Curly's Attic

Unlike the "real" Guestbook, Chronicles threads are shown in chronological order, so you should read from the top down.

Having expressed my surprise at the above, I must say that I DO KNOW what Curly keeps in his attic....
Ian

Hey, IAN -- I thought it was a telescope! Please enlighten
Mary

...A telescope? Where did you hear that, Mary? it's true that Curly had a telescope up there at one time, back when he was a bin man, but he sold the thing to Eddie Yates when he left for Blackpool. Seems Eddie wanted a good view of the "sights" once Marion went to bed...
Ian

IAN, I don't think so - or if so he bought another telescope, because he built the observatory in his upstairs room long after Eddie left. It was when he was sharing the house with Angie, or just thereafter, I believe and it remained there at least until the time he had his hair bleached and spiked, because at the party he was offering to show it to one of the girls. 
Nancy, Ann Arbour

RIAN is completely right, as usual. Curly's abandonment of astronomy is shortly to be revealed in a tell-all tabloid shocker, in which he will do no more than allude to the reasons behind this shock move. But Ian knows them, and I know them, and we have both been sworn to secrecy about what he took up to replace astronomy in his barren existence. It's not pretty. Don't ask. You could not prise the information out of either of us. 
Dale, NZ

OK - Curly's Attic - this has got my imagination working overtime, and here are a few ideas : 
1) He has Ann Malone's frozen body in a crystal casket. 
2) He has kidnapped Raquel from France and has her living in comfort in his locked attic (a la "The Collector") 
3) He has a harem of scantily clad slave girls he rescued from their evil master 
4) He is growing frankenfoods hydroponically to sell to Freshco for a high return 
5)He is cloning silent sheep to be sold as housepets 
6)He has Maude, Scamper, Jamie, Brad, Sean the Bookie etc. in his attic, which, in fact, is the CORRIE BLACK HOLE !! 
Well, I am all guessed out - if I am close on any guess, will someone in the know please tell me I am warm, in fact I would love to be warm today in the snow. Happy Sunday to all.
Betsy, Kamloops

BETSY: Very fertile suggestions, petal, and no. 4 comes closest to the truth. But beyond that I'll say no more.
Dale

I smell a new GB mystery in the making. You See, All those lonely nights Curly has spent alone since Raquel left haven't gone for naught. He hasn't spent ALL of his time sniffing old dressing gowns and fending off unwanted lodgers. There were several Biology and Genetics textbooks on the bookshelf and some suspicious bookmarks in Curly's IE Favourites file on his laptop which Spider very nearly found. It was due to this near-discovery that Spider and Toyah were REALLY asked to leave Number 7. You didn't really think he was in Australia searching for Raquel when he couldn't track her down in Kuala Lumpur, did you?
Diane

Dear Nancy, I didn't mean to infer that Curly sold his telescope to Eddie when he left for that great tourist Mecca (Blackpool) - actually, Eddie came back and coerced the telescope from our Curly while the Street was being ransacked by Jim MacDonald and his evil band of hooligans (Liz and, well, LizY). 

But seeing as how one of the more diligent of the GB readers has seen fit to offer possible explanations to the questionY"what IS in Curly's attic", perhaps I can offer an explanationY(I hope the tabloid doesn't get wind of this) 

As RDale has allowed, given the possible solution from Kamloops Betsy, Curly has been cultivating something in his attic, and that something has been most active since this latest lunar eclipse!  I cannot say moreYY. 
Ian

OK, I know now - while searching for Raquel in the Far East, Curly discovered, on one sultry moonlit night, that he is, in fact, a werewolf. Realizing that this affliction could jeopardize his rise to the tip top corporate heights of Freshco, he sought help from an ancient Chinese Herbalist. He was given a small packet of special seeds. 

Upon arriving home in Weatherfield, he planted the seeds in his attic - the Ancient Man had explained that they would only grow after the Lunar Eclipse, and that if Curly drank the resulting fruit made into a sweet tea, he would be a werewolf no more. Now Curly is investigating the marketing potential of his secret garden bounty - perhaps under the name of "Werewolf Away" or "No More Hairy Nights". The success of the product would assure his place as President and CEO of Freshco. 

Wow, it all seems so clearly obvious now, doesn't it? Still, I am disappointed it was not the silent sheep. 

Am I warm, oh those who know??
Betsy

Betsy, I think Curly does have a hydroponic garden in his attic, because he has obtained the European monopoly on the sale and distribution of...Chia Pets, whose proliferation among the cognoscenti will lead to the cultural and economic downfall of the EEC, thus allowing him to become the Gates of Kitsch, whereupon Raquel will leave her French chateau, remarry Curly, and he will build her a Norman (pun!) castle on the Red Rec, and they'll live happily ever after, because no Battersby's will be allowed. Is that it? Do I get the prize? TFN
Ruth

Shh! BETSY!!! That's an "Ancient Chinese Secret"!!!!! Ruth in fact has the "official" story. As you can see, Gwen got a little too curious and crawled in through the skylight. Her viciously reproducing hair is the result! :)
Diane

If you have any archived material suitable for inclusion in the Chronicles, please email it to me:  digger@corrie.net

Back to the Chronicles homepage

Back to the Guestbook