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2009 -
JANUARY 5
It's New Year's Eve and Fat Brenda's pulled a
sickie at Streetcars. Neither Steve nor Lloyd want to work the
switch so they shut up shop and head to the pub. Becky's done up to
the nines in a leopard print top which proves she'll be landlady any
day now, the signs are clearly there. Beehive? Check. Ear-rings the
size of dinner plates? Check. Attitude and gum? Check. Tart? Check.
With a heart? Check. Leopard print clothing?
Checkety-check-check. As the clocks chime 12, Liz leads the
regulars out of the Rovers onto the cobbles to see the firework
display. With whizzes and bangs, there's explosions going on all
over the place, especially in Jack's backyard where Aunty Pam and
Darryl are blown up when the chip oil sets on fire and blows up
Jack's outside loo. Fortunately, no pigeons were harmed in the
making of this scene but Aunty Pam ends up in th'ospital briefly and
Darryl's a bit shocked.
As if having his khazi blown to bits
wasn't enough of a bad start to his New Year, Jack's got company in
the shape of Tyrone's mum. With her pink hair, fake tan, Croatian
breast implant that exploded on a microlight, Jackie Dobbs returns
this week causing ten kinds of trouble for Molly, Ty, Jack and Pam.
The reunion of Jackie with Deirdre in the Rovers was one I'd been
looking forward to for ages but when it happened, even written by
the mighty pen of Jonathan Harvey, it lacked the “scene of the year
so far award” that it could well have been. But still, Jackie's back
and if Deirdre's got any sense, she'll go into hiding until she's
gone. Molly's trying to cope with having the
mother-in-law-to-be from hell living with her as she plans her
wedding next week and her dad only goes and has his appendix
explode. Poor Diggory.
Best story of the week was Steve
finding out about Liz and Lloyd. As the pair of them lock lips up in
Lloyd's flat, Steve storms in demanding to speak to Lloyd about the
state of his love life. Should he choose Becky or ‘Chelle? Michelle
or Becks? Anyway, as he's sitting in the chair at Lloyd's
flat, Liz is hiding right behind him and Steve's nostrils start
twitching. “What's that cheap, sickly perfume?” he asks Lloyd. “It's
familiar, somehow”. But he doesn't put two and two together until he
spies Liz's Dolly Parton keyring and then fists fly in the flat. Liz
comes up from behind the chair, surrendering to her son shouting at
her, with her arms in the air. “I was born between those
legs!” he yells at Lloyd and Liz stands by and watches the two
mummy's boys battle it out. When Steve finally leaves the flat,
disgusted and disgruntled, Liz hugs Lloyd to her with his head
nestled in Liz's mighty cleavage. A truly wonderful comic scene.
Back at the Rovers, Steve is so distraught that he collapse
on the sofa with a glass of wine and Michelle and forgets completely
that tonight was the night he was going to dump her and take up with
Becky. Becky hadn't forgotten though and she takes to her bed with
half a plastic bottle's worth of cider insider her and Hayley's
words of wisdom when Becky begged her to have faith. “Have faith?”
she asked incredulous. “In Steve McDonald?”
Elsewhere, Dev
falls deeply in love with Tara but when Amber finds out that Tara's
leaving Weatherfield, she knows she has to stop her and keep her dad
happy. So, Amber and Darryl sabotage Tara's taps in the flat so that
Tara has to call Dev in see to her plumbing. But the plan backfires
when Tara thinks Dev has plundered her plumbing on purpose and she
blows hot and cold with a shower of abuse. Amber then comes clean to
Tara who apologies to Dev who tells her he loves her. See, it all
worked out in the end. Well almost, but Tara still intends to leave
Dev and Weatherfield for the bright lights of Arthur's Seat and Auld
Reekie.
Across the cobbles, Gary Windass winds up Tina by
following her around and calling her name. David's getting jealous
and angsty and although Tina says she doesn't like it, she's not
exactly ignoring the mating call of the Windass as much as she
could. Tina's dad Joe also has problems this week when his money
worries set in so deep that even asks Jason Grimshaw about a
labouring job with Bill Webster.
And that's just about that
for this week.
Coronation Street writers this week were
Damon Rochefort, Peter Whalley, Jonathan Harvey and Simon
Crowther.
Glenda -- Blogging away merrily at http://flamingnora.blogspot.com
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