Coronation Street Weekly
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Weekly updates with pictures on the Coronation
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2008 -
JANUARY 14
Cast your mind back, if you will, to last week and
the Lake District and Liam in hospital after falling from the fell.
He makes a speedy recovery, as injured people are wont to do in a
soap when they're needed for a script change on t'other side of the
Pennines, and Liam limps over the cobbles on crutches. Maria doesn't
want Carla to know that loverboy's back in town and lies to her
while trying on wedding dresses in town. But Carla's out for a spot
of lunch with catalogue Tony “my knight in shining Armani”, the one
with the weird staring eyes, and spies Maria through the window of
the wedding frock shop. There's an altercation, as you can imagine,
the likes of which the Vincent Malone Bridal Boutique has never seen
before and Maria does her best to warn Carla from chasing her Liam.
“Stay away from me, yer vile cow,” says Maria but let's be honest,
she's in a no-win situation. Maria's like a cuddly hamster facing up
to the robo-rottweiler that goes by the name of Ms Connor. Carla
pulls out all the stops when she finds out Liam's back on the Street
and cooks him a bacon, sausage and cheeky cheese casserole just like
his Irish mammy used to make. “You'd best buckle up love,” Carla
warns Maria. “You're in for a bumpy ride.” One of the best lines of
the week came from Michelle when Maria told her she'd brought the
wedding forward to next month. “If there are cracks in your
relationship, you can't paper over them with confetti,” she said.
Ooh, I liked that one a lot.
From one side of the Connor clan
to the other, less exciting side. Indeed, it's to the side that
sucks the life out of my telly screen whenever they appear as
Michelle and Ryan tremble in the back room the pub over Nick the
stalker and the terrible truth. “You'll always be my baby,” Michelle
tells the boy who isn't her son. Poor Ryan, finding out the truth
made him miss his own 16th birthday party in the back room of the
pub and his mates Tommo, Phil, Monster and Ig had turned up for the
bash too. Tupperware bowls full of beef flavoured crisps with the
stench of the inside of a dog's kennel sat untouched as the boys
left Ryan and Michelle to cry on the sofa.
Over in the
Duckies, Jack and Vera had an offer accepted on the house of their
dreams at number 42 Pemberton Gardens Blackpool. Better still, they
found a buyer for their own house when Molly and Tyrone offered them
the asking price. As the Duckies started to pack up their boxes,
Molly and Tyrone told Paul he could stay on as lodger if he wanted
as long as he paid rent. But, dear readers, the Duckies won't be
going anywhere as Veronica Duckworth (née Burton), yes that's Vera
to you and me, will pop her clogs and die in next week's update.
Better buy that big box of hankies right now, in fact, if you want
to start crying it'd be a good idea to start about
Tuesday.
Now then, all soap actors are born equal but some
are more equal than others. Yes, this was the week when David's
girlfriend Tina, who works in the pound shop, introduced him to the
delights of reading Animal Farm and drinking cheap vodka. Tina
whisked David upstairs while Gail was at work, seduced him with
“Kiss me, David, show me who's boss”, and removed him of his
innocence in one fell swoop. Not bad for her second episode but
what'll she do in her third? She's looking promising, is Tina,
ranting on about the “dangers of a naïve working class,” while
wearing big loopy earrings. David's now sporting a lovebite the size
of Barney the rabbit on his neck and has taken to eaten eggy bread.
Gail can only look on, quite bemused and probably relieved that her
son's hormones have found a release.
Meanwhile, Kevin was in
a suit for his day in court after beating up John Stape on the
cobbles. Afraid he's going to be sent down for a long stretch he
tells Sally where the stopcock is in case she should need it while
he's gone. And Sally might need to stopcock after all as Kev was
sent down to the big house for 28 days although he'll probably only
serve 14 and come back with a suntan. In some wonderful scenes, Rita
took up the mantle of Sally's mentor and mother for a much needed
heart-to-heart over the teapot at the kitchen table. Rita even
helped sort out Rosie and Sophie from beating each other to a pulp.
Dev had some sage words for Sally when he heard about Kevin in jail.
“I dunno…” he said, “… you get someone in to teach you English Lit
and your life turns into a Shakespearean tragedy.”
Forsooth.
And as Jamie and Violet wondered what to call their
baby, Lauren suggested calling it Bernard Matthew in homage to the
turkey baster. I can only agree.
Coronation Street writers
this week were Carmel Morgan, Jonathan Harvey (two episodes), David
Lane and Julie Jones.
And that's just about that for this
week.
Glenda -- Blogging away merrily at
http://flamingnora.blogspot.com
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