On with the first of the episodes for Friday, August 1:

"Don't you start siding with that low-rent trollop!" Yes, it's dear Clarissa, trying to dissuade Harry from going to the Rovers to apologise to Liz. "I'm not the one who's barred," he points out. "And I'm damned if I'm going to walk half a mile for a drink just because you are!"

Inside the Rovers, Becky tells Michelle she thinks it's a shame that Michelle and Steve have split up. Becky thinks they were a great couple - like gin and tonic. "Brilliant together but no good on your own." Michelle points out that it's no good if you can't trust someone, though she admits she misses him. "The man that I miss and the man that he is are two different people."

Dev is doing his own Bollywood dance outside the shop, looking like a man who's won seven lotteries at once. Harry asks him what's made him so happy and Dev explains that after a long time in the wilderness, he has finally been dealt a decent hand, only the all-time queen of Bollywood, Miss Nina Adani. He tells Harry how he's come across Nina.

Janice is in the salon and asks Audrey if she's all set for her two-day binge. Audrey has no plans to binge. She's going to taste a bit of the civilized French culture. Janice doesn't think French culture is civilized and reminds Audrey that she and Roger were there just last year. Audrey can't wait to get in that hotel room and shake the dust of Weatherfield off her feet. This gives Janice a chance to get in a dig about the gite - was it too expensive? Audrey explains that it was too far out of town and that she and Bill are now staying in [cue posh Audrey voice] a top hotel. Snap! "See yer fer breakfast," Janice smirks. "Did you get that cheap deal on the internet as well?" Poor Audrey. Does anyone at all think this is going to go well?

Prem turns up in the shop. He has something he wants to put to Dev over a drink. While they wait for Molly to return so Dev can get away, Prem tells him he could do with a new floor. Once a lino salesman . . .

In the pub, the French booze raiding party discusses the problems of driving on the Continent. Prem tells Dev that drinking in a pub is a treat for him because Nina thinks pubs are common. Tony comes in and Dev introduces the two men. Dev shows off by telling Liz to keep the change when he pays for the drinks.

The cross-channel tourists load up the car. Audrey has masses of luggage. Janice tells her they'll have to leave four boxes of wine behind, thanks to her. They get into the car and the two women settle into the back seat. Janice, still sniping at Audrey, says she's going to start the weekend the way she means to carry on and cracks open a can of lager. Audrey sighs.

Prem is promoting the formation of an Asian business group - something to help network, hold seminars, offer advice. Dev thinks it sounds good. Prem invites him to join them. "I mean, there'd be capital outlay initially, but it's all tax deductible," he says. His phone goes. It's Nina. He says Nina wants to know if Dev would like to come round for dinner. There's a young lady there she'd like Dev to meet.

Steve is explaining to Amy that there has to be a baddie in every story. Michelle watches from the doorway. They send her up to get ready for bed and Steve and Michelle have a quick chat which seems friendly enough to start with. But Michelle cuts him off. She hasn't come in for a chat. "Could you just read your daughter her story and then go, please!"

Sally's got the decorating magazines out. Kevin's worried about the money. "I've told you - I'm not doing too well at the minute." Rosie offers to help out. She's had a promotion and a pay rise. But Kevin says he doesn't want any of Tony Gordon's blood money. Sally asks where he thinks her wages and Rosie's wages come from. Kevin says things should look up because he's got a load of the cabs booked in for tomorrow.

Amber criticises Dev's clothing and upsets him by comparing his clothes to Ken's. Amber has no time for dinner parties where people sit round for two hours talking about house prices and school league tables. Dev says she'll understand when she's a bit more sophisticated. She asks if he's going prepared. "You need some you-know-whats if you're going to a party," she says. "It's a man's responsibility after all . . ." Dev begins a sharp reply, but Amber picks up a bunch of flowers and hands them to him. They high five. "Don't wait up now," he giggles.

Clarissa and Harry are in the pub. Liz tells her she's barred but Harry asks her to give Clarissa a chance. "I'm very sorry for what I did. It was extremely childish. I don't know what came over me," Clarissa says in a tone that makes it clear she doesn't mean a word. Liz accepts the apology reluctantly. Harry offers to buy everyone a drink.

Dev arrives at Prem and Nina's house and is introduced to Lisa, who's nearly as tall as he is. Conversation is a bit awkward. Lisa is Prem's accountant. She will do all the auditing for the new Asian organisation.

Deirdre asks whether Clarissa meant the apology. Liz isn't sure that she did. Deirdre says she's in training for widowhood and tells Liz about Ken spending every waking hour working on his novel. Harry looks towards the bar and Liz preens, only to be told off by Deirdre. "When will you ever learn?" Liz says Harry can't keep his eyes off her. She says Clarissa has to work 24/7 just to keep Harry interested.

At the dinner table, Lisa asks Dev about his businesses. Prem tells her that Dev is at an interesting point in his career - does he go on acquiring shops or move into a bigger arena. Lisa says he can always come to her for financial advice. Dev doesn't see the look Nina gives the two of them.

Harry and Clarissa are ready to go. They're sorting out old stuff. "There's a lot of old tat we can kiss goodbye to," she says, staring straight at Liz.

The dinner party is at the brandy stage. Nina asks Dev to help her clear up while Prem and Lisa talk shop in the living room. When they are alone in the kitchen, she tells Dev that Lisa would make someone a good wife. She wonders if Dev is happy as he is, but Dev says that would change if the right person came along. "And until she comes along, what do you do for your . . . amusement?" Nina coos. Dev is confused. "I'd hate to think of you all alone," Nina says. "Only I've noticed there is a sort of chemistry between us. It was there the moment we met. Unless I've got it completely wrong." Dev looks at her. "Are you saying what I think you're saying?" "Why do you think I invited you here?" Nina asks. "If you're ever at a loose end and want a little no-strings fun - which no-one need ever find out about - [she slips a piece of paper into his jacket] give me a ring."

Margaret Carr

And we open in the Street with Harry trying to pull Dev's leg over the Bollywood star but Dev is having none of it - after all he respects her husband and nothing is going to happen (I am sure we are all pleased by that!). Unusually for Friday part 2 this episode is clearly taking place a day after the previous episode - has Corrie got out of step with itself?

Liz is pressing Lloyd for information on Harry and Clarissa - he does not believe everything in the garden is rosy - they are always arguing - she suggests they might have something new to argue about. Lloyd asks who that might be then? After Liz goes Vern wants to know what is going on - but Lloyd is giving little away. Then Lloyds mobile rings - he responds that he already has a contract - but then he is offered a discount and starts sounding more interested.

Prem turns up in Dev's shop with flooring samples and then realises he has forgotten the best ones. He will pop them in later. He then asks if Dev enjoyed last night - and Lisa in particular. He hand Dev Lisa's card in case he is need of ... "any financial advice". {For those only reading and not watching I am sure there is more going on than can be seen by the naked eye}.

And a little later Nina herself arrives with the missing samples - as if! Apparently Prem was called away to his warehouse and she had nothing to do and was waiting for something interesting to happen. She has if he has given any thought to her offer. Luckily for Dev a customer comes in. He reminds her that she is married and then she says since when has that stopped anyone? She tells him the he likes her and the feeling is mutual - and anyway if Pre found out he responds? She tells him not to think about him. Well of course she says if it is not going to he harmless fun then perhaps we should just forget about it. They are about to kiss when another customer arrives. Nina tells him to let her know and she looks at him as if she is about to catch fire. Dev looks like a wreck.

Sal is going shopping and Kev is sitting on the pavement with nothing to do - he is waiting for Streetcars cars to arrive for their servicing. Lloyd finally turns up - but no cars. There has been a change of plan - Premium Motors had offered a 20% discount and Kev admits he cannot compete. Lloyd has it guaranteed for a year so it is not just a flash in the pan, it will save some real money. Kev tells Sal he is off round to Premium Motors to talk to them and find out what is going on.

Dev phones Nina and tells her that he cannot do it - there is too much at stake if it goes wrong. He reassures her that she is wonderful but he could not handle it. At the other end Nina looks thoughtful as the call ends and she smiles to herself.

At Premium Motors Kev finds that Jimmy Dockerson - that friend of Tony's appears to be in charge. Dockerson denies all knowledge of Tony and any plan (but boys and girls we all know he is lying and so does Kev). As soon as Kev departs Jimmy grabs his mobile and phones Tony.

Liz follows Clarissa into the bookies and playing the dumb blonde asks Harry for a recommendation for a good horse to bet. Harry says it does not work like that - either way it would do him no good. Liz threatens to pop back when he more time to explain about putting bets on - Liz is sure that a couple of sessions with Harry will enable her to crack it. Clarissa is watching all of this and is clearly just a little wound up.

Fiz and John talk to each other politely outside the factory - he is apparently bored stiff, when Kev arrives and pushes inside. He shouts up at Tony about his visit to Premium Motors. To get him out public Tony and Sal get him to go into the office. Kev is not going to let them destroy his business but Tony tells him he is in a fight he is bound to lose - which Kev takes as an admission. Tony says that Kev is not going to stop his plans. They argue and Kevin slams out.

Dev makes a decision, phones the number and when Lisa answers reminds her that they met at Prem's.

Rosie begins to grasp what might have happened but before she can talk to Tony about it he says he is going to get her a company credit card (why in heavens name) - but it puts all thought of her father out of her empty head and she says not a word. Then she does remember and Tony denies that he thought it would come to this - and she believes him. Pity she will not be so innocent for ever. Anyway Tony tells her a cock and bull story about his first office deep underground where he made money but then got thrown out and became a success - as she will with her own branch of Underworld by the time she is 25 (Rosie really ought to go blond for believing this) - and it works.

Dev and Lisa meet - away from the Street but the conversation is desultory and goes nowhere - not the slightest interest, I can only think she has been primed to be this disinterested. Apparently she has know Prem for seven years - and if you are his friend then fine, become his enemy and you need to watch out.

Kev and Sal argue about the scenes at the factory and Kev cannot believe his family are turning against him and puts his coat on and goes out. Sal and Rosie look at each other - but the latter can hardly admit her part in all of this - not with a brand new company credit card to use!

At the Rovers Clarissa and Harry are having a quiet drink although Clarissa gives him earache over Liz - her pretending not to know how to place a bet. Harry despairs and asks if she wants another drink. Oddly she says she does - on him of course. At the bar Harry tells Liz to stop winding up his wife - it puts him in a tricky position. So Harry would like Liz to stay out of the way in future - for him to be rid of her. Harry wants a scotch and a gin and tonic.

Dev has returned to the shop and with drink in hand is startled by a knock at the shop door (a door which by rights should be open all hours). It is I Nina says a voice. She enters and asks if he really thought she would give up that easily. Dev tells her about Lisa - but Nina already knew - Lisa had phoned her. Dev asks about Prem - he is at a function - but when Lisa phoned Nina claimed a headache and drove to see Dev. He tells her she is sorry she has had a wasted journey. Nina wants to know if she has lost her allure with her growing years (almost certainly I would say). Dev says he is trying to start a new relationship - but Nina says that does not prevent them seeing each other. And she gets very close to him and asks him to look her in the eyes and say that - and surely he wants a lot more. They kiss.

K Richard W

It's a rainy, thundery morning in Weatherfield but Dev is full of the joys of summer. He greets Norris with a smile as he raises his umbrella, practically skipping and kicking his heels. Norris is mystified.

The booze cruisers are on their way back home, through the rain. Janice is bursting for a wee, needing to make room for the liquid she's pouring down her gullet. Audrey makes a snippy remark, Janice starts to bite and Roger plays peacemaker. Audrey makes an uncalled-for remark about the lack of nutrition in the crisps Janice is about to eat and Janice, gobbier with every ounce she slugs back retorts. You get the feeling this has been going on all weekend? All the others agree that they, too, could use a comfort break. While looking for a services stop, they start to tease Audrey again about an incident that happened that morning. Seems they told a "silly little" Frenchman that Audrey was Camilla Parker-Bowles (sorry. Duchess of Cornwall) and the tale was believe, much to Audrey's chagrin. She's very put out because she doesn't think she looks like CPB (Ah but she does!)

David is throwing a football against the side of Darryl's shed mindlessly until Darryl's comes out and stops him. Unfortunately, Darryl's has to listen to David whine on about whoever Tina is emailing constantly. David has decided to hack into Tina's email but hasn't managed to crack it yet.

Back to the Boozers, they're off the motorway looking for the Service station when ... Pop! Flappa flappa flappa... Flat Tire! Oh dear! Bill pulls the car to a slow stop and gets out to examine it and Roger gets out to help him sort it out. Only they can't. They haven't got the key to unlock the wheel nuts. They'll have to call a breakdown truck so Janice cracks open another foamy one to pass the time and Audrey looks as if she's past her last shredded nerve.

Back on the Street, Dev is dolled up in a purple shirt and pale gray jacket. Amber questions him. He's obviously an alien replacement for her usually crabby dad. She twigs. He's got a date! A woman in a dark convertible drives up and it's Lisa from the other night. She's introduced to Amber. Dev's plan is to take Lisa to the Rovers which appalls Amber. He says he knows what he's doing.

David is still at the laptop, trying to figure out what Tina's password is (her email is TinaMacIntyre@woozamail.com). He switches the view as she comes down, drying her hair with a towel. He lies and says he was looking at some video. He finds out what her dog's name, thinking that might be the password but, no, it's not. He sees her datebook which has fallen out of her handbag and flips through it. She comes back down the stairs (having gone up for an allergy tablet) and he quickly puts it back.

The breakdown truck has arrived and he's got just what is needed back at his shop and it's going to be a couple of hours. He offers to carry all four of them in his truck to the service stop. Audrey kicks off at Bill and he kicks right back at her for being a misery all weekend. She seriously thinks she could happily stay at the lay by with the car. Roger and Janice are enjoying the row.

Harry and Clarissa drive up, he's going to get the last of his stuff and is apparently going to the solicitor's to cancel the divorce. The sooner they can get on with their lives, Clarissa gloats only Harry doesn't really look happy for some reason. She doesn't think much of the neighbourhood. Harry reckons with the new flats, it's coming up in the world. As Liz emerges from the pub (in a black long sleeve top and a striking black and white skirt), Clarissa tosses out another classic Clarrisa-ism "Shame Lily Savage's mother brings it down again". (snort) Harry admonishes her. Liz is a mate.

Janice is sitting on what's left of the cases of ale (not many really, considering both Bill and Roger were buying. Hardly worth the effort!) Janice, still necking booze, gripes that Audrey won't take her turn minding the gear while they wait for the mechanic. I'm surprised Janice can even stand up considering how steadily she's been throwing it down her neck! Inside, Audrey keeps glaring out at the offending Janice. Bill and Audrey row again about the disaster that was the whole weekend and Bill's not noticed how uncomfortable she's been all weekend. At least she knows how to have a laugh, Bill cuts. He thinks they ought to take their turn but the very idea of standing guard over tins of lager is not something Audrey would be caught dead doing. Bill doesn't understand why but she quietly says that if he doesn't know her by now, he doesn't know her at all. He sighs and slopes off, she watches him regretfully.

In the pub, Dev is sitting at the bar with Lisa, chatting about their mutual friends. He keeps wittering on about the former Bollywood star though she keeps trying to ask him about himself and his life. He tries to get her to pick something for lunch but she doesn't seem keen. Emily and Norris arrive. Dev immediately sucks up and offers them a drink. Emily declines but Norris' curiosity gets the better of him and he comes over. This is the final straw for Miss Lisa who realizes Dev really isn't interested in her at all and she leaves. He doesn't seem bothered when she tells him that there's no point in calling her again.

Audrey watches Bill offer Roger and Janice some sandwiches. Bill decides to have the one beer, having had his fill as well.

Clarissa comes in the pub and Liz comes out. Dev defers to Ladies First. Clarissa smugly tells Liz that Harry is canceling the divorce. They exchange barbs, Clarissa orders their best champagne. 26 quid. Is that all? It is for Weatherfield, probably just fizzy white! Anyway, she's asked to put it on ice for later.

The breakdown truck has delivered the car. They load the car back up and Audrey gets in the front. Then she stops and asks Bill how much he's had to drink. They all insist he's fit to drive but Audrey doesn't want to take the chance and makes him let her drive. (I wonder if she's insured for it?) They bicker some more and head out, Audrey having trouble getting used to the gears and lurching out of the car park. Bill decides he might as well have another can of lager.

Tina is off out and David runs over and is about to try another password. He lets Darryl's in and tells him he's got the password, she'd written it in her notebook. Darryl's really really thinks it's a bad idea but David is in like Flynn. He sees that most of the emails are from Matt, her ex-boyfriend and his tan turns an interesting shade of green.

Out on the street, another top-down car pulls up, this one is a Jaguar XJS V12. Dev was standing outside the pub, almost as if he was waiting and the person in the car is? Yep, Nina, in a read coat with her hair tucked under a red scarf and she's got large sunglasses on. It's still an overcast day. (The reason she's dressed like that is because the actress doesn't drive and they dressed up the owner of the car in a similar outfit so that he could drive it onto and off the set though you really don't see any part of whoever is driving aside from the very top of the be-scarved head. But. Cool, eh?) Anyway, she laughs and says she's just passing. She's already heard about the date with Lisa and has come to cheer him up. She knows the perfect way. He gets in the car, very un-reluctantly.

Janice talks about Edith Piaf and the film about her (La Vie En Rose) and she, Roger and Bill start warbling "Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien", one of Piaf's biggest hits. I'm with Audrey on this one, they sound terrible! Audrey is getting more and more wound up as they drive down a road that is not the motorway (passing houses and cars and patches of green with trees). Finally, she hollers that she thinks they've missed the turn. Finally Janice starts in on her for looking down on the rest of us and it turns into a flaming row between the two women and when Janice drunkenly gobs off about Alfeh and her family and Fred dying in her house, Audrey is so distracted that she comes right off the road and they smack into a ... well it looked like gatepost or something. Anyway. They're in the bushes somewhere and we'll know in part 2 if they're all in one collective piece or not.

Tvor

Oh no! Audrey's crashed the car! We see that Bill, Janice and Roger are OK, but poor Audrey is in a bit of a bad way, she's slumped over the steering wheel and not fully conscious. Bill is concerned and looks for his phone to call the ambulance.

Silly David is snooping though Tina's emails like a boy possessed. He sees lots of emails to Tina's ex and is happy to read that one of them is about him and how Tina is quite enamored with him. He continues his snooping, against Darryl's advice.

Back at the car crash, even though Audrey is quite clearly hurt, it doesn't stop her and Janice from bickering. Bill advises Audrey not to move until the ambulance arrives and Janice rushes off to be sick."It's all that booze you've been knocking back!" shouts Roger after her and he remarks to Bill that he thinks he might have whiplash. The ambulance arrives.

Back at the Platts' David is still snooping through Tina's email. He reads out some of the lovely things Tina has written about him happily until he finds one in which Tina tells her correspondent that she wishes David were more spontaneous. "In other words," says Darryl, "You're a borin' prat. Go on, Tina!" He then adds, very wisely, to David, "Serves you right for readin' 'em, don't it?"

At the health centre, Teresa and Jerry are leaving after Jerry's appointment with the doctor. Jerry is seemingly in good health after his heart attack. They say goodbye to Gail. As they leave, Gail answers the phone to Bill.

In the Kabin, Norris is sticky beaking through the windows and then tells Rita he'll just be a minute before he rushes outside where he's seen Dev in a car with Nina, slobbering all over her. Amber sees them too. Dev tries to introduce Nina to Amber as a famous film star and tells his daughter that if she asks nicely, Nina may even give Amber her autograph. Amber dismisses her as someone nobody has ever heard of and goes inside. Dev apologises for Amber's rudeness but Nina is not fazed. They say goodbye and allude to the fact that they will meet up again. Nina gives Dev a peck on the cheek which is kind of more than that, but isn't, if you know what I mean. Norris watches it all, eagle eyed.

Norris has run back inside to tell Rita what he just saw. Norris tells Rita that there is a celebrity on the street. He tries to tell Rita how famous Nina is in Asian film but Rita is dismissive. Clarissa comes into the Kabin to buy "the biggest sloppiest card you've got". She and Harry have cancelled their divorce. Rita has the very thing to hand- a giant valentines day card reading, "Be My Bunny".Clarissa wants it until she hears the price- £4.99. She opts for something a little cheaper. A 75p card will do instead.

Inside Dev's shop, Dev is giving Amber an earful about her rudeness to Nina. Amber turns it all around and tells him he shouldn't be sleeping with a married woman who is old enough to be her grandmother. She wonders what was wrong with the one that was young enough to be his daughter. "You know what?" she says, "You should just stick to women your own age. Preferably, single!"

At the hospital, Gail arrives with Ted. Bill tells her that Audrey hasn't broken anything. Gail asks Roger and Janice how it all happened. Janice gives a watered down version of events. Bill tells her he feels terrible because he should have been driving but he'd been drinking. Gail is not pleased. "So my mother's in hospital because you couldn't resist getting drunk." Bill protests that he had only one can but he knows it shouldn't have happened.

Meanwhile, Audrey is being released by a nurse. She finds her family and is short with Bill when he asks how she's feeling. Audrey tells him she doesn't want to talk about it and she just wants to go home. She walks out with Gail. Bill calls after her but when Audrey turns around, he can't find words.

In the Rovers, Clarissa has ordered a bottle of champagne. She tells Liz when Harry comes through the door, she wants Liz to pop the cork. Liz wonders why Clarissa can't pop her own cork. Actually, that sounds a bit rude- hee!. Anyway, she replies, "I could, yeah, but what are bar staff for?" with a sneer. Norris and Rita are watching her making little snidey remarks Harry walks through the door and Liz pops the cork, spraying the champers all over Clarissa. "Happy non-divorce!" shouts Clarissa to Harry. But Harry tells her there's been a hitch and he hasn't had a chance to call his solicitor.. Clarissa stomps off. Rita, in a booth with Norris feels sorry for her.

Out in the smoking yard, Harry finds Clarissa smoking a cigarette- he thought she'd given up. She is upset and thinks it's obvious Harry doesn't want to get back together. Harry tries to explain but Clarissa thinks he's lying and starts to cry. Harry gives her a cuddle just as Liz comes through to the smoking yard with the bottle of champagne and sees them. Liz's face falls.

At Audrey's house, Gail wonders if Bill is capable of taking care of Audrey in her absence. Audrey tells her not to worry and that the accident was nobody's fault but hers. Gail and Ted leave, Gail warning Bill to take good care of Audrey.

In the Street, Kevin sees the state of the car as Roger tells Janice how she can never keep her flamin' mouth shut. Kevin tells Roger he'll give him an estimate of how much work needs to be done on the car.

At the Mortons' Teresa asks Jerry if they can have a barbie for dinner. They reminisce for a bit before Teresa hits Jerry up for some cash to go and shop for the food.

At Gail's Gail is worrying about Audrey, wishing that Audrey had come home with them. Tina comes home and gives David a kiss before asking how Audrey is. Ted heads out for the evening. Tina tells him how smart he looks and asks if he has a new boyfriend. "Old fag hag I haven't seen for ages," Ted explains. David, remembering how Tina wishes he was more spontaneous, asks Tina if she wants to go out for evening for a Chinese meal. Tina just wants to stay in though.

It looks like it's raining on the Mortons' barbecue. Jerry complains of the torture of having to cook sausages that he's not even allowed to eat. Teresa says she has bought him some veggie burgers so he really should stop complaining. Mmmmm.... veggie burgers. Not. Jerry tries to get Teresa to look at flats for rent in the paper but Teresa can't be bothered, she wants to be having fun with him and her babbies. They have a kebab cooking competition.

At the Platts' Gail goes off for a drink with Sally. She notices Tina asleep on the lounge and says to David how tired Tina must be. "Or I'm just borin'...." says David. Gail leaves and David has a think about something spontaneous he can do while Tina is asleep. He sneaks out leaving her snoozing on the lounge.

At Audrey's Bill is trying to help Audrey get comfortable. Audrey tells him to stop fussin' over her. They sit down to have a chat about what happened. Audrey thought they were going to have a lovely romantic weekend together but Bill was too busy being pie-eyed and playing cards with Roger and Janice. She tells Bill that she knows that he didn't really want her there, anyway. Truth be told, Audrey didn't even want to be there, even from the moment they set off. She gets up to ring Natasha at the salon and explain what's happened.

At the Platts', Gail returns home to find Tina still asleep on the sofa, rose petals on her carpet, candles on the stairs and romantic music on. She starts to pick the rose petals up, seemingly oblivious to David's attempt to be romantic. Eurgh. The very though of David being "romantic" with anyone make me feel queasy. David rushes downstairs to stop her from picking them up and drops a heavy hint about what he's planning. Gail goes out to have another drink (what is she thinking?) as Tina wakes up and finds David in his bath robe. They head upstairs for a bit of teenage hanky panky.

Back at Audrey's Audrey tells Bill that this weekend has made her realise how different they are. "I like to listen to radio 4 and maybe read a book. You like going on pub crawls and greyhound racing." When Bill says that she enjoys those things too, she tells him she only pretended to for his sake. "So what are you saying?" asks Bill. Audrey tells him she's not sure that their relationship is what she wants and that they both need to think. In fact, she thinks that he needs to go and stay at Kevin's for a while. Bill protests but Audrey is adamant, "Bill, I am sorry. I've made up my mind. I'd like you to go. Tonight."

Oh dear, poor old Bill.

Stella McLoughlin

Janice sees Bill coming out of Kevin and Sally's house. He tells her he spent the night on their couch. Janice seems a bit worried by this news, and goes straight over to the Platt's house and asks Gail for Audrey's phone number. She tells Gail she feels awful that Bill has copped for all the blame, and explains that Audrey seems to have kicked him out.

Kevin sits outside his own garage, hooting continuously on the horn of the car he's sitting in, because there's a van blocking his entrance. Rosie comes out and asks him to stop, telling him the van's going to be there for at least another hour. "So I can't park my car in front of my own garage?" asks Kevin, understandably irritated. Just then Tony comes out to see what's wrong. Kevin tells him he doesn't appreciate Tony send out his daughter to do his dirty work for him. Tony sends Rosie back inside and then says quietly to Kevin, "The chances are you'll be out of customers before this goes back to town!"

Gail and Ted are visiting Audrey, and Gail is horrified to hear that Ted is going to spend a few days there. She remarks that it's like musical beds. Audrey tells her she had an epiphany - she discovered, after the accident, when she realised that she was ok, that it took her a long time to wonder how Bill was. She knew they'd been arguing all weekend, but she didn't think she cared enough. "Well, I never thought you two were suited," says Gail. Ted begs to differ, he points out that Bill has a twinkle in his eye and so has Audrey. He asks if she didn't miss him, even a little, when she woke up alone this morning? She concedes that it would have been helpful to have him help her take her bra off, as her arm is in a sling - but no, not otherwise. "Bill? Bill who?"

Tina is working alongside Darryl in the kebab shop, telling him how Gail went mad when she found that David had lit 20 candles around the side of their plastic bath. Just then Teresa comes in looking for Jerry. Apparently he went out for a stroll and hasn't come back. He's due for his tablet, and his mobile phone is switched off. Darryl says he'll put the word out to look for him.

Janice takes Bill a bacon buttie as a peace offering. She says she's tried to phone Audrey but she's not answering. Bill tells her he's upset with Audrey because she invited herself along on their booze cruise and then moaned because it wasn't the QE2. He says that she's spoiled and she let herself down. She led Alf a merry dance for years and he was too grateful to deny it. She's boss of her salon, so no one argues with her there. The only member of the family who stands up to her is David. Janice starts to say that maybe it's for the best and they should go their separate ways, but Bill says it's not best for him, he wants her back - the real Audrey, not the plaster saint. Janice says he wants Audrey the mind reader. "Eh?" he asks. She points out that at the moment Audrey is supposed to decipher what Bill wants from some sort of sulky silence. "And they say women are contrary!"

David and Darryl are sitting on the wall outside David's house when Jerry comes round the corner. Darryl tells him he's been looking for him and so has Teresa, and asks where he's been. Jerry taps his nose and goes into his house.

David tells Darryl that he's got tickets for a group, the Cortinas, he read in one of her emails that Tina likes them. Darryl warns him that there's a dodgy blurring of boundaries, she may recall that she never actually had a conversation about them. David says he'll put it down to intuition.

Inside the Morton household, Teresa tells Jerry he could have been dead in a gutter, and thrusts his tablet at him. "And your mobile phone switched off!" she cries, "how would we have known?" Jerry points out that he wasn't dead in a gutter and that dead men don't make phone calls. He tells her he started wondering why she was turning down all the flats without a second glance. He hands her a piece of paper. He's found her a two-bedroomed flat with a job at Pizza Perfecta, an establishment owned by someone they know. The rent will be reduced if she works three shifts in the shop. She looks stunned and turns to say something. He stops her. "Before you start, the deposit's on me," he tells her, "it's the least I can do." Teresa does NOT look happy.

Tony approaches Sally in the pub and buys her drink. He says he's gutted that the deal with Kevin never came off and asks what she thought of the premises on the industrial estate that he suggested. This is obviously the first Sally's heard of any premises, so Tony goes on to explain how they're custom built units and have proper forecourts, he could have kept his current clients and quadrupled passing trade. "Really?" asks Sally, dumfounded. Tony continues, saying that he was paying the relocation costs and was going to give Kevin the service contract for all his vans, he'd have been quids in. "I can't believe he didn't show you?" says Tony, all innocently. Sally mutters that she's been busy, and Tony says they must admire Kevin's single-mindedness.

Just then, Kevin comes in with Rosie, and is very annoyed to see his wife sitting with Tony. "Do one!" he says, angrily, pointing out that Sally has to speak to him in work but this is her free time. Tony says he was just passing the time of day, and Rosie quickly asks Tony if he's had lunch yet and they go out, talking about sandwiches. After they've gone, Sally has a go at Kevin, saying he undermined her in front of all her neighbours. She says that Tony credits Kevin with some intelligence, he thinks Kevin has a plan. If only he knew, she says, adding that Amy Barlow has more imagination than Kevin.

Over at the Morton's. Teresa still isn't happy at the thought of having to go and live somewhere else. "You're forgetting, I know Malley and he's a shifty beggar," she says, "what's in it for him?" Jerry explains that Malley gets a tenant he can trust. Teresa says he trusts her about as far as he could throw Jerry (which wouldn't be very far, judging by the size of Jerry!) Jerry says that she won't be pumping out drums and bass or throwing sickies when it's time for work. "It's two buses to Swinton, what if something happens?" she asks him. Jerry says he's on the mend, but she still thinks it's too early for her to go, especially after his funny turn. He tries to sell her the flat, telling her it's got a power shower and a plasma tv. "I've got all that here," she says. He asks her to at least go and view it with him, she'll fall in love with it. She's not convinced.

Bill goes to see Audrey and is taken aback to find Ted there. Ted says he was about to nip out, but Audrey tells him to stay. "If Bill's got anything to new to say, he can say it, I've got no secrets," she says. Bill however, says he's not going to stand there like some performing monkey while she throws nuts. He says he's come round to apologise again, and to see how she is and if they could sort this out. "I thought we meant something to each other," he says bitterly, "but if all you want is a chance to show off, forget it!" and he walks out of the front door. "You see," says Audrey to Ted, "and I'm supposed to feel all warm and fuzzy towards that!"

Dev arrives at the club to find Prem and Nina chatting and he joins them. Prem says he heard that lunch with Lisa was a wash out. Dev seems surprised that Prem knows, but Prem tells him that if Nina knows, then he knows, she's his eyes and ears. Dev waggles his finger and remarks about the ‘girly grapevine buzzing." Prem says that maybe he's not ready for a relationship yet, and Nina smiles coyly and says that maybe he's a just a little rusty. Just then Prem's phone rings and he goes off to take the call. When they're alone, Dev asks Nina if she's trying to give him a heart attack, but she replies that she thought she was giving him a treat. "What to find you here with your husband?" he says. She asks if he's jealous, and he asks if she'd mind if he were. She replies that it would show she'd done something right at least. "Believe me honey, you did everything right," he says, as Prem comes back to join them.

Jerry is down the garden, talking to Darryl in his wooden hut. Darryl says he can't believe Jerry managed to sell the flat deal to either Malley or his mother, as they hate each other. Jerry says that Teresa has mellowed, at least that's what he's told Malley. Teresa, cleaning the window in the back door, overhears some of this. She then comes out with the laundry basket full of clean washing, and says she won't miss coming eye to eye with Jerry's smalls.

David goes into the kebab shop to see Tina. He flashes the tickets to the Cortinas, and she's delighted and gives him a hug just as Gail comes in. "How's Gran?" David asks her, and Gail replies that she's bearing up, Bill is ancient history and she now has Ted's shoulder to cry on.

Jerry and Darryl are watching tv whilst Teresa is in the kitchen preparing food. She looks thoughtfully at Jerry's bottle of tablets. Just then Jerry gets a message on his phone and tells her that Malley has said they can view the flat on Friday. He then asks if she's cooking beef madras. "Don't forget to leave us the recipe before you go," he says. As he wanders back to the tv, she takes some tablets from the bottle and puts them in the mortar and starts grinding them with the pestle.

Ted and Audrey are sitting in the garden. She remarks that she knows he wasn't impressed with the way she handled Bill earlier. "Should I apologise, say it was shock?" she asks him. "Was it the shock?" he asks. She says she doesn't think so, and tells him that she feels that time is running out. "If these are going to be my last years on earth I want them to be the best. I don't want to just drift and make do, I want a soul mate." He tells her that's a big ask, especially when she's had one mate already. She says that Alfie wasn't a soul mate, they just plodded. "What if I've left it too late?" she ponders, "what if I had him and let him go?" "But whoever he is, he's not Bill?" he asks. "No," she says. So he tells her she should say so gently, and let him move on.

Teresa is dishing up the curry and adds the powdered tablets to one portion and takes the two plates to the table. Darryl sits down in front of the meal with the crushed tablets added to it and she hurries to change the plates over. "That one's your dad's," she says. Jerry says he doesn't mind, but she points out that his portion is smaller. He tells her to come and sit down, but she says she's not hungry and then stands watching from the kitchen as he starts eating.

Anne Logan.

If it's Friday, this must be the first episode. We open in the Mortons' house, where Teresa is making a cuppa. She calls up to see if he's up and when Darryl comes in, asks him to go up to see whether his father is OK. Before he has a chance, Jerry comes down. Teresa tells him he doesn't look well and asks how he is. Of course, we know why she's so interested. She tells him he shouldn't go to the shop and even offers to do a shift for him. He just wants her to go and look at their friend's flat.

Next door, Tina's looking forward to her night out, and so is Gail. "My turn to spend five hours in the bath!" she says cheerfully. Tina still can't work out how David knew about the gig. He says he knew she liked the band. They arrange to meet about six. As David leaves he tells Tina, "I know I don't say it often enough, but I do." Tina and Gail tease him about not saying the words out loud.

Someone at ITV's stage-setting department has been watching too many old movies about authors. Ken's sitting at the dining table, dead coffee cups strewn around the computer, and some prominently placed pieces of screwed up paper! Screwed up paper? He's working on a laptop, not his trusty old Olivetti (that's not a low-fat spread, you young folks!) Blanche comes down but Ken, who appears not to have shaved or washed for a couple of days, seems not to hear her. When she does get his attention, she asks when he's going to stop all this nonsense. "What's all this mess. What do you look like?" Ken tells her he'll finish when he finishes, it's a creative mess, "and what was the other one?" Deirdre comes in behind Blanche. "All night?" she sighs. Blanche says Moses Bacup went like this. "Ended up in a padded cell for three months and came out with religion." Deirdre tries to clear the table for breakfast but Ken refuses. He needs the stuff there, though he does offer to keep it on his side. He suggests Deirdre take Blanche to Roy's for breakfast so he can get on with it.

Sally is still nagging Kevin. "Even if I wanted to sell, even if I were desperate, I wouldn't sell to that man," Kevin says. Sally tries to point out they have to pay the mortgage and the holiday will require spending money. "And if nobody's bringing their cars in . . ." Kevin tells her to stop exaggerating. He goes to work. Rosie looks worried.

Audrey's back at work, refusing any help. The stylist, Natasha, wonders if she's come to work because she doesn't want to be at home. Is she missing Bill? Audrey assures her there is nothing romantic going on with Ted.

Tina's dad, whatever his name is, arrives at Gail's to see Tina. He's brought her favourite top but Gail says she's bought a new one. He won't call in to see her at work because he doesn't want to seem like the mad stalker dad. When he hears that Tina and David are going straight to the gig after work, he asks Gail out! She agrees to meet him in the Rovers and looks very pleased. In the kebab shop, Jerry is annoyed at Teresa going on about him working. She turns serious and asks why she's there. He tries to make a joke about early release and prison overcrowding. "No-one thinks you're clever. And no-one's laughing," she says.

Ken's working, so Deirdre's vacuuming. Ken pulls the plug. "It wouldn't kill you to wait five minutes, would it?" he asks. He says he's trying to work and Deirdre apologises for not having some great intellectual work to do, but she says he's been sitting there gathering dust for days. Ken says it's about respecting each other's needs. "Oh, yes, and you've really been respecting mine," says Deirdre. "Not so you'd notice." Ken goes to the library, telling her forcefully not to touch anything. "I'll tidy up when I get back."

In the medical centre, Teresa's picking up Jerry's prescription. She tells Gail she suspects Jerry has mistakenly taken his one-a-day tablet twice. Gail is sure he'll be fine. "Even if he does make the odd slip up, it's not going to kill him, is it?" Teresa thanks her for her help.

Bill's in the yard when Audrey comes to visit. "Have you got a moment?" He's just in the middle of counting up, he says, and makes her wait. "Sink at the salon blocked?" he asks. Audrey invites him to a coffee at Roy's but he refuses because Jason is away. She tells him she just thought he should know that Ted's stopping with her to look after her. Bill thought that was his job. "Does it really matter?" she asks. It does to bill. "I'm sorry for caring," he says, before turning his back on her to go back to counting. She stands there and Bill says he can't keep up with her. "Scuse me. Work to do."

Tina's pleading for time off at dinner. Jerry agrees. He tells Darryl Tina is what's called youth. He thinks Darryl should get a life and suggests Darryl get a girl. Darryl tells his dad that David likes living dangerously.

Sally beards Tony Gordon in his den. She asks if there's any overtime available. He agrees straight away. "Go to look after our best machinist, don't we?" He offers her two hours tonight. Carla comes in and he palms off some of his work on her, saying he's got to be somewhere ten minutes ago.

At the Barlows', Blanche is ranting. "So we all have to live in squalor so he can play at being a failed author?" she asks. Deirdre tells her Ken will tidy up when he gets back. Blanche wonders what would happen if she wanted to do a jigsaw or play Scrabble. Deirdre decides to put Ken's papers in a few neat piles. "It can't do any harm, can it?" She doesn't see Blanche swiftly remove a few of the papers for a surreptitious read.

Tony Gordon saunters along a street of a neglected-looking row of terraced houses and knocks on a door. "Mr Stone," he says to the elderly chap who answers. "I've got nothing to say, says Jed Stone (for it is him!). He has a ginger cat draped over one arm. No, I'm sure Minnie's cat died years ago. "I've got nothing to say to you. Go away!" he says. "My son's on his way!" Tony doesn't believe him and walks inside without an invitation.

Darryl and Tina are cleaning the kebab shop. Darryl says something unflattering about Jerry and Tina says he's horrible to his dad. "At least I don't call him Shrek's ugly brother," says Darryl. Uh oh. "You what?" asks Tina, stopped in her tracks. Darryl starts to bluster as he realise he's almost given away David's nasty little secret. "Darryl, who has told you that that's what I call my mum?" Darryl says pathetically that he doesn't know that. Tina's only ever told one friend and Darryl doesn't know him. She starts to put two and ninety-three together . . . David goes all romantic and gets her tickets for her favourite band . . . She'd only just e-mailed . . . "Darryl! What have you been doing?"

Blanche is reading the opus. She tells Deirdre that Ken might have looked like an innocent college boy, but he had a mind like a sewer. "He's got to have done all this, else how could he write it?" Deirdre asks "what things?" Blanche reads out part of it, where the hero and his lady friend have a moment of passion on a fire escape at the back of Woolworths, unseen by the hurrying girls below. "I don't remember any fire escape," Deirdre says. Ken comes in the front door and Blanche hustles to put the pages out of sight, even though it's just getting interesting. Ken wants to apologise to Deirdre for being a pain in the neck. "Anyway, I'll get that table cleared now," he says. He steps into the room and demands to know where his manuscript has gone. Blanche points it out on the sideboard. Ken flicks through it. "But this is nothing! There's supposed to be 70 or more pages!" Deirdre says it can't be far away. Ken starts to search. Blanche tries to convince him he took it to the library.

Tony sits in Jed's armchair and says he was surprised to hear Mr Stone was still there. "This is my home! I'm not being forced out! I've been here 40 years!" Jed says. "You don't frighten me." Tony says frightening people is very easy. Instead, he's got a little gift - hundreds and hundreds of pounds. Jed calls him a shabby little trickster and Tony bristles. "What did you call me?" Jed tells him he thinks too small, too shallow. "You keep making mistakes." Such as thinking Jed's scared of him. And there's desperation in his voice, Jed says. Tony is angry. Jed says he's 40 years older than Tony, with one kidney and a few things wrong with his lungs, "but I'm twice the man that you'll ever be!" Tony storms out. Jed races to shut the door behind him and grins triumphantly.

Darryl is under attack. Tina is beating him with a cleaning cloth, and shouting at him in time with the whacks. "you can [whack!] stop [whack!] shaking [whack!] [you get the idea?] your stupid head. I've worked it out!" She accuses Darryl of hacking into her e-mails with David. Darryl, safe at last with the counter between them, gives up trying to deny it. "I'll kill him," she says. "He thought you were going to dump him," Darryl tries to explain. "I am now," she says. Darryl says David was just trying to be the idea boyfriend. Tina says they had no right. The laughing stops here. "He'll kill me," Darryl says. "What? With two broken arms and his head down the lav? I don't think so," Tina shouts. She dashes off before Darryl can stop her.

The End
For now.
Margaret Carr

For those who are interested Kylie is very small and this tour is not as good as Showgirl (either of them) but we still had a great evening, thank you for asking.

Back on the Street it looks like Gail has pulled - Joe, Tina's father. They are having a drink with David in the Rovers who is not aware that Tina is about to commit murder. Apparently Joe took a girl to see the Bay City Rollers and has had an aversion to tartan ever since. David goes to the gents and when his phone rings Joe turns it off. Darryl bursts in but cannot see David as he is in the toilets, so rushes out again.

Next door at Number One Ken is still looking for his manuscript - and he knows that Blanche is responsible but he cannot prove it - she is denying all knowledge. Perhaps she has put the papers out with the rubbish and with that he dashes off into the back yard to check the recycling. Blanche reckons the fresh air will do him good.

Ted drops in to see Bill at the yard. He recommends that Bill tries chocolates or flowers but Bill thinks it will take more than that - indeed Audrey probably wants his appendages on a plate.

Darryl is still looking for David - peers through the Platt windows but Tina throws the window open and demands to know where David is. And if he tells David why she will kill him as well. He lies and says he wants to know how she is but she just calls him Idiot and closes the window.

At the factory Fiz and Kelly are put out to see that only Sal is on overtime. Tony tells them that life is not fair - he makes a decision and then it happens. Questions are not allowed. He is obviously in fairly bad temper after the meeting with Sunny Jim. Carla asks after the meeting - but Tony reckons he can sort it. And she finds out why Sal is on overtime - it keeps her sweet and means she can chirp in Kev's ear about how fair and nice Tony is!

Ken is searching the bins and accuses Blanche of reading celebrity magazines and being a philistine. They are actually Dreary's and she takes offence at being called a philistine - which Ken then translates and Dreary points out that she knows what it means and that the next time he swallows a dictionary he should try pompous and bore as they describe him to a T.

Bill delivers flowers to Audrey in the salon together with opera tickets. She spots that Ted has put him up to it - neither of them would enjoy an evening at the opera. She tells him to give the flowers to Sal as a thank you for putting him up.

Eventually in the cafe David and Darryl meet - and then David realises his phone is switched off. Darryl admits that Tina knows all and David guesses that Darryl sold him down the river - and from a mate! David returns home and Tina is ready for him - when he tries to apologise she wants to know if it is for the act of reading her emails or getting caught. She throws her mobile at him and suggests he checks the call log. She is going to pack - she is going. David begs that Tina should not leave. Anyway how did he get her password? And then she realises from the diary. She calls him a sad pathetic loser who cannot have a proper grown up relationship - he lies, cheats and sneaks about.

Rosie and Carla discuss what is going on with the garage and the reducing workload. Carla tries to stay out of it - it is nothing to do with her. Rosie suggests that she will ask Liam to have a word with Tony to back off - but Carla says there is no need to involve Liam and she will talk to Tony when she returns from her business trip. Rosie thinks she has won the battle - Liam is obviously a weak point for Carla. A little later Carla tries to make it up with Rosie - telling her how much she is valued and that is regarded as a confidante. She asks Rosie to keep an eye on things for her whilst she is away - and there are some things which she should not discuss with Tony or anyone else in her absence. Rosie assures Carla she can be trusted. Carla hands over some money and tells her to keep it between them. Rosie tells her to have a good trip. Rosie asks Sal to join her for a drink in the Rovers - Sal agrees - the weekend starts here.

Carla warns Tony that Rosie might be trouble but Tony is not worried about that empty-headed bit of fluff like dozy Rosie. I think he might just have underestimated the little minx.

Tina asks David why he did it - he answers because he was afraid she was getting back to Matt. She points out that she was living there with him and his mother - would she do that if she wanted to be elsewhere. David said he just wanted to be the perfect boyfriend - it sounds daft now - but he reckons she would have done the same. She says he has got her wrong - what you see is what you get - like it or else. He said he wanted her to love him more. She says that is more likely - he loves the mind games - mother, sister, Jason - well no-one messes with Tina's head.

Anyway Blanche reckons that Ken's book is smutty - and she has not had such a good read since Peter moved away - he liked his smut. Anyway she never envisaged Dreary getting up to stuff like this. Dreary is concerned that she ever thought that get up to anything. Anyway there is a "pert bottomed goddess" in the book - somehow not Dreary like. And the hero's marriage is as stale as a 20 a day habit. Ken appears and is glad they have found it. Blanche points out that the book was written long before Ken met Dreary and he agrees, but Ken points out that he is 40 years older and he has 40 years more experience. Dreary suggests a drink and tells Ken it does not include him as he would not want to spend time with a fag smoking philistine.

Theresa is still giving Jerry extra drugs.

Anyway Gail and Joe get a huge surprise as Tina bangs out of the house and starts dumping bags into Joe's car and calls David a scumbag. Tina tells David this was his one and only chance - she is not taking a risk of ending up in a canal or in a heap at the bottom of the stairs. David denies that he could do that to her - but she does not know that and nor does David. Gail suggests that they go inside and talk it through but Tina is not having a word of it. She tells Joe she just wants to get out of here. David claims to love her but Tina tells him he does not know what love is if he can do stuff like this. She gets in the car and David shouts after Tina - but she ignores him. The car goes and Darryl appears. David looks at him but Darryl cannot even look back at him.

Is it all over for Tina and David?

See you next week.

K Richard W

Well it's Monday again, and the Battling Barlows are still at it. Ken has slept on the sofa. He's not shaved in days and looks very uncomfortable. Probably reeks of alcohol because Blanche and Deirdre shuffle in and Blanche cracks "It's like living with a wino". Neither of them look too impressed.

David pulls a sickie, coughing down the phone and sounding very ill until he hangs up the phone. Gail doesn't say too much though wants to make sure whatever his problem is, isn't work. He has taken the day off to try to sort things out with Tina. Gail hopes he can, she likes Tina.

Back to Casa Barlow, Ken is still sleeping and Blanche is griping in the kitchen. Deirdre makes excuses for him and defends her "character" in the book though not very convincingly. Blanche points out triumphantly "Write what you know. She's you all right" (Um, just to point out, Ken wrote this book in university, a full 20 years before he married Deirdre the first time) It makes Deirdre think. She stalks off to work with a knot in her face.

Tyrone startles Molly in the kitchen but their snog is interrupted by Auntie Pam barging through the back door with another cartload of magazines that she's nicked from the medical centre. They've got flutters of yellow sticky notes marking off pages, one in particular to do with balsa wood wedding invites. (well, they'd make good coasters, I suppose). Tyrone is hustled off to work so the women can get down to the serious business of wedding planning.

David is slumped at the bus stop on Rosamund Street where he can see right into the kebab shop as well as the car coming round the corner, driven by Joe who's dropping Tina off. She's most definitely not inclined to forgive David. He approaches and Joe gets out and says there's not much point in talking to her now. Let her cool off first. David spins around on one heel and slopes back to the bus stop.

Blanche attacks Ken with the air freshener and finally gets a grunt out of him. She scolds him for his behaviour, up all hours, drinking, "growling at the rest of us like a demented Kenny Rogers". Ken growls and snaps for her to leave him alone because he's trying to concentrate. She doesn't give up easily and demands that he takes the dog out because she's off to the post office. Eccles snaps to attention (not an easy job considering she's probably bursting for a wee) and snuffles a bit in the background, but Ken doesn't even give her a glance.

Gail is returning from the Kabin with an armful of replacement magazines and sees Joe who's parked by her house. They talk about Tina and David. Gail does say she doesn't approve of what David did but they giggle and flirt a bit and she offers to make him a cuppa, forget about the job, she's taking the long way home from the Kabin, I guess.

In the Salon, Natasha (I thought she got swept up with the curls on the floor!) and Audrey are going about their daily business. Ted arrives to see how she's doing. She's picking bones with Ted about the opera tickets. Thanks but no thanks. He offers to take her instead since he still has the tickets.

Deirdre arrives home, snatches the pen out of Ken's hand and presents him with fish and chips. Single minded, he returns straight back to his manuscript but she insists he take a half hour break. He witters on about his book and she brings up the subject that's been burning first and forefront all morning. He doesn't know if the couple in his book will stay together. She questions the fictional marriage and wonders how close to reality it is. He bubbles over with defensive anger again and hollers "I finally found something that I've got a bit of passion for". She, of course, takes that personally and goes into neck straining overdrive. All he wants, he whines, is to finish. "Believe me," she spits as she slams out the door "You're not the only one!!" Poor Ken, nobody understands the tortured artist, do they? (yes, I'm being sarcastic)

Over to the pub, Michelle is having her dinner. Ryan enters and is greeted by his mum. He's apparently been away and returned on a plane (Ireland?) Michelle gets all shirty because Steve's already managed to tell Ryan his side of the breakup before she had a chance to. She apologizes for snapping his head off and she tells him her side. Where will we go, he asks. She says they're staying there. "In his pub?" (how many of you cheered at that!). She barely misses a beat, though, and tells Ryan she thinks Steve cheated on her and doesn't know what's going to happen now.

In the kebab shop, Tina is serving Bill. David's patience obviously didn't last very long and he obviously didn't take much notice of Joe's warning to leave Tina alone. Darryl rushes him outside again and tells David to have a bit of dignity. Well, he does look pretty desperate, doesn't he? That's the last thing you should look when you're trying to get her back, mate. Darryl tells him as much. Be a man.

Audrey tells Bill that she's going to go to the opera with Ted. She is kind to Bill, though, saying she didn't want to go with him because she knew he wouldn't enjoy it. They make small talk and agree to have a drink sometime. Bill watches her go, thoughtfully.

In the pub, Pam is showing off pictures of horse drawn carriages. Molly assures Ty that she wants a wedding that they can afford, something cheap. Pam shakes her head No behind Molly's back when she catches Tyrone's eye. Tyrone looks worried again.

Becky, Jason and Eileen are chatting at the bar and Eileen asks Becky how long she's staying. Becky thinks maybe she should start looking for somewhere else to stay though Jason seems to think if it's fair for Sean to have Marcus there, he should be able to have Becky. Sean's only the lodger after all. Over behind the bar, Michelle is about as much use as a chocolate teapot, stood there filing her nails. Steve comes over and hints that they could use some clean glasses. Michelle just tells him to fill his boots and he starts to do just that before realizing he's got staff to do that and asks Becky to do it. (oh grow one, Steve!) Michelle then hollers down off her high horse, calling Steve down for taking it out on Becky because he's too chicken to ask her to do it (Um, he did, actually). Becky just smooths it over gives Steve a dirty look.

Deirdre has come home early, taking the rest of the afternoon off as a sickie. Ken's nowhere to be seen. Blanche relates to her daughter that she tried to sort him out. Deirdre whines and frets so Blanche offers the suggestion that Deirdre should read more of the book before she makes up her mind for sure. She goes to lie down and leaves Deirdre to it.

Becky is having a smoke outside when Jason comes back to find out what that little encounter with Steve was about. She fobs him off saying it's just Steve throwing his weight around as a boss, taking out his bad mood on her but not to worry, she can handle herself. Has Jason suspected anything?

Eileen arrives at the cab office and Steve goes off on another whine about his situation. "It's my flaming pub!" (Yeah, but you're not doing anything about it!) Eileen hopes that whoever he boffed that night was worth it. He insisted he didn't "boff" anyone but she points out that no innocent bloke would move out of his own pub. Just as Eileen asks for the identity of the person he didn't boff, the door opens and in walks Jason wanting a word about Becky. Oh dear.

Ken comes back to find Deirdre with smoke coming out of her ears, having been reading the book. She's taking it all personally now. She's angry and upset and figures he has the lowest of the low opinions of her judging from what she's read. He's gobsmacked that she'd believe it. It's all fiction! She throws the manuscript at him and she hollers at him, rants and raves, hurling insults. "If round here is so awful, why did you never have the guts to leave!!" Her words really strike a never, I think. Ken screams back, "I've tried, I've dreamed of it, but life happens!" The row escalates, and every time he opens his mouth he only digs himself a deeper hole. "The man in here thinks he's married beneath him" she hurls and he strikes out "At least I've been able to use something from my own experience"... SMACK!!! She really lays one on him and cries, "It's always been someone else holding you back. Not you, never you" and she runs out sobbing, leaving him raw. Blanche comes back in wondering what's going on and he screams GET OUT!!!!!!!! She scampers back out and he throws his manuscript down and reaches for the whiskey bottle with shaking hands, pours a shot, downs it and tosses the glass on the table. Yes. Definitely exposed a big, bad, nerve there, I think.

Tvor

Jason and Steve are outside in the street. Steve is nervous about what Jason has to say to him, thinking Becky has told Jason about their night together. Luckily for Steve, Jason is only looking out for his girlfriend. He tells Steve how much Becky loves working in the Rovers and how he hopes that Steve will keep her on the staff, even though Steve finds her annoying. Steve is relieved.

Joe leaves Gail's house after lunch. They both seem very pleased to have spent some time together. Joe tells Gail he wants to see Gail again but Gail wonders if they will since David and Tina have broken up. He tells Gail that Tina and David obviously want to be together but need nudging in the right direction. "Leave it with me," he says before getting in his car.

Ken is at his dining table, looking at old books, still unshaven and quite possibly drunk in the middle of the day. He looks through his manuscript, gives a big sigh, gets up from the table, pockets a half bottle of whisky and takes the dog for a walk.

Becky and Steve are talking out in the smoker's yard at the Rovers. Steve is worried about the truth getting out about him and Becky. Becky is affronted that Steve only seems to be worried about him and Michelle. "You mightn't give a stuff about my relationship, Steve, but I do and I ain't gonna chuck it away by opening my gob!" When Steve suggests she might not say anything on purpose to get them in trouble but perhaps she would unwittingly, she tells Steve to back off, threateningly. Sean comes out for a breath of fresh air and harangues Becky for smoking. Sean suggests they might need a night out to let off some steam. Becky is up for it. She wonders if Michelle would be interested in joining the two of them.

Eileen comes across Deirdre who is crying on a bench out in the street, a la the bench of tears in Eastenders. I don't know about you but I always do all my crying out in public, in full view of the neighbours so that's realistic. Deirdre complains about how she feels thicker than a whale omelette and takes Eileen up on her offer of a cup of tea at her place, warning Eileen not to expect any intelligent conversation. "Oh no, don't worry," Eileen reassures her, "I've got Jason for that...." and they go for a cuppa and a chat.

Tyrone is colouring in a poster at the garage offering free collection, wash and return with every service when Auntie Pam comes across him and tells him she needs all his money. Tyrone is reluctant to give her any money for her opportunity to buy a load of catering stock which is going to auction this afternoon but Pam assures him that he'll get his money back and more. Tyrone gives in eventually.

In the Rovers, Becky is applying her mascara and asks Steve what Michelle enjoys doing on a night out. Steve asks her not to keep torturing him but Becky is having none of it. She invites Michelle to join her and Sean on their night out. Michelle ignores Steve when he protests that Michelle will be working that night and agrees to go.

At Eileen's, Deirdre and Eileen are polishing off a bottle of wine. Deirdre thinks this is the worst fight she and Ken have had despite the fact that they have both strayed. She is sad to have discovered that when Ken came back before, it was out of habit. She thinks the Ken she fought with earlier was a man she didn't know, a bitter man filled with contempt for her. She wonders if Ken has so little respect for her, how can she take him back? And if they really have so little in common, what would be the point?

Ken comes back from taking the dog out to another nagging from Blanche who takes one look at her unkempt son-in-law and suggests all he needs now is a pair of fingerless gloves and maybe he wants to trade in the dog leash for a bit of string. "Nobody likes getting old," says Blanche, "and everyone has their own way of dealing with it. But trying to recapture something that's gone? It's pointless, downright selfish." Ken is outraged at the accusation of selfishness. He tells Blanche how he has put off doing so much with his life and denied himself so much to avoid rocking the boat. He's just made do with what he has. "Made do?" asks Blanche, "How do you think that makes Deirdre feel?" Ken argues that it's not Deirdre's fault how he feels, it's the house, the street, the whole life he fell into. He tells Blanche she had no idea how much he hasn't done. Blanche tells him to snap out of this self-indulgent whining and start measuring himself by what he has done instead of what he hasn't. Ken picks up his manuscript and tells her that through his writing he feels like it's not too late. "If you're going to pour out your frustrations on paper, don't leave it lying around," Blanche tells him. She tells him she read as much of it as she could stand and when Ken accuses her and Deirdre of having a good laugh at him together she tells him, "Far from it! You try seeing yourself being mocked by somebody that you've given half your life to! You're damn lucky she hasn't packed her bags!" Ken looks like he's been given some food for thought.

David is hanging around outside in the street. Joe sees him and they chat. David tells Joe that he just wants a chance to tell Tina how sorry he is and how much he misses her. Joe tells David that Tina is sure to miss him too so he should just hang in there. Joe leaves to go and see Tina in the shop. He tells Tina that she should give David a break. Tina is not easily swayed and tells her dad that she'll never be able to trust David again. She asks Joe if he wants something to eat but he's not hungry. She gets a bit snarky with him, knowing that he only came in to butt into her business with David (my words, not Tina's). She apologises to her Dad, citing stress from David gawping at her all afternoon. Joe organises a bowling date with Tina for the evening.

Blanche and Ken are talking at the table. It seems Ken has explained to Blanche that he has not based the characters in his book on anyone he knows, except perhaps his parents. Blanche is not convinced though, she thinks the mother is the spit of Deirdre. "And," she says, "I've had my suspicions about the grandmother. You've used that "knitting under the guillotine" line on me before!" I love that line! Ken tries again to explain that the characters were not based on anyone and that the manuscript was not meant to be read yet; it had some work to be done on it. Blanche tells him to give up, there are some things that simply can't be made better and he should face it, he's no Barbara Taylor Bradford. "On balance," says Ken, "that's possibly the nicest thing you've ever said to me!" Blanche leaves and Ken starts to read his manuscript again. He looks a bit hopeless.

Tyrone and Ashley are having a pint together. Tyrone tells Ashley how business at the garage has slowed down and he can't get any overtime any more. Ashley complains that cold meat sales at the butcher shop have dropped right off. Tyrone looks slightly uncomfortable. Auntie Pam comes in. Tyrone rushes her to the bar where she tells him she won the auction that Tyrone bankrolled for her. Tyrone is pleased but asks Auntie Pam to go easy on the ham sales since Ashley's feeling the pinch in the cold meat market.

Joe rings Gail's doorbell (not a euphemism. Yet.) and lets Gail in on the cunning plan to go bowling and set Tina up with that idiot David again. Gail simpers a bit and flutters her eyelashes furiously while asking Joe if it's wise for them to meddle in the kids' relationship. Joe says he'll take the blame if it all blows up in their faces.

David comes into the kebab shop where Darrell tells him that Tina left early. David is not best pleased that he's been sitting outside for so long waiting like a "right dork" out there. "Thanks a bunch, mate!" says David before leaving the shop.

Michelle goes into the living room where Amy is colouring in or something. She tells Amy she's going to get her tea ready. Steve tells Michelle that he's not best pleased about Michelle making a fool of him earlier when he tried to tell her about the roster. He tells her he's getting fed up of apologising and he won't be doing it much longer. Oh dear, that gets Michelle's dander up. "Oh, so the clock's tickin' is it? Forgive you by a certain date or ship out?" Amy starts crying at their fighting which makes them both feel guilty. Steve asks how long Michelle is going to keep this up, upsetting Ryan and Amy. Michelle tells him it's his fault and nobody else's. She placates Amy by promising pizza for her tea.

Out in Ken & Deirdre's back yard, Ken is burning his "opus". Deirdre comes and finds him. He tells Deirdre not to pity him, "The end of an impossible dream should be celebrated, not mourned." They talk about Ken's hopes and dreams, the idea that if things had been different, if he had more time etc. Ken has come to finally embrace his mediocrity and he will be happy with who he is. Deirdre wonders about her, the woman he had to settle for. She tells him that she can't easily forget the things he said to her and she'll be staying with Liz tonight. Ken tells her that there's no need for her to leave, the whole argument they had was him lashing out instead of facing up to truths, it was all about him. Deirdre delivers a blow, "Yes Ken, it was. Maybe it always has been." Ken is left to stew in his own juice, as my dear old mum would say.

Stella McLoughlin

Ken hears the front door open and close and shouts, "Deirdre!" and rushes down the stairs. However, it's only Blanche.

David goes into the doctors' surgery and finds his mum at work. He says he needs to borrow her keys, he's forgotten his. She asks him if he'll come ten pin bowling this evening and he's not at all keen until she confesses that Tina will be there, she and Joe have arranged it. He perks up and says he'll go and have a bath. As he's leaving, Teresa comes in and asks for Jerry's repeat prescription. Gail checks the computer records and says that he's not due another batch yet, and remarks that he can't possibly have got through all of the last lot already. Teresa, thinking fast, tells her that Jerry's not very organised and she thinks he accidentally threw some away. Taking her at her word, Gail hits a few keys on the computer and then tells her they'll be ready tomorrow. This, of course, is not part of Teresa's plan and she tells Gail that Jerry must have them today. Gail explains that the doctor has to sign it and he won't be in until tomorrow. "You've got blood on your hands, lady," hisses Teresa as she goes to leave. Gail hesitates and then calls her back. She'll check with the duty doctor, and tells her to come back in an hour. "Gail, I could eat you!" says Teresa, and goes out smiling.

Ken and Blanche are in the living room when Deidre comes home. She's been to see Tracy. (I thought she was staying with Liz?) He starts to speak, when she stops him. "I've heard your apologies," she says, "save your breath. You've apologised for hurting me but that doesn't quite cover the fact that you said it and meant it." She tells him to note that she's his intellectual inferior and she's still managed to string a sentence together! She tries to push past him and he puts his hands on her arms to stop her. "Get your hands off me!" she snaps, "you grabbed me like that once before and time doesn't erase that memory!" He quietly tells her that he doesn't think he's above her, he loves her. "What a pity I haven't got Mike to run to now!" she says, and rushes out. Ken sighs and sits down. He remarks that Blanche is uncharacteristically quiet. She tells him she's trying a new tactic – keeping her nose out. He says it always worked for him. "Did it?" she says, "I found it a tad dull!"

Gail and David are at the bowling alley when Joe and Tina arrive. Joe and Gail exclaim what a coincidence it is that they've run into each other, but Tina is not fooled for a moment. "Your acting is shameful," she says, turning to her dad. "I can't believe you've done this to me!" David, looking very uncomfortable, tries to strike up a conversation with Tina. "All right?" he says. "I was until I saw you," she mutters. Joe asks if they'd like a drink. Tina says a bottle of meths will be the only thing that will get her through this. Joe asks Gail to give him a hand and they leave the teenagers while they go to the bar. Although David tries to make conversation Tina is very obviously annoyed.

Teresa is serving up yet another curry to Jerry, while poor Finlay only gets a rather unappetising sandwich. Jerry wonders if all this curry is good for him, and Finlay says he wishes he had curry. Jerry tries to give him his, but of course Teresa can't let that happen. "Don't go giving him curry, the age of him, he'll be up all night with an upset stomach!" she snaps, (but surely, Indian children eat curry, don't they?) "give him his sarnie back now!" She tells him that she's gone to a lot of trouble making this food, (yes, and we know just how much!) so would they please both tuck in. Jerry then brings up the subject of Malley's flat and asks if she's thought any more about it. She tells him she'd love to move in but it's damp. She could put up with that, she tells him, but it wouldn't do for when the children came to stay. "Kiddies and mould don't make easy bedfellows." Finlay studies his sandwich. "This bread's mouldy," he complains. "It's penicillin, it's good for you," she snaps.

Back at the bowling alley, David tries again to apologise to Tina. She tells him he was snooping on her and she feels defiled. He tells her he just wanted to know what she thought and wanted to impress her with things she liked. She tells him she knows why he did it and she's forgiven him, but she just can't have someone with that kind of hang up in her life. She finishes her drink and tells him she's leaving. "Why, I thought you liked bowling?" he asks. She says she does, but doesn't like being manipulated.

Sean, Marcus and Becky are at the bar in the Rovers, chatting to Steve while they wait for Michelle. Just then she comes down, dressed in a short, clingy red dress, ready for the night on the town. Steve starts to ask what time she's likely to be back and then sees that's not the right thing to say. As she passes him he remarks that the dress doesn't cover much. Becky laughs and tells him that when girls go for a night out it's a competition to see who can wear the least. As Becky and Michelle go off, Steve comments that she might as well wear a sign on her head that says, "Grope Me". "Happen that's what she wants," jokes Sean and they go off laughing.

After the break we catch up with the four of them in a karaoke bar, knocking back shots. Becky thinks a guy across the room is eyeing her up, but Michelle tells her he's just using Becky to get to her. Marcus turns round to see who they're looking at. "Oh, cute!" he says. Sean is shocked. "Marcus!" Eventually the guy in question walks past them and Becky asks him if it's her he's eyeing up, or Michelle. "Neither," he says nodding towards the stage, "I'm watching my bird sing!" Conversation then turns to Michelle's singing voice, she used to sing in a couple of groups.

David also decides to leave the bowling alley, telling Gail he's just not in the mood now. Gail tries suggesting that the three of them go for a Chinese meal but he won't be persuaded and leaves. Although Gail says she feels like a naughty schoolgirl, she and Joe decide to put some embarrassing shoes on and have a game.

Steve is wandering disconsolately round the pub. He tells Eileen that when Michelle gets back he's going to suggest a big chat and clear the air. "That's if you can," says Eileen, "it might be too late." She says that Manchester is full of eligible bachelors and Michelle might be lip-locked with one right now. "She is fit," agrees Jason. This obviously worries Steve and he decides to give her a call to see what time Ryan needs to go to bed. (This boy is 16! Surely his mother doesn't give him a bedtime?) "Ryan that you've lived best of a year with?" queries Eileen, and mutters words like ‘lame' and ‘pathetic'. Surprisingly, Michelle's phone seems to be turned off.

Back in the karaoke bar, Michelle is giving us all a treat with her fab singing. Sean comments that she's wasted in the Rovers. Becky is studying her phone, she's got messages from Jason. Marcus remarks that Jason's fit, and Sean protests that he's fit too. As Michelle gets down from the stage she bumps into an old friend, and gives him a hug. "She doesn't waste any time," comments Becky, as they watch from their table.

Deirdre comes downstairs in her robe, having had a bath. She sits down and Ken asks how Tracy was. "Visit her yourself sometime and find out," she replies, commenting that she's probably his intellectual inferior too. Ken admits that he did get a bit carried away with himself but he's trying to make amends and he's written to Tracy. He knows he's neglected his family, and Deirdre concedes that it must have been painful, burning his book. "Not really," says Ken, "it was a load of derivative tosh." He tells her he doesn't look down on her, if anything he looks up to her. She admits that her comment about Mike was below the belt. "I want us to grow old together," he says. "We are old," she says. "I want us to grow really old together!" he says, and they laugh. Then he tells her that he loves her, he loves her strength and the way she knows her own mind and emotions and the way she always puts the family first. Then he gets down on his knees and asks if she'd like a huge glass of red wine in the back yard. She laughs and says yes, and then has to help him to his feet. "What are you like!" she says.

Over at the Mortons', Jerry tells Teresa he's spoken to Malley and he's going to damp-proof the flat so it'll be ready to move into soon. He starts to take Finlay up to bed, stopping Teresa as she tries to help. "You stay there, Princess," he says. She reminds him how he called her that on the night they met. He grunts and goes off upstairs with Finlay.

Back at the bar, Michelle has taken her old friend, JD, back to her table they're chatting. She tells him her fella slept with someone else so he's in the dog house. "Naughty boy - what's he like?" says JD. Michelle says the girl concerned will be no better and if she got her hands on her…..Becky, looking uncomfortable, says the girl might be really nice, everyone's done it. "She hasn't," says JD, indicating Michelle, "Mother Theresa, this one." JD then tells Michelle that the group he's in has a gig tomorrow but their singer has laryngitis and he asks if she'd fill in. "What, a one-off?" she asks. He says that they've also got a tour coming up as well. "You are still singing professionally?" he asks. "Yes," says Michelle firmly, "I am, I am singing professionally, I think I'd be up for that!"

In the bowling alley, Gail and Joe are getting on like a house on fire, and they decide that they should see more of each other. "I don't know, what about the kids?" asks Gail. "What about them?" asks Joe. Gail says it might seem like they're seeing each other and that might be odd for them. "Who says we're going to tell them?" says Joe.

Ken and Deirdre are sitting outside in the dark in their yard, having a chat and a glass of wine. They hear singing coming from next door as they cuddle up to each other, it's Michelle arriving home to the back yard of the pub. . Steve is sitting outside there, enjoying a cigarette, but is less than pleased when he realises she's not alone, she's brought JD with her. She tells him she's known him for years and has invited him back for a nightcap. Steve wants to stay but she tells him it would be best if he goes back to Lloyds. As they go inside Steve notices, to his dismay, JD put his hand lightly on Michelle's backside!

Anne Logan

Becky, coughing up her lungs, lets herself into the back of the Rovers, only to find a strange man asleep on the sofa in the living room/staffroom.

Steve's at Streetcars, moaning about that very man and how little sleep he got thinking about Michelle with that man. Eileen is not only unsympathetic, she's winding him up! John Stape comes in and while Steve's telling him about it, Steve gets all teary eyed over Michelle and her old friend in "our house . . . our bed."

Tina's dad's driven her to work but she's reluctant to get out because she thinks David will be waiting behind the bins to jump out or something. Her dad tells her to just put her coat over her head and make a run for it. She doesn't seem to have a coat, but she makes a run for it, and before she's got the six feet from the car to the door of the kebab shop, David is there shouting that he just wants her to talk to him.

John Stape tells Steve the cool thing would be not to go round to the Rovers. They start sneering at "JD"'s name. Eileen tells Steve he's just driving himself insane with jealousy, though Steve reckons he's cool about it. Next thing he's decided to go round to the pub.

At Eileen's, Sean is on the phone trying to make an appointment with someone. He says it has to be today. Marcus overhears the end of the conversation, when Sean mentions a clinic. He worries that Sean's "fallen off the monogamy wagon", but Sean explains he's going to a skin clinic. He's going to have botox, despite Marcus's protestations. "I'm sorry, Sean, but I think it's vain and superficial." Sean tells him that the clinic could also zap all the broken veins that Marcus has on the side of his nose. Marcus is suddenly interested. "Can they? How much?"

Steve goes into the pub and hears laughing from the back room. Michelle and JD are having breakfast and laughing old times. Steve tells JD he wants him on his way. Steve starts to read the riot act and tells them there's a four-year-old child living there. JD says he kipped on the sofa. "You think I'm thick?" asks Steve. Michelle says she didn't think even Steve was this thick. JD says he's got a girlfriend. Michelle says she's single. JD tells Steve: "We're not all like you, you know."

Jerry and Tina are ready to open, though David's waiting outside. Jerry tells Tina to get behind the counter and he goes to open up. David's through the door like lightning. He tells Jerry he hasn't come to cause trouble but wants ten kebabs. Jerry tells him to wait by the door. "And you do not attempt to talk to my assistant."

"How dare you show me up like that!" Michelle is furious. Steve thinks she started it by bringing her new boyfriend back to his house. "He's not me boyfriend!" Steve wants to know why JD said he'd call Michelle later, then. "Because he's got a gig and he needs a singer!" Steve doesn't believe her. "Tough!" says Michelle. "Listen! I will invite the entire cast of the Chippendales back here if I want to. It's got nothing to do with you!" she shouts. "I wouldn't put it past you!" Steve shouts back. He asks why he should believe what she says when she won't believe what he said. Michelle says because she doesn't lie. She says she would never sleep with another man in that house under his nose. She admits there was an element of letting Steve think the worst about JD. They agree that neither of them can believe what the other one says. "Doesn't this sort of balance things out a bit?" Steve asks hopefully. "No, it just proves we've got no future," Michelle answers before walking away.

In the kebab shop, David is ignoring his orders. He approaches the counter and says he just wants Tina to talk to him. "No communicating with any of my staff," says Jerry. "Step away from the counter." David says he's not going anywhere and what's more, nobody's coming, either. He locks the door. Tina goes to protest to him, but Jerry sends her back behind the counter and corners David, telling him he owes another six quid. David pays up and Jerry shoves the kebabs at him and hustles him outside. When he's gone, Jerry angrily tells Tina to take the rest of the day off to sort out her private life. "And don't bother coming back here till you do."

"So there he was, in my living room, in his pants, eating my bread and drinking my coffee!" Steve tells John. "Well, either he's a very brave man or they've got nothing to hide," says John. "Oooor," begins Eileen, continuing her campaign of Making Things Worse, "they were acting casual because you'd walked in!" She tells them that Michelle dumped him and if she wasn't still living in Steve's house, he wouldn't have a leg to stand on. Steve agrees they're right. "Can't carry on like this."

In a fancy hair salon, Peter answers the phone, but it's for Paul. While Peter's on the phone talking to someone called Margaret (:-) about her roots, David comes in. Peter makes annoyed pointing gestures at his watch, but David says they're lucky he's there at all. "I've had me root canal done." He goes to work and Paul tells Peter he's too gullible and it was clear David was lying. "I've got my eye on him. No room for slappers in this salon."

Molly gets into her kitchen and discovers the table covered with blue buckets and the dishes haven't been done. Aunty Pam's raced off somewhere, so Molly takes off her engagement ring and, sighing, gets to work.

"Great meeting up last night. Sorry about my mutton-head ex. I am mortified. He will die." "Two Ts in mutton," Steve says, correcting Michelle's text message spelling. "You're allowed to abbreviate in texts," she tells him. Sean and Marcus come in. It seems Sean went all that way and couldn't go through with getting the botox injections. He says he's not scared of needles. He's a spiritual person who is not comfortable with the cult of perfection. Marcus had his nose veins done, though. Marcus was impressed by the money the clinic was taking in. "I'm tell you, it's money for old rope."

Ashley's cleaning up when a customer comes in wanting a pork pie. "Oh, and I'll have a jar of your best pickle as well," says Aunty Pam, for it is she. Ashley says he doesn't sell it. She gives him a spiel about how a pie isn't a pie without a dollop of pickle, the same as a Scotch egg is bland until you add some pickle. "Then it does a little jig on your tongue." Ashley suggests she tries Dev's for the pickle. "I will," she says. "And I think I'll get me pie there, and all." She turns away as if to leave then turns back to him. "Luckily for you, I'm not a real customer. That were just a dramatic reconstruction." Ashley's a bit stunned. "Like on Crimewatch?" Pam tells him that what just happened then could be happening all the time and losing him hundreds of pounds. "All right," says Ashley. "Cut to the chase. What are you selling? I presume it's pickle. Come on. Let's see it." Pam brings out a homemade-looking jar of pickle, opens it, scoops out a teaspoon with the teaspoon she just happens to have with her (she took it in front of Molly's eyes) and lets him taste." "How much?" "Pound a jar." "I'll have 20." They shake on the deal.

Teresa's sitting in the bus stop eating biscuits straight from a packet but refuses to give Gerry one. She says she'd never be able to face Mel because she's supposed to be looking after him. Gerry tells her she's sacked because he's been feeling lousy all day. "From now on I'm self-medicating," he says, snatching the biscuit packet. Turns out Teresa is waiting for Kayleigh to get off the bus after being away on her school trip and the biscuits are her favourite. The rate the two of them are going, there won't be any left to give the kid! The bus arrives and Kayleigh gets off.

In the salon, Tina arrives. She has an appointment but says she wants David to wash it. Peter says they don't usually get requests for juniors, but takes her through to where David is carrying dirty cups. He asks what she's doing there and she says she's come to get her hair cut. "You know it'll cost you a bomb, don't you," David warns. She does.

Molly's finishes the dishes, fetches herself a bag of crisps, looks at the blue buckets on the table and leaves.

In the pub, Steve puts on a big show of being matey with Becky. He thanks her for coming in early. She tells him she got a bit of a shock when she saw JD crashed out on their settee. "Really?" he asks. He thinks for a minute, then asks Michelle if he can have a word through the back.

David starts the washing process. "That water all right?" he asks. "Fine," Tina says. He asks her what she's having done. "I can't afford these prices," Tina tells him. "I only came in to have a row." David is puzzled. "I am fed up with you coming in where I work and making a scene," she tells him. "Now it's my turn." As he tries to say that's not a good idea, she screams. "OW!! That's water's hot! You did that deliberately, didn't you!" She leaps up and turns the water nozzle on him, telling him he started it and was out of order this morning. "Well it's payback time." She starts to spray him some more, David shouting at her to stop."

In the back of the pub, Steve tells Michelle he's prepared to give her the benefit of the doubt. Michelle tells him there's nothing to forgive because she hasn't done anything wrong. "Well, I hadn't done anything wrong, but I still ended up kipping on Lloyd's sofa for the last month!" Michelle tells him he can't compare the two situations. Steve says he can't live like this and last night made him realise just how crazy it all is. "Do you want me to move out?" she asks. "I want us to move on," Steve says. "I want us to get back together. I want you to forgive me the way I'm forgiving you." Michelle glares at him. "Well, if you can't, then yeah, I think you should move out," he says.

The End of the first episode.
The second will be along very soon indeed!

Margaret Carr

Now, our Steve is putting on a hard-man act. He has given Michelle an ultimatum. He tells her that either they get back together by tonight and make a fresh start or they go their own way. Michelle is a bit surprised and shocked by this. Ryan overhears what is going on and he is upset.

Now until recently (ie the previous episode!), David has been working at a high class salon, sorry boutique ! The owners, Peter and Paul (I do hope we see them again. They are "fun" ! Maybe Sean will meet up with them ?), chuck David and Tina off the premises. David says he is innocent and was not to blame. However when Peter threatens to call in a Community Policeman, David gives up his protest. Tina turns to Paul and asks angrily about written warnings. He responds that they do write them, then send them on !

Michelle offers Ryan a stir fry for tea. He says he may as well enjoy it while he can, and wonders where they will live when Steve chucks them out. She tells him that it won't come to that, and that he should get ready for his trip to Irleand. She assures him that she will sort it out before he goes.

Back at Peter and Paul's, David yelled to them that they owed him a week's wages. Paul suggested that he sued them ! Tina's hair was soaking wet so with the absence of a towel, David kindly lent her his t-shirt. This started them both giggling. David offered to comb her hair, and Tina snapped back that he wasn't to touch her. She said that because he made her laugh, it doesn't mean that she will fall to his feet.

Jerry was about to order a hotpot for himself in the Rovers, until Teresa came in and put a stop to it. Ashley was about to suggest some low fat meat, when Teresa jumped in with White Fish and Chicken. Ashley went on and said there were new meats on the market. Teresa said she knew about Tofu, but Ashley said it was meatless. Teresa said Jerry was going to have it for Sunday dinner because she was sick of the sight of salad.

At the home for lost souls (Eileen's), Marcus found a leaflet about Botox treatment. He got out his mobile phone.

At Gail's David comes rushing in and slams the door. She asks him what has put in him a bad mood, and he explains what had happened at Peter and Paul's boutique. Gail asks him to confirm that he hasn't lost his job. To be awkward David responds that he hasn't lost his job. Then a moment later he confirmed he had. Gail tried to reassure him that it wasn't the end of the world. David then noticing his mother is dressed up, asked her if she was going out for a date, but she just went upstairs.

Over in the Rovers, Becky senses something is wrong with Michelle. She asks what the problem is, and Michelle replies it is the "usual" between her and Steve. She believes that he genuinely wants to get back to the way things were and that he wished he had told her the truth from the beginning. (I presume the "real truth" is a timebomb waiting to come out at a future date). Becky tried to assure Michelle that Steve was a really good bloke. Becky then decided to leave Michelle alone. As she went out she said to Michelle that he made a silly, small mistake, and it would be a shame to throw everything away because of that.

At the cab office, Steve confides in Eileen about the ultimatum he gave to Michelle. He really wants to go over to see her, but Eileen tells him that it would only make matters worse. She does wonder if Michelle really knows how he feels for her. He explains that he has told her many times. He goes on to tell her that she is the best thing that has happened to him and that he doesn't want to lose her.

Teresa is about to make Jerry a meal with her own secret ingredient (pill), when Ashley comes in and says he will make a casserole of low fat and low cholesterol ostrich meat.. Teresa says that she is quite capable of making a casserole herself. But Jerry thanks Ashley and turns to Teresa to say that he is a star. Teresa manages a weak smile.

Michelle turns up at the cab office to book a cab. Eileen makes her excuses and leaves the office. Steve, thinking the worse, says that he coudn't bear to lose her. She said she knew, and then said if they got back together would he promise not to keep any more secrets from her? When he confirmed he would, she went on to say that they would have to agree not to cheat on each other and always be perfectly honest. Steve thought of themselves as a team. She then finally said that they would never hold each other back. He agreed. So she said when she comes back it will be the start of their new life together. He said it would and planted a big kiss on her lips as she cried out that she had missed him.

Joe arrives outside Gail's house. She comes out of the front door and waves to him. However, at exactly the same time Tina comes out of the corner shop and calls out to her father. He acknowledges her as Gail goes back inside the house. Tina presumes that her dad has come to pick her up She tells him about what happened with her and David.

Molly comes home and finds Aunty Pam filling up jars of pickle. Molly wonders who 'Old Ned' was in 'Old Ned's Buxton Pickle'. Pam responds that it is the same as 'Daddy' in 'Daddy's sauce' or 'Mother' in 'Mother's Pride' bread. Pam then tells Molly she is going off to the market where there are loads of jars in a skip which she could reuse for her pickle. In the meantime Molly was to continue to fill up the existing jars and produce more labels. Molly goes to take off her engagement ring only to find it was not on her finger.

Back over at Jerry's, Ashley explains that a guy from an ostrich farm was demonstrating at the meat market and giving away free samples. Ashley asked him tell him what he thought of it, and then he might start selling it. As Jerry showed Ashley to the door, Teresa realised that she hadn't been able to give Jerry another does of tablets.

Joe, having dropped Tina home then goes out again to meet Gail. She asks Joe if Tina had seen her, but he said that she was too busy talking about David and her hair. Gail said they should keep their friendship a secret for the time-being. She said secrecy makes it more exciting !

Steve is back at The Rovers and manages to tell everyone (who cared) that he and Michelle were back on again. He is about to pour himself a pint of beer when Becky insisted it should be more of a celebration and gives him a bottle of champagne from the firdge. He says he will take it upstairs and have it ready for Michelle's return.

When Aunty Pam returned home she finds Molly in tears. She said she has lost her engagement ring. Pam asked her when she last had it and all Molly could remember was taking it off to do the washing up earlier. She thought she had put it on the sink.. Molly wanted to take the U bend pipe off the sink, but Molly said check everywhere else first. Then Pam realised that she had been doing most of the bottling for her pickle by the sink, and wondered if Molly's ring could be in one of the jars.

Marcus tells Sean that he rang the number of the Botox clinic. Sean jumps to the wrong conclusion and says he is not going to have it done. But Marcus adds he rang to find out what he needs to become a Botox Practitioner. Sean answered that it would be nerves of steel and a streak of sadism. Marcus said one out of two isn't bad.

Michelle gets back to the pub and tells Steve that she knew he would be waiting up for her. He says he and the bottle of champagne. She tells him that she is on a high after the concert. Steve suggests taking the champagne to the bedroom, but first Michelle wanted to go on about the gig. She tells him that everybody wanted them to carry on. She then dropped the bombshell that they are going to Belgium on tour ... and they had agreed to support each other .... He asks where this was leading. She says she would like to join them on tour. Of course she added that she didn't definitely say she would go with them, to which Steve added that she had obviously said a probable yes. She went on that if he didn't want her to go, she would accept that. However, Steve, resignedly said it was okay. Obviously delighted Michelle rang the band leader and then would join him for champagne in a few minutes. She rang JD and told him that it was okay.

Steve was wondering whether or not he had been taken for a mug again.

Right, I can go back to sleep/retirement now ! Tvor will be taking up the story next.

Martin Rosen

We start the morning of a new week at Casa Webster where Sophie is looking forward to their upcoming holiday in Majorca and hopes to try jet skis. Rosie looks down on her nose at such a common activity. Sally is examining the electric bill which is a lot higher (what did you expect with a house three times as big as your old one?) Non-electric Bill insists he'll pay his share. He doesn't think there's much chance of getting back with Audrey. Sally asks Bill to come with them and everyone agrees.

Molly and Tyrone head out to face their day, Molly deftly switching sides so that Tyrone doesn't clasp her ringless hand, saying it's tradition for the man to walk on the outside in case of splashes or errant cars. Tyrone, bless 'im, doesn't cotton on and just reckons she's being a bit strange today. She kisses him goodbye and takes off and he toddles across the road to the garage.

Marcus is off to London for his Botox training and staying with someone he used to flatshare with years ago. Sean seems a bit jealous but Marcus reassures him. Eileen is putting on makeup (and may I say that she really looks lovely today) and examining her face for the possibility of the necessity of future treatments.

Michelle is making a list of things she needs for her trip. Steve is pouting and Michelle offers to take Amy to town to buy a book so she can buy herself a foreign language one. They leave, Liz asks Steve a few searching questions. Happy? No answer. Thought not. Liz thinks Michelle is taking advantage of him, fobbing Ryan off on a willing minder (Ryan at 16 and a half might not see it that way). Liz states that that Michelle is walking all over him and he'd better get a grip on the situation.

Rosie arrives at work and shows Tony the invitations to the grand opening of the flats. He's pleased. She's pleased (but all she did was pick them up at the printer!) He's off out, they discuss a bit of business over the construction din in the background. We'll soon see some interior changes in the factory soon though in the meantime, the racket is upsetting the sewers. Rosie is asked to see if the noise can be shut up (or the women) and takes off on an errand.

Steve sips tea in the cafe and Vernon sits down to join him (as if they were mates or something!) Vernon, as usual, doesn't really help matters by telling Steve that Belgians really know how to party. Steve doesn't think Michelle is like that. Outside, Roy has returned from Africa and comes into the cafe, interrupting Vernon who's stories are getting more and more upsetting to Steve. Roy looks around and sees that almost all of his train memorabilia has been replaced by vinyl records and rock and roll posters and guitars, much to his chagrin. Vernon sputters as Roy retrieves a lost locomotive and points out that the poster advertising Burger 'N Fries is incorrect as they serve chips here. He doesn't seem too keen on Vernon's redecorating.

Tony has Jason in tow as he pulls up to a very run down looking neighbourhood. Many of the houses in the terraces are already boarded up and there's a clapped out car and a lot of rubbish littering the area. He tells Jason he's going to tear them all down and build more flats. He wanted Jason to board up the rest of the houses up so squatters don't get in. There's one more tenant left, Mr. Stone, and Tony's going to harass...er...inquire after him. He sends Jason to a local cafe (so there's no witnesses?) and knocks on Jed's door which is promptly slammed in his face.

Molly is humping merchandise on shelves and Auntie Pam arrives. Molly thinks her ring is in one of the jars of pickles that Pam made in the kitchen at Number 9. Molly is frantic. Pam advises putting a plaster on her finger as a delay tactic but she'll sort out the pickle.

In Jed's house, Tony has made it inside. We are treated with a fantastic old photo on the mantle of Minnie Caldwell and a much younger Jed as the camera then follows Tony. Jed is caressing the cat while Tony stalks around the room impatiently. Jed is determined not to move out and end up somewhere really grotty like one of his ex-neighbours. He has no intention of accepting Tony's money. Tony offers to make his life hell but Jed doesn't back down. Tony ups the offer to £1500 (sheesh, that's not much, is it?) Tony says he's not obliged to pay anything and Jed insists he's not obliged to move and won't while there's breath in his body. (I wouldn't give Tony any ideas were I you, Jed!)

Pam arrives at the butcher shop just as Bill is buying one of the jars of pickle. Pam gives Ashley the bad news, she's got to pull the pickle off the shelf as it was made with a wrong sort of vinegar. She promises to resupply him later in the week. The other purchasers were Ted, Norris and Blanche. Ashley assures Bill it really is good but Pam gathers up the jars.

Jed and the kitty see Tony out the door. He peers through the nets as Tony returns to the car where Jason is waiting. Tony makes it sound like he's being patient with the ill old man who's going to be moving to sheltered accommodation soon, but is just finding it a wrench to move.

In the pub, Fiz tells Becky that Roy is back. This plasters a fake smile on her chops but she's not that comfortable with the idea that her judge and jury is again walking the cobbles. Liz asks if Becky and Roy are still on bad terms but Becky just hedges and says they're improving but won't elaborate when Vicki wonders what happened between them. Steve and Becky share a knowing glance as Becky implies it was just a difference of opinion. The girls go back to the table and Becky reveals that Michelle was asked about the tour last week when they went to Karaoke. Liz interjects her opinion that Michelle got back with Steve just so she'd have someone to look after Ryan. Steve sucks a thoughtful tooth. (And gets totally the wrong end of the stick, as per usual)

Sean sees Marcus off at the bus stop. Sean is really going to Miss him (he's only gone for a few days!). They kiss goodbye and Sean waves him off with a sigh.

Tony arranges something on the phone with Jimmy. We'll find out what it is later. Kevin watches as the factory bees return after their lunch break. Kevin glares at Tony as the phone rings. Ah! It's a breakdown call. Kevin takes off with a smile at the prospect of some work.

Over at Number 8, David is lounging on the settee listening to music and doing some gold medal sulking. Gail returns and turns down the music so the formerly noisy neighbours don't complain. David says there's been no word from Tina and hasn't gone to the job centre yet because he's being defeatist, knowing being sacked from two jobs in a row are definitely going to stack the odds against him. Gail answers the phone, looks secretive and decides to take it in the back garden, turning David's music back on as she goes. Wonder who that could be, hmmm???

Steve returns and watches Michelle packing. Now tell me, it looks very much like they're in a little flat but it definitely isn't the downstairs living area with the pub kitchen in back. It looks like the Rovers has grown a flat upstairs and when all that happened, I don't know, especially since Ryan, Amy and Liz still live there too. Do they think we're stupid? Seems so.

Anyway, Steve questions how long Michelle would be away and what to do with Ryan. She says he can go to Nick for awhile and is already planning a short visit to his grandparents in Ireland. Michelle cottons on straight away to what Steve is getting at, that she's using him as a babysitter (to sit a baby that is old enough to babysit Amy!). Michelle tells Steve she'd turned the gig down in the first place, got back together with him because she wanted to, and *then* said yes to the gig. (Ah but she still knew the gig was on and knew that Steve would then be a good option for Ryan-minding, didn't she?! Why else get back together with your fella and then turn around and leave him again?)

Gail is chatting to Joe out in the garden, feeling like a teenager again, sneaking out to see fellas her mother didn't approve of. She smiles and says yes, she'd like to see him again. As she's laughing, David comes out to let her know he's off out.

Kevin arrives at the place where there's a beautiful blonde sat in a car that won't go. Kevin pulls the bonnet up to start troubleshooting.

In the pub, Michelle is hollering at Steve. Becky is serving Eileen who gets the inside info on what the row is about from Becky and Liz. Steve is groveling, Michelle is still ticked off. Roy arrives and Becky spins around.

It turns out all that's wrong with the car is that she's out of petrol. She gets the car started, flatters Kevin and then he sees the breakdown van start up and drive away with the woman driving off very quickly after it. Set up!!!!

Tvor

In the bar at the Rovers, Steve and Michelle are arguing again. This time, Steve accuses Michelle of being too excited about going away from him.Michelle is having none of it and tells Steve she's going to go and finish packing for her tour of Belgium. Meanwhile, Becky and Roy are having a little chat. Roy tells Becky that while he will always have her best interests at heart, Hayley made him realise it would be best if he stop interfering in her day to day business. When Becky asks if Roy is cutting her loose completely, Roy asks if it would be OK to offer a little advice every now and then. "I wouldn't have it any other way, Royston," replies Becky.

Kevin is retelling his tale of woe to Tyrone in the garage- they both think the woman with no petrol was a decoy- as the machinists from the factory stream out, having scored an hour's early mark. Sean is frantically checking his phone for news of Marcus.The girls reassure him that Marcus will ring when he's not busy. Tony Gordon comes out and tells the machinists that they've had a brilliant day which is why they're being let off early from work. Also, because he has some business to attend to, he won't be joining them in a drink on him at the Rovers. Kevin shouts across to Tony, "You must think I'm a mug! That stunt must have taken some organising. How much does summat like that run to?" Tony pleads ignorance. Sally comes over to ask Kevin what's happened. Kevin explains to Sally and has another go at Tony while Sally pleads with Kevin to stop. Tony tells Kevin to think about his family and Sally before he goes any further with his accusations. Kevin tells him, "This ain't over!" before heading back into the garage. Sally looks nonplussed. Tony shoos everyone away and then whispers in Sally's ear, "I've got a feeling your husband doesn't like me!"

In Molly & Tyrone's, Auntie Pam has her hands in the chutney and with three jars left, still hasn't found Molly's engagement ring. Pam tells her who has the remaining three jars and she knows how to get them back. Molly wonders if it isn't time to just tell Tyrone what's happened. Auntie Pam is adamant, she will find the ring before Molly has to say anything.

Kevin is outside the garage talking to the police. He tells the policeman he knows exactly what has happened and who set it up- Tony Gordon of course- but the police can't do anything about it without any proof. Besides, the policeman's heard of a gang in Warrington who have been linked to a number of similar incidents. After some argument from Kevin the policeman gets firm with him. He tells Kevin, "Leave it alone. I know exactly where this is leading and it's not worth it. Stay away from this gentleman and leave us to do our job. Do I make myself clear?" The police leave with Kevin's details and a promise to be in touch. "I won't 'old me breath!" says Kevin. Tyrone wonders if Tony Gordon had anything to do with it after all but one look from Kevin sends him back inside to put the kettle on.

Auntie Pam is trying to get her jar of chutney back from Blanche. It's not as easy as she thinks it's going to be. Blanche refuses to hand over the jar until Pam gives her £10. "Done!" says Blanche, taking the money. "You certainly 'ave been!" says Molly to Pam.

Liam and Maria come in to the Rovers for a drink and see Steve. Maria goes upstairs to help Michelle choose what to pack. Steve gets Liam a drink, presumably on the house. Liam senses that Steve is not happy about Michelle's world tour of Belgium. He tells Steve, "Given the last few months, I'd hate to think that you of all people would begrudge our Michelle a little happiness!" and reminds Steve that Michelle will only be away a couple of weeks and he should be grateful it's not permanent, "you know what I'm sayin'?" Steve knows what he's saying.

Kelly, Fizz, Sean, Sally and Vicki are round a table by the fruit machine. They are talking about whether or not Tony Gordon would be capable of doing the dirty on Kevin. Fizz thinks no, Sean thinks he wouldn't put anything past Tony and Kelly thinks that if Tony was a master criminal, he'd be much more flash about it and blow things up. Vicki tells them all it doesn't matter what they think, it's what Kevin thinks that counts and she can't see Kevin giving up on this easily because he's very angry. Vicki tells Sally she needs to speak to him. Sally pooh poohs that idea and thinks Kevin just has an overactive imagination.

In the garage Kevin is on the phone to his insurance who don't look like they're going to pay out because Kevin's keys were in the ignition. He's not happy. Understandably. Tyrone is shocked on behalf of Kevin. Kevin tells Tyrone that he's sorry but he's going to have to cut down Tyrone's hours in the garage until it's sorted. Poor Kevin is distraught.

Michelle and Maria are talking in the newly-revealed flat upstairs from the Rovers bar. Michelle tells Maria that Steve thinks she's going off on her world tour of Belgium as payback for what he got up to earlier. Maria tells her not to feel guilty and also that she's jealous of her. Maria tells her how fantastic she'll be on the tour. Steve comes upstairs to apologise to Michelle. Maria leaves them to it. Steve tells her he was stupid and that he hopes she has an amazing time. He tells her that he'll miss her and they have a cuddle.

Down in the bar, Sean, Kelly and Fizz are still talking about Kevin and Tony's little altercation. Sean tells them that when Kevin told Tony, "This ain't over!" he got goosebumps. "That Kevin," says Sean, "is all man!" OK, Sean, if you think so. They have a little laugh at Sally and Kevin's expense. Stape comes in with a present for Fizz. A Simpsons box set that he thought Fizz would enjoy. Instead of giving it straight back to him and telling him to stick it where the sun don't shine, Fizz takes it from him and thanks him for the pressie. Stape leaves them. Kelly wonders what planet John Stape is on. "I mean, box set? Needs a box round the ears, more like." Sean wonders where Kevin is when you need him.

Tyrone is telling Maria about Kevin cutting his hours at the garage. Molly is upset but understands in the end. She can't believe their bad luck. Tyrone looks at Molly's ring finger where she has stuck a plaster on. When she lies to him about cutting her finger at work, he kisses it better for her. Are these two the sweetest couple ever, or what? Tyrone goes to the bar just as Pam comes in with the news that it looks like Norris must have the jar of chutney with the ring in it.

At the bar, Tom (Liam's best man/cousin, I think) is wearing some sort of horrible shirt which he reckons he and Liam are going to make a fortune from. Tom waits for a pint while Sean faffs about with his phone behind the bar, neglecting to serve his customers. Now is it just me or does Tom indulge in a little flirting with Sean, buying him a drink and everything....

Tony stands at Jed Stone's front door looking all evil in a handsome kind of way. When Jed Stone answers the door, Tony barges his way inside despite being threatened with the police. He tells Jed Stone that he has a check for £2500 for Jed to move. Not open to negotiation. Jed clutches his arm and keels over. "Spare me the fake heart attack routine!" says Tony, callously while it looks like there's nothing fake about this heart attack at all. Tony goes out into the street where a bit of camera work suggests that there might be someone watching Tony from across the road. (I've nothing to back that up though, it might be a suggestion of somebody watching him, it might just be fancy camera-work.) When Tony thinks nobody has seen him, he goes back inside, shutting Jed's front door behind him. He looks down at Jed menacingly.

In the Rovers, Pam is trying to get the jar of chutney back from Emily and Norris using secret recipes and family honour as excuses for needing it back. Molly watches from across the room. Emily and Norris tell her they'd love to be able to return the jar but it's already been donated as a part of a hamper prize in a church fete raffle. They refuse to rig the raffle ensuring that Pam wins back the hamper but suggest that maybe she could buy a couple of tickets.

Fizz leaves the pub. She stops by to give Stape his DVDs back before she goes. She tells him that her DVD player is not working which is why she's giving them back. Stape offers to go round to her and fix the DVD player. Fizz agrees to it.

At Jed Stone's house, the cat is miaowing all over Jed. Tony kicks it gently away from the body. He gets on the blower to Jason to tell him to get down to Nightingale Terrace and get on that job he wanted him to do earlier (board it up to stop squatters). He tells Jason, "Yeah, God does indeed work in mysterious ways..." He steps over the body and back out into the street where it looks once again like somebody could be watching him from across the road, behind a broken pane of glass. He calls the ambulance.

In the Rovers, Sean is on the phone to Marcus again telling him how much he misses him. Already? Tom looks on in the background and then calls for a beer. Sean finishes up his call and goes to Liam and Tom where again, Tom may or may not have indulged in a spot of flirting with him. Arrggghhhh! What's going on here?

At Fizz's Stape has fixed her DVD player. He remarks how flash "their" telly was and how he made a good choice. He goes to leave. Fizz mentions that she'll make a night of watching The Simpsons. Stape leaves....... very....... slowly....... waiting for that invitation to join her. It looks like she almost gives in at one point but, phew!, she doesn't and he sees himself out.

The ambulance has turned up at Nightingale Terrace for Jed Stone. Tony watches them, stroking Jed's cat like Blofeld. He tells the ambos that there's no family to contact and that he will look after the house and that Mr Stone is due to go into sheltered accommodation. He asks if Jed will be OK. The ambo tells him, "You never know but I wouldn't get your hopes up." After the ambulance leaves, Tony outs the cat down and tells it, "Did you hear that? Sounds like you're on yer own!" Jason pulls up in the builders' van. Tony tells him to secure the house for now and they'll sort it out tomorrow. He mentions a bonus for Jason for a job well done. As Jason goes to secure the house, Tony casts an evil eye over the street that he plans to tear down....

Stella McLoughlin

Jason and Tyrone come out of their front doors. They're off to do the boarding-up job for Tony. He meets them in the Street and gives them the keys.

Julie and Fiz step out of their door. Julie is pressing Fiz to ask Tony Gordon if there's a job at the factory for her. They catch sight of him and Julie urges her to ask him then and there but Fiz says she's not asking him in the Street and will catch him at break time. She warns Julie there may only be holiday cover.

Leanne walks into the corner shop. Dev and Molly are enjoying a cuppa and a plate of biscuits. Molly tells Leanne Dev hasn't got eyes for anyone else since he met the Bollywood star of his youth became his new best friend. Dev protests that Nina and her husband Prem are both his friends. Leanne hands Dev the keys to his new apartment, much to his delight. Leanne invites him to the special champagne opening ceremony at 3 pm, which delights him even more. Molly then turns to Dev. "Seeing as you're out this afternoon is there any chance I can have a couple of hours off this morning?" He asks where she's going that's so important and she tells him it's the church fete. He looks puzzled. "Don't ask, please," she says.

Jason and Tyrone are in Jed Stone's house. Jason tells Tyrone that even Sally thinks Kevin is barmy for not accepting Tony's offer, it's a good price for a new start somewhere new. "What's the downside?" he asks. Tyrone says that Kevin doesn't want to move, but his attention is on more immediate matters. He looks in the fridge and asks if Jason's sure the owner has moved out as there's food in there and the milk is fresh. He then opens a cupboard and finds a biscuit tin full of money. "You don't move out and leave your savings," he points out. Jason tells him to put it to one side, the bloke is ancient and has probably forgotten about it. Tyrone is not convinced.

In the taxi office, Eileen is trying her best to wind Steve up by talking about Michelle getting her revenge. Just then Fiz comes in, she needs a cab to pick Chesney up from the airport. John jumps up and says he'll do it and off they go.

Molly and Pam arrive at the church fete (funny day to hold it if you ask me!) and find Emily. Pam asks if they can have the jar of pickle out of the hamper, they'll replace it, she says, but Emily refuses, saying it's been advertised and they can't mislead anybody. Eventually she suggests they go and speak to the chairman, but Pam doesn't want to do that when she sees who it is. He's Trading Standards and once tried to nick her for selling dodgy videos. She decides on Plan B and they ask Blanche and Norris if they'll help by buying lots of raffle tickets on their behalf. Blanche argues until Pam offers 20 pounds each for their trouble.

Tony Gordon arrives at Jed Stone's house. Tyrone asks him where the bloke that lived there has gone. Tony asks why it's any of his business. Tyrone points out that all his stuff is still there, even money. Tony says he'll get it to him, and says he spends too much time listening to Kevin Webster. He adds, sarcastically, if he's checked the back yard to see if Kevin's tow truck is out there. Tyrone says he won't slag Kevin off and Tony commends his loyalty but says that Kevin won't necessarily be loyal to him. If business gets really bad Tyrone could find himself out of a job.

The raffle begins at the church fete. The first prize winner chooses a bottle of whisky, much to Pam and Molly's relief. Blanche happens to win the next prize and says she fancies the bottle of gin. Pam nearly chokes. "Why would I want a hamper full of things that people would donate to a raffle?" Blanche asks. "Blanche….please…" says poor Molly. "I'll buy you a bottle," says Pam quickly. "Good stuff?" says Blanche. "Of course," says Pam. "I'll take the hamper," says Blanche to Emily.

After the break we find Blanche and Norris examining the contents of the hamper. Blanche tells Pam and Molly that on second thoughts she'll give the money back and keep the hamper. "You agreed!" says Molly, dismayed. Blanche says that now she's not agreeing, not until they tell her why they want the pickle, and she gets Norris to carry it out for her.

Molly turns to Pam and says they'll have to tell her about the ring. Pam reckons that not only will Blanche find out they'd been lying about where the pickle came from, she'd probably think the ring was hers by rights and would be off down the pawn shop with it.

Jason and Tyrone report back to Tony that the contents of the house are in the skip and the house is boarded up. "Excellent," he says, and pays them a hundred pounds each. Just then Kevin comes out and sees this transaction. "You working for him?" he asks. Jason says that Tyrone has just been helping him out. Kev wants to know what they've been doing and is told they were just boarding up an old house. "I hope you checked it was empty first," says Kevin, "I wouldn't put owt past ‘im."

John's taxi carrying Fiz and Chesney arrives back in the Street. Ches gets out and tells Fiz to make sure she pays the full rate, they don't want any favours from him. Just then Ken comes along and tries to make conversation with Chesney about his trip but Ches just mutters and goes inside. "Jet lag," laughs Fiz.

Pam and Molly arrive at the Barlow's with Blanche's gin. "Why are you being so bloody minded?" Pam asks her. Blanche says they're behaving like the jar of pickle is the crown jewels. Ken tries to reason with her, but Blanche says he's too trusting, hasn't he ever heard of drugs being stashed into smelly places to fool sniffer dogs. "You don't think that Molly looks like a drug smuggler do you?" asks Ken. "Did Tracy look like a murderer?" retorts Blanche. Thinking quickly Pam tells her that a rival company has been spreading rumours that their pickle is laced with laxatives. She doesn't think it's true, but that's the last jar in the batch. Horrified, Blanche tells them that she's had some and if she gets so much as wind she'll be seeing them in court. She reaches for the gin bottle. "Gin's supposed to be good for an upset stomach, isn't it?"

Jed Stone is lying in his hospital bed. Tony Gordon arrives and Jed asks if he's come to gloat. Tony says he thought he might thank him for saving his life. "I'm not moving anywhere," says Jed, and tells him to get that into his thick skull. He then asks what Tony did with Sonny Jim, his cat. "Do I look like the RSPCA?" says Tony, and tells him that he's salvaged his things, putting the biscuit tin down on the table. He adds that the house has been boarded up and asks if he'll continue being obstructive or will accept the big fat cheque which is more than enough to replace his furniture. Jed tells him to shove it and Tony menacingly threatens to put the pillow over Jed's face. "But why bother," he hisses, "when nobody cares whether you live or die." Leaving the cheque on the bed he walks out.

Chesney is asking Kirk and Julie whether Fiz has seen much of John while he's been away, have they been going out? Kirk, sporting his present of wide sideburns attached to dark glasses responds with "Uh-huh-huh," which isn't really helpful. "No they haven't," says Julie. Kirk then agrees that they haven't, he just likes going ‘Uh-huh-huh'. Julie giggles and takes the glasses off him and says that it's nice that Fiz has been able to forgive John. Chesney says she didn't see the state Fiz was in at Christmas and he'll always hate John for that. Fiz comes downstairs then and tells Chesney there's nothing to worry about.

Julie asks if she got a chance to speak to Mr. Gordon. Fiz says she did and he said he'll see. Kirk notices that the dvd is fixed and wants to know how Fiz did it, so he can do it if it goes wrong again. Fiz confesses that John did it. "John!" exclaims Chesney. Fiz explains that he'd lent her a dvd and she couldn't watch it. Julie thinks he seems like a nice man. "Oh yeah, a real charmer," says Chesney sarcastically. "Uh-huh-huh," says Kirk, having put the dark glasses on again.

The grand champagne opening ceremony is in full swing outside the flats. Rita asks Dev if he's moving in there and he tells her he is. "Are you?" he asks. She says she'd love to, but it all depends on Tony buying The Kabin, which in turn depends on Kevin selling him the garage, so she's not holding her breath. Rosie flits around with glasses of champagne on a tray, and Liam's cousin Tom looks around him thoughtfully and tells Liam that they could go into property development. "Is this before, during or after you become internet millionaires?" asks Maria.

Rita goes over to Sally (shouldn't she be at work?) and says she's sure they'll be long silences at their dinner table if Kevin finds out she's been there. Tony then makes a speech and hopes that Victoria Court breathes new life into Weatherfield.

Pam and Molly have emptied out the pickle jar and they haven't found the ring. "What am I going to tell Tyrone?" moans Molly. Pam urges her to lie, but Molly says she's lost Vera's ring, she's not going to make it worse by lying to Tyrone about it. "There's no helping some people," says Pam.

The champagne party has moved inside one of the flats. Prem says that he hopes Dev got a good discount. Leanne asks Dev if he's happy and he says he is. "I'll have to come to the flat warming then," she chirps, and wanders off with her tray of champagne. Nina asks Dev who his little friend is. "It's a long story," says Dev. It seems that half the factory workforce is at the party (why?) and Sean has been trying unsuccessfully to get hold of Marcus. Wiki tells him that Marcus is on a course he probably can't switch his phone on.

Rosie is studying the picture she took on her phone of Liam kissing Carla,(she's still got it then - a time bomb waiting to go off!) when Sally comes up and tells her she's not old enough to be drinking and she shouldn't be when she's supposed to be working, but Rosie tells her not to worry her job is safe and so is Sally's. Besides, it's champagne, that's not drinking!

Tyrone goes home, pleased with his hundred pounds. Molly seems less than delighted - and then she confesses that she's lost the ring. "She's looked everywhere," says Pam. Tyrone goes over to a drawer. "You've not looked in here," he says, holding it up, "because Jack found it and put it away for safe keeping!" (Then why, oh why, didn't he tell her?)

Rita sees Kevin outside his garage. "No news of your tow truck?" she asks. Kevin reckons he'll only see it again if he says yes to Tony Gordon. "With you he's Mr Nice Guy," he tells her, "with me he's the flippin' Godfather!" Rita says if that's true he'll not stop until he's put Kevin out of business, and what's the point of being right if that happens.

Meanwhile, Tony is still at the party, talking to his friend on his mobile phone. He says he wants to see ‘him' (presumably Kevin?) on his knees, and then have him grovel some more. Liam overhears the tail end of this. Tony tells him he sets himself goals and if something's worth having it's worth fighting for. "Even if it means fighting dirty?" says Liam.

In the hospital bed, Jed opens his tin and looks at photos of Minnie Caldwell and himself as a much younger man. He puts his head back on the pillow and weeps.

Back at the party, Dev makes a toast to Tony. "To a winner!" he says.

Annie Logan

Chesney and Fiz are chatting. Fiz asked him what he was doing that day. He said he was going to see Kayleigh and give her a necklace that he brought back for her from Las Vegas. Fiz wondered if he had bought it himself, but Chesney said that his mother was with him. Chesney then asks her what is going on with John Stape. She tells him nothing is going on. Chesney claimed that he still fancied her, but Fiz confirmed she was not interested.

Julie runs downstairs to see Tony Gordon who is outside. She is hoping for job. Tony is outside talking to Jason about the premises he his cleaning and boarding up, Jason said he would finish it that day. Tony asked him to come and see him when he has finished. Jason wonders about the old guy that was living there. Tony tells him that he has probably gone off to Florida with the money he has been paid. Julie then bounds up to Tony and introduces herself as a friend of Fiz's. She says that Fiz said there maybe a job going for her. Tony seemed to be a bit taken aback and told her to come back and see him later that morning. (err, what time would that be 10.30am, 11am ....?!!)

In the Kabin, Emily says she is going into town and asks Rita if she wants anything. Rita says she has two of everything, and wonders how she will get on when she moves. Norris suggested that she doesn't. Emily remarked that it would be an end of an era, but she should do what she wanted.

Prem and Nina arrive outside Dev's emporium of delight (okay it is the corner shop!). Inside Amber was asking Dev if he knew the meaning of holiday. He replies that it means helping her father with the business! When they walk into the shop Prem looked at Amber and asked her why she was there, when she could be enjoying the summer sun. Dev turns and explains that he was just saying that to her, and tells her to go out. Amber gave him a piercing stare and went out. Nina explained they were in the area, so they thought they would pop in. Prem tells him that if he needs carpets, curtains etc., that he is to come to him. Then Nina offered to help him with the colour scheme for the new flat. She said they ought to get together when they both have some free time.

Outside the factory Tony is talking to Rosie (or is it her ample bosom he is talking to ?!) and says that he tries to be straight with people, but it is difficult when people don't trust him that it is in their best interests. He then drops a not-to-subtle hint about her father. He tells her he will be back in the afternoon.

Outside Dev's shop, Prem and Nina are about to leave when Nina asks him to go to the Kabin to buy some mints. Dev says that he sells them, but Nina tells him he would not let her pay for them.

In the Kabin, Rita gets a call from Emily on the mobile phone (cell phone). Emily wants to speak to Norris. She explains to him that she was in a shop and couldn't remember her PIN number was for her credit card. She explains that it he goes to her dressing table drawer, that it is written down there on a piece of paper. Norris hesitates and says that he wouldn't normally go in there. She gives him permission and as he dashes across the road she tells him it is in the right hand drawer where she keeps all her private papers. He finds the paper and reads her out the number (if you all think I am going to reprint the number here, you are joking - I am gong first to clean out her account !!!!!!). As he was about to put the paper back in the drawer he notices a brown envelope and to his annoyance it was sealed. He puts it back in the drawer and heads back for the Kabin.

Kevin tells Tyrone in the garage to look after things while he goes away on holiday. Tyrone queries that there may not be any work, and wonders should he twiddle his thumbs ! He also asks what he should do if he is offered another job. Kevin replies that it wouldn't happen unless he went and looked for one. So Tyrone asks what he should do if he went out and looked for a job and was offered it. Kevin getting annoyed tells him to do what he wants, and maybe his mate Tony Gordon would offer him one.

Tina sees David heading towards the kebab shop. She tells Darryl that he is stalking her. Darryl thinks it looks as if he has nothing to do because she had lost him his job. Anyway, he walks into the shop and offers Tina the Leeds Festival tickets once again, explaining that he has paid for them and doesn't want to waste them. She told him in no uncertain terms that she didn't want them. David says he understood that they were no longer going out together, but felt they could still go together (pushing it, lad !). He then calls her stupid. She thinks it is because she won't go with him, but he says it is because she won't do what she really wants. He reminds her that he did ask. He walks out of the shop with Tina yelling that she knows he has asked, but just wish he would now stop. Tina then sees through the window, David talking to Amber. She is looking at the tickets and is nodding her head. Tina then mimics Amber by talking in a squeaky voice, "oh thank you David" . Tina pretends not to be jealous.

Back in the Kabin, Norris tells Rita about the envelope. Rita sternly tells him not to open it because it is personal and private. Norris said he had not intention of doing so, but it was obvious that he was itching to know its contents.

Aaah, Chesney gives Kayleigh the necklace he bought for her. She is delighted and says it must of cost a lot of money. Chesney says she was worth it and she put her arms around him and gave him a kiss (aaah!). But suddenly there was a shout. It was Kenzie Judd (boo - hiss!) who warned Kayleigh that she would turn ginger like him if they continued to snog. She tells him to leave them alone. Kenzie suggests she comes with him instead. She tells him that she is not going to go with him even if he paid her.

Emily has arrived back from her shopping and pops into the Kabin to thank Norris for getting her PIN number. He casually asks her whether the number is of any great significance. She then started signing the hymn "Guide Me O Thou Great Redeemer" (yes, I know it is on the tip of your tongue!). She said it was one of her favourite hymns and then asked what number it was in 'Ancient and Modern' ....... Norris then assured her that her secret was safe with them, (he had no need to tell Rita what it is), and that she shouldn't go to the bother of changing it. Rita stared at him as he said that she could trust him with any secret she had.

Back at what may turn out to be the fight of the year (!), Kenzie starts shoving little Chesney. Provoking Chesney he asks what he is going to do about it. Chesney bravely responds that if he does it again, he would find out. Kenzie shoves him again, and this time Chesney jumps up and flew at him. He is no match for Kenzie who shoves him away and punches him in the face. Kayleigh starts to scream in fright and tries to drag him off little Chesney. Obviously this had no effect. However, just in the nick of time, John Stape is passing in his minicab; sees what is happening and pushes Kenzie (who he recognises from his days at school) away. Kenzie tells him to back off because he is not his teacher any more. John then went head to head woth Kenzie and warned him that he isn't so he had better watch himself. Kenzie stepped back. John told him to go away, and warned him that if he catches him fighting again he will inform the Police. Kayleigh asks Chesney if he is alright, and he confirms he is. John offers to tak e Chensey home, in case those boys are still hanging around. Chesney refuses the offeer and calls to Kayleigh to come with him. She thanks John.

Sally turns up at the garage as Kevin is tidying up to go home. She asks him how it has been that day, to which he replies that it maybe a good time to go on holiday. He seems down so she tells him that she is on his side. Kevin says he understood, and that they would get through it.

Julie goes to tell Fiz that she had met with Tony Gordon and she has a job starting on Monday. Fiz was more interested in seeing Chesney. Julie says she hasn't seen him but then spots him on the bench across the road. Chesney becomes visibly annoyed when he sees John's car driving past Fiz and beeping his horn in a greeting. Fiz sees Chesney's face. She wants to know who did this to him. Fiz is beside herself with shock and anger when he accuses John. He says that is what John is really like.

Martin Rosen

Fizz is marching furiously through the street, looking for John Stape. She barges into Streetcars and disturbs Eileen who is snoozing at the desk and demands to know where John Stape is. Meanwhile, Chesney goes home where Kirkeh asks what happened to him.

At Molly and Tyrone's, Ty wonders if he could earn a few more quid by doing odd jobs when he realises, by looking at the paper, that tomorrow is his mother's birthday. Molly tells him to get on the blower quick-smart to Jackie to wish her a happy birthday in lieu of a birthday card.

Fizz is looking out of the kebab shop window, listening to Tina prattle on about the weather for David's concert date with Amber (she hopes it rains on them) when Fizz sees John Stape pull up in his taxi. She rushes outside to confront him. She gives him a good thumping before John knows what's going on. Through the shrieking and screaming, John makes it clear to Fizz that it was Kenzie Judd who thumped Chesney, not him. He urges Fizz to get the story from Kayleigh Morton.

Out in their back yards, Darrell gives David a report on how Tina has behaved since she found out about David and Amber's date, over the back fence. "She's gutted," Darrell tells David, "well, she couldn't even concentrate enough to fill a ketchup bottle." David asks him if he thinks that if he ditches Amber and offers to take Tina, would she come, but Darrell thinks there's not a chance. Gail comes out to chat for a bit and scares off Darrell by asking about young folks' music so she can have a bit of privacy to talk excitedly to her new squeeze on the mobile.

Fizz goes to the Mortons' to ask the truth about what happened between Ches, John and Kenzie Judd. Kayleigh clears everything up. She asks if Chesney is OK. "Not entirely, no!" says Fizz, a bit peeved.

Gail shoos off David and Amber on their date. No sooner has she said goodbye than Joe pulls up outside the house in his flash motor and rushes Gail inside.

In the Kabin, Norris is put out by Rita making herself a coffee and not making him one and refers to all the secrecy these days. When questioned his meaning by Emily, he says, "Well let me put it this way: This sneaky coffee making is not the first time I've been left out of the loop!" Norris storms off through the back. Rita lets on to Emily what Norris is on about- the envelope in the drawer. "Oh dear...." says Emily.

Fizz has gone to apologise to John at Streetcars for belting him. She offers to make it all up to him by buying him a pint in the Rovers the next time they're there. Janice calls for a taxi but specified, "Any driver but that John Stape!" so it seems that Fizz is more prepared to see John's mended ways than anyone else.

Out in the street, Kirkeh is playing football with Ches when Fizz comes and sends Kirk away so she can speak with Chesney about what happened, out in the street in full view and in earshot of anybody walking past. As you do. They sit down and Chesney tells her that he lied because John Stape is a creep and he's worried that Fizz will let him back in and hurt Fizz all over again. Fizz tells him that's not going to happen. "Look at me," she says to her brother, "I am not stupid, OK? I might not be the brightest button in the box but I'm not so daft as to give John Stape a second chance!" They have a little hug.

Out in their back yard, Tyrone and Molly are talking about how it seems Jackie has disappeared. Tyrone has left loads of messages for her but he can't seem to find her. Tyrone resorts to calling Linda, Jackie's best friend. Linda tells him that Jackie left Spain months ago but nobody knows where she is. Molly gets a bit excited and tells Tyrone she feels like they're getting warmer, like being on the hunt for a dangerous killer. Tyrone protests his mother is not a killer, genuinely a bit hurt that Molly would joke about that. "Me Mum 'as never been done for anything worse than shoplifting or robbery!" he assures her. Molly stands corrected. "Oh, and assault," he adds as an afterthought.

In the Rovers, Fizz comes into the bar where John is being given a hard time by Sean. When Sean asks her if she wants Sean to throw him out, Fizz tells him everything's OK. In a booth by the window, Norris bemoans the fact that Emily doesn't seem to trust him. When Rita protests that we all have secrets, Norris assures her that he doesn't. "Really?" Rita feigns surprise and then asks, "Did you tell Emily that you'd found that envelope?" Of course, that's different, according to Norris. Rita tells Norris that she told Emily about Norris and the envelope. Emily comes into the bar. She tells Norris that she has a cottage pie in the oven and after tea, she will show him what's in the envelope. Norris is a bit flummoxed.

At Gail's, Joe suggests sitting out in the sunshine. Gail protests- the neighbours might see! The phone rings. Gail is thrown into a panic wondering who it is. She answers the phone to her mother who is wondering what she's up to for the evening. "Oh hello, Mam! Oh, eh, just watching telly. You know, on me own...."

Kevin comes into the Rovers. He's not best pleased to see John and Fizz having a drink together. He wonders out loud what Fizz is doing. Tyrone, who is having a drink with Molly, tells him to forget about it and just not to let John wind him up. At the bar, more flirting between Tom and Sean. Kevin watches as John and Fizz chat about Chesney. Fizz apologises again. Kevin barges over and chases John out of the pub telling him, "You're not wanted round here!"

Marcus comes into the pub. Sean is angry with him because he's late. They have a mini-tiff. Sean rails at Marcus, "I'm here slaving away, trying to support your career and what thanks do I get?" Marcus is left speechless.

Fizz finds John outside the pub. John tells her that he knows he deserves everything he gets and he goes to leave. But Fizz still owes him that drink and tells him to come with her. "Come on," she eggs him on, "what's the worst that could happen?" They go back around the corner together.

After dinner at Emily's and Emily presents Norris with the envelope which he is free to open and read if he is absolutely sure he wants to. Emily doesn't want Norris to feel as if she is keeping secrets from him. After being made to promise not to breathe a word of the contents to another living soul until after her death, Norris practically snatches the envelope from Emily. He is disappointed to find all it contains is instructions for her funeral. Emily wonders what he was expecting, "Sordid confessions?" Now she knows that Norris's curiosity has been satisfied, she goes back to reading her paper.

In Fizz's place, she and John are chatting while she does some very bad folding of laundry. Honestly, how the residents of Coronation St never learned how to fold laundry, I'll never know. She tells John a bit about what Cilla's up to- emigrating to South Africa- and how things are working out as she looks after her little brother. John says it doesn't seem very fair on Fizz that she has to be Chesney's mother in the absence of Cilla. "I''ve no choice have I?" Fizz shows a chink in her armour but then remembers, "He's growing up, it won't be forever."

At Gail's it seems she has ruined the paella she was cooking for Joe. It was a good thing though because Joe is allergic to seafood. They enjoy a pizza together. Gail reminds Joe that he doesn't have to scoot off any time soon since David won't be back until after midnight plus, she wonders if he should wait until it's dark before he leaves. She obviously hasn't thought about Tina recognising her own father's motor parked outside Gail's house- duhhh! Anyway Joe says, "I can't work out whether you're attracted to the danger of our situation or, whether you're so ashamed of me, you don't want anybody to know I'm here." Gail jokes that she hasn't decided yet.

Tina and Darrell are having a slow night at the Kebab Shop. Tina's in a charmer of a mood again and fantasises about serving David's head all sliced up and in a warm pita bread. Yeah... she's not the only one.

At Fizz's, John and Fizz are having a can of beer together. More chinks in Fizz's armour as she tells him that she missed him, for ages. John reciprocates and Fizz leans in for a kiss. They lock lips briefly before John freaks out and apologises for spoiling things. He rushes out. Fizz seems disappointed but confused.

In the Rovers, Tom and Liam are having a very boring conversation about something or other. Cardboard boxes. Marcus apologises to Sean for "everything Sean wants him to be sorry for". They look forward to making up after their little row. Tyrone's phone rings- it's Jackie. Tyrone reckons she sounded funny, subdued. Molly tells Tyrone that she thinks it's about time she met the legendary Jackie Dobbs. Tyrone looks terrified at the prospect of Molly meeting his gem of a mother.

Stella McLoughlin

Molly's standing outside the corner shop, worrying about making a good impression on Tyrone's mother. Dev hands her a couple of bunches of flowers and tells her they're on the house. He tells her it's important to get on the right side of the mother in law, and she must be confident. Just then Ty appears with a birthday card he's just bought for his mother. Molly remarks that his mother can't be doing too badly if she's living in Chorlton. "Who says she's paying rent?" says Tyrone, "or who's to say this Fat Madge isn't more than just a mate? Or Maybe she's found herself another squat!"

Jerry and Teresa are in the garden, he watches as she hangs out the washing and comments that he doesn't remember them being this domesticated when they were young and slim. He then tells her that Manny phoned. "I didn't hear it ring," she says. He then confesses that he phoned Manny, and that he'll meet her at the flat tomorrow evening and help her unpack. She tells him she hasn't got the deposit. "Well I have," he says. She says she won't accept it, she's not interested in his handouts. He insists, saying it will be nice for the kids if she's local. She stares at him for a moment and then goes off inside.

In the cafe, Vernon is getting a bit carried away drumming on the counter with a couple of forks while Chesney watches in amazement and Fiz and Maria look up, startled, as he loses his grip and they fly past. He tells Chesney they were this close to a support slot with the Flying Pickets. Chesney however, has never heard of them so is less than impressed.

Over at the table, Maria is horrified to hear that Fiz kissed John Stape. "Keep your voice down, Ches will hear," says Fiz. Maria says she's right back to square one, and he will now think it's all systems go. Fiz says it wasn't like that, he was mortified. "I bet he was!" says Maria, sarcastically. Fiz flashes with annoyance, and snaps, "Oh, sitting pretty in your perfect relationship are you?" Maria looks aghast and Fiz backs down and apologises. Maria in turn apologises to her, saying that real mates don't sit in judgement. She just doesn't want Fiz going through what she went through over Liam and Carla, and that was all in her head. "John and Rosie were real." Fiz says she's not telling her anything she hasn't told herself.

Over in the taxi office, John is in a very cheerful mood. "Had a breakthrough with Fiz?" asks Eileen, perceptive as ever. John is amazed. "You're a witch!" he says, "I'm officially impressed." Eileen then demands to know what's happened and he tells her they kissed. "Blimey!" says Eileen. John says that the anger has gone from Fiz's eyes, she's still hurt but the anger has gone. Eileen asks what's next on the master plan. John says there's no plan, he thinks Fiz just felt sorry for him. "Don't rush it," advises Eileen. John says that's the last thing he's going to do, they breathe the same air and they've had a kiss, that'll do him for a while.

Tyrone and Molly park outside the house where his mother is living. Molly worries about the way she looks but Ty tells her not to expect too much. "She's not like your average mum," he says. She tells him to stop worrying.

There's packing going on in the Webster's household as they prepare to go off on holiday. Sally is upset to learn that Tony Gordon is getting Julie in to cover for her while she's away. She's worried that she's being edged out of her job now. "Tony wouldn't edge you out Mum," says Rosie, trying to be helpful, "you're his third best machininst."

Tyrone and Molly knock at the door and it's opened by a vision with pink hair wearing a kaftan. "Me baby!" she squeals, hugging him. "What've you done to your hair?" says Tyrone and then introduces Molly. Jackie tells her she's got a fantastic aura and invites them in. As they go past her, Jackie looks up and down the road with a worried expression. She follows them in, closing the door behind her, apparently not noticing that across the road someone with tattooed fingers tapping a steering wheel is watching her.

John pulls up in his taxi as Fiz is walking down the Street. He gets out and they stare across the road at each other for a few moments and after saying Hiya, he tells her his brain's gone blank. He then apologises if he overstepped the mark last night. After a pause she tells him that last night reminded her of how much she misses him, and to be honest it's set her back a bit. She doesn't want to be that vulnerable again. He says he doesn't want to jeopardise anything - if there's anything to jeopardise. Hope springs eternal, he has to believe that or he might as well drive off the edge of the earth. He tells her he'll see her around, and after another awkward pause they go their separate ways.

Molly asks Jackie if the house belongs to Madge. Jackie tells her that the fat girl rules the roost and they've been curled up together all morning. Assuming that indicates a gay relationship, Molly tells her she's got a K D Lang cd and she admires her values. Jackie then points out a cat on the chair - Fat Madge!

David has taken Amber into the kebab shop and is telling Darryl all about the concert, making sure he's loud enough for Tina to hear, and Tina obviously doesn't like it.

Outside in the garden, Molly comments that they're all together now and that's the main thing. Jackie touches Molly's face and says it's very healing of her, she's not just a pair of piercing blue eyes. Tyrone asks if she's back on the drugs again. Jackie tells him he's sounding hostile and hands him a crystal telling him to feel the serenity. Ty says he'd feel a lot more serenity if she would just keep in touch. She agrees that he deserves better. She explains that she got the sack from a job in a cafe in Toremolinos and a couple called Ewan and Breanna spotted something in her. They're very soulful. They asked her to housesit while they went to Cuba and all she has to do is look after Fat Madge. "But you hate cats!" says Tyrone. Jackie tells him she's ever-evolving, she doesn't do hate any more.

Back at the Morton's, Jerry complains that he's sweating. Teresa points out that it is August. Jerry says that Gail thinks he should see a doctor but Teresa snorts and says that Gail thinks she Dr Quinn, Medicine Woman, all he needs is rest. He says he does nothing but rest, and picks up his phone to call the doctor. "Well, they'll love you," says Teresa, "calling them out on a Sunday." This makes Jerry think twice and he puts the phone down.

Molly asks Jackie where they can go for lunch - their treat. She suggests they go further afield seeing as Ty and Molly have a car. She asks Molly to take a photo on her mobile phone of her holding the cat, which she sends to Madge's owners. "That's just bought be a couple of hours of freedom," she smiles. Just then there's a bump in the hallway and Jackie nearly jumps out of her skin, but it's just the new phone book coming through the door. When Molly's gone up to the loo Ty asks his mother if everything all right. She assures him that everything's fine.

Tina and Darryl are standing in the shop doorway, watching Amber and David who are sitting at the bus stop. Just then Maria approaches and Darryl comments that the job just got 110 percent better. "You do serving, I'll do flirting," he tells Tina. "Oh no, what if she wants to leave her totally gorgeous husband and run away with you?" mocks Tina. "Never say never, Tina," he replies. Maria walks right past and Tina laughs, and then tells Darryl she's sussed David out. "He thinks he can make me jealous with some schoolie whose dad wants her home by seven…." He interrupts her, "He'd be right on the money!"

We then see Jackie having a cigarette outside a pub and then she goes inside. A short distance away someone is watching her.

The Websters load up their vehicle with their suitcases. Rosie comes running up saying she's been to check out the situation with Sally's job and Tony has assured her it's just holiday cover. She waves a 20 pound note saying that the ice creams are on him. Kevin snatches it out of her hand. "Twenty quid?" he says, "shouldn't it be 30 pieces of silver?" Sally tells him not to have a go at Rosie, she's just a child. Rosie tells them that Tony was really nice and that her mum's job is safe. Kevin then tears the note up, saying she can post it back to him from Majorca. "That is such a waste of money," says Rosie. "Yes," says Kevin, "his money!"

In the pub, Jackie is admiring Molly's ring and wondering who she'll talk to at the wedding. Then she tells Tyrone that they've bonded. "Me and the Mollster are going to be bezzies!" She turns to Molly, "I'll have to take you girly shop lifting!" Seeing the expression on Ty's face she quickly tells him she was only joking and they giggle. Just then Ty looks towards the window and sits up straight with shock. "Scary Brian!" he says, seeing a figure looking through the glass. "Where?" cries Jackie, but the figure has gone. Tyrone explains to Molly that he was a mate of his dad's years ago. "And he's scary!" says Jackie looking terrified. "Come on, how much do you owe him?" asks Tyrone. Jackie gets up to leave but then realises that she's safer in the crowded pub. "We'll look after you," says Molly as Jackie starts to panic.

Jerry is sitting on the sofa obviously feeling very ill. Teresa suggests he goes to bed, but he says that's boring. She then suggests she calls the doctor but he tells her he'll see how he is in the morning. If he still feels bad he'll go over to the medical centre. She points out that it's a bank holiday, and anyway, those places are full of germs. He'd come back feeling ten times worse. "If I felt ten times worse I'd be six feet under," he says. She tells him he needs sleep and urges him to go up to bed.

Scary Brian comes over to their table and tells Jackie he wants his money. She tells him she's sorting it. He tells her she owes him a grand. She says she only borrowed 500. He replies that she then legged it from Spain, so now it's a grand that she owes. He turns to Tyrone and says she's got 24 hours. Jackie jumps up and runs away from the table, calling "Sorry Ty," as she goes. Brian watches her go and then turns back to Tyrone and tells him he knows where she lives, a friend spotted her in a deli. Molly asks if he'll leave her alone once he gets his money back. He says he'll be at her place at 3pm tomorrow and wants a grand in cash. "Don't mess me about," he says as he leaves.

Anne Logan

Is it Monday again? Happy Bank Holiday! Did you know they deliver milk on a bank hol? They do in Chorlton where Tyrone is sat in the car watching the house where Jackie lives. (that sounds a bit like a nursery rhyme, doesn't it?) Molly's sleeping in the back and Tyrone is rumpled and unshaven. Surely they didn't sit there all night?

Gail's fixing a flower pot in her front garden. Jerry comes slowly across the street. Gail looks him over with worry in her eye. He doesn't look good. He reckons it's just taking longer than he expected and he says that Teresa will be gone today as Mel's returning from her hols. Gail suggests there could be a marital reconciliation in the works but Jerry is firm that isn't going to happen though he allows that his ex has been very good to him and the kids in this time of crisis. He heads home and Gail watches him, concerned.

Molly's fetched coffees. Ty reckons his mother probably did a runner. Molly worries that Jackie doesn't have any money and what will happen if she can't pay off Scary Brian (SB). She offers their wedding fund but Tyrone doesn't want to give his feckless mother their savings. Molly figures they might have to because of the probability of violence. It's only money. Does she deserve to get beaten up, Molly demands? Can I get back to you on that, Ty wryly remarks.

David and Amber enter the kebab shop. David is nagging Darryl for a free bag of chips. He flirts with Amber playfully, thoroughly enjoying Tina's obvious jealousy. Darryl just cringes.

Ty and Molly have been waiting all morning. It's after 12 now and still no sign of Jackie. (They're meeting SB at 3, you may recall). Ah but what do their bleary eyes discover? Jackie peeking around the corner to see if the coast is clear. Ty jumps out of the car before she can scarper. He startles her and she wails that he could have been followed. "You always were t'ick as pudding!" (you mean like that accent?) They hustle inside to have a serious word, Jackie admitting she'd only come back to fetch her passport.

Teresa gets off the bus just as Gail is passing by. Gail lets Teresa know that she's pulled a few strings and has got Dr. Patel to make a house call around 2 p.m. Terry thanks her and agrees Jerry doesn't look well and was going to call a doctor herself. She thanks Gail with a smile and turns around, her smile melting off her face and replaced by an expression of fear as Gail watches her go, her face clouded with suspicion.

Jackie runs around hollering in that grating voice she's got, pretending that she only borrowed the money to pay the water bill. (OH, come on, you know this is a load of hooey! Water bill, my Aunt Fanny!) but Molly believes her. Ty doesn't seem too sure. Jackie isn't so New Age anymore and is spewing out vile about having to stay in a posh house where she has to cater to a fat cat, recycle and separate rubbish, and the real Jackie Dobbs comes running out of that gob like an oil gusher. Tyrone isn't surprised but Molly looks like she's had a bit of a reality check. "I've never felt the flamin' serenity, just a big fat vein throbbin in me 'ead!"

Teresa is making out like it was her that asked Gail to call the doctor. Jerry goes to get showered but she puts the suggestion in his head that it's probably all down to panic attacks and he should play it down or he could end up back in hospital again which puts the fear into Jerry. He doesn't want that. And neither does she but not for the same reasons!

Tyrone and Molly have raided their bank account, Tyrone sure that they'll never seen that cash again.

The doctor has checked Jerry over and as predicted, he's saying he's following all the orders. No cholesterol, no alcohol. The doctor wants to run some blood tests but he puts her off saying he's got tests scheduled next week and probably just pushed himself too far. Dr. Patel reluctantly agrees that they can wait until next week for his tests but urges him to continue to take it easy and follow all his instructions properly. Jerry and Teresa are all smiles but Gail is still fairly quiet.

Darryl finds Amber and David giggling in his shed (they'd asked if they could use it when they were in the shop earlier). Amber's cozied up on the end of the bed against David's legs, looking like all her birthdays have come at once. David hints that they need more drinks so she goes off to the shop, leaving Darryl to admonish David for using Amber to get back at Tina.

Fiz tentatively approaches John in the pub. He offers to leave but she sits down. Seems Kirk and Julie have taken Chesney out for a day of exploring old churches. They make small talk but Fiz insists she doesn't want John to feel like he has to keep scurrying away every time he sees her (like the rat he is!). He notices the top she has on and remembers her wearing it a few days ago when he saw her in town with Kelly. He apologizes again and tells her they still fit together. Just then, Julie comes in but gets flustered when she sees them and rushes out again.

Over at another table, Norris and Rita are discussing Emily's funeral list, a bit surprised about some of her choices. They bring Liz into the conversation as she's passing for a minute. Norris offers to do a eulogy for Rita if she goes first and suggests that if she does his, she should mention his interest in languages and current affairs. Rita is as Rita always is. Sardonic and dismissive, leaving Norris gape mouthed yet again.

Molly is counting the cash. Jackie goes for an envelope and sidles up to Molly, starting off a sob story about how it's likely SB won't leave it at just 1000 grand. He's not just a sandwich short, the whole flaming picnic's gone awol! Molly naively believes SB will leave Jackie alone when he's got the money but she milks Molly for all she's worth, explaining how she could have a fresh start with the money instead. Ty overhears, though, and says if SB doesn't get the money, he and his lovely lass will be the target of violence. Molly can't understand why Tyrone would be so cold but he grabs the cash away and stalks off inside.

Fiz comes through the door to find Julie at the table with a pot of fresh tea. Kirk has taken Ches off for a pizza. Turns out Kirk and Ches weren't excited about a church cemetery and Julie is a bit narked. She brings up John and actually, she likes John and thinks he's a nice man. He's faced the music and is being all romantic and that, it's like a "rom com" arguably without the "com" (Romantic Comedy). She thinks they look like a real fit. That strikes a chord with Fiz. Julie thinks she'd be strong to take John back not weak and never mind what her mates might say. She doesn't think John is a terminal cheat and Fiz finally admits she hopes he doesn't give up on her, that she loves him being there and trying. She warns Fiz that there's only so much doghouse that a man can endure.

Tyrone hands over the cash to SB who counts it anyway. He doesn't care that it's their savings. Molly admonishes him for taking advantage of Jackie when she was desperate. Brian laughs and says she borrowed the money for a boob job in Spain! He drives away happy, Tyrone stands there humiliated and miserable. Molly is barely holding back the tears, angry and upset that they've been taken. Jackie scurries out from behind the net curtains which she'd been twitching. Tyrone lays in to her and she lays in to him, calling him a millstone around her neck. Molly anger erupts and is directed squarely at her future mother-in-law as it should be. She ridicules them until Tyrone hisses that she's not invited to the wedding. She derisively huffs There is a God!!! and as she goes back in the house she turns and spits out "Consider me dead!" Tyrone angrily mutters "How would I know the difference". His mother has stayed true to form, but Molly holds on to him and kisses him.

Teresa is peeling carrots and telling Kayleigh she isn't allowed to have a snack. Kayleigh is moaning and she is told to peel the rest of the veg and not to bother her father. Jerry has come downstairs slowly during this. Jerry and Teresa discuss her moving out. It seems like she's not going to be able to talk him round.

We're back to Molly and Tyrone in the car, parked up. Tyrone apologizes but Molly assures him it's not his fault for trying to look after his mother. He promises her he'll give her a lovely wedding even if he has to flog a kidney. They'll have it all, cake, dress and a hole at the top table (where Jackie won't be). She's still sniffling and he holds her close, just the two of them are all that matter.

Tvor Sean and Marcus are in the street. Marcus's phone rings. Sean leaves him to answer the phone as he sees Tom pull up in a car. While Marcus talks, Sean and Tom flirt together again. Marcus, very crabbily, I think anyway, asks them to keep it down a bit. Err, hello, Marcus- you're in the street! Anyway, Marcus gets off the phone and tells Sean he's going to have to cancel their date since he's is going to have to return to London tonight.

Darrell pulls up outside the Mortons' after picking up Mel from the airport. She is all tanned and lovely. Teresa is inside with Finn and Jerry, wondering what time she'll be able to move into her new flat. Mel instantly engages in some sniping at her mother and then realises that Jerry is not looking any better. Jerry asks Mel to stop arguing with Teresa and asks her about her holiday.

Outside Dev's shop, Dev is all scrubbed up for a schoomzey do with some Asian businessmen. He is leaving Amber in charge. Amber and he chat outside while Auntie Pam goes inside for some milk. Amber asks her Dad if it would be possible for her to move into the flat above the shop alone, since her Dad has the posh new flat to live in. Hah! As if! Pam comes back outside and tells the two of them she has left money on the counter for the milk since neither of them would come in to serve her. Dev relays Amber's ambitions to live alone to Pam. Amber argues that if she doesn't live with him, he'll have more privacy for "special occasions!" Dev tells her flat out, she's not going to be living in the shop flat alone. While Pam watches them argue, Molly and Tyrone pull up outside their house. Molly is visibly upset. Pam wants to know what's going on, naturally. She hears the words, "Mother-in-law" and when she sees Molly crying, gives her a big hug. She says, "Whatever it is, don't need to be discussed in t'street!" What? Doesn't she know the rules of Corrie? "Come inside you can tell me all about it," she says and Molly inside for a cup of tea and a chat.

At the Mortons' Teresa is getting ready to go. Jerry tells her that he's going to the cashpoint for some money. Teresa tells him that she doesn't want his money but if he would let her stay another couple of weeks, she'll be able to pay the first couple of weeks' rent herself. Mel is aghast that Jerry is letting her "sponge off him now". Jerry tells Teresa that she wants her to have some money. Teresa offers to make a nice apple pie and custard for Jerry before she goes. Jerry leaves but Mel can see right through her mother and tells her so. Mel is adamant that Teresa is bad news. Teresa tells Mel she'll be out of the house this evening and hands Mel the phone telling her she can book her a taxi to make sure.

In Streetcars, John and Eileen are blethering about an old kids show. Jerry comes in, looking absolutely terrible, I might add. Excellent job from the make-up people. Jerry asks for a taxi to the bank since he doesn't feel like walking. John and Eileen can both see how ill Jerry looks and after a bit more chat, Jerry leaves to go and grab some of that cash.

Jackie Dobbs turns up in the ginnel. She goes into Molly and Tyrone's back yard only to find Pam bringing in some washing. Pam is not best pleased to see her and tells her to clear off. Jackie argues but Jack turns up as well and backs up Pam after Pam tells him about how Jackie conned Molly and Tyrone out of their wedding money. "On yer bike! Out, or I'll be the one who's throwing you out!" he shouts at Jackie. Jackie knows when to cut her losses and leave. Jack and Pam conspire not to tell Tyrone that Jackie turned up.

Teresa is cooking in the Mortons' kitchen when Jerry comes back from the bank. Teresa tells him to sit down and put his feet up and brings him his pill. She goes back into the kitchen where she has a bottle of Jerry's medication hidden on the counter behind the tin of Birds' custard powder.

Out in Molly & Tyrone's back yard, Jack asks Tyrone if he would like Jack to cancel his upcoming trip to Blackpool. Tyrone says absolutely not since Jack has been looking forward to his trip for ages and he needs a break. Jack reminds Tyrone that if he needs money, Jack has some there for him but Tyrone refuses his offer. Tyrone is sad that his mam's gone and spoiled everything. But Jack reminds him that she hasn't spoiled anything and that he's got a little cracker in Molly and for him to look after her. Tyrone tells him he will, for sure.

Teresa sits Jerry down to his apple pie and custard. Mel and Finn come home. Mel needles her mother again and reminds her she needs to leave. Jerry thanks Teresa for everything she's done for him. Jerry tells him to "give over, you great soft lummox!" She knows he would do the same for her if he had to. "Eww! Pass the sick bucket!" Mel is not playing happy families.

Dev returns to his new luxury flat with his new best friend and the best friend's wife that he's having an affair with. Their names will come to me in a minute..... Nina, that's her name, has brought some colour charts round and suggestively tells Dev how she would like to help him decorate his new place. Her phone rings, it's somebody called Tara and she excuses herself to answer the call, giving Dev the glad eye on the way out. Prem, that's the new best friend's name, tells Dev he can see that Dev can't take his eyes off Nina. Dev looks alarmed. He tells Dev not to worry, Nina has that effect on all men. Dev is relieved that he hasn't been busted having it off with Prem's wife. Prem indulges in a spot of massaging Dev's ego. They talk about how somebody mistook Dev for his son. Prem tells him he enjoyed having Dev as his son for a while. Of course he would have loved to have a real son but it never happened. Prem looks wistfully into his glass.

Teresa's taxi has arrived. The family are all outside waiting to give Teresa a hug before she goes. Except Mel who just stands looking coldly at her mother. Jerry gives Teresa some cash before she leaves. Teresa asks Jerry if she's sure that he can manage without her. "He can now I'm back!" snaps Mel who is getting impatient. Teresa gets into the car, she has tears in her eyes as the car pulls away.

Back at Dev's, Nina has come back from her phone call to Tara, who is their daughter. Tara has broken up with her boyfriend or something. They talk about how Nina would love to go down to London to see her except she already has a business trip booked. Prem goes out to call his daughter. With Prem gone, Nina tells Dev he should book a suite for her and him to go away together next week- the trip she was talking about with Prem! Dev looks very uncomfortable and worried that Prem will come back in but doesn't refuse.

Teresa gets out of her cab and goes to see Malley. Uh-oh, Teresa has something up her sleeve. She says, "Malley love, I'm sorry about this. There's been a change of plan."

In the Rovers, Sean says goodbye to Marcus and makes him promise to call. Eileen says good bye and after Marcus is gone, she tells Sean that she can see Sean is jealous but assures him that Marcus loves him and would never do anything behind Sean's back.

Teresa, meanwhile is telling a pile of lies to Malley about how Jerry has worsened and how she can't leave him. But for the benefit of Jerry, who would never admit that he needed her, she asks Malley to pretend that her flat needed rewiring. She hands him a fistful of cold, hard cash and he agrees to lie for her.

In the Rovers, oh, it's the Sean and Tom show again. Their flirting, and Sean's willingness to give Tom credit since he's forgotten his wallet, doesn't go over Eileen's head though. She remarks to Sean that maybe Marcus should be worrying about Sean in his absence. Sean sees what she's getting at but protests, "Don't be daft! We're only 'avin' a laff!" Hmmmmm....?

Jerry is settled in front of the TV when the door bell rings. It's Teresa of course with the story about the rewiring of the new flat. Jerry is looking awful- his "guts are playing him up something shocking". Teresa demands to move back in. Jerry lets her in, reluctantly, but he does tell her, "It's good to have you back, you know." He shuts the door, looking pleased that she has returned.

Stella McLoughlin

Mel comes downstairs to find a rather pasty-faced Jerry sitting at the table. She asks where her mother is and he tells her she’s in the garden having breakfast – her first ciggie of the day. Mel is annoyed that her father has given in and let Teresa stay, and she doesn’t believe the story about the dodgy electrics for a minute, but Jerry can’t see why she would lie. Obviously, having two women warring across him is more than he can cope with and he sighs and buries his head in his hands.

Gail is having a flirty telephone conversation with Joe, arranging to meet him for lunch, when David comes downstairs for breakfast and she hangs up quickly. In a light-hearted mood she jokes with him before heading off for work.

Sean rushes into Eileen’s house searching frantically for his phone. He’s delighted that there’s a message from Marcus saying he’ll be home later. Just then, Eileen takes a call on her phone, it’s Todd who’s in London. (Like Marcus!) Sean tells her to say Hi from him and then rushes off back to work. As Eileen continues her conversation her face becomes very serious. “Really? Are you sure?” she says.

David sees Amber and Molly cleaning the shop windows and goes over and invites Amber round to his place at lunch time. She’s delighted and when he’s gone she tells Molly she’ll have to go home and get changed. “You’re joking!” says Molly, “it’s dinner-time, it’s not exactly a date is it?” Amber disagrees. “Just me and him? Together? It SO is a date!”

Jerry is sitting on the sofa looking absolutely terrible and greyer than ever. Mel keeps telling him he should phone Mally to check out Teresa’s story. In the end, to stop her pestering, he makes the call. Mally of course, has been primed by Teresa, and goes along with the re-wiring story. “Now can we please bury the hatchet!” he says to Mel.

When Amber gets home to change she finds Dev packing. He tells her he’s going on a golfing trip and asks why she’s come back. “I spilt something on my top,” she says quickly. “Something invisible to the naked eye?” he queries. She tells him it was vinegar and stinks like mad (quick thinking, girl!) and then asks where her hair straighteners are. He tells her he’ll be gone by the time she gets back so there’s to be no parties, no boys and no sitting up half the night scaring herself stupid watching horror movies. She tells him he’s her dad, he’s not supposed to be having a better time than her.

Teresa comes back from shopping with a fresh pineapple for Jerry. She’s only ever had pineapple from a tin before. Just then Mel comes downstairs. She’s been to see Mally and her suspicions were confirmed, all the stuff about dodgy wiring was a pack of lies. “I don’t know what you think you’re playing at,” she says to her mother. Jerry asks what’s going on and Teresa says she did it for him, he’s not well and in no fit state to look after himself. Mel says she can look after him but Teresa points out that she’s busy with work and has her own life to lead. She feels she’s needed there, and knows that Jerry is proud and wouldn’t ask for her help. As they argue round him, Jerry grimaces and looks worse than ever. In the end he tells Mel he’s heard enough and to leave it. Mel shouts and asks if he’s just going to sit there and let Teresa manipulate him. Poor Jerry, obviously suffering, tells her he doesn’t feel too good. Mel then shouts that either Teresa leaves or she’s going, for good! She then storms off upstairs.

Norris is in the corner shop asking for change when he notices Amber who’s looking like she’s dressed for a night on the town. Then David comes in to collect her. “Blimey, you brush up well,” he says. He suggests they go for a kebab but Amber pulls a face so in the end says they’ll go to the café.

Mel comes downstairs and asks if her mother’s gone. Jerry tells her she’s in the back garden getting some sun. Mel says she meant what she said earlier. He tells her that it’s not good for her to hold all that bitterness inside. Mel says that she knows that as soon as Teresa gets a better offer she’ll be off, just like the last time and the time before that. Jerry tries to tell her that people change, he knows she wasn’t the best mum in the world but she’s here now when they need her, and he wants her to stay. “What? You’d choose her instead of me?” cries Mel. Jerry, breathing heavily, says he doesn’t want anyone to go anywhere. “Just cut her a bit of slack,” he says.

Darryl and Mel are outside the kebab shop when they see David walk down the Street with Amber. Darryl says he never realised how good looking Amber is. Tina is not happy!

Kelly and Sean are in the café getting cakes for the workers. Eileen comes in and asks for a word with Sean. She tells him that Todd told her he’d seen Marcus in a club getting very cosy with another guy, they had their arms round each other. Sean says that things aren’t always like they seem, and he and Kelly go off back to work.

Emily is humming the tune to the 23rd Psalm, and then tells Norris she’d like it to be played at her funeral. Norris gets all twitchy and says he’s sorry about being so nosey when he found her envelope about what was to happen after her demise. She says she’s forgiven him.

David and Amber are back at David’s house when he pulls the curtains. “What’s going on,” says Amber, “are you planning to have your wicked way with me?” she adds, somewhat hopefully. He tells her they can’t watch a dvd with the sun coming in.

Dev and Nina arrive at their hotel suite and she immediately leads him off to the bedroom.

Watching the dvd, Amber casually puts her arm around David’s shoulders and then kisses him. David looks rather uncomfortable at all this.

Norris takes a bag of rubbish to the bin, but when he opens it he finds, on top of the rubbish already in it, the brown envelope that caused all the furore before. The one that has written on it: To be opened after my death. He pulls it out and looks at it, somewhat puzzled. This envelope has it’s gummy flap intact, it’s never been sealed.

Dev is lying back on the pillows. Nina strolls in from the bathroom in a silk robe and tells him she’s booked a hot stone massage. “Are you not coming back for round two with your very own sex-god?” he asks, patting his chest. She leans towards him. “Been there, done that, see you later,” she murmurs.

Trying to avoid Amber’s attentions, David points out they’re missing the film. She tells him they might as well turn it off, and kisses him some more.

In the kebab shop, Tina asks Darryl to phone David, but when he tries all he gets is voice mail. Kelly and Sean come in and order milk shakes and while they’re waiting Kelly tries to cheer Sean up. He’s torturing himself with the thought of Marcus with somebody else. Tina marches past them and out of the door.

Teresa and Jerry are sampling the pineapple and laughing when Mel comes in and tells them she’s going to stay at her friend Abbie’s. Jerry tries to stop her but she goes off, tearfully.

David and Amber are still snogging on the sofa when the door bursts open. It’s a very furious Tina. David jumps up, protesting that nothing happened. “So how come the curtains are shut then?” she demands to know, “how come her lippy’s all over your face?” Amber protests, saying it’s nothing to do with Tina as the two of them aren’t together any more, but they ignore her. “Tell her David!” cries Amber, but David just goes on talking to Tina, saying that her coming round just proves that she still wants him. If she didn’t, she wouldn’t care if he had a girl friend or not. “You and me are meant to be together, and you know it!” The penny finally drops with Amber and she sees what’s been going on. She gets up. “You used me! You pretended to like me and all the time you wanted her!” she cries and runs out. “Nice one,” says Tina to David. “You think I’m going to be impressed by that? Treating her as if she’s nothing?”

Teresa tells Jerry that Mel was like it as a kid, she’d cut her nose off to spite her face. Jerry, very distressed, starts looking for his phone. He lurches across the room and collapses, hitting his head hard on the coffee table as he goes down.

Anne Logan

No episode aired tonight.

Corrie output is a little odd at the moment. Nothing on Friday and then a Sunday episode having made a lot of fuss few months ago that the Street did not go out on a Sunday evening.

Teresa seems a bit stunned by Jerry's wonderful dive at the end of the last episode - including hitting his head on the table. She can't decide what to do for the best. Even worse than David pushing his dear old mama down the stairs. She almost phones for an ambulance beore deciding to do something about the pills, throws them away recovers from the bin and hyperventilates. Jerry lies still, blood appearing from one ear. Eventually she calls an ambulance - she refuses to put him in the recovery position claiming she would need a fork lift truck. Outside Mel and Darryl argue as the former departs but she is soon summoned back by the latter when an ambulance pulls up outside their house.

New man Tyrone notices Amber has a new top and had her hair done. He is less oblivious, Molly will be so proud. Anyway Amber nods and bursts into teats and the shop where Molly soon establishes that David Platt is at the bottom of all this.

And David and Tina are discussing why the latter is there. David gets her to admit that she has been bothered by the Amber thing. She calls him a pathetic idiot. He follows her to the shop and when she chats to Tom David admits he is jealous. She calls him a psycho possessive control freak and refuses to get back with him.

Norris wants to tell Rita what he has found but she is late to go and help Emily and departs.

Sean and Eileen discuss the news from Todd that Marcus was seen with another man, when just on cue a taxi arrives and Marcus emerges. Sean does not want to talk to him and although he is spotted and Marcus calls his name, Sean just ignores him. Marcus follows him into the shop and asks why he is being ignored. Sean denies that he is in such a way that we know he was being ignored. Sean gives a dig about the price of drinks in London and Marcus has to pay the 10p that Sean is short.

Nina knows a fool when she sees one and Dev is playing the part to perfection. He has to run a bath so the steam will drop the creases out of her dress and she is off again for an apricot body wrap in preference to Dev's embraces. Clever girl. Later they go down for dinner and it is apparent that she is well known, so presumably uses the place regularly!

Anyway the medical team take Jerry off to the hospital. Who knows how many tablets he has? No-one apparently. Teresa tells Darryl to follow in the car - if the medics discover the overdose she wants to be right there.

Joe and Gail have been seeing each other again - honestly his crumpet in the Chase was far better quality than this! They separate around the corner from the Street - and even Joe cannot predict if Tina will make it up with David.

Tina is sitting on Maxeem's bench when Tina arrives with some cock and bull story on the old rhyme

One for sorrow,
Two for joy,
Three for a girl,
Four for a boy,
Five for silver,
Six for gold,
Seven for a secret
Never to be told.

Only she changes six for a kiss and she and David kiss and it is all back on. (The rhyme was changed for Magpie and I wonder how Jenny Hanley is these days - I was taught by her brother Jeremy at one point - as they say close but no cigar!).

I am afraid I cannot excited by Emily's envelope - but Doris is. He found this one in the bin, never sealed and therefore not the one she let him read - Emily wants to keep her secret and can you blame her?

At the hospital there is a lot of waiting going on, mainly by Teresa who keeps disappearing for a fag.

Marcus cannot get Sean to tell him why he is so upset. But then if he has done nothing wrong why would Sean be upset? Eventually Eileen arrives and reveals the report from Todd of the clubbing which had gone on in London. At least Marcus now knows the cause of the upset.

Gail lets Ted in on her big secret about going out with her son's girlfriends father - I mean how would Ted like it? A real conundrum and best not answered on a family newsgroup. Anyway Gail reckons that if Tina and David remain split then she may find something special with Joe, and it will be the silver lining in the dark cloud.

Dev is sulking and cannot get Nina to admit how often she has visited the hotel. They have the whole evening ahead of them and will be please stop spoiling it - which he then takes on board. At which point Ravi appears and wants Nina's signature for a fan. Nina of course loves the attention and gets down to being famous!

Tina and David are snogging, after Tina admitted that six was not a kiss, when Ted and Gail return and as he observes this no longer looks like an argument. Gail manages a brief "Good". David asks if they are staying in and then grabbing Tina by the hand pulls her upstairs. Gail says she is pleased for them which Ted has trouble believing - but she is sincere even if it means that it is all over with Joe.

At the hospital it is not good news. The bump on his head has given him a bleed on the brand and due to the drugs his blood is thin and not clotting. And so Jerry is in surgery now. Jerry is in a serious condition - the surgeons are doing their best - he has a reasonable chance (which to be honest the way it was put does not sound much of a chance). Teresa looks worried and is told that they should prepare themselves - there are no guarantees.

And on that gloomy note Sunday night ended.
See you next week back to Friday I believe.

K Richard W

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Updates written by K Updates written by K Richard Whitbread, Martin Rosen, Ann Logan, Margaret Carr, Stella McLoughlin, Tvor, Erica Houston.

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