Thought you never forgot a date," says Emily with barely disguised sarcasm. More rummaging. Emiliy is getting a little exasperated, "Mr. Sugden, must you have your diary right now?" Apparently he must. He has promised to phone someone and the number is in the diary. The door bell rings. Emily throws up her hands and goes to answer the door. Bernard thrusts a bunch of flowers into her hands. He was obviously impressed with her flower arranging skills at the church. "For you to wreak your own brand of magic on," he beams. (Strange choice of word seeing that it's usually got a somewhat negative cast to it) Emily assures him her floral skills are more good luck than good judgement. Percy is still rummaging as Emily and Bernard enter the dining room. He rummages throughout the introductions. He continues to rummage through the sideboard. "Can't you phone your friend tomorrow? asks Emily more pointedly than before. Percy won't take the hint. He has to call his friend today. Emily suggests Directory Enquiries. Percy tells her it costs to do that and besides he doesn't know the address as that's in his diary as well! Emily smiles bravely. When will this gooseberry fool shift himself?

Bet drops into the Kabin. Rita is rearranging the cards. "I've been having a few words with young Jenny. She tells me you want shot of her." Bet pleads Jenny's case. "I know she's given you a lot of aggro in the past - but you're all she's got." Rita is still upset. She asks Bet if she bothered she's got to advertise for a new barmaid. Bet turns to go. "OK Nowt to do with me." Rita relents. She apolgizes to Bet. "I haven't told her to go." Bet says Jenny reckons she's about to. Rita tells her she probably was a while ago. "But we'll soldier on a bit longer. Everyone deserves a second chance." Mavis puts in her two cents. "More like her twenty-second chance!" Bet tells Rita she knows Jenny's taking advantage and only paying her peanuts for her keep but she is a bit of company for her. "Peanuts!" Rita sighs. How much more soldiering can she do?

At Emily's the gooseberry has finally departed. Emily apologies for serving tea late. "If I had served the tea while he was here we never would got rid of him!" Bernard beams at the tea table and says he wouldn't blame Percy. Bernard says he could (metaphorically) kill for a slice of that wicked looking chocolate cake. Bernard thinks Emily is very compassionate to take in a lonely soul like Percy. Not that compassionate. Emily confesses that she told Percy to make himself scarce as she wanted to avoid an 'atmosphere'. "I'm afraid he's rather taken against you." "Poor old boy's probably jealous, says Bernard. "He may resent someone else stepping into what he considers to be 'his' territory." Emily is quick to assure Bernard there is nothing like that between her and Percy. "You may be convinced of that, my dear," replies Bernard, "But is Mr. Sugden?" Emily has not thought of this before. Eeeeew! Scary!

Rita is on her sofa, leafing through a magazine. Jenny enters and is surprised that Rita is upstairs. "I wanted a word with you," says Rita. Jenny thinks it's about the ironing but Rita tells her it's not. "Why did you tell Bet I was going to chuck you out?" Jenny denies she said that. "Well Bet seems to think you did. That's why you handed your notice in. Counting on the sympathy vote were we?" Jenny tells he she didn't hand in her notice but she'll have to if Rita won't let her stay on. "Why would I want to get shot of such an ideal flatmate?" asks Rita sarcastically. "Maybe I shouldn't expect you to do your share of the chores seeing as you told Bet you pay for the privilege of living here." Jenny is defensive. Rita has never asked her for any money. She only said that to Bet because she didn't want her to think that she was sponging. Rita tells Jenny that all the lies have got to stop, they'll get on a lot better in the long run. Jenny knows which side her bread is buttered. She capitulates immediately and apologizes. "I don't deserve a friend like you." "Now that's the first true word you've said," says Rita. Jenny promises to do the ironing and cook supper. "Now don't turn into Pollyanna overnight," says Rita. "I couldn't stand the shock!" Not much danger there.

At Jim's Cafe, Percy is telling his woes to Phyllis. "I'm left to roam the streets while she's entertaining her fancy-man!" Phyllis is not backward in coming forward. "You're roaming no streets Petal, you're coming back to my place!" Gail and Alma are witness to Phyllis' opportunistic courting tactics. "The old girl's living proof of 'persistance pays'," giggles Gail. Alma is more fatalistic. "There's another saying, be careful what you wish for - you might get it!" Phyllis is busy sweetening the offer with a promise of rice pudding. Percy is playing hard to get. "I only have to stay out a couple of hours!" "And get back in time to wash their dirty dishes and eat their leftovers!" prompts Phyllis. Percy says he can't stop out late without telling Emily. Phyllis is a master of psychology. Emily has made it clear she is going to lead her own life he should the same. Hm, having satified himself that Phyllis' rice pudding is up to stratch ("Do you put a lump of best butter in your rice pudding?" "Aye and brown sugar and plenty of nutmeg on top!") Percy decides it wouldn't hurt to let folks know he can't be taken for granted. Phyllis can't believe her luck! Alma and Gail give her the thumbs up as she and Percy leave.

A frantic Dierdre lets Ken into number one. He tells her to calm down but she's in no mood for such advice. "It will do you no good when you deal with Tracy," Ken tells her. "So she wants to see me?" Ken has to admit not yet. "She thinks you both ought to have time to cool off." Deirdre is angry. "What she really means is the longer she stays away the less chance there is of us getting her to come back!"

Jim is at the bar with Alf and Audrey. Jim remarks that the signwriters must have made a fortune out of Alf. Alf replies, "They would have, if I hadn't had the foresight to put the old sign to one side. Mind you there's some people (pointed look at Audrey) who think I should've chucked it on the midden!" Audrey remarks that she thought Alf was obessed before but now it's shop morning noon and night. Jim says, "Don't knock it. I wish I had my old business back." Jenny asks after Jim's sons and says she expects all the girls are buzzing round. Bet tells her Jim's sons' romances are a bit of a sore point at the moment but notices Jenny's brighter mood. Jenny tells her that she isn't going to leave. She and Rita have had a little chat and everything's just fine. Derek and Mavis watch her from across the bar. Mavis is incensed. "Look at her she's hasn't a care in the world!" Derek remarks that she palms them off onto everybody else. "The girl is nothing but trouble and I have every intention of telling her so!" Jenny appears around the corner of the booth. "Everything OK with the Wiltons?" Derek smiles weakly. Maybe he won't say anything right now. Mavis looks resigned. She knows he won't say anything - ever.

Back at number one Deirdre is still hashing things out with Ken. "If she won't meet us and discuss it we're no further forward! We don't know the boy. We don't know where she's living." Ken looks awkward. "Yes we do." Ken tells her the conditions under which Tracy revealed her address. Deirdre is stunned. "That's ridiculous!" Ken agrees. "But we have to face it. Right now she's the one calling the shots." Deidre's face crumples. "Oh Ken, she's my daughter. How did we ever get to this?"

Libby Seekings

Rev Morton ROLAND MacLEOD
Written By ADELE ROSE Directed By BRIAN MILLS

Wednesday (3603, Wednesday 6 October 1993)

Alf, with bucket, rag and a very self-satisfied sigh, walks out into his back garden. He goes to the garage, hauls out his "Alf's Mini-Mart" sign and with the comment "some things are meant to be" proceeds to wipe it clean.

A Vogue mag ( i think it was that one) pushed through the letter box accompanies a knock on Dierdre's door. It's just Ken at the door and he asks her how she is doing. In short, not great is the answer. Ken tells her that he is going to go over to Tracy's flat to see her that afternoon and will report back to Dierdre after the meeting. Dierdre, in total happiness mode (not!), wonders what kind of squalor T is living in and comes up with the line "we're parents and damned for it"

Rita is having her cereal and juice when Jenny walks in wondering if R is still cross with her. "Don't be silly, Jenny. I'm just wondering what games you're playing now." J protests that they're aren't any games and she is grateful to R for putting up with her, a difficult task she knows. R tells her that as long as she respects her, her flat and isn't deceitful, J is more than welcome to stay. Jenny tells her that she is a lovely person and that she deserves to be happy with someone. Rita says "if I lack for company, I'll buy meself hamster". Jenny laughs and tells her that she's always had a sense of humour. Rita responds by saying she has but it had been sorely tested the past few years. "How's that?" "That's when I met your family." She leaves, pauses in the doorway, and tells her "oh by the way, get shut, will you." as the camera focuses in on the dog bed and bowls.

With a "Cooey" and a baguette, Audrey arrives home. Alf asks her is she wants to go with him this morning or wait until the afternoon when there is a delivery due. She's thrilled with the choice she has to make ! Alf decides that it is probably better to go in the am as it will be a clearer path for them to do all the cleaning. Audrey tells him she'll go in the afternoon and shows him her hot bread, feta and garlic sausage as she wants to go "all continental " for breakfast. He tells her he has too much to do and that he has scrubbed his sign so it look as good as new. "Ring out the church bells". Alf gives in to her "bread and cheese" breakfast and continues on about his sign - what made him hold on to it, didn't it give her goose pimples and that he was guided to it. Audrey just tells him he's too cheap to throw anything away! Alf is in such a good mood, agrees with her there and says it has saved him 200 quid. Tells her to make the sarnies and asks if she has parked in the usual spot - the road. She tells him, the garage. He looks at her "you never have" and pops out to look and yes, she hit the sign and it is now in two!

Emily is working on her car boot sale posters and Percy is complimenting her on her nice work of it. He then goes on about how religion would fail to exist without people like her putting in all hours of work on its behalf. He uses the word exploited She makes the comment that some of the "exploited" volunteers have the patience of saints but some, and turning her head slowly towards Percy whilst saying it "are less tolerant and need time and space to themselves or they're inclined to start screaming." (lol!)

At the Kabin, Mavis tells Jenny that Rita has gone to the wholesalers and can she help? Jenny tells her that an estate agent has rung and wants to view her house. Mavis asks if she told them that Rita will phone back, receives the affirmative answer, and says well she won't be long, I'm sure they'll wait. Clearly with an ulterior motive in mind, Jenny asks Mavis if she wants a cup of coffee. Mavis says no. Then, Jenny tells her that it's a shame Rita is selling the house as it offers her so much more than her pokey flat and Oak Hill is a really nice area. She also tells Mavis that if Rita held on to the house until the next boom, she'd make a killing. Mavis tells her that Rita doesn't care about killings and that it would cost Rita very dear to live in that house again with all the unpleasantness. Jenny, surprised, says that she thought Rita and Ted got along well. Mavis tells her they did but that after he died, the will was contested by the family. Jenny jumps to the conclusion that Rita lost Ted's money but Mavis tells her she won the judgement and then, sensing she has said too much, shuts up. Jenny has a very nasty smile on her face at this news.

It's a mite slow at the Rovers and Tanya tells Jack "And I thought the Queens was boring". Jack tells her that it's not boring just that all of them there are intellectual quiet thinkers. That brings a smile to her face as she tells him to show her one but not to say Jim MacDonald is one. Jack goes on to say that he is suffering silently as are most men. Tanya tells him that he , Jack, still has his wife so what does he have to complain about. "I'll introduce her to you one day" comes the response! Denise walks in and Jim offers to get her drink for her. She accepts, he tells her he would like talk to her as he values her opinion as a woman and they go to talk. Alf comes in for a drink and a hotpot but is disappointed as Betty is off and is offered a cheese butty instead. over to Jim and Denise - he seems a bit uncomfortable to start with as he tells her that he and Liz slept together a few weeks back and that now, Liz doesn't want to do so again. He says that it was good for the pair of them and he can't understand what is going on. Denise tells him that she is probably protecting herself ( okay i lost a bit here as there was a very wierd commercial break here). we jump to Tanya talking about Cannes to Jenny and Denise ( who is now at the bar with Jim). Jim then tells Denise that she made him think and hops on out of the Rovers. ( okay so he didn't actually hop but he was quick as a bunny! ) Jenny tells the girls that in 10 years time, she will be in the wealthy suburbs of London owning two beauty salons. In 15 years, she'll have a chain of salons which she will sell and then buy a yacht. Tanya asks her where she's getting the 2 salons. "well, you see, i am an orphan so no one is going to die and leave me money... I ;ve got to do it myself." Denise calls her poor little orphan annie and that just because people have parents doesn't mean they get a free ride. Jenny tells her that she's not complaining as it gives her an advantage <puts on very conniving, evil look> makes her less sentimental.

Cue Rita. She talks to Emily about the car boot sale and her posters. Rita then goes into the Kabin and talks to Mavis. Mavis asks whether she told Jenny about the will. Rita tells her that she told Jenny that but that Jenny was very interested. Rita asks what she did tell her. Mavis admits that she said that it wasn't just financial reasons for the house sale, that it was the general unpleasantness that went with it. "SO, in other words, you told her all about it. It doesn't matter. Mavis. She'll gain nothing from it." Mavis is relieved until Rita continues with " And I never did say it was a secret, did I? So I've only myself to blame, haven't I?" Totally flummoxed, Mavis counters with "You know, Rita, she will thumb through those magazines." !!

Ken is outside 40A whose bell has the name of Craig and a smiley face beside it. He presses the button.

Mike is at the garage and catches Jim calling the citizen's advice number. He hangs up the phone and asks Jim what his problem is. Jim says that it is personal and Mike tells him to get himself a lawyer. He gives him the name and number of Brendon Perkins and to mention Mike's name when Jim calls him. Mike is in an ebullient mood as he has just seen his son play rugby. He then asks what Jim would call it - rugby or rugger. Jim tells him he'd call it a game that posh kids play.

Ken is sitting ion a chair in Craig's flat.. He says that if they can't agree then they can be adult about it. He tells him that they feel Tracey is too young and that her leaving school was a shock and a waste. Ken says that she could do better than be in a flower shop. Says that to have their daughter leave home at 16 and shack up is not what they expected for her. Craig, who has shuffled cards throughout this, manages to raise an eyebrow at this. The silent one actually speaks after Ken, clearly uncomfortable, looks at his watch and says that he expected her to be there by now. "Yeah, sometimes she goes shopping." Ken, desperate to make some sort of contact with him, asks if he plays the guitar in the corner. "Yeah." Ken tells him he plays the trumpet. Asks whether Craig plays with a group locally. "Yeah." Then, so you drive the florist van then. "That's right." Ken tells him that's good, it's a decent job. "It's a crap job." Oh right says Ken, a fill in job for you then, well, good for you. Craig then says"can I ask you something?" Ken appears more than willing to not be the inquisitor! "Did you pick the name Tracey?" (Ken's unbelieving face was so funny! Here, he thought that maybe he had got through to this boy and that was Craig's only response to his whole spiel!! And those cards Craig had must have had their numbers shuffled off during this scene!)

Back at the Rovers(which is just jumping now), Dierdre is here but doesn't want a drink. She asks Jack if Ken has been in. He tells her no and she says that she will check back there in half an hour.

Ken is still at Craig's but has a teacup in his hands now. He is telling both Tracey and Craig that even though she is adopted, he feels as much for her as for his own kids. He gives it up and decides to go. Tracey sees him to the door and Ken tells her that he is determined not to lose touch with her. He tells her that it is unbearable and to think of her mother. She tells him that he shouldn't have gone there and he agrees, telling her that he's sorry if he embarrassed her. She tells him that she's sorry if she's a bad investment. He "oh Tracey's" her but she says that all she ever hears is his feelings, what about hers? She loves dierdre but she couldn't stick it anymore. She tells him that he couldn't stick it and he left (wild eyeball movements here from Ken) so how can he criticize her? He says that he came to see how she was and he'll go now. He tells her that they care desperately for her and she says "then leave me alone." ( not a word from Craig this time and the cards were gone)

At the Rovers, Ken tells Dierdre about the visit. A mistake to go there, a decent enough flat but a mistake to go there as he embarrassed her. He calls Craig bloodless, totally in charge, gave nothing, just sat and observed. He says that he's a bit unnerving. Deirdre asks if he's nice to Tracey. He tells her he couldn't really tell but she seemed okay. He says that Tracey wants her freedom and he thinks that Dierdre and he will just have to accept that she is gone.

Rita is on the sofa as Jenny is trying to persuade her not to sell the house. It is the wrong time to put it on the market. Rita tells her that she doesn't need the hassle of the house and that she is happy where she is. jenny then tells her that she thinks the house would be the perfect place for the two of them. Jenny would do all the work there, Rita could sell the flat , have a big chunk in the bank and Rita wouldn't be alone anymore. "I think it would be brilliant for you", trills jenny. Rita looks at her and says " do you know? you frighten me." "Me?" laughs Miss sugar-wouldn't-melt-in-her-mouth. Rita tells her that her father tried to get the house off of her, too. Jenny insists that she is only thinking of Rita and that she knows Ted would not have wanted her to be alone the rest of her life. Rita is affronted and tells Jenny that she had never even heard of him until a week or two ago and how dare she tell her what he would have wanted. Jenny says sorry but that she is only thinking of Rita. Rita says she is sorry too. Sorry that she doesn't believe her. She sees her plan and she is selling the house. She tells Jenny that she is a Bradley and not to forget it as she,Rita, never will. Credits roll over the upset face of Jenny.

Judith Cooper

Craig Lee KIERAN O'BRIEN
Written by STEVEN MALLATRATT Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Thursday (3604, Friday 8 October 1993)

Alfie, in his glory, unpacks some things from the wholesalers. He drones on about some revolting pork pie/pickle combination he saw there while Deirdre listens half-heartedly. She's pricing a case of beans (means Heinz) but her mind is obviously on Tracy and her new living conditions.

A suit-clad Jim arrives at his solicitor's office, he has come to see about a divorce so he has.

In the Kabin, Kev peruses the anniversary card selection. He decides they are all too romantic (and why not the card is only for his wife after all), he'd prefer a funny one or a mucky one. Mavis asks how many years married now? Seven, replies Kevin. Jack overhears and says 'celebrating' an anniversary is unnatural; it's a solemn occasion, like Remembrance Day. As Kev pays for the card Jenny bursts in, she's very excited and has a business proposal for Rita she wants to discuss, over dinner that night which she will prepare for the both of them. Rita tells her it better not have anything to do with Ted's house. Of course this sets Miss. Conniving Minx into a defensive strop and she storms up to the flat.

Jim is telling Mr. Lloyd (the solicitor) all the gory details about his marriage to Liz. Mr. Lloyd advises if there is no chance of reconciliation then divorce by mutual consent is the best option. You mean where the marriage is over but no one is to blame asks Jim. He's not having that so he isn't. He says the marriage is over but Liz is definitely to blame.

Audrey arrives at the shop and mocks Alf's enthusiasm for his new-old store. Alf goes back to the storeroom. Audrey notices how depressed Deirdre is. Deirdre tells her all about Tracy. Audrey makes light of it by telling Deirdre that Tracy is just trying to find her independence and that most of this is probably just an act for Deirdre's benefit. D says she'd just feel much better if she could meet Craig and see where she's living. Audrey tells her to go and do it then!

Rita arrives in the pub and sees Jenny at a table by herself. Rita apologizes for jumping to conclusions. Jenny says she's sorry too. They agree that dinner is back on for that evening and they will have a talk about Jenny's proposition.

Mr. Lloyd escorts Jim out to the elevators. They agree to petition Liz for divorce based on unreasonable behaviour. If that's what Jim really wants, of course. Jim assures Mr. Lloyd that's exactly what he wants, so it is!

At No. 13, Ivy is babysitting Rosie while Kevin and Sally go out for an anniversary dinner. Turns out they are going to a Greek restaurant in Bolton; it all sounds very posh AND they are invited guests of the owner (a grateful garage customer). Sally appears and she does look lovely; she's wearing a pale green suit, full make-up and a twee velvet headband.

Deirdre's outside 40A, she rings Craig's smiley face buzzer. He opens the door whilst putting on a shirt.

D asks to see Tracy. "Who are you?" asks surly Craig. "Her Mother!" says D.

"Tracy, its your Mum" bellows Craig. He starts up the stairs followed closely by Deirdre who is threatening him with all sorts (not the licorice variety) should anything happen to Tracy.

Tracy bursts in with a "What are you doing here?" Hmm - looks like this will not be the tearful Mother/Daughter reunion D had hoped for. Deirdre tries to reason with Tracy to get her to come home. Tracy won't budge. Deirdre then orders Tracy to come home with her and, predictably, Tracy chucks her out!

In the Rover's, Alf is handing out leaflets announcing the grand re-opening of his new-old shop. Jim enters, spies Denise and begins to tell her all about his adventure at the lawyer's office. Alf ponders the re-opening of the shop with Rita, he's well convinced that all the custom will have defected to Mr. Patel's (Alf's Grocer Nemesis).

Kev & Sally pull up in front of the little Greek bistro - it's called Burgermania! And - for reasons that escape me - the sign has a red Maple Leaf at one end and a cartoon Mountie with a burger for a head at the other end (really, I checked the tape twice!). Why?? A nod to Greek-Canadians perhaps?

Rita and Jenny finish their meal. Rita is very impressed with it and tells Jenny so. Turns out Jenny honed her culinary skills entertaining all Robert 's posh friends. This sets her off on a bout of self-pity, poor me/I have no one/blah blah blah/boo hoo. She goes to get the dessert and refills Rita 's wine glass along the way. Rita protests, she's drinking all the wine and will end up tiddly. Hands up, who thinks this is all part of the scheme? Jenny tells her its OK after all they are celebrating. "What," asks Rita. Jenny tells her it's a surprise. Rita can't help looking a bit suspicious.

At No. 1 Deirdre is cramming all Tracy's remaining stuff into black garbage bags. Ken knocks at the door, D lets him in and tells him all about the botched visit to Tracy's.

At Burgermania! Kev is apologizing to Sally about the mix up; because the owner drives a Mercedes and mentioned owning a restaurant Kevin assumed it was a cozy Greek bistro not a Kebab House. Sally says it's OK and as long as they are out together then it's special (urgh!). Just then the owner appears with two plates of special mixed kebab, salad & chips plus a bottle of white wine. (No poutine, no Molson's?). He also enlists his son, Philip, to serenade Kev & Sally much to the amusement of two drunk punters waiting for their kebab-to-go. Sally tucks into her meal and declares it gorgeous.

At Rita's Jenny is pitching her idea. She wants Rita to invest £30,000 in a beauty salon. The idea is that Jenny will run it but Rita will handle the 'business' side of affairs and they will be partners. Needless to say Rita doesn't look too convinced.

In the Rovers, Deirdre continues to tell Ken about the ordeal with Tracy. Ken, resplendent in a grey cardie, shirt & tie, replies with a thinly veiled "I told you so!"

At another table Jim continues to bore the arse off Denise with tales of his marital woes. He's decided she's Weatherfield's expert on divorce - I suppose she is really - and he bombards her with questions about divorce proceedings.

Moment of truth time - Rita turns down Jenny's proposal. Rita cuts through the 'partnership' waffle and gets to the point - Jenny wants Rita to loan her £30,000. Rita says no.

Jenny - trying very hard to remain calm - asks for half of that suggesting she might be able to get the remainder from the bank. Rita still says no. Jenny snaps and shows her true colours:-

"Well why not? What else are you going to do with it?" she demands.

"I think that's my business, don't you" says Rita.

"Great, great" says Jenny, ripping up the papers for the salon "Another brilliant idea down the drain. It's not right you know, I've had just as much unhappiness as you have."

"No one's saying you haven't," Rita concedes.

"Yeah, but every time something bad happens to you, you always manage to profit from it."

What a little cow! She continues:-

"Oh and what am I left with? Nothing! Not a penny. Oh, I've got ideas and I've got energy. I've got my whole life in front of me. But I'm trapped for the want of a few thousand lousy quid and there's you. All that money and what do you do with it? Nothing! You don't even go on holidays, you don't buy clothes, you just sit on it!"

"Yes," says Rita quietly. "And that's what I'll carry on doing until the day I die. When it will go to a good cause and you, Madame, won't see a penny of it! But hang on if its only money you came back for I can't let you go empty handed can I?"

She rummages through her handbag for her chequebook.

"What are you doing?" asks Jenny.

"I'm writing you a cheque," says Rita. "Oh it's not as much as you would have liked but its enough to set you off somewhere else. Here take it." She thrusts the cheque at a seething Jenny. "I'm going to bed now when I get up in the morning you better still not be here!"

Closing shot: A close up of a cheque, made out to Jenny Bradley for £1000. For the anoraks out there - Rita banks at the Weatherfield branch of Barclay 's.

End Credits

Tammy Mitchell

Peter Lloyd - RICHARD SINNOTT Last appearance of Jenny Bradley - SALLY ANN MATTHEWS Craig Lee - KIERAN O'BRIEN George Panyatu - ANDREAS MARKOS (Burgermania! Owner)
Written by: MARK WADLOW Directed by: BRIAN MILLS

Friday (3605, Monday 11 October 1993)

Jenny's gone and Rita tells Mavis the real story, that Jenny was after her money and put her in mind of Alan, her father. But Rita warns Mavis that the story for public consumption is that Jenny was only visiting anyway and Rita is sorry to see her go. Mavis pledges her silence but like most wives tells her husband that night. Derek just waxes on enviously about Rita's money while trying to talk Mavis into letting him plant a small tree in front of the house.

Ken offers to speak to Maggy about Tracy but when he does, Maggy isn't very forthcoming and is resentful, thinking that Ken and Deirdre want her to spy on Tracy for them. It's not spying, Ken protests but confesses he wouldn't want Tracy to know he was talking to Maggy. Case closed and Maggy does the same, shuts Ken out, not wanting to lose her valued employee by betraying any confidences. Ken peevishly accuses her of only being concerned with her shop. (Uh. Yeah. Course she is. It's not as if she's harboring an underage runaway!) Later in the pub Ken fills Deirdre in and we get another dose of Deirdre in full Pity Party mode. *Yawn*

A surprise for Sally today when Joe turns up with his wife, Hazel when he drops Johnathan off. Seems he's away for a few days and Hazel will be doing the honours. Sally is intrigued. What can this mean? If they're getting back together it gets Joe off her back. She speculates to Gail. She speculates to Kevin. Gail is interested. Kevin is not.

The main thrust of the episode was the grand reopening of Alf's Mini Mart. Didn't even change the name I notice, even though he had to have a new sign painted. Traditions I suppose. Deirdre is back to work, albeit ruefully. Audrey is more concerned with opening and serving wine to all that enter (well, wine is probably too good a word for what Alf has bought. Then again, "plonk" is even too fancy a word for this ersatz paint stripper judging from the reaction of just about everyone that tries it, except Alf. I expect he's been drinking cheap wine for so many years, his palette is long since given up tasting for a living). Anyway. Vera catches Alf on a technicality and he has to admit she doesn't owe him anything as he didn't buy the debt on from Brendan Scott's estate. Alf has a grand opening photo taken by a Gazette paparazzo with a reluctant Deirdre in attendance and a crowd consisting of Sally and two small children. (Any takers on the odds of Deirdre materializing in the paper as "Audrey Roberts" and having Audrey's face wind it's way into a knot?) Audrey spends the day playing long suffering wife, making many sarcastic remarks at poor Alf's expense.

Vera tells Jack about the debt being gone and cackles that they could start a new one all over again as Alf will be retiring before long any road and they'll never have to pay! (Stupid woman. Why did she think they could make a go of the pub? Why did the producers ever think we viewers would think it was a good idea?) Bet sympathizes with Rita over the Jenny thing. Tanya notices a glint in Don's eye while he's sitting with Denise. Jack thinks she's way off base, Don's a married man (but Jack already knows Don and Ivy are sleeping separately!) but Tanya asks him how he would feel if it were him having a drink with the delectable Denise. Jack all but salivates. Case closed. Denise pays Don back another (the last?) installment against the money he lent her. Bet manages to offend Emily by wondering if she's defrocked the vicar she's had in tow. Just a friend? So, no defrocking, then? LOL!

Alf has spent most of the day, happy as Larry in his shop but the effects of the cheap alcohol and Audrey's demeaning barbs have taken it's toll. We know Alf is drunk because his hair is messed up, you notice it never usually is! Rita has finally found a minute to come over to congratulate Alf officially. Audrey has already decamped to the pub so they are alone at the end of the day. Rita remembers the last reopening when Alf proposed to her (1985). Wrong thing to say, as Alf finally vents his frustrations with Audrey to Rita, bemoaning his tenuous marriage and choice of bride. He should have married Rita, he slurs, leaning precariously close to Rita who backs away only to find she can't go anywhere due to the display shelf behind her. In fact, that's just what he'll do, Alf weaves, he'll leave Audrey and come live with her!!! YIKES!

Diane Johnston

Hazel Broughton FIONA MCARTHUR Joe Broughton JOHN WHEATLY Johnathan Broughton TOM LEWIS Maggie Redman JILL KERMAN
Written by PETER WHALLEY Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON


Originally transmitted: 13, 15, 18, 20 & 22 October 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 7 - Friday 11 August 2000
Episode Numbers: 3606 - 3610

Monday (3606, Wednesday 13 October 1993)

We open with Alf nursing a hangover from the grand opening of the shop. He drank more wine than the customers did! Mavis strolls in and asks mischievously, "is there no free wine and entertainment today, then?" "Eh, what was the entertainment?" Alf asks. "You were!" Mavis gleefully tells him. She informs him that he was completely pie-eyed, but then says that at least he's alive to regret it. "Je ne regret rien," Alf declares loudly, and then groans as his head hurts. "I regret everything," Deirdre says from behind the counter, referring to her visit to Tracy. "And I haven't even got a hangover."

At the café, Audrey is whining (as usual) about Alf and the shop. Alma and Gail are unsympathetic, prompting a frustrated Audrey to insist that Alf is the dreamer and she is the practical one. This cracks up both Gail and Alma. Audrey says the plan to retire in Lytham was a dream which proves her point, but nobody is buying it. She then claims that Alf bought the shop back because of her resistance to retiring in Lytham, and so she's actually responsible for the fact that he's a shopkeeper again. Again, she's met with skepticism.

Mavis returns to the Kabin and tells Rita and Derek about Alf's condition. Rita is interested in what Mavis might have heard about the conversation she had with Alf and asks a few subtle questions to find out. Mavis has nothing noteworthy to report, to Rita's relief. Mavis says she doesn't see the point of getting drunk when celebrating because you don't remember anything about it the next day. Derek comments that people generally do remember, but don't admit it. He goes on to say that he doesn't see what Alf has to celebrate since he's ended up exactly where he was before, demonstrating "the poverty of his imagination". Rita quickly changes the subject to tree planting, and Mavis and Derek witter on about what tree to plant in their front garden.

Percy arrives home and is surprised to find that Emily has a visitor - the vicar, Bernard. "You're getting your toe caps under table, aren't you." "Mr. Sugden developed his own special form of tact," Emily observes. Bernard says he was just passing by, and then scares Percy off by offering to discuss theology with him. Before Percy leaves, Emily suggests that he have an early tea since "Bernard will be around later for supper and I expect you'll be out since it's your legion night."

Alf steps into the Kabin to give Mavis her change that she'd left at the shop. When Rita sees him enter the shop, she quickly turns away and busies herself at the side of the counter with her back to him. She can't avoid him, though, as he makes a point of coming over to say "good morning". Upon receiving a "good morning" in return, he says, "you are still speaking to me, then." "Only if you're sober," Rita says. Alf begins to apologize, but Rita cuts him short, just wanting to forget the whole thing. Alf lets it drop, then awkwardly tells her that he'll put aside some of the ham she likes. He flees the shop. Mavis noticed the exchange between them and his discomfort, and wants to know what it's all about, but Rita tells her it was nothing and to let it go.

In the corner shop, Bet brings an item to the counter but Deirdre doesn't notice because she's too absorbed in arranging stock. "You're a mile away," Bet observes. Bet guesses that it's about Tracy and reminds Deirdre about what they were like as kids, making their mums tear their hair out. "And the encouraging thing is, we're all still here." Deirdre doesn't find that very helpful. Alf walks in and Bet teases him about the shop opening.

Hazel drops Jonathon at Sally's. Hazel says that she knows how Sally must see her, given that she walked out on her child. Sally says she doesn't understand it but isn't going to pass judgement. She then asks Hazel if she and Joe are back together. The answer is no. Hazel then tells Sally that Joe has got himself a girlfriend. Sally is pleased, thinking she's off the hook, until Hazel tells her what Joe has been saying. "It's past holding hands. He went up to the lake district with her on holiday, and he's obviously besotted with her." Sally's eyes bulge when she realizes Joe is talking about her.

Derek is watched by Sarah Lou as he plants a tree in the front garden. "Why are you spanking the tree?" Sarah Lou asks, as Derek pats down the earth with a gardening tool. "I'm not spanking it. This is a very good tree. It's a dwarf tree, in fact, can you keep a secret? This is a magic tree. You might even find treasure." Des overhears the entire conversation. He's outside, fixing his doorbell. "You didn't know I was an electrical genius, did you?" Des asks, as he demonstrates the results of his work. "And you didn't know I had a way with children," Derek responds. One of those innocent exchanges when neighbors learn a bit about each other.

In the Rovers, Deirdre , Denise, and Tanya moan about the meaning of life. Deirdre tells them about Tracy. Denise isn't as sympathetic as Deirdre would like, taking Bet's viewpoint by saying, "we were kids once". Deirdre nastily remarks that perhaps Denise doesn't understand because she hasn't had kids. Instead of telling her where to go, Denise says that she knows a fellow who told her that the way to catch a horse isn't by rushing after it, but by showing it the sugar lumps. Misery Deirdre says she's sick of doling out the sugar lumps and that Tracy's had it as far as she's concerned and can do what she likes. "She can damn well stew!"

Over tea after supper, Bernard and Emily discuss how her husband was killed (in a robbery), and how she sometimes feels rage and bitterness over the stupidity of it, given that there wasn't much money. Bernard says that perhaps we should call things like that stupidity, instead of evil, but Emily disagrees. Bernard admits that nothing evil has ever happened to him, except perhaps the bombing during the war, and then says a few things that seem to indicate that he feels he has not been an effective vicar. "What does it all add up to? Turning up at the expected time and place and saying the expected thing?" Emily insists that people need it and appreciate it, but Bernard seems to be undergoing a bit of a crisis. "Is it a crisis of faith or confidence?" Emily asks. Bernard isn't sure.

The Rovers closes for the evening. Bet, Jack, and Tanya share a drink together. Bet comments that she had a bar full of miseries that night which seems to have depressed her a bit. Tanya and Jack try to lift her spirits, but Bet doesn't want to know and says so, declaring that "we're all no hopers, the lot of us".

Having just left the pub, Rita is in a darkened and closed Kabin when there is a sharp knock at the door. It's Alf, who had also just left the pub and wants a quick word. He says that he knows Rita has been keeping out of his way all day. He apologizes again, and says, "there's no fool like an old fool, except when it's a drunken fool. I would never have said what I said last night unless I'd been drunk, so let's forget last night." Rita smiles and graciously agrees, but her smile fades when Alf says, "I'm sober tonight, and I meant every word."

Deirdre is at home drinking and moaning to Ken on the phone about Tracy. Nothing new is said.

Chez Webster, Kevin wants to know what's bothering Sally. He's convinced that she's thinking about his upcoming court case and apologizes for adding something else to her full plate. He says he doesn't know what he'd do if Sally went off him. Sally tells him to "stop talking daft" and they a hug and a kiss.

Ken raps on Deirdre's door, getting her out of bed. He's checking to see if she's alright. She invites him in. He tries to reassure her by pointing out that Tracy could be in worse circumstances, but she's still upset and sits on the bottom of the stairs, fighting tears. Ken reaches out and puts his hand on her shoulder. She covers his hand with hers and says, "I'm glad you've come". We are then shown a shot of the exterior of the front door. Through the small glass window in the middle of the door, we can vaguely see movement, perhaps Ken and Deirdre going upstairs? Slowly, the camera pulls away from the door and the credits roll.

Sarah Ettritch

Rev. Bernard Morton - ROLAND MACLEOD Hazel Broughton - FIONA MCARTHUR Sarah Louise Platt - LINSAY KING Johnathan Broughton - TOM LEWIS Rosie Webster - EMMA COLLINGE David Platt - THOMAS ORMSON
Written by - JULIAN ROACH Directed by - EUGENE FERGUSON

Tuesday (3607, Friday 15 October 1993)

It's the same evening as where the previous episode left off. Deirdre has made Ken a hot drink and they are talking in the living room. Ken tells her that things will work out, at least they know where Tracy is and who she's with. Ken reminds her that this is not always the case. Ken says they must just keep the lines of communication open. "Craig will soon get bored," says Ken. "There are no end of impressionable young girls in this town." Deirdre is angry. "Can't she see she's being used?" Deirdre can't bear to think of what's happening between Tracy and Craig. She just wants to go over there and drag Tracy back whether she wants to come or not. "And never see her again," says Ken. He tells Deirdre they have to wait and see what happens and give Tracy some space to spread her wings. "We have to trust her and let her fly." "And if she falls?" Deirdre is tearful. "Then we pick her up," responds Ken.

Outside a taxi draws up in the street. Don and Des are back from the night out. They are a little worse for wear and waxing philosophical as they walk down the street. Des notes how quiet it is with everyone tucked up in bed. Don remarks people need their sleep and that lack of sleep can make people act in an illogical manner. (He should know) Des wishes more people in Coronation Street would act in an illogical manner - it's too quiet. Des is reluctant to face his empty home after his night out. "At least you've got a wife you can curl up in bed with." Don grunts and says nothing. "All I've got over there is three days washing-up." "A lot of men would settle for that you know," says Don as they bid each other goodnight.

Back at number one Ken gets the whisky bottle out. Deirdre protests but not so's you'd notice. Ken senses that Deirdre isn't only upset about Tracy. He pours them each a drink. Deirdre tells him that she feels her life has been a failure. She feels bereaved with Tracy gone. And this type of thing has been happening all her life. She has nothing, she lost two husbands and now a daughter. Deirdre is in tears. She is very low. She can't see any future for herself except to be like Phyllis just popping in and out when people need her. Ken tries to reassure her that her future will be better than that. "You always did bounce back Ken, she says bitterly. "It's in your nature." "Is it?" Ken confesses to Deirdre the details of his near-suicide one New Year's Eve when he was very low and couldn't see a future for himself. It was only Bet coming round that stopped him from taking the whisky and pills at the very table where they are both now sitting. Deirdre is astonished. "I had no idea." He tells there is always something better coming round the corner. The first step is to like herself and things will get better. He promises to help her if she wants. "You already have." Ken tells her that no matter what's happened in the past he will always be there for her. He lets himself out of the house pauses and sighs before he heads up the darkened street.

Morning has broken and Kevin is playing silly beggers at the breakfast table. He is throwing pieces of breakfast cereal for Rosie to try and catch in her mouth. Sally is not impressed the Kevin has mistaken their daughter for a seal.(It might have been more impressive if Rosie had caught any of the cereal.) Sally is on edge and wants Kevin to get on with his breakfast and leave for work as she has to get the cereal off the carpet. He has taken the holiday snaps out to look at them and she snatches them up from the table to put them away. Kevin wonders if Hazel Broughton as said anything to Sally because she is so edgy. He thinks Hazel has criticized Sally's housekeeping skills. There is a knock at the door and after arguing back and forth about who will open it, Kevin says he will open the door and go to work. He tells her it doesn't matter what people think. Hazel comes into the hallway and puts Jonathan down. The little tyke runs into the living room and picks up the holiday photos from the sideboard. Hazel runs over to him and rescues the photos which, to Sally's relief, are still in the envelope. "Anywhere nice? asks Hazel. "Nowhere special," replies Sally. "Still, memories are special aren't they? says Hazel. Sally lets out a sigh as the door closes. Oh close shave, Sally!

Mavis opens the door to Sarah Louise. "Can Derek come out and play?" says Sarah-Lou hopping up and down. Derek is summoned. After making sure that she didn't cross the street by herself and that Gail knows where Sarah-Lou is Mavis invites her in. Sarah-Lou says she's come to tell them nothing has happened to the tree. "But you said it was magic." Derek tells her it is and they go to look at the tree. Sarah- Lou can't see any thing different but Derek gives her a trowel and tells her to dig in the ground. Sarah-Lou unearths some "buried treasure". She is delighted and shows Des who has happened to come out and witness this manifestation of magic. Maybe this is the illogical type behaviour he was wishing for last night. "Nice one Derek!" says Des. Mavis agrees and tells Derek that it was nice of him to bring magic into a little girl's life. Derek gives her a hug. "Well a not so little girl brought magic into my life and I thought I should pass it on." Awwww.

Gail is at Sally's house getting the latest on the Joe situation. (Which is why she let Sarah-Louise go over and see the Wiltons) Sally tells her my heart was in my mouth,if Hazel had seen just one photo she would've known straight away it was the Lake District. "There's even one photo of me, Joe and the kids!" Gail tells her she shouldn't have to put up with this and she'll have to have it out with Joe. They are interrupted by Sarah Lou who rushes in to show them the treasure that the fairies left under Derek's tree. (We can now see the treasure is a bag of chocolate gold coins) Sally tells Sarah Lou she can eat the treasure. "If I eat one will I turn into a fairy?" "Well if you do," says Sally, "I'll have one." (Aside to Gail) "A pair of wings might come in useful in the next few days!"

Ken is back at the flower shop. "What do you want?" asks Tracy in a guarded tone. "To see if you're OK." Ken has got his reasonable voice on. He apologizes for embarrassing Tracy at the flat. She tells him he wasn't half as embarrassing as Deirdre was. Tracy is reasonable today too. She tells Ken she understands how Deirdre is feeling but she needed to get away and have some space and not be hassled. "It will be good for her too," Tracy reasons. "It will make her realize that I won't be there for ever. It will make her get on and live her own life and stop trying to live mine." (Hmm maybe Tracy isn't a much of a kid as her mother thinks) Ken gets Tracy to agree to keep in touch and proposes they do this on neutral territory. She agrees, as long as it's just him and they make arrangements to meet for a meal.

Denise and Don are propping up the lunchtime bar. ". . .I always wanted to be a cowboy and ride free on the range." he is telling her. (Not a lumberjack then?) "You don't see cowboys any more do you," he muses. "What do you mean?" says Denise "I was married to one!" Denise prepares to go as she has seen little dogie Don is about to be corralled by Ivy. "Don't let me break up the happy home," Ivy says sarcastically but Denise puts her coat on hurriedly and leaves. Ivy remarks Don is allowed to buy her a drink. He orders an orange juice. Ivy asks Tanya to put a gin in it. Ivy is upset. Don has forgotten that today is Brian's birthday. He would have been thirty-five. Don's response to this information is minimal. "I might have expected that reaction from you!" Don tells her he thinks life is for the living. "Well some people have memories!" Ivy takes her drink and goes and sits in a booth. Don follows her and tells her that sitting in the pub on her own won't solve her problems. Ivy responds that she's on her own because he won't sit with her. Don throws up his hands and leaves nearly bumping into Emily and Bernard. "Lost your partner?" says Emily brightly "Maybe we can join you?" Ivy warns her, in near tears, she isn't very good company and when Emily enquires why the floodgates open. Bernard arrives with the drinks and is apprised of the situation. Tanya asks Bet what's going on and is not apprised of the situation. Ivy dries her eyes and makes to leave but when Bernard is introduced as a vicar Ivy cannot resist telling him she is a Catholic. When Bernard hears this he cannot resist being a vicar and invites Ivy to tell him all about Brian. Emily realizes resistance is futile.

Derek unexpectedly enters the Kabin at lunchtime. He tells Mavis that as he sat in the school boiler room with his sandwiches he realized with a little extra effort he could be in the Rovers enjoying the company of his wife and having one of Betty's hotpots. "Oh you old romantic," says Rita. She tells him she's surprised he didn't jump on his yard-broom and fly over. "Ah! You've heard about the magic we weave in our lives?" Derek is in an irrepressibly good mood. "I've heard about Sarah Louise. Is there anything else you should be telling me?" asks Rita with a nudgy-winky air. "Oh Rita!" Mavis is mildly shocked. "Well you never know with you two. It's a passionate man who rushes home for lunch with his wife when he already has sandwiches made by her own fair hand!" Rita asks Derek to put some magic in her life and send her off to the Seychelles or the Mountains of the Moon. Audrey enters the Kabin and hearing the last of the sentence, declares that's just want she wants, Mountains of the Moon. (Strangely I can't imagine that Audrey would know where the Mountains of Mourne are let alone the Mountains of the Moon. Does that mean . . surely not . . she's a Dead Head??) "You can go anywhere in your imagination, Audrey, anything's possible!" says Derek expansively waving his arms and skipping after Mavis. Audrey remarks she can never make those two out. They're either dragging their faces on the ground or skipping about like Jeanette MacDonald and Nelson Eddy! (Quick now, picture Derek in a Mountie uniform singing 'When I'm calling yooohooohooohooo!' Rita couldn't either.) Audrey wants to gossip about Deirdre's troubles with Tracy. She opines that Ken should be doing more to help. Rita replies that she is sure Ken is doing all he can and informs Audrey she's expecting a delivery soon. "So what is it you wanted?"

Joe arrives at Sally's to pick up Jonathan. Sally sends Jonathan to put his coat on. She has worked herself up for this confrontation. Joe can tell something is wrong. "Has Hazel been having a go at you?" "No, but she will if she finds out I've been to the Lake District for my holidays!" Joe feigns ignorance but Sally isn't having any. "Oh come on! You told her you were in love with another woman who you took to the Lakes on holiday!" Joe protests, "I can explain it's not what you think." Sally tells him she thought she had made her position perfectly clear, so he'd better explain and it had better be good.

In the Mini Mart Deirdre is giving Denise her change. Denise tells her it was a £20 note not ten. Deirdre looks in the till and apologies. "I don't know where my head is today." Denise thinks she looks a bit 'peaky' (ie not well) "Maybe I've got a bug." Denise advises a trip home to bed. "If only it were that simple," sighs Deirdre to Ken who caught the tail end of Denise's remarks. Ken reports on his meeting with Tracy. "There's been real progress." Deirdre jumps the gun. "She's coming home!" Ken dashes her hopes and explains that Tracy will him him on neutral ground once a week. "But not me, she must really hate me!" Ken tries to explain Tracy's position. "She's actually being very adult about it." "Pity I missed it!" says Deirdre sarcastically. Ken retorts that it is a pity and if Deirdre doesn't change her approach to the whole thing she is going to miss out altogether. Deirdre realizes he's serious. She apologizes and thanks Ken. "At least one of us has contact," she sighs.

Sally is waiting for Joe's explanation. "It's difficult . ." he starts. Sally jumps in. "It's difficult for me!" Joe tells her that he told his wife he was seeing another woman to save face. "What!" Sally is incredulous. Joe tells her he was humiliated by his wife's behaviour and he just wanted to show her he could get somebody else. "So you dragged me into it?" Joe says he didn't mention any names. Sally tells him he doesn't have to because when Hazel finds out she's been on holiday to the Lakes she'll put two and two together. Joe says she won't find out. "She'd better not!" Sally then asked Joe when Hazel would be leaving. It seems that she is not, at least for a while. Joe thinks Hazel is trying to get custody of Jonathan and in order not to give Hazel any grounds for custody his solicitor has told him to give her every opportunity to see Jonathan. "So she could be around for quite a time?" Joe affirms this. "I'm sorry. I can't risk losing Jonathan. You can see that can't you?" Sally can. Only too clearly.

Libby Seekings

Hazel Broughton FIONA McARTHUR Joe Broughton JOHN WHEATLEY Jonathan Broughton TOM LEWIS Rev Bernard Morton ROLAND MacLEOD
Written By KEN BLAKESON Directed By EUGENE FERGUSON

Wednesday (3608, Monday 18 October 1993)

Liz begins her day by opening up a thick envelope. It contains her divorce papers.

Sarah Louise is digging round Derek's tree looking for treasure. He tells her that although it is a magic tree, even they can't work everyday. Martin comes out of the house and calls for Sarah - time for school. She asks Derek if he will keep looking for treasure and he agrees. Nicky joins the carload and says that Derek is a daft as SL is if he thinks that magic trees exist.

Joe and Jonathan pull up outside the Websters'. They are late as little J had a bad night. He was restless and calling out for his mother. Joe wonders why she has had to come back into their lives now as they were getting as long all right without her. Sally says that she is his mother to which Joe responds with she should have thought of that before she left in the first place. He tells Sally thanks and he doesn't know what he'd do without her. Then, he says that if a custody case comes up, Mrs. Broughton will have a fight on her hands.

Derek has decided that his tree has shrunk and wants to take it back to the garden centre. Mavis points out that poor tree hasn't had a chance to get established in its new environment what with SL digging about its roots and Derek can't blame the garden centre for that.

At the cafe, Alma and Gail ponder on how they managed to end up in the places they are. Gail tells her about Derek and SL and that Derek has quite the way with little ones. He really has her believing in the magic tree. Alma said that she believed in those type of things when she was young, too. So why are they slapping barm cakes with butter then? They had to grow up and become fully paid members of the real world. But, Alma continues, there are those that still believe in magic trees. Her husband, for example, believes in the kind that grow money! Cue discussion on Mark and his new school. Alma is not convinced that the new school and its cost is worth it even though Mike is.

Garage - Jim and his tool are hard at it making loads of noise. Kevin goes off to get them a brew and the phone rings. Someone making an appointment for their car. He comes out of the office to find Liz standing there with the contents of her envelope. Asks him to explain it.

Kabin - Mavis asks Rita whether a tree can actually shrink. Rita says you can never tell seeing as it is a "magic" tree! They both decide that Derek has just let his imagination run riot and if the tree had shrunk, it would be the first Rita has ever heard of. She tells Mavis to put the kettle on and pops out to get some more chocolate digestives as they've run out "unless you fancy something else for a change - fairy cakes?" lol

Liz is some upset with her being branded as unreasonable behaviour on the papers.She didn't punch anyone, get banned from the Queens... He counters with well you walked out on n20 years of marriage and that boozer became more important to her than her whole family. She is mad because he didn't even tell her that the papers were coming. They rehash the same old arguments and she tells him that he knew how much getting the Queens mattered to her. He says no but he does now. Means more than everything else in the world to her. He asks her what kind of a wife would put more stock in a public house than her family. The kind that brought up 2 kids single handed while he played soldier. The kind that followed him around where and when he needed to go. Just when she finds something for her, he accuses her of unreasonable behaviour? He says that she didn't leave him with any choice. Liz tells him that he hasn't left her with any either.

Rovers - Don walks in for a pint on his day off. He notices Jim and Denise together. Denise is telling him about how nasty a divorce can get while Tanya is listening in. Jim says thank you to her for letting him talk with her and it has meant a lot to him. Denise goes back to work.

Cafe - Sally and crew are there for a tea. Gail notes that Sal is still involved with the Broughtons. She says yes but explains that Joe made up the girlfriend tale to maintain his dignity with his wife. Gail points out that this "mythical" girlfriend just happens to be the one he has declared his undying love for, the one he wants to be more than a childminder for him. Sally says she will sort it out - has to, for Jonathan's sake.

Kabin - Ken tells Rita that he and Tracy will meet up once a week but that she doesn't want Dierdre part of that for now. Mavis thinks it is disgraceful for Tracy to treat her mother like that. Ken doesn't defend her but says he is trying to see her point of view. Rita offers any help she can give should Dierdre need it as D is bound to think it is the end of the world right about now.

Queens- Andy tells Liz that no matter what she and jim think, he and Amy are getting married. Liz says he couldn't have picked a worse time but says when. he tells her that they will do it when she gets back from Trinidad. Liz tells him that if their minds are made up,there is no stopping them then. Andy wants her and Jim to go and meet Amy's family. She comments on how she and Jim are a shining example of marriage. That's not the point replies Andy. he just wants them to behave civilly for a few hours and she shows him the divorce papers.

Rovers - Tanya asks Des after Colin. She tells him that the "yearning" must run in the family. He says yes, his grandfather had a thing for barmaids and if she gets desperate. he'll give her his phone number. Alma and Mike are discussing Nicky and Mark. She thinks it is a shame that they don't get to spend as much time together as before as they got along well. He says yes but that was before mark had his eyes opened to the world beyond Weatherfield Comprehensive. Alma calls him a snob. He says he is just thinking of his son's future. Derek asks for a half and Des tells him he'll get it . It's the least he can do for a man that has brought so much happiness into a little girl's life. Derek then tells him about his shrinking tree. des has never heard of that and asks Jack if he has. "How the hell would I know?" comes the response lol Derek figures it has shrunk by 3 inches. Shrunk by 3 inches repeats Des. Nasty says Jack then "we are still talking about the conifers, I take it." <smirk> Des asks what Derek's thoughts are on it. He tells him about his efforts to reroot it. Des tells him he should measure it to make sure that it is shrinking as if it really is, Derek may have a gardening phenomenon on his hands.

McDonald's - Andy asks what jim thinks he is up to. Jim tells him he didn't want it this way. Andy tells him he could have at least tried to discuss it with her. Andy asks him if he realizes how she felt when the papers came through the letterbox. Jim says yes he does and has Andy considered how he felt when Liz slammed the door in his face after the night she spent there. All he needed was one word of encouragement and he would have swallowed his pride and turned a blind eye on everything that had happened. Jim says that he has taken everything a man could take. Andy says he should have said something to them or to Liz before he decided to serve the papers. Jim tells him to hold on and asks Andy who he talked to when he decided to pack up university and get married. Andy tells him that is nobody's business but his and Amy's. Jim counters with the divorce being nobody's business but his and Liz's. Off goes Andy.

Rovers - Don asks Denise if she ever tires of being a hairdresser. She laughs and says she is a psychiatrist, marriage counsellor, social worker... knows enough of the folk and their relationships to keep her in clover for the rest of her life. Don then asks her about a household - Denise dishes a little dirt but no specifics. Jim comes in for a hotpot. Des asks him for a game but he declines. Des then goes onto Tanya asking her if he has a health warning on his head "being seen with this man could be a danger to your health". She laughs and says she thought he was feeling lucky that night. Tells him he sill could be if he asked the right person. He asks if she has someone in mind. "ooh might have" Des then asks her how long they've known each other and that he never even realized. Realized what? That she could play darts. Oh, you daft bugger she says with a tap on his shoulder! Jim joins the Denise/Don thing and asks to make it a Jim/Denise conversation. They go to chat about the divorce. Des asks Don if he fancies a game and gets rebuffed yet again! Jim tries to say thank you to her for being there when he needed an ear to bend but Denise takes it all wrong. She tells him that she is not to blame for this and in the future, to leave her out of it. Tanya watched it all with amusement.

Judith Cooper

Written by BARRY HILL Directed by CHARLES LAUDER

Thursday (3609, Wednesday 20 October 1993)

Gail and Sarah Lou pass down the street. SL runs into the front garden of Number 4 to inspect the tree only to get bellowed at by Derek for her trouble. She goes running back to Mummy who gives Derek hell for scaring the child after starting the whole magic tree thing. Derek is more concerned with the tree to take any notice. He whips out his . . . measuring stick and proceeds to assess his conifer (it must be a male thing, this obsession over size of pointy ended things that grow ;) Derek is nearly beside himself at the discovery that the tree is three inches shorter than yesterday when he realized it was three inches shorter than it was the day before. Gail thinks he's lost his marbles.

In the Kabin, Mavis witters on about dark winter nights. Bet, sporting a fluffy blonde wig of Marilyn Monroe proportions that puts Rita's Big Red Wig firmly in the shade, teases Mavis a bit before Derek comes in, nearly bereft, to report the shrinkage. They all three have a go at Derek's expense. He stalks off, offended at their lack of compassion for his problem (suggestions that the tree doctor talk to it or that the fairies might be collecting the wood for bonfire night!) Bet tells Mavis not to fret, If the tree keeps on shrinking at it's current rate there'll be nowt left of it after a few weeks!

Hazel brings Jonathan to Sally's, cheerful that her son is finally showing more affection to his mother and his mother's boyfriend. She tries to get information out of Sally about Joe's new girlfriend but Sally is circumspect and only says Joe doesn't confide in her.

Bet and Tanya wait for Jack's excuse du jour for trying to skive off work. Jack reckons the cellar steps are getting steeper. Bet wonders if Jack just isn't getting smaller, like Derek's tree. And if he doesn't get back to work, he too will disappear before long. Jack takes the hint and slogs back down to the cellar. Tanya, she the keeper of all information that might be useful, tells Bet she overheard Jim telling Denise he's divorcing Liz and wonders if there's anything going on between Jim and Denise. Bet becomes quiet and doesn't encourage the speculation.

Alma and Gail fill ketchup and brown sauce bottles at a table in the café. Gail has just finished telling Alma about Derek upsetting SL. Alma is concerned for Mark who doesn't seem to have made any friends at his new school and has seemed to have lost his old friends. She says Mike doesn't seem to care or notice, only being concerned with the status of the private school and the contacts Mark will make for his future. Alma decides to stick her oar in as someone has to look out for the lad's feelings.

Percy and Mavis have a chat in the pub, Percy expounding on his disapproval of Emily's rather liberal vicar. Mavis launches into the story of Derek's shrinking conifer but ends up on the defensive when Percy casts aspersions on Derek's eyesight and addled brains. What did she expect? Jim enters to find Denise and they trade apologies for their dust up the night before. Denise admits Jim touched a nerve and warns him that it takes years to get over the upset of a divorce, long after you lose any feelings or animosity towards your ex. She charges Jim to think hard about why he's really doing this and what he really wants.

Meantime Bet is visiting Liz for a chat. Liz spills out her hurt, outrage and pain over Jim's actions, and his citing her "unreasonable behaviour". Bet advises her to get a solicitor so that her version of the truth will come out rather than just being a doormat and letting him walk over her. She does warn Liz not to hit below the belt as that helps nothing. Liz burns with the unfairness of it all. Bet thinks Liz better be absolutely sure she wants to fight back in court, cross petition or anything else because once the solicitors get hold of it, it's all hell breaking loose.

Derek builds a wind screen around his tree. Martin strides forth purposefully, to have a word about Derek's treatment of his little girl. Derek apologizes and explains his preoccupation. Martin, like most everyone else, thinks Derek's gone potty. Des arrives home and seemingly takes Derek quite seriously, offering his support and asking to be kept informed. (you DO see where all this is going, don't you?) I noticed Des's house is still for sale as well.

In the café, Nicky and some friends are laughing and making fun of a new maths teacher. Mark sits off by himself reading but when he tries to join in, it's evident the gap is widening between his old life and his new. Alma and Gail watch the proceedings with sympathy when the lads leave to go to the rec and when Mark rises to join them, Nicky doesn't notice and tosses a "bye Mark, seeya later" over his shoulder. (Now why doesn't Gail have a word with Nicky to include Mark more often?) Mike comes in and notices Mark's downcast look but Mark says everything is fine and accepts Mike's offer to take him and a few of his new friends out. Alma tries to get Mike to see that Mark just wouldn't admit there's a problem to his father but Mike of course is blind to it and thinks Alma is over reacting.

It's evening, and Don arrives at the pub, ostensibly looking for a fare that called for a cab (I have my doubts). Nobody answers the call, so he joins Denise who just happens to be at the bar. But she isn't stopping as she's shattered and heading for an early night so rather than have a drink of OJ anyway, Don leaves in a sulk. Jim arrives before Denise leaves and admits, as she suspected, that he doesn't know what he wants. Seeing Tanya lurk, Denise and Jim leave to go talk elsewhere, followed by Bet's observing eyes. Over across the bar Derek puts up with a sarky teasing comment from Jack and tells Mavis that he's going to sit up all night and watch from the window to see what's going on with his tree.

Andy is in a dark room talking about making plans for his and Amy's future while she's away for two weeks (Jamaica was it? Dominican republic?) He sits down and a voice comes out of the darkness and a shadowy figure snuggles up to him. I guess that's Amy. Very poor lighting. You can see Andy's face but not hers. The usual "Are you sure this is what you want" discussion is endured by your stalwart updater who's vcr Fast Forward Finger is itching.

Jim and Denise have gone to her flat and are drinking what looks to be red wine at the table. It doesn't have it's usual effects (must be a bad vintage year!) because Jim is awkwardly revealing his feelings for Liz, admitting he is probably just trying to punish her, hoping to shock her into coming back to him. Denise tells him she thinks he's playing a dangerous and stupid game if that's his reasoning behind the divorce petition. (watch the backfire any day now! )

I don't know how much watching Derek did as we next see him sleeping in a chair with the heavy drapes closed. He wakes, hearing a noise from outside and peeks through the curtains to see a shadowy figure digging up the tree and replanting a smaller one. I didn't get a good look at the man but it looked like Des to me, Derek's face looks reveals that he does know who it is, not surprisingly.

It's very late and Jim is heading home to bed. He thanks Denise for listening and she comes to the street entrance to see him out. He clasps her hand in thanks and she pecks him on the cheek. Don has arrived home and has seen this. He goes inside, and his face reflected in the light from the window in the door, reveals he's not pleased with what he assumes is going on across the road.

Diane Johnston

Hazel Broughton FIONA MCARTHUR Jason Firth ADAM WOODS Johnathan Broughton TOM LEWIS
Written by PETER WHALLEY Directed by EUGENE FERGUSON

Note: Amy Nelson was played by Melanie Brown (aka 'Scary Spice') in this episode but not credited. Louise Duprey's last appearance in this role was 1 October 1993.

Friday (3610, Friday 22 October 1993)

We start at the Wilton's; poor Derek is whinging about being the talk of the Street. He's horrified that everyone is laughing at 'Derek Wilton and his Magic Tree!" Ha, ha. He then starts complaining about Des and wonders just how much life would be better if they didn't live next door to him!

Joe drops off Jonathon. He has a moan about his ex-wife Hazel upsetting Jonathon's routine all the time. Sally agrees routines are important (i.e. spag hoops and hand washing rituals). Joe slags Hazel some more and says he 'll pick Jonathon up at 5:00.

In the café, Gail and Alma giggle over Derek's Magic Tree. Mike walks in and informs Alma he is taking Mark out that night so they won't be home for tea. Andy arrives and asks Alma if he can rent the upstairs flat for himself, Amy & Dominic. She agrees. A very depressed looking Don enters and is served a fortifying cup of tea.

In the Kabin, Derek is still lamenting being the butt of yet another joke. Rita makes a few snide comments; Denise enters and does the same. Derek sighs and leaves for work. He doesn't get far though; Jim enters and gets his two cents in as well. Jim also apologizes to Denise for boring her stupid with his marital problems and promises he will never mention his divorce to her again.

Back in the café Gail has a go at Alma telling her the flat is not at all suitable for three people, especially when one of those people is 5 years old and needs a back garden to play in!

Liz consults with her solicitor. She's received the petition from Jim and is NOT happy about the reasons he's cited for the grounds for the divorce. The solicitor advises her that if she wants the divorce to just accept the petition and he'll proceed - it will all be straight forward and save her time and money. Liz won't have that! She's not about to let Jim blacken her name (she wants that fun for herself). The solicitor reluctantly agrees to file a cross-petition but warns Liz that it could get costly and cause her a lot of unnecessary hurt.

Denise and Jim share a table at the Rovers. Forgetting his hours old promise to never mention the divorce again he immediately launches into a tirade about Liz filing the cross-petition. He's shocked that Liz is actually trying to make out that he is the guilty party in the marriage breakdown. Denise looks like she couldn't give a toss.

Derek arrives in the Rovers toting a gym bag and two tennis rackets. Mave wonders what's up with that. Derek cryptically advises her she'll have to wait and see. Mavis looks suitably concerned.

Don asks Denise for a word in private. He's calling in the loan and wants it all paying back now. Denise angrily tells him it will bankrupt her if she has to pay back £2500 in one go. Don doesn't care and wants it back ASAP.

Tracy & Ken meet up for lunch. She's quite happy to be having lunch with her Dad but wishes to avoid any mention of Deirdre.

Andy helps Amy's Mum (Cath) pack. Andy gives her a ring to give to Amy on the plane tomorrow. Cath teases Andy but she's really very impressed.

At No. 4 Derek eagerly awaits Des' arrival home from work. Des pulls up and Derek tells him to go immediately to his back yard - something strange has happened!

Hazel arrives to collect Jonathon but Sally refuses to let him leave with Hazel. She also tells Hazel off for causing so much instability with Jonathon. Hazel snaps back at Sally and tells her she KNOWS what's really going on.

In Des' backyard the aliens have landed - and left crop circles! Derek chortles with glee having 'got one' on Des. Des decides that he should call the police, after all it's really best to report alien activity, and that must be what it is as it couldn't be a hoax, could it? Derek admits that it was all his doing but Des refuses to believe that Derek could have orchestrated such a clever trick. Derek insists but Des decides he really should notify the police.

Joe has now arrived to collect Jonathon. He gets an earbashing from Sally for putting her in the middle of his and Hazel's problems and she advises him to just sort it out as quickly as possible.

Des 'calls the police' - rather he calls Jack and Don over to have a look out his back bedroom window. They have hysterics as Derek demonstrates the technique for creating the perfect crop circle! Des manages to compose himself to get a photo of Derek.

I'll elaborate here in case you wish to try this at home.

Materials: a long stick with a pointy end, string, 2 tennis rackets.

Method: Tie tennis rackets to your shoes (Canadians may wish to just substitute with snowshoes). Measure string to desired radius of crop circle, tie to stick. Shove pointy end of stick into ground, hold string taut and march in a circle, one foot in front of the other, tramping down all the grass until circle is visible in your lawn. For inner circle, wrap string around your hand once or twice, move in toward the stick and repeat.

Voila! Crop circle, amaze your friends!

Anyway, while Joe was picking up Jonathan, Hazel was lurking over the road at the Garage, waiting for Kevin to return from a call-out. Kev arrives back and Hazel tells him she's there to put Kevin in the picture - Sally and Joe are having an affair!

End credits

See you Thursday!

Tammy Mitchell

Richard Addlestone RON MEADOWS (Liz's Solicitor) Cath Nelson ALBIE PARSONS Hazel Broughton FIONA McARTHUR
Written by: PHIL WOODS Directed by: CHARLES LAUDER


Originally transmitted: 25, 27 & 29 October; 1 & 3 November 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 14 - Friday 18 August 2000
Episode Numbers: 3611 - 3615

Monday (3611, Monday 25 October 1993)

We open at the Websters. Kevin and Sally discuss Joe and Hazel while Rosie finishes her breakfast. Kev is bothered by Hazel's statement that Joe and Sally are having an affair, but rather than coming out and asking, he dances around the topic, asking all sorts of other questions. He wants to know if Jonathon is being dropped off, given the misunderstanding the day before. Sally says Joe has promised it won't happen again. Kevin wants to know if Joe will be dropping off Jonathon. Sally expects so, and then wonders why Kevin hasn't left to open the garage. Kevin ignores her, and asks what Sally thinks of Hazel. "She's balmy," is Sally's assessment. "She knows Joe takes Jonathon swimming on Fridays, but she turns up and swears blind that she knows nothing about it." (Hang on, if yesterday was Friday, why would Joe be dropping Jonathon off on Saturday? -- have I mixed something up??) Kevin suggests that it could in fact be Joe who isn't telling the truth and Hazel has it right. "I doubt it," says Sally. "And anyway, he's the one paying me the money so I'm bound to go along with his instructions, aren't I." "Yeah, I suppose you are," Kevin says, then sits at the table and begins to read the paper. "Thought I'd have another brew, unless I'm gonna be in your way," he says. Sally wonders what's gotten into him.

At the café, Gail is trying to convince Alma not to rent the flat to Andy. At that moment, Andy pops in all smiles. "Can we talk rent?" he asks. "I'm not sure how to put this," Alma begins, moving closer to Gail for support. "There's not a problem, is there?" a worried Andy asks. "It's something I said," Gail tells him,. "Alma's only too keen for you to have the flat. And I'd feel the same if it were just you and Amy. But are you sure it's the right place for a five year old?" "It's only got one bedroom," Alma adds. Upstairs flat, no garden, busy street, Gail reels off. She suggests that Andy try the housing association. He says he will and graciously leaves the café.

Derek is checking his tree. Des assures him that it's still all there. Derek is proud of himself over his alien joke. Des suggests they call it quits, but I can't help thinking that he might have something else up his sleeve.

Audrey pops into the Kabin to pick up a magazine and discusses Derek with Mavis. Derek comes in, tennis rackets in hand, and says Des isn't so bad once you get the measure of him. You just have to play him at his own game. "I had him believing he had a visitor from outer space," he gleefully tells Audrey, then dashes off to work.

Joe and Jonathon finally arrive, and Jonathon has brought Sally flowers. Kevin's faces shows that he doesn't believe the flowers are really meant to be from Jonathon, but from Joe. Sally removes Jonathon's coat and hat and sends him off to play with Rosie and David. Sally and Joe carry on a conversation about the flowers and swimming mix-up over Kevin's head. Sally asks Joe if he's sorted it, and Joe says he went to see Hazel but she's gone away for a few days. Kevin listens with interest. "It's obvious to me that she wanted to take Jonathon away without me knowing," Joe continues, "and that's not legal, at least I don't think it is." He's in the middle of telling Sally that a neighbor saw Hazel putting suitcases in her car when Kevin suddenly loses it, and shouts, "Look, we don't give a toss whether she's gone for a day, a week, or a flaming year. We've had it up to here with your problems. We don't want to hear them, understand!" Sally is astonished and says that's not quite true. Kevin ignores her and tells Joe that Sally has better things to do, like taking care of his son. Sally tries to put a diplomatic spin on Kevin's words by saying that Kevin means they're not in a position to advise Joe, but Kevin makes it clear that he didn't mean that at all. To Sally, Kevin says, "what Kevin's trying to say is that if he wants you to carry on looking after Jonathon, he better get his private life sorted out." "Understood, I'll see myself out," an upset Joe says, and quickly heads for the front door. After he's gone, Sally demands to know what it was all about. "He needed telling," Kevin explains. Sally says she can sort things out herself, then adds that she told him to get things sorted yesterday and that he even brought her flowers. She heads to the kitchen to put the flowers in water, leaving an angry and worried Kevin behind.

At Bettabuys, Ms. Fenwick is setting up a wine promotion. Curly is upset that he wasn't informed. Elaine says she thought they were encouraged to use initiative. "Subject to authorization," Curly reminds her. The ensuing discussion indicates that Curly is miffed that he wasn't consulted, though the wine promotion does make sense as wine hasn't been selling well lately.

At the garage, Kevin has finally made it to work. Jim asks Kevin if he saw "that woman", referring to Hazel, telling him that she was looking for him "last night". Kevin tells Jim that Sally is looking after her kid and that Hazel's causing a bit of a hassle, but doesn't want to go into it any further.

At the salon, Denise is giving Audrey a facial when Fiona informs her that a client has cancelled for that afternoon. Denise is clearly disappointed about the cancellation, and we get the impression that business isn't good. She discusses with Audrey how expensive it is to run the business. Audrey tells her how tight with money Alfie is, and Denise ears perk up when she hears that Alf bought the shop back for less than he sold it for. Perhaps she's found her answer to paying back Don?

Speak of the devil, Don is in the pub discussing horses with Tanya. Ivy wanders up to the bar. Don hastily departs, making sure Ivy knows he's off to the betting shop. He passes Audrey and Denise on his way out (they're on their way in), and blanks Denise when she greets him. Denise insists on buying Audrey a drink. Deirdre discusses Tracy with Emily. Same old, same old. Back to Audrey and Denise, Denise suggests that Audrey should consider taking up hairdressing again. Audrey says she's tempted but not seriously. "I am being serious," says Denise. "Are you offering me a job?" Audrey asks. "More than that. A partnership," Denise answers. For once, Audrey seems at a loss for words. Denise presses her for an answer. "You don't have to do anything. Look at it as an investment. If you put enough in, you'll have a say in the running of the business." Audrey wants to know how much she's looking for. £3000. Ouch. Audrey says she doesn't have that kind of money. "What about Alf?" Denise suggests, getting to the point. Apparently, Alf's money is tied up in a building society account. Denise says he might get a better return by putting it into the salon, but Audrey shakes her head and says it's not Alf's style, to be speculative with his money. Audrey tells a disappointed Denise that she's sorry, but no money will be coming from Alf.

Curly shows a Mrs. Rogers from head office around Bettabuys. Mrs. Rogers notices the wine promotion and goes over to have a closer look. She likes the idea and congratulates Curly on his initiative. He accepts the credit, but then Elaine shows up to restock and is surprised when Mrs. Rogers comments on the way she is "helping Mr. Watts with his wine promotion". Curly reluctantly admits that it was Elaine's idea. Mrs. Rogers praises her and Curly is forgotten.

Ivy arrives at the salon to have her hair done. Denise asks some questions about Don's finances by comparing their two businesses. Ivy feels uncomfortable with the subject and tells Denise that Don doesn't discuss his finances with her.

Kevin sees Joe arrive to pick up Jonathon and tells Jim that he's just nipping home. Before Kevin arrives, Joe and Sally discuss Kevin's outburst that morning. Sally puts it down to Kevin being protective and over-reacting to the situation. Joe rushes off with Jonathon when he hears the front door open. Kevin is so on edge that the sight of seeing Joe bolt makes him question Sally about why Joe ran off like a "frightened rabbit". Sally says she was explaining how Kevin was backing her up that morning, which sets Kevin off about how Sally means apologizing to Joe. Sally wants to know what's biting him and why he's home so early. A flustered Kevin says he came over to tell her he'd be home at 6. "The usual time?" a puzzled Sally asks. Kevin heads back to work, leaving Sally to wonder why he really came home.

Andy drops in to the café to let Alma and Gail know that he went to the housing association and has an appointment to see someone on Friday. He tells Gail that she was right and he hadn't really thought about it, and assures both of them that there are no hard feelings. Alma is relieved and offers to buy Gail a drink.

At the pub, Jim tells Martin that something is worrying Kevin. Des arrives with a framed photo of Derek with the tennis rackets attached to his feet, creating the alien evidence in his backyard. Everyone has a laugh, and Tanya displays the photo behind the bar. Ivy arrives and Don notices she's had her hair done. He asks her where. "Denise's," Ivy says, her tone indicating that it should be obvious. She tells Don that Denise said he should treat her next time. Ivy says she thinks Denise must have been hit with a big demand for tax because of the financial discussion they had, and also that the salon doesn't seem to be doing very well. She was the only one there in the middle of the day.

Deirdre and Emily are back having a drink. Emily says she has strict orders from Percy to be home at a certain time. She and Deirdre discuss swapping living situations. Deirdre can have Percy, and Emily can have an empty house. Both say they're tempted, as Deirdre is finding it hard adjusting to living alone. Kevin comes in. Martin asks how he is since Jim mentioned that something seems to be worrying him. Kevin confides in Martin what Hazel told him. Martin says not to worry, that Hazel if probably trying to get her own back because Sally wouldn't let her take Jonathon. Martin thinks Kevin should tell Sally what Hazel said. Derek arrives and greets Des with a smile. Everyone points to the photo behind the bar. Surprisingly, Derek takes it in stride, saying, "it's a pity it's framed or I could have signed it," and then insists on buying Des a drink. Des again says that they should call a truce, and tells Derek that he's going to go down to the garden center and get a replacement tree. Derek tells him not to bother, because the tree is now a "symbol of our mutual sense of humour and a living proof of our new found bond." Des smiles, but then turns to Jim with a look of feigned agony on his face. Derek hands Des his pint, then says, "oh my, there's a spider in your beer!" As Des picks out the fake spider, he says to Jim that he wishes he hadn't started the whole thing now. It looks like Derek might winning this round!

Chez Webster, Sally apologizes to Kevin, saying that he was right that morning. She says that Joe does go on and on about his problems. She thanks him for handling it and tells him she loves him. She asks Kevin if he's alright as he's clearly pre-occupied with something. She assumes it's the upcoming court case. Kevin goes along with her, saying, "yeah, that's what it is. The court case." The episode closes with a close-up of Kevin's confused and worried face.

Sarah Ettritch

Rosie Webster - EMMA COLLINGE Jonathon Broughton - SIMON RICHARDSON David Platt - THOMAS ORMSON Elaine Fenwick - PIPPA HINCHLEY Mrs. Rogers - JILL BENEDICT
Written by - PHIL WOOD Directed by - JEREMY SUMMERS

Tuesday (3612, Wednesday 27 October 1993)

Morning at the Websters' and Joe is on the doorstep. He apologies to Sally for being late but his car wouldn't start. Joe and Sally both act as if Joe has Jonathan with him but we don't actually seen Jonathan until they get inside. Without further ado and not even taking his coat off, the little lad settles down to his crayons at the table with Rosie. Jonathan is not his usual rambunctious and chatty self. Oh he's not himself at all - it's another child entirely. (Wonder what happened to Tom Lewis? Too much extemporization?) Sally asks Joe if he wants Kevin to look at his car but Joe declines. He is in a hurry and leaves. "Well that was short and sweet!" Sally remarks. Kev says it looks as if Joe has got the message (which Kev delivered so forcefully yesterday). Sally thought Kev could have been a bit more enthusiastic about looking at Joe's car. Kev says it was obvious that Joe didn't want him to touch it any more than he wanted to do it. He tells Sally that he is determined they are not going to row about Joe and in future everything will be on a business level. He leaves for work but as he steps out of the front door there is Joe wrestling with his starter. The car is going nowhere. Kev sighs, he can't walk away. "Open it up," he tells Joe.

Don drives up to his house and gets out of the taxi. He looks across the street and sees Denise putting a large orange home made sign in the salon window. "Half Price Offer". She sees him watching her and ducks away from the window.

Meanwhile Kevin has diagnosed starter motor problems and tells Joe he won't be able to drive to work. Kev calls over to Don who is just about to go in his house and asks if he wants to do some overtime. Joe says he'll get someone to pick up the car but Kevin offers to take care of it, for the regular price, no favours. Joe is grateful and goes to get Don's taxi.

At the Salon, Denise is looking glum and bored. There are no customers. Percy enters. He has seen the sign and ever one to save money, wants a half-price hair cut. Denise contains her enthusiasm as Percy removes his cap to reveal a bald head on top and very little on the back and sides. "You're what you call unisex aren't you?" Percy will try anything for a cheap haircut. As she's settling him in the chair he asks her for a pensioner's discount. "Sorry. Not at these prices. Half price is as low as I can go." Fiona enters. "Good evening" remarks Denise. Fiona pulls a face behind her back. Percy is not happy. There's a chap in Rosamund Street who charges less. "It's not as if there's much to cut." he argues. Denise tells him if he wants to pay peanuts he'd better go see a monkey. Percy leaves in his usual huff (which has been waiting outside for him). Fiona tells Denise that it wasn't fair to Percy as pensioners don't have much money. Denise rounds on her and says she is not running a charity. "And while we're talking about money I pay from nine o'clock not five past so you'd better get here on time." Oh dear,Denise is in a bad mood.

At Betterbuys, Curly is still smarting from Elaine's triumph with the wine tasting event yesterday. "Any more bright ideas, Ms Fenwick?" Elaine says she thinks they should have wine promotions more often. Curly remarks sarcastically that he's sure the staff want to be in fancy dress rather than be involved with the nitty gritty of real selling. Elaine informs him that they sold twice as much wine yesterday as they normally do. "How about the red wines of Spain next time?" "How about Mr. Holdsworth in a sombrero and red cape dispensing tapas?" Curly is still in sarcastic mode. Elaine is serious. "Don't take too long making your mind up because I've already faxed Mrs. Rogers and going by her reaction yesterday I'm sure she'll be favourable about the idea even if you're not!" Elaine walks away leaving Curly gobsmacked.

In another aisle, Steve scoots up on a shopping cart to where his brother is stacking shelves. Steve is on a threefold mission. Grocery shopping, delivering Andy's mail and imparting that a cross-petition for divorce arrived at the McDonald's this morning. The writers are kind enough to spare the viewers the scene of Jim throwing another wobbly by using this device to inform us of the arrival of Liz's cross petition. Andy supposes his father received this news in his usual calm and reasonable manner (not). "Didn't you hear the tremors?" Steve tells him that something akin to the San Andreas Fault has opened up in the living room. Furthermore Andy isn't helping matters by leaving and shacking up right now. "Well he should have been more understanding. No wonder his marriage is in such a mess." Steve tells him he also missed the lecture on the perils of falling in love. "It all ends in tears apparently. . " Andy tells Steve that Jim is not going to put him off marriage just because he made a mess of his own. He also doesn't need Steve's snide remarks. "If you're going to start getting at me as well sounds like I'm best off out of it." Andy walks away leaving Steve mystified and wondering what he said to provoke that outburst.

Jim and Kevin push Joe's car into the garage. Jim apologizes for being late and explains he has been talking to his solicitor because Liz has cross petitioned him. He tells Kevin that the petition makes him sound like a psychopath and his lawyer reckons it's going to get messy and expensive. Jim has trouble getting his head round it all. Kevin makes sympathetic noises. Jim wants to know whose car they've been pushing. He offers to work on the car but Kevin says he'll do it later. "Is everything OK between you and this Joe Broughton?" Kevin answers sharply "Why shouldn't it be?" and walks off. "Sorry I spoke." murmurs Jim.

Ken enters the corner shop in search of breakfast. He has been up late marking papers. He is in search of something special and waxes lyrical about fresh croissants, Normandy butter and blackcurrant jam. "If this was France . . " "But as it's Weatherfield" . . .Deirdre tells he Ken has to make do with a sliced toaster loaf. (He might have had a chance if Mr. Scott was still in charge but Alf would tell Ken there's no call for croissants round here) Ken tells Deirdre she is looking more cheerful today and also that he is going to meet Tracy for their weekly lunch. "Do you have any message for her?" Deirdre doubts Tracy would listen to any message she has to send. The she changes her mind as he gets to the door. "Ken, you could give her my love."

Don enters the cafe. He also is in search of something different. Hot chocolate. Gail is surprised until she remembers Don is on nights. (In England chocolate or cocoa is usually a bedtime drink) Don says night work plays havoc with his sleep. "Maybe you've got taxi lag?" suggests Gail. Fiona comes in and sits down near Percy. She does not look happy. "Has she bawled you out as well?" says Percy. Fiona tells Percy if she had her coffee break at the salon she would need a hammer to chip the ice off the top. "See! It's not just me!" Percy announces to everyone. He has obviously been having a moan about Denise before Fiona came in. "What the heck's up with that woman?" "I don't know, but it's driving me crackers," says Fiona. Don, who is sitting behind Percy and Fiona listens to their exchange with interest and a thoughtful look.

Over at the garage, Kevin begins work on Joe's car. He notices some papers on the dash and a photo sticking out from between them catches his eye. He takes a closer look. The photo is of Jonathan and Sally.

At another bar on the planet Ken takes the drinks and walks over to Tracy with them. Tracy is not impressed that it's cola. "I'm in pubs every night with Craig" she tells him. "You didn't say anything when I had a drink last week with my pizza." Ken tells her that was in a restaurant and this is a pub. Tracy thinks it's stupid. Ken agrees that English licensing laws are somewhat uncivilized - unlike Europe. (At the time of airing sixteen years olds could not legally drink in pubs but could legally drink beer or cider in a licensed restaurant. Don't know if it's changed any since.) Tracy tells Ken that Craig knows all about Europe. He's lived in a squat in Paris and he knows it really well. Ken perks up (he's really got a French thing going). "Really? How long did he live there?" "Three weeks." says Tracy. Ken's face falls. (How easily impressed are the young and besotted) Tracy further gives Ken the benefit of Craig's views on French food (way better than English which is all contaminated with chemicals) and it tastes better than English food. "Does it?" "Well Craig says it does. Anyway you like French food." Not wishing to put himself in the same camp as Craig, Ken tells her French food is OK - in moderation. And then in a complete volte face from his earlier position in the corner shop declares, "Give me good plain English cooking any day." (What a hypocrite! I almost thought he was going to add "not that foreign muck!") The hors d'oeuvres over, the main course of this scene is a serious conversation in which Ken tells Tracy how bitterly regretful Deirdre is of not being able to put things right between herself and Tracy. Ken tells her that Deirdre has accepted that Tracy has a right to live her life the way she wants to but that doesn't mean Deirdre doesn't miss her. "If she could just hear from you now and again and know your alright it would mean a lot." Tracy is thoughtful. "Anyway it's up to you. Just thought I'd let you know."

In the Rovers, Jim is still mulling over his marital situation. He tells Kevin it's weird how one just keeps merrily rolling along without realizing how many cracks there are in one's marriage. How you can so easily turn a blind eye and ignore them until it's too late. Kevin grunts. Jim says it's amazing how wives can keep their secrets from you. (Grunt) You think everything's in the garden's rosy and then . . . Kerboom! There are tell-tale signs of course, but he didn't go looking for them. If I hadn't ignored them maybe I wouldn't be it the mess I am now. (Food for thought, Kevin)

Across the room Don and Audrey are chatting. Audrey laughs and tells Don how he is talking to someone who very nearly became an 'En-trop- anneur' Don is puzzled. "Yes, Denise." Audrey burbles on. "She asked me to become a partner yesterday! Can't think why because I haven't exactly had any recent business experience. Unless you count keeping Alfie under control!" Don is interested to hear more. He wants to know the outcome. "That's why I said nearly." Audrey tells him if she did have any money to invest she'd put it in something a bit safer than a back-street hairdresser's. The penny drops. "Hey! that's maybe why she asked me. Maybe she's short of cash? Do you know owt about it?" Don denies knowledge. Audrey, following her usual modus operendi logic says if that's the case Denise would be better off asking a bloke. "There must be plenty round here happy to oblige!" Don looks a little sick.

At the salon Denise is still in a mood. They must have had a few customers because Fiona is sweeping up hair cuttings in a manner which does not cause Denise satisfaction. Fiona tackles her. She tells Denise what Percy was saying about her in the cafe. Denise relents. She apologizes and tells Fiona that things are not that wonderful but she shouldn't be taking it out on her. Fiona wonders if her job is on the line. Denise denies financial troubles and tells Fiona to finish the sweeping and then go to the cafe and buy them some 'sticky buns'. "I promise to behave," says Denise giving her the bun money. "And stop worrying, OK?"

Kevin has turned up at Martin's. Something is preying on his mind. He shows Martin the photo he found in Joe's car. "So?" Martin doesn't seem impressed. "Bit weird isn't it?" Carrying a photo of another man's wife." Martin dismisses it. "There must be an explanation. Think about it. If they were having an affair how would they go about it with you working over the road?" (Martin has obviously worked out the first rule of extra marital affairs. When you play away - play away.) Kevin wants to know why Hazel said what she did. Martin explains her behaviour as part of her plan to get Jonathan and sling as much mud on her husband as she can. Kevin is not convinced. That doesn't explain the photo in the car. "Well, there's one way to find out," says Martin "ask him."

In the cafe Nicky and pals are assaulting the game machine and generally disturbing the peace. Well, Percy's peace anyway. Gail explains it's half term and the kids have nowhere else to go. Percy tells her when he had half term he was out in the fresh air potato picking. "Not many potato fields round here now," says Gail. Fiona appears for her sticky buns which have now manifested as vanilla slices. Percy notes she's not stopping. "No, temperature's gone up a bit," says Fiona. "Oh? I might come and get my hair cut then." Percy makes to get up. "No, I don't think so," Fiona tells him. She wants to keep Denise sweet. The kids start kicking the machine again. "That's it! I'm going to read my book in the bus shelter, It'll more peaceful than in here!" Percy's huff awaits.

Joe arrives at the garage to pick up his car. He is writing the check when Kevin says "I noticed you've got a nice picture of Sally in your car." "What?" Joe is busy writing the cheque.(Or is he playing for time) "I couldn't help noticing. Nice picture of Sally and Jonathan. On top of the dashboard." "Oh, yes" Joe tells Kevin it's been there some time. It's for Joe's mother but he keeps forgetting to give it to her. She wanted a recent picture but he didn't have one of Jonathan on his own. Then, masterstroke, he tells Kevin funny he should mention the photo because there are some for him and Sally. "Did you see the others?" Joe is very cool. Kevin looks awkward. Joe finishes writing the cheque and then goes to his car and pulls out some photos of the Lake District holiday. "Sorry they're so late. I'd forgotten they were in there to be honest. I wondered what you were on about at first." Kevin looks relieved as he thumbs through the snaps. "Oh these are great! Thanks, Joe," he beams. Joe looks relieved too.

The phone is ringing at Deirdre's and she runs downstairs to answer it. "Tracy! How are you?" (Play it cool Deirdre!) Tracy says she's OK and is ringing about her red sweater. She might need it as it's getting cold at night. She doesn't want to come and get it - yet. And she doesn't want Deirdre to take it round. "Oh well I'll get it out and wash it for you so it's ready." Deirdre wants to talk more but Tracy says she has to go. She'll be in touch about the sweater. Deirdre puts the phone down and heaves a sigh of relief. Silence is broken!

In the Rovers Jack is putting up a poster for Madam Tzara fortune teller. The guys are sceptical - unless she can tell them what's going to win the 3.40 horse race. All Jack knows is that Stella Rigby had a fortune teller and now Bet's having one and it's for charity. Martin notes Kevin is looking happier. He tells Martin the photo was one of a set. One for his mother and some for him and Sally. Martin says he knew there was an explanation. "Good job I didn't smack him one," says Kevin. Denise arrives and passes between Don and Jim on her way through the bar. Jim notices Don looking after her. "She's a lovely lady so she is. She's kept me sane these past two weeks with all my problems." Jim lets Don know that if he didn't have to box clever with Liz he wouldn't mind nudge wink with Denise. "Do you mean you haven't?" Don realizes he has been mistaken. "Are you kidding? I wouldn't have a leg to stand on if Liz found out about anything like that. Nice idea but. . ."

Des has an idea he might get somewhere with Tanya. She strings him along for a while before slamming him with one of her killer put- downs.

Denise makes amends with Percy by offering him a half-price haircut with pensioner's discount on top. Denise apologizes and so does Percy. "I can be a bit forward at times. Can I tell the lads at the Legion about your offer?" "Like you said Percy, you can be a bit forward." Denise moves off. Don stops her. "If it's about that money," starts Denise. Don tells her it's all right. He has spoken with his accountant and he doesn't have to pay the money back until January. He will have sorted something out by then. "So I don't have to pay it back?" "No." Denise is relieved. Slightly mystified, but relieved. She asks Don for more information but he is slightly evasive. He is more interested in taking her out for a meal. "To make up for messing you about." Denise agrees and Don leaves for work. Denise is still thinking about this new development when Fiona comes up and asks her if she squared things with Percy. "I should say so," replies Denise with an edge in her voice. "Generous offer, no strings attached." "No strings?" says Fiona. "How could there be strings?" "Very easily with some folk love, very easily." It's beginning to dawn on Denise that Don is playing a very strange game.

Libby Seekings

Joe Broughton JOHN WHEATLEY Jonathan Broughton SIMON RICHARDSON Elaine Fenwick PIPPA HINCHLEY
Written By MARTIN ALLEN Directed By JEREMY SUMMERS

Wednesday (3613, Friday 29 October 1993)

Three small boys are begging for spare change, sitting pretty much on Sally's doorstep to catch the trade going in and out of the corner shop. They even bagged a sucker on his way to the pillar box. I realize by the end of the episode this has something to do with a Bonfire Night tradition though I have no idea why. Ken passes by and promises some coin on his way back out of the shop. Across the road Don has arrived home and noticing the Salon sign out on the pavement, hot foots it (well, as much as he can) across the road to confirm his dinner arrangements with Denise. He insists he doesn't care if people talk seeing them out on the town together because he's a free man and can do what he wants. Oddly she doesn't find this strange and they fix a time. Denise fends off some stick from Fiona after he goes.

In the corner shop, Ken and Deirdre are talking about Tracy, Deirdre with a smile on her face after recent developments for a change. Percy comes in on the tail end of a bellow at the begging children and continues on a rant about teaching children to beg in the streets. Ken changes a coin on the sly as he intends to keep his promise.

Andy asks Ivy about a subdivision. Ivy has not one good word to say about the run down dirty crime ridden estate but when she finds out Andy was thinking of getting a flat there, she tries to backtrack. Perhaps it's changed. Andy appreciates her honesty though.

Kevin pops home to tell Sally he'll be working a bit later than usual and can he bring Jim home for tea since he's working too and Kevin feels a bit sorry for him. Sally returns to supervising the tea party that the kiddies are having.

In the pub, Tanya and Steve chat about Victoria coming home tomorrow. Tanya insinuates Steve's only interested in Victoria for her money but Steve can hold his own. (lucky job too, I don't think Tanya would be interested in holding his own for him, he's a bit wet behind the ears for her!) Mavis and Deirdre discuss the fortune teller who's going to be appearing at the pub. Mavis is unsure whether such things further the cause of women seeing as women seem to be the most susceptible to that sort of thing. Deirdre agrees but it doesn't half buck you up to be told that a tall dark stranger is going to be romancing you! Andy arrives after viewing a flat, unsuccessfully by the sounds of it. It must have been in that awful estate because he mentions rats and cockroaches to Steve.

Jim and Denise arrive in the Kabin at the same time, Jim high on his soapbox about divorce and expounding on it to Denise and Mavis, apprising them of Liz's cross petition. He bangs on about magazines that should be about divorce instead of weddings, egged on by Denise, and flustering poor Mavis who doesn't seem to know where to put herself! He finally leaves and Mavis, making matters worse, opines that she can't think of anything worse than getting divorced. Denise looks chagrinned and comments pointedly, How about two divorces? Mavis visibly wilts and weakly moans Ohh-hh-hhhhhhhhh! And changes the subject to the paper bill.

Emily offers to make toffee for Gail's kids who are going to an early Halloween party tonight. Andy sheepishly asks about the flat again as he's getting desperate (having only seen one flat and still has a whole week before Amy returns!) Alma wants to clean it up first.

Joe comes to get Johnathan and tells Sally he's just found out what Hazel told Kevin. Of course, Sally had no idea that Hazel did this much less tell Kevin a week ago! He offers to speak to Kevin but she thinks that will only make matters worse. She wonders if Hazel was lying to Joe and never told Kevin at all. She thinks Kevin would have surely mentioned it. They discuss Hazel's motives and Joe slyly wonders if Kevin believes her or just not made up his mind. He's good at insinuations and planting seeds of discontent, isn't he? She hurries Joe out the door just in case Kevin's watching and timing them.

Des encounters Nicky and the little ones in costume and hands over a few coins. Don arrives in the twilight to pick up Denise. He's in a snappy suit and tie! Nicky and the kids knock on Number 3 as prearranged but are sent running by Percy who comes out and reacts badly to Nicky's "Trick or Treat!" Not recognizing the Platts, he bellows and hollers and the three of them go running home where Gail and Martin are relaxing and enjoying the peace and quiet. It's not lasting long when the kids come in, the little ones crying and Nicky shouting the odds about Old Sugden. After determining that Nicky wasn't rude or instigating, Martin decides he's going to tell Percy what's what. Across the road he goes and confronts Percy. Percy is unrepentant, spouting of a lecture on ungrateful spoiled children begging in the streets. Emily adds her voice to the scolding, including her standard "Misss-ter SUGden!!!" but he refuses to apologize.

Kevin arrives home and Sally is about to bring up the subject of Hazel's accusations when Jim arrives freshly washed and laundered for his tea.

This evening in the pub, Curly is boring for England, whinging on about Elaine Fenwick's pushy and manipulative ways to Des. Des tries to break the routine by flirting with Tanya but keeps getting put down firmly. Alma joins them, followed shortly by Ivy. Ivy doesn't help Curly's case because she thinks it is a nice change to have a woman for a boss. Ivy notices the sign advertising the fortune teller and all but genuflects and waves the hand sign against the evil eye in her disapproval over messing with the devil. (who was it was going to seances not a few years ago hoping to contact Brian and Bert???) When Reg bounces in, poor Des feels outnumbered by Bettabuys staff but Curly corners Reg and adds to his campaign to get rid of Elaine, asking Reg if he can do owt. Reg jokes that he could either put a contract hit out on her or transfer her. Either will do! But whatever Reg can do, Curly would be pleased to be shut of her. Des tries it on one more time but Tanya tells him she's paid to smile at the punters, sorry if he got the wrong idea.

Back at the Websters, the adults chat thought Sally is a bit quiet.

Don and Denise are eating and Denise offers to pay or at least go halves. Don insists so Denise says it will be her turn next time. Don visibly brightens at the prospect of another date with Denise but his smile freezes when she says she is so glad she has a friend she can go out with, without worrying about fending him off at the end of the evening. Just in case he didn't get the message, she comments, that it's nice to have a meal out with a pal with no strings attached.

Oh, Vicky's come back a bit early and snogging Steve in the front hall when Jim arrives back home. He comments on how content a family the Websters are.

Oh? Ya think? Sally has already asked Kevin about Hazel and he admits that he's known a week and says he didn't believe it. Sally is increasingly upset and swears on Rosie's life it isn't true. He admits he had initial doubts, just a bit. She sobs that she'll stop minding Johnathan if that's what he wants which he doesn't, getting into a hissy fit because she won't let it go and stalks out of the room to close the subject but Sally's at the table in tears.

Diane Johnston

Written by PETER WHALLEY Directed by JEREMY SUMMERS

Thursday (3614, Monday 1 November 1993)

Friday (3615, Wednesday 3 November 1993)

Ivy scolds four cheeky lads for setting off fireworks in the street but Vera's the one that takes them by the ear and rousts them away. Vera asks Ivy to sit tonight so she can try out this lucky streak Maud promised her. Ivy, highly skeptical of such goings on, is in too much of a hurry to get to work. Vera offers Steve the chance to babysit with Victoria but Steve is taking Vicky out tonight. As a last resort Vera runs across the road when Gail calls out a greeting.

Inside Number 11, Steve drops the post on the table. It's Liz's birthday and there are cards from various family members who don't seem to have been told that Liz is living elsewhere now. Steve and Andy bicker about gift choices for her and Jim just looks like he's been kicked in the gut and doesn't know what to do about it.

In the backroom of the pub, Betty serves up tea. Bet is still in her night clobber but Raquel struts in, in full model poise and grace with a practiced smile on her face. Everyone is astonished when Raquel only wants hot water and not tea, to save the stain on her teeth.

Curly looks his usual befuddled self. He's defending the fortune telling as a bit of a laugh, contrary to Ivy's dark warnings and skepticism about Maud's abilities. Curly says he took no notice but why does he seem to believe that he already knows the woman he'll marry as Maud predicted? (Well, he does as it happens, but Maud was only trying to push him at her Maureen!) Elaine summons curly on business but Ivy's eyes widen as Curly looks back toward Elaine's retreating back, calculating (Is she 'THE ONE', he is thinking).

Bet and Raquel discuss Raquel's course and next career move. She's only planning to stay at the Rovers temporarily and will be getting calls for modeling jobs from the artistic director of the course as clients get in touch with him. She decided to take his advice and come home to Weatherfield and wait as she was told that because she's a poised graduate, she might intimidate the new (suckers) recruits on the next course starting up. The more Bet hears about Raquel's sojourn, the extra money she's spent and the things she's being told, the more her face hardens but she tries to put on a positive outlook for Raquel's sake.

Andy is at town hall making an appointment with the registrar for a marriage ceremony in a few weeks' time. He's told of several requirements, a £17 fee and presentation of their birth certificates on the day and it looks like Andrew Richard MacDonald is all set to become Mr. MacDonald once Amy returns. (Now, hands up who hears the Voice of Doom here? University quit, flat secured and wedding arranged? Something tells me it's all going to end in tears!)

In the pub, Raquel is decoratively perched on a barstool telling Betty about all the extra courses she took. Does her voice sound different? (no, but her brain sounds softer!) Tanya is beginning to show distinct signs of chafing from being rubbed the wrong way by Raquel and her vacuous, shallow attitude and feeling not a little insecure that Raquel is in thick with Bet and invading "her" territory. Raquel unknowingly seals her own fate when she glibly tells Jim and Des she's not working, she's a paying guest and to ask the barmaid for their drinks "She's doing nowt".

Sally's feeding the kids beans. Kevin drops in though he's already eaten at the café. This elicits sarcastic accusations from Sally about him checking up on her. He apologizes again but she's still angry that he believed the initial accusations about an affair with Joe. He's got to do a lot more than say he's sorry to make up for this!

Andy is sorting his paperwork and takes a call from Auntie Eileen who wanted to wish Liz a happy birthday. Andy avoids telling his aunt the real reason Liz isn't there and then hands the phone over to Steve. (must be from Jim's side of the family as we were told they still don't know of the breakup) Andy puts his papers away except for the appointment card for the marriage which Steve promptly finds and it's immediately obvious he doesn't approve, more because of the secrecy involved as Andy isn't going to tell his parents. Andy does ask Steve to be best man seeing as he knows now anyway but Steve just huffs derisively. No, then?

Tanya deliberately makes a noise to mess up the greeting Raquel is recording on the new answering machine she's bought on behalf of the rovers staff or anyone requesting the services of "Raquel and Nadia Wolstenhulme". Bet and Betty observe incredulously and decide to humour her although Betty snorts that "request the services of. .." makes it sound like a knocking shop! (Did I ever jump at that.. can you actually say that on tv? LOL! Translation: Knocking shop is the equivalent to a house of "ill repute") Across the bar, Des and Jim have a laugh with Tanya and Ivy has turned Vera down for babysitting as she promised to go to Bingo herself with a work mate. Deirdre overhears and volunteers her services but just then Vera hoots and jumps about. She's been scratching a charity lottery ticket that the bar is selling on behalf of the Weatherfield Hospice and has won £200!!!! Turns out she has to go into town to get the payout and an argument erupts because although Vera asked Ivy to get the ticket for her, Ivy paid for it as it was her round at the time. They exit bickering over who owns the tickets. Out back, Raquel is listening intently to her latest attempt at a message only to hear it's been spoiled by Vera's crowing "I've Won! I've Won!"

Andy's bought Liz a fountain pen and Steve and Vicky have got a voucher for a facial and massage. Liz is very pleased with both gifts and it's kisses and thanks all around although we can see Steve giving Andy the evil eye behind her back, especially when Andy lies about why he needs his birth certificate. The Queen's barman comes in with a bottle of wine as his gift and a toast is drunk to the birthday girl.

Raquel waits for the answering machine to pick up the ringing phone which it doesn't seem to be doing so Bet takes the call. (Stella Rigby) Tanya seems a bit insecure about her job security but manages to embarrass Raquel a bit by quizzing her on modeling jobs and if she has a bloke. She lies and says she does and then brags that she and Des were an item but she broke it off as he was getting overbearing. He's still sniffing round her though. They go off in different directions, leaving Bet to watch them both as if she knows she's going to have to prepare for a showdown in Dodge City.

At Bettabuys, Elaine helps a customer and is disconcerted to see Curly smiling at her. Geez all he'd have to do is twitch a little - I've seen that exact same "come hither" smirk on Reg Holdsworth!

Vicky has picked up on the tension between Steve and Andy but Steve is insistent that he can't reveal the secret . . . for all of about 45 seconds and he caves. She's delighted at the romance of a secret elopement but Steve is outraged and they begin to argue until Bet interrupts them, knackered at closing time. She must be, because she allows them for once to go to her room to continue their discussion so she can put her feet up but just then Raquel comes in, attacking the answering machine with a screwdriver in an attempt to fix it. Shortly after that Maud wheels in to have a private word with Bet.

We're in the café now and Vera and Ivy have sorted out their differences and are all smiles. They've split the lottery win and are happily telling Gail and Alma all about it and the fortune teller prophecy come true. Alma has some of those tickets to sell as well so Vera pays for a handful and promises to share with Ivy if they win. Just then Andy arrives, arms full of paint and buckets, to go through up to the flat because it's faster through the café rather than make endless trips. (eh? Can't he walk 10 more feet around the corner and go up them stairs just as easily in one trip as walk up the stairs from the café?) All this is designed so that Ivy will discover that he and Amy are moving in together without the sanctity of marriage, apparently and she goes off all moral right on cue until Vera redirects her attention to the lottery tickets.

Maud has a proposition for Bet. Citing the successes of Bet's and Vera's fortune coming true, and admitting that although she's "pulled some flankers in the past" telling dodgy fortunes, she even surprised herself this time, she wants to set up a table in the bar. She'll make a few bob and Bet will benefit from increased trade. Bet isn't licensed for that sort of thing, sub-letting trade (only if it's a charity entertainment thing, I guess then it's ok) but Maud manages to talk her round, against her better judgement. She can always use the "potty old woman" excuse if there's any trouble.

Kevin watches football and notices that Sally is skulking and sulking around the house behind him, glaring at him whenever she passes the door.

Next scene we are in the bar and Maud is all set up and head encased in a kerchief. She has two punters across the table who are probably egged on as Vera has just stopped by to thank Maud for her fortuitous fortune! Bet looks across from the bar, but still obviously has her doubts. Reg is curious to see Maud there but when he tries to find out if Maureen will be arriving later to pick her up, is only given an ear bashing for his trouble. Raquel invites Des to the Queens to buy Liz a birthday drink but he tells her he's got something else on. That something else swans in through the door, in full makeup and fancy hair do. Tanya! Guess she finally decided to accept one of Des's many invitations now that she can take Des away from Raquel right from under her nose. And you know that's the only reason she's doing it judging from the look she gives Raquel over her shoulder on the way out.

Steve and Andy have another row on the street about Andy's plans, getting married behind his parents' back especially so soon after the breakup of Liz and Jim's marriage. Steve refuses to be best man on top of all that aggro, ask someone who *wants* to be there !

Diane Johnston

Bob Cairns STEVE HALLIWELL Registrar CAROL COPELAND
Written by PAUL ABBOTT Directed by BRIAN MILLS


Originally transmitted: 5, 8, 10, 12 & 15 November 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 21 - Friday 25 August 2000
Episode Numbers: 3616 - 3620

Monday (3616, Friday 5 November 1993)

A picture of domestic bliss - breakfast at the Duckworths. Jack pulls the newspaper from the front door mail slot, while Vera tells Tommy that she's going to take him shopping for some winter clothes. Jack comments that no sooner does Vera win a few bob than she has to get shut of it. Now, if the money was given to him... He tries to convince Vera that betting on four horses of his choosing will turn hundreds of pounds into thousands. Vera has a look at Jack's picks in the newspaper and declares that she won't back horses whose names she can't pronounce (they're Arabic). Hang on -- she spots a horse she is willing to back -- "Tommy's Rattle". Jack tells her that at 33 to 1, it has as much chance of getting round the course as he does. He pitches his picks again, but Vera is determined to back "Tommy's Rattle", and plans to give Don the money to place the bet because she doesn't trust Jack to do it.

Martin and David leave the Platt house, only to have an encounter with a frightening monster -- Sarah Lou with a box on her head, peering through some eyeholes that have been cut into the side, along with a mouth. She and Nicky have collected some boxes from the printer for that night's planned bonfire in the Platts' back garden. Mavis apparently contributed the artistic touch to Sarah Lou's box. Martin cautions Nicky that they don't want too big a bonfire or they could set fire to the place.

Ivy pays Vera a visit and coos over Tommy. Ivy's washing machine has broken and she's hoping that Vera will be around for the repairman, but Vera is on her way out to do the shopping she told Tommy about. Vera asks Ivy to give Don £10 for "Tommy's Rattle", so he can place a bet at the bookies. Ivy is predictably shocked that Vera is going to risk £10 on a horse. She doesn't take the money, saying that she doesn't know when she'll see Don next and there's no way she's going to the bookies. Vera has no choice -- she'll have to trust Jack to do it.

At the Rovers, Tanya and Raquel have a tiff. Tanya has been using Raquel's hand cream. According to Raquel, the cream is specially formulated for people who model their hands. Tanya claims it's the same stuff she gets from the discount drugstore. Raquel retorts that it cost her 30 quid and Tanya should keep her hands off it. Her voice level and tone attract Bet's attention. Bet breaks up the argument and tells Raquel that in future, if she wants to tear a strip of someone she's to do it in private. Raquel storms into the back. Tanya looks very smug and comments that Raquel is getting above herself. Bet wasn't born yesterday, and accuses Tanya of purposefully using the cream because she knew it was Raquel's. Tanya snickers, thinking that Bet is on her side, but Bet tells her firmly not to do it again. "Watch it lady," Bet warns, "because neither one of you is indispensable." Vera pops in, Tommy in arms, and gives Jack the tenner for "Tommy's Rattle". Jacks asks her for the 10% betting tax, and guesses that she's only letting him do it because she couldn't find anyone else. On her way out, Vera reminds Jack that she'll know if he doesn't do it from Des Barnes.

At Bettabuys, Andy watches Curly and Elaine have a conversation while he musters up courage to approach them. He asks for a particular day off for both he and Miss Nelson (their planned wedding day, unbeknownst to both Curly and Miss Fenwick). Curly sarcastically responds that one more day for Miss Nelson in addition to the unexpected 3 weeks that she's already taken shouldn't be a problem. "So that's okay then," Andy says hopefully. "No, Andy, it's not!" Curly shouts. He wants to know why Andy wants the day off, but Andy refuses to tell him. "In that case, you can't have it," is Curly's decision. Andy points out that he could have just phoned in ill on the day he wants off, but chose to ask. An unsympathetic and unimpressed Curly reminds Andy that there are plenty of people who would love to replace him and Amy, so if they take the day off, they can collect their cards. A dejected Andy slinks off. Elaine thinks Curly was a bit harsh, but Curly is worried that if Andy has his way, then all the workers will follow suit. He does say that if he knew the reason for Andy's request, he might change his mind.

Jack fills in his betting slip at the bookies. Des is surprised at his choice of horse. A disgusted Jack says it's Vera's choice. He makes sure that Des specifies 33 to 1 odds on the slip.

Percy has made soup for Emily, and insists on clearing away her dish as soon as she finishes it, not liking "debris" on the table. He asks Emily if she enjoyed the soup, and upon receiving a positive response, says that it's nice to feel appreciated. Emily remarks that appreciation is something one must earn. Percy feels rebuked and concludes that Emily's mood is down to the fact that she's not happy with certain aspects of her life. Emily retorts that she's happy with all aspects of her life, as long as they don't include him. Percy is taken aback. Emily points out that recently he's been very mean to the Platt children, and when she mentioned that Bernard might be coming round for his tea that day, he was sarcastic in the extreme. On a roll, she says that Percy has always been a difficult man, but he's getting worse. Now, he's a "selfish, mean, and petty old man, and if it continues, I'll have to ask myself if I really want to share my house with you anymore." She abruptly leaves the table and the room, leaving a stunned Percy behind.

Jack and Des watch "Tommy's Rattle" race. Vera's chosen horse doesn't start well, and Jack laments that he should have put the money elsewhere. Suddenly, "Tommy's Rattle" pulls out in front, and with Jack shouting encouragement to the TV, wins the race! "33 to 1, 330 quid!" exclaims a thrilled Jack. "50 to 1," Des corrects him, saying that the odds had changed. But Jack will only be getting 330 because he insisted that Des mark the odds when he placed the bet. Jack complains that all the money goes to Vera. Des suggests buttering her up for a few bob, but Jack has a "better idea" and puts 55 quid on his hunch. "It can't fail," he assures Des, but Des' eyes close -- he can hear Vera yelling already.

Attempting to be pleasant, Percy has baked a treat (I never did quite catch what it's called... some type of bread) and asks Bernard if he would like to sample it. Bernard eagerly accepts a piece and approves. Percy asks Emily if she'd like some. She says she'll have a piece of Bernard's, who tears off a piece and feeds it to Emily, a sight that causes Percy to turn away. Emily observes that Percy has baked a large quantity. Percy says he's going to take it across the road to the Platts for the children to try, and plans to surprise them with it at their bonfire. Emily's outburst seems to have had its effect.

At the bookies, Jack is watching his race and his horse wins, netting him 165 quid!

Elaine informs Curly that she has found people to cover for both Andy and Amy on their requested day off. Curly says she's wasted her time. Elaine tries to convince him to give them their day off, but he won't listen, until she subtly suggests that perhaps Amy is pregnant ("I assume they're on intimate terms") and they have an appointment to see someone. At this possibility, Curly quickly changes his tune and decides they can have the time. Vera and Tommy wander into the aisle. Ivy spots them and admits to Vera that Don did come home before dinner and she asked him to put £1 on "Tommy's Rattle" for her. She apologizes to Vera because the horse won, assuming that Vera has missed out. Instead, Vera is over the moon, telling Ivy that Jack placed the bet for her. The problem is that Ivy tells her the odds were 50 to 1. "I've won 500 quid!" Vera laughs ecstatically. Hmm... will Jack have to give up his winnings to make up the difference?

Preparations for the Platt bonfire party are underway at the café. Raquel, Sally, and Gail are slicing, dicing, and cooking. Raquel inquires whether Joe is coming to the party, referring to him as the "good looking fella". After hearing that he won't be, she says that she was planning to chat him up and doesn't know how Sally manages to keep her hands off him. Gail and Sally exchange glances. Kevin, Martin, and the kids arrive with their Guy Fawkes. Uh-oh! It looks like one of the residents of the street -- Percy Sugden!

A very happy Jack arrives home, cigar in hand, and announces that "Tommy's Rattle" won. "Here's your 330 quid," he says, handing it over. "330 quid?? It should be 500," Vera declares. Jack tells her he took the price and specified 33 to 1, but Vera doesn't believe him and demands that he empty his pockets. Jack won't, so she rushes to him and rifles through his coat pockets herself. What does she find -- his winnings! Jack tries to explain, but Vera finds it very convenient that Jack won £165, just about what she thinks she's missing. She assumes that the remaining fiver was spent on the cigar and says she'll be gracious and won't ask for it, but warns Jack not to diddle her again.

Craig and Tracy drive up to Deirdre's. Tracy knocks on the door while Craig waits in the van. Deirdre is thrilled to see Tracy and invites her in, but Tracy says Craig is waiting. They were passing by so she thought she'd stop and let Deirdre know that everything is okay, but they're off to see some friends. Deirdre invites them both over another time. "No hidden agenda," she assures Tracy. "Just for something to eat." Tracy says she'll ask him, and they leave. Deirdre is pleased that Tracy stopped by.

Mr. Sugden and Emily head over to the Platts, where the party is in full swing and plenty of sparklers and fireworks are in evidence. Kevin is dispensing "Webster specials" to the adults, who are slowly getting sloshed. Des arrives and Raquel happily greets him, until she sees Tanya behind him. "Des invited me," Tanya informs Raquel. Tanya wants to know why everyone keeps asking Des if he's alright, and he tells her that last year he was at the party with Lisa. The effigy of Mr. Sugden is carried into the garden to much laughter and shouting, and Martin sets it alight. Everyone cheers. At that moment, Emily arrives. Her smile turns to dismay when she spots Percy's likeness in flames. Percy, on her heels, is equally upset. He shows his baked offering (no pun intended!) to Gail, saying that he made it for the children and will just leave it. An embarrassed Gail says, "it was meant to be a joke." But Percy is very hurt, and as the closing music begins, he leaves the garden without another word. The credits roll over a shot of the effigy's burning face.

Sarah Ettritch

Rev. Bernard Morton - ROLAND MACLEOD Craig Lee - KIERAN O'BRIEN
Written by - KEN BLAKESON Directed by - BRIAN MILLS

Tuesday (3617, Monday 8 November 1993)

Andy is sitting in the empty cafe with a cuppa in front of him. Steve appears at the door and Andy lets him in. He tells Steve they're not open yet but Steve wants a word not a drink. (I had to think about the location of this scene a couple of times. Why is Andy using the cafe like an extension of his upstairs flat? Guess they didn't have an upstairs flat interior they could use for filming.) Anyway Steve is there to remind Andy that when Amy returns from Trinidad tomorrow she will want to know about the wedding arrangements. Specifically, who else knows about the wedding, apart from Steve, Andy and herself. "There's loads of time for that," says Andy. Steve says he's not impressed Andy hasn't told his Mum and Dad yet and he doesn't think Amy will be either. Steve starts for the door but Andy stops him. "What's he like this morning?" "Jolly Jim? Same as usual. But don't worry I've sort of prepared him." Andy wants to know how and Steve tells him that he's told Jim Andy wants to have a chat. "Oh thanks!" Steve tells Andy Jim needs telling and so does Liz so he'd better get on with it.

In the Mini Mart Deirdre supposes that Emily wouldn't join her for a meal tonight. "With Tracy and Craig? No thank you." Deirdre sighs, "Sixteen and living over the brush!* Where did I go wrong?" Emily hopes Deirdre isn't going to play the hurt parent as that would only end in a free-for-all. Deirdre still can't get over how quickly Tracy has grown up. Emily reminds her that Tracy is not a criminal no matter what she's done. She advises Deirdre to keep things in perspective. "Oh well, I'm giving them steak tonight - the budget doesn't run to fatted calf." Emily winces "I shouldn't say that either!" Emily advises tact and diplomacy but Deirdre continues to speculate. "Maybe she wants to move back in . . " Emily observes that we are all selfish with our parents and it will be her turn one day. "Oh no! Don't say she coming to tell me she's pregnant!" Martin arrives looking for marmalade as Sarah-Lou chucked theirs at David. Deirdre hopes she missed. "Oh yes, she's got her mother's temper but she just doesn't aim as well!" Emily sniffs that if they're not set a good example what can you expect. She is referring to the unfortunate Guy Fawkes effigy. Martin tells her it was just a joke. "And in very poor taste!" Emily marches out. Deirdre wants to know what that was about. Martin is reluctant but Deirdre presses him. "Come on, this is me you're talking to, little Miss Charm and Diplomacy, what went on?"

*Living over the brush - a quaint Old English term for 'without benefit of clergy' or shacking up.

Andy comes out of the Kabin and approaches the garage where he can see Jim under the hood of a car. "How's it going?" Jim says he could tell him better if he had some food in his stomach but Steve had the last of the bread for breakfast. Andy offers to bring some groceries from Betterbuys after work. "What's this I hear from Steve? You want to have a word with me?" Andy is caught unawares and simultaneously Jim catches his finger on some engine part. Jim tries not to swear over his mishap. "Well tell me then!" "Oh nothing really. Just that I'd bring you some food round after work." Andy has lost his bottle.

Jack wants to know if the postman has been. "Well there's no birthday cards if that's what you're thinking." It's Jack's birthday but there is no card from Terry. "Never mind, here's mine and a present." She gives him a kiss. "I can always rely on you Vera, you never let me down." "Yeah," says Vera "another year older and deeper in debt!" Jack reminds her of her big win. Vera tells him that money is going on Tommy for Christmas so he shouldn't bother looking in his card. Jack reads the verse aloud "Though years go by and locks turn grey, Our hearts forever 'twined will stay." He beams,"Lovely that!" He opens the present. It's a pair of black socks. "Dead smart." Jack says he fancies going for a meal but it turns our he fancies Vera paying for it. She is not impressed. "You've had yer present!" "Yes I know, but socks . ." "Yes, socks!" Vera is incensed. "Socks, one for each foot. What are you complaining about?!"

In the Rovers' back room Tanya is complaining to Bet about Raquel. "Even mates pay rent. . ." Bet continues to flip her magazine and drink her tea. "If she had it she'd give it." Tanya points out that Raquel had enough to buy the answering machine and what does she need the stupid thing for anyway? "In case New York rings while she's asleep." Bet doesn't miss a beat. "New York?" "Yes, they're five hours behind aren't they?" Tanya opines they'd have to be a lot further behind to employ Raquel. The subject of the conversation enters in full facial mud mask and dressing gown. "That's a definite improvement," observes Pussycat Poole. Raquel, stopped in mid sentence, turns to Tanya and sweetly enquires if she has a magnifying glass on her dressing table. "'Cos if you haven't I recommend you get one and then you'll be able to see how much muck there is in your pores!" Before a cat fight breaks out, Bet breaks in and orders Tanya to go and do the bits and send Jack in. "I meant it as a compliment," is her parting shot, "I think it suits you!" Raquel has a letter in her hand and tells Bet that Tanya will be laughing on the other side of her face when she hears what's in the letter she has received from the modelling school. She reads the letter to Bet whose face becomes more fixed and stony as Raquel reads her the offer to partake in the 'Advance Modelling' course for pupils they feel capable of achieving international status. Bet tries to point out the downside, namely where is the money (fee as yet unknown) going to come from. Raquel blithely tells her the course isn't until next year and she will get some modelling jobs in the meantime. "Yes, but supposing you don't? Not enough anyway. Why can't you settle for what you've got?" "But Bet, it's the chance of a lifetime. . ." Bet holds her hand up to her forehead and shields the look of dismay and frustration from Raquel. Jack enters and Bet wishes him a Happy Birthday and tells him there is something on the mantelpiece for him. Raquel is oblivious of Jack's presence and she continues that if she's as good as they say she is maybe they'll let her pay when she's finished and working. "I don't think it works like that,love," says Bet gently. Meanwhile Jack has opened Bet's little present. It's a pair of socks!" Just what he wanted. Raquel finally notices Jack. "Oh did you get him socks? I got you socks as well, only they're still upstairs. Still, a fella can't have too many pairs of socks can he?"

"What's so important?" asks Liz of Andy. Having checked that Jim didn't send him round to see her. "What are you doing on the 26th? I've got something special on and I'd like you to be there." "Just me?" Andy tells her that Amy will be there and Dominic and Amy's Mum and Dad. "And your Dad?" "Well yes, but you won't have to speak to him if you don't want to." Liz's eyes widen, the penny drops. "This is why you wanted your birth certificate is it? I'm praying I'm wrong, so tell me I am. You're not going through with this wedding are you?" His face tells her her fears are realized.

In the Rovers Tanya is leaning against the back of the bar with her arms folded watching Raquel dispense pints at the front. "She's been like a whirling dervish all dinner," Tanya remarks to Bet. "She hasn't put her gloves on once." Bet is at the till and replies off- handedly that it's for demonstration purposes only, to show how good she is. "She's nothing special," sniffs Tanya within earshot the Golden Hands of Weatherfield. Bet calmly responds that it doesn't matter what Tanya thinks. "It's not you she's trying to impress." Steve calls for two more pints and Raquel steps forward blocking Tanya and beating her to the pump with a cheery "I'll do it." "Be my guest," sulks Tanya. "Don't ruin your manicure will you." Steve asks Jim if he's seen Andy and when Jim says he has Steve wants to know what he thinks. "About what?" "About what he said," responds Steve. Jim says Andy said he was going to bring some shopping round after work. Oh dear, Steve realizes Jim still doesn't know about Andy's wedding plans. He drops the subject.

Back at Liz's Andy is sitting with his head bowed as Liz delivers a maternal tongue lashing in the approved MTL manner with hands on hips. She tells Andy that she thought she knew him but since he left school he's lost the sense he was born with. "Well I've watched you throw away your education but I'll be damned if I'll sit back and watch you throw away your future!" Andy tells her he's an adult. "If you care anything for me. . . ." Andy rolls his eyes. "I do but I care for Amy too!" Liz's only possible conclusion to this remark is "She's pregnant isn't she?" When Andy denies this Liz folds her arems and gives him more grief and tells him he's mad. "And what about your father? He doesn't know does he? And if you think I'm going to tell him . . ." Andy says he will be telling Jim. Liz is in denial. "It is not happening!" Andy tells her fine. They'll carry on without her and while she busy worrying about what he's throwing away she should think about what she's thrown away. "You know the time and place. Me and Amy want you there. The rest is up to you!"

In Jim's Cafe Vera has been treating RTommy to a cream cake. Martin arrives and Vera congratulates him on his Guy Fawkes stunt. "I laughed like a drain when I heard about it!" Gail tries to play the incident down. "It's not funny Vera." Vera admits not for Percy Sugden maybe. "But you've got to admit it were a belter!" She tells Martin to let her know next time he's having a bonfire to give her a shout and they can burn RJack. Vera leaves and Martin wants to know what to do about starting supper. Gail advises he should apologize to Percy and Emily. He is reluctant. "Oh, they won't accept it." "You don't know till you try!"

In Betterbuys Elaine runs into Andy. She notes he's not been quite himself today and teases him gently by telling him everyone will be glad to see Amy back but not quite as glad as he will be. She tells him that he'd better check his next task with Mr Watts who coincidently is also not himself today either. "Christmas pressure getting to him?" Elaine says nothing like that. "Just different, strange, nothing I can put my finger on." She turns to go but Curly calls out to her and comes hurrying up dismissing Andy in the process. He starts to talk about Christmas promotions (to Santa or not to Santa) but the abruptly changes the the conversation and asks Elaine what she thinks of clairvoyance. "For Christmas?" "No speaking generally." Elaine tells him he's speaking strangely as far as she's concerned. "And why do you keep calling me Elaine all the time not that I mind but. . ." Curly repeats her name as if reciting some Arthurian legend. "Ah Elaine! Eeeelaine! - I quite like that." Elaine looks worried.

Martin is on his way to see Percy who is sweeping the sidewalk outside Emily's. A van draws up at Deirdre's and Tracy and Craig get out and knock on the door. "It'll be like we said, right?" Tracy checks with Craig. "Don't worry, I've had me tranquillizers," replies Craig sarcastically. Deirdre opens the door and greets them with a smile.

Martin arrives at Emily's. Percy is still sweeping and remains sweeping even when Martin apologizes. "Anything I can do to make amends, well you've just got to say." Percy carries on sweeping the flagstones. "Oh come on Percy, don't make it tougher than it already is!" Percy finally turns round and leans on his broom. "Do yer mean it?" Martin repeats that he's sorry. Percy means about the amends. Martin assents that he means it. "In that case I'll get a bucket of water and a shammy and you can do the windows!"

Andy has turned up at Jim's with some groceries. He tells Jim he has something to tell him and will he please sit down. "Because if you're sat down, well, you can't hit me can you?" "Oh important eh?" Jim sits. Andy asks him to let him talk and then Jim can have his say. He tells Jim he's getting married in two weeks and he wants Jim and Liz to be there. Jim sighs and shakes his head. "It's not as simple as getting the vicar to say a few words." Andy tells him it's all arranged. When Jim knows Andy has been to see Liz he jumps to the conclusion that she has given her blessing. Andy says nothing. "She would, because she believes in the sanctity of marriage so she does - as long as it's for other people!" "This is about me and Amy!" "Well you're certainly following in your father's footsteps. The younger you get married the younger you can get divorced!" Andy tells him it doesn't have to be like that.

The celebration of the Prodigal Daughter's Return to the Fold has reached the coffee stage. Tracy answers for Craig when it come to the question of milk and sugar. Craig grunts impressively. Tracy thanks her mother for the meal and the talk turns to cooking. Tracy says that Craig does most of the cooking as she always been 'allergic' to kitchens. Deirdre wants to know more but engaging Craig in conversation is as hard as talking to a Chatty Cathy with a broken pull string. Tracy speaks for both of them and Craig puts in his monosyllabic two cents every third sentence. During this encounter of the unnatural kind Deirdre finds out that Tracy and Craig often go to a Chinese restaurant where Craig is know to the staff as 'The Terminator' after he stopped a fight between two drunks with no blood spilled. Tracy burbles on about how proud she was of him and how the proprietor tore their bill up and they got a free meal. Deirdre looks dumbfounded. Craig doesn't look as if he'd say 'boo' to a goose. Tracy follows her Mum out to the kitchen. "I'm glad you like him, he likes you." "How can you tell? He doesn't say much." Tracy tells her he's shy. "Come on I'll wash up. You go in there and talk to Craig." Deirdre looks as if she'd rather wash up.

(For those of you who do watch the programme if you are wondering where you have seen Craig before Kieran O'Brien went on to play Mark Fitzgerald Fitz's son in Cracker. He was most recently seen in the TV movie Jason and the Argonauts.)

Although it's Jack's birthday it is Vera and Ivy that are going out. Jack has a night off and will baby-sit. The ladies are going to Bingo. Vera feels lucky after her win on the ponies. Jack bets her a fiver she won't win anything. Ivy has a card and present for Jack. "It's not socks is it?" "No aftershave, but I can change it." Ivy makes to take the package back. "No no give it here!" Jack grabs the prezzie greatfully. He sees them out the door with the farewell shot that Vera hasn't a hope in Hell of winning.

Tanya has left the bar to speak with Bet in the back room. "Well I've found out what was going on this dinner. Raquel working her way back in." Bet does not look up from her account book. "Congratulations! The penny's dropped!" Tanya wants to know where she stands. Bet continues multitasking (accounting, smoking and talking) "Exactly the same as before but I'd rather you were out front serving the customers." Tanya persists "Now she's back. I replaced her. Where does that leave me?" Bet informs her that Raquel isn't back she's just filling in when needed. "For how long?" "As long as I need her." Bet reminds Tanya whose name is above the front door.

Tanya returns to the bar. "Made your report have you?" remarks Raquel. "Don't worry. I'll be gone as soon as I've made my Advanced money." "Yer what?" Raquel explains about the Advanced Modelling Course. "To be used as required Bet said," Tanya tells Raquel. "So?" "Well that's the story of your life," Tanya sneers.

Steve and Andy are rehashing the days events over a pint. Andy vows that his parents aren't going to spoil tomorrow when Amy returns. "You'd better get an early night," Steve advises. Across the bar Curly is trying to convince Des that clairvoyance is for real. He didn't believe it at first but the lady in question is responding. "All this from what Maude said?" Curly tells him it can't be a coincidence - look at the money Vera won. Des observes that people win on the horses every day. "But Vera never bets on horses, just like I never thought about the young lady in question." Des wants to know if he has asked the lady in question out. Curly admits not. "Supposing she spits in your eye?" Curly tells Des he's a sceptic. Des tells Curly he's romantic. Des tells Curly that Maude couldn't predict tomorrow's daylight. Curly tells Des he's stupid. The drink their pints.

JAAACCCKKK! Vera is back from Bingo. She is elated. She's won a £100! "See you didn't believe me did you?" "Vera, sit down." "Add your fiver to this!" She is waving her money. "Vera, Sit down!" "I've split it with Ivy 50/50!" "VERA!!!" "What?" Jack tells her Auntie Cissie has been on the phone. "What for?" "It's your Dad, Josh. He collapsed. There's nowt they could do. He's died." Vera crumples into tears.

Libby Seekings

Craig Lee KIERAN O'BRIEN
Written By TOM ELLIOTT Directed By MERVYN CUMMING

Wednesday (3618, Wednesday 10 November 1993)

The post pops through the door as Steve walks downstairs chez MacDonald. He spots a white envelope, blanches and pockets it. He gives the rest to Jim. Now, what could be in that envelope?

Mystery solved! Sally delivers a similar white envelope to Kevin. It is to tell him of the court date for the case - two weeks from this Friday.

Vera is teary at the table as Jack walks in. He tries to comfort her by saying that he had a good many innings and he would want V to go on with life. She agrees with this and Jack then suggests a good fry up for breakfast. Vera doesn't want one but Jack does and he has to go about making it himself. Well, he tries to make it but has to keep asking where everything for it is kept (lol). In the midst of this, Ivy comes calling to see if Vera needs any shopping or other done. V says no, thanks and would Ivy like a cuppa? Ivy is all ready to put the kettle on but Vera says no bother, Jack will do it! Cue a disgruntled look from Jack!

Sally and Kevin discuss the upcoming court date. She is optimistic that he won't get jail time but maybe a fine or community service instead. Kevin is thinking of all possible options before him, including jail time. She doesn't want him getting himself in a right state over it all as that won't help matters any. He says he can't help it as it is a rather large, looming cloud over life for him at the moment. Sally is looking forward to getting this whole thing decided so they can begin to live their lives again without having the constant worry and fear of the unknown. She continues to try and make him see that it won't be as bad as he is thinking and tells him that whatever happens, they will face it together.

Bettabuys - Andy is stocking the shelves with the air of one very happy with life. Amy and Dom are coming home that afternoon. (I wouldn't be surprised if some of those pop cans might be involved in a game of beer hunter with the enthusiastic way he's chucking them onto the shelves!) Steve is there to pick up a few cans but, I think, it was just an excuse to see Andy so he could talk to someone about the court date. Andy asks whether Jim hit the roof but Steve hasn't told him as he doesn't want to make his own life a misery before he has to. (steve was doing this crazy bug eyed thing during this scene - go to your mirror - cake on baby powder and then open your eyes wide - you will have steve's appearance here!)

Miss Fenwick has just helped a customer when Curly , oops, Mr. Watts comes along. The short of the ensuing discussion is that when there are personnel decisions to be made, he wants them to go through him seeing as he is the one who has to be responsible for that. She tells him she thought that being assistant manager meant she had some leeway in making decisions and that, seeing how he was on the phone at the time, she just used her best judgement to avoid long queues for shoppers. "Don't worry, Mister Watts. It won't happen again."

Back at the Duckworth's - V looks a bit perkier now as she and Tommy have just come back from the shops. A knock at their door reveals Auntie Cissie - V's aunt. Talk turns to the funeral on Friday. Vera tells her aunt that she wants to have the luncheon after the funeral at her place. She is told not to go to a big bother as there won't be many there. Vera insists on it though as it is one of the last things she can do for her father. She also tells her aunt that she agrees with keeping the arrangements simple and is somewhat surprised to hear that it has to be as he didn't leave any provisions for the funeral.

Mr. Watts is paged to the store phone. He listens then heads off to an aisle where Miss Fenwick and Maureen are standing. Maureen explains what she had told Miss F. - she would like to switch shifts with another co-worker. Fine, fine, says Curly. He walks after Miss F to ask why she had him paged for that. She tells him it was an important issue - staff control - after all and he had said that anything related to staff decisions was his domain. He tells her she is deliberately making a big issue over this. She denies that saying it is he who is the issue maker.

At the airport, Andy is waiting at the arrivals gate. His smile soon turns into a fly catching look as he doesn't see Amy or Dom come off the plane - just her Mum. She tells him that Amy has decided to stay in Trinidad. Over a cup of tea, the two discuss Amy's decision. Andy can't believe what is going on. It is explained that Amy feels that Andy has given up too much for them already and that she couldn't see the relationship working out. He is given back the ring and is told that if he does love her, to let her be to get on with her life.

Rover's - Percy tells Jack that he knew Raquels' modelling course was a waste of time. If it wasn't, then why is she back at the Rover's? He then asks for another half and Jack calls Raquel over to serve him telling her that Percy has loads of thoughts on modelling and the like! Right beside this action sits glum Kevin, pondering life as only a pessimist can. Jim comes in for a drink and chats to Kevin. Jim gets a little confused with K's talk about letters and court until - ding, ding, ding, the lightbulb goes on - kevin realizes that Steve hasn't told Jim anything.

Vera and Tommy are over at the corner shop to pick up a loaf of bread when Des walks in. He coos and smiles at Tommy, tells Vera he is sorry for her loss and offers to look after Tommy during the funeral if she needs it. Vera tells him no thanks as she has already made arrangements with Sally. She tells him that she appreciates the offer and is quite nice to him about it. She goes off home and Dierdre reassures Des saying that Vera really had made the arrangements with Sally. He says he knows and that child minding really isn't his thing but he had to offer.

Sally is lost in another dimension at the café as she contemplates the court date. Gail and she talk it over. Sal tells gail that she doesn't know if she can cope with two more weeks of trying to get Kevin see the bright side. She also admits that although she would never say it to Kevin, she wonders what will happen if he does end up going to jail.

Andy is with phone book and phone and asking about flights to Trinidad.

It is quitting time at Bettabuys and both Miss fenwick and Mr. Watts look the worse for wear. They decide to go out for a drink and try to work through their differences.

Martin buys steve a drink after a little bit of bar flirting with Tanya. Martin tells Steve to just tell jim about the hearing date. Steve says it's not that easy and he has to choose his time wisely. Jim comes in and asks whether Steve has anything to tell him or if it's only Kevin who is up in front of the judge in a fortnight's time. -oops, time's up steve! Lol

At the Queen's, Liz says hello to "Curly" giving him a few uneasy moments and a few giggles for Miss fenwick. They work a few things out over their drink and then decide to have another drink and more talk.

Jack is on his way to the legion to toast joss and to leave vera for an hour with her memories. She tells him that it is a great comfort to her to know that Jack feels the same way as she does about her father and giving him a good send off. He agrees and she says that she knew he wouldn't mind. Jack pauses and says "Mind?" "well you know that money I won" Jack looks ill as she tells him that she has been to the undertaker's and has told them to do it up proper and to send her the bill for it.

Steve is at andy's and discovers that Amy hasn't come back. He tells Andy that there isn't much he can do about it now then, is there? Andy tells him that it doesn't matter what the cost, time or trouble, he is going to bring Amy and Dom home.

Judith Cooper

Auntie Cissie - FRANCES COX Kath Nelson - ALIBE PARSONS
Written by BARRY HILL Directed by MERVYN CUMMING

Thursday (3619, Friday 12 November 1993)

Friday (3620, Monday 15 November 1993)

Steve seems sympathetic towards Andy's plight. (but then he was never against the marriage, just that they were doing it in secret). Jim is less sympathetic. He and Steve discuss it, Jim feeling Amy saw sense and did the right thing so that Andy will have a future. Sure Andy is heartbroken but maybe Amy is too. Steve looks at his father incredulously. (has no one told Jim about Amy and the father of her kid? Doesn't sound like heart broken to me!) Steve seems disgusted that Jim is more concerned and hopeful that Andy will now go back to school. Yer dreamin'.

Curly corners Reg coming out of his flat and tries to persuade Reg to cancel Elaine's transfer to Goole (well, at least I hope it isn't "Ghoul"!) but Reg refuses to rescind his decision. Curly asked him to get Elaine out from under his feet and he's done so and isn't going to lose face now. Case closed. Car door closed and away Reg drive

Gail knocks on the flat door, having brought up tea and toast for Andy. There's a heap of blankets on the sofa that moves a bit and a bleary eye peeks out and tells Gail he's fine, thanks but no thanks for the tea. Gail goes back downstairs and she and Alma discuss Andy's situation sympathetically.

Tanya is in the salon looking for an appointment but Denise tells her she can't be fit in until the afternoon which only sets Tanya off on a resentful rant about Raquel probably getting premier treatment which Denise denies. Raquel would have to wait same as her, she firmly tells Tanya who flounces out in a furious flurry. Denise comments to Fiona that Bet certainly has her hands full.

Indeed.

Raquel sits at the table and starts applying even more makeup than she already has on and blathering on about showing people who don't believe she can make it as a model, it's all just jealous she witters on. Meanwhile Betty drones on about the death and funeral of someone she and Bet seem to know. Bet is trying to do paperwork and finally asks betty not to be so morbid. Betty goes off snarling the way she does to make a start and Raquel continues on her track. Tanya arrives back from the salon in full bitch mode and she and Raquel start arguing about the answerphone again until Bet has enough and tosses them both out of the room. Add to this the fact that Tanya didn't get her cuppa and they continue back and forth until we hear Raquel stomp up the stairs. Bet sighs heavily.

Elaine discusses staff matters with Curly who tries to turn the conversation personal in a round about manner. How does she feel about the store? The job? Their working relationship? Elaine is businesslike. Curly does mention that she may get her own store someday and lies and says no he hasn't heard anything about that sort of thing yet. Elaine would love to have her own store but thinks it would depend on where and this time of year, just before Christmas would be a nightmare to start someplace new. Curly bashfully admits he would prefer her to stay there, forever if he could. She looks as if she's not quite sure how to take that, although flattered at least on a professional level, or so she lets on.

Mike is propping up the café counter while Gail tries to persuade him to take Alma away for Christmas. Mike is curious to see Steve who is supposed to be working, come through the caff. Unsuccessful in trying to see Andy, the women suppose and begin to discuss the situation which Emily can hardly miss overhearing, sitting at a table nearby. She listens with increasing concern as Gail and Alma discuss getting the extra key to get in and check Andy's ok.

In fact, Andy is not in the flat. He's crossing the road to Amy's house. Her mother lets him in reluctantly, unsure of what else could be said. Andy wants to know more about Dominick's father and is told that while the lad was a bit of a wastrel and let Amy down badly when she got pregnant, he seems to have changed and is trying very hard to make up for things. Andy painfully asks, does she love him? There isn't a direct answer but Kath points out, she chose him and that's got to stand. Andy swallows the lump in his throat and bravely wishes Amy well. He sadly leaves. Kath walks over and picks up a photo of her daughter, the last glimpse of Amy we will see.

Bet and Raquel head out shopping. This is Bet's idea to take Raquel with her, the motive being to keep the area behind the bar from becoming Ground Zero. Emily is sticking her oar in telling Jim how concerned Gail and Alma were about Andy. Jim realizes he's been less than supportive, thanks Emily and puts in a call to Liz.

Elaine tries to persuade Maureen into attending a staff Christmas party but Maureen doesn't want to take the chance that Reg will crash the party even though she is assured he isn't invited. Curly hears about the party that Elaine has taken upon herself to organize and reluctantly agrees to it. He later tells Maureen about Elaine's transfer to Goole. Maureen correctly guesses Curly's growing feelings (which he would never have had if Maud hadn't put the idea in his head, I might add!) Maureen urges her erstwhile lover to fight for Elaine, not to let Reg ruin his life as he did hers.

Mike overhears Steve on the phone in the print shop spinning a wild tale to someone at the hospital in a bid to track down Amy's friend Alison. (She's a nurse) Something about being in the Persian Gulf for two years and only in town for the day. Mike of course tears a strip off Steve for playing hooky earlier and using his phone to chat up women.

Bet and Raquel have returned from shopping and, Lo and Behold there is a message on that infernal answer phone for a job for Raquel! She calls the man back and is crestfallen that since she was not at home, the job has been given to someone else. This is so stupid. She says the bloke assumed she was either on holiday or on another job, but you know she would have obsessively recorded a message on the machine to say so, so the only point of this seems to be to increase the resentment Tanya is feeling toward Raquel. Raquel is heard to say that she should have allowed Tanya to answer the phone after all so she could have told the man Raquel wouldn't be gone long and, in the bar, Tanya is moaning to Betty that Raquel had insisted she let the machine take the calls and will probably get the blame anyway. Something's going to give.

Steve has finally caught up with Andy and is trying to persuade Andy to help him track down Alison. He feels bad about Andy's situation but since he can't help Andy, at least his brother could help him! Not one to waste an opportunity, is our Steve, Andy points out sardonically. There's a knock on the door and Steve lets Jim and Liz in. They proceed to make a complete bollocks of a show of support for their son. Jim optimistically predicts Amy will come back, so she will. Liz softly says she never approved of the wedding but didn't want it to end like this (yes she did) and she hates to see him hurting. The gist of their attitude comes across as patronizing to me at least and apparently to Andy who blows up. He has given everything of himself for someone else and for his future with that someone else. You do, don't you, when you love someone. (Grown up a lot, hasn't he?) Then one day you wake up and It's all gone, all of it so don't tell him how he feels. Then, astonishingly, he turns it into a shot directed at Liz's actions with Colin and refusing to take Jim back, "Ask me dad!" Liz leaves in a hurry and Jim quietly admonishes his son, "Y'er not being fair!" before he too leaves.

In the pub, Alma defends Steve to Mike who flatly states he doesn't trust the younger man. Don tries to persuade Denise into staying a bit longer but she's got paperwork to do. Des unwittingly adds more fuel to the fire by defending Raquel when Tanya, taking advantage of their recently forged friendship to slag off Raquel. Bet sends her off to serve and quickly warns Des off Tanya, she's dynamite.

At Bettabuys, Curly mournfully fondles a bag of onions as Reg breezes in wanting to commandeer the stationery cabinet key. It turns into a control issue and Curly orders Reg into his office where he proceeds to beg Reg to change his decision and reverse the transfer. Reg resolutely refuses, becoming quietly angry. And when Curly implies that he'll call Head Office over Reg's authority, Reg leans over Curly menacingly, all twitches suddenly vanished and he warns him not to try it, threatening him with a very bleak future, career wise. Does he understand? Nod your head. He does. Hand over the keys to the cabinet. He does. Reg leaves and Curly sits for a minute. Then equally resolutely places a call to Mrs. Rogers in HO.

Diane Johnston

Kath Nelson ALIVE PARSONS
Written by TOM ELLIOTT Directed by DAVID PENN


Originally transmitted: 17, 19, 22, 24 & 26 November 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 28 August - Friday 1 September 2000
Episode Numbers: 3621 - 3625

Monday (3621, Wednesday 17 November 1993)

At the MacDonald home, Jim wakes up to a blaring radio and a sink full of dirty dishes. Steve is lounging on the sofa watching TV. Jim asks what time Steve got home from the clubs. "2ish" is his reply". Missing the reason for Jim's query, he adds, "did I disturb you?" Figuring he's not going to get any help, Jim sets to the task of clearing the sink.

At Bettabuys, Maureen catches Curly in his office before work. Before she gets a chance to speak, Curly tells her that she was right about Reg. But Maureen, after sleeping on it, has decided that she may have given Curly bad advice about fighting to keep Elaine, because she knows how vindictive Reg can be. "Vindictive?" a suddenly subdued Curly asks. "I wouldn't ring head office," Maureen cautions him in a hushed tone. She suggests that Curly try persuasion instead of blatantly undermining Reg's authority. When Curly tells her it's too late, Maureen says, "oh dear. I suppose I've just ruined your day then."

Mike calls on Jim. Steve claims he was just leaving for work and bolts. Mike gives Jim the number of some bloke to call regarding a car. He didn't want to call on Kevin with the information because of "all those screaming kids". Mike's off to London overnight on business. Jim apologizes for the mess. Mike suggests that perhaps a stint in the army would have done Steve and Andy some good, which Jim snorts at. Mike then asks Jim if Liz is happy at the Queens. There's a long pause before Jim says, "Yes, I believe she is." He's not pleased by the question.

At the Rovers, the ladies are having their morning tea and perusing the mail. Raquel squeals when she sees a letter from Caroline, who was on the modeling course with her. This causes everyone to discuss pen pals that they've had (Betty had pen pals during the war, Tanya had a swiss pen pal from a skiing holiday at school). "Wot the 'ells this!" Bet exclaims, when she comes across a poster for the Newton & Ridley Pub Poetry Competition. "Well, they've set me some tasks, but this gets the medal!" First prize is 100 quid, and the winning poem will be printed on the beer mats. She tells Betty to put the posters up around the bar. Raquel mentions that she used to have to comfort Caroline, who felt she was too "top heavy" to get a modeling job.

Andy is back at work. Maureen spots him and scurries over to find out where Amy is. Andy ignores her and leaves without answering her question. Curly tells Elaine he has heartburn. She tells Curly her dad had a trick for that. Keep your back straight and breathe from the diaphragm. Curly tries it and feels a bit better, until she mentions that Reg Holdsworth called and is on his way over. Curly groans and clutches his chest.

Jim is having his hair "tidied up" at the salon during a slow time at the garage. He tells Denise that he's thinking of doing a bit of redecorating at the house, and if Steve throws a few coats of paint on the walls, perhaps he'll stop treating the place like a guest house. Denise says he can't put up with that for long. Suddenly, Fiona throws a towel over Jim's head. "What are you doing?" Denise shouts as she leaps out of the way. "Shhhutup!" Fiona snaps, as Mike Baldwin strides in, looking for Alma. "I thought you were in London," Denise says. Mike explains that he's been held up, and asks that if they see Alma, to give her the message that he'll see her tonight. After he's gone, Jim tells the girls that they've earned themselves a Christmas tip.

Raquel has read more of Caroline's letter and is dismayed that Caroline is modeling cars at Earl's Court when she, Raquel, graduated from the modeling course with distinction. Bet suggests that Raquel phone her agent, and Tanya explains that they usually employ "top heavy" models to sell boy's toys. An upset Raquel rushes off, saying that she's had enough and is packing it in. Predictably, Tanya finds the whole thing amusing. Bet tells her to cut it out.

On his lunch hour, Steve is at home, still trying to track down student nurse Alison Rathbone, and he leaves a message at the hospital again. Jim arrives home (with his hair looking exactly as it usually does), and asks Steve if he'll pick up some paint and wallpaper that afternoon. Steve says it'll have to be something sexier than DIY if he's going to skive off Baldwin. Jim notices some leftover beans in a pot on the stove and insists that Steve get rid of them that moment. He lectures Steve about keeping the place clean. Steve gives Jim's back a mock salute as Jim leaves for the garage.

Back at the salon, Raquel is in the chair. Fiona asks if the cut is for something special or just casual. "Rub it in, why don't you," Raquel snaps. She jumps from the chair and grabs her coat. "I'll do it myself," she says on her way out, leaving a perplexed Fiona and Denise behind. The phone rings as Fiona is recounting to Denise exactly what she said to Raquel. Denise answers it, but there doesn't seem to be anyone on the other end.

In the Bettabuys lunchroom, Andy announces what's happened by writing "SHE'S DUMPED ME!" in large black letters on the whiteboard. "Is that clear enough for you?" he shouts to everyone present. Curly begins to chase after him when Andy marches from the room, but bumps into a clearly irked Reg. Curly assumes that Reg is upset about Elaine, but Reg complains that his parking spot was taken.

A dejected Raquel is blow drying her hair in front of the telly when Bet says, "I bet I can make you smile." Offering her hand, she leads Raquel to her answering machine and tells her to press the button. There's a message for "Nadia Wolstenhume", from someone who wants to book her for a shoot. All she has to do is show up at the Armani building at a specified day and time. "Oh Bet," a wide-eyed Raquel breathes. "I don't believe it." She plays the message again to convince herself that it's true.

Out in the pub, Derek is laughing about the poetry competition. Bet gravely tells him that she's counting on him to represent the Rovers. "Newton and Ridley make you tiddly," Des contributes. Bet and Des encourage Derek to enter the contest.

In Curly's office, Maureen is fretting to Elaine that she may be partly to blame for Andy's behaviour. The phone rings and Elaine answers it -- it's Mrs. Rogers for Reg. Elaine pages him, and upon hearing this, Maureen becomes even more agitated. Curly rushes to the office, and when he hears that it's Mrs. Rogers, grabs the phone from Elaine and tells Mrs. Rogers that Reg is busy with a customer. He slams the phone down just as Reg enters the office. "She's gone but says she'll ring back," Curly quickly tells Reg. "Just a minute," a puzzled Elaine interrupts. Maureen attempts to the save the situation by asking Elaine if she can discuss a personal problem with her outside the office. Elaine leaves with Maureen, but not before shaking her head at Curly. Reg says that Elaine needs to be told about her new position and pages her to return to the office. Curly grabs the microphone away and says she needs to know only "if and when". Reg picks up on the "if" and the penny drops as to why Curly was so keen to get rid of Mrs. Rogers. Elaine arrives but Curly shuts the door on her, leaving her outside. Reg warns Curly that "if you've done what I think you have, you better start selling your house!". He puts in a call to head office.

Andy comes into the café. Audrey reminds him that he shouldn't be using the café door, so he leaves. Alma is a bit cross with Audrey since Andy looked upset, but Audrey is unrepentant and warns Alma not to let him take advantage. Audrey sits down with a cup of tea and a cake, and Alma asks her when she's going to start paying for her snacks. "I'm covering for Gail's dentist appointment," Audrey protests. "Beginning when, closing time?" Alma asks. "Really!" Audrey retorts. She takes her snack to the counter and snaps at a customer waiting for service. She immediately apologizes, saying she's just practicing her mood swings.

Outside his office, Curly anxiously waits for Reg to finish speaking with Mrs. Rogers. Reg is livid when he emerges from the office, and many angry words are exchanged. Reg is upset that Curly seems to have won this scrap, but warns Curly that he should never relax because Reg won't forget what just happened. After Reg has stormed off, Curly smiles as he watches Elaine hang a sign.

Jim arrives home with a box of wallpaper and is very impressed to see that the house has been vacuumed and the kitchen cleaned. He asks Steve to pick up a paste table that Denise is going to lend them. It's clear from the way that Steve is standing that he has something to tell Jim. He's been to see Liz and he's moving back into the Queens. Jim blows up, telling Steve that he was just waiting for an argument to happen so he could toddle back to his mom, and this is probably why he wasn't doing his share of the housework. But he quickly calms down and tells Steve to just go and not to worry about helping him with the decorating.

Tanya watches an ecstatic Raquel move through the bar. Raquel approaches Denise and asks for a favour. Derek and Mavis examine a few beer mats, trying to figure out how many words a poem entry should contain based on what can fit onto the mats. Derek figures they're in with a chance as long as they write something that rhymes, because nobody else in the Rovers will be able to produce a poem. Curly begins to tell Des about his day, but Reg comes in and they exchange looks across the bar. Denise is thrilled about Raquel's news, telling her it generally takes ages to break into modeling clothing. Raquel asks if she can borrow Denise's evening gown, and Denise agrees. Denise spots Jim and reminds him that the paste table hasn't been picked up. Jim tells her that he'll take a rain check on it.

Alma drops in on Andy with the excuse that she's checking to see if he needs milk, but quickly moves on to the subject of Amy. Andy is still having a hard time accepting Amy's decision. Alma tells Andy that it does get easier, and not to let anyone rush him. She leaves him to his thoughts and his photos.

Jim is back at home opening a jar when the phone rings. It's Vicki. Jim says he can't take a message and to try the Queens. But Steve isn't at the Queens. He's at the hospital, where he finally finds Alison. He gives Alison his new address at the Queens, but she doesn't seem very pleased to see him.

Back at the house, Jim begins to pick at the old wallpaper, then suddenly begins to tear off large strips in anger. "That about sorts the pair of us out, I would've thought," he mutters to himself as another large strip is ripped off. The credits roll.

Sarah Ettritch

Alison Rathbone - RACHEL SMITH
Written by - PAUL ABBOTT Directed by - DAVID PENN

Tuesday (3622, Friday 19 November 1993)

At Bettabuys Andy is helping Maureen in frozen foods but as the opening music fades a Tannoy announcement requests his presence in the Manager's office. As Andy leaves, Reg appears from behind a pillar in singing "O cara mia . . " Maureen carries on stacking the merchandise. When Reg remarks he wishes he could sing like Pavarotti Maureen tells him to save his breath. He offers to sing that great aria from La Boheme - Your Tiny Hand Is Frozen - but Maureen is in no mood for Reg or his sense of humour and she tells him to get lost. Reg ignores this instruction and sidles around Maureen. He croons something in Italian, grabs her hand and kisses it. Maureen resists, and reminds him she could make a complaint. "This is sexual harassment!" "No, no it's Puccini and in the original Italian." Reg shifts into seduction mode and tries to put his arms round Maureen. She will not be beguiled. Grabbing one of the tubs she thrusts it into Reg's hands to cool his ardour. "Then I suggest you find somebody with her own ice cream cart!" She breaks away and strides up the frozen food aisle, a scene shown on the security camera. As the screen widens we see that Curly Watts has been watching Maureen and Reg on the video in his office. There is a knock. Andy appears. Curly tells him he has good news. The information on the management trainee course has arrived and Andy will be going to Kidderminster on the eighteenth. Andy looks sheepish. He was going to ask Curly not to put his name forward. Curly tells Andy that he knows what he's going through because he's been there himself but you don't chuck everything away. "You do well at Kidderminster and you'll be in the fast lane." Andy suggests he sends someone who wants to be on the motorway. Curly tells him that in a month everything will look different. "I hope so because I'll be in India by then - or somewhere like it." Curly tells him to come back when he's making more sense. Andy says there's no point because he's handing in his notice. But Curly won't accept it. He sends Andy away to have a rethink. Andy sighs and leaves. "Why is it always India?" Curly wonders out loud.

The salon door opens and Raquel bursts in. "Can you fit me in?" Denise is surprised and reminds Raquel that she couldn't do anything for her yesterday. "Well yesterday was yesterday," breezes Raquel, "I didn't know then that today were the day." She tells Denise and Fiona about the fashion shoot. "It's been mentioned it's for Georgio," she tells them in confidential tones. "Georgio who?" says Fiona. "Armani!" They are impressed. Denise wants to know more. The phone starts to ring and she asks Fiona to take the call. Raquel can't tell Denise much about the job. She is wittering on about her specialized hands and how she's had to give up bar work when Fiona puts the phone down. "It's happened again!" "What nobody there?" enquires Denise. Apparently not. Denise tells Raquel this has been happening a lot lately. "It's not . . Heavy breathing? asks Raquel tentatively. Fiona tells her it's just "nothing". If it was heavy breathing she'd breathe heavy back! The ladies turn to the task of transforming Raquel into a supermodel.

Back at Bettabuys Curly watches from one end of an aisle while Reg and Maureen are seen, but not heard, in animated conversation at the other end. Curly retreats round the corner. He tells her to keep out of the aisle over there as the area manager is conducting his love life."He's been buzzing in and out all morning!" Elaine tells Curly he should put his foot down about this behaviour as he's interfering with staff. Curly tells her that he doesn't want to make an enemy of Reg at Head Office. "He's a big enough liability as a friend." Elaine comments "He's oversexed if you ask me." "Well you can't condemn a man for that it's not a crime." Elaine points out that it would be if it was a woman. "Huh?" Curly asks her to explain. Elaine tells him that a woman can hardly go leching up to a man saying "I don't half fancy you love." "Well, I'd like you to remember, Elaine, that we work in an equal opportunity environment." Before Elaine can respond they are interrupted by an old lady who wants to know where they've hidden the tapioca.

Down the aisle, Reg is cajoling Maureen. he is still trying to explain the Debi Scott debacle. "I was giving her the old soft soap, yes. But it was wheeling and dealing I never. . ." "Well don't bring your soft soap to me!" counters Maureen, emphasizing her point with her price gun, "Or your wheeling and your dealing. Reg protests that he should be in Buxton and that he has restructured the schedule for the whole of the North of England to talk with her this morning. "Then you've inconvenienced a lot of people haven't you? That's all, because I don't care." Maureen walks away and Reg throws up his hands in despair.

Curly and Elaine enter the Manager's Office. He asks Elaine if she could manage a couple of extra hours this evening to go through some figures. She tells him she could but of course she would miss her lift. Curly says he could give her a lift and later if the were a bit peckish they could . . . Elaine agrees they could . . .get something to eat . . Curly is sort of making a date and Elaine is sort of accepting it. Reg interrupts the tête à tête. Elaine excuses herself and leaves. Reg looks despondent. He's come to ask Curly for advice. Curly points out he can give advice till the cows come home the question is, "Will you take it?" Reg wonders if it isn't too late. He wants Curly to tell him how to put his life back together. "I've made a cock-up of everything," he says sombrely.

The next scene shown was totally out of continuity. Andy enters the café from the door that leads to the upstairs flat. Gail and Alma greet him with Good Mornings and offer him breakfast. Andy protests he doesn't want breakfast (I should say not - haven't we seen Andy at work already today? Isn't it already nearly lunchtime at Bettabuys?) After clucking over him like a pair of mother hens Alma and Gail get the message that breakfast is not required. Andy really wants to talk to Alma about giving notice. She tells him a month is required but sensing he would like to leave earlier she tells him if he wants to go back to his father's house she understands and the end of the week would be OK. "I'll be really sorry to see you go Andy," says Alma with as much sincerity in her voice as she can muster. Gail's face shows what she thinks of this remark and she wisely keeps her head down and her mouth shut.

At Bettabuys Maureen is still being accosted by the tapioca obsessed pensioner who is demanding to know the country of origin. "Are you boycotting somewhere?" asks Maureen helpfully. No the old lady is just interested. Curly comes up and is asked where the tapioca comes from. Misunderstanding, he tells her, "the cassava root." Curly wants a word with Maureen. He tells her he is fed up with her snivelling on the shop floor and Reg snivelling in his office. He has told Reg to change the fixture to neutral ground - the Rovers tonight. Curly promises Maureen that if she gives Reg the 'black spot' he will do the decent thing. "He may not shoot himself but I have his word that he will never bother you again!"

Raquel is standing in front of the mirror in the Rovers living room. Her back is towards Bet and she turns round for approval of what she calls her 'Lilli Marlena Deitrich' look. Bet remarks that she always thought Marlena looked as if she had a bad cough but on Raquel - terrific. Raquel is wearing a black cocktail dress with a key-hole front and semi-sheer back and sleeves. She has black gloves and a black bag edged with rhinestones. Her hair is in a chignon with a net. The earrings are worthy of La Lynch herself. This is Raquel's version of sophistication. She confesses she has butterflies and feels a little sick but Bet gives her a Lynch seal of approval. She tells Raquel that if she is going to be hanging around "by the barrack gates" on a cold November night she'll catch hypothermia. "Do you have a coat?" "They'll probably have a Winnibago." "A Winniwhat?" says Bet. Oh a motor trailer. Nevertheless she offers Raquel her fake fur coat and drapes it round her shoulders enticingly. Raquel is nearly seduced but tells Bet it's not quite right. "Oh well in that case. . " Bet pulls the coat back sounding not a little miffed. Raquel explains that the coat is more Versace than Armani and they are so dead jealous of each other she doesn't want to get off on the wrong foot. "Will he be there, this Armani?" asks Bet. No answer from Raquel. The butterflies are fluttering again.

Curly finishes a phone conversation in the Bettabuys staff area. He sees Andy leaving and reminds him that they were supposed to talk again that day. Andy reels off all the things he supposed Curly would say to get him to change his mind and tells him he hasn't changed it. Well we take that as read says Curly but there is another reason why he hasn't taken Andy's name off the trainee list. Andy supposes that this is because he has great career in retail ahead of him. He informs Curly that he doesn't believe in all that anymore. Curly tells Andy the reason is a lot simpler than that. "You see, you'd make me look a pratt. I recommended you for that course and Head Office are going to say where is this high flyer? And I'm going to have to say on the hippy trail to Katmandu." Curly asks Andy to see his point of view and reconsider. Elaine appears and Andy takes his opportunity to escape. "Not a happy lad," remarks Elaine. "What did you say to him?" Curly tells her he thought he'd try some psychology. "But I'm not sure if it will work."

A tall stranger in a red motor cycle helmet enters the salon. "Pizzas for Osbourne." Denise tells him she didn't order Pizzas. "It says here . . " Denise denies. "They'll make me pay for them." Denise tells him that someone is playing 'silly beggers' and that she is sorry but they don't want any pizzas.

In the Rovers Bet is telling Des about the fashion shoot. "She's got a job?" "Well don't sound surprised." Des says he's chuffed for Raquel. Bet tells him in low tones that the name Armani has been mentioned. "She's waxed (lower tones) - everything." "Good for for her!" Des smiles. Bet further tells him that the shoot in in the old Fruit & Veg Market. Tanya (who has been earwigging this conversation) chimes in that they do fashion photos in really weird places. "Nowadays they do," says Bet, "you never saw Barbara Golen knocking about with a handcart."

Reg and Maureen enter. Maureen is reluctant to stay and tells Reg she doesn't want to drink so just say what he has to say. Overhearing this Bet quickly intervenes and persuades her to stop for at least one drink. Maureen slides into a bench seat and Reg quickly slides beside her. Mavis and Derek are nearby and Mavis starts gesturing to Derek that Reg and Maureen are there together. She doesn't want to say anything that might be overhead so she tries to remind Derek that Maureen broke up with Reg by acting out the story charade-style. She pretends to pull off a ring and throw it away. Derek is not good at charades. He sighs, "It's like being out with Marcel Marceau!"

Tanya approaches Des at the bar. She tells him she has heard about some of his "jokes" and confesses she also has such lapses. "Some people make it very tempting don't they?" Des agrees. Tanya moves close across the bar and tells him conspiratorially, "Now with me, it's Raquel." She whispers into Des' ear. "Listen, you'll like this. . . "

Over on the bench the estranged couple are still bickering. Bet brings their drinks over. Reg reminds Maureen that it's twenty-five years since they met. "Is it?" Maureen sounds surprised. She is even more surprised when Reg presents her with a silver bracelet and tells her that she is the only one for him and even if they can't make it work it's an anniversary worth celebrating. Maureen is gobsmacked.

So is Tanya when Des reacts to information she was whispering to him. "You're a COW! That's all I'm saying!" "Oh come on, I thought at least you would have a sense of humour!" Des leaves in disgust. This exchange is witnessed by Bet who looks very thoughtful. Over on the bench Reg helps Maureen with the bracelet catch.

The old Fruit & Veg Market is not in a very salubrious part of town. It is deserted and full of garbage. A lonely figure waits on the sidewalk. Some lads pass by and pass comments. Raquel looks at her watch. A car approaches. Is it a John? No thankfully it's Des in his shining armour come to rescue our deluded damsel. "What are you doing here Des?" He tells her to get in the car. "Well I'm on a job. I'm waiting. I hope I'm in the right place." Des tells her that there is no job. "That cow Tanya. She's having you on." The smile on Raquel's face freezes as the penny drops. She tries to maintain her dignity. "You know, I was just beginning to wonder. I was just thinking is this a leg pull or what?" Des tells her from where he's standing she's not the one who looks daft. Raquel gets in the car. "Armani they said," she says wistfully. Des picks up her bags and looking up his eye is caught by a sign above the empty shop where Raquel has been waiting. "I hate to be the one who tells you this," says Des, "but have you seen where you've been standing?" Raquel looks up at the shop. "R. Marney - High Class Fruit & Vegetables" Raquel's humiliation is complete.

Curly and Elaine arrive at his house with a take away meal. Elaine tells him she feels like a kid. She hasn't had take-out in ages. Apparently her ex-boyfriend was rather stuffy and thought take-out food was common. "You couldn't eat with your fingers or slip your shoes off with him around." "Why stop at your shoes?" Curly jokes as he ushers her inside. "Welcome to my humble lair."

The no longer estranged Reg and Maureen are now billing and cooing over each other. "So stupid," coos Maureen. "Such a waste of time," bills Reg. "I know," sighs Maureen fondling his shirt buttons. (I thought I'd mention that for the button fondlers amongst you. You know who you are.) Reg starts quoting about 'time's winged chariot drawing near' and Maureen observes that you're only young once and they aren't any more. "But some of us are young forever," Reg responds. "Oooo Reg!" They kiss.

Bet is wondering how Raquel is doing. Tanya responds she'll be halfway to Hollywood by now. "Well just you be glad for her," says Bet. "The girl's doing her best".

Over on the lovebirds bench things have deteriorated rapidly from the heights of Marvell's poetry to the "Young Ones". Reg and Maureen are giving an impromptu performance of Cliff Richard's not so classic song complete with backing music. This leads to a full necking session which is curtailed by Bet. Having exhausted the possibilities in their present locale Reg proposes that they leave. "Have you got anywhere particular in mind Reg?" Maureen giggles and there is more button fondling. (This scene was just classic Reg and Maureen. They were such a daft pair, but so believable. How we miss them.)

In Des' car outside the Rovers, Raquel is composing herself to return. She tells Des she's going go in and kill Tanya - but not with her mascara running. Des tries to dissuade her from fighting with Tanya in the bar. "Don't give her the satisfaction." Reg and Maureen appear from the pub. They are still singing. They are watched by Des and Raquel. Reg dangles his keys in front of Maureen. "Come with me - to Paradise." "Oooooo Reg!!!! Maureen squeals and they disappear into the night. Raquel tells Des that she'll be dignified but he thinks she might find that difficult under the circumstances. He offers to take Raquel anywhere she wants to go but she says she's not in the mood for anywhere.

In the mood is the order of the evening at Curly's. Elaine tells Curly she's still trying to get used to their improved relationship. Curly admits they have had their differences. "Well all's fair in love and war," says Elaine, "well war at any rate." "Well it's certainly war at Bettabuys Curly observes and pours the last of the wine(white) into her glass before he goes to make some coffee. Elaine tells Curly he's certainly better than Reg who basically doesn't seem to allow females to express any opinion whatsoever. Curly tells her he believes that a woman has just as much right as a man to express what's on her mind. Elaine takes him up on this offer. "Good. So when are you going to kiss me then?" Curly is fairly gobsmacked. Did he hear right?

In the Rovers, Derek observes to Mavis that they lead such a dull life. "What makes you say that?" "Well we've never gone out of the Rovers singing 'The Young Ones'." Mavis says Reg and Maureen were just showing their age. But that display of joie de vivre has ignited something in Derek. "Well you don't like to feel your missing out on something. Come on. Home." He chivvies her out of her seat and she follows him briskly out of the pub.

At Curly's lust is in the air also. A heavy necking session is in progress. Curly can't believe Maude's predictions are coming true. Unfortunately he can't keep his mouth shut or rather he can't stop words from pouring out of them. He tells Elaine "It's good to know that I did the right thing." "What was that?" He spills out that he reviewed her case and followed his instincts. "Goole never wanted you as much as I wanted you. I'm glad I did what I did." "Did what?" Between the kisses Curly tells her that he fixed it. "What, I'm going to Goole?" "No I fixed so you didn't go to Goole!" The kisses stop. "You SWINE!!" Elaine shrieks. And pushes him away and rushes out of the kitchen.

Des is putting out his order for the milkman. He looks up and sees Elaine rushing out of Curly's house putting on her coat as she runs up the street. Curly, in socks and shirt-tail hanging from his trouser catches up with her. "Elaine, you know why I did it!" "Yes and you're going to regret it for a very long time!" She pushes him out of her way has he hops on one foot trying to get his shoe on. Des grins at this spectacle. Elaine disappears round the corner of the Rovers. Curly reaches the corner. "Elaine!" he calls "Elaine"! As heart rending a sound as ever issued from the lips of Dustin Hoffman in The Graduate.

Libby Seekings

Customer NELLIE HANHAM Delivery Boy (Pizza) MARK CHARNOCK
Written By JULIAN ROACH Directed By DAVID PENN

Wednesday (3623, Monday 22 November 1993)

A phone is ringing. Denise, fresh out of the shower, races to answer it and gets the silent treatment from the caller. She slams the receiver down.

Reg is in a good mood as he leaves his flat. He sees Curly and lets him know that he and Maureen are back together and asks if Curly is still trying to stop Elaine's transfer. Curly says yes but it is only because it is good for the Weatherfield branch. Jim walks on by the two of them giving a good morning as he goes. Reg continues with the Elaine talk and asks what the two of them got up to. Curly tells him not much as he had told her that he was the one who was keeping her in Weatherfield and she was not pleased with that info.

Over at the salon, the postman drops quite a few things through the box. Denise comes down heading for the post when, again, the phone rings. Silent treatment on the line and she hangs up again. She goes for the post and seeing the pile, says 'what on earth?"

Andy lets Jim into his flat, makes a coffee for them and requests that Jim not ask how he is feeling. Jim says fair enough but admits that that is the reason behind his visit. He then asks Andy if he is having any thoughts of following Amy and Andy tells him no, not anymore. Big sigh of relief from Jim. After a bit of gobbledegook (which made me think he was speaking about his own life), Jim gets to the point and tells Andy to look at what he does have not what he doesn't - a new flat, a brand new career Andy stops him short by saying the career is out the window as is the flat. Jim is stunned and asks what Andy is going to do. Andy has no idea but he can't carry on as before as everything he was doing was for Amy. Jim tells him that he has no choice but to carry on in spite of what happened. Jim says he can understand about the flat but wants Andy to stop talking about walking off and asks him to go and live with either him or Liz. Andy tells Jim to stop worrying about him and Jim says that he's not, he's worried about himself. "Whaaat?" says Andy. Jim explains - he knows A has had it bad, everyone in their family hs had it bad. It's the divorce, Steve is due in court and then, Andy tells him he is just going to disappear. Jim's sorry but he just doesn't know how much more he can take. He asks Andy not to put more on the misery heap. Andy's not thrilled with the idea of staying to just please jim and Liz. Jim then tells him he is just trying to give him a reason to stay as Andy had said he didn't have a reason left to continue on. Jim says that he, Liz and Steve have troubles ahead while Andy can look at it as his troubles are behind him now.

Denise lets Fiona know that she had 2 more calls that morning and now, the post contains all sorts of things that someone has decided she may be interested in - double glazing, Caribbean cruise, insurance, conservatory and so on. Fiona says it's a little spooky but Denise thinks it is just pathetic. Denise wonders how a person can be so small-minded, cowardly and malicious to do this and how long this will go on.

At the Kabin, Rita asks if Mavis has her poem written yet. Mavis tells her that you don't just write a poem, you have to work and work at it until not one single word can be improved. Rita asks her if, after all that work, she will really stand up in front of the Rovers' crowd and read her poem for everyone to laugh at. Mavis asks why she thinks they will laugh and Rita just says she knows. Kevin walks in all suited up for the solicitor visit and buys a packet of mints. Mavis asks him why the visit there? Kevin says it is for their Friday court date over the car insurance business. The two ladies are duly sympathetic and wish him good luck.

Raquel and Tanya are battling over the wild goose chase. Tanya says that R sent herself on one if she thought Armani actually wanted to use her as a model. Tanya admits to being the one behind all of it and tells her she did it as she was sick to death about Raquel's nattering on how she is really a model and not just a barmaid. Raquel says she is but Tanya tells her she's not, she's just an over made up tart. Betty, who had just been listening in the background, steps in and blasts Tanya but Tanya continues. Tells Raquel that she had better get used to that fact as that is all she ever will be. In comes Bet asking what the ruckus is. R tells her what T did with the hoax model job. T again spouts off on her reasons behind it. Then, betty pops up with the info that she had been on the front cover of Newton and Ridley's 1978 mag, so really, she is a model as well! Bet says they all are in this job and if the two of them want to fight and carry on, do so outside of working hours. When they are behind that bar, there are no models, no barmaids only bloody ladies. R and T agree to this and Bet leaves, saying thank you <pause> ladies.

Bettabuys - Curly asks miss fenwick to the manager's office over the intercom as reg approaches Maureen. Reg tells her January 26th is the date at St. Christopher's. She screams in girlish glee and they clasp each other for a second before unclasping and checking to see if anyone saw that! Curly walks straight to miss fenwick and asks her if she didn't hear his announcement. She did but she was ignoring them. She then asks if he knows what he has done to her career. He really thinks he hasn't hurt it but she informs him otherwise. "Do you really think that missing out on promotion and being condemned to this back of beyond wouldn't matter? Just so a fraction of each day would be spent in your company?" She then tells him she has been in contact with head office and is getting her application forwarded on irrespective of what Curly said.

At the solicitor's - Steve and Kevin are relating what has happened as they see it. Steve admits to using Kevin's name and Kevin admits to being daft enough to go along with it. The solicitor says that, unfortunately, being daft isn't a defense and that they each have to decide whether they will plead guilty or not guilty. Steve says he is guilty but Kevin isn't. The solicitor then goes on to say that pleading not guilty will cost a great deal and they won't get legal aid as they are both working and if they win, they might get their costs back. He says that if they lose, they will get a substantially heavier sentence than had they pled guilty. Kevin says it sounds as though they should plead guilty but Steve says kev shouldn't. Kev says that they are guilty though and asks what they are liable to get - a first offense will probably get a sizeable fine and/or community service for Kevin. Steve is a different case as he already has a record for receiving stolen property and is told they will have to work very hard to keep him out of prison. Kevin is also told in here that he should get another lawyer to represent him as they are both facing different charges and is given a recommendation for another one.

Rover's - Kevin and Steve are telling Martin what the solicitor has told them. Steve figures he needs to get himself married with a load of children so the lawyer can say 'we can't send him to prison as he's a fine upstanding member of the community'. Martin tells him that sometimes, prison is more attractive an option than having the kids! Raquel informs Tanya that she guesses she should thank her for the trick she played as there was a really nice fellow that turned up and told her about the set up. He took her home and they had a nice evening together. "I think you know him - Des -lives just over the road." Tanya stews while R gloats!

Maureen is dashing around the aisles at bettabuys looking for Curly. She tells him a new wedding date has been set and she would like him to keep silent on what went on between the two of them. He assures her that he will keep mum. Miss fenwick comes up and tells him that she didn't get the job. She tells him that she won't lift one finger to help him run the store as he sabotaged her career. She then says that he never wanted a competent assistant but a bimbo so <fake smile> here she is!

Andy's at the café tucking into his plate while Alma is sweeping the floor. Liz arrives for a chat with him. She tells him that jim has brought her up to date and that it is all okay with her. Asks if he wants to go back to Uni but he says no. He is thinking of staying on at Bettabuys. He tells her he will be okay. She asks him where he will be living and he tells her not to push but he will get it sorted out himself.

Hospital - Steve is waiting for Alison, unbeknownst to her, when martin spies him there. Asks martin if he knows who she is but gets a no in response.

Andy visits Curly at home. Tells him he would like to keep the job if that's okay and that if the offer is still on, could he lodge there? Yes comes the answer

Rover's - Bet asks Tanya if the two ladies are all friends again "well, you have to feel sorry for someone who dresses as though she is a colour blind stick insect." Bet tells her she has a refreshing honesty about her but if she ever hears that honesty about her, Tanya will be out. Raquel smiles at this as Kevin and sally come in for a drink. Emily is babysitting for them. Raquel says that is nice as it lets them out every now and then. Kevin, the optimist, says he wants to enjoy his freedom while he can. Sally tells him not to even joke about it. Denise is telling Rita and Bet about the phone calls and the post she has been receiving. She asks if either of them have had anything similar happen but they haven't. Bet asks if she knows who is behind it but Denise doesn't. Rita thinks it could be someone who has just taken her name and number out of the phone book or an ad denise had placed somewhere. Then the two of them tell denise she is best off doing nothing about it , don't even lose her temper on the phone. If the person gets zero reaction, he/she just might get fed up and go away. Curly and reg come in for a pint. Reg asks Curly if he'll be best man again and gets a yes. Kev and Sal are still talking about the court date. He tells her that if anyone comes asking questions about him that she is to tell them nice things. She says she will say he is the most wonderful man in the world. It will take three weeks after the court date and social report to find out what sentence he will be given.

Steve is still in the waiting area at the hospital. Alison walks out, sees him and looks amazed but not too thrilled. She tells her mates to go on and she'll catch up. He tries to sweet talk her but she goes of after her mates. He yells after her as to when she gets off tomorrow. She goes around the corner without an answer but then, reappears, says ten o'clock and goes again. Big goofy grin for Steve!

Judith Cooper

Alison Rathbone - RACHEL SMITH Mr. Stapleton - NICHOLAS BLANE
Written by PETER WHALLEY Directed by JEREMY SUMMERS

Thursday (3624, Wednesday 24 November 1993)

We open in the Kabin. Rita and Ken discuss wayward Tracy. Ken leaves and Mavis decides that it's Deirdre she feels sorry for, all on her own and all. The discussion turns to the impending nuptials of Reg and Maureen. Rita, Mave and Raquel each offer up their opinions, Denise enters and adds her two cents worth.

At Bettabuys, Maureen asks Elaine for time off next January for the wedding. Elaine says she could not possible be entrusted with something as important as booking leave for the area manager's fiancée and steers Maureen in the direction of 'Mr. Watts' so he can approve Maureen's leave request.

A towel-headed Deirdre is about to get her hair cut at Denise's. She wonders aloud why she's bothering as she's no one to impress. Denise reckons they could both do with some cheering up and they arrange to have a girlie night out that evening.

Back at Bettabuy's Andy asks Elaine if he can swap his half-day from Friday to tomorrow. This is another decision that Elaine can't possibly make and tells Andy to go clear it with Mr. Watts instead. Andy knows she's just being facetious and all but tells her so and huffs off. Elaine, looking a bit remorseful, calls him back but he's already gone.

Kevin and Steve lunch in the café. They both ponder the upcoming court case and what will happen to them. Steve, ever the optimist, reckons they are going down and tells Kev to enjoy his lunch (a plate of grease from the looks of it) 'cause they don't have food like this in Strangeways'.

At No. 7, Curly is showing Andy the spare bedroom. Andy is going to be Curly's new lodger. Curly tells Andy to make himself at home and even offers up the use of his telescope and some astronomy books. Andy, sensing a close brush with nerddom, gives Curly a very polite 'thanks but no thanks' . Curly lays down the house rules, there are few. He sums it all up to courtesy and common sense - just like being married. Ooops! He apologizes for his gaffe. Andy tells him not to worry - he's just sick of people walking on eggs around him even if they mean well. Curly agrees and the housemates retire to the pub for a celebratory drink.

In the pub Bet asks Rita if she's having a crack at the poetry contest. Rita says she knows as much about poetry as Raquel does about nuclear physics.

"I know it's to do with the atomic bomb," retorts the Brain of Britain.

"Not just a pretty face," adds Bet.

Raquel continues. "I mean why do men have to invent things like that? Bet it weren't a woman who invented all those cruising missiles and exercise missiles neither."

Rita tries, sort of, to hide her amusement.

"Flippin' heck I only asked if Madame here had come up with a mucky limerick, how did you manage to drag me into star wars?" says Bet.

"It just annoys me when people go on like I've never had a serious though in me head," replies the Deep One.

Rita commiserates. "Do you know it's the same here flower? People just don 't think beauty and brains can go together."

"Oh," says Raquel, "did you used to be good looking then?" She turns to deliver a pint.

LOL - nice one Raquel!!

Reet grits her teeth. "There once was a girl named Raquel. They called her the barmaid from hell!"

Andy & Curly arrive in the Rovers. And sees Jim at a table and fills him in on his plans, staying at Bettabuys and moving in with Curly. Jim is a bit surprised at first but wishes Andy well.

At No. 1, Deirdre is doing her dishes. What's that? A noise at the front door, better go investigate! Well, it's Tracy, returned home and let herself in with her key.

Ad break.

We resume at No. 1 where Deirdre has slipped back in to Mum mode, making Tracy's lunch and generally fussing over her. Tracy explains that the landlord wanted the apartment back so gave her and Craig notice to leave. Tracy could have gone to stop with Craig at his mate's place but didn't fancy dossing on the floor so she came home. Deirdre is disappointed that the vile Craig is still on the scene but she does her best to disguise the fact.

Jim arrives at The Queen's to tell Liz about Andy. Like Jim, Liz is a bit disappointed but rationalizes it by saying that Andy is still the better off of the two boys. Andy's broken heart will mend but Steve's criminal record will be with him for life.

At Bettabuys Maureen has tracked down Curly to discuss her wedding leave. He tells her to discuss it with Elaine, as it's her department. Maureen tells him that Elaine said it wasn't up to her. "Oh did she?" asks Curly who goes off in search of Elaine leaving Maureen in mid-twitter about her wedding. Curly tracks down Elaine and they bicker some more about his blocking of her promotion. He says it was just because he couldn't bear to lose her. She responds that he can't lose what her never had and storms off. Their little exchange is overheard by Reggie who tries to be compassionate by telling Curly the path of true love never did run smooth and he and Maureen are living proof of that. Curly says if he has to wait for love until he's Reg's age, pot-bellied and balding he'll just go sign up at a monastery now!

Denise and Fiona are shutting up shop for the day. Denise is really unsettled by the prank phone calls and tells Fiona how much it bothers her. She comforts herself knowing that she'll have a few stiff drinks out with Deirdre that night. Fiona leaves and Deirdre walks in; she's come to ditch Denise in favour of Tracy for the evening. Denise understands but she is obviously disappointed.

In the pub, Bet asks Ken if he's taking part in the competition. Ken says he's not feeling very inspired right now. However, Rita decides to have a crack at it again.

There once was a landlady named Bet Who piled on the pounds when she 'et' They gave her a diet She said "Right cock I'll try it" And ended up falling down dead

(I'm not sure on the final word of the limerick; I listened to it about 10 times and could not make sense of it).

Denise comes in to the pub; Ken offers to buy her a drink. She asks if he's celebrating Tracy's return. He didn't know Tracy was back. Denise apologizes for letting the cat out of the bag. Ken doesn't mind at all, he' s just happy Tracy's come home and will go see her in the morning.

Steve loiters outside the hospital waiting for Alison. She sees him and is neither overjoyed nor surprised to find him there. She does, however, let him give her a lift home.

Denise returns home and barricades herself inside the apartment. She has a careful look around as if expecting someone to be lurking. She closes all the curtains and peeks in her bedroom then chastises herself for being so silly. A hot bath and a hot drink is what she needs she decides.

In the car Steve drills Alison about how she found out about his court case. Turns out she heard it from Martin Platt while chatting over lunch and realizing they both knew Steve. She's really not bothered about the whole thing. Steve invites himself upstairs 'for coffee' but she turns him down. She arranges to meet him the following evening.

A bathed and bathrobed Denise is getting ready for bed. The phone starts to ring; she lets it ring about 10 times before picking up. It's the mystery caller. Denise snaps and shouts into the phone.

"Whoever you are just knock it off! You're sick do you now that? People like you want locking up!"

She slams down the phone and crumples to the floor, sobbing.

End Credits

Tammy Mitchell

Alison Rathbone - RACHEL SMITH
Written By - ADELE ROSE Directed By - JEREMY SUMMERS

Friday (3625, Friday 26 November 1993)

The Salon is locked up tight this morning, Denise seems to have slept in. Fiona is hollering on the street for her instead of digging for her own key which she finally does when Bet arrives for her appointment. It might be noted here that when Fiona was still banging on the door, that Don Brennan, newly arrived home from night shift, called across to see if everything was all right. Fiona confirms that Denise is still getting funny calls as she lets the two of them in. Denise is roused by Fiona once inside and Denise confirms as well that the calls lasted half the night until she unplugged the phone. Bet is given a coffee while waiting for Denise and expresses sympathy for her new friend after her hair has been conditioned and up-done into a rather more elaborate 'do than usual.

Sally is walking around in a daze and haze of worry this morning. She sees Kevin off and smiles weakly across the road at Rita's greeting. Today is just a quick plead-guilty hearing and the sentencing will be in three weeks, just in time for Christmas, but the pressure is really getting to Sally. Martin has taken the kids for the day though Kevin hadn't wanted Sally to accompany him to court and she is at a loss what to do with herself. She finds herself in the Kabin in tears and Auntie Rita dispatches a dose of tea and sympathy as only a surrogate Mum could do. Poor Sally wishes she were a kid again and doesn't feel grown up enough to cope with all this. She sobs, wondering where the happy ever ending fairy tale went, illusions shattered.

Tracy is all sweetness and light to her mother this morning. Ken arrives on the doorstep to greet the prodigal daughter and everyone humours everyone else and it's all smiles and reassurances. Deirdre does inform Ken that Craig is most definitely still in the picture. More than she realizes. She comes home at dinnertime to find two large bin bags on the table and Craig lurking about the house, having let himself in with Tracy's key. His mate has relatives come so he couldn't stay there and Tracy offered for a few days. Deirdre hits the roof, realizing this was probably the plan all along but Craig manages to talk her round. Deirdre insists he is not sleeping with Tracy under her room and he smoothly says the right thing, he can respect that. That's when Miss Tracy arrives home to ask her mum a favour, probably figuring Craig will have already broken the bad news. (Speaking of which, we never see the front room of Number 1. What's in there? It can't still be Uncle Albert's bed because when Ken had that bad

Steve is lollygagging about, while Liz is urging him to get his skates on and get ready for court. Well there is plenty of time, Steve insists and picks up the ringing phone. It's for him and he lies to his mother when she assumes it's Vicky calling in support. In fact it's Alison doing the same and verifying their date for tonight. Steve reckons he'll be in need of a bit of nursing after today. He tells Liz he came in quite late the night before (seeing Alison I believe). An hour or so later, when they're all set to leave the Queens for court, who should show up but Vicky, intent on supplying Steve with a bit of nursing on his tough day. Steve swallows hard and pales, seeing his plans with Alison fly out the window.

Fiona makes Denise have a lie down but her rest is interrupted by a frantic scream up the staircase. Denise rushes down to find Fiona and Phyllis stood up on chairs and the Pest Control man there to investigate complaints about mice! Some time later, Fiona asks Denise if perhaps this trickster might be an old boyfriend or ex husband. Denise calls a mate of Neil's only to find out that Neil is in Australia so it isn't him. Her nerves stretched to the limit, she even accuses Fiona of having a joke on the boss but quickly apologizes.

Rita takes Sally to the Rovers for a drink at dinnertime. Bet is surprised to see Vicky and Steve come in but doesn't give Vicky any stick for skipping out on school. Kevin arrives shortly and he and Sally go back home for some quiet time. Vicky and Bet have a catch-up in the back before Vicky spends the rest of the day with Steve. Vicky asks Bet if she can come there for Christmas rather than go on a cruise with Alec. She cites too much travel already this year and a wish to be with Steve but Bet looks suspicious. Bet discusses her suspicions with Rita (not sure if this is short after or a few hours later). Just then Steve and a glum faced Vicky come through from the back. Steve is taking Vicky to the station to go back to school, coming over with a conscience and pretending to be shattered after the big (?) day he's had. Bet confronts Vicky, having sussed that Alec is taking another woman on his cruise. Vicky looks extremely uncomfortable and admits it's a different woman that he was seeing last time Be

Deirdre, Tracy and a card shuffling Craig are sat in front of the telly. Deirdre's yawning but refusing to go to bed until the other two while Tracy seems like she's waiting for Deirdre to go first but she leads the pack and goes to bed. Craig follows to his cot soon after so Deirdre can finally get ready for bed. She is downstairs in her dressing gown turning off lights when she hears creaking on the stairs and sees Tracy coming down and letting herself into the front room where Craig has obviously been waiting.

Bet and Rita have closed the pub and are at least 1 and a half sheets to the wind as they slag off Alec and his penchant for flitting from one woman to the next. They entertain the possibility of booking the same cruise as a Christmas surprise for Alec but scotch that idea. Rita invites Bet over for a further few nightcaps but Bet declines. Rita leaves, Bet locks up and surveys her kingdom. Alone.

Steve picks up Alison, the coast clear now that Vicky has gone back to school. Where to? She smiles. Oh right. (her place?)

Bet is ready for bed, hair down and satin matching nightie and wrap on. She sadly surveys her wedding photo and wedding ring, finally realizing Alec's true nature. "For better or for worse or for whoever comes along at the time, eh Alec?" she mutters. She puts the photo and ring in the drawer and closes it on her past. She makes her way up the stairs but her head is down in defeat and humiliation (realizing I think that Alec never really loved her and probably only wanted to get his hands on the pub) and she starts to sob as she slowly climbs the stairs.

Diane Johnston

Bob Cairns STEVE HALLIWELL Craig Lee KEIRAN O'BRIEN Alison Rathbone RACHEL SMITH
Written by PATREA SMALLACOMBE Directed by JEREMY SUMMERS


Originally transmitted: 29 November; 1, 3, 6 & 8 December 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 4 - Friday 8 September 2000
Episode Numbers: 3626 - 3630

Monday (3626, Monday 29 November 1993)

Vera collects the milk from the doorstep and is handed a letter by the postman. When she reads the envelope, her mouth drops open in surprise and she rushes inside. Jack is eating his bacon and eggs when Vera rushes in shouting excitedly, "it's from the Queen! It's from the Queen!" She's too excited to open it at that moment.

At the Kabin, Mavis gives Derek a preview of the poem she's written for the Rovers Poetry Contest.

Our Friend the Fox, by Mavis Wilton

There crouches he, frightened yet reviled.

Derek interrupts, criticizing "there crouches he", saying that "he crouches there" is easier to understand, whereas her phrasing is artificial. An irked Mavis suggests moving on to line 2.

"Her majesty is sorry to hear of the death of your father and offers her condolences at this very sad time", reads Vera's letter from the Queen. Jack has a look and is impressed by the posh writing paper, commenting on a water mark. "That's a tear stain," a touched Vera says.

Continuing with Mave's poem:

Shielded by bracken, the huntsman's horn sounds troola-loo, and thunders in his trembling heart.

"Do horns thunder?" Derek asks.

The yelp of dogs attacks the air. Closer the horn, louder the dogs, closer the horse's hammering hooves. Louder the clamor in poor Raynard's heart, 'til from his hiding, terror starts he out.

"You've done it again with starts he out," Derek interrupts, and suggests and 'improvement'. Mavis isn't interested in hearing any more literary criticism and decides that Derek won't be hearing the rest of her poem.

Craig plucks his guitar as Deirdre lays the table for breakfast. She tries to make conversation but he ignores her. He perks up when Tracy enters the room. Tracy has to go to work but it's Craig's day off. He continues to be rather rude to Deirdre when she asks him what he'll be having for breakfast. He plays part of a song and Deirdre comments that it was very good. Craig says she sounds surprised, which irritates Deirdre and she says she'll keep her mouth shut in future. Tracy snidely comments that Deirdre hasn't got past the Beatles. (personally I'd throw them both out on their ear, the ungrateful...)

At the salon, Rita makes a hair appointment and is invited to the birthday party that Denise is throwing for herself on Wednesday night. The phone rings, and Denise tenses. She asks Rita to answer it, then quickly realizes that's not appropriate and apologizes. She picks up and is relieved to hear a customer on the other end.

Vera and Tommy leave the Duckworth home. Don is outside washing his cab and agrees to run them to the prison in about 10 minutes. Vera tells Don about Terry's imminent release -- "for good behaviour. Of course, that's RTerry all over." An amused Don says "yeah". Vera asks Don if he can put in a word for Terry at work, but Don says he can't recommend anyone with a criminal record. Vera tries to convince him to put in a word anyway, but Don refuses, even when Vera really lays on the guilt -- "for Christmas, for RTommy". She tells Don he's "just lost a fare!"

At the Rovers, Denise invites Bet to her party. Jack invites himself. Steve wants to eat a sandwich he's brought in with him, but Bet tells him that if he must, to eat it in the gents. She refers to him as the "golden boy", and tells Raquel while looking at Steve, "Vicky's given up a chance for a cruise just so she can be with him this Christmas." Steve would rather not have Vicky in his hair over Christmas and suggests to Bet that she have a word with her as "Christmas won't be much fun for her around here." Bet instantly twigs that Steve wants to be a free agent over the holidays. Steve denies it, but Bet has his number.

Vera shows Terry the letter from the Queen. Terry isn't impressed, telling her that it's a standard letter, but Vera doesn't believe him. She talks about Christmas and waxes philosophically about Terry's imprisonment and what a wonderful Christmas they'll have -- "heaven".

Deirdre comes home at lunch to find Craig and Tracy on the sofa watching telly, Tracy in a bathrobe and nothing else. "You should be at work!" Deirdre exclaims. Tracy claims she's not feeling well and that she's called in sick. Craig asks if there's a problem, and Deirdre reiterates that they're in her house and have to live by her rules. Craig offers to leave, but Deirdre won't give him the satisfaction. She tells Tracy to get to bed -- alone -- and that when she returns after work, she wants no evidence that they've seen each other (read slept together). Tracy and Craig look amused after she's stormed out.

Over a drink before the poems are due to be read, Mavis tells Derek that her confidence has been shattered by his criticism of her poem. Bet tells Ken that only Phyllis, Mavis, and Derek have entered the contest and that she's disappointed that Ken didn't enter. Deirdre comes in and fills Ken in on her run-in with Craig and Tracy. Ken reminds her that she doesn't have to put up with it, but Deirdre has realized that Craig and Tracy are a package. Throwing out Craig would mean throwing out Tracy, and she's not willing to do that. Ken thinks she's doing the right thing. She admits that she was stupid to go home when she knew Tracy would probably be skiving off work. They both agree that Craig is very cool in demeanor. Jack tells Don about Denise's party, assuming that Don has been invited. Don says it's his birthday on Tuesday (tomorrow). Jack says Denise probably hasn't got around to inviting him yet, but Don claims he isn't bothered. Back to the Wiltons, Mavis wants to hear Derek's poem. Here we go:

Mavis, my Marilyn.

She was a legend of her time, nations applauded, whole continents were in her thrall. The world resounded with the name, Munroe. There was another goddess, of flesh, not celluloid, in Weatherfield, not Hollywood. One who, for me, outmatched, outshone, and yes, outlived, Munroe. Who needs the silver screen, when I have the silver in her hair. Who needs the wind-blown skirt when I can nightly gaze upon the lifting hem of my own personal Munroe. Her breasts are downy --

"I beg your pardon!" Mavis interrupts. "It's adult company and it's 1993," Derek says. "I can say breasts." "Yes, but you're talking about me," Mavis protests. Derek continues,

Her breasts are downy, like the peach--

"Peaches are hairy!" Mavis wails. "If you read that out loud, I shall shout, I shall heckle, I shall throw something!" Derek tells her that the poem is flattering and "damn good", and only a moron couldn't see that. He mocks Mavis' poem. "Mockery is the lowest form of wit," Mavis says. "That's all I expect from you -- pornographer!" she hisses.

Jim drops in on Andy to give him some mail. He asks Andy why he's living with Curly. "It's cheap, I'm independent, I'm away from my parents," is Andy's reply. They decide to pass the evening together, but not at the Rovers because it's poetry night. Andy leaves to fetch a take-away and some cans.

Don spots Denise at the bar and rushes over to say hello, hoping for an invite to her do. He tells Denise that it's his birthday tomorrow, but she doesn't bite and there's no invite on offer. Steve says goodnight to Bet, saying he's leaving because "it's poems". Bet, who thinks the contest is a crazy idea, says she can't argue with that. After he's gone, she tells Rita that she's sure Steve has a girl somewhere and she feels for Vicky. Rita suggests that Bet write a poem about it, and earns a dirty look. Bet reluctantly, but with a smile, announces that it's time for poetry night. Phyllis crosses over to Percy and reads her poem aloud.

Ode to Percy

Percy wants to leave, but the patrons and Bet tell him to stop. Phyllis tells him to "stand there and take it like a man."

When God made Percy, he was smiling. He took two lusty arms and took two sturdy legs and he stuck them on the body of my darling.

(much laughter)

But I think God was balmy, he made him join the army. When he cooked the meals for the soldiers, nobody was bolder. He cooked curry under fire, and became my heart's desire.

(much aaawing...)

He's got a bird called Randy, and he's not the only one.

(Phyllis playfully slaps Percy's face)

He's always got a smile,

(Much guffawing)

and if he wants to, I'll run a mile, And if he wants to buy me flowers, he can do it any day, And if he wants to misbehave with me, I won't stand in his way.

(Much laughter)

Bet calls for Mavis and Derek, but they both decline, Derek saying that in this age of censorship, his poem hasn't made it past the Lord Chamberlain, and Mavis saying that hers isn't good enough, and offends poetic sensibilities. The Wiltons exchange poisonous glances. Bet declares Phyllis the winner and hands her an envelope containing 25 quid. Phyllis says she'll buy her "inspiration" a drink, and Percy agrees to accept it "by her way of apologizing." "Don't you just love it when he's coy," Phyllis laughs. The credits roll.

Sarah Ettritch

Tom Duckworth - DARRYL EDWARDS Craig Lee - KIERAN O'BRIEN
Written by - STEPHEN MALLATRATT Directed by - BRIAN MILLS

Tuesday (3627, Wednesday 1 December 1993)

The postman drops a bunch of mail through the Salon letter-box. On the other side of the door Denise, in her dressing gown, stops combing her hair and goes to pick them up. She thumbs through the envelopes casually then drops them on the counter unopened and proceeds to go upstairs. The phone rings. She pauses, turns and looks at the phone. Then she continues upstairs.

In the Rovers' living room Bet and Raquel are drinking tea. Raquel can't decide what to wear for Denise's birthday party. She asks Bet what she's going to be wearing. Bet suggests sou'wester, wellies and a lampshade. From her tone she could care less. Raquel isn't quite sure what to make of this answer and wonders if she has put her foot in it. "She has invited you?" "Oh yes," replies Bet in a weary tone. "But I'm not sure I'm going." Bet tells her that someone has to keep the pub open. Raquel is sure the party won't get lively until after closing time. "Well I'm not sure I'm in the mood for parties anymore." Bet is surprised to hear herself say that. "Anyway it'll only be the same people that prop my bar up every night of the week." Raquel is more optimistic. "Maybe you'll meet Mr. Right." World weary Bet informs Raquel that she has already met Mr. Right - seven or eight times. Raquel tells her it's never too late for Romance. Bet begs to differ and tells Raquel to go to the party and have a good time. She asks if Des is taking her. Raquel feigns indifference as she studiously files her nails. "Doesn't bother me whether he takes me or not." Bet tells her that if she could still tell lies like that with a straight face then she just might feel like going. It seems as if Bet is just as depressed as she was last night. She tells Raquel that Denise needs some happy faces at her party. "Whereas me, if someone said a kind word to me I think I might just burst into tears."

Fiona bursts into the Salon apologizing for her lateness. "I did try to phone." Denise tells her she was in the bath. "Anyway," Fiona beams, "here's your card." Fiona wants to know where the rest of Denise's cards are and receives the answer that Denise hasn't got around to opening them yet. Fiona says she usually can't wait to open anything she gets. "Well to tell the truth, I can't help wondering if there's anything nasty in one of these. From whoever it is who's getting some sort of kick out of . . you know." Fiona is sorry. She forgot about that possibility. "No it's me! I'm getting scared of my own shadow! Which is just what he wants, I suppose," Denise reasons with herself. Denise is sure the mystery harrasser is a 'he'. Fiona says it could be a woman. Maybe someone who's jealous of Denise. Denise tells her whoever it is, when she finds out who's badgering her, they won't know what hit them. She sets to work on the mail.

It is later in the day and outside the yellow door of number 9 Doreen Horton waits for Jeff to join her. "Better let me do the talking," she tells her husband. "You'll only put their backs up!" Jeff protests that he won't. "That little lad means as much to me as he does to you."

Don hauls his duff leg out of his taxi. He sees Denise outside the Salon and goes over to her and wishes her a Happy Birthday. Denise thanks him for his card and asks him how he knew it was her birthday. "I don't remember telling you." Don flusters for an answer and then admits he heard people talking about her party and put two and two together. "And you're coming tonight?" "If I'm invited." Denise says she'll put him down as a definite. "Oh and by the way, I've invited Ivy." Not what Don wanted to hear. "You're not serious?" Denise is puzzled. "Why not? I've invited all my neighbours."

Vera is showing Tommy a photograph of his Daddy. There is a knock at the door. Vera is very surprised to see Doreen and Jeff. Doreen is all smiles. "I can see your Granny's taking very good care of you!" Vera is still speechless. "Do you mind, if we come in?" Doreen asks stepping over the threshold.

In the Rovers, Tanya pours an orange juice for Don and asks him if he is going to Denise's party. "Mind your own business," he growls at her. "Aw didn't she invite you? I thought she'd invited everybody." Don ignores her remarks and tells Jack that he's just seen the Hortons going into his place. Jack thinks it would be prudent to find out what's going on and asks Bet for some time out. "We'll struggle on without you." She sarcastically grants his request.

Jack rushes out past Phyllis and Percy. Phyllis is still basking in the glow of her poetry contest win. She remarks to Percy that she bets he's the only chap round here that's had a poem written about him. Percy mutters "I wouldn't know. . " Raquel who is picking up glasses chimes in that it's a wonderful compliment. She would be thrilled if someone wrote a poem about her. "But then I suppose you have to have the inspiration," she sighs and wanders off. Percy is sceptical. He doesn't know what the fuss is about. "It's only stringing a few words together." Phyllis asks him if he could write a poem about her. She would love to see that. "I know. That's why I shan't be doing it!" retorts Percy as he strides off in the direction of the Gents. Phyllis sighs. 'How to entice a man' Tip # 347 has failed.

At the Duckworths, Doreen is cooing over RTommy when Jack bursts in. He makes some pleasant noises about sitting down and cups of tea but the Hortons decline. As Doreen further fusses over Tommy, Jeff tells Jack and Vera they are invited to spend Christmas in Blackpool. "We thought Tommy could have a nice family Christmas with all his relatives." Jack makes more pleasant noises but Vera tells him they have plans. Jack appears to have forgotten that RTerry is due out of clink and he persists in pleasant noises until Vera is forced to actually spell it out to the Hortons that Terry is being released. "I don't suppose he'd be welcome at your house." Vera supposes right. "I mean, you didn't even want him in family." Doreen's face falls. She hadn't bargained on this. "Oh we didn't realize. . ." "So you see Tommy will be having a nice family Christmas - with his Daddy." Vera is triumphant. Jeff sees the score. "Come on Doreen we did our best." Jack tries to smooth things by suggesting that they can always visit but Vera forges on. "Well that's up to our Terry. I mean, he's hardly likely to want Tommy with that lot. Them as called him trash." Vera feels she doesn't have to be nice to the Hortons anymore. Jeff calls his wife to leave before anything else is said.

Outside in the car a disappointed Doreen concedes to her husband that he was right. "It was a waste of time coming here." Jeff is not so sure. "They're letting m'laddo out of prison. Now that's something we didn't know."

In a quiet corner of the Queens, Deirdre is bending Liz's ear about her troubles with Tracy. Liz tells her the bright side is that Tracy is back. "Yes. I just wish she hadn't dragged her boyfriend back with her!" Deirdre tells Liz she has a hard time accepting that Tracy thinks she is old enough to do what ever she wants. But if she lays the law down Tracy will be off. Liz makes sympathetic noises and says it must be different with girls. When her boys started seeing girls she felt it was inevitable. Deirdre doesn't want Tracy hurt or her life ruined. "But she's bound to have boyfriends," counters Liz. Deirdre wishes Tracy didn't have this one. According to Deirdre, Craig is a selfish, arrogant yob. "But Tracy thinks he's Mr. Wonderful. And now they're in my house. It's like sharing a caravan with a honeymoon couple!"

Gail puts a grilled meal down in front of Don and tells him he's getting to be one of their best customers. "Ivy not feeding you?'" Don tells her Ivy is still at work. He thought he would get a bite to eat and work the evening taxi shift. Gail goes back to the counter and suggests to Alma that she leaves early so she can get ready for Denise's party. Alma says she'll hang on because she and Mike won't be getting there early. Alma is not even sure Mike really wants to go. "I think Denise baffles Mike. He says 'there she is, a good- looking woman, why hasn't she got a fella'?" Gail answers, "That is a very good question." Alma confides that Denise has dropped hints that she does have an admirer but he's married. "And apart from that, she doesn't fancy him anyway!" Alma and Gail giggle over this while Don, who has been eavesdropping ever since the name Denise was mentioned, sits stone-faced over his sausage and chips.

In the Rovers Sally and Kevin are preparing to leave. Alma asks Jack what the Websters are drinking. "Now why are you buying the Websters a drink?" demands Mike. Alma reels off a list. Not much money, nice couple, must be worried about the court case. None of these reasons impress Mike as justification for buying someone a drink. He comments that he hopes Kevin's problems won't interfere with his work. "You're all heart, you," says Alma and takes the drinks over to Sally and Kev. Kevin is wary but Alma tells him Mike sent them over. "For all the good work you've been doing in the garage." Sally shouts her thanks across the room and Mike is not backward in taking the credit for his wife's gesture. Kevin remarks that Baldwin likes to be flash with his money in the pub. "Just you try and get a extra pound on your wages." Kevin is sure Mike has someone lined up to do his job if the court case goes against him. Sally tells Kevin not to think like that. "I'm praying. I'm praying every day that everything's going to be all right."

At the birthday party, Audrey, Deirdre and Jim toast Denise. Deirdre asks Audrey where Alf is. "Three guesses," says Audrey. Deirdre gets it in one. "Council Meeting!" Ivy appears and Denise greets her. "Didn't Don come with you?" Ivy tells her she hasn't seen Don since this morning and he was out when she got home from work. "Typical man." trills Audrey. "They're only happy when they're working!"

Don is no longer at work. He is in the Rovers. "I've locked the cab up and chucked the keys away," he tells Jack. "So keep the ale coming 'til I fall over." Don is going to drown his sorrows. Bet casts her experienced eye over the room. She tells Raquel she can leave for Denise's party. Des is standing by for Raquel. Tanya pipes up, "What about me?" Ready for a confrontation, she is quickly de-fused by Bet and also given leave to go. Tanya asks Des to escort her as well, much to Raquel's annoyance. Des says a pretty girl on both arms will make him feel like a sandwich. Raquel wants to know what type of sandwich. Des keeps the party clean by answering "You have to ask? Beef." "More like barmcake," hisses Tanya to Des under her breath. Ever watchful Bet asks Jack what Tracy Barlow is drinking. Jack replies he doesn't know as he didn't serve her. When questioned Tracy admits it's lager. "I drink it all the time at home." Tracy is defiant. Bet reminds Tracy she is under age and could cost Bet her license. Craig tells Bet they were just going anyway and Bet gives him the 'I've Marked Your Card Laddie' look. Fiona suggests they go to the party with her.

Jack asks Don if he is going to Denise's party. Emphatic "No!". Jack asks if he was invited. Don tells him yes but Denise also invited Ivy. "Which is why I'm not going!"

The party is in full swing and Ivy is busy gathering up the used paper plates. Raquel wants to know if Des is going to dance with Tanya. "I don't know, why?" "Because!" Des tells her it's difficult when attractive girls fancy him. "You don't think she's attractive do you?" asks Raquel in tones that clearly say she doesn't. Des tells her not half as attractive as she is. Raquel concedes that Des may dance with Tanya - if she asks him. Deirdre laments to Audrey that her main reason for coming to the party was to get away from Tracy and the awful Craig - and here they are at the same party! Audrey says that Craig doesn't look that bad. "Oh maybe it's just me," sighs Deirdre. "Perhaps I'd take a dislike to anybody Tracy brought home." Jim asks Denise where her ex is now. Denise replies, "He's supposed to be in Australia, but I'm not so sure." (Is this a clue to the identity of the harrasser?) Jack arrives and tells Denise there is a taxi downstairs waiting for her. Denise goes down to the street and approaches the cab. The driver tells her that someone called Osbourne ordered the cab earlier in the evening to go to the hospital. Denise tells the driver emphatically that she did not order a taxi. "Well somebody did!" says he replies, driving away. Denise watches him go. Another hoax!

The Rovers is nearly empty and Don and Bet are talking at the bar. Don has got to the maudlin drunk stage. He asks Bet if she has ever thought when dropping off to sleep, "I'm not much bothered if I don't wake up again." Bet says "Not up to now, thank God." Don tells her she has has more guts than he has to soldier on and not complain about what life's done to her. She tells him that life is not a bowl of cherries but it's a lot better than the alternative. Don says if he was not here it would not make a blind bit of difference to any one. Bet tells him it's a good job he didn't go to the party as he's not exactly in the mood for one. Don asks her to have a drink with him and she agrees but the drinks will be one her. Bet tells Don she finds him and Ivy, as a couple, are a bit of a puzzle. Don, in confidence explains the arrangement that he and Ivy have. He won't leave home and she won't drink herself to death. Bet shakes her head. "What the hell do either of you get out of that?"

Back at the party, Ivy is still taking care of the garbage and the washing up. Mike wants to go but Alma wants to dance so they stay. Jack and Tanya are dancing together and Jack thinks he is doing OK when Tanya tells him his dancing is as good as his singing. "All I need is a flight of stairs and a silver topped cane," he tells her. "There's no answer to that Jack." Fiona informs Denise there is another taxi downstairs. Denise can't believe it. "Whoever is doing this I will swing for them! Someone is doing their best to drive me daft!"

Don and Bet are still discussing Life. They seem to have some common ground between them. Bet chivvies the lovers languishing in the corner. "Come on, I've got a bed to go to." Bet tells Don that it's not just him. She has been feeling pretty much depressed today as well. Don tells her she's too young to feel that way. "You're still a good looking woman, no codology. Whereas me, I'm damaged. It's all downhill to the finish." Bet tells him it doesn't have to be like that. "You have to fight it all the way whether it makes sense or not." Bet lets the lovers out and Don finishes his drink. He tells her he's really enjoyed talking with her. Bet locks the door and turns to face him. "Have another drink." Don says he thought she wanted to go to bed. Bet tells him that you have to say that to get the 'ale cans' out of the place. She pours him a scotch. "Anyway, it's true. I do have a bed to get to." She smiles knowingly. "Come through to the house. Bring your drink with you." Don slowly realizes what Bet is offering. He goes through to the house and Bet follows.

Libby Seekings

Craig Lee KIERAN O'BRIEN Jeff Horton DICKEN ASHWORTH Doreen Horton ANNIE RAITT
Written By JOHN STEVENSON Directed By BRIAN MILLS

Wednesday (3628, Friday 3 December 1993)

With a look round to make sure the coast is clear, Don heads out the front of the Rovers' and goes home.

As Denise is picking up after the party, Raquel is telling her the way to prevent a hangover - don't get sober! From the looks of it, Raquel is on for one nasty headache. The phone rings and Raquel answers it. She tells the silence that "either you're talking too quiet or I'm much drunker than I thought I was" and asks if Denise can hear anything. Denise gets on the phone and tells him to be quiet (lol) and just listen. She then screams into the phone and asks if that is what the caller wants. The caller hangs up. Raquel asks if Denise has any tomato juice for a Bloody Mary to make her feel better. She then tells Denise to come over to her place where she will fix them up for the both of them.

Jack, a tad worse for wear, asks Vera if she really needs to tap Tommy's egg open. Vera tells him that they don't make screw top eggs. She then tells him that he is to stop at home as she has shopping to do. Jack doesn't feel up to it but it convinced through her chatter that that is what he is going to do. Vera then offers Jack a touch of her sherry she got for the Christmas trifle to sort out his head.

Denise and Raquel are talking with Bet (who looks radiant) in the back of the Rover's. Bet tells them there is only one cure for the hangover, cracks an egg into the glass and presents them with "the prairie oyster". Raquel tells her she doesn't fancy a fry up for breakfast but is told it is for drinking raw. Denise says that just the thought of it has cleared her head up and Raquel goes off to have one of her dizzy spells. Denise tells Bet about the things that went on during the party. Bet tells her to get a whistle and the next tine he/she calls, blow it down the phone. Denise has a grin at that saying he could tell who it was then, whoever was holding their ear. Bet is a bit puzzled by that as she thought Denise felt it was an ex of hers and besides, all the neighbours were at the party. Not Don says Denise and tells Bet that their relationship is a bit iffy right now. Denise goes on about Don and how he doesn't stand the slightest chance with her and why couldn't some people just give up with some dignity. Bet, who looks rather contemplative here, tells her that people can desperate even at her age. Denise smiles and says yes but not that desperate, eh? Bet doesn't answer that but gives a small nod and a half hearted smile. Denise leaves then and Bet downs the raw egg.

Steve is at the hospital and spies Alison with a male, a rather attractive young male. He watches for two seconds, throws out the flowers he had and goes off to his car. He drives away in a sulky roar.

Joe (Jonathan's Dad) is at Denise's. Seems there has been an anonymous tip to Inland Revenue that she hasn't been filling out her returns properly. He tells her that these things usually end up being from a neighbour or an employee with a grudge but he is obliged to follow up the tip.

Jack has had Tommy's hair cut by Fiona as a surprise for Terry's homecoming and as a surprise to Vera. Joe and Denise come down from upstairs and bump into Jack. He recognizes Joe and Denise tells him that Joe works for Revenue. Jack's smile fades a tad as he bumbles a bit with the explanation of how he is going to work but he means that he is working with Tommy at home, looking after him. He dashes out the door! Joe is used to this effect and takes it in stride. The phone rings. As Fiona answers it, Joe lets Denise know her books are in order. Fiona hands the phone over to Denise, who tells them both to cover their ears and then lets loose with a whistle blast over the phone. Joe asks what all that was a bout and Denise tells him that was the anonymous tip.

Dierdre has Ken over for a meal. She needs to chat about Tracy and her life. Talk goes from Uncle Albert to marriage and how she feels that she has had the chances but she is not the type to have it work out. Ken tells her that their marriage break up was more his fault and as Dierdre places her hand on his, in walks Craig. Dierdre is not pleased with his arrival nor with how he admits that he admires them for being civilized about their divorce.

At a club, Steve is watching Alison and her male friend. She sees him and comes over. He asks her if that is her ex. Robert? You're joking, he's a mate from work. She knows exactly what Steve is up op as she then tells how her ex used to be a really jealous type, watched her like a hawk, didn't like her having male friends and how she thought it was so immature and doesn't Steve agree with that? He readily agrees with her. She tells him that she knew he would be different as he is soconfident. So, how did he know where she was? A lucky guess says Steve. And why didn't you bring me any flowers she asks. I don't want you to think I'm smothering you is Steve's reply and she grins at that.

Craig and Ken are having quite a good chat over serial monogamy. Dierdre is still really stroppy and tells Craig a few home truths. She tells him that she wanted to discuss things with Ken but she now has to be back at work in 10 minutes. He says he should have thought and she agrees with that. She also tells him she minds his having a key to her front door. He hands it over and heads off. Ken is surprised at how bright Craig is and thinks he should have stayed in school. Dierdre could give a toss about that and says she just wants to talk about her. To be made as though she still exists and matters. Ken apologizes and says he was just surprised by Craig's intelligence. She apologizes for it but he says of course, he wants to talk to her. He says that no matter who else comes and goes, she will always have him.

Rover's - Don asks where Bet is as he has been asked there and while waiting for Bet, Denise tells him she is putting two and two together. Asks him what he was up to last night. He is confused until she talks about pizzas, taxis He asks her what she takes him for and she tells him - a frustrated old man. Don is about to tell Denise what he was up to last night when Bet appears and orders him into the back. She goes off to join him and Raquel wails that she can't be left in there on her own. Bet says this will not take a minute. Vera comes in and Raquel hopes she has brought Jack in with her. Vera asks to put the parcel for Tommy under the bar so Jack can bring it home. She tells Raquel that she has time for a quick drink but Raquel says no and covers up the taps. She has had enough and can't do anymore until Jack gets there. Bet and Don are in the back room. She wants zero to find out what went on the night before. She also tells him that she hopes that all Denise expects is true is a pack of lies as Don says it is. She tells him that the night before was a one off - something she thought was between two grown up, lonely people who knew where each stood and no harm would come of it. Don agrees with her but she roars at him that she doesn't know him and doesn't think that even he knows where he stands. He denies all this Denise stuff saying she's wrong and if you're looking for someone with a grudge against Denise Bet stops him saying it is him she is talking about and that he is lost and doesn't know where he is going. Don't you think I know that? replies Don. Bet tells him she knows he has a rough time of it but he has to deal with it. Don asks her how he should do that - grow another foot? start life all over but leave Ivy out of it? or to just take a short cut into next life and hope it is a better one? Bet angrily tells him not to talk like that. She tells him she doesn't know what she would do in his situation but she does know that you don't take it out on other people - not Denise, not Ivy and most definitely not her as if he tries it, she will be back on the phone to Ivy but she won't pretend that all she wants is a cab. Mike walks into the Rover's where everybody is asking Raquel to serve but she keeps saying no. Vera runs into him and asks if he has anything for him - yes a bit of advice, don't ask him for a job as he won't get one. Vera turns on him and tells him she'd like to see Mike behave himself in Strangeways as he can't even behave himself on his own doorstep.

And speak of the devil, Terry is being visited by Jeff Horton. Jeff begins with congrats on Terry's getting out but Terry pushes past the falsities and tells him to get to the point.

Vera is home and tells Jack to get over there and fast. She likes Tommy's haircut and is looking forward to a family Christmas.

Jeff tells Terry that Vera and Jack's isn't the place to bring up a baby and Terry knows it. The Horton's place has everything a child needs. Terry tells him that there is more to life than money. Jeff agrees but says it makes life easier and poor little Tommy is a handicap for Terry. He then says that if Terry plays things his way, Jeff could take the handicap off his hands and give terry a head start. What sort of head start says Terry. Figures can be negotiated but a lot of money - a sum to be paid every year until Tommy is 18. This could make all the difference in the world, says Jeff, it could allow terry to make himself into a dad Tommy could be proud of. A twitch and a gleam in Terry's eyes as the credits begin to roll.

Judith Cooper

Written by FRANK COTTRELL BOYCE Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Thursday (3629, Monday 6 December 1993)

It's morning at No. 1. As she's leaving for work Deirdre discovers Craig at the dining table with the paper and a cup of tea. Lucky him, he's got the day off! Deirdre wonders - does this mean Tracy has the day off too? Craig says she went to work. Deirdre reckons Tracy will probably return home at 10:00 with a headache then. Craig says no, she'd probably take an aspirin or something for a headache. His 'humour' is lost on Deirdre who tells him if he's going to sit there all day the least he could do is make that evening's tea.

At the Rovers, Raquel is on the phone with Clint (her agent?) confirming that she has definitely been booked to work at the Duffield International company Christmas party that afternoon.

In the Bettabuys staff room, Andy reads aloud a memo regarding staff behaviour at the upcoming Christmas party. There is to be no alcohol abuse, no unseemly behaviour, no debauchery and no skiving off work the day after because of a hang over. Andy questions whether this is a party or a church service. Elaine assures him it is a party - and there might even be ice cream, jelly and a rousing game of hunt-the-thimble too! Andy sniggers. Curly turns up and says he hopes the staff will act upon his guidelines. "Might even be spat upon," mutters Elaine.

Raquel is at Denise's' having her hair done in honour of the posh Chrissie party later on. She tells Denise how she's been hired to be party hostess and they are even sending her over a fancy gown to wear. She adds that she' s had to recheck all her bookings because she had a few hoax calls. This gets Denise's' attention and she asks if Raquel has any suspects. Raquel replies she knows, for a fact, that it was Tanya Pooley who, in her opinion, is not very nice.

Steve is alone in the factory printing t-shirts. Craig comes looking to have some shirts printed up and how much will it cost? He assumes there are two price tiers one if he goes through Mike another if Steve does it on his own time. Steve doesn't disagree!

In a very festive looking Kabin, Mave remarks to Emily that she has a very nice Christmas to look forward to thanks to Mr. Sugden. Emily is a bit confused but Mave goes on, he has lots of plans for dinner, is ordering a turkey and generally seems to be happy organizing it all. Such a change from his normally grumpy demeanour. Rita reckons it's because he's been visited by ghosts of mess sergeants past!

Vera comes in looking for bin liners. She's off to clean out her Dad's flat.

Alison arrives in the pub looking for the T-shirt shop and is given directions by Tanya.

Percy is busy relaying his Christmas plans to Betty. Turkey is about to be ordered and the pudding was made a month ago. So, there should be no need for Emily to get stressed out over the preparations but if she does it's no fault of his!

Denise and Jack have a chat at the bar. There is a box for Raquel - her posh frock - on the bar in front of them. Tanya makes a predictably snide remark and says she's off out for a moment. Denise notes that Tanya is quite hostile towards Raquel. Jack reckons its because Tanya is jealous.

Alison has found Steve and the two are snogging in the factory. Tanya pokes her head in, catches them mid-smooch and says "Oh, I see you found him love then."

In the back room at the Rovers, Raquel stares at her reflection in the mirror, she looks crushed. She's tried on her posh frock. It's green with red trim and pom-poms down the front. Looks like it was purchased at Elf Emporium or Clowns R Us. To add to the humiliation there is a sign on the back, it reads 'Santa's Little Helper.'' (I'd be upset too if I had to go to a party dressed like the Simpson's dog!). She sits down at the table, puts her hands to her face and quietly cries. Awwwww.

Betty also informs Emily what a great Christmas she's going to have, all Percy's plans etc., etc. Emily is rather amused to have the same conversation twice in one day. In Percy's defence, Betty tells Emily he just wants to save her from any undue stress. "Hmm, he hasn't considered moving out!" says Em. (I do love her dry wit).

Jack, Betty and Tanya discuss Vicky's impending return for the hols. Betty reckons Steve is the reason she comes back for all her holidays. "Oh, is that still on then?" asks Tanya innocently.

As Rita leaves the pub Reg corners her and asks to escort her back to work. Rita says OK, but no funny stuff!

Raquel, with her coat buttoned to her neck, tries to sneak out the back door but is sprung by Jack who wants a peek at her fancy ball gown. Raquel tries to leave but Jack convinces her to let him have a look. She unbuttons her coat and reveals her elf-clown dress. Jack, bless him, tells her it's beautiful. Tanya slithers by, laughing hysterically, and says no it looks like the sort of thing you wear to sit on a toadstool. Raquel, on the verge of tears, screams at her to shut up and storms from the pub. Tanya continues to bray. Jack turns to her and says, "You know summat Tanya, there's a funny side to you." (I was hoping he'd say, "You know Tanya you' re a vitriolic, malicious bitch and I hope something heavy falls on you." Oh well).

At Emily's, Percy is busy drafting his X-Mas grocery shopping list. He asks Emily if she wants anything special. Emily decided to set him straight by telling him that she and Bernard will be working with his Crisis At Christmas project on Christmas Day so she won't be home for dinner, however, Percy can feel free to ask someone over so he's not alone. She appreciates that he's been trying to shield her from 'stress' but points out that she has been on her own for quite a while, thank you very much, and can do most things for herself. The one thing she is unable to do is make chips in the desert but should she ever need to, she promises to consult with him. Take that Percy!

Tea has been served at No. 1 and Deirdre is pleased to discover that Craig is quite a good cook. He tells her she suffers from reverse sexism, he's a man, ergo, all he can do is open cans. She apologizes and says it's a shame he won't be around at Christmas, as she could do with a cook. "Who says?!" demands Tracy. Was Deirdre planning on chucking him out on Christmas Eve? A discussion ensues, Craig is not a supporter of Christmas and should he still be installed at No. 1 on Christmas Day he promises not to take part in any festivities.

At the Duckies, Vera tells Jack about cleaning out her Dad's flat. It's sad she reckons - a whole life reduced to 16 bin bags. "It's not what you've owned Vera, it's what you've been," says Jack. Wise words too. Vera has claimed a memento and she proudly produces it for Jack - a white porcelain dog statue. (Looks similar to the one discussed heavily on the CSVU GB a while back - the one Natalie brought with her when she moved in with Des). Vera goes on to say how surprised she was that she could find no correspondence at all from the Royal family. "Did you really expect to?" asks Jack. "Well, they've been in touch, look at that," says Vera, handing something to Jack. "It's an ashtray." "Yes, but read it." Jack reads the inscription, or rather, painted on lettering, "A Gift From Windsor Castle". LOL!

Reggie & Maureen share a table at the pub. Maureen twitters on about spending the whole day near cheese. (Funny, I didn't think she spent that much time with Reg at work). Reg cuts her off telling her he spoke to Rita about Ted's old house, made an offer and she accepted it. All their plans are back on. Maureen is thrilled and Reg re-presents her with her engagement ring.

Don's taxi pulls up outside Denise's. He buzzes for her apologizing for being a bit late. Denise says she didn't call for a taxi. Don says she's been the victim of another hoax call. Denise asks if he can spare her a few minutes. Funnily enough, he can.

Back in the pub Tanya tries to wheedle information about Alison out of Steve. "Good friend is she?" she asks. "Obviously, " says Steve. "Oh, well, Vicky will be home soon. Guess it will be nice for you to have some company." Me-ow!

Raquel, still in the elf dress (and oh my, it has a matching hat) breezes in to the pub. She's had a fabulous time at the Duffield 'do'. It was a kiddie party. "International, high-flying, executive kids no doubt," says Tanya. Raquel refuses to be baited this time. "Do you know that the best part of all this is that I don't have to pretend to you. I'd have said I'd had a wonderful time tonight even if I hadn't because I couldn't stand you sneering at me." "Well, I like your glamorous ball gown," snipes Tanya. "It's a nice change from doing glamour," retorts Raquel, "I'd be Santa's Little Helper any day particularly with the reindeer we had. They were gorgeous the both of them and Blitzen took me phone number." Raquel 1, Tanya 0.

Don comforts a distressed Denise. She tells him about all the phone calls, ordered taxis and pizzas that turn up on her doorstep. He asks her if she's been to the police. She says no, because it all sounds so silly. She thinks it's kids but there isn't anyone she hasn't suspected at one point. Neighbours, kids, Fiona and now Tanya. Don, very keen to be her knight in shining armour, offers to spend the night on the sofa. Denise gratefully accepts and pours them both a nightcap.

Final shot - Don with a smug, satisfied, Viagra-kicking-in grin on his face.

End Credits

Tammy Mitchell

Written By - STEPHEN MALLATRATT Directed By - MERVYN CUMMING

Friday (3630, Wednesday 8 December 1993)

Denise wakes up Don who's kipped on the settee. She's brought him a cuppa tea and thanks him. He naturally offers anytime thought she doesn't answer that and they exchange a few friendly words. Denise mentions being too busy to put up Christmas decorations so Don jumps in (well, figuratively) and offers. He points out he'll be handy to have around if anything else funny happens.

Deirdre catches Tracy coming out of Craig's room in the morning. She barely has the decency to look somewhat sheepish at being caught but bold face lies and says she was only seeing if Craig wanted a cup of tea. And does he? Deirdre snaps. Yes he does. Deirdre isn't fooled and is stroppy because she has to clean up after the pair. Tracy pretends she was going to do the dishes before work (pigs may fly) but, cowering under her mother's killer glare, urges her mother to go to work and the dishes will be done before she comes home (yeah, about 5 minutes before!)

Don gets out of the taxi. Was he out on an early run? Nope. He pretends to Ivy who's on her way to work that he was working all night. Ivy is fooled. She invites Don to the Bettabuys Christmas party that night but he declines, saying he has something else on. She smiles a bit tightly and, mentioning she'll be home at dinnertime for her half day off, refers him to the breakfast makings in the icebox and goes off to work but when she turns away from him her face loses it's smile and she looks vaguely suspicious.

Mavis begins to read out loud from a rather cheerful Christmas card. "Santa sitting on his sleigh Rudolph's nose shines red If they fill my stocking up I'll take them both to . . ." OIK! Mavis turns red and throws a wobbler over the decidedly untraditional card and goes off on a rant about how people don't know the true meaning of Christmas anymore. Rita tries to placate her but she's outraged. "I don't know what things are coming to, I really don't!" Mavis moans just as Emily and Bernard enter the Kabin. Devil Rita gives Bernard the naughty card which elicits a chuckle from him, to Mavis' chagrin as she climbs the high moral ground. He soothes Mavis by asking if they can have the Kabin as a collection center for gifts to do with this Crisis at Christmas project. Rita ok's it and Mavis likes the idea. Much more the true spirit after all. Pressing his luck, Bernard asks if Mavis would be willing to take in someone for Christmas day, a sort of adoption. It would probably be an elderly person who would otherwise be alone. Mavis reluctantly agrees from the corner she's been backed into, pleasing Bernard and Emily to no end. (Why didn't they ask Rita, as well?)

Tanya serves Denise with a bit of a lame attempt at humour. Denise's back is up and Bet observes that she's very hostile towards Tanya and gives her the drink on the house. Tanya is sent off to serve elsewhere and Bet lets Denise talk. Denise isn't sure Tanya is the one playing tricks on her but thinks after what Tanya did to Raquel. . . well who knows? Bet, while agreeing that Tanya can be a malicious bitch doesn't think it's Tanya's style but promises to find out.

In the Kabin, Mavis hopes she's done the right thing and wonders what Derek is going to think. Speak of the . . . well, Derek doesn't exactly put you in mind of the devil does he? He's here anyway, come to take Mavis to lunch. With Rita's urging, Mavis tells Derek what she's done and that they'll have an elderly person for Christmas dinner. To her surprise, Derek is all for the plan and she squeals and hugs him gratefully.

Ivy visits Vera to offer to buy her Christmas groceries on her staff discount. Vera notices that Ivy's had her hair done for the party and wonders if Denise did it. Ivy purses her lips and hisses an opinion about Denise's morals and alleycats. (eh? She was attending Denise's birthday party just a few days ago and although spending the party serving and clearing up, seemed to have a great time so why all this, now?) Somewhere in this, Don gets mentioned and Vera lets slip she's seen Don's taxi parked at the Salon a lot lately though she isn't implying anything at all, just saying. Ivy's face tightens again and she leaves in a huff.

At the Bettabuys Christmas party, it's early, only past 7 and there are only a few people there yet. Curly grumps and moans and bickers with Elaine about the punch, the lack of attendance and is being an overall Scrooge. She won't even dance with him as an example. She wants to have fun too, after all! But he's the last person she wants to dance with anyway after what he did to her. Ivy arrives just ahead of Reg and Maureen. Curly offers them punch but Reg declines the stuff that the staff are provided with for free and insists Curly buy them expensive drinks, such as scotch and champers.

Bet confronts Tanya about Denise's accusations. Tanya angrily denies it. She has no quarrel with Denise. Yes she played a trick on Raquel but she apologized. She's resentful of Bet accusing her but Bet points out that though she believes her, Tanya's attitude has been less than acceptable and she'd better smarten up. With Raquel back, there is no staffing problem. So Think On! Bet snaps in that way that only Bet can.

Back to the party, the dance floor is now crowded with couples slow dancing to Knights in White Satin, that perennial romantic favourite. Andy's got his head on someone's shoulder, Elaine is seen swaying wildly in the background and Reg and Maureen are tripping the light, fantastically happy. Curly is awkwardly dancing with Ivy and we notice that that randy what's-his-name from the shipping department is grabbing his partner's backside which has not gone unnoticed by Mr. Fun Police but Ivy even says to let it be. Back to Reg and Maureen who are watching Curly's weirdness. Oh that's rich,.. Actually speaking of Weird, Reg has one arm round Maureen dancing and is combing his scalp with the other hand! Oh things are hotting up between these two with Maureen promising him a night to remember. (Now, men? Please remember, combs are NOT normally an aphrodisiac to most of us women. Don't try this at home!) Oh dear. Elaine is nearly legless and staggers backward into Curly, fawning all over him like white on rice. Curly tries to lead her off the floor but she is stuck in getting snugly and romantic. Curly seems awkward and somewhat horrified that Elaine is so affectionate, so drunk and so loud in front of all the staff, especially when she invites him to her room, 206, with a big sloppy kiss and then she staggers off, leering at him invitingly. Reg and Maureen decide to head off as well, in a flurry of heated kisses and smoldering glances.

Rita buys drinks for herself and the Wiltons and noticing Deirdre's dreary look, one for her too. Emily and Bernard arrive to reveal to Mavis and Derek the identity of their Christmas guest but they look apprehensive. It's someone the Wilton's already know and who would otherwise be on their own. Uh oh. Mavis and Derek both bubble over with enthusiasm and good will. When a Wilton gives his word there will be no retreat, Derek announces. Bernard offers to call it off if there are any objections. Mavis simpers smugly at Derek's side as Bernard reveals . . . Wait for it . . . Mr. Sugden!!! Gulp! Well they can't back down now can they so Mavis weakly assures Emily and Bernard that it will be fine. Mr. Sugden is a gentleman. (wouldn't you have to be signed up for this Crisis at Christmas program to be issued a Christmas family? I can't see Percy agreeing to a charitable thing like that, independent as he is)

Reg and Maureen enter the room in the hotel that Maureen booked. The rooms must be situated directly over the party room from the sounds thumping and echoing in the room. They begin to get jiggy with it, Maureen then instructing Reg to don the robe in the bathroom, barely coherent and shaking with the power of her own lust. Down the hall, Curly knocks on Elaine's door. It takes awhile but she finally staggers to the door and opens it. He seems nervous still, when faced with the woman he's been wanting for so long. She drags him into the room and gloms on to him lip to lip. "Faced" is pretty close to the mark where her condition is concerned. That, by the way, is short for Sh**faced! Another expression locally known for that is "Drunk and Ugly" which also describes Elaine pretty well, sloppy, gobby, stinking drunk! Very attractive I must say. (not) Anyway Curly is seemingly playing for time when he dashes into the loo. Is he trying to stall so that he can politely extricate himself from the situation? Nope, he's checking his breath, rinsing his mouth so as to be fresher (oh, like her breath is going to smell like the lilies of spring with the amount of alcohol she's consumed? LOL!) He checks his pits and straightens his bow tie, tearing off his dinner jacket and masterfully re-enters the bedroom. As he rounds the corner, it must be noted that Relax by Frankie Goes to Hollywood is reverberating through the walls now. (perfect!) He discovers Elaine spread out on the bed. Passed out. He tries to wake her but it's too late.

In another room, Maureen waits for Reg. She's wearing a peach satin nightie. She attempts to ravish him but he really needs to get something out first. He wants to make sure there are no secrets, no lies or skeletons between them before they finally consummate their relationship. He needs to confess. He's been with another while they were separated, a young lady at head office. Maureen clasps Reg's head to her heaving possums and forgives him. You see, she has not been entirely blameless herself, she blurts, his head still on her chest, face to the camera. She's been a naughty girl! ROFL the vcr freeze frame here has him in the most lustful and lascivious leer after he heard this phrase, head against her breast with her head tossed back laughing above him!!! Oh for one of those capturing software packages! She has forgiven him and now she tells him the truth, she's had an assignation with Norman! Yes! Curly! Oh oh, he freaks! He pulls back and pushes her away in horror! No! No! No! he moans.

Diane Johnston

Bernard Morton ROLAND MACLEOD Craig Lee KEIRAN O'BRIEN
Written by KEN BLAKESON Directed by MERVYN CUMMING


Originally transmitted: 10, 13, 15, 17 & 20 December 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 11 - Friday 15 September 2000
Episode Numbers: 3631 - 3635

Monday (3631, Friday 10 December 1993)

It's morning on the street. Reg leaves home and finds a dog on his doorstep, licking at some garbage. Reg shakes his head; what else will happen today? Life can't get much worse. He walks to his car, head up, eyes forward, ignoring a shouted greeting from Percy. He gets into his car and drives off.

Deirdre is upset that Craig has taken 40 minutes in the bathroom. Craig tries to wind her up by telling her that clockwatching isn't good for her. "You should meditate, ground your energy".

Percy calls into the Kabin and Mavis asks him if there's anything he doesn't like to eat, since "as you get older, your digestive system isn't always what it was". Percy is puzzled. Why should Mavis care about his culinary likes and dislikes? "It's for when you come round on Christmas." Oops, it looks like Percy is the last to know about his Christmas visit chez Wilton. Offended at being passed around like a parcel, he tells Mavis she can forget it and storms from the Kabin. Rita sympathizes, and is rewarded with an invite to the Wiltons in Percy's place. Conveniently, Don walks in which allows Rita to dodge the offer. Denise is browsing magazines. Don arranges to see her later, after she's been to see Hanif.

At Bettabuys, Elaine is in a very good mood and asks Ivy if she enjoyed herself at the party. Elaine seems to be under the impression that she wasn't drunk, telling Ivy that she's seen "too many people get legless at these staff do's and do things that they regret later". "Really," a surprised Ivy replies. Elaine tells Ivy that she knows her limit. Curly joins them and observes that Elaine seems "remarkably chipper, given that it's the morning after the night before". "That's more than can be said for you with your matching bloodshot eyes," Elaine shoots back. Ivy looks like she wishes the floor would open up and swallow her. Curly says that last night, Elaine thought his eyes were soulful and sexy. Elaine walks away, declaring that "we now have living proof that alcohol does rot the brain". Curly catches up to her and attempts to remind her of the previous night's almost encounter, but Elaine has no memory of it. "I think the most sensible thing you can do is go home to bed until you are in full possession of your faculties," she suggests. "Only if you come with me," Curly winks. Elaine gives him a sharp smack across the face. "One more remark like that and I'll have you for sexual harassment," she hisses, and marches off. An amused Ivy tells Maureen, "he got thumped!" "Not Reg!" Maureen blurts. Poor Curly. His day is only going to get worse. Maureen approaches Curly and asks if he's spoken to Reg yet. Curly says no, Reg is in Liverpool. She begins to tell him that she's let the cat out of the bag about their one off, but Curly isn't in the mood to listen and she scurries off without saying anything.

Denise arrives at Hanif's office, demanding to have a word with him. She accuses him of being her stalker/practical joker. She's certain his motive is revenge. In response, Hanif tosses a set of photos onto his desk. They're honeymoon photos. Hanif was married 3 weeks ago. "Congratulations," Denise says quietly. Scratch Hanif from the list of suspects.

Prepare for a showdown at Bettabuys. Reg walks determinedly up an aisle, ignoring a question from Ivy, until he reaches Curly. "A word. Your office. Now." Maureen is pushing a rogue shopping cart through the aisle and is informed by Ivy that her "betrothed has just hauled Curly off looking as though he's going in front of a firing squad". "Oh my god!" Maureen exclaims, pushing the cart with the wobbly wheel out of the way and rushing after them, leaving Ivy to contemplate just what exactly was in the punch at the party.

Steve stops at the Kabin to pick up a paper. Mavis comments that Steve has something to look forward to, since Vicky is due home today. Steve looks less than thrilled. Rita tells Mavis that given her success with Percy and Steve, perhaps she should stop trying to cheer everyone up ("stop being Mary Poppins"). This leads to Mavis asking Rita again about coming round for her Christmas dinner. A horrified Rita is saved this time by Deirdre, who has a moan about Craig. Rita suggests that Deirdre be straight with Tracy by telling her that Craig has to go.

Reg takes Curly's office phone off the hook. "You seduced her!" he accuses. "There's no point in trying to deny it." Curly doesn't. He reminds Reg that Maureen has been married, so she wasn't exactly unsullied. He defends Maureen, saying that she was upset and angry over Reg and Debbie Scott and needed a friend. "It was just an isolated moment. We were like two shipwreck survivors clinging to each other for comfort." Reg responds to this by framing himself as the implacable foe that shipwreck survivors sometimes face. One from which they cannot escape, no matter how hard they swim.

At the Rovers, Rita discusses excuses with Bet, excuses to avoid having to go round to the Wiltons for Christmas. Bet suggests that Rita come to her, and a second later invites Denise too, who has strolled into the pub looking shell-shocked. "Right now, I don't think I'll make it to Christmas," Denise replies. "Tanya, medical emergency, gin and tonic on the double," Bet barks, and ushers Denise to the booth she was sharing with Rita. Denise tells Bet and Rita that she thought she'd found her bogeyman, but she was wrong. Bet suggests going to the police, but Denise is worried that the police will dismiss her as a neurotic woman. Vicki arrives and is embraced by Bet. As she's going through to the back, she chats with Tanya and Raquel about Steve. Raquel says he doesn't come in much anymore. Surprisingly, Tanya doesn't spill the beans, but says he drinks at his mom's place now that he's moved back there.

Back to Curly and Reg. Reg reminds Curly that he's been a father, mentor, and friend to him, which makes Curly's betrayal all the more hurtful. As he turns to leave, he declares that he'll never forgive Curly for what he did. Maureen is waiting outside the office, but Reg pushes her aside. Curly tells Maureen to come into the office. He asks Maureen why she told Reg, after all the times Maureen had begged him to keep his mouth shut. Maureen tearfully tells him that she wanted to be honest and not have any skeletons when she married Reg. Curly tells her that the price of her clear conscience is his career. Maureen says she'll talk to Reg, but Curly thinks it would just make things worse. She asks for Curly's forgiveness. He offers it, not wanting to hold a grudge.

Steve pulls up in front of the Rovers (in a M.V.B Motors van) and Vicky rushes over to greet him. Vicky wants a kiss, but Steve has suddenly become shy about public affection. He says he has lots of orders to do, and drives off. Not the homecoming Vicky was expecting.

Emily arrives home to a disappointed Percy, who takes her to task about the plans she had made for him for Christmas day. (I do think setting him up without asking him first was inconsiderate of her)

Another happy meal at Deirdre's. Craig is offered tea but refuses because it's not herbal. He says the stir fry was good. Deirdre responds that it was the freezer shop, not her. He leaves the room, and Tracy immediately starts in about how Craig can't win. Deirdre says she wants help, not compliments, so Tracy gathers up the dirty dishes, yelling "anything else?" "Some peace and quiet," Deirdre says, but at that moment strains of Craig's guitar can be heard, and poor Deirdre realizes that peace and quite won't be coming soon.

Denise has a visitor -- Hanif. He offers his help in getting to the bottom of Denise's mystery caller. He knows someone who can trace the calls for her. After ensuring that there are no strings attached, Denise accepts his offer, and he promises he'll be in touch when he has some information.

Vicky asks Raquel if she can have a word. She wants to know how you can tell if a bloke's gone off you. "When they stop phoning," is Raquel's first thought. Vicky asks, what if they're with you, but they're not with you? Raquel doesn't see that as a problem but as a bloke playing hard to get, though her example of contrasting Wayne and Gordon seems to illustrate that the bloke has probably lost interest or never had any to begin with. Vicky owns up that she's talking about Steve. Raquel tells her to be patient, then leaves in response to a summons by Bet. Vicky isn't reassured by the conversation.

Deirdre tries to clear the air with Tracy, but instead has a bit of a slanging match. When they've both calmed down, Deirdre asks if it would be such a big deal to ask Craig to go. "No," Tracy says, "but if he goes, I go."

Over a drink, Derek admits to Mavis that he's relieved Percy won't be their guest for Christmas dinner. Mavis feels guilty because they didn't really want him but were just going to put up with him.

Denise lies on her sofa listening to her phone ring. She finally leaps up and answers it. "Hanif?" Silence. "Is that you? Who the hell are you? What kind of pervert are you? Why, for god's sake, are you doing this to me?" a visibly upset Denise shouts into the phone. We switch to an external view of her flat window. In the lower right hand corner of the shot, we see a black-gloved hand replace the receiver on a pay phone. The credits roll.

Sarah Ettritch

Hanif Ruparell - AYUB KHAN-DIN
Written by - ADELE ROSE Directed by - MERVYN CUMMING

Tuesday (3632, Monday 13 December 1993)

It's Monday morning on the Street, and as the postman attempts to deliver mail to the Salon, Denise opens the door and takes her mail from his hand, with a 'Thank you.'

At Deirdre's, she's clearing the table when Tracy asks where her bag is. 'There, where you left it,' says Deirdre, and tries to begin a dialogue with Tracy, who doesn't want another lecture. The argument begun the day before continues. Deirdre can't stand living with Craig's mess, and the upset he causes in her home, while Tracy is resentful that Deirdre doesn't like him. There's no meeting of minds, and Tracy leaves, in high dudgeon, with her usual hard-done-by attitude intact, while Deirdre looks saddened and rueful.

Denise is opening her mail when Don pops in to the salon, wondering where Fiona is, as he notices that Denise is alone. She's at a dental appointment, and that question answered, Don brings up his real reason for being there - to find out the outcome of the confrontation with Hanif. He's sceptical when Denise tells him that Hanif isn't the guilty party, even if he was abroad, as there are phones there too, but has to accept that Hanif has no motive to harass Denise, when she recounts that he was abroad on his honeymoon. 'That's that. Another name off list-back to square one,' says Don, but Denise tells him, 'Not quite.' She's about to explain Hanif's clandestine plan to obtain the phone number of her stalker-caller, when she's interrupted by the arrival of a customer. She'll catch up with Don later, she tells him, and bustles off, leaving Don looking thoughtful.

In the Kabin, Mavis is arranging Christmas cards in a rack as Rita bids goodbye to a customer - another one who is going abroad for Christmas, to Madeira. Mavis feels that Christmas should be spent at home, but concedes that at least it's warmer abroad, when Phyllis arrives, complaining that it's parky in the mornings now. The discussion moves to Phyllis being alone at Christmas, and Rita advises her to get after Percy, who is in the same boat, but Mavis disagrees. He was most insistent that he had his own plans. Rita dismisses that notion, saying that Percy hates charity, and Phyllis cheers up with the thought that she can get Percy to her place on Christmas day.

At the Duckworth's, Jack is calculating the odds in the racing pages of the newspaper. 'Two's company,' he mutters, 'No chance!" and Vera tells him to make a start at cleaning the place while she's gone, visiting our Terry for the last time before he's sprung from gaol, with time off for good behaviour. Jack says that he hopes it IS the last time! Vera is dressing little Tommy, and doesn't want Terry to think he's coming home to a doss-house. Jack retorts that after what he's been used to, their petit palais would seem like 5 stars. Vera waxes sentimental, saying that Terry has changed, and only needs to make a fresh start, which she's determined to give him. She hugs Tommy and says how she can't wait to have Terry home. 'You and me both, darlin',' says Jack, but his expression shows that his reasons for agreeing with her are not necessarily the same as Vera's.

Meanwhile, at Bettabuys, Reg enters the store and looks around in disapproval. When Curly greets him as 'Reg,' he reminds Curly that from now on the name is Mister Holdsworth. The chill in the air is palpable. After some preliminary sparring, Reg lays down the law to Curly, pointing out at least half a dozen shortcomings in the store on this frosty morning. Curly defends himself and his staff, since they're down four staff members today, but Reg will have none of it. Curly vehemently points out that all this chastisement has nothing to do with business, but is really about Maureen, and most men grow out of such attitudes when they graduate out of short pants, but Reg stands his ground, reminding Curly of who is the area manager. Curly bites his tongue in the end, and stalks off, unable to refute Reg's superior position. Reg looks around the store, his beady eyes seeking even more evidence of dereliction of duty, and his expression is priceless! LOL! What a character!

At the corner shop, the atmosphere is considerably warmer, as Betty spends £22.36 at the till, and Alf offers to drop off her purchases later. But storm clouds appear when Alf refuses to honour the £2 discount coupon that Brendan Scott offered pensioners towards their Christmas spending. Betty is affronted, but Alf is within his rights, he says, to which Betty responds that she's also within her rights to spend her money elsewhere, and leaves her box of shopping on the counter. Deirdre gives him an old-fashioned look, and Alf is exasperated as he begins to put it all back on the shelves from whence it came.

Vera and Tommy are now at the prison visiting Terry, and Vera is happy that there's only one week to go before Terry will be released. Terry is remorseful, and seems to realise that he has a lot of ground to make up, not having done much for his son so far. Vera reminds him that Tommy has been in good hands and has come to no harm, which prompts Terry to express his thanks for all that Vera and Jack have done, knowing that it hasn't been easy for them. Vera says that the only thanks she needs is for Terry to do what's best for Tommy in future. He will, Terry replies, only the best is good enough for our Tommy, and he intends to see that he gets it. But how, he doesn't explain.

Don is finishing a half at the Rovers' with Ivy, but isn't paying her any attention as she wonders if they need more stuff on the Christmas tree. He looks to the door whenever anyone enters the pub. Ivy asks if he's expecting someone, but Don replies that he has to get back to work, and since Ivy doesn't want a lift back to Bettabuys just yet, he leaves, passing Phyllis, who makes a beeline for Percy at the bar. She wastes no time in offering him a slap up Christmas dinner - the works - mince pies and all, at her place, with a cracker to pull at the end of it, since they're both on their own, but Percy bridles at the suggestion. Phyllis knows that Emily and her vicar are going to be feeding those who can't feed themselves, but Percy intimates that he'll be helping them do so - any excuse to avoid being alone with Phyllis, it seems. When Betty brings his hotpot, Phyllis orders one for herself, and invites herself to join him in a booth. Denise arrives, and offers Ivy a drink, but Ivy responds with, 'Oh! Denise!' in a way which suggests that she now knows for whom Don was waiting, and gives Denise the cold shoulder. Denise is unconcerned, and orders a bottle of cider. Ivy's face looks calculating.

When Deirdre arrives home for lunch, Craig and Tracy are in the process of leaving with their bags packed, and Deirdre once again tries to explain her feelings to Tracy, while Craig leans against the wall, totally unconcerned. Tracy reiterates that she wants to live her own life, and can't under Deirdre's roof, to which Deirdre replies that she can't help but worry when she sees Tracy doing something she knows is wrong. Tracy is unmoved, and when Deirdre asks where they are going, tells her mother that they've got mates, and wherever it is, it'll be better than 'here!' Deirdre's face says it all - she's blown it with Tracy again. Outside, Ken is passing as they put their bags into Craig's delivery van, and asks where they're off to. Tracy is still angry, and tells him that they've been chucked out, and she won't stay where she's not wanted. Deirdre was impossible to live with, and they're going, so don't try to find them. Ken is conciliatory, but can do nothing in the face of her determination.

Back at the Rovers', Betty offers Phyllis and Percy some nice homemade rice pudding, but neither is happy, and both refuse. Percy comments that he's been there longer than he intended, and after Betty reassures him that the Rovers' doesn't chuck out folk for outstaying their welcome, pointedly replies that some folk outstay their welcome as soon as they walk in the door, as he glowers at Phyllis. This was funny, but made one wince, and think what a mean old codger he could be! *(Please see footnote at end of credits). Phyllis looks most disgruntled, and when Emily and Bernard, the vicar, enter the pub and greet them cheerily, she attacks them both for 'taking advantage of an old gentleman at Christmas.' She won't see Percy, and it's their fault. They're both mystified, but Percy jumps in so that Bernard expresses delight that Percy will help out. Emily isn't so pleased, however. Percy asks Phyllis if she believes him now. She has no choice, she replies, but she'll be thinking of him, 'especially when I get to the parson's nose!' Dear old indomitable Phyllis!

Deirdre is now explaining the truth to Ken, over a cup of tea. It was Craig who had to go, not Tracy, but, as Ken realises, Tracy's attitude was 'if he goes, I go.' Ken begins to suggest that he'll do his best to help again, but this time it will be even harder, and is very surprised when Deirdre replies that she doesn't care. She had to live in the midden that Craig created for weeks, and bent over backwards to accommodate Tracy and her 'sullen toerag,' and she's no longer concerned, even if Ken is shocked at this reversal of her attitude. Tracy knows where Deirdre is if she's wanted, and Tracy is welcome to 'Godzilla!' Deirdre is going to get on with her own life - she's had enough. Ken doesn't say a word.

Vera is back from visiting Terry, and as she irons Tommy's clothes, expresses concern at how he's growing out of them. Jack nips her in the bud, saying that they've done enough, but Vera is still misty-eyed over her visit. Terry loves his little lad, she tells Jack, but Jack hopes that he'll still feel the same way when he gets out. Vera reassures Jack that Terry intends to get the very best for his boy, and he meant it. Jack wishes to know if Terry mentioned the compensation that still hasn't materialised, to offset the expense they've had in caring for Tommy, and Vera is up in arms immediately. Jack is only trying to be practical, not greedy, he argues, but she forbids him to bring up the subject with Terry when he gets home - or Jack will be the victim of grievous bodily harm, she tells him, as she brandishes the electric iron in his face!

Reg is still wandering the aisles at Weatherfield Bettabuys, and, on seeing Maureen, makes a detour, but she rushes to waylay him, and insists on a discussion. Hiding behind a door, as carols play in the background, Reg complains of feeling all eyes on him, the victim, but Maureen tells him that no one knows, and no one WILL know, IF they can talk sensibly about 'it.' "You wouldn't!" Reg says, appalled.

A quick cut to Sally and Kevin's finds Sally still down in the dumps from worry about Kevin's sentencing tomorrow. Strangely, Kevin is optimistic, since he talked to the solicitor, and expects 'only' a fine. Steve MacDonald is the one who needs to worry, as it's all down to him. Sally isn't convinced, as solicitors can be wrong, but Kevin says that Steve is paying for the fine anyway, so not to worry. Sally concedes, and manages a smile, and they hug. Rosie, I forgot to say, is missing from the scene, as she's at a friend's birthday party. I guess she's too young yet to be sent upstairs to wash her hands when the grownups talk!

We return to Reg and Maureen, and they seem to have removed themselves to a back area of the store, but we can still hear the muted orchestral carols in the background. As Reg paces, Maureen continues to explain how 'it' happened between her and Curly. She was distraught, she tells Reg, thinking she'd lost him for good, and desperate for consolation. Curly just happened to offer it (Poor Curly - as I recall, he wasn't the instigator at the time!) All that resulted for her was the realisation that she'd been wrong. No one could take Reg's place. She begs for his understanding. Reg feels that she showed that she would succumb to temptation, and with Norman Watts, of all people! She tells him that he has to be the strong one. She's nothing without him, and has done nothing with her life - she had no future, until Reg came back into her life. Reg replies that she has humiliated him, and she agrees that he must be upset that Curly took advantage of her vulnerability. (Again - !!!) Reg disagrees, and tells her that it's different for a man. It's a matter of honour. Oh, she mutters, then I won't tell anyone the real reason why we're canceling the wedding. "Who said anything about canceling the wedding?' cries Reg. 'Is the wedding still on, then?' she asks tentatively. Reg replies that he's not a man who forgives or forgets easily, but he's NOT going to give Curly Watts the satisfaction of knowing he'd blighted their future together! All is forgiven, and they fall into each other's arms, only to be surprised by Curly and a bevy of Bettabuys staff ladies, exiting from what appears to be a freight elevator.

After tea at Kevin and Sally's, Mike Baldwin arrives on the doorstep to wish Kevin good luck for the morning, and also to warn him about what he should say. He doesn't want his name mentioned, or there could be repercussions for all of them. It would be bad for business, and Kevin should remind MacDonald of that also. "Nice to know your boss has your best interest at heart, isn't it?' Sally says sarcastically, as Mike lets himself out.

Don and Ivy are back in a booth at the Rovers', and Don is again avoiding Ivy's prolonged company. When Alf comes in for a pint, Betty asks him if he's changed his mind about her coupon, to which he replies in the negative, and so Betty won't serve him, and passes him on to Jack. Alf is baffled as to why Betty won't see reason. 'She's a woman, isn't she?' asks Jack rhetorically, and with irony. Denise has entered also, and asks once again for a cider from Betty, but Don, who has been moping at Ivy's side, becomes galvanised and excuses himself to Ivy, as he needs a word with Denise. Ivy's face speaks volumes - she's royally peeved. Don declines a drink, and he and Denise sit down at a table, where Don immediately asks what she was going to tell him this morning, before they were interrupted. She explains Hanif's plan to find who has been making the frightening phone calls to the Salon and the flat. Don is disbelieving again, and she reassures him that it might be illegal, but it can be done, and that lets Hanif off the hook, or he wouldn't be putting himself at risk of legal difficulties. Don looks very anxious, and warns her that she herself could be in trouble, but Denise doesn't care. If it means that she'll be able to nail whomever has been harassing her, it'll be worth it. Don looks concerned, but Denise looks triumphant, and between them, Ivy can be seen in her booth, glowering, listening, and looking daggers at them both.

Ruth Dempsey

Craig Lee - KIERAN O'BRIEN Terry Duckworth - NIGEL PIVARO Bernard Morton - ROLAND MACLEOD Phyllis Pearce - JILL SUMMERS Percy Sugden - BILL WADDINGTON
Written by - BARRY HILL Directed by - DAVID PENN

Wednesday (3633, Wednesday 15 December 1993)

Thursday (3634, Friday 17 December 1993)

Friday (3635, Monday 20 December 1993)

A new day begins on the street, but it's not a good one for Ivy, after last night's revelation that Don is the person who's been harassing Denise. She sits at her dining room table, head in hand, with a look of despair on her face. Don comes downstairs, walks past her without a word, than heaves a heavy sigh. Ivy offers to get him some breakfast, to which Don sarcastically responds "so you're feeding me now -- last night you wanted to kill me." Ivy says she's sorry for all of that, but gently suggests to Don that he get professional help; she'll help him in any way she can. Don, however, feels there's no point in any of that, since carrying on living with Ivy would only be "going through the motions." "Oh my God," moans Ivy, "how did we get into this mess?" Don sullenly replies that they poison each other, that each brings out the worst in the other. Ivy encourages Don to talk about whatever it is that's troubling him -- she promises to listen and to try to understand. Don apologizes because he never meant to put her through all this, and goes on to say that he wishes he'd "done it right" when he tried to top himself in his taxi. Ivy still believes that they can salvage things and get on with their lives, but Don informs her that nothing can be done -- "I'm fed up being me."

Vera stands out on the street, instructing Jack and Curly, who are upstairs in their respective houses trying to tie up a huge "Welcome Home Terry" banner between the bedroom windows. As Vera shrieks that it isn't straight, a disgruntled Curly reminds her that he's doing her a huge favour, given that she no longer even shops at Bettabuys. Percy passes by, wondering what all the commotion is about, and when Vera excitedly tells him that "RTurry" is coming home today, Percy snaps "so I see." He makes a disparaging remark about some mothers loving their sons, and when Vera demands to know what he means by that, Jack hollers down at her to just let the remark pass.

Vera notices Denise coming out of her salon, and rushes over to tell her the good news, but Denise pushes past without a word. "Snotty cow," observes Vera.

Although we don't see it, Denise has obviously walked to the Brennan's door, where she pushes an envelope through the mail slot. Inside, Ivy picks it up, opens it, and then hastily hides it when there's a knock at the door. It's Vera, carrying little Tommy, and wondering where Don is, since she booked his taxi a few days earlier. Ivy tells her that Don is "poorly," and can't possibly run Vera to the prison, over Vera's protests that Don could have at least let her know earlier in the day. Ivy rushes Vera out the door and then calls up to Don, telling him that an envelope has arrived for him, with a cheque inside for £2,200. Don comes down the stairs while Ivy asks if that's the amount of money he loaned to Denise. "Ay," replies Don, "but she doesn't want my money now." He sadly realizes that Denise wants nothing more to do with him, and tells Ivy that if she's smart, she won't (want anything to do with him) either.

At the Kabin, Mavis, Rita, and Jim MacDonald chuckle at the article about Alf Roberts on the front page of the local newspaper. The headline screams "Angry OAPs slam shopkeeper Scrooge." Jim observes that "your man's going to love that, isn't he?" Mavis reads part of the article out loud: ""Councillor Roberts has trodden on our dreams," lashed one pensioner last night. War veteran "Perry" Sugden..." They all laugh at the typo, wondering how Percy will feel when he realizes his name has been misspelled. Mavis continues: "...He is not just letting down the pensioners, he's undermining a charity effort. People will go hungry this Christmas thanks to his mean actions..." Jim remarks that if he was "Perry" Sugden, he'd keep his head down because... but Rita quickly interrupts him when Alf comes into the shop, wearing a huge smile and clearly in a very good mood. He goes on about it being a "grand morn, bright and crisp," and seeing the newspaper in Mavis' hands, remarks that he doesn't care to read the paper during the day -- it's always full of bad news. No, he waits until evening to read his paper, whereupon Rita quips that he's got something to look forward to, then. Alf asks for a quarter of mint humbugs, adding that he "feels like a humbug this morning."

The Hortons wait outside the prison, and seeing Terry finally emerge from the building, Jeff calls to him, offering a lift into Weatherfield and a proper breakfast. Inside the car, Mrs. Horton sheepishly asks Terry how he's feeling, to which Terry replies that he's alright, but will be better when things are "settled." They drive off just as Vera's cab arrives. Inside the vehicle, Vera happily tells little Tommy and the cab driver that they shouldn't have long to wait.

Des' face falls when he sees the banner welcoming Terry home, and noticing that it is secured to Curly's bedroom window, asks him how he could do that. Curly defends himself, saying that Terry used to be a mate of his, and besides that, what could he say to Vera when she asked for his help. "You could have said no," snaps Des, sarcastically commenting that he thought Curly was a friend of Lisa's.

Terry and the Hortons sit in a booth at a restaurant while Terry consumes a huge breakfast. Jeff Horton launches into the matter at hand by telling Terry that he has drawn-up an agreement, which he produces and lays on the table. Terry is clearly disinterested, and dismisses the agreement as being "unnecessary," but Jeff encourages him to read it. When it's clear that Terry isn't going to do that, Jeff begins going over the details. It's an agreement regarding the "care and custody of Tommy Duckworth." Doreen quips that "it's what Lisa would have wanted."

Vera has obviously been outside the prison for some time, and since Terry has still not come out, she decides to go inside and demand to know what's taking so long.

Back at the restaurant, Jeff carries on with the details of the agreement. Terry is to receive £5,000 initially (Terry tries to finagle more money out of the Hortons by suggesting that he thought it was £6,000, but Jeff stands firm on the original amount), with an additional £2,000 a year until Tommy reaches his sixteenth birthday. Clearly disinterested in anything but the money, Terry quickly signs both copies of the agreement while Doreen heaves a sigh of relief. Naturally, Terry's next question is about the money -- where is it? Jeff informs him that he'll get it when they get Tommy, but Terry informs him that he needs money now -- you know, "walking around money." Jeff reminds him that it will be up to Terry to inform his mother of this new arrangement -- he doesn't want to go into their home to retrieve Tommy while Vera argues and shouts the odds. Terry rolls his eyes and asks Jeff for a few days, to which Jeff agrees. He then produces 100 quid, telling Terry he'll get the balance when they get Tommy.

At the beauty salon, Ivy nervously asks Denise if she can have "a quiet word." In the back, Ivy asks about the cheque, advising Denise that she didn't have to pay the debt back in one lump sum. Denise makes it clear that she *did* have to do things that way -- she doesn't want Don's money, and she doesn't want anything else to do with him. "I know how you feel," responds Ivy; "I'm married to him." Denise tells Ivy that she'd be wise to get shut of Don, but Ivy tries to explain that as far as she's concerned, Don is "ill" and needs help. Denise wonders if Ivy is trying to get her to actually feel sorry for Don, but Ivy denies that. Instead, Ivy confesses that she's worried about what folk would say if they found out, so she's begging for Denise's silence -- "for me," she pleads. "If he can't hold his head up, how can I?" she asks. Denise glowers at her, but capitulates, agreeing that she won't tell anyone.

Ivy returns home, and is alarmed to see that Don has packed a bag. He tells her that he's called his daughter, and that she made it clear that he was more than welcome. Ivy desperately tries to get Don to change his mind, citing a wonderful Christmas together, and assuring Don that Denise has given her word not to tell others. None of this really matters to Don. He tells Ivy that he needs to get away and get his head straight. "I'll see you when I see you," are his parting words.

At the Duckworths' Jack is assuring Vera that Terry will have gone off with some mates straight to a pub to get drunk. Seconds later there's a knock at the door and an ecstatic Vera hugs Terry. She tells him she was at the prison to pick him up, and asks where he was; Terry replies that he had some "business" to look after. He glances around and wonders where Tommy is, and when Vera tells him that his son is down for a nap, Terry insists that she not wake him. Vera offers a slap-up meal, but Terry says that he first wants to go down to the pub with his "dear old pater" and lift a few pints. Jack tries to persuade Terry that there's no need to go to the Rovers Return, and offers to take Terry to any pub of his choice. Terry asks if Jack is ashamed of him, to which Jack does not reply, but Vera jumps in immediately, insisting that "of course he isn't!"

At the Rovers, Curly and Martin are engaged in a game of darts when Jack and Terry walk in. The pub suddenly becomes very quiet as people turn to stare at Terry. Bet breaks the silence by saying hello to Terry. She launches immediately into a discussion of Vera, informing Terry that she's had a hard time of it over the last year, raising little Tommy. Terry sarcastically informs her that he's aware of that. Bet offers a free round to Jack and Terry, and even goes so far as to tell them both that they'll be drinking for free that evening. Curly and Martin come forward to say hello to Terry, who coldly tells Curly that he needs to know who his mates are -- any mate of Des Barnes is no mate of his.

While Terry goes off to play a game of darts with Martin, Denise comes into the pub. Bet asks if there have been any more harassing phone calls. Denise says no; furthermore, there won't be any more, now that she knows who's responsible. Bet asks who the culprit is, but Denise says she can't tell her. Bet, hungry for details, immediately invites Denise into the back.

In Bet's living room, Denise tells Bet again that she's finally found out who was making all the calls and pulling the nasty tricks on her -- "but it doesn't matter because it's over and he won't be doing it again." "He?" replies Bet. "Someone I know?" "Yeah, replies Denise, "but his wife begged me to keep it quiet." Bet instantly guesses that it was Don Brennan, and Denise nods in agreement, swearing Bet to secrecy. "Don Brennan," Bet mutters again in disbelief -- "I need a drink."

Back at the Duckworths', little Tommy has awakened from his nap, and when Terry and Jack return from the pub, Vera tells the child on her lap, "there's your daddy," insisting that Tommy recognizes Terry. Terry laughs at the idea, and as he bends over to pat Tommy's head, the agreement falls out of his pocket. Vera asks what it is, but Terry snatches it up and stuffs it back into his pocket, insisting that it's nothing. Vera natters on happily about their upcoming Christmas, which will be the "best ever" now that little Tommy has his daddy back. She hands Tommy to Terry, and while she witters on about how wonderful the world is, Terry looks at his son with a smirk.

Heather Morlan

Jeff Horton: DICKEN ASHWORTH Doreen Horton: ANNIE RAITT
Written by: JOHN STEVENSON Directed by ROMEY ALLISON


Originally transmitted: 22, 24, 27, 29 & 31 December 1993
Transmitted by WTN: Monday 18 - Friday 22 September 2000
Episode Numbers: 3636 - 3640

Monday (3636, Wednesday 22 December 1993)

We begin in the morning, as we usually do. Des leaves home with a smile on his face and a box of Christmas lights in hand. His smile fades when he's faced once again with the "WELCOME HOME TERRY" banner. He sees Andy and Curly leave for work. They are discussing some idea that Curly has in mind, related to Bettabuys. Andy thinks it's a publicity stunt. Curly chastises Andy for being cynical, but adds that if word of their good deed gets to the Weatherfield Reporter, that would be very good, but not the primary reason for the promotion. Andy asks what he should do with the large stack of yellow handbills that he's carrying. "Leave them around where people can see them," Curly commands. Andy gripes, but Curly reminds him that he was hand picked for the assignment and zooms off to work. As Andy walks down the street wondering where to begin, Percy emerges to collect the milk. Andy tries to hand Percy a handbill, but Percy has no intention of accepting one, launching into one of his grumbles about useless bits of paper. He quickly shuts up (amazing!) when Andy informs him that the handbills explain how seniors can redeem their Brendan Scott vouchers at Bettabuys. Percy takes back everything he said in the last 15 seconds and offers Andy a cup of tea. Andy declines, due to the handbills he has to deliver. Percy is so supportive of the Bettabuys plan that he ducks in to get his coat so he can give Andy a hand.

A family breakfast at the Duckworth home. Vera chatters to Tommy while Jack and Terry tuck into breakfast. When Vera suggests that Terry change Tommy's nappy, Terry announces that a taxi will be arriving at 9 to take him to the solicitors to get his compensation money, and rushes upstairs to get dressed. Jack has noticed that Terry isn't exactly a doting father and says as much to Vera. She defends Terry, saying that he needs time to adjust to his freedom and to get over the trauma of Lisa's death. She tells Jack that Terry needs their support, not criticism (if only she knew!). The taxi arrives. Des has just finished stringing his Christmas lights around the "for sale" sign post when he sees Terry leave. As Terry turns to get into the taxi, their eyes meet and they exchange a long, malicious look.

In the back at the Rovers, Vicky is thoughtfully examining a man's watch. Tanya arrives and Vicky hands the watch to her. Tanya declares it gorgeous, and asks how much it cost. After extracting a promise from Tanya that she won't tell Bet, Vicky admits that it was 250 quid. "How much?!" Tanya exclaims. "Don't you think it's worth it?" Vicky asks. "Yeah, luv, it's worth it. But is he worth it?" Tanya replies. Vicky defends her purchase, saying that she really cares about Steve. Tanya's response is that Steve really cares about Vicky too. How much longer will Tanya be able to keep her knowledge of Steve's cheating to herself?

Audrey breezes into the salon and is blanked by a customer who is just leaving. The salon is very busy, with everyone having their hair done for the holidays. Audrey says hello to Emily, who is sitting under the dryer, and is again ignored. She notices some handbills and picks one up -- and her mouth drops open as she reads it. Wait until Alf finds out!

At the Kabin, Rita has a discussion with Mavis about cruelty to Christmas trees, a cause that Mavis and Derek seem to have taken up. Rita has no time for it, and suggests that if Mavis wants to get involved with a worthy cause, she get in touch with Emily or Percy. Mavis tells Rita that after school, she and Derek will be visiting a plantation to pick up a living tree, one with roots, that will give them pleasure year after year. Jim comes in to buy a chocolate bar, and Andy follows on his heels. Andy asks Jim what he's doing on Christmas. Jim assumes that Andy wants his permission to go to the Queens, but Andy suggests that they all gather at Jim's place. Jim reminds Andy that he and Liz are separated, but Andy would like to see everyone behave as a family, just for one day.

At the corner shop, Audrey has taken it upon herself to remove the card proclaiming the policy on Brendan Scott's vouchers. Alf disagrees with her and wants the card back, but Audrey points out that the shop is dead. Deirdre concurs. Alf won't be moved and begins to chase Audrey around the shop. After they've circled the shelves a few times, Audrey finally surrenders the card to Alf, but then casually mentions that Curly Watts will be the one who profits from Alf's stand on the issue. She tells Alf about the promotion at Bettabuys, including the fact that Bettabuys is providing a mini-bus to shuttle seniors to the store. Alf isn't pleased to hear this news.

Just across the street, a group of seniors is boarding the mini-bus, while Curly, Percy, and the Weatherfield Reporter look on. Curly tells the reporter that since Brendan Scott was a valued employee at Bettabuys for over 30 years, it only seemed right for them to honour the vouchers. Alf rushes over, shouting the odds. After exchanging words, Alf turns to go back to the shop and bumps into two seniors who are about to board the bus, knocking them over. The mishap is photographed by the Reporter.

Terry is on the phone, arranging to meet the Hortons to make the exchange of Tommy for money. They decide on mid-afternoon the next day, at the entrance to Albert Park. Vera arrives home with Tommy and has a discussion with Terry about the possibility of them all moving, now that he has compensation money. Terry couldn't care one way or another and tells Vera that they should just wait and see what happens. Smartly dressed in a suit and tie, he leaves for a night out. "I'm just going to the Rovers," he tells Vera. "There's someone I'm hoping to run into."

Derek and Mavis drag their living tree home. Des happens to be outside and watches Terry walk to the Rovers. He makes a crack to Derek about the Wiltons having another magic tree.

In the Rovers, Tanya spies one classy bloke and is amazed to discover that it's Terry, Jack's son. She tells Jack that Terry must be adopted. Jack walks over to serve him. When Terry opens his wallet, Jack remarks that he can see that Terry got his money and puts in a plug for him and Vera and the money they have spent supporting Tommy. Terry says he'll see them both right, and hands Jack a bill for his drink, telling him that he can start by keeping the change. A surprised Jack holds the bill up to the light. Andy brings up the subject of Christmas Day to Liz. She says she has plans to spend it with the Queens staff. Andy is disappointed. Liz points out that there's hardly a chance she and his dad could spend it together, and is surprised when Andy says he's already spoken to Jim and he's keen on the idea. She reconsiders her plans. Gail is amazed to hear from Ivy that Don will be spending Christmas with his daughter. Bet is eavesdropping on the conversation, and is irritated when Tanya asks to speak with her. She tells Tanya that she should "never interrupt the manageress when she's earwigging on a customer's conversation. House rule." She quickly returns to her position of wiping the table next to Gail and Ivy's. She overhears Ivy tell Gail that Don is not well; that he's still battling his depression. Bet laps up every word. Kevin comes in and Terry buys him a drink. After catching up ("Still working at the garage?" "Still with Sally?"), Terry comments that Kevin could have made something of himself. He then says he won't be "hanging around this dump for very long." Bet bumps into him and apologizes by saying that she nearly tripped on his ball and chain.

At the Kabin, Alf moans to Rita about how he'll appear in the newspapers. Rita advises that he back down while he can still salvage his reputation, but Alf believes the damage is already done. Rita suggests that he think of a way to win people back.

Back at the Rovers, Tanya gives Vicky an orange juice on the house and tells her not to worry, Steve will arrive soon. She attempts to speak to Bet again but is put off for a second time. Bet smells trouble. Des and Curly have just walked in, and Terry is still present. When Terry hears Des order his pint, he whirls around. Jack hurriedly suggests that Des might want to drink in the Queens for the next couple of nights, but Des stands his ground. Bet tells Jack that only she bars people and goes to serve Des herself. Terry offers to pay for Des' drink and extends his hand, since it's the season of good will. After a moment, Des grudgingly shakes it, but then Terry says that Lisa didn't die for nowt and flashes his compensation money. Des moves to belt him, but is stopped by Curly, who tells him to ignore it and just walk away. "Come on, come on," goads Terry. "Walk away, Des," Curly repeats firmly, and Des leaves, followed by Curly. Terry looks pleased with himself and offers Kevin Des' untouched pint. Kevin refuses it and leaves.

Outside, Des is overcome with emotion, crying to Curly that he's right back to square one. "All these months trying to come to terms with it. Just when I'm starting to feel better, he turns up and she might as well be in the middle of the street!" Curly tries to comfort him, and compares Des' feelings to his when Angie left, saying the more it hurts, the more it means you cared in the first place. "You'll never get over Lisa, and what's more, you shouldn't."

Steve has finally shown his face at the Rovers. Vicky doesn't believe him when he says he tried to call but couldn't find a phone box. He storms out and Vicky chases after him. All of this is observed by Bet and Tanya. Tanya finally tells Bet about Steve. Bet is suspicious of Tanya's motive for telling her. She tells Tanya that she's not daft and had already put two and two together, and then shuts down the conversation by telling Tanya to serve.

Chez Webster, Kevin is eating fish and chips in front of the telly and ignoring Sally. Sally is tired of Kevin's behaviour and tells him that she's not having it, especially over Christmas, that it's not fair to Rosie. Kevin tells her to go ahead and sling her hook. "You better be careful," Sally warns, "because one of these days I might just do that."

Derek leads a blindfolded Mavis into the Wilton front garden. She waits while Derek rushes into the house to switch on the lights, then pulls her blindfold down and is treated to the sight of their decorated living tree. Suddenly, all of the lights on the street go out. "Derek, what have you done?" Mavis wails. Derek protests that all he did was turn on the lights.

In a darkened Rovers, candles are handed out. Bet lights her candle in time to see Steve and Vicky kissing. She's not amused.

Terry arrives home and finally holds Tommy. He tells Vera that he'll be taking Tommy to the park the next day. Vera is thrilled that Terry is finally showing an interest. After a sly look at Tommy, Terry smiles at her, and the credits roll.

Sarah Ettritch

Tommy Duckworth - DARRYL EDWARDS Mark Trevis - JOHN CAPPS
Written by - MARK WADLOW Directed by - ROMEY ALLISON

Tuesday (3637, Friday 24 December 1993)

Terry looks tense as he waits for Vera to put Tommy down for a morning nap. When Vera comes downstairs, he reminds her that he'll be taking Tommy to the park that afternoon, and asks if Tommy will need anything, like a bottle. "Bottle? What you like, you? He hasn't had a bottle for 6 months," Vera laughs. "You will get used to him Terry," Vera says, playfully touching Terry's face. Terry turns away and his eye catches a photo of Tommy on a nearby table. His face grows serious, and he looks somewhere else, guilt in his eyes.

It's Rosie's birthday. In preparation for her party, Sally is mixing something in a bowl, while Gail busies herself in the kitchen and Ivy tells Rosie, David, and Sarah Lou that she'll be taking them to the park. Sally asks Ivy if she's doing anything exciting for Christmas. Ivy replies that Don is taking them to mass and then it's Christmas dinner at Gail's, which causes Gail's head to whip around. Gail listens thoughtfully. As Ivy leads the children to the front door, Gail goes after her for a quiet word. She asks why Ivy told Sally that Don would be around on Christmas. Ivy says that Don is her business and there's no reason to broadcast anything about him.

In the back at the Rovers, Emily sorts through clothes that Bet has offered for the Crisis at Christmas drive. All the clothes are at least partially leopard-spotted! Bet points out that all of the items are warm, and Emily tactfully agrees that it's good quality clothing and will be appreciated. Jack barges in, and upon seeing all the treasures on the table, offers Emily a few shillings so he can give something to Vera (probably doing late Christmas shopping!). Emily tells him that's not the point; the clothes are to benefit the homeless and are for distribution. Bet tells him to go and get the bar ready for opening.

Percy drops into the corner shop to show Alf his receipt from Bettabuys, just so Alf will know how much Percy didn't spend in his shop -- 30 quid. "What a terrible Christmas this is," Alf sighs to Audrey and Deirdre after Percy has left. He wonders what to do with all the stock that hasn't sold. Audrey is unsympathetic and tells Alf to get something sorted, even if it means chucking £10 notes at anyone who has varicose veins. She invites Deirdre to go for a drink, but Deirdre declines, saying she'll stay and help Alf. "With what?" Audrey asks. "Folks would rather starve than shop at Mr. Humbug's." "Can I make a suggestion?" Deirdre asks.

Vera prepares Tommy for his outing to the park and Terry leaves with Tommy in a stroller. After they're gone, Vera retrieves a couple of bags from behind the sofa. Humming to herself, she sets the bags on the table and pulls out some new clothes for Tommy. "Bless 'im," she says, holding up a cute top and a pair of pants. She smiles when she reaches into another bag and pulls out a new pair of shoes. Happy as a bug in a rug, she begins her Christmas wrapping.

In Sally's kitchen, Gail spoons food into a bowl held by Ivy, who is staring blankly ahead. Gail snaps her out of it and begs Ivy to tell her what is going on with Don. She reveals to Gail that it was Don who was making the nuisance phone calls to Denise and admits that even though she asked Denise to forgive him, half of her wishes she won't. Gail moves to give her a hug, but Sally bursts in to announce that people are beginning to arrive. Sensing that she's interrupted something, she quickly apologizes and leaves them alone.

Des arrives at the Rovers with a Christmas present for Tommy. He hands it to Jack, who promises that Tommy will get it.

Back at the birthday party, the kids are playing musical chairs. Ivy drops in on Vera to see why Tommy hasn't arrived at the party. Vera says she was expecting Terry and Tommy back by now, but that she won't complain since Terry hasn't had much time with Tommy. She goes on to say that this Christmas means more to her than all the rest put together. She asks Ivy to apologize to Sally for Tommy's tardiness, and then fetches a gift for Rosie from under the Christmas tree. Ivy is amazed at the number of presents under the tree for Tommy. Vera shows Ivy the gift that Jack is giving her. "Smell this," she says, sticking the rectangular present under Ivy's nose. Ivy notices that the gift is leaking. Vera confesses that she broke it on purpose because she doesn't want to smell like a tart, and will tell Jack it's the thought that counts. They share a laugh.

At the park, the Hortons sit in their car waiting for Terry. A taxi pulls up, and Terry emerges with Tommy. Doreen rushes over and pulls Tommy from Terry's arms. Terry walks toward a few items on the ground that he unloaded from the taxi.

Bet invites Betty for a few drinks after closing. She lists the people who will be joining her for an after hours do, and says that Vicky has invited "Ronald McDonald". Vicky informs Bet that Steve won't be able to make it because he has to be back at the Queens for 10, so he'll be dropping her at the Rovers after they've had a meal. Bet and Tanya exchange glances. Bet continues to coax Betty to come to her little gathering, and Betty agrees when Bet assures her that she won't have to cook. "Is that what you bought loverboy?" she suddenly asks Vicky, who is wrapping Steve's gift. "I hope he likes it," Vicky says. "He better," Bet responds, and exchanges another look with Tanya.

Tommy has been settled in the back of the Hortons' car; Doreen seated next to him. Terry gives Doreen a packet of nappies. "I've got loads," Doreen tells him. Terry strokes a sleeping Tommy's face, saying it's "much harder for me than it is for you." He gets into the front of the car. The Hortons are upset when they discover that Terry hasn't spoken to Vera. They threaten to stop the cheque they've given him unless he tells Jack and Vera that he thinks Tommy is better off with the Hortons. They don't want to be accused of snatching Tommy.

At the Duckworths, Vera is worried about Terry and Tommy, who are now well overdue. Jack asks if Terry knew the time of the party. "Yes," Vera cries. They hear the front door open and rush into the hall. They stop short when they see that Terry is on his own. "Mam, listen to me," Terry begins. Jeff Horton walks through the front door. "Vera," he curtly says. Vera rushes past him into the street, searching for Tommy. Noticing the Hortons car, she peers in the back window and spies the empty child seat. She straightens and faces Terry, who is now outside. "What have you done with him?" she asks. "Can we talk about this inside?" Terry says. "What the 'ells going on?" Jack demands to know. "He's safe, he's with Doreen," Jeff says. Vera covers her face with her hands. "My god! Oh god, Jack!" she shouts. Jack walks over to her and they embrace, while Jeff and Terry stare into the street. Des watches the proceedings from his upstairs window, and Gail views the whole scene from the sidewalk. Terry spots Des and walks inside the house. Everyone follows him in and the door slams shut.

Alf and Audrey deliver a box of food to Emily and Percy, for her Crisis at Christmas drive. This must have been Deirdre's suggestion.

Back at the Duckworths, Terry is saying, "what am I supposed to do with a kid who doesn't even know me, Mam?" It's all too much for Vera, who collapses into a chair while Jack and Terry exchange words. Terry tries to convince them that what he's done is for their benefit, that they're too old to look after Tommy, and it's too expensive. Jack and Vera aren't buying it, Vera arguing with tears streaming down her cheeks. Jeff starts to speak, but Jack tells him to shut his trap and he backs off. "How much money is this joker giving you?" Jack quietly asks Terry. When Terry responds that it's not about money, Jack doesn't believe him and launches into a tirade about Terry's character and past deeds. He finishes by saying, "I hope the lie chokes you," and then belts him. Vera begs Jack to make Terry give Tommy back. "He won't, Vera," Jack shouts, "because there's nothing in it for him." "GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!!" he orders both Jeff and Terry. "No," Vera wails, knowing it means she's lost Tommy. She follows them into the street, begging Terry to bring Tommy back. She tries to get into the car, but it pulls away. Vera chases after it, then breaks down in defeat. Jack helps her back into the house, her sobs echoing in the street, as Des watches from his window.

Rita finishes for the day, leaving Mavis and Derek to close the Kabin. "If I don't see you across the road later, I'll definitely see you at Bet's party," she tells them. "Party?" the Wiltons say in unison. It seems they weren't invited.

Jack hasn't turned up at work. Sally comes into the pub and asks if anyone knows what's happening at the Duckworths. Gail says she plans to pop round later when it's all calmed down.

Betty goes to see what's happened to Jack. She's about to knock on the back door when she overhears Jack and Vera trying to reach the Hortons. She listens as Vera breaks down and Jack comforts her. She decides they're better left alone and returns to the Rovers.

Ivy rings Don's daughter and asks to speak to Don.

The Rovers is packed. Derek and Mavis overhear Bet invite Jim to her do. They fish for an invite but Bet doesn't bite. The phone rings, and Tanya calls Gail over. It's Ivy. After the call, Gail heads out, passing Denise who is on her way in. There is an awkward moment as Gail doesn't seem to know what to say. She quickly smiles and leaves. Audrey is quite taken with a financial adviser who is loading he up with drink. Steve and Vicky return from their meal. Steve says goodbye as Bet looks on. She shakes her head, and follows Steve from the pub. She corners him outside the taxi he's ordered and tells him that she doesn't trust him, and that a little bird has told her that he has another little bird on the side. She gives Steve a warning -- "If you damage that little bird's wings, I shall pluck ya, stuff ya, and roast ya!" She smiles, and says, "give your mom my love". After she's gone, Steve checks his watch and then asks the taxi driver to take him to Weatherfield General.

Bet's after closing party is in full swing. Ken informs Bet that they have a casualty, his eyes darting toward the pub. We are then treated to the sight of Audrey's lower legs sprawled on the floor. "How many drinks have you had?" Alf asks. He helps her up, and Jim supports her as she moves into the back.

Ivy paces her front room. Gail tells her to calm down. It seems that Don never arrived at his daughter's, and his daughter hasn't heard from him. Gail tells Ivy that Don can look after himself. "That's what I'm frightened of," Ivy says. "He thought he was looking after himself when he drove that car off the road." Gail decides to ring Martin.

Vera sits at the table, unwrapping the gifts for Tommy. She weeps into the top she's bought for him. Jack comes in and stands helplessly. He glances at Tommy's photo, then goes to Vera and puts his arm around her, but Vera's anguish is too deep, and sobs continue to rack her body. The credits roll.

Sarah Ettritch

Jeff Horton - DICKEN ASHWORTH Doreen Horton - ANNIE RAITT Tommy Duckworth - DARRYL EDWARDS Rosie Webster - EMMA COLLINGE Sarah-Louise Platt - LYNSAY KING David Platt - THOMAS ORMSON Fight Arranger - VALENTINO MUSETTI
Written by - PAUL ABBOTT Directed by - ROMEY ALLISON

Wednesday (3638, Monday 27 December 1993)

The Platts are at Ivy's to see if she needs anything from the shops. Eagle - eyed Gail notes the pillow and blankets on the couch. Ivy sends martin and David upstairs to find a little something special for the kiddies she has up there. After Gail leaves for the shop, Ivy rushes to make the couch tidy.

Raquel is pouring the tea as Betty walks into the Rovers' back room. Raquel wants Bet to get going as she had promised to accompany Raquel to the sales. Betty opines that red stickers on things doesn't make them cheaper but Raquel says that the law states that sale items have to be less than retail. Emily comes in to tell them that the clothes and money they donated to the Crisis at Christmas went to good use. The clothes were all distributed and the money bought some food. Raquel seems puzzled by something.

Tanya is walking down the road as Gail pops out of the shop. She tells her she is the woman she was looking for - well, nearly. She wonders if Gail could ask Alma if the flat over the café is up for rent. Gail tells her that Alma is at the café now, so she can go ask her herself. Tanya says she hardly knows her and Gail says she knows her as well as she knows Gail and heads off.

Puzzled Raquel wonders what money Emily was talking about. Bet says it was just a few bob. Raquel is upset that nobody said anything about cash as she just gave some old clothes. Betty tells her she gave her share of Christmas tips as she likes to help those who haven't got it. Bet says she sees it as an investment. If she ever becomes homeless, and she has cut that line very close in her time, she would like the Emily Bishops of this world on her side. Then, Raquel says she thought Bet was saving up for that jacket and if she will still be going shopping with her. Bet says she is still coming looking. That pleases Raquel.

At the shop, Ken and Jim are talking to Alf about work. Jim is looking forward to getting back to work. Denise comes up and tells them they're all as bad as each other - one is open on a bank holiday and the other can't wait to get back to work. She then offers to buy Jim a pint at lunch. Ken goes off and tells Alf to tell Dierdre he will see her later. Denise puts her purchases down and Alf tells her he feels as though he is in a Noel Coward play, what with Ken and Dierdre and Denise and Jim. She says me and Jim what? Well, you know, I clocked you and he on Christmas eve and now you're buying him drinks. She then tells him that if she counted the number of men who bought Audrey drinks at Christmas, it wouldn't be on one hand. Alf wonders what that means. Denise says that it actually means nothing but were she to assume the opposite, she could make it sound like major gossip. Alf figures she is over reacting to which Denise says it is a tricky thing to be a woman on her own. She is either boring or just waiting to nick somebody's husband. Alf says hey now I never said that and she says yes but there are one or two around there who don't have Alf's balanced view of women.

Bet is at the Duckworth's to give Jack his wages and to see if she had the facts right - they have lost Tommy. She wonders how that could happen and Jack venomously says because terry couldn't be bothered to make the effort. He then asks if she remembers the old joke about selling the granny for a tuppence and says terry got a lot more than a tuppence. He tells her to give him ten minutes for a wash up and he'll be at the Rovers but she tells him to get things sorted first. He would like the break and in walks Vera, all fired up about finding the Hortons' whereabouts from their local. Jack's face is the picture of grief as we hear vera on the phone trying to get the local's phone number. He asks what good that is going to do and she says someone might know where they have gone. Bet places her hand on Jack's shoulder in support and tells him not to rush in. She tells vera to pop in for a drink later but Vera says she will be too busy. Bet gives a slight shake of her head as she goes.

Andy is at the garage to give Jim a message - a surprise party for Aunt Eileen and Jim's Mum wants to know today if they can make it. Jim goes home to phone and tells Andy to put the kettle on at the garage. Kevin walks from the office, looking for a part, and Andy asks if he's another one that doesn't believe in bank holidays. Kevin says that he would love to be home with his family but he has a fine to pay. Andy says he thought Steve was paying it but Kev says he told Steve to get stuffed. So what's your problem then asks Andy. Kevin says that if it was him, he would have insisted. Andy goes ahh! but then again, with Steve, Kevin isn't dealing with a model genius .

Jim and Bet are outside the MacDonalds' door discussing a few hours of pub work for Jim. Jim leaves, Steve comes out the door and Bet's eyes go mean. She grabs hold of his jacket and lets him know she meant what she said the other day, he hurts Vicky and he gets hurt. Off goes Steve as Raquel comes up wanting Bet to hurry it up. Bet says it's just a new skirt she's after not a flaming mercy dash then links arms with her and they're off.

Gail serves Ivy a nice cuppa and wonders if Don might be with the lady he had been seeing. Ivy says no, she has already tried there and he hasn't been there since the accident. Gail tells her that she and martin think ivy should call the police. Ivy wonders what they can tell her that she doesn't know already, where they can look that she hasn't - except in a ditch. Gail says Ivy needs to know. Ivy tells her that during the night, she thought about those stories where missing people's family sense whether the missing one is alive or not. She says that she and Don have lived like a pair of lodgers, they don't use the same bed, only talk to each other when necessary and one night, Don brought some fish and chips home and she hoped that this meant she was something to Don but she then found out about the phone calls. She just can't sense Don. Gail tells her that the police are trained for this.

Mad rush at the sales as Raquel and Bet are jostled and bumped while trying to shop. Raquel shows Bet a dress wondering what would go with it. Bet says a bathing cap as it's too tight. Raquel says it's meant to be tight and Bet says it would be tight on a flaming rock python!

Vera is still on the phone talking to someone saying she needs to get in touch with the Hortons.

Bet and Raquel walk past a homeless girl asking for spare change. Raquel turns back, and tells the girl that the coat she has on used to be hers and it's a good one - won't lose its colour as it weren't cheap and that it suits the girl. Bet tells the girl she is very sorry, gives some change and carts Raquel off asking Raquel how she thought that made the girl feel and sometimes she worries about Raquel.

Ivy is on the phone to police to report a missing person.

Raquel and Bet are looking for a way to get home . Both are tired and cold. Up pulls a large rig asking for directions. Bet tells him she doesn't know the street he wants but Raquel stops her and says that yes, she thinks the street is near where they are going. If he gives them a lift, they can show him where to go. Raquel goes to get in but Bet stops her saying a- she doesn't know where the street is, b- she doesn't accept lifts from strangers and she couldn't get up in that thing if she tried. Raquel says yes you can and up she goes into the cab. Disgruntled, Bet gets up there despite the high red heels and tight clothing. Raquel says that this is better than a taxi but the trucker says he doesn't think her Mum is so convinced. lol

Derek is reciting the lunch order to Betty and asks if she has that. She says yes, she heard it but she doesn't have it. Just cold stuff as she didn't want to be cooking through Christmas. Jim, resplendent in the blue jays shirt, is telling denise that alf doesn't mean anything. She knows but it rankles a bit. Derek is still on at betty about the lack of warm food and points to the menu. sHe tells him that was last week's menu and he says he feels he has every right in pops jim saying betty says cold sandwiches is what's for offer. Derek nods and orders 2 corned beef and one salad.

Steve asks andy who took the phone message from Allison. Andy says jim did and that she would meet steve at the house. Steve freaks saying that it was supposed to be at the queens. Andy tells steve he won't help him out with the lies and leaves out the door where Vicky is. She says steve was supposed to meet her half an hour ago and they have 20 minutes to get to the film. Steve begs off saying he thinks he got some bad food at the queens. He invites her in for a bit.

The police car pulls up outside Ivy's and two constables get out.

The truck of the year for 1992 pulls up and stops by the Rovers. Bet and Raquel get out while telling the trucker to keep going and then the street he wants is to the right - somewhere down there. He thinks living over a pub must be all right and with 3 big honks of the horn, goes off. Raquel thinks he was a lovely man but Bet is still miffed.

Jack is becoming more agitated as vera is still on the phone trying to find the Hortons. He comes over and puts his finger over the phone to stop the connection. She asks why he did that as she thought she had found someone who could help them. She thinks she can reason with the hortons but jack tells her, they planned it, timed it and as far as they know, terry is with them now. Vera says if jack hadn't chucked terry out, she could have talked to him, made him see sense. Jack explodes saying no she couldn't have - the only chance she would have had to get across to that [prat was if she had more money than the hortons. She cries saying she just wants tommy back. Jack knows this and they embrace. He tells her that tommy's presents being around isn't helping any and she says she's not getting rid of them. He just wants to put them away and out of sight.

Alf is defending his opening on a bank holiday to mavis at the shop. Sarah Louise is sat on the counter while martin is looking at something. Phyllis comes in wondering what curly watts has been up to as there is a police car outside . martin hears this and gets sarah lou off the counter. Gail comes in asking martin to talk to the police as they want to talk to as many people as possible. Alf sees her and asks how she is. She pulls out a 100 watt smile and says fine. Alf then talks on about how much he's taken in that day.

Down the stairs of the rovers comes Raquel, resplendent in a very tight dress. Betty tells her it's lovely and bet asks her to get the mixers up from the floor. Raquel goes to bend to pick them up but has a little trouble in the tight short outfit. She eventually bends in a most unmodel like manner and betty and bet have a smile over this. She turns to see them quickly turn away but, from her face, she knows they were doing something.

Jack is in the shop getting a few things when des comes in to him wondering what is going on. Jack asks him what he thinks is going on. Des tells him he is really sorry and he supposes tommy didn't get his present. Jack says no and he didn't get the ones he and v had for him either. Des wants to talk more but jack defers him saying he will have to wait his turn, he has vera to look after and he can imagine how that is.

Andy is watching football when steve comes in. tells steve that Vicky says he is in bed poorly and steve says he didn't really plan it that way. He's been trying to get hold of Allison but she is due in 15 minutes. Andy goes off for a shower telling steve he'll try to make it last 20 minutes.

Ken is finishing his pint while waiting for dierdre to show up. Jim talks to Vicky about school, telling her to enjoy it as she'll miss it when she's out. He invites her to go out for a curry with he and andy. She tells him to ask bet for her as she'll be more inclined to say yes to jim. Phyllis is watching Raquel and her new tight outfit and makes a comment. Raquel begs her pardon and Phyllis says face it, you can hardly breathe in that dress. Raquel says to not be so cheeky , nobody cracks jokes about phyllis' blue hair. No, because it's purple is the response. Yeah well so is our toilet seat cover. Phyllis is left sputtering at that one. Bet is at the back of the bar quite happy until she sees something - "oh my god!" betty hears her and asks if bet knows him. Bet says he drives the biggest taxi she knows of and then tells Raquel she has some explaining to do. Raquel; turns to the bar and, shocked, says hello and asks if he found the road. He says yes, eventually no thanks to her. She offers to buy him a drink and he says a pint of bitter - might help pay for the diesel. He sees bet, touches his cowboy hat and says hello there. Bet coolly responds with a how do you do. Raquel says he never told them his name - Charlie Whelan. She never told him hers - Raquel. You're kidding- after the film star? She tells him not to say anything cheeky but he says he might, after a few pints.

Allison is at the MacDonalds for steve. Andy lets her in. the next knock on the door shows Vicky who is there to go for the curry with he and jim. Andy lets her in and the two women meet. Both assume they are there for andy but Vicky introduces herself as Steve's girlfriend. Allison finds this most interesting and raises from her chair as steve comes in the room. Vicky is amazed to see him up and feeling better. Andy mumbles about how getting better quick runs in the family. Steve, with the deer in the headlights look, is greeted by Allison who says that Vicky has said she is steve's girlfriend. Ah! Now there is a truly sickly looking fellow! lol

Judith Cooper

Charlie Whelan - JOHN ST RYAN
Written by PAUL ABBOTT Directed by BRIAN MILLS

Thursday (3639, Wednesday 29 December 1993)

Friday (3640, Friday 31 December 1993)

It's New Year's Eve, and things are hopping everywhere. In a very noisy Queen's, Liz asks Steve where he's off to, and he tells her he'll be at a party at Andy's. Liz remarks that Steve will probably be having a solo night, and warns him not to ask for her sympathy, since he clearly "blew it" with both Vicky and Alison. She hopes he's learned his lesson. Steve doesn't seem the least bit concerned and feels quite sure that he'll be able to talk Alison around.

Meanwhile, Curly's trolling for dates, apparently unsuccessfully. He calls a woman named Monica, who doesn't seem to know who he is, but he invites her to the party anyway.

At the Platts' Martin and Gail are getting ready for the party, and are waiting for the babysitter to arrive. Martin informs Sarah-Lou that she can't go the party with him -- she's too young.

Back at Curly's, he asks Andy about Alison, but Andy says she's finished with Steve. A disappointed Curly makes it clear that he was really hoping that Alison would not only come, she'd bring a bunch of her nurse friends.

Next door, Ivy is the telephone to the police, asking whoever is on the other end if they've heard or seen anything of Don. She hangs up in tears when the answer given is clearly negative.

The Rovers Return is very busy, and when Jim asks for a pint, he's coldly told by Bet that he'll have to wait his turn. He asks what he's done to offend her, and Bet retorts that it all has to do with his Steve. Jim pleads that Steve's behaviour has nothing to do with him. At a nearby table, Alf gives Audrey some money to get the drinks in because his gout is really playing up, causing a lot of pain. As Audrey goes off to the bar, Emily commiserates when Alf describes the "six-inch needle" he feels someone is sticking down his big toe. Her sympathy quickly turns to disgust when Alf removes his shoe and sock so that Emily can view the offending digit! She is more than relieved when Audrey returns to the table and shrieks at Alf to put his shoe back on.

Behind the bar, Tanya and Raquel exchange remarks -- they're both concerned about Vicky, who is spending her New Year's Eve without Steve, and feeling "shattered."

Denise emerges from the salon onto a darkened street and cautiously looks about. She sees Don's cab parked outside of his home, and when she notices that Don is still sitting in it, she hurriedly crosses the road and goes into the pub.

Ivy looks alarmed when she hears someone at the door, and is clearly relieved when she sees Don come into the living room. After a few seconds of uncomfortable silence, she invites him to take his coat off. "I knew you'd come back," she finally says. She asks if he'd like something to eat, but Don wants to talk.

Back at the Rover's, Vicky watches television by herself. Tanya stops for a few moments to tell Vicky how sorry she is about Steve. Vicky admits that she was apparently the last one to know that Steve was playing around, and hints that Tanya was probably aware of what was going on too. Tanya doesn't respond to that, although she does admit that she's seen enough of that sort of behaviour to recognize it. She asks if she can get Vicky a drink from the bar, but Vicky declines. When Tanya leaves, Vicky reaches under the couch cushion, pulls out a bottle of vodka, and pours herself another large drink.

Don tells Ivy that while he was away, he really thought about starting all over again somewhere else, but ultimately he came back to her because he realized he wasn't being fair. Now he wants to repair the damage he's done. Ivy immediately wonders if it's Denise he wants to make amends to, and she warns him that Denise wants nothing further to do with him. Don suspected as much, but he insists he wants to sort himself out and make a clean slate. "And you believe this -- what you're saying?" questions Ivy. "I do," Don replies, "but I need your help. I need you to stand by me." Ivy isn't sure she can make that sort of promise.

An anxious-looking Denise asks for a drink, and when Bet sees her expression, she immediately asks if everything is alright. Denise tells her that she just saw Don in his cab, outside, and she's clearly not happy that he's back, given that she was just starting to get the whole nasty business out of her thoughts. "What if he starts again?" she asks Bet. Bet assures her that that's not likely to happen, now that Don's been found out, but she assures Denise that if Don starts anymore funny business, Denise is to let her know. "I'll sort him!"

Jack thanks Des for trying to be a friend to Vera, but Des believes he only made things worse. Jack disagrees and tells him that Vera seemed in better spirits after Des left.

Curly asks Bet for some beer to take away and six packets of crisps. Denise asks if he's having a party, and Curly says that he is -- and she's invited to come. Denise says she isn't in a partying mood, but Bet tells her she thinks it would do her good to go.

Des goes to the Duckworths' door, and when Vera sees him standing on the stoop, she invites him in. He immediately begins apologizing for the other day, but Vera won't hear of it. He tries to comfort her by telling her that she did everything she could for Tommy. Vera listens, and then tells Des how sorry she is now that she wouldn't allow him to see the child. Now she feels that she has nothing to live for. Des reminds her that she had Tommy for 24 hours a day for nearly a year -- that's something the Hortons can't take away from her. Vera pours them both a drink, and when they raise their glasses, she laughingly warns him not to wish her a happy New Year.

The party at Curly's is becoming loud and crowded. Andy asks Steve if Alison is coming, and Steve, smooth as always, informs his brother that he's talked her around and she'll be there soon. Meanwhile, people are swaying to the music, as Gail dances with Jim and Martin squires Denise around the room. Steve's face lights up when Alison comes through the door, but it falls when he sees the man standing behind her, and when Alison informs him that she brought someone else -- she "meant" what she said the other day, and they're finished. The countdown to midnight begins, and on the stroke of twelve, people kiss and embrace. As the strains of "Auld Lang Syne" begin, Steve looks on unhappily as Alison kisses her date, so he leaves.

Bet and Vicky drink a toast to the New Year, but Vicky's glass is filled with seltzer (as in "Alka") to counteract her previous imbibing. As she says "yuk" after a mouthful, Bet laughs and tells her it serves her right.

Jim asks Denise to dance, and when she refuses, Jim begins moaning that he feels like some sort of social outcast. Denise reminds him that he's still married as she nods towards the door. Jim turns to see Liz, carrying a tray of food. He rushes forward to greet her, planting a kiss on her lips and expressing surprise to see her there. Liz laughingly informs him that Andy rang and begged her to bring any left-overs there might be from celebrations at the Queen's. Jim compliments her perfume.

Back at the Brennans' house, Ivy tells Don that he can't keep leaving and coming back every six months. She's not strong enough to take it, and she's worn out from all the covering-up to friends and family. Don swears that this time he's back for good, and begs her for one more chance. "Trust me, Ivy... please." Ivy doesn't seem to know how to respond, and looks about the room until her eyes settle on the statue of Mary. Obviously reminded of the Christian ethic of forgiveness, Ivy agrees to stand by him, "just one more time."

Back a the party, the music is blaring and Curly is afraid that Ivy will complain. Liz is ready to leave, and Curly, who has spotted Don's cab outside, wonders if he might be recruited to take her home. Jim thinks they ought to leave the Brennans alone, and he offers to see Liz home. She kisses Andy goodnight, and the pair leave.

Vera turns the pages of an old photo album and stares at pictures of Terry when he was a small child. Jack comes downstairs, wondering why Vera isn't in bed, since it's gone 2:00 AM. Vera tells him that she was unable to sleep, and when Jack sees the photo album, he gently takes it from her, remarking that it would be better if the book was stored somewhere in the loft, out of sight. Vera sadly reminisces on Terry's childhood -- "he was a lovely kid," she reminds Jack, to which he cynically responds, "ay, Vee, for the first month." Vera's pain is palpable when she admits that she's been wrong all these years, and that she's sorry now that she defended Terry simply because he was her flesh and blood. Jack tells her she has nothing to apologize for, that any mother would do the same thing. She remarks that even Des thought more of little Tommy than Terry ever did. Jack hugs and kisses Vera in a show of tenderness we rarely see between the Duckworths, and he promises her that they'll get through this as he urges her to come to bed and get some sleep.

Jim and Liz sit on a park bench in front of a water fountain on a deserted street while Jim admits to her that he's glad to see the back of 1993. He can only hope that the new year will be better. Mind you, he realizes that it was a good one for Liz, what with her becoming a new landlady for Newton & Ridley. She reminds him that there's more to life than becoming a landlady and running the Queen's, and her biggest wish is that it didn't have to be at the expense of her family. "So do I," agrees Jim, "but there's one thing we can't do, and that's turn the clock back, okay?" Liz wonders if turning the clock back would make any difference, and Jim admits that he thinks it would -- "in fact, I know it would."

We return to the party at Curly's, where his guests are clearly feeling no pain. Gail is draped over Martin as they slowly waltz, but Martin feels they'd better get home soon, before the babysitter begins to complain. Des apologizes for spilling red wine on the carpet, and Raquel interrupts a heavy snogging session when she carries dishes into the kitchen. Des approaches her from behind and wraps his arms around her, suggesting that she walk him home and come in for a coffee. Raquel responds that she knows where his coffee leads to, so she'll pass on the invitation and see him tomorrow.

At the Queen's, Liz retrieves a full bottle of whiskey from the bar and gives it to Jim. He asks how much he owes her, but she insists that it's on her. She thanks him for walking her home, and Jim tells her that he wishes things weren't the way they are between them. Liz responds that she feels the same way. "What are you trying to say?" asks Jim. Liz makes it clear that she wants Jim to stay. "Are you sure?" Jim asks gently. "Yeah," replies Liz. "I want you to stop the night. I want you."

And on that romantic note, the camera pans to the Queen's sign on the wall, and the music comes up, indicating the end to another episode. I hope you all enjoyed it.

Heather Morlan

Alison Rathbone: RACHEL SMITH
Written by: PHIL WOODS Directed by BRIAN MILLS



Written by Diane Johnston, Anita Belanger, Lori Berger Hegyi, ronniecat, Heather Morlan, Ruth Hempsey, Libby Seekings, Judith Cooper, Tammy Mitchell

 

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